Named characters
12541 [NARRATOR]
4212 Jameson (457)/Jameson Miles (74)/Miles (4)/Jameson Miles the CEO (2)/Jameson Miles CEO Miles (1)/Jameson Miles Miles (1)/JAMESON (1)/Screwing Jameson Miles (1)/the real Jameson Miles (1)/poor Jameson (1)/the Jameson Miles (1)
868 Aaron (183)
814 Emily (250)/Em (43)/Emily Foster (40)/Foster (4)
693 Tristan (180)/Tristan Miles (8)/Tris (4)/TRISTAN MILES (1)
643 Molly (177)/Moll (7)/Marjorie (4)/Keeley May (1)/Keely May (1)/Keeley (1)
632 Jay (60)/Jake (53)/Jay xox (1)/Stupid Jake (1)/Jake the investigator (1)/Jake Peters (1)
382 Alan (77)/trusty Alan (1)
308 Jim (44)/beautiful Jim (1)/playful Jim (1)
215 Claudia (29)/Claudia Mason (4)/Mason (4)
154 Mr. Masters (21)/Mr. Master (2)/Mr Masters Mr Spencer (1)
145 Gabriel Ferrara (13)/Ferrara (12)/Gabriel (7)/Mr. Ferrara (4)/Mr. Gabriel Ferrara (1)
137 Mr. Miles (72)/Miles (3)/Dear Mr. Miles (1)/Mr. Miles the CEO (1)/the enigmatic Mr. Miles (1)/Mr Miles (1)
106 Hayden (30)/Hayden Morris (1)/Morris (1)
106 Emerson (28)/poor Emerson (1)
90 Robbie (27)/Robbie McIntyre (1)
83 Ava (33)
75 Marley (23)/Marley Smithson (1)
73 Elliot (47)
72 Claire (14)/Claire Anderson (4)
56 Athena (10)
54 Ricardo (16)
43 Samuel (12)
42 Lara Aspin (7)
41 God (37)/Dear God (3)/Oh God (1)
40 Michael (12)/Magic Mike XXL (6)/Magic Mike (2)/Mike (1)
39 Lindsey (19)
33 Christopher (20)/Christopher Miles (1)
28 Chloe (14)
27 Sammia (15)
24 Brad (4)
24 Melina (5)
20 Paul (8)
20 Ms. Foster (11)/Miss Foster (1)
20 Claud (8)
20 Rena (1)
17 Richard (7)
17 Matthew (4)/Matthew Price (1)
16 Jameson Miles (6)/Jameson Grant Miles (1)/Miles (1)/Jameson (1)
15 Miles Media (11)/Miles (4)
13 Mom (11)
13 George (6)/George Miles Sr (1)/Miles (1)
10 Marjorie (3)/Marjorie Bishop (1)
10 Mark (5)
9 Bessie (8)
9 Willow (5)
7 Stoneface (2)
7 Lauren (5)
7 Aarons (1)
6 Daniel (3)/Danny Rupert (2)
6 Julian Masters (2)/Mrs. Julian Masters (1)
5 Margaret (1)
5 Chanel (4)/Pure little Chanel (1)
5 Jesus (3)/Jesus Christ (2)
5 Elizabeth (2)/Melissa (1)/Lisa K. (1)
5 the Kung Fu Panda (3)/Kung Fu Panda (1)
5 Mr. Smith (2)
5 Brielle (4)/Miss Brielle (1)
4 Jessica (3)/JESSICA (1)
4 Frances (2)
4 Robert Day Daniels (4)
4 Grace (2)/Henschke (1)/Henschke Hill of Grace (1)
4 Renee (4)
4 Dad (3)
4 Harry (2)/Harrison (1)
4 Hannah (4)
4 Kellie (1)
3 HR (2)
3 Rebecca (2)
3 Uber Eats (2)/Uber (1)
3 Dear FB (1)/FB xoxoxo (1)/FB (1)
3 Zuckerberg (3)
3 Babe (1)
3 Baby (2)
3 Empathy (1)
3 Hayley (2)
3 Belinda (3)
2 Stanton (2)
2 Backseat Barbie (2)
2 Boy (1)/Lake Boy (1)
2 Mischa (2)
2 Deadly (2)
2 Primal (1)
2 Mr. J (1)/Dear Mr. J (1)
2 Rocco (2)
2 Mr. Peters (2)
2 Madam Whorebag (1)
2 Steven King (1)
2 Mrs. Miles (1)
2 Vicki (1)/Vic (1)
Major entities (proper, common)
FAC
19 Miles Media
4 Central Park
3 Miles - High Club/the Miles - High Club/Miles High Club
3 Park Avenue
3 Bryant Park
2 Heathrow Airport
2 the Gazette
1 Most Wanted
1 Mile - High Club
1 level sixty
86 home/Home
80 here
52 the street/The street
44 the office/The office
32 the room/The room
30 the building
28 the bathroom/The bathroom
26 there
25 the bar/The bar
24 his office
GPE
81 New York
21 London
7 Boston
5 California
5 Vegas
3 Brooklyn
2 Seattle
2 Lincoln
2 Aspen
2 Alcatraz
9 the city
7 there
6 town
3 This place/this place
3 this city/This city
2 the country
2 the UK
1 the same city
1 the United States
1 one of the largest in the world
LOC
3 bumfuck nowhere/Bumfuck nowhere
1 Notting Hill
1 CEO heaven
1 the Hamptons
1 the Bahamas
1 Mount Kosciuszko
28 the world/The world
6 the water/The water
5 the forest
4 earth
3 the planet
3 the outside world
2 the country
2 different sides of the world
2 this alternate universe
2 this world
PER
544 Jameson/Jameson Miles/Miles/Jameson Miles the CEO/Jameson Miles CEO Miles/Jameson Miles Miles/JAMESON/Screwing Jameson Miles/the real Jameson Miles/poor Jameson/the Jameson Miles
337 Emily/Em/Emily Foster/Foster
193 Tristan/Tristan Miles/Tris/TRISTAN MILES
191 Molly/Moll/Marjorie/Keeley May/Keely May/Keeley
183 Aaron
117 Jay/Jake/Jay xox/Stupid Jake/Jake the investigator/Jake Peters
79 Mr. Miles/Miles/Dear Mr. Miles/Mr. Miles the CEO/the enigmatic Mr. Miles/Mr Miles
78 Alan/trusty Alan
47 Elliot
46 Jim/beautiful Jim/playful Jim
76 each other
36 sir
31 this man/This man
30 someone/Someone
28 anyone
28 Nobody/nobody
25 The waiter/the waiter
22 a man/A man
19 everyone/Everyone
18 people/People
ORG
22 Miles Media/MILES MEDIA
2 Ferrara Media
2 Anderson Media
1 British Vogue
1 the Gazette
1 The NYPD
1 the Swan Squad
8 the company
3 the Gazette
3 your company
1 Amazon.com , Inc.
1 some ritzy company
1 the biggest conglomerate media empire in the United States
1 the best companies in the United States
1 the police department
1 an empire
1 a corporate investigation firm
VEH
53 the car/The car
25 the elevator
23 the limo/The limo
17 the plane/The plane
15 the bus/The bus
10 a car
7 a cab
7 the truck
4 my limo
4 this car/This car
Text
OTHER TITLES BY T L SWAN Stanton Adore [Stanton]84-stanton Unconditional [Stanton]84-stanton Completely Stanton Bliss [Marx Girl Gym Junkie Dr Stanton Dr Stantons]254-marx girl gym junkie dr stanton dr stantons : The Epilogue Find [Me]0-i Alastar Play Along [Mr Masters Mr Spencer]85-mr. masters This is a work of fiction . Names , characters , organizations , places , events , and incidents are either products of [the author]255-the author ’s imagination or are used fictitiously . Any resemblance to [actual persons]256-actual persons , living or dead , or actual events is purely coincidental . Text copyright © 2019 by T L Swan All rights reserved . No part of this book may be reproduced , or stored in a retrieval system , or transmitted in any form or by any means , electronic , mechanical , photocopying , recording , or otherwise , without express written permission of [the publisher]257-the publisher . Published by Montlake Romance , Seattle www.apub.com Amazon , the Amazon logo , and [Montlake Romance]86-montlake romance are trademarks of [Amazon.com , Inc.]258-amazon.com , inc. , or [[its]258-amazon.com , inc. affiliates]259-its affiliates . ISBN-13 : 9781542015875 ISBN-10 : 1542015871 Cover design by @blacksheep - uk.com [I]0-i would like to dedicate this book to the alphabet , for those twenty - six letters have changed [my]0-i life . Within those twenty - six letters [I]0-i found [myself]0-i , and now [I]0-i live [my]0-i dream . Next time [you]260-you say the alphabet , remember its power . [I]0-i do every day . CONTENTS Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14 Chapter 15 Chapter 16 Chapter 17 Chapter 18 Chapter 19 Chapter 20 Chapter 21 Chapter 22 Chapter 23 Chapter 24 Chapter 25 Chapter 26 Chapter 27 Epilogue Preview : The Takeover Preview : [Mr. Masters]85-mr. masters ACKNOWLEDGMENTS ABOUT THE AUTHOR Chapter 1 “ Can [you]0-i move ? ”[261-the man behind me in the line] a voice behind [me]0-i growls . Startled , [I]0-i turn toward [the man behind [me]0-i in the line]261-the man behind me in the line . “ [I]0-i ’m sorry ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i say in a fluster . “ Did [you]261-the man behind me in the line want to get past ? ”[0-i] “ No . [I]261-the man behind me in the line want [these fucking idiots at the desk]3060-these fucking idiots at the desk to hurry up . [I]261-the man behind me in the line ’m going to miss [[my]261-the man behind me in the line damn plane]3061-my damn plane . ”[261-the man behind me in the line] [He]261-the man behind me in the line sneers , and [I]0-i smell the alcohol wafting off [him]261-the man behind me in the line . “ [They]3060-these fucking idiots at the desk make [me]261-the man behind me in the line sick . ”[261-the man behind me in the line] [I]0-i turn back to the front . Great , [a drunk in the check - in line]262-a drunk in the check - in line . Just what [I]0-i need . [Heathrow Airport]1-heathrow airport is bustling . Bad weather has delayed most of the flights , and to be honest , [I]0-i wish [they]263-they would delay [mine]0-i . Then [I]0-i could turn around and go back to [the hotel]264-the hotel and sleep for a week . [I]0-i am not in the mood for this shit . [I]0-i hear [the man]265-the man turn and complain to [the people behind [him]265-the man]266-the people behind him , and [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . Why are [people]267-people so damn rude ? For another ten minutes , [I]0-i listen to [him]265-the man bitch , sigh , and moan until [I]0-i can take it no longer . [I]0-i turn to [him]265-the man . “ [They]267-people are working as fast as [they]267-people can . There ’s no need to be rude , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ What ? ”[265-the man] [he]265-the man yells as [he]265-the man turns [his]265-the man anger on [me]0-i . “ Manners are free , ”[0-i] [I]0-i mutter under [my]0-i breath . “ Manners are free ? ”[265-the man] [he]265-the man cries . “ What are [you]265-the man , [a schoolteacher]3062-a schoolteacher ? Or just [a raving bitch]3063-a raving bitch ? ”[265-the man] [I]0-i glare at [him]265-the man . Oh , [I]0-i dare all right . [I]0-i ’ve just spent the last forty - eight hours in hell . [I]0-i flew across [the world]268-the world to go to a wedding , only to watch [[my]0-i ex - boyfriend]269-my ex - boyfriend drape [himself]269-my ex - boyfriend over [[his]269-my ex - boyfriend new girlfriend]270-his new girlfriend . [I]0-i ’m in the mood to cut [somebody]271-somebody today . Do n’t mess with [me]0-i . [I]0-i turn back to the front as [my]0-i fury begins to boil . [He]265-the man kicks [my]0-i suitcase at [my]0-i feet , and [I]0-i turn . “ Stop it , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . [He]265-the man gets right up in [my]0-i face , and [I]0-i wince at the smell of [his]265-the man breath . “ [I]265-the man ’ll do whatever [I]265-the man fucking like . ”[265-the man] [I]0-i see [security]272-security come through [the lounge]273-the lounge as [they]272-security watch [him]265-the man . [The staff]274-the staff have seen what ’s going on [here]275-here and called for backup . [I]0-i fake a smile . “ Please do n’t kick [my]0-i bag , [sir]3064-sir , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say sweetly . “ [I]265-the man ’ll kick whatever [I]265-the man fucking like . ”[265-the man] [He]265-the man picks up [my]0-i suitcase and throws it across [the airport]276-the airport . “ What the hell ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i screech . “ Hey , ”[0-i] [the man behind [us]278-us]277-the man behind us cries . “ Do n’t touch [her]279-my savior stuff . [Security]272-security ! ”[265-the man] [he]265-the man says . [Mr. Drunk and Disorderly]87-mr. drunk and disorderly throws a punch at [[my]0-i savior]279-my savior , and a scuffle breaks out . [Security]272-security comes running in from everywhere , and [I]0-i am pushed back as [he]265-the man throws punches and screams obscenities . Oh hell , [I]0-i do not need this today . Eventually [they]272-security get [him]265-the man under control , and [he]265-the man is taken away in handcuffs . [The kind security guard]281-the kind security guard picks up [my]0-i bag . “ Sorry about that , ”[281-the kind security guard] [he]281-the kind security guard apologizes . “ Come with [me]281-the kind security guard , ”[281-the kind security guard] [he]281-the kind security guard says as [he]281-the kind security guard unhooks the rope on the line . “ Thank [you]281-the kind security guard . ”[281-the kind security guard] [I]0-i smile awkwardly at [everyone else in the line]282-everyone else in the line . [I]0-i hate jumping the queue , but at this point , [I]0-i just do n’t care . “ Great . ”[281-the kind security guard] [I]0-i sheepishly follow [him]281-the kind security guard , and [he]281-the kind security guard takes [me]0-i to [a young man]283-a young man ’s counter . [He]281-the kind security guard looks up and smiles broadly . “ Hello . ”[281-the kind security guard] “ Hi . ”[281-the kind security guard] “ Are [you]0-i okay ? ”[281-the kind security guard] [he]281-the kind security guard asks . “ Yes , [I]281-the kind security guard ’m fine . Thank [you]284-the security guard for asking . ”[281-the kind security guard] “ Look after [her]283-a young man , ”[284-the security guard] [the security guard]284-the security guard tells [the ticket man]285-the ticket man , and [he]281-the kind security guard gives [us]286-us both a wink and disappears through [the crowd]287-the crowd . “ Identification , please ? ”[265-the man] [the man]265-the man asks . [I]0-i scramble through [my]0-i purse and dig out [my]0-i passport and pass it over ; [he]281-the kind security guard smiles as [he]281-the kind security guard looks at the photo . Oh man , that ’s the worst photo in all of history . “ Did [you]281-the kind security guard see [me]0-i on [Most Wanted]2-most wanted ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Possibly . That photo : Is it even [you]0-i ? ”[281-the kind security guard] [He]281-the kind security guard laughs . [I]0-i smile , embarrassed . “ [I]281-the kind security guard hope not . [I]281-the kind security guard ’m in trouble if it is . ”[281-the kind security guard] [He]281-the kind security guard types in [my]0-i details . “ Okay , so [we]3066-we have [you]0-i flying to [New York]3-new york today with a . . . ”[281-the kind security guard] [He]281-the kind security guard stops typing and reads . “ Uh - huh . Preferably not next to [that man]3067-that man . ”[281-the kind security guard] “ [He]3067-that man wo n’t be going anywhere today , ”[281-the kind security guard] [he]281-the kind security guard replies as [he]281-the kind security guard continues to type at a ridiculous speed . “ Other than the lockup . ”[281-the kind security guard] “ Why would [you]281-the kind security guard get drunk before coming to [the airport]276-the airport ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [He]3067-that man has n’t even been inside to [the airport bars]3069-the airport bars yet . ”[0-i] “ [You]0-i would be surprised by what goes on around here , ”[281-the kind security guard] [he]281-the kind security guard sighs . [I]0-i smile ; [this guy]289-this guy is nice . [He]281-the kind security guard prints off [my]0-i tickets . “ [I]281-the kind security guard ’ve upgraded [you]0-i . ”[281-the kind security guard] “ What ? ”[281-the kind security guard] “ First class , as an apology for [him]3067-that man mishandling [your]0-i bag . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes widen . “ Oh , that ’s not necessary . . . really , ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . [He]281-the kind security guard hands the tickets over and smiles broadly . “ Enjoy [your]0-i flight . ”[281-the kind security guard] “ Thank [you]281-the kind security guard so much , ”[0-i] [I]0-i gush . [He]281-the kind security guard gives [me]0-i a wink , and [I]0-i could just reach over and hug [him]281-the kind security guard . But of course [I]0-i wo n’t . [I]0-i ’ll pretend that cool things like this happen to [me]0-i every day . “ Thanks again . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ [You]281-the kind security guard have access to [the VIP lounge]3070-the vip lounge , which is located on [level one]3071-level one . Lunch and drinks are on [the house]3072-the house in [there]3073-there . Have a safe flight . ”[0-i] With one last smile , [he]281-the kind security guard looks back to the line . “ Next , please . ”[281-the kind security guard] [I]0-i walk through the baggage checks with a huge goofy grin on [my]0-i face . First class — just what [the doctor]290-the doctor ordered . Three hours later , [I]0-i walk onto [the plane]291-the plane like [a rock star]292-a rock star . [I]0-i did n’t end up going into [the VIP lounge]3070-the vip lounge because , well . . . [I]0-i look like crap . [My]0-i long dark hair is up in a high ponytail , and [I]0-i ’m wearing black leggings , a baggy pink sweater , and tennis shoes , but [I]0-i did fix [my]0-i makeup a little , so that ’s something . If [I]0-i had known [I]0-i was going to be upgraded , [I]0-i would have at least tried to look the part and worn something swanky instead of looking like [a homeless person]294-a homeless person . But anyway . . . who cares ? It ’s not like [I]0-i ’m going to see [[anyone]295-anyone [I]0-i know]296-anyone i know . [I]0-i hand [my]0-i ticket over to [the flight attendant]297-the flight attendant . “ Just through [the left aisle]3074-the left aisle and to the right . ”[0-i] “ Thanks . ”[0-i] [I]0-i look at [my]0-i ticket and walk through [the plane]291-the plane and see [my]0-i number . 1B. Damn it , [I]0-i do n’t have a window . [I]0-i get to [my]0-i seat , and [a man sitting next to the window]299-a man sitting next to the window turns to [me]0-i . Big blue eyes greet [me]0-i , and [he]299-a man sitting next to the window smiles . “ Hello . ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] “ Hi , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say . Oh no . . . [I]0-i ’m sitting next to [God]88-god ’s gift to [women]300-women . . . only [he]299-a man sitting next to the window ’s hotter . [I]0-i look like shit . Fuck it . [I]0-i open the overhead , and [he]299-a man sitting next to the window stands . “ Here , let [me]299-a man sitting next to the window . ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [He]299-a man sitting next to the window takes [my]0-i bag from [me]0-i and carefully places it up . [He]299-a man sitting next to the window ’s tall and built and wearing blue jeans and a white T - shirt ; [he]299-a man sitting next to the window smells like the best aftershave in history . “ Thanks , ”[0-i] [I]0-i murmur as [I]0-i pull [my]0-i hand through [my]0-i ponytail , trying to smooth out the knots . [I]0-i mentally kick [myself]0-i for not wearing something better . “ Do [you]0-i want the window seat ? ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [he]299-a man sitting next to the window asks . [I]0-i stare at [him]299-a man sitting next to the window as [my]0-i brain misfires . [He]299-a man sitting next to the window gestures to the seat beside the window . “ [You]0-i do n’t mind ? ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [I]0-i frown . “ Not at all . ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [He]299-a man sitting next to the window smiles . “ [I]299-a man sitting next to the window fly all the time . [You]0-i can have it . ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [I]0-i force a smile . “ Thanks . ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] That was code for “ [I]0-i know [you]0-i got upgraded , [[you]0-i poor homeless person]3075-you poor homeless person , and [I]0-i feel sorry for [you]0-i . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sit down in [my]0-i seat and look nervously out the window , with [my]0-i hands clasped in front of [me]0-i on [my]0-i lap . “ Are [you]0-i going [home]3076-home ? ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [he]299-a man sitting next to the window asks . [I]0-i turn to [him]299-a man sitting next to the window . Oh , please do n’t talk to [me]0-i . [You]299-a man sitting next to the window make [me]0-i nervous just sitting there . “ No , [I]299-a man sitting next to the window ’ve been at a wedding , and [I]299-a man sitting next to the window have a job interview in [New York]3-new york on the way [home]3076-home . [I]299-a man sitting next to the window ’m only [there]3073-there for the day , and then [I]299-a man sitting next to the window fly out again to [LA]4-la . [I]299-a man sitting next to the window live [there]3073-there . ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] “ Ah . ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [He]299-a man sitting next to the window smiles . “ [I]299-a man sitting next to the window see . ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [I]0-i stare at [him]299-a man sitting next to the window for a moment ; [I]0-i should ask [him]299-a man sitting next to the window a question now . “ Are . . . [you]299-a man sitting next to the window going [home]3076-home ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i say . “ Yes . ”[0-i] [I]0-i nod , unsure what to say next , so [I]0-i choose the lame option and stare back out the window . [The attendant]301-the attendant walks around with a bottle of champagne and glasses . Glasses . Since when do [airlines]302-airlines give [you]303-you a real glass ? Oh right , [first class]304-first class . [I]0-i knew that . “ Would [you]299-a man sitting next to the window like some champagne to take off with , [sir]3064-sir ? ”[297-the flight attendant] [the flight attendant]297-the flight attendant asks [him]299-a man sitting next to the window . [I]0-i notice that [her]297-the flight attendant name tag says [JESSICA]89-jessica . “ That would be lovely . ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [He]299-a man sitting next to the window smiles and turns to [me]0-i . “ Make that two , please . ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [I]0-i frown as [she]297-the flight attendant pours two glasses of champagne and passes one to [him]299-a man sitting next to the window and one to [me]0-i . “ Thank [you]299-a man sitting next to the window . ”[297-the flight attendant] [I]0-i smile . [I]0-i wait for [Jessica]89-jessica to move out of earshot . “ Do [you]299-a man sitting next to the window always order drinks for [other people]3082-other people ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . [He]299-a man sitting next to the window looks surprised by [my]0-i statement . “ Did it bother [you]299-a man sitting next to the window ? ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] “ Not at all , ”[0-i] [I]0-i huff . Damn this Mr. Fancy Pants for thinking [he]299-a man sitting next to the window can order for [me]0-i . “ [I]299-a man sitting next to the window do like to order [my]299-a man sitting next to the window own drinks , though . ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [He]299-a man sitting next to the window smiles . “ Well , [you]0-i can order the next ones , then . ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [He]299-a man sitting next to the window raises [his]299-a man sitting next to the window glass to [me]0-i and smirks ; then [he]299-a man sitting next to the window takes a sip . [He]299-a man sitting next to the window seems amused by [my]0-i annoyance . [I]0-i stare at [him]299-a man sitting next to the window deadpan . This could be victim number two of [my]0-i cutting today . [I]0-i am not in the mood for [some rich old bastard]306-some rich old bastard to boss [me]0-i around . [I]0-i sip [my]0-i champagne as [I]0-i look out the window . Well , [he]299-a man sitting next to the window ’s not really old . Maybe mid- to late thirties . [I]0-i mean , old compared to [me]0-i ; [I]0-i ’m twenty - five . But whatever . “ [I]299-a man sitting next to the window ’m [Jim]90-jim , ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [he]299-a man sitting next to the window says as [he]299-a man sitting next to the window holds [his]299-a man sitting next to the window hand out to shake [mine]0-i . Oh God , now [I]0-i have to be polite . [I]0-i shake [his]299-a man sitting next to the window hand . “ Hi , [Jim]90-jim . [I]0-i ’m [Emily]91-emily . ”[0-i] [His]299-a man sitting next to the window eyes dance with mischief . “ Hello , [Emily]91-emily . ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [His]299-a man sitting next to the window eyes are big , bright blue , and dreamy , the kind [I]0-i could get lost in . But why is [he]299-a man sitting next to the window looking at [me]0-i like that ? [The plane]291-the plane begins to travel slowly down [the runway]308-the runway , and [I]0-i look between the earphones and armrest . Where do these plug in ? [They]309-they ’re high tech , the kind that overconfident YouTubers use . [They]309-they do n’t even have a cord . [I]0-i look around . Well , this is stupid . How do [I]0-i plug them in ? “ [They]309-they ’re Bluetooth , ”[90-jim] [Jim]90-jim interrupts [me]0-i . “ Oh , ”[90-jim] [I]0-i mutter , feeling stupid . Of course [they]309-they are . “ Right . ”[90-jim] “ [You]0-i have n’t flown first class before ? ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [he]299-a man sitting next to the window asks . “ No . [I]299-a man sitting next to the window got an upgrade . [Some weirdo]3083-some weirdo threw [my]299-a man sitting next to the window bag across [the airport]276-the airport when [he]3083-some weirdo was drunk . [I]299-a man sitting next to the window think [the guy at the desk]3085-the guy at the desk felt sorry for [me]299-a man sitting next to the window . ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [I]0-i give [him]299-a man sitting next to the window a lopsided smile . [He]299-a man sitting next to the window rolls [his]299-a man sitting next to the window lips as if amused and sips [his]299-a man sitting next to the window champagne ; [his]299-a man sitting next to the window eyes linger on [my]0-i face as if [he]299-a man sitting next to the window has something on [his]299-a man sitting next to the window mind . “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Perhaps [the guy at the desk]3085-the guy at the desk thought [you]0-i were gorgeous and upgraded [you]0-i to try to impress [you]0-i . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i had n’t thought of that . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sip [my]0-i champagne as [I]0-i try to hide [my]0-i smile . That ’s an odd thing to say . “ Is that what [you]299-a man sitting next to the window would do ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ If [you]299-a man sitting next to the window were at the desk , would [you]299-a man sitting next to the window upgrade [women]300-women to impress [them]300-women ? ”[0-i] “ Absolutely . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk . “ Impressing [a woman [you]0-i ’re attracted to]3088-a woman you ’re attracted to is crucial , ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [he]299-a man sitting next to the window continues . [I]0-i stare at [him]299-a man sitting next to the window as [I]0-i try to get [my]0-i brain to keep up with the conversation . Why does that statement sound flirty ? “ And do tell . . . how would [you]299-a man sitting next to the window impress [a woman [you]299-a man sitting next to the window ’re attracted to]3088-a woman you ’re attracted to ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask , fascinated . [His]299-a man sitting next to the window eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ Offer [her]3088-a woman you ’re attracted to a window seat . ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] The air crackles between [us]310-us , and [I]0-i bite [my]0-i lip to hide [my]0-i goofy smile . “ [You]299-a man sitting next to the window ’re trying to impress [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . [He]299-a man sitting next to the window gives [me]0-i a slow , sexy smile . “ How am [I]299-a man sitting next to the window doing ? ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [I]0-i smirk , unsure what to say . “ [I]299-a man sitting next to the window ’m simply saying that [you]299-a man sitting next to the window ’re attractive , nothing more and nothing less . Do n’t read into it . It was a statement , not a question . ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] “ Oh . ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [I]0-i stare at [him]299-a man sitting next to the window , lost for words . What do [I]0-i even say to that ? Statement , not a question . . . huh ? Do n’t read into it . [This guy]289-this guy is weird . . . and utterly gorgeous . [The plane]291-the plane begins to take off with speed , and [I]0-i hold on to [my]0-i armrests and scrunch [my]0-i eyes shut . “ [You]0-i do n’t like takeoffs ? ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [he]299-a man sitting next to the window asks . “ Do [I]299-a man sitting next to the window look like [I]299-a man sitting next to the window like takeoffs ? ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [I]0-i wince as [I]0-i hang on for dear life . “ [I]299-a man sitting next to the window love them , ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [he]299-a man sitting next to the window replies casually . “ [I]299-a man sitting next to the window love the feeling of power as it surges forward . That g - force throwback . ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] Okay . . . why is everything coming out of [his]299-a man sitting next to the window mouth sounding sexual ? God , [I]0-i need to get laid . . . stat . [I]0-i exhale and stare out the window as [we]313-we go higher and higher . [I]0-i do n’t have the energy for [this guy]289-this guy to play cute today . [I]0-i ’m tired , [I]0-i ’m hungover , [I]0-i look crappy , and [[my]0-i ex]315-my ex is [a douche]316-a douche . [I]0-i want to go to sleep and wake up next year . [I]0-i decide [I]0-i ’ll watch a movie . [I]0-i begin to flick through the choices on the screen in front of [me]0-i . [He]299-a man sitting next to the window leans over and says , “ [Great minds]3090-great minds think alike . [I]299-a man sitting next to the window ’m watching a movie too . ”[299-a man sitting next to the window] [I]0-i fake a smile . Just stop being all hot and in [my]0-i space . [You]317-you ’re probably married to [a vegan yoga nut who does meditation and shit]318-a vegan yoga nut who does meditation and shit . “ Great , ”[0-i] [I]0-i mutter deadpan . [I]0-i should have flown [coach]319-coach ; at least [I]0-i would n’t have had to inhale the scent of [beautiful man]320-beautiful man for eight long , sexless hours . [I]0-i scroll through [my]0-i screen and then narrow it down to [my]0-i choices . How to Lose [a Guy]321-a guy in 10 Days . Pride and [Prejudice]92-prejudice . The Heat . [Jumanji]93-jumanji . . . well , that has the Rock in it — it has to be good . [Notting Hill]5-notting hill . The Proposal . 50 First Dates . [Bridget Jones]94-bridget jones ’s Diary . [Pretty Woman]95-pretty woman . Sleepless in [Seattle]6-seattle . [Magic Mike XXL]96-michael . [I]0-i smile at the choices , all of [my]0-i favorites lined in a row ; this flight is going to be a dream . [I]0-i have n’t seen the sequel to [Magic Mike]96-michael yet , so [I]0-i might start with that one . [I]0-i glance over to look at what [Jim]90-jim has picked , and [I]0-i see the heading come up . [Lincoln]7-lincoln . Ugh . . . a political movie . Who watches that stuff for fun ? [I]0-i should have known [he]321-a guy ’d be boring . [He]321-a guy reaches up and taps the screen , and [I]0-i catch sight of [his]321-a guy watch . A chunky silver Rolex . Ugh , and [he]321-a guy has money too . Typical . “ What are [you]0-i going to watch ? ”[321-a guy] [he]321-a guy asks . Oh no . . . [I]0-i do n’t want to appear ditzy . “ [I]0-i ’m not sure yet , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply . Damn [you]321-a guy . . . [I]0-i want to watch [men strip]322-men strip . “ What are [you]321-a guy watching ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [Lincoln]7-lincoln . [I]0-i ’ve been meaning to see it for a long time . ”[0-i] “ Sounds boring , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say . [He]321-a guy smiles at [my]0-i answer . “ [I]321-a guy ’ll let [you]0-i know . ”[321-a guy] [He]321-a guy puts [his]321-a guy earphones on and begins to watch [his]321-a guy movie , and [I]0-i scroll through [my]0-i choices again . [I]0-i really want to watch [Magic Mike XXL]96-michael . Does it matter if [he]321-a guy sees ? No . . . that ’s just embarrassing . It makes [me]0-i look desperate . Who am [I]0-i kidding ? [I]0-i am desperate . [I]0-i have n’t seen [a dick]323-a dick in over a year . [I]0-i tap on The Proposal . [I]0-i ’ll swap one fantasy for another . [I]0-i ’ve always dreamed of having [Ryan Reynolds]97-ryan reynolds as [[my]0-i personal assistant]324-my personal assistant . The movie begins , and [I]0-i smile at the screen . [I]0-i love this movie . No matter how many times [I]0-i watch it , [I]0-i always laugh . Gammy is [my]0-i favorite . “ [You]0-i ’re watching a romance ? ”[321-a guy] [he]321-a guy asks . “ A rom - com , ”[321-a guy] [I]0-i reply . For God ’s sake , [this guy]289-this guy is nosy . [He]289-this guy smirks as if [he]289-this guy ’s better than [me]0-i . “ More champagne ? ”[297-the flight attendant] [the flight attendant]297-the flight attendant asks . [Blue Eyes]98-blue eyes looks over at [me]0-i . “ Here ’s [your]321-a guy chance to order for [us]3091-us . ”[98-blue eyes] [I]0-i stare at [him]321-a guy flatly ; all right , [he]321-a guy ’s beginning to piss [me]0-i off now . “ [We]3091-us ’ll have two , please . ”[321-a guy] “ What do [you]0-i like about rom - coms ? ”[321-a guy] [he]321-a guy asks as [he]321-a guy keeps [his]321-a guy eyes on the screen in front of [him]321-a guy . “ Men who do n’t talk during movies , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper into [my]0-i champagne glass . [He]321-a guy smiles broadly to [himself]321-a guy . “ What do [you]321-a guy like about . . . ”[321-a guy] [I]0-i pause because [I]0-i do n’t even know what [Lincoln]7-lincoln is about . “ Political films ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ The fact that they ’re boring as all hell ? ”[0-i] “ [I]321-a guy just like true stories , regardless of what they are . ”[321-a guy] “ So do [I]0-i , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply . “ That ’s why [I]0-i like romance . Love is true . ”[0-i] [He]321-a guy chuckles into [his]321-a guy glass as if amused . [I]0-i glance over at [him]321-a guy . “ What does that mean ? ”[0-i] “ Rom - coms are as far from reality as [you]0-i can get . [I]321-a guy bet [you]321-a guy ’re the type who reads trashy romance novels too . ”[321-a guy] [I]0-i stare at [him]321-a guy flatly . [I]0-i think [I]0-i hate [this man]327-this man . “ [I]0-i am , actually . . . and if [you]0-i must know , [I]0-i ’m watching [Magic Mike XXL]96-michael after this so [I]0-i can watch [gorgeous men]3092-gorgeous men take [their]3092-gorgeous men clothes off . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sip [my]0-i champagne in annoyance . “ And [I]0-i ’ll smile through the whole damn thing , regardless of [your]321-a guy snooty judgment . ”[0-i] [He]321-a guy laughs out loud , and it ’s deep and strong and does things to [my]0-i stomach . [I]0-i put [my]0-i headphones back on and pretend to focus on [my]0-i screen . [I]0-i ca n’t , though , because [I]0-i just totally embarrassed [myself]0-i , and [I]0-i can feel [myself]0-i blushing . Stop talking . Two hours later , [I]0-i sit and stare out the window . [My]0-i movie is over , but [his]321-a guy scent is not . It ’s surrounding [me]0-i , taunting [me]0-i with things that [I]0-i should n’t be thinking about . How does [he]321-a guy smell so good ? Unsure what to do without seeming awkward , [I]0-i decide [I]0-i ’ll take a nap , try to sleep through the next few hours , but first [I]0-i need to go to [the bathroom]328-the bathroom . [I]0-i stand . “ Excuse [me]321-a guy . ”[321-a guy] [He]321-a guy moves [his]321-a guy legs a little but not enough for [me]0-i to fit through , and [I]0-i have to lean over [him]321-a guy to get past . [I]0-i stumble and fall and put [my]0-i hand on [his]321-a guy thigh ; it ’s large and hard to [my]0-i touch . “ [I]0-i ’m so sorry , ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer , embarrassed . “ That ’s fine . ”[0-i] [He]321-a guy smirks up at [me]0-i . “ More than fine . ”[321-a guy] [I]0-i stare at [him]321-a guy for a moment . Huh ? “ There ’s a method to [my]0-i madness . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . What does that mean ? [I]0-i make [my]0-i way past [him]321-a guy and go to [the bathroom]328-the bathroom , and then [I]0-i walk around and stretch [my]0-i legs a little as [I]0-i ponder that statement . [I]0-i ’m stumped — [I’ve]0-i got nothing . “ What did [you]321-a guy mean by that ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask as [I]0-i fall back into [my]0-i seat . “ Nothing . ”[0-i] “ Did [you]0-i give [me]321-a guy the window seat so [I]321-a guy would have to climb over [you]0-i ? ”[321-a guy] [He]321-a guy tilts [his]321-a guy head to the side . “ No , [I]321-a guy gave [you]0-i the window seat because [you]0-i wanted it . Climbing over [me]321-a guy was just an added bonus . ”[321-a guy] [I]0-i stare at [him]321-a guy as [I]0-i struggle to respond . Am [I]0-i imagining this ? [Older rich guys]330-older rich guys do n’t usually speak to [me]0-i like this . . . at all . “ Are [you]321-a guy flirting with [me]0-i , [Jim]90-jim ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . [He]321-a guy gives [me]0-i a slow , sexy smile . “ [I]321-a guy do n’t know . Am [I]321-a guy ? ”[321-a guy] “ [I]321-a guy asked [you]0-i first , and do n’t answer [my]321-a guy question with a question . ”[321-a guy] [He]321-a guy smirks as [he]321-a guy turns [his]321-a guy attention back to the television screen . “ This is probably where [you]0-i should start flirting back . . . [Emily]91-emily . ”[321-a guy] [I]0-i feel [my]0-i cheeks flush with embarrassment as [I]0-i try to hide [my]0-i stupid smile . “ [I]0-i do n’t flirt . [I]0-i either want [a man]3093-a man or [I]0-i do n’t , ”[0-i] [I]0-i announce . “ Is that so ? ”[321-a guy] [he]321-a guy says as if fascinated . “ And how long after [you]0-i meet [a man]3093-a man do [you]0-i make that decision ? ”[321-a guy] “ Instantaneously , ”[0-i] [I]0-i lie . That ’s not true , but [I]0-i ’ll pretend . Faking confidence is [my]0-i superpower . “ Really ? ”[321-a guy] [he]321-a guy whispers as [the flight attendant]297-the flight attendant walks past [us]332-us . “ Excuse [me]321-a guy , can [we]332-us have two more champagnes , please ? ”[321-a guy] [he]321-a guy asks [her]297-the flight attendant . “ Of course , [sir]3064-sir . ”[297-the flight attendant] [His]321-a guy eyes come back to meet [mine]0-i . “ Well , do tell . What was [your]321-a guy first impression of [me]321-a guy ? ”[321-a guy] [I]0-i pretend to look around for [Jessica]89-jessica [the flight attendant]297-the flight attendant . “ [You]321-a guy may need something stronger to drink to hear this , [Jim]90-jim . [You]321-a guy ’re not going to like it . ”[0-i] [He]321-a guy laughs out loud , and [I]0-i find [myself]0-i smiling broadly as [I]0-i watch [him]321-a guy . “ What ’s funny ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [You]321-a guy are . ”[0-i] “ Why am [I]0-i funny ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ This sense of righteousness that [you]321-a guy have . ”[0-i] “ Oh , like [you]321-a guy do n’t have that too . . . Mr. [I]334-i ’ll Have Two Champagnes . ”[334-i] [Our]334-i drinks arrive , and [he]321-a guy smiles as [he]321-a guy passes [mine]335-mine to [me]0-i . [His]321-a guy eyes linger on [my]0-i face as [he]321-a guy takes a sip . “ What were [you]321-a guy doing in [London]8-london ? ”[321-a guy] “ Ugh . ”[0-i] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . “ [I]0-i flew over for [a friend]3096-a friend ’s wedding , and to be honest , [I]0-i wish [I]0-i had n’t gone . ”[0-i] “ Why not ? ”[321-a guy] “ [[My]321-a guy ex]315-my ex was there with [his]315-my ex new squeeze , and [he]315-my ex was being over - the - top affectionate with [her]315-my ex to piss [me]321-a guy off . ”[321-a guy] “ Which worked , obviously , ”[321-a guy] [he]321-a guy adds as [he]321-a guy tilts [his]321-a guy glass toward [me]0-i . “ Hmm . ”[321-a guy] [I]0-i sip [my]0-i drink in disgust . “ Just a little . ”[0-i] “ What did [she]315-my ex look like ? ”[321-a guy] “ Long bleached - blonde hair and huge silicone lips and boobs and eyelashes and fake tan and everything [I]321-a guy ’m not . ”[321-a guy] “ Hmm . ”[321-a guy] [He]321-a guy listens intently . “ Like [Backseat Barbie]100-backseat barbie on crack . ”[321-a guy] [He]321-a guy chuckles . “ [Everyone]3098-everyone loves [a Backseat Barbie]3099-a backseat barbie . ”[321-a guy] [I]0-i look over at [him]321-a guy in disgust . “ This is probably where [you]321-a guy should tell [me]321-a guy that [all men]3100-all men hate [Backseat Barbies]101-backseat barbies , [Jim]90-jim . Do n’t [you]321-a guy know anything about polite plane - conversation etiquette ? ”[321-a guy] “ Obviously not . ”[321-a guy] [He]321-a guy frowns as [he]321-a guy considers [my]0-i statement . “ Why would [I]321-a guy do that ? ”[321-a guy] [I]0-i widen [my]0-i eyes to accentuate [my]0-i point . “ To be nice . ”[0-i] “ Oh , right . ”[321-a guy] [He]321-a guy frowns as if bracing [himself]321-a guy to lie . “ [Emily]91-emily . . . [all men]3100-all men are repulsed by Backseat Barbies . ”[321-a guy] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i tip [my]0-i glass to [him]321-a guy . “ Thank [you]321-a guy , [Jim]90-jim . ”[0-i] “ Although . . . ”[321-a guy] [He]321-a guy pauses for a moment . “ If [they]3102-they give good head . . . ”[321-a guy] What the hell ? [I]0-i snort [my]0-i champagne up [my]0-i nose and choke . That ’s the last thing [I]0-i ever expected to hear come out of [his]321-a guy mouth . “ [Jim]90-jim , ”[0-i] [I]0-i splutter as it sprays everywhere . [He]321-a guy laughs as [he]321-a guy grabs [his]321-a guy napkins and hands them over , and [I]0-i wipe the drink dribbling from [my]0-i chin . “ Men who look like [you]321-a guy are not supposed to talk about head . ”[0-i] [I]0-i cough . “ Why not ? ”[321-a guy] [he]321-a guy asks incredulously . “ And what do [you]321-a guy mean , men who look like [me]321-a guy ? ”[321-a guy] “ All serious and stuff . ”[321-a guy] [He]321-a guy looks at [me]0-i deadpan . “ Define stuff . ”[321-a guy] “ [You]0-i know , older , rich , and bossy . ”[321-a guy] [His]321-a guy eyes dance with delight . “ And what gives [you]0-i the impression that [I]321-a guy ’m rich and bossy ? ”[321-a guy] [I]0-i exhale in an overexaggerated way . “ [You]321-a guy look rich . ”[0-i] “ How do [I]321-a guy ? ”[321-a guy] “ [Your]321-a guy fancy watch . The cut of [your]321-a guy shirt . ”[0-i] [I]0-i glance down at [his]321-a guy shoes . “ [I]0-i ’ve never seen shoes like that before . Where did [you]321-a guy even get those ? ”[0-i] “ In [a shop]3103-a shop , [Emily]91-emily . ”[321-a guy] [He]321-a guy looks at [his]321-a guy watch . “ And [I]321-a guy ’ll have [you]0-i know that this watch was a gift from [a girlfriend]3104-a girlfriend . ”[321-a guy] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . “ [I]0-i bet [she]3104-a girlfriend ’s [a vegan yoga nut]3105-a vegan yoga nut . ”[0-i] [He]321-a guy smirks . “ [I]321-a guy know [[your]0-i type of woman]3106-your type of woman . ”[321-a guy] “ Really . ”[321-a guy] [He]321-a guy leans closer . “ Please go on — this character analysis is fascinating . ”[321-a guy] [I]0-i smile as a little voice from [my]0-i subconscious screams , Stop drinking , [fool]336-fool ! “ [I]321-a guy ’m assuming [you]321-a guy live in [New York]3-new york . ”[321-a guy] “ Correct . ”[321-a guy] “ In [an apartment]3107-an apartment . ”[321-a guy] “ Affirmative . ”[321-a guy] “ [You]321-a guy probably work at [some ritzy company]3108-some ritzy company . ”[321-a guy] [He]321-a guy smiles ; [he]321-a guy likes this game . “ Perhaps . ”[321-a guy] “ [You]321-a guy would have [a girlfriend]3104-a girlfriend or . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i glance down . “ [You]321-a guy do n’t wear a wedding ring . . . so perhaps [you]321-a guy cheat on [[your]321-a guy wife]3110-your wife when [you]321-a guy travel for work ? ”[321-a guy] [He]321-a guy chuckles . “ [You]321-a guy really should make a profession out of this . [I]321-a guy ’m amazed at the accuracy . ”[321-a guy] [I]0-i like this game too ; [I]0-i smile broadly . “ What do [you]321-a guy think about [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ What was [your]321-a guy first impression when [I]0-i walked onto [the plane]291-the plane ? ”[0-i] “ Well . ”[321-a guy] [He]321-a guy frowns as [he]321-a guy considers the question . “ Do [you]0-i want the politically correct version ? ”[321-a guy] “ No . [I]0-i want the truth . ”[0-i] “ Right . . . well , in that case , [I]0-i noticed [your]321-a guy long legs and the curve of [your]321-a guy neck . The dimple in [your]321-a guy chin . [You]321-a guy are [the most attractive woman [I]0-i ’ve seen]3112-the most attractive woman i ’ve seen in a long time , and when [you]321-a guy smiled , it brought [me]0-i to [my]0-i feet . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile softly as the air swirls between [us]337-us . “ And then [you]321-a guy spoke . . . and ruined everything . ”[0-i] What ? [I]0-i burst out laughing . “ [I]0-i ruined everything ? How did [I]0-i ruin everything ? ”[0-i] “ [You]321-a guy ’re bossy , with a sarcastic snark . ”[0-i] “ What ’s the problem with that ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer in outrage . “ Well , [I]338-he ’m bossy and sarcastic . ”[338-he] [He]338-he shrugs . “ And ? ”[338-he] “ And [I]0-i do n’t want to date [myself]0-i . [I]0-i like [sweet , demure girls]3113-sweet , demure girls , [the ones who do what [I]0-i say]3114-the ones who do what i say . ”[0-i] “ Ugh . ”[0-i] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . “ [The ones who clean [the house]3072-the house and have sex on Saturdays]3115-the ones who clean the house and have sex on saturdays . ”[0-i] “ Precisely . ”[0-i] [I]0-i laugh and hold [my]0-i glass up to clink with [his]338-he . “ [You]321-a guy ’re not bad for [a boring old guy with weird shoes]3117-a boring old guy with weird shoes . ”[338-he] [He]338-he laughs . “ And [you]321-a guy ’re not bad for [a young , hot smart - ass]3118-a young , hot smart - ass . ”[338-he] “ Do [you]338-he want to watch [Magic Mike XXL]96-michael with [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [I]0-i suppose , although [I]0-i should let [you]338-he know . . . [I]0-i am [an ex - stripper]3119-an ex - stripper [myself]0-i , so this is nothing new for [me]0-i . ”[0-i] “ Really ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i try to hide [my]0-i smile . “ [You]327-this man ’re good on a pole ? ”[0-i] [His]338-he eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ [My]338-he pole work is the best in [the country]3120-the country . ”[338-he] The air crackles between [us]339-us , and [I]0-i have to concentrate on stopping [my]0-i inebriated mouth from saying something slutty . [He]338-he pushes the screen and taps through to Magic Mike XXL . . . and [I]0-i smile broadly . [This man]327-this man is so unexpected . First class is definitely the way to fly . Six hours later “ Okay , next question . The weirdest place [you]0-i ’ve ever had sex ? ”[338-he] [he]338-he whispers . [I]0-i smirk . “ [You]338-he ca n’t ask [me]0-i that . ”[0-i] “ Yes , [I]338-he can . [I]338-he just did . ”[338-he] “ It ’s rude . ”[0-i] “ Says who ? ”[338-he] [He]338-he looks around . “ It ’s just a question , and [nobody]3121-nobody is listening . ”[338-he] [Jim]90-jim and [I]0-i have talked and whispered and laughed [our]339-us way through the entire flight . “ Hmm . ”[0-i] [I]0-i think out loud . “ That ’s a tough one . ”[0-i] “ Why ? ”[338-he] “ [I]0-i ’m on a bit of a drought at the moment . [I]0-i can hardly remember any sex . ”[0-i] “ How long ? ”[338-he] [He]338-he frowns . “ Oh . ”[338-he] [I]0-i look to the ceiling as [I]0-i think . “ [I]0-i have n’t had sex in like . . . eighteen months . ”[0-i] [His]338-he face falls in horror . “ What ? ”[0-i] “ It ’s lame , is n’t it ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i wince . “ Very . [You]0-i need to up [your]0-i game . They ’re very bad statistics , indeed . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i know . ”[0-i] [I]0-i giggle . [Boy]102-boy . . . [we]339-us ’re so tipsy . “ Why am [I]0-i telling [you]338-he all this stuff ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [You]338-he ’re just [some random guy [I]0-i met on [a plane]3123-a plane]3122-some random guy i met on a plane . ”[0-i] “ [Who happens to be very interested in the subject]3124-who happens to be very interested in the subject . ”[341-the flight attendants] “ Why is that ? ”[338-he] [He]338-he leans in and whispers to [me]0-i so that [the flight attendants]341-the flight attendants ca n’t hear [us]339-us . “ [I]338-he do n’t understand how someone as hot as [you]0-i does n’t get fucked three times a day . ”[338-he] [I]0-i stare at [him]338-he as [I]0-i feel a tingle all the way to [my]0-i toes . Stop it . [This guy]289-this guy is too old for [me]0-i and so not [[my]0-i type]343-my type . [His]338-he eyes drop to [my]0-i lips , and the air between [us]339-us zaps with electricity . “ How long are [you]0-i in [New York]3-new york ? ”[338-he] [he]338-he asks . [I]0-i watch [his]338-he tongue dart out and lick [his]338-he bottom lip in slow motion . [I]0-i can almost feel it between [my]0-i . . . “ Just the afternoon . [I]0-i have [my]0-i interview at six tonight , and then [I]0-i catch the last flight out , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Can [you]338-he change [your]338-he flight ? ”[0-i] Why ? “ No . ”[338-he] [He]338-he smirks as [he]338-he watches [me]0-i , and it ’s obvious [he]338-he ’s imagining something . “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ [I]0-i wish [we]3125-we were on [a private jet]3126-a private jet . ”[0-i] “ Why is that ? ”[338-he] [His]338-he eyes drop to [my]0-i lips once more . “ Because [I]338-he ’d break that drought of [yours]0-i and initiate [you]0-i into the [Miles - High Club]9-miles - high club . ”[338-he] [I]0-i get a visual of climbing on top of [him]338-he , right here , right now . “ It ’s [Mile - High Club]10-mile - high club . . . not [Miles]103-miles media , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ No . . . it ’s [Miles]103-miles media . ”[0-i] [He]338-he smirks as [his]338-he eyes darken . “ Trust [me]338-he — it ’s [Miles]103-miles media . ”[338-he] Something inside [me]0-i snaps , and suddenly [I]0-i want to say something crazy and out of the ordinary . [I]0-i lean forward and whisper in [his]338-he ear , “ [You]338-he know , [I]0-i ’ve never fucked [a stranger]3127-a stranger before . ”[0-i] [He]338-he inhales sharply as [his]338-he eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ Do [you]0-i want to fuck [a stranger]3127-a stranger ? ”[338-he] [he]338-he murmurs as arousal thrums between [us]344-us . [I]0-i stare at [him]338-he . This is so out of character for [me]0-i . [This man]327-this man makes [me]0-i . . . “ Do n’t be shy , ”[338-he] [he]338-he whispers . “ Tell [me]338-he , if [we]344-us were alone right now . . . ”[338-he] [He]338-he pauses as [he]338-he chooses [his]338-he words . “ What would [you]0-i give [me]338-he , [Emily]91-emily ? ”[338-he] [My]0-i eyes search [his]338-he , and maybe it ’s the alcohol or the lack of sex or the fact that [I]0-i know [I]0-i ’ll never see [him]338-he again . . . or perhaps [I]0-i ’m just [a total ho]346-a total ho . “ [Me]0-i , ”[0-i] [I]0-i breathe . “ [I]0-i would give [you]338-he [me]0-i . ”[0-i] [Our]347-we eyes lock , and as if forgetting where [we]347-we are , [he]338-he leans forward and cups [my]0-i face in [his]338-he hand . [His]338-he eyes are so blue , and a wave of arousal sweeps through [me]0-i at [his]338-he touch . [I]0-i want [this man]327-this man . [I]0-i want all of [this man]327-this man . . . every last drop . “ Hot towel ? ”[89-jessica] [Jessica]89-jessica [the flight attendant]297-the flight attendant asks . [We]347-we jump back from [each other]351-each other , embarrassed . What must [they]352-they think of [us]347-we ? [They]352-they ’ve been watching [us]347-we flirt shamelessly for the entire trip . “ Thank [you]297-the flight attendant , ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer as [I]0-i take the towel from [her]297-the flight attendant . “ There ’s a snowstorm in [New York]3-new york , and [we]347-we ’re going to circle for a while to see if [we]347-we can land , ”[297-the flight attendant] [she]297-the flight attendant says . “ What happens if [we]347-we ca n’t ? ”[90-jim] [Jim]90-jim asks . “ [We]347-we will fly on to [Boston]11-boston and have an emergency layover for the night . [You]297-the flight attendant will be accommodated in [a hotel]3129-a hotel , of course . [We]347-we ’ll know in the next ten minutes . [I]90-jim ’ll keep [you]297-the flight attendant updated . ”[90-jim] “ Thank [you]90-jim . ”[297-the flight attendant] [She]297-the flight attendant walks off to the other side of [the plane]291-the plane and out of earshot , and [Jim]90-jim leans over and whispers , “ [I]90-jim hope [New York]3-new york freezes the fuck over . ”[90-jim] Nerves dance in [my]0-i stomach . “ Why is that ? ”[90-jim] “ [I]90-jim have plans for [us]3130-us , ”[90-jim] [he]90-jim whispers darkly . [I]0-i stare at [him]90-jim as [my]0-i brain misfires . [I]0-i ’ve been prick teasing like [a pro]354-a pro , but [I]0-i ’m really [not that kind of girl]355-not that kind of girl . It ’s easy to be brave and slutty when there ’s no chance of anything happening . [I]0-i begin to perspire . Why did [I]0-i get so damn tipsy ? Why did [I]0-i tell [him]90-jim about [my]0-i drought ? That ’s supposed to be kept private , [fool]336-fool . “ Another drink ? ”[90-jim] [Jim]90-jim whispers . “ [I]90-jim can’t — [I]90-jim have a job interview this afternoon . ”[90-jim] “ That wo n’t be happening . ”[90-jim] “ Do n’t say that , ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . “ [I]0-i want this job . ”[0-i] “ Good evening , [passengers]3131-passengers ; this is [the captain speaking]3132-the captain speaking . ”[90-jim] A voice comes over the loudspeaker , and [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes . Shit . “ Due to a snowstorm in [New York]3-new york , [we]3133-we will be flying on to [Boston]11-boston tonight and staying [there]3073-there . [We]3133-we will return to [New York]3-new york early in the morning . Sorry for any inconvenience this has caused , but safety is [our]3133-we priority . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes meet [Jim]90-jim ’s , and [he]90-jim gives [me]0-i a slow and sexy smile and raises [his]90-jim eyebrow . Oh no . Chapter 2 “ Do n’t look so excited . ”[90-jim] [He]90-jim smirks . “ [Jim]90-jim . . . , ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . Oh hell , how do [I]0-i say this ? “ [I]0-i ’m not really the kind of girl who . . . ”[0-i] [My]0-i voice trails off . “ Who fucks on first dates ? ”[90-jim] [he]90-jim says , finishing [my]0-i sentence . “ Yes . ”[90-jim] [I]0-i wince at the crudeness of that statement . “ [I]0-i just do n’t want [you]90-jim to think . . . ”[0-i] “ [I]90-jim know . [I]90-jim would n’t , ”[90-jim] [he]90-jim replies curtly . “ [I]90-jim do n’t . ”[90-jim] “ Good . ”[0-i] Relief fills [me]0-i . “ [I]90-jim was being flirty when [I]90-jim thought [we]3135-we were getting off and never seeing [each other]351-each other again . ”[90-jim] “ Right . ”[90-jim] [He]90-jim smirks in amusement . “ Not that [I]0-i do n’t think [you]90-jim ’re great , ”[0-i] [I]0-i add . “ Because if [I]0-i were [that kind of girl]3137-that kind of girl , [I]0-i would totally be into [you]90-jim . [We]3135-we would be fucking like . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause as [I]0-i try to think of an analogy . “ [Rabbits]104-rabbits ? ”[90-jim] [he]90-jim offers . “ Yes . ”[90-jim] [He]90-jim holds both hands in the air . “ [I]90-jim understand ; platonic humans only . ”[90-jim] [I]0-i smile broadly . “ [I]0-i ’m so glad [you]90-jim understand . ”[0-i] Seven hours later [He]90-jim slams [me]0-i up against the wall as [he]90-jim struggles to pull [my]0-i skirt up over [my]0-i hips , and [his]90-jim open mouth ravages [my]0-i neck . “ Door , ”[0-i] [I]0-i pant . “ Open the damn door . ”[0-i] Oh God . . . [I]0-i ’ve never felt this chemistry with [anyone]295-anyone before . [We]358-we ’ve laughed and danced and kissed [our]358-we way around [Boston]11-boston , and somehow [he]90-jim makes [me]0-i feel at ease . It ’s as if [I]0-i do this type of thing every day , and it ’s completely natural . The weird thing is , it feels right . The spontaneity of the situation [I]0-i find [myself]0-i in has [me]0-i feeling all brave . [This man]327-this man is witty and funny and dirty as all hell , and in [my]0-i opinion — which , in truth , could be totally screwed over with alcohol consumption at the moment — [he]327-this man ’s worth the risk . . . because [I]0-i know [I]0-i will never get the opportunity to be with [a man like [him]327-this man]360-a man like him again . [I]0-i ’ve died and gone to layover bad - girl heaven . [Jim]90-jim fumbles with the key , and [we]358-we stumble into [[my]0-i room]361-my room . Then [he]90-jim throws [me]0-i onto the bed . [My]0-i chest rises and falls as [we]358-we stare at [each other]351-each other , and the air between crackles with electricity . “ [I]0-i ’m not [this kind of girl]3138-this kind of girl , ”[0-i] [I]0-i remind [him]90-jim . “ [I]90-jim know , ”[90-jim] [he]90-jim breathes . “ [I]90-jim would n’t want to corrupt [you]0-i . ”[90-jim] “ But there is a drought , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ So . . . so dry . ”[0-i] [He]90-jim raises [his]90-jim eyebrows as [he]90-jim pants along with [me]0-i . “ This is true . ”[90-jim] [I]0-i stare at [him]90-jim for a moment as [I]0-i try to clear [my]0-i arousal fog . [My]0-i sex is throbbing and pleading for [his]90-jim body . “ It would be a shame to . . . ”[0-i] [My]0-i voice trails off . “ [I]0-i know . ”[0-i] [He]90-jim licks [his]90-jim lips in appreciation as [his]90-jim eyes roam over [my]0-i body . “ Such a fucking shame . ”[90-jim] [He]90-jim takes [his]90-jim shirt off over [his]90-jim shoulders , and [my]0-i breath catches . [He]90-jim has a broad , muscular chest with olive skin and a scattering of hair that runs from [his]90-jim navel and disappears down into [his]90-jim pants . [His]90-jim hair is dark , and [his]90-jim eyes are a brilliant blue — but it ’s the power behind them that has [me]0-i aching for [him]90-jim to take [me]0-i . There ’s an edge to [his]90-jim touch that [I]0-i ’ve never felt before . [He]90-jim ’s all male and pure domination . There ’s no mistaking who ’s in charge here . Something about [this man]327-this man has opened up another side of [me]0-i that [I]0-i did n’t know existed . [I]0-i know [he]90-jim could have [any woman in [the world]268-the world [he]90-jim wants]364-any woman in the world he wants . And at this moment , [he]90-jim wants [me]0-i . There ’s no denying the chemistry between [us]366-us ; it ’s raw , honest , and all - consuming . [He]90-jim ’s hardly touched [me]0-i , and [I]0-i already know that this night is special . Maybe fate has dealt [me]0-i an ace for a change . With [his]90-jim eyes locked on [mine]0-i and in slow motion , [he]90-jim unzips [his]90-jim pants and pulls [his]90-jim dick out . It ’s big and hard , and [my]0-i chest rises and falls as [I]0-i watch [him]90-jim . [My]0-i heart is in overdrive . Is this really happening ? Oh . [My]0-i . God . [He]90-jim begins to slowly stroke [himself]90-jim , and [my]0-i mouth falls open as [I]0-i stare , transfixed . [I]0-i ’ve never had [a man]3093-a man touch [himself]90-jim in front of [me]0-i before . Holy fucking shit . This is off the hook . [He]90-jim lifts one of [his]90-jim feet to the bed and really begins to let [himself]90-jim have it . The muscles in [his]90-jim shoulders and arms flex as [he]90-jim jerks [himself]90-jim hard , and [my]0-i insides ripple in pleasure as [I]0-i imagine it ’s [me]0-i doing it for [him]90-jim . This is like reality porn . . . only ten times better . What the hell am [I]0-i doing [here]275-here ? [I]0-i ’m [a good girl]369-a good girl , and [good girls]370-good girls do n’t do bad things with [men like this]371-men like this . [We]372-we do n’t know [the same people]373-the same people , [we]372-we do n’t live in [the same city]374-the same city , and [I]0-i may never see [him]90-jim again , and there ’s an unexpected freedom in that . [I]0-i can be different . Whoever [he]90-jim wants [me]0-i to be . [His]90-jim eyes are locked on [mine]0-i , and [his]90-jim jaw clenches . “ Get over here and suck [my]90-jim cock , [Emily]91-emily , ”[90-jim] [he]90-jim murmurs darkly . God , yes . [I]0-i thought [he]90-jim ’d never ask . [I]0-i scurry to [my]0-i knees , desperate to please [him]90-jim . [I]0-i do n’t know anything about [this guy]289-this guy , but [I]0-i do know that at this moment , [I]0-i want to be the best sex [he]90-jim ’s ever had . [I]0-i take [him]90-jim in [my]0-i mouth as [I]0-i pretend to be [the deep - throat champion of [the world]268-the world]376-the deep - throat champion of the world . [I]0-i fist [him]90-jim hard as [my]0-i hand follows [my]0-i lips . It ’s been so long , and [I]0-i feel [my]0-i sex clench , [my]0-i orgasm close just from the taste of [his]90-jim preejaculate . “ Fuck . . . so good , ”[0-i] [I]0-i murmur around [him]90-jim . “ The taste of [you]90-jim is going to make [me]0-i come . ”[0-i] [He]90-jim tips [his]90-jim head back to the sky and closes [his]90-jim eyes . “ Naked . [I]90-jim need [you]0-i fucking naked , ”[90-jim] [he]90-jim growls with urgency . [He]90-jim drags [me]0-i off the bed and in one moment has [my]0-i skirt and panties on the floor . [He]90-jim pulls [my]0-i shirt off over [my]0-i head and throws [my]0-i bra to the side . Then [he]90-jim stops still . . . and in slow motion , with [his]90-jim hands clenched by [his]90-jim sides , [his]90-jim eyes drop down [my]0-i body . [He]90-jim drinks [me]0-i in , and [I]0-i feel the heat as [his]90-jim gaze skims [my]0-i skin . [My]0-i world stops spinning , and [I]0-i stand before [him]90-jim naked and vulnerable , waiting for [his]90-jim approval . This is new for [me]0-i . [I]0-i ’ve never been with [a man who ’s so dominant and commanding]378-a man who ’s so dominant and commanding . [His]90-jim eyes , [his]90-jim voice , [his]90-jim every touch reminds [me]0-i of who [I]0-i am with and how much [his]90-jim pleasure means to [me]0-i . [I]0-i feel like [I]0-i want to rise to the challenge , and the primal urge to satisfy [him]90-jim is taking [me]0-i over . When [his]90-jim eyes meet [mine]0-i again , they ’re blazing with desire . An undercurrent of darkness and tenderness runs between [us]379-us . Perhaps [I]0-i ’ve forgotten how [a man]3093-a man looks at [a woman]381-a woman when every ounce of [his]3093-a man being wants [her]381-a woman . Because [I]0-i swear to [God]88-god , [I]0-i ’ve never seen this look before in [my]0-i life . “ On [your]0-i back , ”[90-jim] [he]90-jim murmurs . [My]0-i face falls in fear . [He]90-jim takes [me]0-i in [his]90-jim arms and kisses [me]0-i deeply as [he]90-jim holds [my]0-i face in [his]90-jim hands . “ What is it ? ”[90-jim] [he]90-jim breathes . “ It ’s . . . it ’s been a long time , ”[90-jim] [I]0-i pant . “ [I]90-jim ’ll take care of [you]0-i , [baby]3139-baby , ”[90-jim] [he]90-jim whispers softly , which eases [my]0-i fears . [His]90-jim mouth takes [mine]0-i , [his]90-jim tongue slowly sliding through [my]0-i open lips with just the right amount of suction . [My]0-i knees nearly buckle underneath [me]0-i . [He]90-jim lays [me]0-i down and spreads [my]0-i legs and smiles darkly as [he]90-jim kisses [his]90-jim way down [my]0-i body . [I]0-i stare at the ceiling as [I]0-i try to control [my]0-i erratic breathing ; no amount of alcohol could have prepared [me]0-i for this . [He]90-jim lifts [my]0-i legs and puts [my]0-i feet onto [his]90-jim strong shoulders and then drops [my]0-i knees wide . [I]0-i am completely open for [him]90-jim , and [he]90-jim takes [me]0-i with no reservations and sucks hard . [I]0-i buck off the bed . “ Ah ! ”[0-i] [I]0-i cry . But [he]90-jim gives [me]0-i no mercy as [he]90-jim drives three of [his]90-jim thick fingers into [my]0-i sex and begins to pump [me]0-i hard . Shit . . . ca n’t [we]382-we ease into it , at least ? [His]90-jim tongue is on [my]0-i clitoris , and [his]90-jim fingers are on [my]0-i G - spot . What the actual hell is going on here ? [My]0-i body begins to quiver like a puppet . . . [[his]90-jim puppet]383-his puppet . [The man]265-the man ’s [a god]385-a god . [My]0-i legs lift off [his]90-jim shoulders by themselves , and [I]0-i convulse as a freight train of an orgasm rips through [me]0-i . That took approximately five seconds . Oh hell . How embarrassing . Way to act cool . [He]90-jim chuckles as if [he]90-jim ’s proud , and [I]0-i throw the back of [my]0-i forearm over [my]0-i eyes to hide [my]0-i face in shame . [He]90-jim pulls [my]0-i arm away and takes [my]0-i jaw in [his]90-jim hand and drags [my]0-i face back to [his]90-jim . “ Do n’t hide from [me]90-jim , [Emily]91-emily . Not ever , ”[90-jim] [he]90-jim commands . [My]0-i eyes search [his]90-jim . This is too full on . . . too much . [This guy]289-this guy is too intense . “ Answer [me]289-this guy . ”[289-this guy] “ What do [you]90-jim want [me]0-i to say ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Say yes so that [I]0-i know [you]90-jim understand . ”[0-i] The air crackles between [us]387-us . “ Yes , ”[0-i] [I]0-i breathe . “ [I]0-i understand . ”[0-i] “ [Good girl]3140-good girl , ”[90-jim] [he]90-jim whispers as [he]90-jim leans in and kisses [me]0-i again . [His]90-jim tongue is soft stroking perfection , and [my]0-i legs open by themselves once more . [He]90-jim gets up and takes four condoms from [his]90-jim wallet , opens one , and hands it to [me]0-i . “ Put it on [me]0-i . ”[0-i] [I]0-i take it from [him]90-jim and bend to kiss [him]90-jim softly on [his]90-jim dick before [I]0-i roll the condom on . “ [You]90-jim ’re very bossy . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk . [He]90-jim smiles broadly as [he]90-jim falls onto [his]90-jim back , pulls [me]0-i over [him]90-jim , and drags [my]0-i face to [his]90-jim . “ [You]0-i ’ll fuck [me]90-jim first , ”[90-jim] [he]90-jim murmurs against [my]0-i lips , “ and then [I]90-jim ’ll fuck [you]0-i when [you]0-i ’re warmed up . ”[90-jim] [I]0-i smile against [his]90-jim mouth . “ [I]90-jim only fuck once , [big boy]3141-big boy , and then [I]90-jim fall asleep . ”[90-jim] [He]90-jim gives [me]0-i a slow , sexy smile . [I]0-i straddle [his]90-jim large body as [our]388-our kisses become desperate . [His]90-jim thick cock is up against [his]90-jim stomach , and [he]90-jim holds it in the air and guides [my]0-i hips down over [him]90-jim . Oh , the burn — [he]90-jim ’s big . “ Ow , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whimper . “ It ’s okay , ”[90-jim] [he]90-jim whispers . “ Wiggle from side to side . ”[90-jim] [He]90-jim cups [my]0-i breasts in [his]90-jim hands as [he]90-jim stares up at [me]0-i in what seems like awe . [I]0-i smile down at [him]90-jim . “ What ? ”[0-i] “ From the moment [I]0-i saw [you]90-jim on [the plane]291-the plane today , [I]0-i wanted [you]90-jim riding [my]0-i cock . ”[0-i] [I]0-i giggle down at [him]90-jim . “ Do [you]90-jim always get what [you]90-jim want ? ”[0-i] “ Always . ”[90-jim] [He]90-jim grabs [my]0-i hips and slams [me]0-i down , and [our]389-our mouths fall open in pleasure . Oh . . . [he]90-jim ’s . . . “ So fucking tight , ”[90-jim] [he]90-jim grinds out . With [our]389-our eyes locked , [he]90-jim slowly moves [me]0-i up and down , and [I]0-i can feel every vein on [his]90-jim thick shaft . [His]90-jim eyes are hooded as [he]90-jim looks up at [me]0-i , and [I]0-i lean forward and kiss [him]90-jim softly . “ Do [you]90-jim know how perfect [you]90-jim feel inside [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper , and then [I]0-i lick [his]90-jim open mouth . [His]90-jim eyes roll back in [his]90-jim head . “ [You]0-i are one hot fuck . ”[90-jim] [He]90-jim picks [me]0-i up by the hip bones and slams [me]0-i back down on [his]90-jim cock , and [I]0-i laugh out loud at the overwhelming sensation of being filled to the hilt . “ God , fill [me]0-i up , ”[0-i] [I]0-i moan . “ Give it to [me]0-i , ”[0-i] [I]0-i beg . [I]0-i love how [he]90-jim ’s losing control . It ’s making [me]0-i crazy . And then as if in some kind of alternate universe , [my]0-i mouth latches on to [his]90-jim neck , and [I]0-i suck hard as [I]0-i ride [him]90-jim . [He]90-jim hisses , and as if [he]90-jim ’s completely losing control , [he]90-jim bucks [me]0-i off and pulls out and throws [me]0-i onto [my]0-i back . [He]90-jim lifts [my]0-i legs over [his]90-jim shoulders and slams in deep — so deep that the air is knocked from [my]0-i lungs . [I]0-i smile . So [he]90-jim likes dirty talk , does [he]90-jim ? Well , that just happens to be [my]0-i specialty . Game on . [I]0-i hold [his]90-jim face in [my]0-i hands . “ God , [you]90-jim ’ve got a beautiful cock , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Is it weeping for [me]0-i , [baby]3139-baby ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i clench around [him]90-jim . “ [I]0-i can feel [your]90-jim pulse in it . ”[0-i] [He]90-jim gives [me]0-i a slow , sexy smile as [he]90-jim pumps [me]0-i . “ [I]90-jim ’m going to rip this condom off and blow in [your]90-jim dirty mouth in a minute . ”[90-jim] “ Please . ”[0-i] [I]0-i laugh as [he]90-jim pumps [me]0-i hard , and in a moment of perfect clarity , [he]90-jim turns [his]90-jim head and tenderly kisses [my]0-i inner ankle . [We]390-we stare at [each other]351-each other as something intimate runs between [us]390-we . A closeness that the reality of the situation should n’t allow . “ Do n’t look at [me]0-i like that , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper to break the seriousness of the moment , “ or [I]0-i ’m going to give [you]90-jim another hickey . ”[0-i] [His]90-jim eyes widen . “ [I]90-jim better not have a fucking hickey , [Emily]91-emily . ”[90-jim] [I]0-i laugh out loud as [I]0-i look at the huge purple welt rising on [his]90-jim neck . God , what the hell ? [I]0-i ’ve been reading way too many vampire romances . “ Will [you]90-jim be in trouble with [[your]90-jim mother]3144-your mother ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i tease . [He]90-jim laughs and slams into [me]0-i and hits just the right spot , and [I]0-i moan . Oh . . . [this man]327-this man knows [his]327-this man way around [a woman]381-a woman ’s body . Every touch is perfectly placed and magnified . [He]327-this man knows exactly how to take [me]0-i apart at the seams . [He]327-this man lifts [my]0-i hip with [his]327-this man hand and circles deep , and [my]0-i body takes on its own agenda because [I]0-i need to come . Hard . “ Fuck [me]0-i , ”[0-i] [I]0-i beg . “ Give [me]0-i that beautiful cock of [yours]0-i . Harder , ”[0-i] [I]0-i moan . “ Fuck , [I]0-i need it harder . ”[0-i] [His]327-this man eyes close in pleasure , and [he]327-this man pumps [me]0-i at piston pace . [I]0-i grab on to [him]327-this man as tightly as [I]0-i can as [I]0-i convulse . [He]327-this man holds [himself]327-this man deep and cries out into [my]0-i neck , and [I]0-i feel [his]327-this man cock jerk as it releases . [We]394-we pant as [we]394-we cling to each other , wet with perspiration , [our]394-we hearts racing wildly together , and [he]327-this man smiles up against [my]0-i cheek as if remembering something . “ What ? ”[327-this man] “ Welcome to [the Miles - High Club]3145-the miles - high club , [Emily]91-emily . ”[0-i] [I]0-i giggle as [I]0-i kiss [him]327-this man . “ First class is the only way to fly . ”[0-i] [Jim]90-jim smiles sexily down at [me]0-i as [I]0-i lie naked in bed . [He]327-this man ’s dressed , and [his]327-this man bag is packed and by the door . “ [I]327-this man have to go . ”[327-this man] [I]0-i screw up [my]0-i face and hold out [my]0-i arms . “ No , do n’t leave [me]0-i , ”[0-i] [I]0-i tease in a whiny voice . [He]327-this man chuckles as [he]327-this man bends and takes [me]0-i into [his]327-this man arms one last time . [We]395-we ’re not on [the same plane]396-the same plane back to [New York]3-new york this morning ; [his]327-this man flight leaves early , and [mine]0-i leaves late . [He]327-this man kisses [me]0-i softly . “ What a night , ”[327-this man] [he]327-this man whispers . [I]0-i smile as [his]327-this man head drops to the crook of [my]0-i neck , [his]327-this man teeth nipping down toward [my]0-i collarbone . “ [I]0-i wo n’t be walking for a month — actually , a year , ”[0-i] [I]0-i mutter dryly . [He]327-this man bends and bites [my]0-i nipple hard , and [I]0-i jump . Then [he]327-this man comes back up , and [his]327-this man eyes meet [mine]0-i . [I]0-i cup [his]327-this man handsome face . “ [I]327-this man had an incredible night . ”[327-this man] [He]327-this man smiles softly . “ [Me]327-this man too . ”[327-this man] [I]0-i reach up and put [my]0-i finger on the huge hickey on [his]327-this man neck , and [his]327-this man fingers go to it too . “ What the fuck were [you]327-this man thinking ? ”[327-this man] “ [I]0-i have no idea what came over [me]0-i . ”[0-i] [I]0-i giggle . “ [Your]327-this man dick was too good , turned [me]0-i into an animal . ”[0-i] [He]327-this man bites [me]0-i again . “ How am [I]327-this man supposed to get on [a plane]3123-a plane with a huge - ass hickey on [my]327-this man neck ? ”[327-this man] [he]327-this man scolds . “ If [you]0-i knew how many important meetings [I]327-this man have this week , [Emily]91-emily . . . ”[327-this man] [We]397-we both laugh , and then [his]327-this man face falls as [he]327-this man watches [me]0-i . [I]0-i ’m not joking — [I]0-i do n’t want [him]327-this man to leave [me]0-i . [This man]327-this man is everything [I]0-i ’m not looking for , but [he]327-this man ’s somehow ticking every box . What if [I]0-i never see [him]327-this man again ? How am [I]0-i supposed to move on from a night like this , erase it from [my]0-i memory bank , and pretend it never happened ? [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes in disgust with [myself]0-i . This is why [I]0-i do n’t do one - night stands . [I]0-i ’m not cut out for sex without strings — it ’s not who [I]0-i am . [I]0-i will never be [that person]399-that person . [I]0-i hate that [he]327-this man is . “ Actually , [I]0-i have a scarf in [my]0-i bag . Do [you]327-this man want it ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Yes , ”[327-this man] [he]327-this man snaps . [I]0-i climb out of bed and go to [my]0-i suitcase and begin to rummage through it . [He]327-this man takes the opportunity and stands behind [me]0-i and grabs [my]0-i naked hip bones in [his]327-this man hands and pumps [me]0-i with [his]327-this man hips . [I]0-i stand and turn to face [him]327-this man . “ [I]327-this man ’m not even joking now — stay another night . ”[327-this man] [He]327-this man traces [his]327-this man finger down [my]0-i face and cups [my]0-i jaw in [his]327-this man hand as [our]400-our eyes lock . “ [I]327-this man ca n’t , ”[327-this man] [he]327-this man whispers , [his]327-this man eyes searching [mine]0-i . . . with something unspoken . Does [he]327-this man have [someone]401-someone at [home]3076-home ? Is that why [he]327-this man has n’t asked for [my]0-i number ? Uneasiness fills [me]0-i . [I]0-i ’m not made for this one - night stand crap . [I]0-i turn [my]0-i back on [him]327-this man and dig out the scarf and hand it over . It ’s cream and cashmere , and it ’s initialed . E.F. [[[My]0-i mother]403-my mother ’s tennis group]404-my mother ’s tennis group gave it to [me]0-i as a gift when [I]0-i finished college . [I]0-i did love it . . . but oh well . [He]327-this man frowns as [he]327-this man looks down at the embroidered letters , and [I]0-i take it from [him]327-this man and wrap it around [his]327-this man neck to cover the huge purple bruise . [I]0-i smirk as [I]0-i look at it . [I]0-i did n’t even know how to give a hickey . [I]0-i must have really been in the moment . “ What does the F stand for ? ”[327-this man] [he]327-this man asks . “ [Fuck bunny]3147-fuck bunny . ”[327-this man] [I]0-i smile to cover [my]0-i disappointment . [I]0-i do n’t want [him]327-this man to know that [his]327-this man last comment upset [me]0-i . [He]327-this man chuckles and grabs [me]0-i roughly into [his]327-this man arms and walks [me]0-i back toward the bed . “ What an apt description that is . ”[327-this man] [He]327-this man takes [my]0-i leg and wraps it around [his]327-this man waist , and [we]405-we share one last lingering kiss . “ Goodbye , [[my]327-this man beautiful fuck bunny]3148-my beautiful fuck bunny , ”[327-this man] [he]327-this man whispers . [I]0-i run [my]0-i fingers through [his]327-this man hair as [I]0-i stare at [his]327-this man gorgeous face . “ Goodbye , Blue Eyes . ”[0-i] [He]327-this man picks the scarf up and inhales deeply . “ This smells like [you]0-i . ”[327-this man] “ Put it on every time [you]327-this man jerk off . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile sweetly . “ Imagine it ’s [me]0-i doing all the work . ”[0-i] [His]327-this man eyes flicker with excitement . “ [You]0-i know , for [someone who has n’t had sex for eighteen months]3149-someone who has n’t had sex for eighteen months , [you]0-i ’re [a fucking sex maniac]3150-a fucking sex maniac . ”[0-i] [I]0-i giggle . “ [I]0-i ’ll go back to [[my]0-i drought]3151-my drought now . It ’s safe there . . . and [I]0-i can walk unassisted . ”[0-i] [His]327-this man face falls , and [I]0-i feel like [he]327-this man wants to say something but is stopping [himself]327-this man . “ [You]0-i ’re going to miss [your]0-i plane . ”[0-i] [I]0-i fake a smile . [We]406-we kiss once more , and [I]0-i hold [him]327-this man tight , and [God]88-god , [he]327-this man really is incredible . [He]327-this man stands , and with one last lingering look at [me]0-i lying naked in the bed , [he]327-this man turns and walks out . [I]0-i smile sadly at the door [he]327-this man just left through . “ Yes , sure , [you]327-this man can have [my]0-i number , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper into the silence . But [he]327-this man did n’t want it . [He]327-this man ’s gone . Twelve months later [I]0-i exhale and put [my]0-i hand over [my]0-i heart as [I]0-i stand on the curbside and look up at [the glass skyscraper in front of [me]0-i]407-the glass skyscraper in front of me . [My]0-i phone rings , and the name [Mom]105-mom lights up the screen . “ Hello , [Mom]105-mom . ”[105-mom] [I]0-i smile . [I]0-i get a vision of [[my]0-i beautiful mother]408-my beautiful mother . [She]408-my beautiful mother has a perfect blonde bob and flawless skin , and [she]408-my beautiful mother ’s always immaculately dressed . If [I]0-i can look half as good as [her]408-my beautiful mother at [her]408-my beautiful mother age , [I]0-i will be winning at life . [I]0-i miss [her]408-my beautiful mother already . “ Oh , [darling]3152-darling , [I]408-my beautiful mother just called to wish [you]3152-darling good luck . ”[408-my beautiful mother] “ Thank [you]105-mom . ”[0-i] [I]0-i tap [my]0-i toe , unable to stand still . “ [I]0-i ’m so nervous [I]0-i was throwing up this morning . ”[0-i] “ [They]3153-they ’re going to love [you]0-i , [dear]3154-dear . ”[408-my beautiful mother] “ Oh God . ”[0-i] [I]0-i exhale heavily . “ [I]0-i hope so . It took [me]0-i six damn interviews to get this job , and [I]0-i had to move across [the country]3120-the country for it . ”[0-i] [I]0-i screw up [my]0-i face in fear . “ Have [I]0-i done the right thing , [Mom]105-mom ? ”[0-i] “ Yes , love , this job is [your]3152-darling dream , and besides , [you]3152-darling needed to get away from [Robbie]106-robbie . The distance from [him]106-robbie will do [you]3152-darling good . ”[0-i] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . “ [Mom]3156-mom , do n’t bring [Robbie]106-robbie into it . ”[0-i] “ [Darling]107-darling , [you]3152-darling ’re dating [a man who is unemployed and lives in [[his]106-robbie parents]3158-his parents ’ garage]3157-a man who is unemployed and lives in his parents ’ garage . [I]0-i do n’t understand what [you]3152-darling see in [him]106-robbie . ”[0-i] “ [He]106-robbie ’s just between jobs at the moment . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh . “ Then if [he]106-robbie ’s got nothing going on here , why would n’t [he]106-robbie move to [New York]3-new york with [you]3152-darling ? ”[0-i] “ [He]106-robbie does n’t like [New York]3-new york . It ’s too busy for [him]106-robbie . ”[0-i] “ Oh , [Emily]91-emily , can [you]3152-darling hear the excuses [you]3152-darling make for [this man]327-this man ? If [he]106-robbie loved [you]3152-darling , [he]106-robbie would be there supporting [your]3152-darling dream , since [he]106-robbie does n’t have any of [his]106-robbie own . ”[0-i] [I]0-i exhale heavily . [I]0-i ’ve been thinking these things [myself]0-i , but no way in hell would [I]0-i admit it to [anyone]295-anyone . “ Are [you]3152-darling calling [me]0-i to stress [me]0-i out about [Robbie]106-robbie , or are [you]3152-darling calling [me]0-i to wish [me]0-i luck ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ [I]0-i ’m calling [you]3152-darling to wish [you]3152-darling luck . Good luck , [darling]3152-darling . Go and show [them]3152-darling what [you]3152-darling ’re made of . ”[0-i] [I]0-i jiggle on the spot nervously as [I]0-i look at [the towering building above [me]0-i]410-the towering building above me . “ Thanks . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i ’ll call [you]3152-darling tonight for a full debrief . ”[0-i] “ Okay . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ [I]0-i ’m going to go in . ”[0-i] “ Go get ’em , [tiger]3161-tiger . ”[411-she] [She]411-she hangs up . [I]0-i stare up at [the building]412-the building and at the fancy gold letters over the large double front doors . [MILES MEDIA]12-miles media [I]0-i exhale and drop [my]0-i shoulders . “ Right . [You]3152-darling can do this . ”[0-i] This is the opportunity of all opportunities . [Miles Media]12-miles media is [the biggest conglomerate media empire in [the United States]414-the united states]413-the biggest conglomerate media empire in the united states and [one of the largest in [the world]268-the world]415-one of the largest in the world , with [over two thousand staff based in [New York]3-new york alone]417-over two thousand staff based in new york alone . [My]0-i fascination with journalism started in the eighth grade when [I]0-i witnessed a car accident on [my]0-i way [home]3076-home from [school]419-school one day . Because [I]0-i was [the only witness]420-the only witness , [I]0-i had to give a statement to [the police]421-the police , and then when it turned out that [the car]422-the car was stolen , the local paper came and interviewed [me]0-i . [I]0-i felt like [a rock star]292-a rock star that day , and the shine never dulled . [I]0-i ’ve been to college to study journalism and done internships with [the best companies in [the United States]13-the united states]424-the best companies in the united states . But it was [Miles Media]12-miles media that [I]0-i had [my]0-i heart set on . [Their]12-miles media stories are a cut above the rest ; [no other media company]425-no other media company would do . [I]0-i ’ve applied for every position that has come up for three years and only recently got a callback . And even then , [I]0-i went to six interviews before [I]0-i was offered the job , and [God]88-god , just do n’t let [me]0-i screw this up . [I]0-i take out [my]0-i security card and put the lanyard around [my]0-i neck , and [I]0-i glance down at [my]0-i phone . No missed calls . [Robbie]106-robbie did n’t even call [me]0-i to wish [me]0-i luck . Ugh , [men]426-men . [I]0-i make [my]0-i way to reception . [The security guard at the front desk]427-the security guard at the front desk accepts [my]0-i identification , and [I]0-i am given a code to work [the elevator]428-the elevator . [My]0-i heart is beating so fast as [I]0-i get into [the elevator]428-the elevator with [all the beautiful posh - looking people]430-all the beautiful posh - looking people , and [I]0-i push the button for [the fortieth floor]431-the fortieth floor . [I]0-i glance over at [myself]0-i in the mirrored doors . [I]0-i ’m wearing a black pencil skirt that hangs to midcalf , sheer black stockings with patent leather high heels , and a cream long - sleeved silk blouse . [I]0-i wanted to look professional and elegant . [I]0-i ’m not sure if [I]0-i pulled it off , but here ’s hoping . [I]0-i pull [my]0-i hand through [my]0-i thick dark ponytail as [the elevator]428-the elevator flies higher and higher . [I]0-i take a side glance at the others in [the elevator]428-the elevator . [The men]434-the men are all in expensive suits , and [the women]435-the women are ultraprofessional and wearing full faces of makeup . Damn it , [I]0-i should have worn bright lipstick . [I]0-i ’ll buy one on [my]0-i lunch break . The doors open on [the fortieth floor]431-the fortieth floor , and [I]0-i stride out as if [I]0-i do n’t have a fear in [the world]268-the world . Faking confidence is [my]0-i superpower , and today [I]0-i ’m totally faking it till [I]0-i make it . Or at least die trying . “ Hello . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile at [the kind - looking woman standing by reception]438-the kind - looking woman standing by reception . “ [I]438-the kind - looking woman standing by reception ’m [Emily Foster]91-emily . [I]438-the kind - looking woman standing by reception ’m starting today . ”[438-the kind - looking woman standing by reception] [She]438-the kind - looking woman standing by reception smiles broadly . “ Hello , [Emily]91-emily , [my]438-the kind - looking woman standing by reception name is [Frances]108-frances , and [I]438-the kind - looking woman standing by reception am one of [the floor managers]3162-the floor managers . ”[438-the kind - looking woman standing by reception] [She]438-the kind - looking woman standing by reception steps over to [me]0-i and shakes [my]0-i hand . “ Lovely to meet [you]0-i . ”[438-the kind - looking woman standing by reception] Well , [she]438-the kind - looking woman standing by reception seems nice . “ Come through , and [I]438-the kind - looking woman standing by reception ’ll show [you]0-i to [your]0-i desk . ”[438-the kind - looking woman standing by reception] [She]438-the kind - looking woman standing by reception walks off , and [I]0-i peer into [the huge office space]439-the huge office space . The tables are grouped into lots of four or six with partitions separating [them]440-them from the others . “ As [you]0-i know , [each floor of [this building]3164-this building]3163-each floor of this building is [a different arm of [the company]3166-the company]3165-a different arm of the company , ”[438-the kind - looking woman standing by reception] [she]438-the kind - looking woman standing by reception says as [she]438-the kind - looking woman standing by reception walks . “ [We]3167-we have internationals and magazines from floor twenty down . [Floors thirty to forty]3168-floors thirty to forty are news and current affairs , and above forty are television and cable . ”[438-the kind - looking woman standing by reception] [I]0-i nod nervously . “ [The two top levels of [the building]412-the building]3169-the two top levels of the building are [senior management]3171-senior management only , and [your]0-i security card wo n’t get [you]0-i up [there]3073-there . It ’s customary for [new employees]3173-new employees to be taken on a guided tour of [the building]412-the building , and [Lindsey]109-lindsey from [human resources]3175-human resources will come and get [you]0-i at two o’clock this afternoon . ”[438-the kind - looking woman standing by reception] “ Okay , great . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i feel [my]0-i confidence seep out into the carpet . God , this is all so professional . “ [Most people]3176-most people start on level four and work [their]3176-most people way up [the building]412-the building , so congratulations for starting on level forty . That in itself is amazing . ”[441-she] [She]441-she smiles broadly . “ Thank [you]441-she , ”[441-she] [I]0-i reply nervously . [She]441-she leads [me]0-i over to a group of four desks by the window and pulls out a chair . “ This is [your]0-i desk . ”[441-she] “ Oh . ”[0-i] [I]0-i feel the blood drain from [my]0-i face . [I]0-i ’ve totally bitten off more than [I]0-i can chew here . [I]0-i fall into [my]0-i seat as panic begins to rise in [my]0-i stomach . “ Hello , ”[3093-a man] [a man]3093-a man says as [he]3093-a man sits in the seat beside [me]0-i . “ [I]3093-a man ’m [Aaron]110-aaron . ”[3093-a man] [He]3093-a man reaches over and shakes [my]0-i hand with a broad smile . “ [You]0-i must be [Emily]91-emily . ”[3093-a man] “ Hi , [Aaron]110-aaron , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper , feeling totally inadequate . “ [I]108-frances ’ll leave [you]110-aaron in [Aaron]110-aaron ’s safe hands . ”[108-frances] [Frances]108-frances smiles . “ Thank [you]110-aaron . ”[108-frances] “ Have a great day . ”[108-frances] [She]108-frances returns to [reception]443-reception . And [I]0-i stare at the computer on [my]0-i desk as [my]0-i heart begins to beat violently . “ Are [you]0-i excited ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron asks . “ Oh [my]0-i God , [I]0-i ’m petrified , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i turn to [him]110-aaron . “ [I]0-i ’ve never done this job before . [I]0-i usually find the stories with [[my]0-i group]3178-my group . ”[0-i] [He]110-aaron smiles warmly . “ Do n’t worry ; [we]3179-we all felt the same when [we]3179-we started , but [they]3178-my group would n’t have given [you]0-i the job if [they]3178-my group did n’t think [you]0-i could do it . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i give [him]110-aaron a lopsided smile . “ [I]0-i just do n’t want to let [anyone]295-anyone down . ”[0-i] [He]110-aaron reaches over and puts [his]110-aaron hand on top of [mine]0-i . “ [You]0-i wo n’t . [This team]3181-this team is great , and [we]3179-we help [each other]351-each other . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i glance down at [his]110-aaron hand on [mine]0-i . “ Oh . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron pulls it away as [he]110-aaron notices [my]0-i discomfort . “ [I]110-aaron ’m totally gay and way too touchy , apparently . Tell [me]110-aaron if [I]110-aaron get in [your]0-i space . [I]110-aaron have no sphere of reference . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i smile , grateful for [his]110-aaron honesty . “ Okay . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i look around [the office]444-the office as [people]267-people file in . “ How long have [you]110-aaron worked [here]275-here ? ”[0-i] “ Four years . [I]110-aaron love it . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron shivers [his]110-aaron shoulders to accentuate [his]110-aaron point . “ Best job [I]110-aaron ’ve ever had . [I]110-aaron moved from [San Fran]14-san fran for it . ”[110-aaron] “ [I]0-i moved from [California]15-california . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile proudly . “ [You]110-aaron here by [yourself]110-aaron ? ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron asks . “ Yeah . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i shrug . “ [I]0-i got [a little one - bedroom apartment]3184-a little one - bedroom apartment . [I]0-i arrived on Friday . ”[0-i] “ What did [you]110-aaron do all weekend ? ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron asks . “ Freaked out about today . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron laughs . “ Do n’t worry . [We]3185-we ’ve all been [there]3073-there . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i look around at the two other empty chairs . “ Who else do [we]3185-we work with ? ”[0-i] “ [Molly]111-molly . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron points to the chair behind [me]0-i . “ [She]111-molly does n’t start until nine thirty . [She]111-molly ’s [a single mom]3187-a single mom and has to get [[her]111-molly kids]3188-her kids off to [school]419-school first . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i smile ; [I]0-i like that . “ And [Ava]112-ava — [she]111-molly ’s just late because [she]111-molly probably went out last night partying . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . [He]110-aaron rolls [his]110-aaron eyes . “ [She]111-molly ’s [a deplorable party girl]3190-a deplorable party girl , and [she]111-molly ’s never at [her]111-molly desk — always finds somewhere [she]111-molly has to be . ”[110-aaron] “ Hello , ”[446-a girl] [a girl]446-a girl says as [she]446-a girl runs up the aisle and sits down in [her]446-a girl chair . [She]446-a girl ’s panting and holds out [her]446-a girl hand . “ [I]446-a girl ’m [Ava]112-ava . ”[446-a girl] [I]0-i shake [her]446-a girl hand and smile . “ [I]0-i ’m [Emily]91-emily . ”[0-i] [Ava]112-ava is younger than [me]0-i and very attractive , with a honey - colored bob and dramatic makeup . [She]112-ava ’s trendy and very [New York]3-new york . “ Open up [your]0-i computer , [Emily]91-emily , and [I]110-aaron ’ll show [you]0-i through [our]3191-our programs , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron says . “ Okay , ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i reply as [I]0-i concentrate on [my]0-i task . “ Oh [my]112-ava God , [Aaron]110-aaron , ”[112-ava] [Ava]112-ava says . “ [I]112-ava met [the hottest fucking guy last night]3192-the hottest fucking guy last night . ”[112-ava] “ Here [we]3191-our go . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron sighs . “ [You]0-i meet [the hottest fucking guy]3193-the hottest fucking guy every night . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i find [myself]0-i smiling as [I]0-i listen to [them]447-them . “ No , seriously , this time [I]447-them mean it . ”[447-them] [I]0-i glance over at [Aaron]110-aaron , and [he]110-aaron smirks at [me]0-i and rolls [his]110-aaron eyes as if [he]110-aaron ’s heard it all before . [She]112-ava gets to work , and [Aaron]110-aaron goes through and explains the programs as [I]0-i take notes . “ At ten o’clock the stories will start coming in . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i listen intently . “ [We]3194-we , as [reporters]3195-reporters , go through [them]447-them and all say yay or nay as to whether it ’s got legs and if [we]3194-we go and report on it . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i frown . “ But how will [I]0-i know that ? ”[0-i] “ [We]3194-we just vote yes for stuff that interests [us]3194-we , [I]112-ava suppose , ”[112-ava] [Ava]112-ava says . “ Obviously , news stories that are breaking are crucial , but it ’s the other content that [they]447-them pay [us]3194-we for . ”[112-ava] [She]112-ava reads an email . “ For example , [three coffee shops]3196-three coffee shops have closed down in one week within two blocks from each other . ”[112-ava] [She]112-ava rolls [her]112-ava eyes . “ Honestly , who gives a fuck ? This is n’t news . ”[0-i] [I]0-i giggle . “ Here ’s one . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron reads out , “ [A driver]3197-a driver has been clocked traveling at one hundred fifty - five miles per hour , and [he]3197-a driver ran a police stop sign . [He]3197-a driver was involved in a hot pursuit and ended up crashing into [parked cars in [Brooklyn]16-brooklyn]3198-parked cars in brooklyn . ”[110-aaron] [Ava]112-ava nods . “ Yeah , that ’s good . ”[112-ava] “ [We]3194-we ’ll go with that . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron types something and puts the file into a saved folder . “ So how does this work ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [We]3194-we collect stories , and then [we]3194-we discuss collectively what each of [us]3194-we has done and put together a list of stories . [You]0-i research [your]0-i stories and have them in by four each day for the next day ’s news . Then [we]3194-we send them on to [Hayden]113-hayden , and [he]113-hayden sends [them]3199-them to editing . Obviously , if a good story comes in , it will take priority over everything else , and it will go to live news immediately . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i listen . “ So [we]3194-we each get [our]3194-we own stories and leads sent to [us]3194-we ? ”[0-i] “ Yes , by email . By others on this level . ”[0-i] [I]0-i glance around at [all the workers surrounding [us]449-us]448-all the workers surrounding us . “ [We]3194-we keep [our]3194-we finger on the pulse of what sells and what news really is , ”[112-ava] [Ava]112-ava replies . “ It ’s the coolest job ever . ”[112-ava] [I]0-i smile . Maybe [I]0-i really can do this . “ Open [your]0-i emails . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron reaches over and opens something for [me]0-i on [my]0-i computer , and then [I]0-i watch as it keeps pinging . “ Those are all possible stories ? ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i frown . “ Yes . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron throws [me]0-i a playful wink . “ Get reading , [baby]3139-baby . [They]3201-they come in thick and fast . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i smile as excitement runs through [me]0-i . “ Just make sure [you]0-i get story details right . Nothing pisses [management]3202-management off more than incorrect names . [You]0-i will get into huge trouble . ”[110-aaron] “ Got it . ”[450-the kind voice] [I]0-i ’ve just gotten back from lunch when [my]0-i phone rings . “ Hi , [Emily]91-emily , this is [Lindsey]109-lindsey from [human resources]3175-human resources . [I]450-the kind voice ’ll be up in about five minutes to get [you]0-i , ”[450-the kind voice] [the kind voice]450-the kind voice says on the phone . [I]0-i wince . Oh , that ’s right — [I]0-i have that damn building tour . “ Okay , thank [you]450-the kind voice . ”[0-i] [I]0-i hang up . “ Oh no , [I]0-i have to go on the office tour , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper to [[my]0-i colleagues]451-my colleagues . “ That ’s okay , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron replies as [he]110-aaron continues reading [his]110-aaron emails . “ [I]110-aaron ’ve got so many leads , ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i stammer . “ [I]0-i ca n’t keep up . ”[0-i] “ Do n’t worry . It ’s fine , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron comforts [me]0-i . “ What if [I]110-aaron miss a really important story ? ”[110-aaron] “ [You]110-aaron won’t — it ’s fine . [I]0-i ’ll go through [yours]110-aaron while [you]110-aaron ’re gone . ”[0-i] “ Really ? ”[0-i] “ Of course it is . [You]110-aaron are n’t expected to know everything on day one . ”[110-aaron] “ Oh no , [you]0-i have to go to the top . ”[112-ava] [Ava]112-ava grimaces . “ What ’s the top ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [Upper - management offices]3204-upper - management offices . ”[0-i] “ [They]3204-upper - management offices ’re not nice ? ”[110-aaron] “ No , [they]3204-upper - management offices ’re fucking horrible , and [you]0-i have a good chance of being fired on the spot . ”[112-ava] “ What ? ”[0-i] “ Oh , bullshit . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron rolls [his]110-aaron eyes . “ [They]3204-upper - management offices just do n’t . . . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron screws up [his]110-aaron face as [he]110-aaron chooses [his]110-aaron words . “ [They]3204-upper - management offices do n’t fluff . If something is going to be said , [they]3204-upper - management offices just say it how it is . [They]3204-upper - management offices do n’t take any shit from [anyone]295-anyone . ”[110-aaron] “ Who are [they]3204-upper - management offices ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Well , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles wo n’t be there . [He]114-mr. miles never is . [I]0-i think [he]114-mr. miles ’s in [London]8-london . ”[0-i] “ [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask as [I]0-i feel [my]0-i nerves dance . “ [The CEO]3206-the ceo . ”[0-i] “ Yes , [I]0-i know who [he]114-mr. miles is . [I]0-i think [everyone]3098-everyone does . Although [I]0-i ’ve never seen a picture of [him]114-mr. miles . It ’s [him]114-mr. miles and [[his]114-mr. miles brothers]3208-his brothers , right ? ”[0-i] “ Yes , it ’s [the [Miles]114-mr. miles family who owns everything . [He]114-mr. miles and [[his]114-mr. miles three brothers]3210-his three brothers]3209-the miles family who owns everything . he and his three brothers . ”[112-ava] “ And [they]3209-the miles family who owns everything . he and his three brothers ’re all [upstairs]3211-upstairs ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i quickly take out the bright lipstick [I]0-i bought at lunch and reapply . [I]0-i need some courage here . “ Just do n’t say anything stupid up in the management levels , ”[112-ava] [Ava]112-ava says . [My]0-i eyes widen . “ Like what ? What do [they]3209-the miles family who owns everything . he and his three brothers consider stupid ? ”[112-ava] [I]0-i ’m really beginning to panic . “ Just keep [your]0-i mouth shut , take the tour , and do n’t tell [HR]115-hr anything . ”[112-ava] “ Why not ? ”[112-ava] “ Because [they]3209-the miles family who owns everything . he and his three brothers ’re on speed dial to the management levels . This whole tour [you]0-i ’re taking now is just so [they]3209-the miles family who owns everything . he and his three brothers can do a personality assessment on [you]0-i in the two hours it takes [them]3209-the miles family who owns everything . he and his three brothers to show [you]0-i around . ”[112-ava] “ Oh [my]0-i God . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh . “ Hi , [Emily]91-emily , is it ? [I]0-i ’m [Lindsey]109-lindsey . ”[0-i] [I]0-i turn to see [a beautiful blonde]452-a beautiful blonde , and [I]0-i stand immediately and put out [my]0-i hand . “ Hello . ”[452-a beautiful blonde] [She]452-a beautiful blonde smiles at [[my]0-i coworkers]453-my coworkers . “ Let ’s get started . [We]457-we will go down to level one and work [our]457-we way up . ”[452-a beautiful blonde] [I]0-i give [[my]0-i new work friends]454-my new work friends a nervous wave and follow [her]452-a beautiful blonde out of [the office]444-the office and into [the elevator]428-the elevator . Here [we]457-we go . An hour and a half later “ And this is [the gymnasium]3212-the gymnasium , for [[our]457-we staff]3213-our staff ’s own personal use . ”[0-i] [I]0-i look around at [the expansive and swanky - looking gym on [level sixty]17-level sixty]458-the expansive and swanky - looking gym on level sixty . “ Wow . ”[0-i] “ [It]458-the expansive and swanky - looking gym on level sixty ’s open from six in the morning until six thirty at night . [It]458-the expansive and swanky - looking gym on level sixty ’s busiest before work , obviously , but [you]3214-you can come [here]275-here on [your]3214-you lunch break also . [A lot of [people]267-people]3216-a lot of people take a late or early lunch so that it ’s not as busy when [they]3216-a lot of people come . ”[0-i] [This place]459-this place is ridiculous . [A cafeteria on level two that is the entire floor]460-a cafeteria on level two that is the entire floor , [a movie theater]461-a movie theater , [a gymnasium]462-a gymnasium , [a mailroom floor]463-a mailroom floor , [a computer geek floor]464-a computer geek floor . Everything has been thought out with such care . “ Okay , let ’s get going . ”[109-lindsey] [Lindsey]109-lindsey smiles . “ [We]465-we will head up to [the management floors]3218-the management floors now . ”[109-lindsey] [My]0-i stomach dances with nerves as [we]465-we head back into [the elevator]428-the elevator . [She]109-lindsey gets in and looks at the buttons . “ Oh look , [you]109-lindsey ’re in luck . ”[109-lindsey] [I]0-i frown in question . “ [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles is here . ”[109-lindsey] [I]0-i fake a smile . “ [I]0-i ’ll take [you]109-lindsey to meet [him]114-mr. miles first . ”[0-i] Oh God . Do n’t speak . Do n’t say anything stupid , [I]0-i remind [myself]0-i . [I]0-i twist [my]0-i fingers in front of [me]0-i nervously as [we]465-we ride to [the top floor]467-the top floor . The doors open , and [I]0-i step out of [the elevator]428-the elevator and stop still . What the hell ? White marble for as far as [I]0-i can see , floor - to - ceiling glass , and luxurious white leather furnishings . “ Hello , [Sammia]116-sammia . ”[109-lindsey] [Lindsey]109-lindsey smiles as [I]0-i look around in awe . [This place]459-this place is insane . [A beautiful woman]470-a beautiful woman looks up from [her]470-a beautiful woman computer at reception , and [she]470-a beautiful woman smiles warmly . “ Hello , [Lindsey]109-lindsey . ”[470-a beautiful woman] “ This is [Emily]91-emily . [She]91-emily ’s new and started on level forty today . ”[116-sammia] [Sammia]116-sammia comes around and shakes [my]0-i hand . “ Lovely to meet [you]0-i , [Emily]91-emily . ”[116-sammia] “ Is [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles taking [visitors]3219-visitors ? ”[109-lindsey] [Lindsey]109-lindsey asks . “ [He]114-mr. miles is . ”[116-sammia] [She]116-sammia smiles . “ [I]116-sammia ’ll just announce [you]0-i . ”[116-sammia] Announce [me]0-i . . . jeez . [Lindsey]109-lindsey hunches [her]109-lindsey shoulders as if [she]109-lindsey ’s nervous too . [Sammia]116-sammia picks up the phone . “ [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles , [we]3220-we have [a new staff member]3221-a new staff member to meet [you]0-i in [reception]443-reception . ”[116-sammia] [She]116-sammia listens for a moment and smiles . “ Yes , [sir]3064-sir . ”[116-sammia] [She]116-sammia puts the phone down . “ Just go in . ”[116-sammia] “ This way , [Emily]91-emily . ”[109-lindsey] [Lindsey]109-lindsey directs [me]0-i across [a huge boardroom]471-a huge boardroom , and [my]0-i heels click on the marble . Why do n’t [Lindsey]109-lindsey ’s shoes click ? Okay , buy rubber - soled shoes tomorrow . [We]472-we get to the end of [the huge room]473-the huge room and down [another corridor]474-another corridor , and [my]0-i heels are clicking like [I]0-i do n’t know what . They ’re even annoying [me]0-i . [I]0-i sound like a horse . [I]0-i feel like taking them off and throwing them in the trash . Just be quiet . [I]0-i ’m trying to appear professional here . [We]472-we get to a set of black double doors , and [Lindsey]109-lindsey knocks as [my]0-i heart pounds in [my]0-i chest . Just . . . do n’t say anything stupid . “ Come in , ”[109-lindsey] a deep voice calls . [Lindsey]109-lindsey opens the doors , and [I]0-i step into [the office]444-the office . Familiar blue eyes rise to meet [mine]0-i from behind the large mahogany desk , and [I]0-i stop dead still . What ? “ [Emily Foster]91-emily , [I]109-lindsey would like to introduce [you]91-emily to [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles , ”[109-lindsey] [Lindsey]109-lindsey says . [I]0-i stare at [him]476-he , unable to speak because there ’s no air in [my]0-i lungs . [His]476-he eyebrow rises , and [he]476-he sits back in [his]476-he chair as [he]476-he smirks . “ Hello , [Emily]91-emily . ”[476-he] [His]476-he big eyes hold [mine]0-i , the same beautiful deep - blue eyes that hypnotized [me]0-i twelve months ago . It ’s [him]476-he . Chapter 3 Oh [my]0-i God . [He]476-he stands and walks around to [my]0-i side of the desk and holds [his]476-he hand out to shake [mine]0-i . “ [Jameson Miles]119-jameson miles . ”[476-he] [It]476-he ’s [him]476-he , [the layover guy who never asked for [my]0-i number]477-the layover guy who never asked for my number . [I]0-i stare at [him]476-he as [my]0-i brain completely misfires . [I]0-i ca n’t believe this . [He]476-he ’s [the fucking CEO]478-the fucking ceo ? “ [Emily]91-emily , tell [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles all about [yourself]91-emily , ”[109-lindsey] [Lindsey]109-lindsey says , as if to prompt [me]0-i to speak . “ Oh . ”[109-lindsey] [I]0-i catch [myself]0-i and shake [his]476-he hand . “ [I]0-i ’m [Emily Foster]91-emily . ”[0-i] [His]476-he hand is strong and warm , and [I]0-i ’m instantly reminded how it felt on [my]0-i skin . [I]0-i pull [my]0-i hand out of [his]476-he grip as if [he]476-he ’s given [me]0-i an electric shock . [His]476-he mischievous eyes hold [mine]0-i , and [he]476-he keeps [his]476-he face straight . “ Welcome to [Miles Media]12-miles media , ”[476-he] [he]476-he says calmly . “ Thanks , ”[476-he] [I]0-i croak . [I]0-i look over at [Lindsey]109-lindsey . Oh God , does [she]109-lindsey know [I]0-i ’m [a dirty - talking whore bag who fucked [[our]480-our boss ’s boss ’s boss]481-our boss ’s boss ’s boss]479-a dirty - talking whore bag who fucked our boss ’s boss ’s boss ? “ [I]114-mr. miles ’ll take it from here , [Lindsey]109-lindsey . [Emily]91-emily will be out in a moment , ”[114-mr. miles] [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles states . [Lindsey]109-lindsey frowns and looks over at [me]0-i . “ [I]109-lindsey ’ll just — ”[109-lindsey] “ Wait outside , ”[476-he] [he]476-he says as [he]476-he dismisses [her]109-lindsey . Shit . “ Yes , [sir]3064-sir , ”[109-lindsey] [she]109-lindsey says as [she]109-lindsey scurries for the door . [It]482-it closes behind [her]109-lindsey , and [I]0-i drag [my]0-i eyes back to [him]476-he . [He]476-he ’s tall , with dark hair , and [he]476-he ’s wearing the most perfectly fitted navy suit in the history of all suits . [His]476-he blue eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ Hello , [Emily]91-emily . ”[476-he] [I]0-i twist [my]0-i fingers in front of [myself]0-i nervously . “ Hi . ”[0-i] [He]476-he never asked for [your]0-i number . Screw [him]476-he . [I]0-i tilt [my]0-i chin to the ceiling as [I]0-i act brave . [I]0-i did n’t want [him]476-he to call [me]0-i anyway . [His]476-he eyes blaze , and [he]476-he rests [his]476-he behind on [his]476-he desk and crosses [his]476-he feet in front of [him]476-he . [I]0-i glance down at [his]476-he shoes . [I]0-i remember those pretentious expensive shoes . “ Given [any poor unsuspecting travel companions]3225-any poor unsuspecting travel companions hickeys lately ? ”[476-he] [he]476-he asks . Oh hell on a broomstick — [he]476-he remembers . [I]0-i feel [my]0-i face flush with embarrassment . [I]0-i ca n’t believe [I]0-i did that . Shit , shit , shit . “ Yes , just last night , actually . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause for effect . “ On [my]0-i flight [here]275-here . ”[0-i] [His]476-he jaw clenches , and [he]476-he raises [his]476-he eyebrow , unimpressed . “ So [you]476-he ’re not [Jim]90-jim ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ To [some people [I]0-i ’m [Jim]90-jim]3227-some people i ’m jim . ”[0-i] “ Women [you]0-i pick up for one - night stands , [you]0-i mean . ”[476-he] [He]476-he crosses [his]476-he arms in front of [him]476-he as if annoyed . “ What ’s with the attitude ? ”[476-he] “ [I]0-i do n’t have an attitude , ”[0-i] [I]0-i fire back . [He]476-he raises [his]476-he eyebrow again , and [I]0-i feel like slapping it down to [his]476-he chin . [I]0-i look around [[his]476-he over - the - top luxurious office]483-his over - the - top luxurious office . [It]483-his over - the - top luxurious office ’s ridiculous , with a 360 - degree view out over [New York]3-new york . [It]483-his over - the - top luxurious office has [a large lounge area with a fully stocked bar and leather stools lined up in front of [it]484-a large lounge area with a fully stocked bar and leather stools lined up in front of it and a conference table area and [a conference table area]485-a conference table area]484-a large lounge area with a fully stocked bar and leather stools lined up in front of it and a conference table area . [I]0-i can see [a hallway]486-a hallway with [a private bathroom]487-a private bathroom , and then [another few rooms]488-another few rooms are off that . [He]476-he runs [his]476-he fingertips over [his]476-he bottom lip as [he]476-he assesses [me]0-i , and [I]0-i feel it all the way to [my]0-i toes . God , [he]476-he ’s so gorgeous . [I]0-i ’ve thought of [him]476-he often over the last year . “ What are [you]0-i doing in [New York]3-new york ? ”[476-he] [he]476-he asks . “ Working for [Miles Media]12-miles media . ”[476-he] A thought crosses [my]0-i mind , and [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i remember something [he]476-he said to [me]0-i back then . Welcome to [the Miles - High Club]3145-the miles - high club . . . [Dear God]88-god , [I]0-i thought [he]476-he meant sex - in - [a - plane club]490-a - plane club . . . [he]476-he meant women who had slept with [him]476-he . [Miles]114-mr. miles . . . [he]114-mr. miles ’s [the Miles]491-the miles . . . and there ’s [a club]492-a club ? Damn it , the hottest sex of [my]0-i life was just an initiation into [some sleazy bedpost club]493-some sleazy bedpost club . For the past twelve months , the night that [we]494-we spent together was something special that [I]0-i held dear . [He]476-he awakened something inside [me]0-i that [I]0-i did n’t even know existed , and now [I]0-i find out that [I]0-i ’m one of many . [My]0-i heart drops in disappointment , and [I]0-i clench [my]0-i jaw to stop [myself]0-i from lashing out to try to hurt [him]476-he back . [Bastard]118-bastard . [I]0-i ’ve got to get out of [here]275-here before [I]0-i get [myself]0-i fired on [my]0-i first day . “ Nice to see [you]476-he again . ”[0-i] [I]0-i fake a smile , and with [my]0-i heart beating hard in [my]0-i chest , [I]0-i turn and walk out of [[his]476-he office]496-his office and close the door behind [me]0-i . “ All done ? ”[109-lindsey] [Lindsey]109-lindsey smiles . “ Yes . ”[0-i] [I]0-i nod . [We]497-we walk out through reception and into [the elevator]428-the elevator and begin to go back down to [my]0-i level . “ Do n’t feel rattled , ”[109-lindsey] [Lindsey]109-lindsey says softly . [I]0-i frown over at [her]109-lindsey in question . “ [He]476-he ’s very abrasive and not good with [people]267-people , but [his]476-he mind is beyond incredible . ”[0-i] Like [his]476-he dick . “ Oh , okay , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply as [I]0-i stare at the ground . “ Good to know . ”[0-i] “ Did [he]476-he say anything to [you]0-i ? ”[109-lindsey] “ No , ”[0-i] [I]0-i lie . “ Just polite chitchat . ”[109-lindsey] [She]109-lindsey smiles . “ [You]0-i should feel very privileged . [Jameson Miles]119-jameson miles does n’t make polite chitchat with [anyone]295-anyone . ”[109-lindsey] “ Oh . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . The door opens , and [I]0-i scurry out to evade this conversation . “ Thank [you]109-lindsey so much for showing [me]0-i around . ”[0-i] “ [You]109-lindsey ’re welcome , and if [you]109-lindsey have any human resource issues , please call [me]109-lindsey immediately . ”[109-lindsey] “ [I]0-i will . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shake [her]109-lindsey hand . Does being initiated into [the Miles dick - riding club]499-the miles dick - riding club classify as [a human resource issue]500-a human resource issue ? “ Thank [you]109-lindsey so much . ”[0-i] [I]0-i take off in the direction of [my]0-i desk , and [I]0-i discreetly grab [my]0-i phone from [my]0-i drawer . “ Back in a moment . ”[0-i] [I]0-i head to [the bathroom]328-the bathroom and bang the stall door open and lock it . Then in [the privacy of [the bathroom]328-the bathroom]502-the privacy of the bathroom , [I]0-i type into Google : [Jameson Miles]119-jameson miles . [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes as [I]0-i wait for the information to load . [My]0-i heart is hammering in [my]0-i chest . Please do n’t be married . . . please do n’t be married . [I]0-i ’ve beat [myself]0-i up over this for the last year , and it ’s played on [my]0-i mind as to why [he]119-jameson miles did n’t even pretend to want [my]0-i number . [I]0-i felt like [we]504-we had a connection , but there was something [he]119-jameson miles did n’t tell [me]0-i . And for some reason , afterward , [I]0-i got the feeling [he]119-jameson miles was married . . . or in a relationship . And that makes [me]0-i [a dirty ho]505-a dirty ho . [I]0-i ’ve never been with [a person who is in a committed relationship to someone else]506-a person who is in a committed relationship to someone else , and women who knowingly do that make [me]0-i sick . If [I]0-i had known how much it was going to play on [my]0-i mind , [I]0-i would n’t have gone near [him]119-jameson miles that night . [Jameson Grant Miles]119-jameson miles is [an American businessman and investor]507-an american businessman and investor . Aged 37 , [Miles]119-jameson miles is [the eldest son of media mogul [George Miles Jr.]120-george miles jr.]508-the eldest son of media mogul george miles jr. and [the grandson of [George Miles Sr]121-george]509-the grandson of george miles sr . In 2012 , [he]119-jameson miles inherited control of the family empire , Miles Media Holdings Ltd. , as well as investments in television , film , and multiple other companies . [He]119-jameson miles is [the former executive chairman of Publishing and Consolidated Media Holdings]510-the former executive chairman of publishing and consolidated media holdings , which predominantly owns media interests across a range of platforms , and also [a former executive chairman of Netflix]511-a former executive chairman of netflix . In May 2018 , [Miles]121-george ’s net worth was assessed as $ 5.50 billion , ranking [him]121-george among the top 100 richest Americans , alongside [[his]121-george three brothers]3210-his three brothers . Oh hell . [I]0-i read on . Personal life . Fiercely private , [he]121-george is known for a penchant for [beautiful women]513-beautiful women . [He]121-george dated [Claudia Mason]122-claudia from 2011 to 2015 and has had no known personal relationships since . [I]0-i put [my]0-i hand on [my]0-i chest and breathe out in relief . Thank God . [I]0-i click on the link for [Claudia Mason]122-claudia . Who is [she]122-claudia ? A barrage of images comes up , and [I]0-i feel [my]0-i confidence run down the drain . [Claudia Mason]122-claudia is [an English businesswoman and fashion icon]514-an english businesswoman and fashion icon . Aged 34 . [Mason]122-claudia is [a British journalist]515-a british journalist . [She]122-claudia is [the editor - in - chief of the British edition of Vogue]516-the editor - in - chief of the british edition of vogue and also [the youngest editor in the history of [British Vogue]19-british vogue]517-the youngest editor in the history of british vogue . [She]122-claudia took the helm of Vogue in 2014 . [Mason]122-claudia is one of [the country ’s most oft - quoted voices on fashion trends]518-the country ’s most oft - quoted voices on fashion trends . In addition to [her]122-claudia work with [Vogue]123-vogue , [Mason]122-claudia has written columns for [Miles Media]12-miles media and has ten published books . Personal life . [Mason]122-claudia is [the eldest of five children]519-the eldest of five children and is [the daughter of French politician [Marcel Angelo]124-marcel angelo]520-the daughter of french politician marcel angelo . [She]122-claudia dated and was engaged to media heir [Jameson Miles]119-jameson miles from 2011 to 2015 , but the relationship broke down and ended , which [she]122-claudia cited was due to [their]521-their individual workloads and commitments on [different sides of [the world]268-the world]522-different sides of the world . [She]122-claudia is currently dating [Edward Schneider]125-edward schneider , [a solicitor who resides in [London]8-london]524-a solicitor who resides in london . Engaged . . . [they]521-their were engaged ? [I]0-i exhale heavily and click out of [my]0-i search in disgust . Of course [he]119-jameson miles dated [her]122-claudia . Well , that ’s depressing . [She]122-claudia ’s [the damn editor of British Vogue]525-the damn editor of british vogue . [I]0-i ca n’t compete with that shit . It took [me]0-i three whole years to get a crappy job at [Miles Media]12-miles media . [I]0-i wash [my]0-i hands and fix [my]0-i hair in the mirror . Not that it matters anyway , [I]0-i guess . [I]0-i have [a boyfriend]526-a boyfriend , and [Jameson Miles]119-jameson miles is nothing to [me]0-i . [I]0-i storm back to [my]0-i desk with a fire in [my]0-i belly . [I]0-i wo n’t even see [him]526-a boyfriend . [I]0-i fall into [my]0-i seat . “ How was the tour ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron asks . “ Yeah , good . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i open [my]0-i email . “ Did [you]110-aaron go up to the top levels ? ”[0-i] “ Uh - huh . ”[0-i] [I]0-i begin to glance through [my]0-i five thousand emails that arrived in the two hours since [I]0-i left . Jeez , there ’s a lot of news around here . “ What about [the offices]3230-the offices ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron replies . “ [They]3230-the offices ’re something else , right ? All that white marble . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i lips as [I]0-i try to act casual . “ Uh - huh . ”[0-i] “ [I]111-molly did n’t get to see [the management offices]3231-the management offices when [I]111-molly started , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly says . “ [He]110-aaron was n’t taking [visitors]3219-visitors that day . ”[111-molly] [I]0-i glance over at [her]111-molly . “ [I]110-aaron went into [[his]110-aaron office]496-his office , but [he]110-aaron was n’t [there]3073-there , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron chimes in . “ Who ? [Jameson]119-jameson miles , [you]110-aaron mean ? ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i pretend to be uninterested in this conversation . “ Yeah , did [you]110-aaron see [him]110-aaron at all ? ”[0-i] “ Yep . ”[0-i] [I]0-i open an email . “ [I]0-i met [him]110-aaron . ”[0-i] [I]0-i fucked [his]110-aaron brains out too . “ Was [he]110-aaron [a rude pig]3235-a rude pig ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly frowns . “ [Everyone]3098-everyone is so scared of [him]110-aaron . ”[111-molly] “ No , [he]110-aaron seemed fine . [I]0-i was in [[his]110-aaron office]496-his office , and [he]110-aaron seemed okay . ”[0-i] “ [You]0-i were in [[his]110-aaron office]496-his office while [he]110-aaron was [there]3073-there ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron frowns . “ Uh - huh . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i keep typing . Please stop talking about [him]110-aaron . “ What are [you]3240-you guys doing tonight ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly asks . “ [The kids]3241-the kids are with [[their]3241-the kids dad]3242-their dad , and [I]111-molly could do with pizza and beer . Screw the diet and [the gym]3243-the gym . ”[111-molly] “ Yeah , [I]110-aaron ’m in , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron replies . “ Really ? ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i smile . [I]0-i ca n’t believe [they]527-they are asking [me]0-i out on [my]0-i first day . “ Yeah , why not ? Do [you]3240-you have anything else going on ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly asks . “ Well , seeing as [[you]3240-you two]3244-you two are [the only people [I]111-molly know in [New York]3-new york]3245-the only people i know in new york , what else could [I]111-molly possibly have going on ? ”[111-molly] [I]0-i shrug happily . “ Pizza and beer it is , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly replies as [she]111-molly continues typing . [I]0-i begin to scroll back through [my]0-i email list , and the name [Jameson Miles]119-jameson miles pops up as a sender . What ? [I]0-i glance around guiltily and click to open it . It ’s probably a welcome email sent to [everyone]3098-everyone . [Emily]91-emily , [You]91-emily are required in [[my]0-i office]529-my office at 8:00 a.m. tomorrow for a private meeting . Go through security and tell [them]530-them [you]91-emily are coming to see [me]0-i . [They]530-them will buzz [you]91-emily up to [my]0-i floor . [Jameson Miles CEO Miles]126-jameson Media [New York]3-new york “ What the hell ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ What ? ”[0-i] [Molly]111-molly asks . “ Nothing , ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer as [I]0-i minimize [my]0-i screen . Shit . What does [he]0-i want ? Just play dumb . [I]0-i write back . [Dear Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles , Would [you]114-mr. miles like [me]0-i to bring [my]0-i team ? [Emily]91-emily [I]0-i tap [my]0-i pen on the desk and look around nervously as [I]0-i wait for [his]0-i reply . [Emily]91-emily , No . [I]0-i do not want to see [[your]91-emily team]531-your team , nor do [I]0-i want [you]91-emily to tell [anybody]532-anybody about [our]533-our scheduled meeting . This particular meeting is of a private nature . [Jameson Miles Miles]126-jameson Media [New York]3-new york [My]0-i eyes widen . Oh [my]0-i God . . . private nature ? What the hell does that mean ? [I]0-i pinch the bridge of [my]0-i nose . [I]0-i need pizza and beer too . Hurry up , five o’clock . [The bar]534-the bar is noisy and a hive of activity , and [I]0-i can hardly wipe the goofy grin from [my]0-i face as [I]0-i look around at [all the people who have just come from work]535-all the people who have just come from work . [I]0-i ’m sitting at a bench table with [Molly]111-molly and [Aaron]110-aaron in [a sports bar]536-a sports bar , and [I]0-i ’m feeling oh so [New York]3-new york . It ’s a Monday night , and [I]0-i ’m out and about with what feels like [a million cool people]537-a million cool people . “ All [I]111-molly ’m saying , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly says as [she]111-molly chews [her]111-molly pizza , “ is that if [you]0-i did n’t see [him]110-aaron all weekend , and [he]110-aaron has no problem with that , there ’s an issue . ”[111-molly] “ Maybe [he]110-aaron was just busy , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron scoffs . “ Maybe [he]110-aaron ’s just lame , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly huffs . [We]538-we ’re discussing [[Aaron]110-aaron ’s new boyfriend]539-aaron ’s new boyfriend , and for some reason , [I]0-i feel comfortable enough to make [Aaron]110-aaron feel better about [his]110-aaron situation because [mine]0-i is worse . “ Well , get this . ”[0-i] [I]0-i finish [my]0-i mouthful . “ [You]0-i want to hear lame ? [I]0-i ’m dating [a guy [I]0-i ’ve crushed on since [I]0-i was thirteen years old]3246-a guy i ’ve crushed on since i was thirteen years old . [A football star who was only interested in [me]0-i after [he]110-aaron injured [himself]110-aaron]3247-a football star who was only interested in me after he injured himself . [We]538-we had a few great months together , but then [he]110-aaron dove into some kind of life crisis . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sip [my]0-i beer . “ [He]110-aaron does n’t know what [he]110-aaron wants to do outside of football . [He]110-aaron ’s unemployed with no prospects . [He]110-aaron lives in [[[his]110-aaron parents]3158-his parents ’ garage]3249-his parents ’ garage and just recently wrote [his]110-aaron car off . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shake [my]0-i head in disgust and pull [my]0-i phone out of [my]0-i bag . “ [He]110-aaron would n’t move here with [me]0-i because [he]110-aaron does n’t like [busy cities]3250-busy cities . [He]110-aaron did n’t call [me]0-i this morning to wish [me]0-i luck , and it ’s now”—I[0-i] glance at [my]0-i watch—“nine forty p.m. , and [he]110-aaron has n’t even bothered to call to see how [my]540-they first day went . ”[540-they] [They]540-they both groan in disgust . “ What the fuck are [you]0-i doing with [him]110-aaron ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron winces . [I]0-i sip [my]0-i beer with an eye roll and shrug . “ Who knows ? ”[540-they] [They]540-they both chuckle . “ Well , all [I]540-they want is some good sex . ”[540-they] [Molly]111-molly sighs . “ Every time [I]111-molly see [someone [I]111-molly ’m attracted to]3251-someone i ’m attracted to , [I]111-molly ’m with [the kids]3241-the kids . So then [I]111-molly ca n’t act on it . ”[111-molly] [I]0-i frown . “ [You]0-i would n’t introduce [anyone]295-anyone to [[your]0-i kids]3254-your kids ? ”[0-i] “ No . [[My]110-aaron God]3255-my god , [they]3254-your kids make [[their]3254-your kids father]3256-their father ’s life hell with [[his]3256-their father new girlfriend]270-his new girlfriend . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron laughs as if remembering something . “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . [Molly]111-molly smirks . “ [[My]111-molly children]3258-my children are so fucking naughty [you]0-i would n’t even believe . ”[111-molly] [I]0-i giggle . “ How old are [they]3254-your kids ? ”[111-molly] “ [Mischa]127-mischa is thirteen , and [Brad]128-brad is fifteen , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly replies . “ [They]3254-your kids ’ve decided between [the two of [them]3254-your kids]3259-the two of them that [they]3254-your kids are going to make life a living hell for [[their]3254-your kids father]3256-their father and [me]111-molly unless [we]3254-your kids get back together . ”[111-molly] “ How so ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i laugh . “ [Brad]128-brad has been suspended from [school]419-school twice this year , and now [Mischa]127-mischa is going off the rails too . A few weekends ago [they]3254-your kids each had [a friend]3096-a friend stay over at [[their]3254-your kids father]3256-their father ’s while [he]3256-their father and [[his]3256-their father girlfriend]3264-his girlfriend went out to dinner . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i listen . “ [They]3254-your kids got drunk from [[his]3256-their father bar]3265-his bar and cut the crotches out of all of [[his]3256-their father girlfriend]3264-his girlfriend ’s underwear . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron laughs , and [my]0-i eyes widen in horror . “ [And”—she]129-and”—she[541-she] sips [her]541-she drink—“when [[their]3254-your kids father]3256-their father asked [them]3254-your kids about it , [they]3254-your kids said that the underpants had rotted because [her]541-she vagina was contaminated . ”[0-i] [I]0-i burst out laughing . “ No . ”[0-i] [She]541-she shakes [her]541-she head in disgust . “ [I]541-she wish [I]541-she was joking . ”[541-she] [Aaron]110-aaron throws [his]110-aaron head back and laughs . “ [I]110-aaron fucking love [[your]110-aaron kids]3254-your kids , [man]3269-man . That ’s a classic . ”[110-aaron] “ No , it ’s a nightmare , ”[541-she] [she]541-she replies flatly . “ Why did [you]541-she divorce [him]110-aaron ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [You]0-i know , [I]541-she do n’t actually know . ”[541-she] [She]541-she thinks for a moment . “ [We]3270-we just kind of lost [our]3270-we way . [We]3270-we were both working so hard , so [we]3270-we were always too tired for sex . [We]3270-we had [two kids and a mortgage]3271-two kids and a mortgage . ”[541-she] [She]541-she shrugs . “ [We]3270-we never went on date nights or made an effort for [each other]351-each other . [I]541-she do n’t have a precise moment that [we]3270-we knew it was over . [We]3270-we just kind of fell apart . ”[541-she] “ That ’s sad . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh . “ [He]110-aaron met [someone else at work]3273-someone else at work , and [he]110-aaron talked to [me]0-i about it . Nothing had happened at that stage , and [he]110-aaron said [he]110-aaron told [me]0-i because [he]110-aaron wanted to fight for [us]3270-we to get back what [we]3270-we once had . ”[0-i] “ [You]541-she did n’t fight ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ No , ”[541-she] [she]541-she says sadly . “ And neither did [he]110-aaron . [We]3270-we just kind of walked away from [each other]351-each other . It was all too hard at the time . ”[541-she] [She]541-she thinks for a moment . “ [I]541-she regret it now . [He]110-aaron ’s [a great man]3275-a great man . And in hindsight , [I]541-she think a lot of the problems [we]3270-we had just come from getting older . Sex drive is something [you]3276-you both need to work at , but [we]3270-we did n’t realize that until it was too late . ”[541-she] [She]541-she smiles softly . “ [We]3270-we ’re [great friends]3277-great friends now . ”[541-she] Hmm . [We]542-we all fall silent . “ Lucky [you]0-i ’ve got [those kids]3278-those kids to cut up [your]0-i competition ’s underwear . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron smiles . [We]542-we all laugh out loud . “ Contaminated vagina . Where do [they]3278-those kids come up with this shit ? ”[542-we] [I]0-i hold the black dress up against [my]0-i body and stare at [my]0-i reflection in the mirror . Hmm . [I]0-i throw it and the coat hanger it ’s on onto the bed . [I]0-i grab the gray skirt and jacket and hold it up to [myself]0-i . Maybe black ? Shit . What the hell do [you]543-you wear when [you]543-you want to be sexy without trying to look sexy ? It ’s just now eleven o’clock , and [I]0-i ’m deciding what to wear to [my]0-i meeting with [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles in the morning . What does [he]114-mr. miles want to see [me]0-i about anyway ? [I]0-i think [I]0-i ’ll go with the black dress . [I]0-i lay it out on the chair . [I]0-i pick up [my]0-i patent leather pumps and put them on the floor under the dress . What earrings ? Hmm . [I]0-i twist [my]0-i lips as [I]0-i think . Pearls . Yes , pearls do n’t scream fuck [me]0-i like the gold ones do . Pearls are sensible working earrings . Right . [I]0-i ’ll wash [my]0-i hair and curl it in the morning . [I]0-i look at [my]0-i reflection and hold [my]0-i hair up in a high ponytail . Yes . . . high ponytail . [He]114-mr. miles likes high ponytails . Stop it . [I]0-i sit on the end of [my]0-i bed and look around [[my]0-i little apartment]544-my little apartment . [It]544-my little apartment ’s [one bedroom and on [the thirtieth floor]546-the thirtieth floor]545-one bedroom and on the thirtieth floor — tiny and quaint . [It]544-my little apartment is modern , though , and is in [a nice building]547-a nice building . [It]544-my little apartment ’s different from what [I]0-i ’m used to ; this [New York]3-new york – living thing is all so foreign , living alone and drinks and places to go on a Monday night . [I]0-i pick up [my]0-i phone and flick through [my]0-i messages . [[My]0-i three best girlfriends]548-my three best girlfriends all messaged [me]0-i tonight to see how [my]0-i day was . So did [[my]0-i mom]549-my mom . [Robbie]106-robbie did n’t . Sadness sweeps over [me]0-i . What ’s going on with [us]550-us ? Maybe [I]0-i should call [him]106-robbie . [I]0-i am [the one who left]551-the one who left , after all . [I]0-i dial [his]106-robbie number , and it rings . Eventually , [he]106-robbie picks up . “ Hey . ”[106-robbie] “ Hi . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ How are [you]106-robbie ? ”[0-i] “ Sleeping , ”[106-robbie] [he]106-robbie mutters . “ What time is it ? ”[106-robbie] [My]0-i face falls as [I]0-i glance at [my]0-i watch . “ Sorry . ”[0-i] “ Yeah , no matter . [I]0-i ’ll call [you]106-robbie tomorrow , [babe]3279-babe . ”[0-i] [My]0-i heart drops . “ Okay . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause . “ Sorry to wake [you]106-robbie . ”[0-i] “ Bye . ”[106-robbie] [He]106-robbie hangs up . [I]0-i exhale heavily . “ [My]0-i first day at work went great ; thank [you]106-robbie for asking , ”[0-i] [I]0-i mutter dryly . With a heavy heart and a stomach full of nerves , [I]0-i crawl into bed , and [I]0-i smile into the darkness as [I]0-i remember [my]0-i night with [Jim]90-jim . [I]0-i ’ve thought of [him]90-jim many times when [I]0-i ’m alone at night . [He]90-jim was hands down the most amazing sexual experience of [my]0-i life — not that [I]0-i ’ll ever admit that to [anyone]295-anyone , but [I]0-i know it [myself]0-i . [I]0-i ’m going to see [him]90-jim in the morning . [I]0-i feel the nerves dance in [my]0-i stomach . [I]0-i wonder what [he]90-jim ’s going to say ? [Jameson]126-jameson [I]0-i sit at [my]0-i desk and go through the folder , [Emily Foster]91-emily ’s file . [I]0-i read through [her]91-emily details , school grades , references , and then [her]91-emily application letter . Was this the job [she]91-emily was trying to interview for twelve months ago ? Buzz . [I]0-i press the intercom to security on [the ground floor]553-the ground floor , and [I]0-i glance up at the mirror on the wall and push the remote . It instantly turns into a television screen . “ Yes . ”[0-i] “ [We]3280-we have an [Emily Foster]91-emily here to see [you]0-i , [sir]3064-sir . ”[0-i] [I]0-i catch sight of [her]91-emily , and [I]0-i smile . There [she]91-emily is . “ Send [her]91-emily up . ”[91-emily] [I]0-i watch as [she]91-emily is led through to [the elevator]428-the elevator with [the guard]555-the guard , and [he]555-the guard puts [her]91-emily into [[my]0-i elevator]556-my elevator . [I]0-i make [my]0-i way out into reception , and soon the doors open , and [she]91-emily comes into view . “ Hello . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk . “ Hi , ”[91-emily] [she]91-emily whispers . [She]91-emily looks nervous . [I]0-i hold out [my]0-i hand and gesture toward [[my]0-i office]529-my office . “ Please come through . ”[0-i] [She]91-emily walks in front of [me]0-i , and [my]0-i eyes drop to [her]91-emily backside . [She]91-emily ’s wearing a black fitted dress , sheer stockings , and high - heeled pumps , and [her]91-emily hair is in a bouncy ponytail . . . just ready to drag down to [my]0-i . . . stop it . “ Take a seat , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say as [I]0-i sit down at [my]0-i desk . [She]91-emily takes a seat and clutches [her]91-emily bag on [her]91-emily lap as [her]91-emily eyes find [mine]0-i . [I]0-i swivel on [my]0-i chair as [I]0-i watch [her]91-emily . [She]91-emily ’s as gorgeous as [I]0-i remember , and a potent sexual aura oozes out of [her]91-emily like a concealed weapon . Long dark hair , brown eyes , and big fuckable lips . [I]0-i ’ve thought of [her]91-emily often — [she]91-emily was impossible to forget . [Nobody]3121-nobody has ever ridden [my]0-i cock the way [she]91-emily did , not before , not since . Not ever . The hickey on [my]0-i neck was n’t the only thing [she]91-emily branded [me]0-i with that night . “ [You]0-i wanted to see [me]91-emily ? ”[91-emily] [she]91-emily asks softly . The sound of [her]91-emily voice has a physical effect on [me]0-i . [I]0-i remember [her]91-emily sex talk and what a turn - on it was to hear [her]91-emily sweet voice say such dirty things . “ Yes . ”[91-emily] [I]0-i stare at [her]91-emily . “ [I]91-emily did . ”[91-emily] [Emily]91-emily was [the first woman [I]0-i have been with in a long time who had no idea who [I]0-i was]559-the first woman i have been with in a long time who had no idea who i was . Strangely enough , [I]0-i did n’t need to be [anyone]295-anyone that night . Being [Jim]90-jim was enough . “ What about ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i sit back in [my]0-i chair , annoyed with [her]91-emily attitude . [The majority of [women]300-women]561-the majority of women gush over [me]0-i — this one , not so much . “ What are [you]91-emily doing in [New York]3-new york ? ”[300-women] [I]0-i ask [her]91-emily to try to make polite conversation . “ [You]0-i asked [me]91-emily that yesterday , ”[91-emily] [she]91-emily snaps . “ Get to the point . ”[91-emily] “ [I]91-emily am asking [you]91-emily again now . Stop with the fucking attitude . ”[91-emily] [She]91-emily narrows [her]91-emily eyes as if annoyed . [I]0-i sit forward in [my]0-i seat . “ What is [your]91-emily problem ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i sneer . “ [You]91-emily . [You]91-emily are [my]0-i problem . ”[0-i] “ [Me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask , affronted . “ What did [I]0-i do ? ”[0-i] “ Do [you]91-emily have something work related to talk to [me]0-i about or not , [Jim]90-jim ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i glare at [her]91-emily . “ [You]91-emily ’re very rude . ”[0-i] “ [You]91-emily ’re very rich . ”[0-i] “ And ? ”[91-emily] [She]91-emily shrugs . “ What does that mean ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ Nothing . ”[0-i] [She]91-emily straightens [her]91-emily back . “ If [you]0-i do n’t have anything work related to talk to [me]91-emily about , [I]91-emily ’ll get going . ”[91-emily] [I]0-i clench [my]0-i jaw as [I]0-i stare at [her]91-emily ; the air crackles between [us]563-us . “ Can [I]91-emily see [you]91-emily tonight ? ”[91-emily] [Her]91-emily eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ No . ”[91-emily] “ Why not ? ”[91-emily] “ Because [I]0-i ’m [a professional]3282-a professional , and [I]0-i have no intention of mixing business and pleasure . ”[0-i] [I]0-i clench [my]0-i jaw to stop [myself]0-i from smirking . [My]0-i interest in [her]91-emily is growing by the second . “ What makes [you]91-emily so sure it would be a pleasure ? ”[0-i] “ History has a way of repeating itself , ”[91-emily] [she]91-emily whispers as [her]91-emily dark eyes drop to [my]0-i lips . [I]0-i get a vision of [her]91-emily naked and on top of [me]0-i in [my]0-i chair , and [I]0-i inhale sharply as [my]0-i cock begins to thump . “ History will be kind to [me]0-i , for [I]0-i intend to write it , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say . “ [Quoting Winston Churchill]130-quoting winston churchill now , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles ? ”[91-emily] [she]91-emily breathes . [I]0-i smirk , amused by [her]91-emily intelligence . “ [You]91-emily must look at the facts because [they]3283-they look at [you]91-emily . ”[0-i] “ [I]91-emily never worry about action , but only inaction , ”[91-emily] [she]91-emily fires back without hesitation . “ Exactly , so as [a fellow Churchill tragic]3284-a fellow churchill tragic , [I]91-emily demand [you]0-i have dinner with [me]91-emily tonight . ”[91-emily] [She]91-emily smiles and stands . “ [I]91-emily ca n’t . ”[91-emily] “ Why not ? ”[0-i] “ [I]91-emily ’m washing [my]91-emily hair . ”[91-emily] “ Why would [you]0-i want to wash it when [you]0-i could be getting it dirty ? ”[91-emily] [She]91-emily shrugs casually . “ [I]91-emily ’m just not interested in [you]0-i . [You]0-i ’re not [my]91-emily type . ”[91-emily] [I]0-i stare at [her]91-emily as [her]91-emily words roll around in [my]0-i head . Ouch . [I]0-i purse [my]0-i lips as [my]0-i eyes hold [hers]91-emily . That ’s the first time [I]0-i ’ve ever been flat - out rejected . “ Very well ; [your]0-i loss . ”[0-i] “ Maybe . ”[91-emily] [She]91-emily turns to leave . “ Nice to see [you]0-i again , though . [You]0-i must be very proud of [your]0-i achievements . ”[91-emily] [I]0-i rise and open the door in a rush . [She]91-emily looks up at [me]0-i , and [I]0-i clench [my]0-i hand at [my]0-i side to stop [myself]0-i from touching [her]91-emily . “ Goodbye , [Emily]91-emily . ”[0-i] “ Goodbye , ”[91-emily] [she]91-emily breathes as the air swirls between [us]564-us . “ Thanks for giving [me]91-emily a job . ”[91-emily] [She]91-emily smiles . [I]0-i nod once . It ’s not the only job [I]0-i have for [you]565-you . [She]91-emily turns and walks out and into [the elevator]428-the elevator , and [I]0-i slam the door and storm back into [[my]0-i office]529-my office . [I]0-i ’m not [her]91-emily type . . . since when ? [I]0-i hold the remote up to the security television screen and turn it back on . “ Get [me]0-i the fortieth floor , ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask the voice control . It flickers , and then a picture comes up with [the fortieth floor]431-the fortieth floor . [I]0-i watch as [she]91-emily steps out of [the elevator]428-the elevator . “ Follow [her]91-emily . ”[0-i] The camera follows [her]91-emily as [she]91-emily walks up [the aisle]570-the aisle and then to [her]91-emily seat at [her]91-emily desk . “ Camera above [that area]3285-that area , ”[0-i] [I]0-i command . The screen flickers , and [she]91-emily comes into view . [The office]444-the office is empty , and [she]91-emily takes out [her]91-emily phone and begins to scroll . [She]91-emily crosses [her]91-emily legs , and [I]0-i sit forward as [her]91-emily thigh becomes visible through the split . [I]0-i watch [her]91-emily as arousal swirls between [my]0-i legs . So . . . fucking hot . [She]91-emily ’s looking something up . “ Zoom in , ”[0-i] [I]0-i command . The camera zooms in , and [I]0-i squint as [I]0-i try to read what [she]91-emily ’s googling . [Jameson Miles]126-jameson . [I]0-i sit back and smile . Bingo . Chapter 4 [Emily]91-emily “ What about this one ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron smiles . “ [Hot firefighter]3286-hot firefighter rescues kitten from a drain . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug . “ [I]0-i ’ll do that story for sure . ”[0-i] [He]110-aaron smirks . “ [Me]110-aaron too . ”[110-aaron] “ What are [you]3287-you guys doing over the weekend ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly asks as [she]111-molly works . “ Nothing , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron replies . “ Hopefully seeing [Paul]131-paul . ”[110-aaron] “ [Me]0-i neither . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh . [Molly]111-molly looks up . “ [I]111-molly thought [you]111-molly were going [home]3076-home to see [[your]111-molly boyfriend]3289-your boyfriend ? ”[111-molly] [I]0-i shrug . “ Well , [I]0-i was supposed to , but [I]0-i ’ve spoken to [him]3289-your boyfriend for four minutes in total in ten days , and [he]3289-your boyfriend has n’t called [me]0-i once . ”[0-i] [I]0-i swivel on [my]0-i chair as [I]0-i consider [my]0-i depressing situation . “ [God]88-god , [you]111-molly need to dump [him]3289-your boyfriend and move on to [Ricardo]132-ricardo . ”[0-i] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . [Ricardo]132-ricardo works on [this floor]572-this floor , and for the last few days [he]132-ricardo ’s been loitering around [my]0-i desk and making idle chitchat . “ [He]132-ricardo ’s into [you]0-i , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly mutters . “ [He]132-ricardo ’s hanging around [your]0-i desk like a fly . ”[111-molly] “ It ’s a shame . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk as [I]0-i watch [him]132-ricardo talk to [someone at [their]573-someone at their desk desk]573-someone at their desk . “ [He]132-ricardo ’s actually very good looking . ”[0-i] [Ricardo]132-ricardo ’s Italian and has the whole tall , dark , and handsome thing perfected to a tee . Unfortunately , [his]132-ricardo personality is n’t half as pretty as [his]132-ricardo face . [He]132-ricardo ’s either making fun of [someone]401-someone or talking about [himself]132-ricardo in [the third person]575-the third person . “ Yuck . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron widens [his]110-aaron eyes in disgust . “ What would [you]0-i even talk to [him]132-ricardo about ? ”[110-aaron] “ [You]0-i would n’t talk to [him]132-ricardo — [you’d]0-i stick a ball gag in and fuck [him]132-ricardo stupid , ”[112-ava] [Ava]112-ava says as [she]112-ava watches [him]132-ricardo . “ [I]112-ava bet [he]132-ricardo ’s hung like a horse , ”[112-ava] [she]112-ava whispers . [We]576-we all burst out laughing . “ What are [you]112-ava doing this weekend ? ”[112-ava] [I]0-i ask [Ava]112-ava . “ [She]112-ava ’ll be chasing [rich boys]3290-rich boys , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron says . “ Damn right . ”[110-aaron] [My]0-i eyes flick to [her]112-ava . “ What does that even mean ? ”[112-ava] “ [I]112-ava hang out at clubs where [the men]434-the men have money . ”[112-ava] “ Why ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ [I]0-i am not ending up with [a broke loser]3292-a broke loser . ”[0-i] [My]0-i mouth falls open in horror . “ So . . . [you]112-ava would marry [a guy]321-a guy just for money ? ”[0-i] “ No . ”[112-ava] [She]112-ava shrugs . “ Maybe . ”[112-ava] [She]112-ava looks up . “ Oh no , here [he]132-ricardo comes , ”[112-ava] [she]112-ava whispers . [Ricardo]132-ricardo comes over and sits on the corner of [my]0-i desk . [The floor manager]577-the floor manager has gone [home]3076-home for the day , so [he]132-ricardo ’s not even bothering to pretend to work anymore . “ Hey there . ”[132-ricardo] [He]132-ricardo smiles . “ Hi , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply flatly . Please go away — [you’re]579-you’re embarrassing . “ [Ricardo]132-ricardo wanted to come and check on [[his]132-ricardo favorite coworker]3294-his favorite coworker . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stare at [the stupid human being]580-the stupid human being in front of [me]0-i . “ Why do [you]580-the stupid human being speak about [yourself]580-the stupid human being in [the third person]575-the third person ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . [Aaron]110-aaron snickers as [he]110-aaron pretends not to listen . “ [Ricardo]132-ricardo wonders why [you]0-i never come to [his]132-ricardo desk to see [him]132-ricardo . ”[110-aaron] “ [Emily]91-emily likes to get [her]91-emily work done , ”[0-i] [I]0-i mutter flatly . “ Oh . ”[0-i] [He]110-aaron laughs as [he]110-aaron points at [me]0-i . “ [Ricardo]132-ricardo likes [your]0-i style , [Emily]91-emily . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i begin to work , and [he]110-aaron stays sitting on the corner of [my]0-i desk while [he]110-aaron rambles , hardly coming up for air . Every now and then [the four of [us]581-the four of us]581-the four of us exchange looks , unable to believe what [a tool]582-a tool [this guy]289-this guy is . From the corner of [my]0-i eye [I]0-i see the elevator doors open , and then [I]0-i see [somebody]271-somebody run back to [[their]271-somebody workstation]585-their workstation . Huh ? [I]0-i look up to see [Jameson Miles]126-jameson striding down [the carpeted corridor]586-the carpeted corridor toward [[my]0-i desk]587-my desk . [His]126-jameson jaw is clenched , and [he]126-jameson is glaring at [Ricardo]132-ricardo . [People]267-people are standing up in [[their]267-people cubicles]589-their cubicles to see who it is , and when [they]267-people see [him]132-ricardo , [they]267-people immediately drop into [their]267-people chairs in fear . What the hell is [he]132-ricardo doing here ? [I]0-i watch in slow motion as [he]132-ricardo comes to a halt in front of [my]0-i desk . [Ricardo]132-ricardo glances over and then nearly swallows [his]132-ricardo tongue and stands immediately . “ [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles , ”[132-ricardo] [he]132-ricardo stammers . “ Hello , [sir]3064-sir . ”[132-ricardo] “ What are [you]132-ricardo doing ? ”[114-mr. miles] [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles growls . “ [I]114-mr. miles was training [[our]3297-our new employee]3298-our new employee , ”[114-mr. miles] [he]114-mr. miles splutters . “ This is [Emily]91-emily , ”[114-mr. miles] [he]114-mr. miles says , introducing [me]0-i . [Aaron]110-aaron ’s eyes meet [mine]0-i in horror . “ [I]114-mr. miles am well aware of who [Emily Foster]91-emily is and how often [you]0-i frequent [this desk]3299-this desk . This is [your]0-i first and final warning , ”[114-mr. miles] [he]114-mr. miles growls . “ Get back to work , and do not let [me]114-mr. miles catch [you]0-i here again . ”[114-mr. miles] The blood drains from [Ricardo]132-ricardo ’s face . “ Yes , [sir]3064-sir , ”[132-ricardo] [he]132-ricardo whispers . [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles glares at [him]132-ricardo and clenches [his]114-mr. miles jaw in anger . “ Go . Now . ”[114-mr. miles] [Ricardo]132-ricardo practically runs back to [his]132-ricardo desk , and [I]0-i stare at [the gorgeous creature in front of [me]0-i]590-the gorgeous creature in front of me . Gray suit , white shirt , paisley tie . [He]590-the gorgeous creature in front of me really is the epitome of suit porn . “ [Emily]91-emily , [I]114-mr. miles need to see [you]91-emily in [[my]114-mr. miles office]529-my office . Now , ”[114-mr. miles] [he]114-mr. miles snaps before [he]114-mr. miles turns and strides back toward [the elevator]428-the elevator , not bothering to wait for [my]0-i reply . [I]0-i swallow the lump in [my]0-i throat as [I]0-i stand . [Aaron]110-aaron ’s , [Ava]112-ava ’s , and [Molly]111-molly ’s eyes are wide with fear . “ What the fuck ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron mouths as [he]110-aaron squeezes [my]0-i hand in sympathy . [I]0-i exhale heavily and turn and follow [the office]444-the office god into [the elevator]428-the elevator as [everyone]3098-everyone watches . The doors close behind [us]595-we . [Jameson]126-jameson glares at the doors , and [I]0-i twist [my]0-i fingers nervously in front of [me]0-i as [we]595-we fly up through the floors . Oh man , [he]126-jameson ’s going to fire [me]0-i . [That stupid fucking Ricardo]596-that stupid fucking ricardo has gotten [me]0-i into trouble . This is all [his]126-jameson fault . [I]0-i was n’t even talking back to [him]126-jameson . . . [you]597-you know . When [we]595-we get to [the top floor]467-the top floor , the doors open , and once again [he]126-jameson strides off . [I]0-i hesitate . Does [he]126-jameson expect [me]0-i to run after [him]126-jameson ? [I]0-i ’m not [a fucking puppy]599-a fucking puppy . Who in the hell does [this asshole]600-this asshole think [he]126-jameson is ? [I]0-i fake a smile at [[his]126-jameson receptionist]601-his receptionist and storm in after [him]126-jameson . [He]126-jameson holds [the office]444-the office door open for [me]0-i , and [I]0-i brush past [him]126-jameson . [He]126-jameson closes the door and flicks the lock . “ What are [you]0-i doing ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson snaps . “ Is that a trick question ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i hold [my]0-i arms out wide . “ [I]0-i ’m standing in [[your]126-jameson office]3302-your office . What does it look like ? ”[0-i] “ [I]126-jameson mean , why the hell are [you]0-i openly flirting with [that idiot]3303-that idiot from [downstairs]3304-downstairs ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson demands . [My]0-i mouth falls open in horror . “ [I]126-jameson was n’t flirting . ”[126-jameson] “ Bullshit . [I]0-i saw it with [my]0-i own fucking eyes . ”[0-i] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ Do n’t tell [me]0-i [you]126-jameson dragged [me]0-i all the way up here to chastise [me]0-i about talking at [my]0-i desk while [I]0-i work . ”[0-i] “ [I]126-jameson am not paying [you]0-i to get hit on , [Emily]91-emily , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson growls . [I]0-i put [my]0-i hands on [my]0-i hips as fury begins to pump through [my]0-i bloodstream . “ Listen here , [you]126-jameson . ”[0-i] [I]0-i hold [my]0-i finger up . “ Firstly , [I]0-i ’ll get hit on by whomever [I]0-i want . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson narrows [his]126-jameson eyes and puts [his]126-jameson hands on [his]126-jameson hips , too , mirroring [my]0-i stance . “ [Secondly”—I]133-secondly”—i[126-jameson] put [my]0-i second finger up—“as [[my]126-jameson boss]3305-my boss , [you]126-jameson do not get to comment on [my]126-jameson dating life . ”[126-jameson] “ Ha , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson huffs as [he]126-jameson rolls [his]126-jameson eyes in disgust . “ Thirdly”—I[126-jameson] hold three fingers up—“I’m new in [town]3306-town , and [I]126-jameson have [no friends]3307-no friends , so if [he]126-jameson ’s being nice , [I]126-jameson ’m not going to be rude , am [I]126-jameson ? ”[126-jameson] “ Not on [my]126-jameson time , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson growls . “ Did [you]126-jameson really drag [me]126-jameson all the way up here just to say that ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i frown . “ No , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson barks . “ [I]126-jameson want to know why [you]0-i wo n’t go out with [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [My]0-i face falls . “ Are [you]126-jameson serious ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [Deadly]134-deadly . ”[0-i] The mood between [us]603-us changes and turns from anger to something else . “ Because [I]126-jameson ca n’t risk losing [my]126-jameson job if [we]603-us do n’t work out . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson stares at [me]0-i for a moment . “ That job interview [you]0-i were going for twelve months ago . Was it here ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i pause for a moment . Now [I]0-i ’m going to sound like [a loser]604-a loser . “ Yes . ”[604-a loser] “ How long have [you]126-jameson been trying to get a job [here]275-here ? ”[126-jameson] “ Three years , ”[0-i] [I]0-i huff . “ So forgive [me]0-i if [I]0-i do n’t want to throw it away for a one - night stand . ”[0-i] “ Why would [you]126-jameson think [I]126-jameson would fire [you]126-jameson ? ”[126-jameson] “ Is n’t that what [CEOs]3309-ceos do when [they]3309-ceos have finished with [[their]3309-ceos secretaries]3310-their secretaries ? Throw [them]3310-their secretaries to the side ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson frowns as [he]126-jameson watches [me]0-i . “ [I]126-jameson would n’t know — [I’ve]126-jameson never been attracted to [someone [I]126-jameson work with]3311-someone i work with . And besides , [I]126-jameson think [this place]459-this place is big enough that [we]3313-we could stay out of each other ’s way . ”[126-jameson] “ [You]126-jameson ’re still attracted to [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [You]0-i know [I]126-jameson am , and it ’s just dinner , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson snaps . “ [Nobody]3121-nobody would even know , and [I]126-jameson most certainly would n’t fire [you]0-i in the morning . ”[126-jameson] “ So . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i try to work out what the hell it is that [he]126-jameson wants . “ [You]126-jameson would keep [me]126-jameson a dirty little secret ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson steps forward so that [our]605-our faces are only an inch apart ; [our]605-our eyes are locked . Energy begins to spark between [us]605-our , and [I]0-i feel [my]0-i arousal sweep in . “ Were [you]126-jameson in a relationship when [we]605-our spent the night together ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ What makes [you]126-jameson say that ? ”[0-i] “ [You]0-i never asked for [my]126-jameson number . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson gives [me]0-i a slow , sexy smile as [he]126-jameson tucks a piece of [my]0-i hair behind [my]0-i ear . “ Does [everybody]3315-everybody ask for [your]0-i number , [Emily]91-emily ? ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson voice has dropped to a deep , sexy tone . “ Pretty much . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson was n’t looking for anything back then , and [I]126-jameson most definitely do n’t tell [people]267-people [I]126-jameson ’m going to call [them]267-people if [I]126-jameson ’m not . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson dusts [his]126-jameson thumb over [my]0-i bottom lip as [I]0-i stare up into [his]126-jameson big blue eyes . “ Tonight , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . [I]0-i smile softly as [his]126-jameson breath tickles [my]0-i skin . [He]126-jameson really is quite . . . “ [I]126-jameson ’ll pick [you]0-i up . Dinner at [[my]126-jameson favorite Italian restaurant]3317-my favorite italian restaurant . . . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson voice trails off as if [he]126-jameson ’s imagining something else . Oh , that sounds good . [I]0-i smile as [he]126-jameson leans closer . [His]126-jameson lips tenderly touch [mine]0-i as [he]126-jameson holds [my]0-i jaw in [his]126-jameson hand . [My]0-i eyes close as [my]0-i feet lift from the floor . [Robbie]106-robbie . . . what the hell am [I]0-i doing ? Damn [this man]327-this man . What is this spell that [he]327-this man has over [me]0-i that makes [me]0-i do the most random things ? Like one - night stands and forgetting [I]0-i ’m in a committed relationship . . . and breathing . Oh [my]0-i God . [I]0-i have [a boyfriend]526-a boyfriend . Shit . “ [I]0-i ’m so sorry if [I]0-i gave [you]126-jameson the wrong idea . ”[0-i] [I]0-i take a step back from [him]126-jameson . “ [I]0-i have [a boyfriend]526-a boyfriend , ”[0-i] [I]0-i blurt out . [His]126-jameson face falls in horror . “ What ? ”[126-jameson] “ [I]0-i know . ”[0-i] [I]0-i wince . “ [I]0-i . . . [I]0-i . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shake [my]0-i head because [I]0-i have no words that can get [me]0-i out of this . “ [I]0-i have [a boyfriend]526-a boyfriend , and [I]0-i ca n’t go out with [you]126-jameson . ”[0-i] “ Dump [him]526-a boyfriend , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson fires back . “ What ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i croak . “ [You]126-jameson heard [me]126-jameson . Dump [him]526-a boyfriend . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson reaches for [me]0-i . [I]0-i step back to create distance between [us]608-us . “ Are [you]126-jameson crazy ? ”[0-i] “ Maybe . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i ca n’t dump [a boyfriend]526-a boyfriend for one night of sex . ”[0-i] “ Yes . [You]0-i can . ”[0-i] “ [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[0-i] [I]0-i drag [my]0-i hands through [my]0-i hair . “ Have [you]126-jameson completely lost [your]126-jameson mind ? ”[0-i] “ Quite possibly . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson hands [me]0-i a business card . “ Call [me]126-jameson , and [I]126-jameson ’ll come and get [you]0-i . ”[126-jameson] [JAMESON]126-jameson MILES MILES MEDIA 212 - 639 - 8999 [I]0-i stare at the card in [my]0-i hand , [my]0-i mind a clusterfuck of confusion . [My]0-i eyes rise to meet [his]126-jameson . [I]0-i know what this is to [him]126-jameson — it ’s just another one - night stand . One night that could ruin every plan [I]0-i ’ve made for [myself]0-i and jeopardize [my]0-i career . [I]0-i ’ve worked too damn hard to get to [New York]3-new york to throw it away now for one night with [a player]609-a player . It ’s the weirdest thing — [I]0-i never picked [him]126-jameson as [a player]609-a player when [we]611-we were together , but the more [I]0-i get to know [him]126-jameson , the more [I]0-i realize [I]0-i never knew [him]126-jameson at all . The worst part about it is that [I]0-i know [Jameson Miles]126-jameson is the kind of drug that [I]0-i do n’t need an addiction to . The memory of [our]611-we night together is bad enough . “ [I]0-i ’m sorry . [I]0-i just ca n’t . ”[0-i] [I]0-i turn to walk out of [the office]444-the office . [My]0-i body screams for [me]0-i to go back , and then [I]0-i stop as a thought crosses [my]0-i mind . [I]0-i turn back toward [him]126-jameson . “ How did [you]126-jameson know ? ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson lifts [his]126-jameson chin as [my]0-i eyes search [his]126-jameson . [I]0-i walk back toward [him]126-jameson . “ How did [you]126-jameson know that [Ricardo]132-ricardo has been at [my]0-i desk ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i glance around [the room]613-the room and see nothing but a mirror on the wall . “ Are there cameras in [here]275-here ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Never mind . ”[0-i] “ Oh , but [I]0-i do , ”[0-i] [I]0-i sneer . “ [I]126-jameson think [I]126-jameson have a right to know , if it concerns [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson picks up a remote from [his]126-jameson desk and pushes a button . “ Give [me]126-jameson level forty , please , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson commands . The mirror turns into a television screen . It rolls a few times , and then a vision of [[my]0-i office floor]614-my office floor appears . [I]0-i see [Aaron]110-aaron and [Molly]111-molly and . . . [[my]0-i desk]587-my desk . What the hell ? “ [You]126-jameson ’ve been watching [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i gasp . “ Why ? ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson dark eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ Because it turns [me]126-jameson on . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson grabs [my]0-i hand and puts it over [his]126-jameson crotch , and [I]0-i can feel [his]126-jameson rock - hard erection in [his]126-jameson suit pants . The air leaves [my]0-i lungs as [I]0-i stare up at [him]126-jameson , and unable to help it , [I]0-i wrap [my]0-i hand around [his]126-jameson hard length . [We]616-we stare at [each other]351-each other as [our]616-we bodies ’ desires take over . “ [I]0-i just ca n’t , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [His]126-jameson hand cups [my]0-i face . “ [I]126-jameson want [you]0-i . ”[126-jameson] “ [You]126-jameson do n’t always get what [you]126-jameson want , ”[0-i] [I]0-i breathe . “ [I]0-i do . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson mouth drops to [my]0-i neck , and in slow motion , [he]126-jameson licks from [my]0-i collarbone up [my]0-i neck and then whispers in [my]0-i ear , “ Get rid of [him]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] Goose bumps shoot up [my]0-i spine , and [I]0-i step back , overwhelmed by the physical effect [he]126-jameson has on [me]0-i . [He]126-jameson grabs the erection in [his]126-jameson pants and rearranges it as [we]618-we stare at [each other]351-each other . “ [I]126-jameson ’ve got to get back to work , ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i breathe . [He]126-jameson glares at [me]0-i , [his]126-jameson face cold , and [my]0-i chest rises and falls as [I]0-i fight [my]0-i arousal . It ’s taking every inch of [my]0-i self - control not to jump on [him]126-jameson , right here , right now . [He]126-jameson ’s so hard under that suit . . . such a waste . No . [I]0-i turn and walk out , take [the elevator]428-the elevator , and before [I]0-i know it , [I]0-i ’m back down to [[my]0-i floor]621-my floor . [My]0-i heart is beating heavily in [my]0-i chest , and [I]0-i ’m in complete and utter shock . That may just be the hottest thing that ’s ever happened to [me]0-i . [I]0-i fall into [my]0-i seat , visibly shaken . “ Oh my God , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron whispers . [Molly]111-molly slides [her]111-molly seat over to [me]0-i . “ Holy shit , what happened ? ”[111-molly] “ [I]0-i have no idea , ”[0-i] [I]0-i murmur as [my]0-i eyes go to the ceiling . Where are the cameras ? [I]0-i think back to what angle [I]0-i saw on [his]110-aaron screen , and [I]0-i look in that direction and see it . A small black glass dome . [I]0-i glare at it , and [I]0-i know [he]110-aaron ’s watching [me]0-i . [I]0-i can feel [his]110-aaron eyes on [my]0-i skin . What ’s [he]110-aaron thinking about as [he]110-aaron watches [me]0-i ? An unwelcome wave of excitement rushes through [me]0-i as [I]0-i imagine [him]110-aaron up there , hard and watching [me]0-i . [I]0-i feel like taking off [my]0-i clothes and lying back on [my]0-i desk and opening [my]0-i legs to give [him]110-aaron something to really look at . Can [he]110-aaron hear what [we]622-we ’re saying ? Is there audio on that thing ? “ What happened ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron whispers . “ [I]0-i ca n’t talk now . There are cameras , ”[0-i] [I]0-i murmur with [my]0-i head down . “ But [we]622-we need to have some seriously strong drinks after work . ”[0-i] “ Jesus , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly whispers as [she]111-molly turns back to [her]111-molly computer . “ Stupid fucking [Ricardo]132-ricardo , ”[111-molly] [Ava]112-ava huffs . “ [He]132-ricardo ’s going to get [us]622-we all fired . Why did n’t [he]132-ricardo get hauled into [the damn office]3322-the damn office ? ”[112-ava] “ [I]0-i know . ”[0-i] [I]0-i open [my]0-i email and stare at it for a moment as [I]0-i try to calm [myself]0-i down . [I]0-i know exactly why . Because [Jameson Miles]126-jameson does n’t want to fuck [Ricardo]132-ricardo — [he]126-jameson wants to fuck [me]0-i . [I]0-i bite [my]0-i bottom lip to keep [my]0-i slutty smile from escaping onto [my]0-i face . [New York]3-new york is so fun . It ’s five thirty , and [we]623-we ’ve just left work and are standing on the curb outside [the Miles Media building]624-the miles media building while [we]623-we decide where to go for dinner . It ’s the weirdest thing ; it ’s as if along with this job , [I]0-i was gifted [three friends]625-three friends and unlimited options . Every night is Saturday night in [New York]3-new york . [We]623-we ’re [all different ages]626-all different ages , with different lifestyles , but somehow [we]623-we get along famously . [Ava]112-ava has a date and is n’t coming with [us]623-we , but [Aaron]110-aaron and [Molly]111-molly are by [my]0-i side . “ What do [you]110-aaron feel like eating ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly says as [she]111-molly scrolls through [her]111-molly phone . “ Something fattening and greasy . [Paul]131-paul has n’t called [me]111-molly . ”[111-molly] [Aaron]110-aaron sighs . “ [I]111-molly ’m off [him]131-paul . ”[111-molly] “ Oh God , will [you]110-aaron dump [him]131-paul already ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly huffs with an eye roll . “ [I]111-molly swear [he]131-paul ’s seeing [someone else on the side]3323-someone else on the side , and besides , [he]131-paul ’s nowhere near hot enough for [you]110-aaron . ”[111-molly] The front door of [the building]412-the building is opened by [a man in a black suit]628-a man in a black suit , and [the three of [us]629-the three of us]629-the three of us turn . [Jameson Miles]126-jameson walks out with [another man]630-another man . [The two of [them]3259-the two of them]3259-the two of them are deep in conversation and oblivious to [anyone else]632-anyone else . “ Who ’s that with [him]131-paul ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ That ’s [one of [[his]131-paul brothers]3208-his brothers]3324-one of his brothers , [Tristan Miles]135-tristan . [He]131-paul ’s in charge of global acquisitions , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron whispers as [his]110-aaron eyes stay glued to [them]3259-the two of them . “ [I]110-aaron swear to [God]88-god , [these men]3326-these men are so fucking hot it ’s unbearable . ”[110-aaron] [They]3259-the two of them have this charismatic air about [them]3259-the two of them , [their]3259-the two of them stances the epitome of power . [Everyone around [them]3259-the two of them]633-everyone around them stops and stares . Fitted expensive suits , handsome as all hell , cultured , and wealthy . [I]0-i swallow the lump in [my]0-i throat as [I]0-i watch in silence . In slow motion , [they]3259-the two of them walk out and get into the back of [the waiting black limousine]634-the waiting black limousine . [The driver]635-the driver shuts the door behind [them]3259-the two of them , and [we]636-we watch as [it]634-the waiting black limousine drives away . [I]0-i turn to [[my]0-i new friends]637-my new friends . “ [I]0-i really need to talk to [somebody]271-somebody . ”[0-i] “ About what ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron frowns . “ Can [you]3259-the two of them two keep a secret ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [They]3259-the two of them exchange looks . “ Yeah , of course [we]636-we can . ”[3259-the two of them] “ Let ’s get to the bar . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh as [I]0-i link [my]0-i arms through [theirs]3259-the two of them and begin to drag [them]3259-the two of them to cross [the road]638-the road . “ [You]3259-the two of them ’re not going to believe what [I]0-i have to tell [you]3259-the two of them . ”[0-i] [Molly]111-molly arrives with [our]639-our drinks on a tray and drops into [her]111-molly seat . “ So go . Did [he]110-aaron give [you]3259-the two of them a warning letter ? ”[111-molly] [I]0-i sip [my]0-i margarita . “ Hmm , this is good . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i inspect the icy yellow fluid . [Aaron]110-aaron sips [his]110-aaron . “ Ew , [I]110-aaron hate [this bartender]3328-this bartender . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron winces . “ Will [you]110-aaron stop whining ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly snaps . “ It ’s like hanging out with [[my]111-molly fucking kids]3329-my fucking kids . ”[111-molly] “ This drink is too strong , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron chokes . “ [I]110-aaron notice [you]110-aaron did n’t get one . ”[110-aaron] [Molly]111-molly ’s attention comes back to [me]0-i . “ Anyway , what ’s this secret ? ”[111-molly] [I]0-i stare at [them]640-you . [God]88-god , [I]0-i do n’t even know if [I]0-i should be saying anything to [anyone]295-anyone , but [I]0-i need [someone to talk to]642-someone to talk to . “ Promise [me]0-i [you]640-you wo n’t say anything to [anyone]295-anyone . Not even [Ava]112-ava , ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Yes . ”[0-i] [They]640-you both roll [their]640-you eyes . “ Okay , ”[0-i] [I]0-i continue . “ [You]640-you know how [I]0-i told [you]640-you [I]0-i have been trying to get a job at [Miles Media]12-miles media for over three years ? ”[0-i] “ Uh - huh . ”[110-aaron] “ Well , just over twelve months ago [I]110-aaron went to a wedding in [London]8-london , and [I]110-aaron was flying directly back to [New York]3-new york for an interview here . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron frowns as [he]110-aaron concentrates on [my]0-i story . “ At [the airport in [London]8-london]3331-the airport in london , [this fruitcake man behind [me]110-aaron in the line]3332-this fruitcake man behind me in the line was having some kind of episode and started throwing [my]110-aaron bag around . ”[110-aaron] [They]640-you both stare at [me]0-i , confused . “ Anyway , [the security guard]284-the security guard ushered [me]640-you to the check - in counter and told [the guy]3334-the guy to look after [me]640-you . [I]640-you was given an upgrade to first class . ”[640-you] “ How cool . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron smiles and raises [his]110-aaron drink happily . [I]0-i brace [myself]0-i for the next part of the story . “ [I]0-i was seated next to [this man]327-this man , and [we]3336-we began drinking champagne and . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug . “ The more [we]3336-we drank , the more inappropriate [we]3336-we got , and [we]3336-we began talking about [our]3336-we sex lives . ”[0-i] “ Did [you]0-i get kicked off [the plane]291-the plane ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron says , with wide eyes . “ No . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i sip [my]0-i drink . “ Could have easily , though . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron puts [his]110-aaron hand to [his]110-aaron chest in relief . “ Then there was a blizzard in [New York]3-new york , and [we]3336-we had to fly on to [Boston]11-boston for an overnight layover . [This guy]289-this guy was like . . . ridiculously hot . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i remember [him]110-aaron . “ [He]289-this guy was so not [my]110-aaron type , and [I]110-aaron was n’t [his]289-this guy , but somehow [we]3336-we ended up fucking like rabbits all night long . It was the best sex [I]110-aaron ’ve ever had in [my]110-aaron life . ”[110-aaron] “ [I]111-molly love this story . ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly smiles . “ Go [you]110-aaron . ”[111-molly] “ [I]111-molly never saw [him]289-this guy again . ”[111-molly] [Her]111-molly face falls . “ [He]289-this guy did n’t call ? ”[111-molly] “ [He]289-this guy never asked for [my]111-molly number . ”[111-molly] “ Ouch . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron winces . “ [I]110-aaron know ; so [you]111-molly can imagine [my]110-aaron horror when [I]110-aaron saw [him]289-this guy at work this week . ”[110-aaron] “ What ? ”[643-they] [they]643-they both gasp . “ Oh [my]110-aaron God , it ’s fucking [Ricardo]132-ricardo , is n’t it ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron frowns as [he]110-aaron takes a big mouthful of [his]110-aaron drink . “ [I]110-aaron ca n’t handle this story . Please do n’t tell [me]110-aaron [you]111-molly fucked [him]289-this guy , and [he]289-this guy gave [you]111-molly an STD . [I]110-aaron wo n’t be able to cope . ”[110-aaron] “ It was [Jameson Miles]126-jameson . ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly ’s eyes nearly bulge from [her]111-molly head . “ What ? ”[111-molly] “ Are [you]111-molly fucking kidding [me]110-aaron ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron gasps and accidentally snorts [his]110-aaron drink up [his]110-aaron nose and has a coughing fit . [They]644-they both stare at [me]0-i , wide eyed . “ When [I]644-they went to [[his]289-this guy office]496-his office on the tour , [he]289-this guy asked to be left alone with [me]644-they . ”[644-they] [Molly]111-molly shakes [her]111-molly head . “ Is this real ? ”[111-molly] [I]0-i nod . “ [I]111-molly have no words for this story , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly whispers . “ [I]110-aaron do — oh [my]110-aaron fucking God . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron hits [her]111-molly on the arm in excitement . “ What happened ? ”[110-aaron] “ [He]289-this guy asked [me]110-aaron out to dinner . ”[110-aaron] “ What the actual fuck ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly cries really loud . “ Shh , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i look at [the people around [us]646-us]645-the people around us . “ Keep [your]111-molly voice down . ”[0-i] “ Are [you]110-aaron serious ? ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly whispers . “ [I]111-molly said no . ”[111-molly] “ What ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron cries this time . “ Keep . [Your]111-molly . Voice . Down , ”[0-i] [I]0-i demand . “ [I]0-i ca n’t go out with [him]289-this guy . [I]0-i have [a boyfriend]526-a boyfriend . ”[0-i] “ [[Your]111-molly boyfriend]3289-your boyfriend ’s [a dick]323-a dick . [You]111-molly even said so [yourself]111-molly , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly stammers . “ [I]111-molly know , but [I]111-molly ’m not wired like that . [I]111-molly would never cheat on [somebody]271-somebody . ”[111-molly] [Aaron]110-aaron shakes [his]110-aaron head . “ [Jameson Miles]126-jameson could wire [me]110-aaron any way [he]126-jameson wanted to . ”[110-aaron] “ Right ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly agrees . “ What happened today ? ”[111-molly] “ [He]126-jameson marched [me]647-me up to [[his]126-jameson office]496-his office and accused [me]647-me of getting hit on in [my]647-me working time . ”[647-me] [Their]647-me mouths fall open in horror . “ And . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause . [I]0-i probably should n’t tell [them]647-me [we]648-we are being watched . [I]0-i ’ll keep that one to [myself]0-i . [I]0-i dig out [his]110-aaron card from [my]0-i wallet and slide it across the table , and [Molly]111-molly picks it up and stares at it . “ Even [his]110-aaron name is hot . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly reads the card out loud . “ [Jameson Miles]126-jameson . Miles Media . 212 - 639 - 8999 . ”[111-molly] “ [I]0-i told [him]110-aaron [he]110-aaron could n’t have everything [he]110-aaron wanted , and [he]110-aaron said [he]110-aaron does , and then [he]110-aaron licked [my]0-i neck , ”[0-i] [I]0-i blurt out . “ [He]110-aaron licked [your]0-i neck ? ”[0-i] [Aaron]110-aaron shrieks . “ Oh [Lord]3345-lord have mercy . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron picks up the menu and begins to fan [his]110-aaron face . “ Please tell [me]110-aaron [you]0-i ’re going out with [him]110-aaron tonight . ”[110-aaron] “ No . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug . “ [I]0-i ca n’t , and besides , it ’s the fastest way [I]0-i know how to get fired . ”[0-i] “ No job is that good , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron snaps . “ [I]110-aaron would n’t turn [him]110-aaron down to be [the fucking president]3346-the fucking president . ”[110-aaron] [We]649-we all giggle , and then [my]0-i phone vibrates across the table . “ Oh . . . [my]111-molly fucking God , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly whispers as [she]111-molly stares at [my]0-i phone . “ It ’s [him]110-aaron . ”[111-molly] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer as [I]0-i look down at the number lighting up the screen . [She]111-molly holds up the business card in [her]111-molly hands , and [we]649-we compare them . “ The number calling [you]0-i is fucking [him]110-aaron . ”[111-molly] [My]0-i eyes widen . Holy shit . Chapter 5 “ Answer it , answer it , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron cries . “ What do [I]110-aaron do ? ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i flap [my]0-i arms around in a panic . “ Holy fuck . Answer it , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly demands as [she]111-molly picks it up . “ Do n’t answer it , ”[111-molly] [I]0-i stammer as [I]0-i try to grab it from [her]111-molly hands . [She]111-molly holds it in the air and waves it around . “ Answer it , [woman]3347-woman , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly demands . [I]0-i snatch it from [her]111-molly and stare at it while it buzzes . “ [I]0-i ’m not going to answer it . ”[0-i] [Aaron]110-aaron snatches the phone from [me]0-i and hits answer . “ Hello , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron says in [a fake girl]650-a fake girl ’s voice , and then [he]110-aaron passes it over to [me]0-i . “ What the fuck ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i mouth . “ Hello , [Emily]91-emily , ”[0-i] [Jameson]126-jameson ’s velvety voice purrs . [My]0-i eyes widen as [I]0-i look at [[my]0-i friends]651-my friends ’ awestruck faces . [Aaron]110-aaron crosses [himself]110-aaron as if [he]110-aaron ’s in [church]652-church and makes a praying gesture . “ Hello . ”[110-aaron] “ Where are [you]0-i ? ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron asks . “ In [a bar]3348-a bar . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i glance around as [I]0-i hold [my]0-i hand over [my]0-i other ear to try to hear [him]110-aaron better . Shit , [I]0-i ’m not telling [him]110-aaron where [I]0-i am ; [I]0-i look like crap . [I]0-i hold [my]0-i breath as [I]0-i listen . “ [I]0-i want to see [you]110-aaron . ”[0-i] [I]0-i bite [my]0-i bottom lip , and [Molly]111-molly hits [me]0-i on the arm to snap [me]0-i out of [my]0-i nervous freeze . “ [I]0-i told [you]111-molly [I]0-i have [a boyfriend]526-a boyfriend , ”[0-i] [I]0-i blurt out . “ [I]0-i ca n’t see [you]110-aaron . ”[0-i] “ Holy fucking shit , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron mouths to [Molly]111-molly as [he]110-aaron scrunches [his]110-aaron hands in [his]110-aaron hair . “ And [I]110-aaron told [you]111-molly to get rid of [him]526-a boyfriend . ”[110-aaron] “ Who do [you]110-aaron think [you]110-aaron are ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . [Molly]111-molly and [Aaron]110-aaron listen intently . “ Go outside . [I]110-aaron ca n’t hear [you]111-molly , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron barks . [I]0-i stand and walk through [the bar]534-the bar and outside onto the curb , and it falls silent . “ That ’s better , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron says . [I]0-i glance up [the street]654-the street at [the cabs all in a row]655-the cabs all in a row . “ What do [you]110-aaron want , [Jameson]126-jameson ? ”[0-i] “ [You]110-aaron know what [I]0-i want . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i have [a boyfriend]526-a boyfriend . ”[0-i] “ And [I]0-i told [you]110-aaron what to do . ”[0-i] “ It ’s not that simple . ”[0-i] “ Yes , it is . Give [me]0-i [his]526-a boyfriend number , and [I]0-i ’ll save [you]110-aaron the job . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk at the audacity of [this man]327-this man . “ [You]110-aaron know , [your]110-aaron arrogance is a turnoff . ”[0-i] That ’s a blatant lie — not even close . “ And [you]110-aaron ’re [a turn - on]3351-a turn - on . [I]0-i ’ve been hard all day . Get over here , and put [me]0-i out of [my]0-i misery . ”[0-i] [I]0-i hear [my]0-i heartbeat in [my]0-i ears . Is this really happening ? [A drunk couple]657-a drunk couple totter past [me]0-i , and [I]0-i have to move so [they]657-a drunk couple do n’t run into [me]0-i . “ Sorry , ”[657-a drunk couple] [they]657-a drunk couple call . “ [I]657-a drunk couple ’m flying out to [California]15-california in the morning , ”[657-a drunk couple] [I]0-i blurt out . “ To see [him]3352-him ? ”[0-i] “ Yes . ”[657-a drunk couple] “ [He]3352-him stayed behind ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i scrunch [my]0-i face up tight . Damn it . Why did [I]0-i say that ? “ Yes . ”[0-i] “ When [you]0-i see [him]3352-him , [I]657-a drunk couple want [you]0-i to do something for [me]657-a drunk couple . ”[657-a drunk couple] “ What ’s that ? ”[657-a drunk couple] “ Ask [him]3352-him if [he]3352-him feels like [he]3352-him might die if [he]3352-him does n’t get to touch [you]0-i again . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ Why would [I]0-i ask [him]3352-him that ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Because there ’s [another man who does . ”[0-i] The phone]3353-another man who does . ” the phone clicks as [he]658-he hangs up . [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i stare at the phone in [my]0-i hand as [I]0-i feel tingles all the way to [my]0-i toes . Holy fucking shit . [I]0-i put [my]0-i hand over [my]0-i mouth ; [I]0-i ca n’t believe this . [I]0-i stumble back into [the bar]534-the bar to find [[my]0-i two friends]660-my two friends bouncing in [their]660-my two friends chairs as [they]660-my two friends wait for [my]0-i return . “ What happened ? ”[660-my two friends] [they]660-my two friends all but scream . [I]0-i slump and put [my]0-i hands in [my]0-i hair . “ [He]110-aaron wanted [me]0-i to go over to [[his]110-aaron place]3354-his place and put [him]110-aaron out of [his]110-aaron misery . ”[0-i] “ Holy fucking shit , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron cries . “ Can [I]110-aaron have [your]0-i autograph ? ”[110-aaron] “ Are [you]0-i going ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly stammers . “ Please tell [me]111-molly [you]0-i ’re going . ”[111-molly] [I]0-i shake [my]0-i head . “ No . ”[0-i] [I]0-i think for a moment . “ [He]110-aaron told [me]0-i to ask [[my]0-i boyfriend]3355-my boyfriend if [he]110-aaron felt like [he]110-aaron would die if [he]110-aaron did n’t get to touch [me]0-i again . ”[0-i] [They]661-they frown as [they]661-they listen . “ Because there is [another man who does . ”]3356-another man who does . ”[661-they] “ What ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly screeches . “ Oh holy hell , [we]3357-we need tequila . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly gets up and disappears to [the bar]534-the bar . “ [He]110-aaron asked [you]0-i to [[his]110-aaron place]3354-his place ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron squeaks . [I]0-i nod . “ Do [you]0-i know where [he]110-aaron lives ? ”[0-i] “ No . ”[661-they] “ [Park Avenue]21-park avenue , overlooking [Central Park]22-central park . ”[111-molly] “ How do [you]0-i know that ? ”[0-i] “ Google . [He]110-aaron used to live in [the One57 Billionaire Building]3359-the one57 billionaire building , but [he]110-aaron moved out of [there]3073-there and into [a building on [Park Avenue]21-park avenue]3361-a building on park avenue . [[His]110-aaron apartment]3362-his apartment is worth something like fifty million . ”[661-they] “ Fifty million , ”[0-i] [I]0-i gasp . “ Are [you]110-aaron serious ? How could anything be worth fifty million dollars ? That ’s just ridiculous . ”[0-i] [He]110-aaron shrugs . “ Beats [me]110-aaron . Must have gold toilets or something . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i giggle as [I]0-i get a vision of [someone sitting on a gold toilet]663-someone sitting on a gold toilet . [Molly]111-molly sits back in [her]111-molly seat and hands [me]0-i a shot of tequila . “ Drink this , and then go and fuck [him]110-aaron stupid . ”[111-molly] “ [I]0-i ’m not going , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ Well , what ’s the plan of attack ? ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly asks . “ Are [you]0-i playing hard to get ? ”[111-molly] “ No attack . [I]0-i ’m going [home]3076-home to see [Robbie]106-robbie tomorrow . ”[0-i] [I]0-i exhale heavily . “ [I]0-i need to sort out [our]3364-our relationship , and hopefully [he]110-aaron will come back with [me]0-i . ”[0-i] [Aaron]110-aaron rolls [his]110-aaron eyes in disappointment . “ Ca n’t [you]0-i at least be as excited about [Jameson Miles]126-jameson as [we]3364-our are ? ”[110-aaron] “ No . [I]0-i ’m not . And remember , not a word to [anyone]295-anyone . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sip [my]0-i drink . “ [I]0-i know exactly what will happen with [Jameson Miles]126-jameson . [I]0-i ’ll sleep with [him]110-aaron once , and then [he]110-aaron will move on to [[his]110-aaron next victim]3366-his next victim , and [I]0-i ’ll be conveniently fired . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shake [my]0-i head in disgust . “ [I]110-aaron ’ve worked too damn hard to get this job , and this is [the man who did n’t even want [my]110-aaron number the last time [we]3368-we slept together]3367-the man who did n’t even want my number the last time we slept together . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron turns up [his]110-aaron nose . “ God , why are [you]110-aaron so sensible ? ”[110-aaron] “ [I]0-i know , it totally sucks . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh . [Molly]111-molly ’s phone rings . “ Please let it be [Jameson Miles]126-jameson looking for a backup plan , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly huffs with an eye roll . “ Hello . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly frowns as [she]111-molly listens . “ Oh hello , [Margaret]136-margaret . Yes , [I]111-molly remember who [you]136-margaret are . [You]136-margaret ’re [[Chanel]137-chanel ’s mother]3369-chanel ’s mother . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly smiles as [she]111-molly listens , and then [her]111-molly face falls . “ What ? ”[111-molly] [Her]111-molly eyes widen . “ Are [you]136-margaret serious ? ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly pinches the bridge of [her]111-molly nose . “ Yes . ”[111-molly] It sounds like [she]111-molly ’s unable to get a word in . “ [I]111-molly can understand why [you]136-margaret ’re upset . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly narrows [her]111-molly eyes and shakes [her]111-molly head at [us]664-us . “ [I]111-molly ’m so sorry . ”[111-molly] [Aaron]110-aaron and [I]0-i frown at [each other]351-each other . “ What ’s happened ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i mouth . “ How explicit are [we]664-us talking ? ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly asks . [Her]111-molly eyes widen . “ Oh [my]111-molly God , [I]111-molly ’m so sorry . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly listens . “ No , please , do n’t go to [the principal]3370-the principal . [I]111-molly appreciate [you]0-i calling [me]111-molly first . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly closes [her]111-molly eyes as [she]111-molly listens . “ Once again , [my]111-molly sincere apologies . Thank [you]0-i . [I]111-molly ’ll handle it , yes . Goodbye . ”[111-molly] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . [She]111-molly puts [her]111-molly head in [her]111-molly hands . “ Oh [my]111-molly God . That was [[Chanel]137-chanel ’s mother]3369-chanel ’s mother , [the girl [[my]111-molly son]3373-my son is crushing on]3372-the girl my son is crushing on . [She]3372-the girl my son is crushing on went through [Chanel]137-chanel ’s phone and found provocative messages between [them]3374-them . ”[111-molly] [I]0-i bite [my]0-i lip to stop [myself]0-i from smiling as [I]0-i listen . “ That ’s pretty normal in this day and age , is n’t it ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i try to make [her]111-molly feel better . “ [I]0-i think [they]3374-them all do it . ”[0-i] “ How old is [this girl]3375-this girl ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron asks . “ Fifteen , ”[110-aaron] [Molly]111-molly cries . [I]0-i giggle as [I]0-i listen . God , [I]0-i ca n’t imagine what it ’s like to have [a teenage son]666-a teenage son . [She]111-molly dials [[her]111-molly ex - husband]667-her ex - husband ’s number . “ Hello , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly snaps . “ Go into [[[your]667-her ex - husband son]3376-your son ’s bedroom]3377-your son ’s bedroom , and grab [his]3376-your son phone , and throw the damn thing in the toilet . [He]3376-your son is grounded for life . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly listens . [Aaron]110-aaron and [I]0-i begin to giggle uncontrollably . “ [Michael]96-michael , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly says as [she]111-molly inhales deeply to try to calm down . “ [I]111-molly know [he]3376-your son ’s been seeing [her]111-molly , and [I]111-molly know [she]111-molly probably likes it . [He]3376-your son ’s fifteen years old , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly whispers angrily . “ Take [his]3376-your son phone , or be prepared for [me]111-molly to come over and smash it . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly hangs up in a rush and puts [her]111-molly head down on the table and pretends to bang it continually . [Aaron]110-aaron and [I]0-i burst out laughing , and [I]0-i put [my]0-i hand on [her]111-molly back . “ Do [you]111-molly want some more tequila , [Moll]111-molly ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask sweetly . “ Yes . . . [I]111-molly do . Make it a double , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly snaps angrily . [I]0-i stand at the bar as [I]0-i look over at the table , and [Aaron]110-aaron has [his]110-aaron hand over [his]110-aaron mouth in uncontrollable giggles . [I]0-i drop [my]0-i head to hide [my]0-i goofy smile . This is hilarious . . . because it ’s not happening to [me]0-i . “ Hey . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile as [Robbie]106-robbie opens [his]106-robbie front door . “ Hey , [you]0-i . ”[106-robbie] [He]106-robbie smiles as [he]106-robbie wraps [me]0-i in [his]106-robbie arms . “ This is a surprise . ”[106-robbie] “ [I]106-robbie know . [I]106-robbie was missing [you]0-i , so [I]106-robbie flew [home]3076-home this morning for the night . ”[106-robbie] “ Come in . ”[106-robbie] [He]106-robbie drags [me]0-i into [[his]106-robbie converted garage]668-his converted garage . [I]0-i could n’t sleep last night . [I]0-i was worried about [my]0-i feelings , and [I]0-i ca n’t stop thinking about stupid [Jameson Miles]126-jameson . [I]0-i got up and went straight to [the airport]276-the airport and caught [the flight]670-the flight out . [I]0-i look around [[Robbie]106-robbie ’s tiny studio apartment]671-robbie ’s tiny studio apartment and at the empty pizza boxes and dirty glasses lying around . “ What have [you]106-robbie been doing ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Nothing much . ”[0-i] [He]106-robbie smiles ; [he]106-robbie lies on the bed and taps it beside [him]106-robbie . [I]0-i lie down , and [he]106-robbie slides [his]106-robbie hand up [my]0-i top as [he]106-robbie looks down at [me]0-i . “ Did [you]106-robbie go to any job interviews this week ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Nah , nothing suited [me]0-i . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ Any job is a good job . . . is n’t it ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask hopefully . “ [I]0-i ’m waiting for the right one . ”[0-i] [He]106-robbie kisses [me]0-i softly . [I]0-i stare up at [him]106-robbie as [I]0-i feel [his]106-robbie erection grow up against [my]0-i leg . “ [Robbie]106-robbie , come back to [New York]3-new york with [me]106-robbie . There are so many jobs [there]3073-there , and it would be a fresh start for [you]106-robbie . [We]3380-we could discover [the city]3381-the city together . ”[106-robbie] [He]106-robbie snatches [his]106-robbie hand away from [my]0-i breast and pulls away from [me]0-i . “ Do n’t start [your]0-i fucking shit . [I]106-robbie told [you]0-i [I]106-robbie ’m not moving to [New York]3-new york . ”[106-robbie] [I]0-i sit up in a rush . “ What ’s stopping [you]106-robbie ? [You]106-robbie have no job here . What ’s holding [you]106-robbie back ? Explain it to [me]0-i . ”[0-i] “ [I]106-robbie like living [here]275-here . [I]106-robbie do n’t pay rent , and [[my]106-robbie mother]403-my mother cooks all [my]106-robbie food . [I]106-robbie have a good deal here . Why would [I]106-robbie leave ? ”[106-robbie] “ [You]106-robbie ’re twenty - five , [Robbie]106-robbie . ”[0-i] “ What ’s that supposed to mean ? ”[672-you] [he]672-you snaps . “ Do n’t [you]106-robbie want to support [yourself]106-robbie and experience something different ? ”[672-you] “ No . [I]0-i like it here . ”[0-i] “ [You]672-you need to grow up , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap , and [we]673-we both stand up . “ And [you]672-you need to come back to [fucking earth]3384-fucking earth . [The world]268-the world does n’t revolve around [you]672-you . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i want to live in [New York]3-new york . ”[0-i] [I]0-i take [his]672-you hand as [I]0-i try to get through to [him]672-you . “ [You]672-you should see [New York]3-new york , [Robbie]106-robbie . [You]672-you would love it there . [It]3-new york has this vibe like [I]0-i ’ve never felt anywhere else . ”[0-i] “ [New York]3-new york is [your]672-you dream , [Emily]91-emily , not [mine]0-i . [I]0-i ’m never moving [there]3073-there . ”[0-i] Oh hell . [We]674-we are worlds apart . “ How are [we]674-we supposed to be together from [different sides of [the country]3120-the country]3387-different sides of the country ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask softly . [He]672-you shrugs . “ [You]672-you should have thought of that before [you]672-you applied for this stupid job . ”[672-you] “ It ’s not a stupid job . ”[0-i] [I]0-i plead , “ Do n’t [you]672-you want to support [me]0-i in [my]0-i dream ? Are [you]672-you going to come and visit [me]0-i at all ? ”[0-i] “ [I]672-you told [you]672-you — [I]672-you do n’t like [cities]3389-cities . ”[672-you] “ So what [you]672-you ’re saying is , if [I]672-you do n’t fly back to [California]15-california , [I]672-you wo n’t see [you]672-you at all . ”[672-you] [He]672-you shrugs and sits down and picks up [his]672-you PlayStation remote . “ Are [you]672-you serious ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap as [I]0-i begin to see red . “ [I]0-i flew all the way [home]3076-home to discuss [our]3391-our future , and [you]672-you ’re going to play fucking Fortnite . ”[0-i] [He]672-you rolls [his]672-you eyes and starts the game . “ Quit [your]672-you nagging . ”[672-you] “ Quit [my]0-i nagging , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ [I]0-i do n’t want to live in [[[your]672-you fucking parents]3392-your fucking parents ’ garage]3393-your fucking parents ’ garage , [Robbie]106-robbie . ”[0-i] “ Do n’t , then . ”[672-you] “ What is wrong with [you]672-you ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i cry in outrage . “ Why do [you]672-you want to waste away here ? [You]672-you ’re twenty - five , [Robbie]106-robbie . [You]672-you need to grow up . ”[0-i] [He]672-you rolls [his]672-you eyes . “ If [you]0-i flew all the way back here to be [a bitch]3394-a bitch , [you]0-i need n’t have bothered . ”[672-you] Steam shoots from [my]0-i ears . “ If [I]0-i walk out that door , [Robbie]106-robbie , [we]3395-we are over , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say . [His]672-you eyes rise to meet [mine]0-i . “ [I]0-i mean it , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [I]0-i want [you]672-you in [my]0-i life , but [I]0-i wo n’t sacrifice [my]0-i happiness because [you]672-you are too fucking lazy to get off [your]672-you ass and make a future for [yourself]672-you . ”[0-i] [He]672-you clenches [his]672-you jaw and goes back to [his]672-you game . [He]672-you begins to play . [I]0-i watch [him]672-you through tears as [I]0-i hear [my]0-i angry heartbeat in [my]0-i ears . “ [Robbie]106-robbie , please , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Come with [me]0-i . ”[0-i] [He]672-you keeps [his]672-you eyes on the screen as [he]672-you begins to shoot [people]267-people in [his]672-you game . “ Close the door on [your]0-i way out . ”[672-you] [He]672-you puts [his]672-you headphones on to block [me]0-i out . [I]0-i get a lump in [my]0-i throat as [I]0-i finally see [our]676-our relationship for what it really is . A sham . [I]0-i take a long look around [[his]672-you room]677-his room as [he]672-you plays [his]672-you game , and [I]0-i know that this is it . The defining moment where [I]0-i decide what [I]0-i ’m worth . What [I]0-i want from life . [I]0-i ca n’t save [him]672-you . . . if [he]672-you does n’t want to be saved . What [I]0-i want is someone who wants to grow with [me]0-i , and [I]0-i do n’t even know what growth [I]0-i want . But [I]0-i ca n’t be stagnant here in [[[his]672-you parents]3158-his parents ’ garage]3249-his parents ’ garage any longer . [I]0-i do n’t even know who [he]672-you is anymore . . . but this is n’t [me]0-i . [The woman [I]0-i want]680-the woman i want to be lives in [New York]3-new york and has the job of [her]680-the woman i want dreams . [Sadness]138-sadness overwhelms [me]0-i . [I]0-i know what [I]0-i have to do . [I]0-i walk over to [him]672-you and take [his]672-you headphones off . “ [I]0-i ’m going . ”[0-i] [He]672-you stares at [me]0-i . “ [You]672-you ’re better than this , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [He]672-you clenches [his]672-you jaw . “ [Robbie]106-robbie , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [You]672-you ’re much more than just [a football star]3396-a football star . [You]672-you need to believe that . ”[0-i] [His]672-you eyes search [mine]0-i . “ Go and get some help . ”[672-you] [I]0-i look around [[his]672-you room]677-his room . “ It ’s going to be too late for [us]3397-us , but [I]0-i want it for [you]106-robbie . ”[0-i] [He]672-you drops [his]672-you head and stares at the floor . [I]0-i take [his]672-you hand in [mine]0-i . “ Come with [me]0-i , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Please , [Robbie]106-robbie , pull out of this . . . if not for [me]0-i , for [yourself]106-robbie . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i ca n’t , [Em]91-emily . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes fill with tears , and [I]0-i bend and kiss [him]672-you softly one last time . [I]0-i rub [my]0-i fingers through [his]672-you stubble and stare into [his]672-you eyes . “ Go and find whatever it is that makes [you]672-you happy , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [You]0-i too , ”[672-you] [he]672-you breathes sadly . [I]0-i realize [he]672-you does n’t even want to fight it ; [he]672-you knows this is for the best . [I]0-i smile at the bittersweet moment , and [I]0-i kiss [him]672-you softly , with tears rolling down [my]0-i cheeks . [I]0-i get into [[my]0-i mother]403-my mother ’s car and stare at [[his]672-you house]683-his house for an extended time . That was much easier and much harder than [I]0-i imagined . [I]0-i slowly start [the car]422-the car and pull out onto [the road]638-the road . [I]0-i wipe [my]0-i tears with [my]0-i forearm as [I]0-i feel a chapter of [my]0-i life close . [I]0-i drive down [the road]638-the road and out of [Robbie McIntyre]106-robbie ’s life . “ Goodbye , [Robbie]106-robbie , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper out loud . “ When it was good , it was great . ”[0-i] Monday morning “ And what do [you]687-the frail old woman think would happen if [you]687-the frail old woman told [the police]421-the police of [your]687-the frail old woman suspicions ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Nothing . Nothing at all , ”[687-the frail old woman] [the frail old woman]687-the frail old woman replies . [She]687-the frail old woman has to be at least ninety . [Her]687-the frail old woman white hair is in perfect finger waves , and [her]687-the frail old woman dress is a pretty shade of mauve . “ They ’re useless . ”[687-the frail old woman] [I]0-i dutifully scribble down [her]687-the frail old woman reply on [my]0-i notepad . [I]0-i ’m out in [the field]688-the field today , following up [my]0-i own lead . There has been a string of satanic graffiti on the fronts of [houses]689-houses lately , and [[this particular woman]690-this particular woman ’s house]691-this particular woman ’s house has been done three times . Fed up with the lack of support from [the police department]692-the police department , [she]690-this particular woman contacted [Miles Media]12-miles media , and [I]0-i was [the lucky one who picked up the phone]693-the lucky one who picked up the phone . “ So . . . tell [me]0-i when this all began , ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Back in [November]23-november . ”[687-the frail old woman] [She]687-the frail old woman pauses as [she]687-the frail old woman tries to remember . “ November sixteenth was the first time . A huge mural of the devil [himself]3399-himself . ”[687-the frail old woman] “ Right . ”[0-i] [I]0-i look up from [my]0-i notes . “ What did it look like ? ”[0-i] “ Evil . ”[687-the frail old woman] [She]687-the frail old woman gets a faraway look in [her]687-the frail old woman eye . “ Pure evil , so lifelike , with huge fangs and blood dripping everywhere . ”[687-the frail old woman] “ It must have been terrifying for [you]687-the frail old woman . ”[0-i] “ It was . That was the night when [a jewelry store]3400-a jewelry store got robbed around the corner , so [I]0-i remember it well . ”[0-i] “ Oh . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . [She]687-the frail old woman did n’t mention this before . “ Do [you]0-i think it ’s related ? ”[687-the frail old woman] [She]687-the frail old woman stares at [me]0-i blankly . “ The graffiti and the robbery , [I]0-i mean , ”[0-i] [I]0-i clarify . “ Do n’t know . ”[0-i] [She]687-the frail old woman pauses for a moment and then contorts [her]687-the frail old woman face as if in pain . “ [I]687-the frail old woman ’ve never thought of that before , but it ’s all making sense now . [The police]421-the police are in on this conspiracy . ”[687-the frail old woman] [She]687-the frail old woman begins to pace . “ Yes , yes , that ’s it . ”[687-the frail old woman] [She]687-the frail old woman taps [her]687-the frail old woman hand on the top of [her]687-the frail old woman head as [she]687-the frail old woman walks back and forth . Hmm . There ’s something off here . Is [this woman of sound mind]694-this woman of sound mind ? “ What did [you]0-i do when [you]0-i found the graffiti on [[your]0-i house]3402-your house ? ”[694-this woman of sound mind] “ [I]687-the frail old woman called [the police]421-the police , and [they]421-the police told [me]687-the frail old woman that [they]421-the police do n’t have time to come out for graffiti but to take a picture of it and email it to [them]421-the police . ”[687-the frail old woman] “ And [you]0-i did that ? ”[687-the frail old woman] “ Yes . ”[694-this woman of sound mind] “ What happened then ? ”[687-the frail old woman] “ [[My]687-the frail old woman son]3373-my son got [[my]687-the frail old woman house]3405-my house acid washed and removed it , but three nights later it happened again . But this time it was an image of [someone]401-someone getting murdered . [A woman]381-a woman had been stabbed . The graffiti was so intricate that it looked like a painting . ”[687-the frail old woman] “ Oh . ”[0-i] [I]0-i continue to take notes . “ What did [you]0-i do this time ? ”[0-i] “ [I]687-the frail old woman went down to [the police station]3408-the police station and demanded [someone]401-someone come and look at [[my]687-the frail old woman house]3405-my house . [[My]687-the frail old woman neighbor]3411-my neighbor had [[his]3411-my neighbor house]683-his house vandalized too . ”[687-the frail old woman] “ Okay . ”[0-i] [I]0-i scribble down [her]695-her story . “ What ’s [[your]687-the frail old woman neighbor]3413-your neighbor ’s name ? ”[0-i] “ [Robert Day Daniels]139-robert day daniels . ”[0-i] [I]0-i glance up from [my]0-i notes , surprised by [his]696-his name . “ [His]696-his name is [Robert Day Daniels]139-robert day daniels ? ”[0-i] “ Or is it [Daniel Day Roberts]140-daniel day roberts ? ”[695-her] [Her]695-her voice trails off as [she]695-her thinks . “ Hmm . ”[695-her] [I]0-i stare at [her]695-her as [I]0-i wait for [her]695-her to decide which it is . “ [I]695-her forgot [his]696-his name . ”[695-her] [She]695-her scrubs [her]695-her hands in [her]695-her hair as if about to launch into a panic . “ That ’s okay . [I]695-her ’ll just write [Robert Day Daniels]139-robert day daniels for the moment , and then [we]3414-we ’ll come back to it a little later . ”[695-her] “ Yes , okay . ”[695-her] [She]695-her smiles , pleased that [I]0-i ’m not pushing [her]695-her for an exact name . “ What was drawn on [[his]696-his house]683-his house ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ One of those horrible devil stars . ”[0-i] “ [I]695-her see . Tell [me]695-her , what did [the police]421-the police do this time ? ”[695-her] “ Nothing . [They]421-the police did n’t even come out here . ”[695-her] “ [They]421-the police ’re very busy , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reassure [her]695-her as [I]0-i write . “ Tell [me]0-i about the last time it happened . ”[0-i] “ [The entire house]3417-the entire house was painted red . ”[0-i] [I]0-i glance up in surprise . “ [The entire house]3417-the entire house was red ? ”[0-i] “ [The whole street]3419-the whole street . ”[0-i] Uneasiness sweeps over [me]0-i . “ That is weird . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . [She]695-her leans in close so that only [I]0-i can hear [her]695-her . “ Do [you]0-i think it ’s [the devil]3420-the devil ? ”[695-her] [she]695-her whispers . “ What ? ”[695-her] [I]0-i smile . “ No , it ’s probably just [kids]3421-kids acting up , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say , trying to reassure [her]695-her . “ Have [you]695-her told [anyone else]632-anyone else about this ? ”[0-i] “ No , only [Miles Media]12-miles media . [I]0-i want [you]695-her to publish this story so that [the police]421-the police will actually pay some attention . [I]0-i ’m getting scared that it ’s something more sinister . ”[0-i] [I]0-i take [her]695-her hand in [mine]0-i . “ Yes , [I]0-i think [we]3424-we have enough to go forward with the story . ”[0-i] “ Oh , thank [you]0-i , [dear]3154-dear . ”[695-her] [She]695-her holds [my]0-i hand tightly . “ Is there anything else [you]695-her can think of that may be relevant ? ”[695-her] [I]0-i ask . “ Just that [I]695-her ’m living in fear every night that [the devil]3420-the devil is coming back . [[My]695-her neighbors]3427-my neighbors said to go and speak to [them]3427-my neighbors too . ”[695-her] “ Okay , great . ”[0-i] [I]0-i hand [her]695-her [my]0-i card . “ If [you]695-her think of anything else , please call [me]0-i . ”[0-i] “ Yes , [I]695-her will . ”[695-her] [She]695-her clutches the card . [I]0-i go down [the street]654-the street and interview [seven more people]698-seven more people , and the stories all correlate . [I]0-i definitely have enough evidence to go forward . [I]0-i go back to [the office]444-the office and type the story up and hand it in to [Hayden]113-hayden . It feels good breaking news . [I]0-i sit at [my]0-i desk and stare at [my]0-i computer screen . It ’s four o’clock on Monday , and [I]0-i ’m in a funk . Since [I]0-i got back to [New York]3-new york late last night , [I]0-i ’ve had a bad case of the guilts . Even though [I]0-i knew that [Robbie]106-robbie and [I]0-i were reaching [our]700-we expiration date , [I]0-i kind of feel like [I]0-i sped it up and did n’t let it run its course . But then , on the other hand , [we]700-we ’d been stagnant for months , and if [I]0-i took this job knowing [he]701-he was n’t coming with [me]0-i . . . [I]0-i think [I]0-i subconsciously knew [we]700-we were close to the end . “ [The god]3428-the god is here , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron whispers . [I]0-i glance up . “ Who ? ”[110-aaron] “ [Tristan Miles]135-tristan , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron whispers . [I]0-i spy over the screening above [my]0-i desk as [he]110-aaron talks to [the manager of the floor]702-the manager of the floor , [Rebecca]141-rebecca . [He]110-aaron ’s wearing a pin - striped navy suit , [his]110-aaron brown wavy hair is in just - fucked perfection , and [he]110-aaron has this dreamy smile on [his]110-aaron face as [he]110-aaron talks . [He]110-aaron has the whitest teeth [I]0-i ’ve ever seen and huge dimples . “ [She]141-rebecca ’s giggling like [a schoolgirl]3429-a schoolgirl . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron frowns . “ [He]110-aaron ’s never on this level , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly says . “ What do [you]111-molly reckon [he]110-aaron ’s doing [here]275-here ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron whispers as [his]110-aaron eyes stay glued to the fine specimen . “ [His]110-aaron job , ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i reply flatly . “ [He]110-aaron does work [here]275-here , [you]110-aaron know . ”[0-i] The more [I]0-i think about it , the more [I]0-i know [I]0-i ’ve romanticized this whole [Jameson Miles]126-jameson thing . [He]110-aaron does n’t like [me]0-i — [he]110-aaron ’s just horny , and there ’s a big difference . [He]110-aaron ’s probably had sex with [five women]703-five women since Friday night when [I]0-i spoke to [him]110-aaron . [I]0-i have n’t heard from [him]110-aaron since , and [I]0-i do n’t want to either . [I]0-i did n’t leave [Robbie]106-robbie because [Jameson]126-jameson told [me]0-i to ; [I]0-i left [Robbie]106-robbie because [he]110-aaron ’d stopped putting in any effort . If [Jameson]126-jameson knows [we]704-we broke up , [he]126-jameson ’s going to assume it ’s because [I]0-i want to sleep with [him]110-aaron . . . and [I]0-i do n’t . [I]0-i really do n’t . [Stupid men]705-stupid men . [I]0-i ’m not telling [[my]0-i coworkers]453-my coworkers that [we]704-we broke up . [I]0-i do n’t want to make a fanfare of it . [I]0-i want to take [my]0-i time to get [my]0-i head around it . [Tristan Miles]135-tristan says something , and [Rebecca]141-rebecca laughs . Then [he]135-tristan disappears into [the elevator]428-the elevator , and [we]704-we all get back to work . [I]0-i struggle with [my]0-i umbrella as [I]0-i trudge down [the pavement]708-the pavement in the rain . [New York]3-new york is n’t as dreamy in the wet . [I]0-i grab the Gazette while [I]0-i ’m waiting for the lights to change and stuff it in [my]0-i bag . [I]0-i ’ll read this while [I]0-i wait for [my]0-i coffee . [My]0-i phone rings . “ Hello , [Emily Foster]91-emily speaking , ”[0-i] [I]0-i answer as [I]0-i power walk among [the crowd]287-the crowd . “ Hello , [Emily]91-emily , ”[710-a familiar voice] [a familiar voice]710-a familiar voice says . [I]0-i frown , unable to place who it is . “ Who ’s speaking , please ? ”[710-a familiar voice] “ This is [Marjorie]111-molly . [We]3432-we spoke yesterday . ”[711-the graffiti lady] Oh shit — [the graffiti lady]711-the graffiti lady . “ Oh yes , hello , [Marjorie]111-molly . It ’s a bad line , and [I]0-i could n’t hear [you]111-molly properly , ”[0-i] [I]0-i lie . “ It ’s [Danny Rupert]142-daniel , ”[711-the graffiti lady] [she]711-the graffiti lady replies . “ [I]711-the graffiti lady ’m sorry ? ”[711-the graffiti lady] [I]0-i frown . “ [[My]0-i neighbor]3411-my neighbor ’s name is [Danny Rupert]142-daniel . [I]0-i could n’t remember it yesterday . ”[0-i] [I]0-i screw up [my]0-i face and cringe . Oh God . [I]0-i hope it has n’t gone to print . [I]0-i completely forgot to go back to it . Panic begins to swirl in [my]0-i stomach . Shit . “ [I]0-i think the story has already gone to print , [Marjorie]111-molly . [I]0-i ’m so sorry [I]0-i did n’t recheck it with [you]111-molly . ”[0-i] “ Oh , that ’s okay , [dear]3154-dear . It does n’t matter — no harm done . [I]0-i felt foolish being unable to remember , and [I]0-i wanted to call [you]111-molly . ”[0-i] [My]0-i stomach rolls . It does matter — [you]712-you do n’t get names wrong in a story . Reporting 101 . Fuck . [I]0-i puff air into [my]0-i cheeks as disappointment in [myself]0-i runs through [me]0-i . Damn it . This is not a little mistake ; it ’s a major fuckup . “ Thanks for the call , [Marjorie]111-molly . [I]0-i ’ll call [you]111-molly when [I]0-i get into [the office]444-the office and let [you]111-molly know when it ’s running . ”[0-i] With any luck it wo n’t be until tomorrow , and [I]0-i will have time to change it . [I]0-i hang up and internally kick [myself]0-i . Damn it . Focus . [I]0-i walk into [the café opposite [the Miles Media building]624-the miles media building]713-the café opposite the miles media building and order [my]0-i coffee . [I]0-i drag the paper out of [my]0-i bag and slam it onto the table . [I]0-i am not going to hold on to this job with sloppy mistakes like that . [I]0-i ’m so annoyed at [myself]0-i . [I]0-i flick through the paper , and then something catches [my]0-i eye . Satanic Graffiti in [New York]3-new york A spate of bizarre graffiti attacks on [[houses]689-houses in [the West Village]717-the west village]716-houses in the west village has [the residents]718-the residents running scared . [[Marjorie Bishop]143-marjorie ’s house]719-marjorie bishop ’s house has been graffitied three times , and [the police]421-the police are refusing to take action . [Another resident]721-another resident , [Robert Day Daniels]139-robert day daniels , has been suffering too . [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i read the story . What ? [Marjorie]143-marjorie said [she]143-marjorie did n’t tell [anyone]295-anyone about this other than [me]0-i . [I]0-i read it again and again . [It]723-it quotes [my]0-i story almost word for word , and each time [I]0-i get more confused . Did [she]143-marjorie tell [another reporter the same wrong name]724-another reporter the same wrong name ? [I]0-i take out [my]0-i phone and dial [her]143-marjorie number , and [she]143-marjorie answers on the first ring . “ Hello , [Marjorie]143-marjorie , this is [Emily Foster]91-emily . ”[143-marjorie] “ Oh hello , [dear]3154-dear ; that was quick . ”[143-marjorie] “ [Marjorie]143-marjorie , did [you]143-marjorie speak to [anyone else from another paper]3437-anyone else from another paper about this graffiti story ? ”[143-marjorie] “ No , [dear]3154-dear . ”[143-marjorie] “ [You]143-marjorie have n’t told [anyone]295-anyone ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ Not [a soul]3440-a soul . [The street]654-the street and [I]0-i made a collective decision that [we]3442-we only wanted [Miles Media]103-miles media to report on it . That way [we]3442-we knew [the police]421-the police would have to listen . ”[0-i] [I]0-i begin to hear [my]0-i heartbeat in [my]0-i ears . What the hell is going on ? “ Coffee for [Emily]91-emily , ”[725-the cashier] [the cashier]725-the cashier calls . “ Thank [you]91-emily . ”[725-the cashier] [I]0-i take [my]0-i coffee and head back out into the rain , confused as all hell . It ’s one o’clock , and [I]0-i ’m on [my]0-i lunch break . [I]0-i arrive at [the top floor]467-the top floor and walk through to reception . “ Hello . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile nervously . “ [I]0-i ’m here to see [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles . It ’s an urgent matter . ”[0-i] [I]0-i ’ve been racking [my]0-i brain all day , and the only theory [I]0-i can come up with is n’t pretty . [I]0-i need to talk to [Jameson]126-jameson . [The blonde receptionist]727-the blonde receptionist smiles . “ Just a moment , please . [Your]114-mr. miles name is ? ”[727-the blonde receptionist] “ [Emily Foster]91-emily . ”[727-the blonde receptionist] [She]727-the blonde receptionist pushes the intercom . “ [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles , [I]727-the blonde receptionist have an [Emily Foster]91-emily here to see [you]114-mr. miles . ”[727-the blonde receptionist] “ Send [her]727-the blonde receptionist in , ”[126-jameson] [his]126-jameson velvety voice purrs without hesitation . [I]0-i feel [my]0-i stomach dip with nerves , and [I]0-i follow [her]727-the blonde receptionist out into [the corridor]728-the corridor and across the marble . Damn it , [I]0-i still have n’t bought rubber - soled shoes yet . [I]0-i try to tiptoe so [I]0-i do n’t click as [I]0-i walk . “ Just knock on the end door . ”[0-i] Holy shit . [My]0-i heart begins to pump , and [I]0-i force a smile . “ Thank [you]126-jameson . ”[727-the blonde receptionist] [She]727-the blonde receptionist disappears up [the hall]729-the hall , and [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes as [I]0-i stand in front of the door , bracing [myself]0-i . Okay , here goes . Knock , knock , knock . “ Come in , ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i hear [Jameson]126-jameson call . [I]0-i scrunch [my]0-i eyes shut as nerves dance deep in [my]0-i stomach . [I]0-i open the door , and there [he]126-jameson sits in a navy suit . With [his]126-jameson white shirt , dark hair , and piercing blue eyes , [he]126-jameson looks like [God]88-god ’s gift to [women]300-women . Maybe [he]126-jameson is . “ Hello , [Emily]91-emily , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers as [his]126-jameson sexy eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ Hello . ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson stands and stares at [me]0-i . [Our]731-our eyes are locked , and the air swirls between [us]731-our . “ Please , take a seat . ”[0-i] [I]0-i fall into the chair , and [he]126-jameson sits behind [his]126-jameson desk and leans back in [his]126-jameson chair ; [his]126-jameson eyes do n’t leave [me]0-i . “ [I]0-i wanted to see [you]126-jameson about something , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say as [I]0-i glance at the glass of scotch beside [him]126-jameson . [I]0-i do n’t know what kind of work has scotch involved , but where ’s [my]0-i glass ? [I]0-i could do with a drink or ten right now . [He]126-jameson sits back and smirks as if amused . “ Umm . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i pause and swallow the sand in [my]0-i throat . “ So something has happened , and [I]126-jameson know [I]126-jameson could get into trouble for it , but [I]126-jameson feel like [you]126-jameson need to know , ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i blurt out in a rush . “ Such as ? ”[0-i] “ [I]126-jameson got a name wrong in a story . ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson ’s unimpressed eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ But it ’s the weirdest thing , ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . “ Today [the Gazette]36-the gazette has published the same story . . . with [my]0-i error in it . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson frowns . “ What ? ”[126-jameson] “ Look , [I]0-i do n’t know , and [I]0-i could be totally wrong , and [I]0-i do n’t know why [I]0-i ’m even telling [you]126-jameson this , but [I]0-i think . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause . “ [You]126-jameson think what ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson snaps . “ [I]126-jameson just know for certain that [the Gazette]3444-the gazette did n’t get that story [themselves]3444-the gazette , and [they]3444-the gazette most definitely could n’t make the same mistake as [I]126-jameson have . [The old lady in the story]3445-the old lady in the story contacted [me]126-jameson directly because [she]3445-the old lady in the story would only talk to [Miles Media]12-miles media . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i put the Gazette down on the desk in front of [him]126-jameson , and [he]126-jameson reads it and stares at [me]0-i for a moment as if processing [my]0-i words . “ Are [you]0-i sure ? ”[126-jameson] “ Positive . [I]0-i got the name wrong . ”[0-i] [I]0-i point to the name where [my]0-i mistake was made . “ This here is [my]0-i error . ”[0-i] [Jameson]126-jameson brushes [his]126-jameson thumb back and forth over [his]126-jameson bottom lip as [he]126-jameson stares at the paper before [him]126-jameson , deep in thought . “ Thank [you]0-i . [I]126-jameson ’ll discuss this with [Tristan]135-tristan and get back to [you]135-tristan . ”[126-jameson] “ Okay . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stand . “ [I]0-i ’m sorry for making the error . It was unprofessional , and it wo n’t happen again . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes go to [Jameson]126-jameson , and [I]0-i wait for [him]126-jameson to say something . Is that it ? “ Goodbye , [Emily]91-emily , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says flatly . Oh , [he]126-jameson ’s dismissing [me]0-i . “ Goodbye . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i turn , feeling dejected , and make [my]0-i way [downstairs]3304-downstairs . [I]0-i do n’t know whether [I]0-i just did the right thing by telling [him]126-jameson [my]0-i theory . Maybe it will only work against [me]0-i . It ’s four o’clock , and [I]0-i ’m drinking [my]0-i afternoon coffee . [My]0-i phone rings , and [I]0-i answer it . “ Hello . ”[0-i] “ Hello , [Emily]91-emily , this is [Sammia]116-sammia . [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles would like to see [you]91-emily in [[his]114-mr. miles office]496-his office , please . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ Now ? ”[0-i] “ Yes , please . ”[0-i] “ Okay . [I]0-i ’m on [my]0-i way up . ”[0-i] Ten minutes later , [I]0-i knock on [Jameson]126-jameson ’s door . “ Come in , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson calls . [I]0-i walk in and find [him]126-jameson sitting behind [his]126-jameson large desk . [His]126-jameson face breaks into a sexy smile as [his]126-jameson eyes find [mine]0-i . “ Hello . ”[126-jameson] [My]0-i stomach dances with nerves . “ Hi . ”[126-jameson] “ Have [you]0-i had a good day ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks , and in slow motion [I]0-i watch as [his]126-jameson tongue swipes over [his]126-jameson bottom lip . [He]126-jameson ’s different this afternoon . [He]126-jameson has a playful air about [him]126-jameson . “ [You]126-jameson wanted to see [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Yes , [I]126-jameson ’ve spoken to [Tristan]135-tristan , and [we]3447-we have a special project that [we]3447-we would like [you]0-i to work on , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says as [he]126-jameson leans back in [his]126-jameson chair . “ [You]0-i do ? ”[126-jameson] “ Yes . [We]3447-we want [you]126-jameson to write a story to publish . ”[0-i] [I]0-i swallow the lump in [my]0-i throat . “ Okay . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug . “ What ’s the story on ? ”[0-i] [Jameson]126-jameson narrows [his]126-jameson eyes as [he]126-jameson thinks . “ [I]126-jameson was thinking . . . something along the lines of lovebites . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i frown in confusion . “ Love bites ? ”[0-i] Amusement flashes across [his]126-jameson face as if [he]126-jameson ’s trying to keep it straight . “ Lovebites , one word . Plural . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson for a moment in confusion . [I]0-i do n’t get it . Oh [my]0-i God . [He]126-jameson ’s talking about the hickey [I]0-i gave [him]126-jameson . Of all the nerve . Trust [him]126-jameson to bring that up . [I]0-i tilt [my]0-i chin to the sky in defiance . “ [I]0-i think [I]0-i ’m better equipped to write a story on premature ejaculation . That way [you]126-jameson could help [me]0-i with it . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile sweetly . [Jameson]126-jameson ’s eyes dance with delight . “ Is that so ? ”[126-jameson] “ Yes , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply straight faced . “ News stories are so much better when [they]3448-they have evidence to back them up . ”[0-i] Amusement crosses [his]126-jameson face as [he]126-jameson sips [his]126-jameson scotch . [I]0-i have no idea what ’s going through that head of [his]126-jameson this afternoon . Maybe [he]126-jameson ’s had too many scotches . [We]733-we stare at [each other]351-each other , and [I]0-i want to blurt out , “ Did [you]126-jameson ever think of [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] But [I]0-i ca n’t because this is work , and [I]0-i ’m acting uninterested . Actually , let [me]0-i rephrase that . [I]0-i ’m not interested — [I’m]0-i slightly fascinated . Huge difference . “ How was [your]0-i weekend ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks . “ Fine . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson eyebrow rises . “ Just fine ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i nod . “ Uh - huh . ”[0-i] [I]0-i do n’t want to tell [him]126-jameson that [I]0-i broke up with [Robbie]106-robbie , but then [I]0-i do n’t want to lie to [him]126-jameson either . “ [You]126-jameson got back Sunday night ? ”[0-i] “ Yes . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson eyes hold [mine]0-i , and [I]0-i know [he]126-jameson wants to ask about [Robbie]106-robbie and [me]0-i but is holding [his]126-jameson tongue . “ How was [your]126-jameson weekend ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Great , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson replies as [his]126-jameson eyes drop to [my]0-i lips . “ [I]126-jameson had a great weekend . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i frown . Does great mean just generally great , or does great mean “ [I]126-jameson had great hot sex with [a gorgeous , great woman]3449-a gorgeous , great woman all weekend ”[126-jameson] ? Stop it . “ Sorry about that , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan says as [he]135-tristan breezes into [the room]613-the room . [He]135-tristan smiles warmly and shakes [my]0-i hand . “ [I]135-tristan ’m [Tristan]135-tristan . ”[135-tristan] [He]126-jameson ’s slightly younger than [Jameson]126-jameson , and [his]126-jameson hair is a lighter brown and has a curl to it . [His]126-jameson eyes are big and brown . [He]126-jameson ’s very different from [Jameson]126-jameson but has that same power thing going on . “ [I]126-jameson ’m [Emily]91-emily . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ Hello , [Emily]91-emily . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson and [Jameson]126-jameson make eye contact , and at that moment , [I]0-i know that [he]126-jameson knows [Jameson]126-jameson and [my]0-i history together . [I]0-i swallow the nervous lump in [my]0-i throat . Why would [he]126-jameson have told [[his]126-jameson brother]736-his brother about [me]0-i ? [Tristan]135-tristan glances at [Jameson]126-jameson ’s scotch . “ What time is it ? Has happy hour started ? ”[135-tristan] “ Four thirty , and yes , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson replies . [Tristan]135-tristan goes to the bar and pours [himself]135-tristan a glass of the amber liquid . [He]135-tristan holds a glass up . “ Would [you]0-i like a drink , [Emily]91-emily ? ”[135-tristan] “ No thanks . [I]0-i ’m working , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply nervously . Amusement crosses [Jameson]126-jameson ’s face as [he]126-jameson lifts [his]126-jameson drink to [his]126-jameson lips . Okay , what the hell is that look ? Is it a condescending smirk or nearly a smile ? [I]0-i ca n’t read [this man]327-this man at all . [Jameson]126-jameson sits still and stares at [me]0-i . [Our]738-we eyes are locked , and the air swirls between [us]738-we . “ [You]126-jameson wanted to see [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . [I]0-i really do n’t know what kind of meeting has scotch involved . Maybe [I]0-i should have had a glass . God , no . Remember what [you]0-i did last time [you]0-i got drunk with [this man]327-this man . [You]0-i tried to suck all the blood out of [him]327-this man . “ As [we]738-we just discussed , [we]738-we have a special project [we]738-we would like [you]0-i to work on , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson says . [I]0-i nod as [I]0-i look between [them]738-we . “ Yes . In light of what [you]126-jameson told [me]0-i this morning , [we]738-we want [you]126-jameson to write a story for [us]738-we to publish . ”[0-i] [I]0-i swallow the lump in [my]0-i throat . “ Okay . ”[0-i] [I]0-i look between [them]738-we . “ What ’s the story on ? ”[0-i] “ Name a subject . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson tongue slips out and runs across [his]126-jameson bottom lip , and [I]0-i feel it all the way to [my]0-i toes . “ [We]738-we have a secret project coming up , and [I]126-jameson wanted [you]126-jameson to be involved , but [I]126-jameson need to know if [you]126-jameson can report on a subject . ”[126-jameson] “ [You]126-jameson know [I]126-jameson can . [I]126-jameson ’ve worked for regional papers for five years as [a reporter]3450-a reporter . ”[126-jameson] “ This is strictly off the record , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan says . “ [You]0-i can not tell [a soul]3440-a soul . It ’s imperative . ”[135-tristan] “ [I]0-i wo n’t , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say as [I]0-i look between [them]738-we . “ For some time , [we]738-we have thought that [somebody on [your]126-jameson floor]3452-somebody on your floor is selling [our]738-we stories to [[our]738-we competitors]3453-our competitors so that [they]3453-our competitors are breaking before [us]738-we . What [you]126-jameson told [us]738-we this morning all but confirms it . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ How do [you]126-jameson know ? ”[0-i] “ Trust [me]126-jameson ; [we]738-we know , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson replies . “ [Our]738-we stocks are falling and so is [our]738-we credibility . It needs to stop . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i listen . “ [We]738-we want [you]126-jameson to make up a fake news story and submit it through the normal channels , and [we]738-we will see if it turns up in [[our]738-we competitor]3454-our competitor ’s papers . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson as [I]0-i try to get [my]0-i brain to keep up . “ What would [I]0-i write about ? ”[0-i] “ Something worth selling . It does n’t have to be real . The faker the better — then it ’s more easily traceable . ”[126-jameson] “ Who do [you]126-jameson think it is ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask as excitement runs through [me]0-i . This is [my]0-i chance . If [I]0-i do well here , [I]0-i can prove [myself]0-i as [a valuable employee]740-a valuable employee . Imagine if [I]0-i cracked the case . [I]0-i bite [my]0-i bottom lip to hide [my]0-i smile . [I]0-i need to act as if exciting things like this happen to [me]0-i every day . “ [We]741-we have no idea , but [we]741-we know it ’s not [you]126-jameson . ”[0-i] “ How do [you]126-jameson know that ? ”[126-jameson] “ Because it began before [you]0-i started , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson says as [he]126-jameson stands and goes to the bar . “ Okay . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i think for a moment . “ [I]126-jameson could do that . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i look between [them]741-we . “ When do [you]126-jameson want the story by ? ”[126-jameson] “ Tomorrow afternoon , if possible . ”[126-jameson] “ Okay . ”[126-jameson] A voice comes through the intercom . “ [Tristan]135-tristan , [you]135-tristan have [London]8-london on line two . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson stands and pushes the button . “ Give [me]126-jameson a moment to get back to [[my]126-jameson office]529-my office . ”[126-jameson] “ Okay , ”[742-the receptionist] [the receptionist]742-the receptionist answers . “ Sorry , [I]126-jameson have to take this call . [We]741-we are settling today on [a new company]3456-a new company . [We]741-we ’ll talk more tomorrow afternoon , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says . “ Sure . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smile . Oh , [I]0-i like [him]126-jameson . [He]126-jameson ’s friendlier than [[his]126-jameson brother]736-his brother . [He]126-jameson shakes [my]0-i hand . “ Remember , not a word to [anyone]295-anyone . [I]126-jameson would hate to have to fire [you]0-i . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson gives [me]0-i a playful wink , but something tells [me]0-i [he]126-jameson ’s not joking . [I]0-i frown . What the hell ? “ Okay . ”[0-i] “ [I]126-jameson look forward to reading [your]0-i story , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says . [He]126-jameson turns and walks out of [the office]444-the office and closes the door behind [him]126-jameson . [I]0-i turn to [Jameson]126-jameson . [His]126-jameson eyes are dark , and [he]126-jameson ’s holding [his]126-jameson glass of scotch . [He]126-jameson sips it in slow motion , and [I]0-i smile nervously as [my]0-i heart begins to race . [He]126-jameson raises [his]126-jameson eyebrow and sips [his]126-jameson scotch again . The electricity in the air between [us]745-us is palpable . “ [I]0-i should get back to [[my]0-i desk]587-my desk , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [His]126-jameson eyes stay fixed on [me]0-i as if [he]126-jameson wants to say something , but [he]126-jameson remains silent . “ Is there anything else [you]126-jameson wanted , [sir]3064-sir ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i stand . [He]126-jameson puts [his]126-jameson drink down on the desk and walks toward [me]0-i . “ Yes , actually . There is . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson stops in front of [me]0-i so that [our]745-us faces are only an inch apart , and [I]0-i stare up at [him]126-jameson . [His]126-jameson close proximity steals [my]0-i breath , and like a wave in [the ocean]746-the ocean , arousal swims between [us]745-us . “ Can [you]0-i feel that ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson breathes . [I]0-i nod because it ’s undeniable . “ [I]126-jameson ’m so sexually attracted to [you]0-i that it ’s insane , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . “ From the first moment [I]126-jameson saw [you]0-i on [that plane]3460-that plane . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson as [I]0-i get a vision of [him]126-jameson throwing [me]0-i across [his]126-jameson desk . [He]126-jameson trails [his]126-jameson index finger down [my]0-i face , over the center of [my]0-i chest between [my]0-i breasts , and then lower to [my]0-i stomach , and then [he]126-jameson skims it over [my]0-i pubic bone before resting [his]126-jameson hand on [my]0-i hip . “ [I]126-jameson have a request . ”[126-jameson] “ Yes . ”[0-i] [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes as [I]0-i feel [myself]0-i melt under [his]126-jameson touch . [He]126-jameson leans forward so that [his]126-jameson lips are almost touching [my]0-i ear . [His]126-jameson breath tickles and sends goose bumps down [my]0-i spine . “ [I]126-jameson want [you]0-i to wear [your]0-i gray skirt tomorrow , the one with the split . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i listen to [his]126-jameson whispered words . “ [Your]0-i white silk blouse , and the lace bra that [you]0-i wear underneath it . ”[126-jameson] Holy shit . . . “ No stockings . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson hand grips [my]0-i hip bone , and [I]0-i clench [my]0-i sex . [He]126-jameson licks [my]0-i ear . “ [I]126-jameson want [you]0-i to wear [your]0-i hair in a ponytail so [I]126-jameson can wrap it around [my]126-jameson hand . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i get a vision of [him]126-jameson wrapping [my]0-i ponytail around [his]126-jameson hand , and [I]0-i nearly combust . [This man]327-this man is [a god]385-a god . [I]0-i stare up at [him]126-jameson . “ Anything else ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i breathe . “ Yes . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson eyes darken , and [he]126-jameson reaches up and rubs [his]126-jameson pointer finger over [my]0-i bottom lip . “ Tonight , [I]126-jameson want [you]0-i to take [your]0-i vibrator . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson voice is deep and hushed and doing things to [my]0-i insides that [I]0-i did n’t know were possible . [My]0-i eyes widen as [he]126-jameson slightly parts [my]0-i lips with [his]126-jameson finger . Then [he]126-jameson puts it in [my]0-i mouth , and [I]0-i find [myself]0-i sucking it . [His]126-jameson eyes darken as [he]126-jameson watches [me]0-i , and a slow , sexy smile crosses [his]126-jameson face . “ [I]126-jameson want [you]0-i to fuck [yourself]0-i . Long . . . deep and slow . ”[126-jameson] Oh . . . [Lord]749-lord have mercy . “ Why would [I]0-i do that ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i breathe . “ Because [I]126-jameson know it will be [my]126-jameson face that [you]0-i will see when [you]0-i come . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson bends and licks up [my]0-i neck , and then [he]126-jameson bites [my]0-i ear , and [my]0-i legs nearly buckle underneath [me]0-i . “ Do [your]0-i homework , and [you]0-i will be well rewarded , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers in [my]0-i ear before tenderly kissing [my]0-i neck with an open mouth . [I]0-i ’m like putty in [his]126-jameson hands . [I]0-i ca n’t even pretend to fight this . . . whatever this is . [He]126-jameson dusts [his]126-jameson lips across [mine]0-i but then steps back , and [my]0-i body jerks at [his]126-jameson withdrawal . [I]0-i pant as [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson . “ Do [your]0-i homework , [Emily]91-emily . [I]0-i ’ll see [you]0-i tomorrow . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson for a moment ; [he]126-jameson ’s dismissing [me]0-i . [I]0-i frown as [he]126-jameson turns and goes back to sit at [his]126-jameson desk as if nothing ever happened . [He]126-jameson picks up [his]126-jameson scotch and sips it as [his]126-jameson eyes hold [mine]0-i . [He]126-jameson slides a security key across the desk . “ This will get [you]0-i to this floor . ”[126-jameson] Huh . What in the hell was that ? [I]0-i snatch the key and leave [[his]126-jameson office]496-his office in a fluster . [I]0-i get into [the elevator]428-the elevator with [my]0-i heart hammering . For fuck ’s sake . [I]0-i need to find some self - control , and [I]0-i need to find it quick . Because [he]126-jameson has it all . Chapter 6 [I]0-i sit in [the café across [the road]638-the road from [the Miles Media building]624-the miles media building]752-the café across the road from the miles media building . [I]0-i told [myself]0-i [I]0-i came here to get some takeout for dinner . But the truth is , [I]0-i want to see [him]126-jameson leave . [I]0-i want to see [his]126-jameson face , to see if it ’s as flushed as [mine]0-i . [I]0-i ’m so close to orgasming in public ; it ’s not even funny . How can one finger through clothes arouse [me]0-i so much ? [This man]327-this man turns [me]0-i into a puddle , a wet , soppy , pliable puddle . [I]0-i have absolutely no resistance when [he]327-this man touches [me]0-i . For twelve months [I]0-i ’ve dreamed about [Jim]90-jim , [the funny , carefree man [I]0-i spent the night with]756-the funny , carefree man i spent the night with . And now that [I]0-i ’ve met [another version of [him]90-jim]757-another version of him , [I]0-i ’m not sure that [I]0-i like [him]90-jim . [I]0-i mean , [he]90-jim ’s hot , hotter than hot . Blazing fucking inferno . Who is [Jameson Miles]126-jameson ? [I]0-i sit on the bench seat by the window and stare across [the street]654-the street , and then [I]0-i see [the limousine]759-the limousine arrive and pull into [the parking bay]760-the parking bay . [I]0-i sit up . [My]0-i stomach flips , and [I]0-i hold [my]0-i breath as [I]0-i watch the door open . In slow motion [he]90-jim walks out ; [he]90-jim ’s like [a rock star]292-a rock star , and [everyone]3098-everyone turns to watch [him]90-jim . Mr. Orgasmic . [I]0-i watch as [he]90-jim gets into the back of [the limousine]759-the limousine and [the driver]635-the driver closes the door behind [him]90-jim , and then [it]759-the limousine slowly pulls away . [I]0-i watch it all the way up [the street]654-the street as it disappears , and [I]0-i feel a wave of disappointment roll over [me]0-i . [I]0-i wonder what [he]90-jim ’s doing tonight . It ’s late , nearly six thirty , and [the Miles Media building]624-the miles media building is emptied out for the day . [I]0-i ca n’t believe [I]0-i waited around to get a glimpse of [him]90-jim leaving . . . what [a loser]604-a loser . [I]0-i guess [I]0-i may as well order something to eat here . [I]0-i ’m only going to go and eat alone at [home]3076-home anyway . [I]0-i pick up the menu and scan the choices , and then the front doors of [Miles Media]12-miles media open again , and [Tristan]135-tristan walks out . [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i watch [him]90-jim . [He]90-jim ’s with [a woman]381-a woman ; [she]381-a woman ’s blonde and beautiful and wearing a gray woolen fitted dress and high - heeled short black boots . [She]381-a woman has a trendy vibe about [her]381-a woman , and [her]381-a woman hair is in a bouncy ponytail . [She]381-a woman says something , and [he]90-jim laughs out loud . [They]770-they walk around the corner but are still in [my]0-i view , and [he]90-jim puts [his]90-jim hand on [her]381-a woman behind and leans in and kisses [her]381-a woman . Who is [she]381-a woman ? [He]90-jim then takes [her]381-a woman hand in [his]90-jim , and [they]770-they disappear up [the street]654-the street together . Does [she]381-a woman work in [the building]412-the building ? [I]0-i would have thought [they]770-they had [some no - dating - the - staff]773-some no - dating - the - staff kind of rule . Maybe not ? Maybe it ’s a free - for - all , and [they]770-they ’re fucking [their]770-they way through [the floors]774-the floors ? Am [I]0-i [the only girl [he]90-jim ’s flirting with]775-the only girl he ’s flirting with ? Does [he]90-jim summon anyone else up to [[his]90-jim office]496-his office ? [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes in disgust . Stop it . God , [I]0-i need to get a grip . [I]0-i go through [my]0-i wardrobe and take out [my]0-i clothes for tomorrow . It ’s late , and [I]0-i ’ve been working on that story that [they]770-they want . [I]0-i hope it ’s all right . [My]0-i preparation is different this time . What should [I]0-i wear tomorrow ? Do [I]0-i do as [I]0-i was told ? [I]0-i lay out the clothes [Jameson]126-jameson told [me]0-i to wear , and [I]0-i stare at them on [my]0-i bed . The gray skirt with the split , the white silk shirt . How does [he]90-jim know that [I]0-i wear a white lace bra with this shirt ? How does [he]90-jim even know about this outfit ? [He]90-jim watches [me]0-i . A sick thrill runs through [me]0-i . Fuck , [this guy]289-this guy is playing with [my]0-i head . [I]0-i ’m walking around , a raging mass of hormones , and [he]90-jim hardly touches [me]0-i . Imagine if [he]90-jim did . [I]0-i think back to this afternoon and the way [his]90-jim finger traced [my]0-i body and then how [he]90-jim put it in [my]0-i mouth and [I]0-i sucked on it . [His]90-jim words come back to [me]0-i . [I]0-i want [you]0-i to fuck [yourself]0-i . Long . . . deep and slow . [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes as arousal begins to heat [my]0-i blood . [He]90-jim wants [me]0-i to think of [him]90-jim while [I]0-i come . [I]0-i go to [my]0-i bedside and take out [my]0-i vibrator , and [I]0-i hold it in [my]0-i hand and look at it . “ It ’s a very cold substitute , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper into the silence . [I]0-i have a good mind to call [him]90-jim and tell [him]90-jim to come over and get the job done in person . But of course [I]0-i wo n’t . [I]0-i turn off the light and crawl under the covers , and [my]0-i hand brushes across [my]0-i naked breast . [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes and open [my]0-i legs and imagine [Jameson Miles]126-jameson is here with [me]0-i . “ Do [you]3461-you guys want to get some dinner after work ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask [Molly]111-molly and [Aaron]110-aaron . “ Yeah , all right . Something healthy , though , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly replies as [she]111-molly types . “ [I]111-molly ’m never going to get laid if [I]111-molly do n’t start working on this fat ass . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly types some more . “ [I]111-molly have to be done by eight , though . [I]111-molly have to pick up [the kids]3241-the kids . ”[111-molly] “ Yeah , okay . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron sighs . “ Sounds good . ”[110-aaron] “ [I]0-i have training this afternoon , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply as [I]0-i try to sound casual . [They]778-they both look up from [their]778-they work . “ Where ? ”[778-they] “ In [the management offices]3231-the management offices . ”[0-i] “ Oh [my]111-molly God . ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly smirks . “ Did [he]110-aaron say anything ? ”[111-molly] [I]0-i drop [my]0-i head . [I]0-i glance up at the cameras . “ [I]0-i ’ll tell [you]778-they tonight . ”[0-i] “ God , [I]110-aaron live for these stories , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron whispers . “ Please tell [me]110-aaron [you]110-aaron fucked [him]110-aaron on [his]110-aaron desk ? ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i giggle as [I]0-i finalize what [I]0-i ’m doing . “ No , do n’t be stupid . ”[0-i] [I]0-i grab [my]0-i manila folder with [my]0-i fake news story . “ [I]0-i ’ll see [[you]779-you guys]3464-you guys later . ”[0-i] [They]779-you both look up at [me]0-i and smirk . “ Good luck . ”[779-you] In five minutes , [I]0-i find [myself]0-i on the top floor with a ferociously beating heart . [I]0-i decided not to wear what [he]110-aaron told [me]0-i to wear ; that ’s just way too eager . What makes [him]110-aaron think [he]110-aaron can tell [me]0-i what to wear , anyway ? [Sammia]116-sammia smiles when [she]116-sammia sees [me]0-i . “ [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles , [you]114-mr. miles have [Emily Foster]91-emily here to see [you]114-mr. miles . ”[116-sammia] “ Send [her]91-emily in , ”[110-aaron] [his]110-aaron velvety voice replies . [I]0-i walk through [the marble hall]780-the marble hall on [my]0-i tiptoes as [I]0-i make another mental note to buy rubber - soled shoes . How do [I]0-i keep forgetting to do this ? [I]0-i knock on [his]110-aaron door . “ Come in , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron calls . [I]0-i open the door and find [him]110-aaron sitting at [his]110-aaron desk on the phone ; [his]110-aaron eyes find [mine]0-i . “ Hello , [Emily]91-emily , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron mouths . “ Hi . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i clutch [my]0-i folder . “ Please take a seat . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron gestures to a chair and holds up [his]110-aaron finger . “ One minute , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron mouths . [I]0-i smile and nod as [I]0-i sit down . “ [I]110-aaron understand that , [Richard]144-richard . Yes , [I]110-aaron know . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron listens . “ [I]110-aaron do n’t care if [she]3465-she ’s hardworking . [She]3465-she broke protocol , and there are consequences . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i frown . What the hell ? Who ’s [he]110-aaron talking to ? “ [Richard]144-richard , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron snaps . “ [You]144-richard will fire [her]3465-she this afternoon , or [I]110-aaron will . And [we]3466-we both know who ’s going to make it less painful . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron rolls [his]110-aaron eyes . “ [Tristan]135-tristan is aware , yes , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron snaps . “ But as [the CEO]3206-the ceo [I]110-aaron have the control . [You]144-richard have two hours to escort [Lara Aspin]145-lara aspin from [the building]412-the building , or [I]110-aaron ’ll come down [myself]110-aaron . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron hangs up angrily . [I]0-i stare at [him]110-aaron , wide eyed . What did [she]781-she do ? [He]110-aaron bites [his]110-aaron bottom lip angrily as [his]110-aaron eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ [I]0-i ’ve got the story [you]110-aaron requested , ”[0-i] [I]0-i murmur . “ Good . ”[0-i] [He]110-aaron takes the folder from [me]0-i and rolls [his]110-aaron chair back as [he]110-aaron opens it and begins reading . [He]110-aaron ’s different today , angry . But maybe it ’s just that call [he]110-aaron came off from . [He]110-aaron inhales deeply and flicks the pages , clearly frustrated . “ Is it okay ? ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron raises [his]110-aaron eyebrows as if unimpressed . [I]0-i frown . “ A seismic weather event is hardly breaking news , is it ? ”[0-i] “ Well , what do [you]110-aaron want [me]0-i to write about ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . “ [I]0-i ca n’t name [a person]3469-a person or place or anything because it ’s fake news . [I]0-i do n’t want to get [us]3470-us sued . ”[0-i] “ [I]110-aaron am well aware of what it is , [Ms. Foster]146-ms. foster , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron snaps . “ What ’s wrong with [you]110-aaron today ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [He]110-aaron flicks the pages as [he]110-aaron reads . “ Nothing . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron reads on . “ This wo n’t do . [I]110-aaron ’ll write it [myself]110-aaron . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i frown . “ [I]0-i spent four hours on that last night . ”[0-i] [He]110-aaron looks up from the papers , and [I]0-i wither under [his]110-aaron glare . “ Well , what do [you]110-aaron want [me]0-i to write about , then ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Anything but fucking weather . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron closes the folder as if disgusted and places it on the table . [He]110-aaron pushes the intercom . “ [Tristan]135-tristan , come in here , please . ”[110-aaron] “ Yep . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i shrivel in [my]0-i chair a little . [God]88-god , [he]110-aaron ’s mean when [he]110-aaron ’s angry . [Tristan]135-tristan comes into [the office]444-the office , and [Jameson]126-jameson exhales heavily . “ [Ms. Foster]146-ms. foster has written [her]146-ms. foster story . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron gestures to the folder . “ Good . ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan smiles , and [he]135-tristan picks it up and begins to read . “ A seismic weather event wo n’t do , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson barks . [Tristan]135-tristan twists [his]135-tristan lips as [he]135-tristan reads on . “ It ’s very good , though , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron comments . Hmm , [I]0-i ’m totally crushing on [the wrong brother]783-the wrong brother . . . [[my]0-i one]784-my one is [an asshole]785-an asshole . “ Thank [you]110-aaron . ”[0-i] [I]0-i fake a smile . “ With all due respect , [Jameson]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i state , “ if [we]3471-we name this weather event and hype it up as coming in the next four months and that it ’s going to cause extensive damage , it will have legs . No names to trace , [people]267-people , or places . [I]0-i do n’t see how [I]0-i could have written a story about something else without jeopardizing [our]3471-we integrity . ”[0-i] “ [We]3471-we are not here to prove [our]3471-we integrity , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron growls . “ [We]3471-we are trying to withhold it . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i sit back in [my]0-i chair , annoyed . “ [I]0-i want a story on an FBI murder case . ”[0-i] [He]110-aaron narrows [his]110-aaron eyes as [he]110-aaron thinks . “ Make up a fake murder and name and a fake investigation and how close [they]3473-they are to closing it . ”[110-aaron] [My]0-i anger bubbles . “ If [you]110-aaron knew what [you]110-aaron wanted [me]0-i to write , why did n’t [you]110-aaron say that yesterday ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ [You]110-aaron told [me]0-i to do what [I]0-i wanted , and [I]0-i spent four hours writing that for [you]110-aaron . ”[0-i] [Tristan]135-tristan rolls [his]135-tristan lips to hide [his]135-tristan smirk . “ [I]135-tristan have things to do . Let [me]135-tristan know what story [we]3474-we ’re going with , ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan says as [he]135-tristan walks toward the door . “ Thanks , [Emily]91-emily . Great work . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan closes the door behind [him]135-tristan . [I]0-i glare at [the asshole in front of [me]0-i]786-the asshole in front of me . “ So what do [you]135-tristan want [me]0-i to do ? ”[0-i] [His]135-tristan cold eyes rise to meet [mine]0-i . “ [I]135-tristan told [you]91-emily what [I]135-tristan wanted [you]91-emily to do yesterday , but [you]135-tristan did n’t do that . . . did [you]135-tristan ? ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i frown . Wait , what ’s [he]135-tristan talking about now ? [I]0-i ’m confused . [He]135-tristan does n’t have to be so damn rude . [I]0-i snatch the folder from the table . “ All right , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ [I]0-i ’ll write a fake story about a fake murder of [a fake CEO]3475-a fake ceo by [a fake new employee]3476-a fake new employee . ”[0-i] [He]135-tristan glares at [me]0-i . “ With a fake ax . ”[135-tristan] “ Well . . . , ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan says with a sneer , “ just make sure [she]3476-a fake new employee has a fucking gray skirt on . ”[135-tristan] [My]0-i mouth falls open ; [he]135-tristan ’s pissed that [I]0-i did n’t do what [he]135-tristan asked . The nerve of [this jerk]787-this jerk . “ No , [she]3476-a fake new employee does n’t wear gray skirts on demand . [She]3476-a fake new employee ’s naked because [she]3476-a fake new employee ’s just had wild sex with [[her]3476-a fake new employee hot boyfriend]3477-her hot boyfriend right before [she]3476-a fake new employee chops off [that spoiled - brat CEO]3478-that spoiled - brat ceo ’s dick . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan narrows [his]135-tristan eyes in contempt . [I]0-i stand . “ [You]135-tristan will have [your]135-tristan story by five . [I]135-tristan ’ll email it over . ”[135-tristan] “ No , [you]135-tristan ’ll deliver it up here in person . ”[135-tristan] “ With all due respect , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say as [I]0-i smile sweetly , “ [I]0-i do n’t feel like seeing [you]135-tristan again today . [I]0-i ’ll deliver it to [Tristan]135-tristan . ”[0-i] “ Deliver it to [Tristan]135-tristan , and see what happens , ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan barks . [I]0-i turn and storm out of [the office]444-the office with red steam shooting out of [my]0-i ears . [The man]265-the man ’s [a fucking pig]790-a fucking pig . It ’s five thirty , and [I]0-i sit at [my]0-i desk as [I]0-i type the last word of [my]0-i fake story . [I]0-i hate to admit it , but this one is better . [[My]0-i coworkers]453-my coworkers have gone to [the bar]534-the bar , and [I]0-i ’m meeting [them]453-my coworkers [there]3073-there . [I]0-i ’m supposed to be taking it up to [[his]135-tristan office]496-his office , but [I]0-i ’m not . Screw [him]135-tristan . [I]0-i hit send to email it over , and [I]0-i turn off [my]0-i computer and pack up [my]0-i desk . [My]0-i phone rings , and the letter J lights up the screen . [I]0-i saved [his]135-tristan initial so [I]0-i ’d know if [he]135-tristan calls [me]0-i . [I]0-i pick up [my]0-i phone and hit decline , and then [I]0-i smile sweetly at the camera , knowing full well [he]135-tristan ’s watching [me]0-i . [I]0-i did not just break up with [one selfish asshole]795-one selfish asshole to go out with another . [He]135-tristan can kiss [my]0-i ass . A text comes through . Answer [your]796-your fucking phone . [I]0-i glare at the text and write back . [I]0-i have nothing to say to [you]796-your . [I]0-i ’ve finished work for the day . [You]796-your have [your]796-your story . Good luck with it . A reply bounces back . This is a personal call . [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes in disgust and reply . Find someone else in a gray skirt to suck [your]796-your dick on demand . [I]0-i ’m not interested in the position . [I]0-i put [my]0-i phone on silent and then into [my]0-i bag and continue to pack up [[my]0-i desk]587-my desk . [I]0-i take [the elevator]428-the elevator down to [the foyer]799-the foyer , and as [I]0-i walk through , [a security guard]800-a security guard is on the phone . “ Excuse [me]800-a security guard , [miss]3479-miss , ”[800-a security guard] [he]800-a security guard calls . “ Yes . ”[800-a security guard] “ [I]800-a security guard ’ve been instructed to tell [you]3479-miss to wait [here]275-here . ”[800-a security guard] Shit . [He]800-a security guard ’s on [his]800-a security guard way down . “ Um , no , [I]0-i ca n’t . [I]0-i ’m sorry . Apologize for [me]0-i , ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer as [I]0-i brush past [him]800-a security guard and out through the front doors . [I]0-i run around the corner , and then when [I]0-i ’m out of sight of [the security guard]284-the security guard , [I]0-i run across [the street]654-the street and duck into the café [I]0-i was in yesterday afternoon so [I]0-i can see . What does [he]800-a security guard want ? [I]0-i take a seat in the café by the window , and then [I]0-i see [Jameson]126-jameson come out the front doors in a rush and then look up and down [the street]654-the street . [He]126-jameson takes out [his]126-jameson phone and calls [someone]401-someone . [My]0-i phone starts to vibrate in [my]0-i bag . Shit . [I]0-i ’m going to totally screw up this opportunity and get [myself]0-i fired . Is that why [that other girl]805-that other girl got fired today ? Was [she]805-that other girl sleeping with [him]126-jameson , and things turned bad ? [I]0-i watch [him]126-jameson look up and down [the street]654-the street and dial the number again . [I]0-i let it ring . [He]126-jameson ’s openly furious . The front doors of [the building]412-the building open , and [Tristan]135-tristan comes out . [Jameson]126-jameson says something to [him]135-tristan , and [Tristan]135-tristan laughs . What did [he]126-jameson say ? [I]0-i watch with [my]0-i heart beating hard as [they]808-they both look up and down [the street]654-the street , and then [the limousine]759-the limousine pulls in . [He]126-jameson calls [me]0-i again , and [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes . Stop calling [me]0-i . [They]808-they finally get into [the limo]811-the limo , and [I]0-i watch as [it]811-the limo pulls away . [I]0-i drag [my]0-i hand down [my]0-i face in despair . [His]126-jameson temper and [my]0-i temper are a bad combination . [We]812-we are officially a bad idea . An hour later “ What do [you]126-jameson mean ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly frowns . “ [I]111-molly ’m confused . ”[111-molly] “ It ’s all just one big mess . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh . “ [I]0-i went [home]3076-home to [California]15-california , and it turns out that [Robbie]106-robbie did n’t actually give a crap , so [I]0-i ended it . But [I]0-i did n’t tell [Jameson]126-jameson that because [I]0-i do n’t want [him]126-jameson to think that it was because of [him]126-jameson . ”[0-i] “ Yeah , [I]111-molly get that . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly frowns . “ But why is [Jameson]126-jameson being such [an asshole]785-an asshole now ? ”[111-molly] “ Because [she]111-molly did n’t wear the gray skirt , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron interrupts . “ Do n’t [you]111-molly listen ? ”[110-aaron] “ But why ? ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly gasps . “ That ’s ridiculous . ”[111-molly] “ [I]0-i know , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ It ’s not about the skirt , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron replies as [he]110-aaron chews . “ It ’s a power thing . [He]126-jameson wants [her]111-molly to do as [he]126-jameson asks . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i listen . “ [You]111-molly think ? ”[110-aaron] “ [I]111-molly still do n’t get it . ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly frowns . “ It ’s symbolic to [him]126-jameson . [He]126-jameson wants [her]111-molly to submit . ”[111-molly] “ Well , [I]0-i ’m not , ”[0-i] [I]0-i huff . “ Honestly , [the man]265-the man is fucking stupid if [he]126-jameson thinks that [I]0-i will . ”[0-i] [Molly]111-molly rolls [her]111-molly eyes . “ Oh God , if [he]265-the man asked [me]111-molly to wear a skirt made of kidneys , [I]111-molly would , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly huffs as [she]111-molly stares into space . “ [I]110-aaron would even kill [fifty men]3484-fifty men to get the said kidneys . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron chuckles . “ Right ? [Me]110-aaron too . There is n’t actually anything that [he]265-the man could n’t ask [me]110-aaron to do . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron holds [his]110-aaron hands in the air . “ [I]110-aaron would do it all . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes , and [we]813-we all think for a moment . “ [You]110-aaron know what [I]111-molly would do if [I]111-molly were [you]110-aaron ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly says . “ What ? ”[111-molly] “ [I]111-molly would wear the gray skirt tomorrow , and [I]111-molly would ignore the fuck out of [him]110-aaron . ”[111-molly] [I]0-i stare at [her]111-molly . “ Make [the bastard]3485-the bastard weep . ”[111-molly] “ Yeah . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron smiles broadly . “ Flirt [your]111-molly ass off in that gray skirt . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i smirk as the idea rolls around in [my]0-i head . “ [You]660-my two friends know , [guys]3486-guys . . . that ’s not actually a bad idea . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i hold [my]0-i glass up in the air as [I]0-i smile at [[my]0-i two friends]660-my two friends . “ To [Operation Flirty Office Slut]3487-operation flirty office slut . ”[0-i] [Molly]111-molly smiles as [she]111-molly clinks [her]111-molly glass with [mine]0-i . [I]0-i smirk as [I]0-i stare at [her]111-molly . “ Game on . ”[0-i] [I]0-i march into [the office]444-the office like [a rock star]292-a rock star . No stockings . . . check . White lace bra . . . check . White silk shirt . . . check . High ponytail . . . check . Gray skirt with split . . . check , check , double check . “ Good morning . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile at [[my]0-i friends]651-my friends as [I]0-i arrive at [my]0-i desk . [Their]651-my friends eyes come to [me]0-i , and [they]651-my friends smirk as [they]651-my friends see [I]0-i ’m wearing the requested outfit . [Aaron]110-aaron gives [me]0-i a wink and turns back to [his]110-aaron computer . “ Does [anybody]532-anybody want coffee ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Yes , please , ”[651-my friends] [they]651-my friends both reply . [I]0-i walk into [the kitchen]818-the kitchen , and [Ricardo]132-ricardo follows [me]0-i in . “ Hey , [chickie]3489-chickie , [I]132-ricardo ’ve been waiting for [you]3489-chickie . ”[132-ricardo] [I]0-i smile an over - the - top fake smile . God . . . ca n’t [I]0-i have [someone better to fake flirt with]819-someone better to fake flirt with than [this guy]289-this guy ? “ Hi , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply excitedly . “ How are [you]132-ricardo ? ”[0-i] “ [I]132-ricardo ’m good . ”[132-ricardo] [He]132-ricardo smiles at [my]0-i enthusiasm . “ Listen , [I]132-ricardo ’m so sorry [I]132-ricardo got [you]3489-chickie into trouble the other day . ”[132-ricardo] [I]0-i smile and pull [my]0-i hand through [my]0-i ponytail . “ That ’s okay . Come and see [me]0-i later , though , wo n’t [you]3489-chickie ? ”[0-i] [His]132-ricardo eyes light up . “ Okay , it ’s a deal . ”[132-ricardo] [I]0-i walk back to [my]0-i desk and take a seat with [our]821-our three coffees , and [I]0-i open [my]0-i emails and get to work . [Jameson]126-jameson called [me]0-i six times last night , and [I]0-i do n’t know why . [I]0-i ’m not sure if [he]126-jameson wanted to apologize or fight . . . but [I]0-i ’m not giving [him]126-jameson the satisfaction of answering [his]126-jameson call so [he]126-jameson can do either . [I]0-i ’m going to have a good day , and [I]0-i ’m not going to think about [Jameson Miles]126-jameson once . [It]822-it ’s three o’clock , and [Operation Flirty Office Slut]147-operation flirty office slut is in full swing . [I]0-i ’ve smiled and laughed with [every loser in [the building]412-the building]823-every loser in the building today . [I]0-i ’m not sure if [he]126-jameson ’s even watching , but [I]0-i ’m about to up the ante . [I]0-i ’m on [my]0-i way up to see [Tristan]135-tristan about the story [I]0-i wrote . The elevator doors open , and [I]0-i smile sweetly at [the receptionist]742-the receptionist . “ Hello , [I]0-i ’m here to see [Tristan]135-tristan . ”[0-i] “ Sure , just a moment . ”[742-the receptionist] [She]742-the receptionist frowns as [she]742-the receptionist tries to remember [my]0-i name . “ It ’s [Emily Foster]91-emily . ”[742-the receptionist] “ That ’s right . [I]742-the receptionist ’m sorry . ”[742-the receptionist] [She]742-the receptionist calls through . “ [Tristan]135-tristan , [I]742-the receptionist have [Emily Foster]91-emily here to see [you]135-tristan . ”[742-the receptionist] “ Okay , send [her]91-emily in , ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan replies happily . “ Just go through to [the main conference room]3490-the main conference room , but instead of turning left to go to [[Jameson]126-jameson ’s office]3491-jameson ’s office , turn right , and go down [the corridor on the other side of [the building]412-the building]3492-the corridor on the other side of the building . ”[135-tristan] “ Thank [you]135-tristan . ”[742-the receptionist] [I]0-i follow [her]742-the receptionist directions and head down to the other end of [the building]412-the building . [I]0-i frown ; there are four office doors . [I]0-i hesitate . Which door did [she]742-the receptionist say ? [I]0-i walk down [the corridor]728-the corridor , and a door is open . [I]0-i see [Jameson]126-jameson is in [there]3073-there , talking to [a man]3093-a man . “ Sorry to bother [you]135-tristan . Is [[Tristan]135-tristan ’s office]3494-tristan ’s office down here ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . [Jameson]126-jameson ’s face falls as [he]126-jameson sees [me]0-i . “ Next door , ”[830-the other man] [the other man]830-the other man replies . [I]0-i smile sweetly . “ Thank [you]135-tristan . ”[0-i] [I]0-i head over and knock on [Tristan]135-tristan ’s door . “ Come in , ”[830-the other man] [he]830-the other man calls , and [I]0-i walk in and close the door behind [me]0-i . “ Hello . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ Hi , [Emily]91-emily . ”[0-i] [He]830-the other man smiles warmly as [he]830-the other man gestures to the chair in front of [his]830-the other man desk . “ Please take a seat . ”[830-the other man] As [I]0-i sit down , [I]0-i come to the realization that [Tristan]135-tristan does n’t make [me]0-i nervous at all ; [I]0-i wish [[his]135-tristan brother]736-his brother did n’t . “ [I]0-i just was wondering if [you]830-the other man had time to look at the story [I]0-i wrote ? ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i did , yes , and [I]0-i loved it . Were [you]830-the other man happy with it ? ”[0-i] “ Yeah , [I]830-the other man think it was better . [I]830-the other man was n’t sure what [you]830-the other man wanted [me]830-the other man to do with it next . ”[830-the other man] [He]830-the other man frowns . “ [We]3495-we ’ll need to submit it as if it has come to [you]830-the other man . Did [you]830-the other man talk to [Jameson]126-jameson ? ”[830-the other man] “ Umm . ”[830-the other man] [The office]444-the office door opens , and [Jameson]126-jameson marches in . “ Hello . ”[126-jameson] “ Speak of the devil . ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan smiles . “ Hello , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply as [I]0-i turn [my]0-i attention back to [Tristan]135-tristan . It ’s hard not to stare at [Jameson]126-jameson when [he]126-jameson ’s in [a room]833-a room ; [he]126-jameson overtakes any space . This playing hard to get is harder to do than it looks . “ [Emily]91-emily is here to talk about the story [she]91-emily wrote . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]135-tristan see . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan stares at [me]0-i , and [I]0-i feel the magnetic pull to [him]135-tristan as it begins to surround [me]0-i . “ Was it okay ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ It was . ”[0-i] [His]135-tristan eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ It was very good . ”[0-i] “ Are [we]834-the two men just going to submit it now as if it has come to [her]91-emily as news ? ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan asks . [Jameson]126-jameson ’s eyes stay fixed on [mine]0-i . “ Yes , [I]126-jameson think so . ”[126-jameson] [My]0-i eyes flick between [the two men]834-the two men . “ Okay . [I]0-i ’ll submit it and let [you]135-tristan know what happens . ”[0-i] [Jameson]126-jameson ’s eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ [I]126-jameson have something [I]126-jameson need [you]0-i to add with it . It ’s on [my]126-jameson computer . Come with [me]126-jameson , and [I]126-jameson ’ll get it now . ”[126-jameson] [My]0-i nerves tingle . “ Okay , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply as [I]0-i stand . [Jameson]126-jameson holds [his]126-jameson hand out . “ [Ladies]3496-ladies first . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i turn to [Tristan]135-tristan . “ Thank [you]135-tristan . See [you]135-tristan later . ”[0-i] [Tristan]135-tristan smiles broadly . “ Goodbye . Have a nice afternoon . ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i walk to [[Jameson]126-jameson ’s office]3491-jameson ’s office , and [I]0-i can feel the heat of [his]126-jameson stare on [my]0-i behind . Just play it cool . . . no flirting . . . no touching . Just play it cool . [I]0-i am here to prick tease [the bastard]3485-the bastard . . . nothing more and nothing less . [We]837-we get to [[his]126-jameson office]496-his office , and [he]126-jameson opens the door . [I]0-i walk past [him]126-jameson , and then [he]126-jameson closes it and flicks the lock . [I]0-i turn to [him]126-jameson as [he]126-jameson steps toward [me]0-i in slow motion . [His]126-jameson face comes to within an inch of [mine]0-i . [Our]837-we eyes search [each other]351-each other ’s , and without a word said , [he]126-jameson grabs [my]0-i ponytail and wraps it around [his]126-jameson hand and pulls [my]0-i head back to [his]126-jameson face . “ Do n’t fight with [me]126-jameson , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson breathes , then leans down and licks [my]0-i lips . “ Do n’t be [an asshole]785-an asshole , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [He]126-jameson bends and runs [his]126-jameson hand up [my]0-i bare leg as [he]126-jameson holds [my]0-i hair in [his]126-jameson hand . [His]126-jameson tongue licks up the length of [my]0-i neck , which is stretched out for [him]126-jameson , as [his]126-jameson hand grabs [my]0-i behind . “ Tell [me]126-jameson [he]126-jameson ’s gone , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers in [my]0-i ear as [he]126-jameson kisses it softly . Ah . . . this is not how the plan went in [my]0-i head . [I]0-i ’m supposed to be rejecting [him]126-jameson right about now . Abort mission . . . “ [He]126-jameson ’s gone , ”[0-i] [I]0-i breathe . [His]126-jameson lips take [mine]0-i , and [his]126-jameson tongue slides effortlessly through [my]0-i mouth as [my]0-i senses awaken . [His]126-jameson hand grinds [me]0-i onto [his]126-jameson waiting erection as [our]840-our kiss turns frantic . [He]126-jameson pushes [me]0-i up against the wall and tears [my]0-i skirt up and slips [his]126-jameson thick fingers underneath [my]0-i panties . [His]126-jameson dark eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ Tonight , [we]840-our fuck . ”[126-jameson] Chapter 7 “ [Jameson]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Will [you]126-jameson behave ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i pull [my]0-i skirt down over [my]0-i hips . [He]126-jameson smiles into [my]0-i neck and pulls [me]0-i closer ; [his]126-jameson lips brush against [mine]0-i as [he]126-jameson takes [my]0-i face in [his]126-jameson hands . The kiss is slow , long , and deliberate , and [I]0-i find [my]0-i feet floating in the air . “ Dinner ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson breathes . “ Hmm . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smile against [him]126-jameson as [he]126-jameson holds [my]0-i face . There ’s no mistaking that kiss . It ’s tempting , sensual , and a promise of sexual satisfaction . “ What time will [I]126-jameson pick [you]126-jameson up ? ”[126-jameson] “ That depends . ”[126-jameson] “ On what ? ”[126-jameson] “ On whether [you]126-jameson think [you]126-jameson can tell [me]126-jameson what to wear and what to do . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles softly , and [I]0-i feel [my]0-i heart skip a beat ; [he]126-jameson has n’t smiled at [me]0-i like that since the first night [we]841-we met . “ Forgive [me]126-jameson , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers as [he]126-jameson leans in and kisses [me]0-i again . “ [I]126-jameson simply wanted [you]0-i to wear [my]126-jameson favorite outfit so [I]126-jameson could admire [you]0-i in it . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson lips drop to [my]0-i neck as if [he]126-jameson ’s unable to stop [himself]126-jameson . “ [I]126-jameson did n’t mean to offend . ”[126-jameson] “ Do [you]126-jameson have to be so abrasive with [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [his]126-jameson teeth skim [my]0-i jawline . “ Abrasive is who [I]0-i am . ”[0-i] “ [The man [I]126-jameson met]3498-the man i met was funny and carefree . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles down at [me]0-i as [he]126-jameson brushes the hair back from [my]0-i forehead . “ [[Our]842-our meeting]3499-our meeting was a luxury that [I]126-jameson ’ve never been afforded . ”[126-jameson] “ How so ? ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson had the gift of anonymity . ”[126-jameson] [Our]842-our lips touch , and [I]0-i rub [my]0-i fingers through [his]126-jameson stubble . “ Why are [you]126-jameson so different here ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [He]126-jameson pulls out of [my]0-i grip and walks over to [his]126-jameson desk . “ [I]126-jameson am who [I]126-jameson have to be , [Emily]91-emily . Funny and carefree ca n’t successfully run [an empire]3500-an empire . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson as [I]0-i think for a moment . “ Okay , then [I]0-i guess [I]0-i ’ll have to decline dinner . ”[0-i] “ Why is that ? ”[126-jameson] “ Because [I]126-jameson want to spend a night with [Jim]90-jim . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ [Jameson Miles]126-jameson [the CEO]3206-the ceo does n’t interest [me]126-jameson . [I]126-jameson could n’t care less about [your]0-i money or [your]0-i power . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson stares at [me]0-i for an extended time as if processing [my]0-i words . [I]0-i walk over and kiss [him]126-jameson softly . “ Tell [Jim]90-jim to pick [me]0-i up at seven , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i run [my]0-i tongue through [his]126-jameson lips . “ [I]0-i ’m aching for [him]90-jim . ”[0-i] Tenderness crosses [his]126-jameson face . “ [I]0-i ’ll see what [I]0-i can do . ”[0-i] [I]0-i walk back down to [my]0-i floor and take a seat at [my]0-i desk . “ How did it go ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron whispers as [he]110-aaron types . “ Did [you]0-i make [him]90-jim beg ? ”[110-aaron] “ God , [I]0-i ’m totally crap at playing hard to get . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh . [Molly]111-molly smirks . “ Are n’t [we]3502-we all ? ”[111-molly] [I]0-i open [my]0-i computer . “ Well ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron whispers as [he]110-aaron stops working . “ Tell [us]3502-we . ”[110-aaron] “ [We]3502-we ’re having dinner tonight , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply as [I]0-i try to sound casual . “ Oh [my]111-molly God , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly whispers in excitement . “ What the hell are [you]110-aaron wearing ? ”[111-molly] “ [I]0-i do n’t know . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ Something insanely hot . ”[0-i] [I]0-i hold [my]0-i hand over [my]0-i heart as [I]0-i try to will it to slow down , and [I]0-i glance at the clock on the wall—6:55 p.m. [He]110-aaron ’ll be [here]275-here any minute . [I]0-i shake [my]0-i hands around and pace back and forth . “ Just be cool . . . do n’t sleep with [him]110-aaron . Whatever [you]110-aaron do , do n’t be easy , ”[0-i] [I]0-i remind [myself]0-i out loud . [I]0-i walk back to the mirror in [the bathroom]328-the bathroom and reapply [my]0-i lipstick . “ Get to know [each other]351-each other , and then make an informed decision based on [his]110-aaron personality and not how much [he]110-aaron turns [you]110-aaron on . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk at [the ridiculous girl talking to [her]845-the ridiculous girl talking to her reflection reflection]845-the ridiculous girl talking to her reflection . If [his]110-aaron dick was n’t so perfect , [I]0-i would n’t be thinking about it at all , then . . . would [I]0-i ? [My]0-i phone buzzes . “ Hello , ”[0-i] [I]0-i answer as [my]0-i heart races . “ [I]110-aaron ’m [downstairs]3304-downstairs , ”[110-aaron] [his]110-aaron deep , velvety voice purrs . “ What number are [you]0-i ? ”[110-aaron] “ [I]110-aaron ’ll come down now . See [you]0-i soon . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i walk back to the full - length mirror and take one last look . [I]0-i ’m wearing a black fitted dress that hangs to just below [my]0-i knees . It has spaghetti straps and a low back . It goes with [my]0-i black stilettos and matching clutch . [My]0-i long dark hair is set in big Hollywood curls and pinned back on one side . [I]0-i ’ve gone all out with [my]0-i makeup and have smoky gray eyes and glossy red lips . And of course , [I]0-i ’m waxed to within an inch of [my]0-i life . . . just in case . [I]0-i take [the elevator]428-the elevator , and when [I]0-i walk out through [the foyer]799-the foyer , [I]0-i see [him]110-aaron through the glass front doors of [[my]0-i building]848-my building . [He]110-aaron ’s wearing a navy sports coat and blue jeans with a white T - shirt . [He]110-aaron looks like [he]110-aaron ’s stepped straight out of a magazine . [My]0-i breath catches at the sight of [him]110-aaron , and [I]0-i smile as [he]110-aaron turns toward [me]0-i . “ Hi . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron smiles . “ Hi . ”[110-aaron] [His]110-aaron eyes roam down the length of [my]0-i body as [he]110-aaron takes [my]0-i hand in [his]110-aaron . “ [You]0-i look beautiful . ”[110-aaron] “ Thank [you]110-aaron . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile bashfully . [We]849-we stare at [each other]351-each other . . . and it ’s there again . The electric current that runs between [us]849-we whenever [we]849-we ’re alone . “ What do [you]0-i want to do ? ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron asks as [his]110-aaron eyes drop to [my]0-i lips . [I]0-i smile . [Jim]90-jim ’s here — [Jameson]126-jameson would n’t ask [me]0-i what [I]0-i wanted to do . “ Did n’t [you]0-i mention Italian ? ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron leans in and kisses [me]0-i , with just the right amount of suction to raise [my]0-i feet from the floor . [My]0-i arms go around [his]110-aaron neck , and [we]849-we stand in [the street]654-the street and stare at [each other]351-each other . “ [You]0-i really do turn [me]110-aaron on , [Emily Foster]91-emily , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron breathes . [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i pull [my]0-i fingers through [his]110-aaron dark hair . “ Did [you]110-aaron come all the way across [town]3306-town to make out with [me]0-i on [the street]654-the street ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask innocently . “ No . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron smirks . “ But now that [I]110-aaron ’m [here]275-here , it ’s the only thing [I]110-aaron want to do . ”[110-aaron] [We]849-we kiss again , and it ’s slow and tender , and [I]0-i feel [my]0-i arousal fly in like a 747 . [His]110-aaron hard length makes an appearance up against [my]0-i stomach , and [I]0-i smile broadly . “ What ? ”[0-i] “ Is [he]110-aaron coming to dinner ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . [He]110-aaron chuckles . “ Well , [he]110-aaron does seem to want to hang around whenever [you]0-i are near . ”[110-aaron] “ Hanging is n’t a word that [I]110-aaron would use to describe that thing . ”[110-aaron] [His]110-aaron eyes sparkle with a certain something , and [he]110-aaron takes [my]0-i hand in [his]110-aaron . “ Let ’s go this way . ”[110-aaron] “ [We]853-we ’re walking ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask in surprise . “ [I]0-i got dropped off . [They]3508-they ’ll pick [us]853-we up later . [We]853-we ’ll catch [a cab]3509-a cab from here to [the restaurant]3510-the restaurant . ”[0-i] “ Okay . ”[853-we] [We]853-we walk around the corner , and [he]110-aaron hails [a cab]3509-a cab , and [we]853-we climb into the back of [it]3509-a cab . “ [Waverly Place]25-waverly place , please . ”[110-aaron] “ Okay . ”[635-the driver] [The driver]635-the driver pulls out into the traffic . “ How long have [you]110-aaron lived in [New York]3-new york ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [My]0-i whole life . ”[0-i] “ [[Your]110-aaron parents]3511-your parents live [here]275-here ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . [I]0-i ca n’t imagine growing up in [a city like this]856-a city like this . “ Yes , although [I]0-i went to school elsewhere . ”[0-i] “ Where did [you]110-aaron go to [school]419-school ? ”[0-i] “ Many places — finished in [Aspen]26-aspen . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stare at [him]635-the driver . What the hell ? “ [You]110-aaron went to school alone in [Aspen]26-aspen ? ”[635-the driver] “ No , [I]0-i always had [[my]0-i brothers]3514-my brothers with [me]0-i . ”[0-i] [He]635-the driver picks [my]0-i hand up and kisses the back of it with a soft smile . [I]0-i stare at [him]635-the driver . [We]857-we come from completely different worlds . [I]0-i ca n’t even fathom [his]635-the driver upbringing . “ What ’s that look ? ”[635-the driver] [he]635-the driver asks . “ [I]635-the driver was n’t even allowed to have a sleepover at [[[my]635-the driver friend]3515-my friend ’s place]3516-my friend ’s place . ”[635-the driver] “ Independence has always been encouraged in [[my]0-i family]3517-my family . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i think of something . “ What ? ”[0-i] “ If [you]635-the driver ’ve been living on [your]635-the driver own since [you]635-the driver were . . . ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause as [I]0-i wait for [his]635-the driver answer . “ Twelve . ”[0-i] “ [You]635-the driver should have the emotional intelligence of [a ninety - year - old]3518-a ninety - year - old . Is that right ? ”[635-the driver] [He]635-the driver throws [his]635-the driver head back and laughs out loud . “ Should being the operative word . ”[635-the driver] [His]635-the driver eyes dance with delight . “ And what would [your]635-the driver emotional intelligence be at ? ”[635-the driver] “ Hmm . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i think . “ Emotionally [I]0-i think [I]0-i would be about age thirty . ”[0-i] “ Physically ? ”[635-the driver] [He]635-the driver smirks . “ Oh God , eighteen . ”[635-the driver] [I]0-i laugh . “ [I]0-i ’m not very experienced at all . ”[0-i] [His]635-the driver eyes hold [mine]0-i , and [I]0-i feel the burn from [his]635-the driver gaze . “ What would [your]635-the driver physical experience be at ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [I]0-i ’m more of a show than [tell kind of person]3519-tell kind of person . ”[0-i] [He]635-the driver gives [me]0-i a slow , sexy smile . “ Happy to give [you]0-i a demonstration , though . ”[0-i] [I]0-i giggle as [the cab]858-the cab pulls to a stop . “ [I]0-i bet [you]635-the driver are . ”[0-i] [We]859-we climb out of [the cab]858-the cab , and two minutes later [Jameson]126-jameson pulls [me]0-i by the hand into [a restaurant named [Babbo]27-babbo]861-a restaurant named babbo . [It]861-a restaurant named babbo kind of looks like [a mini English pub]862-a mini english pub from the outside , all quaint and cute , but when [we]859-we walk through the door , [it]861-a restaurant named babbo ’s a lot bigger than [it]861-a restaurant named babbo seems . [The space]863-the space is dark and moody , and gold light fixtures add to the ambience . Fresh flowers are in giant vases everywhere , and it feels super romantic . “ Hello , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles . ”[864-the man at the desk] [The man at the desk]864-the man at the desk smiles . “ [Your]114-mr. miles table is this way , [sir]3064-sir . ”[864-the man at the desk] [Jameson]126-jameson takes [my]0-i hand and leads [me]0-i through to [the corner of [the restaurant]3510-the restaurant]865-the corner of the restaurant ; [the waiter]867-the waiter pulls out [my]0-i chair . “ Thank [you]126-jameson . ”[867-the waiter] “ Would [you]126-jameson like something to drink to start ? ”[867-the waiter] “ Yes . ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson peruses the wine menu . “ Red ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks [me]0-i . “ Whatever . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i shrug with a nervous smile . “ [We]869-us ’ll have a bottle of [Henschke]148-grace . ”[0-i] “ Yes , [sir]3064-sir ; which one ? ”[867-the waiter] “ [Hill of Roses]28-hill of roses , please , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson replies as [he]126-jameson closes the menu . [The waiter]867-the waiter disappears , leaving [us]869-us alone . “ [I]0-i ’m guessing that [you]126-jameson know [your]126-jameson wine ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . [He]126-jameson pours [us]869-us both a glass of water . “ [I]126-jameson only go to restaurants that stock the wine [I]126-jameson like . So yes , [I]126-jameson suppose [I]126-jameson know wine . ”[126-jameson] “ Ah . [I]0-i see . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk . “ One of those . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles . “ Perhaps . ”[126-jameson] [Our]869-us eyes linger on [each other]351-each other ’s faces for a moment . “ [I]126-jameson ca n’t believe [you]0-i ’re [the frigging CEO]3522-the frigging ceo . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson chuckles and rests [his]126-jameson face on [his]126-jameson hand . “ [I]126-jameson thought [you]0-i wanted a date with [Jim]90-jim tonight ? ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson did . . . [I]126-jameson mean , [I]126-jameson do . ”[126-jameson] “ Well , why are [we]873-we talking about [CEOs]3309-ceos ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile softly . “ [I]0-i do n’t know . ”[0-i] [The waiter]867-the waiter returns and opens the bottle of wine and pours a little in a glass . [Jameson]126-jameson tastes it . “ That ’s fine . ”[867-the waiter] [The waiter]867-the waiter fills [our]873-we glasses and disappears . [Jameson]126-jameson holds [his]126-jameson glass up , and [I]0-i softly clink it with [mine]0-i and take a sip and taste the rich , velvety flavor . “ Hmm . ”[0-i] [I]0-i nod . “ [I]0-i ’m impressed . ”[0-i] “ [I]126-jameson have excellent taste . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles before falling serious again . “ In all things . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smile bashfully ; [he]126-jameson ’s talking about [me]0-i . “ Tell [me]126-jameson about last weekend , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks . “ Not much to tell . ”[126-jameson] “ [You]0-i broke up with [him]126-jameson ? ”[0-i] “ It was a long time coming . ”[126-jameson] “ [You]0-i were n’t happy ? ”[126-jameson] “ No . Not for a long time . ”[0-i] “ What ’s [his]126-jameson name ? What does [he]126-jameson do ? ”[126-jameson] “ [I]0-i ’m not telling [you]126-jameson [his]126-jameson name , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ [He]126-jameson ’s [a businessman]3524-a businessman — successful and handsome , ”[0-i] [I]0-i lie . [He]126-jameson sips [his]126-jameson wine as [he]126-jameson watches [me]0-i , and [I]0-i know [he]126-jameson has something else on [his]126-jameson mind . “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Did [you]126-jameson ever think about [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] “ Yes . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile softly . “ Did [you]126-jameson ever think about [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] “ [I]126-jameson did , actually . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ What did [you]126-jameson think about ? ”[126-jameson] A slow , sexy smile crosses [his]126-jameson face . “ What ? ”[126-jameson] “ [You]126-jameson do n’t want to know . ”[0-i] “ No , [I]0-i do . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ Tell [me]0-i . ”[0-i] “ [I]126-jameson was thinking that [you]0-i were probably the hottest sex [I]126-jameson ’d ever had . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson eyes drop to [my]0-i lips . The air crackles between [us]874-we . “ And even now , every time [I]874-we ’m in [a room]833-a room with [you]0-i , it ’s as if [my]874-we body takes on a need of its own . ”[874-we] Time stops as [we]874-we stare at [each other]351-each other . [He]126-jameson sips [his]126-jameson wine in slow motion . “ When [I]126-jameson look at [you]0-i . . . [I]126-jameson have one thing on [my]126-jameson mind , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson murmurs . “ [I]149-primal ca n’t help it . It ’s almost primal . ”[149-primal] [Primal]149-primal . “ It ’s getting damn hard to control , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers darkly . Damn , [this man]327-this man is something else , but every warning signal is telling [me]0-i to run away as fast as [I]0-i can . If [he]327-this man can affect [me]0-i the way [he]327-this man did after one night . . . what could two nights do ? [Our]874-we eyes are locked , and arousal heats [my]0-i blood . Suddenly [I]0-i do n’t want to play hard to get ; [I]0-i do n’t care if [we]874-we do n’t know [each other]351-each other . [I]0-i do n’t care about the risks . [He]327-this man has something that [I]0-i need . . . and damn it , [I]0-i ’m taking it without questions . “ [We]874-we should order , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [He]126-jameson opens the menu with a sense of urgency . “ What do [you]0-i want ? ”[126-jameson] “ Whatever ’s the quickest . ”[126-jameson] An hour later , [he]126-jameson pulls [me]0-i up [the sidewalk]878-the sidewalk by the hand . “ [[My]126-jameson car]3526-my car is parked around here . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson turns and takes [me]0-i into [his]126-jameson arms and aggressively kisses [me]0-i , and [I]0-i smile against [his]126-jameson lips . The way [we]879-we laughed and talked over dinner tonight reminded [me]0-i of the Jim [I]0-i remember , [the man on [the plane]291-the plane who was interested in everything about [me]0-i and [my]0-i life]880-the man on the plane who was interested in everything about me and my life . As if [he]126-jameson felt it , too , [we]879-we nearly made out in the middle of [a crowded restaurant]882-a crowded restaurant . [He]126-jameson ’s not wrong ; this attraction is insane . “ Hurry , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper against [his]126-jameson lips . It ’s one thing to go out to dinner with [a gorgeous man]883-a gorgeous man — it ’s another to imagine [yourself]884-yourself under the table , sucking [his]126-jameson dick the entire time . [I]0-i do n’t know if it ’s that [he]126-jameson told [me]0-i that [I]0-i was the best sex [he]126-jameson ’s ever had , but . . . damn it , [I]0-i want to blow [his]126-jameson frigging mind . [I]0-i ’m desperate to get [him]126-jameson naked . [I]0-i want to be [that girl [he]126-jameson turned [me]0-i into in [Boston]11-boston]885-that girl he turned me into in boston again . [I]0-i ’ve missed [her]885-that girl he turned me into in boston . [We]886-we turn the corner , and [I]0-i see [the big black limousine parked by the curb]887-the big black limousine parked by the curb . [I]0-i stop still . “ What ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson frowns . “ [The limo]811-the limo is [here]275-here ? ”[126-jameson] “ Yes . So ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson for an extended moment . [He]126-jameson rolls [his]126-jameson eyes and opens the back door . “ Get in . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i climb in , and within two seconds , [he]126-jameson ’s in [the car]422-the car and has [me]0-i straddled over [his]126-jameson lap with [my]0-i dress up around [my]0-i waist . The security screen is up , providing [us]886-we with privacy . [His]126-jameson cock is hard , and [he]126-jameson grabs [my]0-i hip bones and guides [my]0-i sex back and forth over [him]126-jameson as [we]886-we kiss . [His]126-jameson hands are on [my]0-i behind and then trailing up and down [my]0-i back as [my]0-i body takes on a rhythm of its own . [His]126-jameson eyes are dark , and [his]126-jameson fingers dip into [my]0-i panties , and [he]126-jameson slides them through [my]0-i flesh . “ Fuck , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . “ [I]126-jameson could blow just by feeling [this beautiful , hot pussy]3529-this beautiful , hot pussy . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i begin to rock down on [him]126-jameson with force , searching for a deeper connection , and [his]126-jameson jaw hangs slack as [he]126-jameson stares up at [me]0-i . [I]0-i do n’t know what the hell kind of nympho pills [someone]401-someone slipped into [my]0-i drink at dinner , but [I]0-i find [myself]0-i on the floor between [his]126-jameson legs , and [I]0-i unzip [his]126-jameson jeans with force . [He]126-jameson hisses as [I]0-i push [him]126-jameson back into [his]126-jameson seat and spread [his]126-jameson legs aggressively . [Our]890-our eyes lock , and [I]0-i lick the end of [him]126-jameson and taste the preejaculate as it oozes from [his]126-jameson head . [He]126-jameson cups [my]0-i face , and [I]0-i take [him]126-jameson deep down [my]0-i throat as [he]126-jameson clenches . “ Fuck , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson growls in a whisper as [his]126-jameson stomach contracts . “ Fucking hell , [Emily]91-emily . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i begin to fist [him]126-jameson hard , and [he]126-jameson lurches underneath [me]0-i . [He]126-jameson ’s going to come . [I]0-i want [him]126-jameson to come hard , quick . . . and unbridled . [I]0-i need to own [him]126-jameson tonight . Pleasing [him]126-jameson makes [me]0-i feel good about [myself]0-i , and [this new version of [Emily]91-emily]891-this new version of emily is someone [I]0-i like . [I]0-i want to keep [her]91-emily . “ [Emily]91-emily , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson growls as [he]126-jameson grabs a handful of [my]0-i hair . “ [We]893-we ’re [home]3076-home . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson pushes the lock down on the door just before [[his]126-jameson driver]892-his driver tries to open it . [I]0-i scramble to the seat , and [he]126-jameson zips [his]126-jameson jeans up as [we]893-we both pant , gasping for air . What the hell ? [This man]327-this man makes [me]0-i an animal . [He]126-jameson turns to [me]0-i and smirks as [he]126-jameson fixes [my]0-i hair . “ Let ’s just get to [the apartment]3531-the apartment , shall [we]893-we ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson kisses [me]0-i tenderly ; [his]126-jameson lips linger over [mine]0-i as [we]893-we stare at [each other]351-each other . “ It ’s good to see [you]0-i again , [Emily Foster]91-emily , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . [I]0-i lick [my]0-i lips as [I]0-i climb back over to straddle [him]126-jameson . “ It ’s good to taste [you]126-jameson again , [Jameson Miles]126-jameson . ”[0-i] [I]0-i rock [my]0-i sex over [him]126-jameson , and [he]126-jameson grabs [my]0-i hip bones and holds [me]0-i still . “ Stop , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson commands . “ Stop now . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i put [my]0-i lips up to [his]126-jameson ear . “ [I]0-i want [you]126-jameson to blow [your]126-jameson load in [[your]126-jameson car]3532-your car , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper before biting [him]126-jameson . “ Fuck [me]0-i right here . ”[0-i] “ [Jesus Christ]150-jesus . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson pushes [me]0-i off and opens the door in one swift movement , and [the driver]635-the driver drops [his]635-the driver head as [he]635-the driver pretends not to know what [we]897-we were doing in [there]3073-there . “ Thank [you]0-i , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson says as [he]126-jameson pulls [me]0-i out and marches into [the building]412-the building . [We]897-we get into [the elevator]428-the elevator , and [the attendant]301-the attendant stares straight ahead . [I]0-i ’m panting , dripping wet , and [my]0-i sex is throbbing . [I]0-i ’m a hot mess . [Jameson]126-jameson ’s eyes are dark as [he]126-jameson stares straight ahead at the closed doors . God , [I]0-i need [him]126-jameson . The doors open , and [he]126-jameson pulls [me]0-i out by the hand . [Our]897-we lips are locked , and [he]126-jameson walks [me]0-i into [[his]126-jameson apartment]3362-his apartment backward . “ Is n’t this how [we]897-we got into [the room]613-the room last time ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile as [he]126-jameson lifts [me]0-i . “ Similar . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson puts [me]0-i down , and [I]0-i look around , and [my]0-i heart drops . “ What the hell , [Jim]90-jim ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper through shock . “ What ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson frowns . “ This is [[your]126-jameson house]3402-your house ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask as [my]0-i eyes scan [the room]613-the room . [His]126-jameson lips drop to [my]0-i neck as [he]126-jameson licks and sucks down [my]0-i collarbone ; [he]126-jameson ’s completely preoccupied . [The apartment]3531-the apartment is huge and modern , with floor - to - ceiling windows and the lights of [New York]3-new york twinkling everywhere [I]0-i look . Lamps are strategically placed to give a warm feeling . [I]0-i ’ve never been anywhere so beautiful . . . or foreign . The floors are a light timber parquetry , and luxurious velvet and leather furnishings fill [the space]863-the space . [The living room]906-the living room has a fireplace with a huge gilded mirror hanging over it and a beautiful antique rug . “ Stop looking at [the apartment]3531-the apartment , and look at [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson grabs [my]0-i face and drags it back to [his]126-jameson . [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson . “ What ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson murmurs . “ [This apartment]3536-this apartment . ”[126-jameson] “ What about it ? ”[126-jameson] “ [You]126-jameson come from [a different world than [me]0-i]3537-a different world than me , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Who cares ? ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ [I]126-jameson want [you]0-i , and [you]0-i want [me]126-jameson . What else is there ? ”[126-jameson] [Our]907-our kiss turns desperate as [he]126-jameson slams [me]0-i up against the wall and tears [my]0-i dress from [my]0-i body in one quick movement . [I]0-i push [his]126-jameson jacket over [his]126-jameson shoulders and grab [his]126-jameson T - shirt and lift it off and then unzip [his]126-jameson jeans , and [he]126-jameson kicks them to the side . [We]907-our stare at [each other]351-each other , both in [our]907-our underwear , both panting , both craving a deeper connection . It ’s like Christmas morning . . . only better . Next thing [I]0-i know , [I]0-i ’m being dragged through [[his]126-jameson apartment]3362-his apartment and thrown onto the bed . [He]126-jameson tears [my]0-i underwear from [my]0-i body . [His]126-jameson hungry gaze drops down the length of [my]0-i body as [he]126-jameson drinks [me]0-i in . And there it is — the heat that [this man]327-this man creates with [his]126-jameson stare could light up the earth . The way [he]126-jameson looks at [me]0-i is something [I]0-i ’ve never forgotten . [He]126-jameson lifts [my]0-i legs and puts them around [his]126-jameson waist and then begins to slide [his]126-jameson thick cock through [my]0-i swollen flesh . A sexy smile crosses [his]126-jameson face as [he]126-jameson looks down at [me]0-i . “ [I]126-jameson remember now . ”[126-jameson] “ [You]126-jameson remember what ? ”[126-jameson] “ What the F stands for in [your]0-i initials . ”[126-jameson] “ What ’s that ? ”[126-jameson] “ Fuck bunny . ”[0-i] [I]0-i burst out laughing . “ [I]0-i ’d forgotten about that . ”[0-i] “ How could [you]126-jameson forget anything ? Every detail from that night is burned into [my]126-jameson brain . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson hands [me]0-i a condom . “ Put it on [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [My]0-i lips softly kiss [his]126-jameson dick before [I]0-i follow [his]126-jameson instruction . So bossy . “ Like what ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper up at [him]126-jameson . [I]0-i lie down , and [he]126-jameson crawls back over [me]0-i . “ Like the way [you]0-i looked at [me]126-jameson , the way [you]0-i tasted under [my]126-jameson tongue . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson lips take [mine]0-i , and [our]911-our kiss deepens . “ [I]126-jameson remember how every muscle deep inside [you]0-i felt when [your]0-i body rippled around [mine]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smile up at [him]126-jameson in wonder as [I]0-i run [my]0-i fingers through [his]126-jameson stubble . Please do n’t be any more gorgeous . [I]0-i wo n’t be able to deal with [you]912-you at all . “ But it was the way [you]0-i kissed [me]0-i that [I]0-i remember the most . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes search [his]126-jameson . “ How did [I]0-i kiss [you]0-i ? ”[0-i] “ Like [you]0-i ’d been waiting [your]0-i whole life to kiss [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson slides in deep , and [my]0-i heart constricts . [I]0-i bring [my]0-i legs higher . “ Maybe [I]0-i had . ”[0-i] [We]913-we stare at [each other]351-each other , [his]126-jameson body inside [mine]0-i , and even though [I]0-i know that this is just sex and that it means nothing , it feels intimate and special . . . more than it should . Stop it . Stop overthinking this . “ Are [you]126-jameson going to keep jabbering on , or are [you]126-jameson going to fuck [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i tease to lighten the moment . [He]126-jameson chuckles and pulls out and slams into [me]0-i , knocking the air from [my]0-i lungs . [I]0-i cry out . Oh . . . dear God . [I]0-i think [I]0-i just woke [the devil]3420-the devil . [He]126-jameson pumps [me]0-i with [his]126-jameson knees spread wide , harder and harder , and with every slam [he]126-jameson lifts [my]0-i legs a little higher and a little wider . [He]126-jameson holds [himself]126-jameson still and then circles deep inside [me]0-i . [My]0-i head tips back to the sky as [I]0-i lose all coherent thought . “ Oh God , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whimper as [his]126-jameson teeth graze [my]0-i neck . “ That ’s so good . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson keeps doing the delicious movement as [his]126-jameson thumb circles over [my]0-i clitoris . [My]0-i body begins to shudder , and [he]126-jameson grabs [my]0-i face and brings it to [his]126-jameson . [Our]916-our eyes lock as [my]0-i body arches and writhes beneath [him]126-jameson . “ Look at [me]126-jameson while [you]0-i come on [my]126-jameson cock , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson commands as [he]126-jameson straightens [his]126-jameson arms and puts [my]0-i legs over [his]126-jameson shoulders . The change in position deepens [him]126-jameson inside of [me]0-i , and [I]0-i convulse as [he]126-jameson slams into [me]0-i . [His]126-jameson body begins to take [mine]0-i at piston pace , and [I]0-i grip [his]126-jameson arms as [I]0-i stare up at [him]126-jameson . “ Fuck yeah , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson growls . “ Fuck . . . fuck . . . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson tips [his]126-jameson head back and cries out as [I]0-i feel the telling jerk as [he]126-jameson comes deep inside [me]0-i . [We]917-we ’re wet with perspiration , and [he]126-jameson bends and tenderly takes [my]0-i lips with [his]126-jameson . [My]0-i heart races out of control as [I]0-i stare at the ceiling , gasping for air . [His]126-jameson head is in [my]0-i neck , [his]126-jameson lips trailing along [my]0-i collarbone . What the fuck was that ? That was n’t sex — that was an apocalyptic event . [I]0-i ’m ruined . [I]0-i wake in the darkness ; the glow of the [New York]3-new york city lights illuminates through [the room]613-the room . It ’s late — or early . About four in the morning , [I]0-i think . [We]917-we did n’t shut the drapes before going to sleep . What a night . [We]917-we devoured [each other]351-each other until [we]917-we had nothing left . [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson as [he]126-jameson lies flat on [his]126-jameson back in an exhausted sleep . [I]0-i do n’t know what [we]917-we are to [each other]351-each other , but [I]0-i do know that [he]126-jameson ’s [[my]0-i sexual soul mate]921-my sexual soul mate . Is that even a thing ? [Our]917-we bodies are like animals with [each other]351-each other ; neither of [us]917-we could get enough . The thirst just could n’t be quenched . If [he]126-jameson were to wake up now , [I]0-i would be instantly aroused , as [I]0-i know [he]126-jameson would be . [He]126-jameson ’s right , this is primal . [I]0-i ’m thirsty , so [I]0-i climb out of bed and throw on [his]126-jameson robe and make [my]0-i way out to [the kitchen]818-the kitchen in search of water . [We]917-we left the lamps on , so [the rooms]924-the rooms are partially lit . [I]0-i do n’t even remember getting to [the bedroom]925-the bedroom . [I]0-i find a glass and pour [myself]0-i some water from the fridge , and as [I]0-i look around , [my]0-i heart drops . What the hell kind of [kitchen]926-kitchen is this ? It ’s like [a restaurant]927-a restaurant . [I]0-i walk back out to [the living room]906-the living room and stare out over [the city]3381-the city way down below . [My]0-i eyes roam over [the apartment]3531-the apartment , and [my]0-i heart flutters . This is real money . Stupid money . [[My]0-i entire apartment]931-my entire apartment would fit into [[his]932-his bedroom]933-his bedroom alone . What does [a place like this]934-a place like this cost ? [Our]935-our clothes are strewn all over the floor , and [I]0-i pick them up and fold them and put them onto the coffee table . [I]0-i see something light up on the floor . [I]0-i frown and bend to pick up [Jameson]126-jameson ’s phone . It must have fallen out of [his]126-jameson pocket as [we]935-our were undressing . The screen lights up as a message comes through , and the name [Chloe]151-chloe flashes on the screen . Where are [you]126-jameson ? Did [your]126-jameson meeting go late ? [I]0-i stare at the phone . What the fuck ? Who ’s [Chloe]151-chloe ? [Jameson]126-jameson [I]0-i wake to the sound of [my]0-i alarm , and [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i stretch ; [I]0-i ’m sated and sleepy . Relaxed for the first time in a long time . What a night . . . what [a woman]381-a woman . [I]0-i reach for [Emily]91-emily and frown when [I]0-i realize [she]91-emily ’s not in bed with [me]0-i . [She]91-emily must be in [the bathroom]328-the bathroom . [I]0-i doze for another twenty minutes , and eventually when [she]91-emily does n’t return , [I]0-i get up . “ [Emily]91-emily ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i call as [I]0-i walk into [the bathroom]328-the bathroom . [It]328-the bathroom ’s empty . [I]0-i walk out into [the living area]939-the living area . “ [Emily]91-emily ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i call . Silence . “ Where is [she]91-emily ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i look around to see [my]0-i clothes folded on the coffee table and notice that [hers]91-emily . . . are gone . “ [Emily]91-emily ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i call as [I]0-i do a 360 of [[my]0-i apartment]940-my apartment . “ [Emily]91-emily ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i clench [my]0-i jaw as [my]0-i anger begins to escalate . [I]0-i dial [her]91-emily number as a shade of red clouds [my]0-i vision . [I]0-i hear [my]0-i furious heartbeat in [my]0-i ears as adrenaline fills [my]0-i bloodstream . “ Hello , ”[91-emily] [she]91-emily answers . “ Where the fuck are [you]91-emily ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i sneer . Chapter 8 [Jameson]126-jameson “ [I]91-emily had to go , ”[91-emily] [she]91-emily stammers . “ Why ? ”[91-emily] “ [I]126-jameson needed to be at work early . ”[126-jameson] “ [You]91-emily did n’t think to wake [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ [You]91-emily piss [me]0-i off . ”[0-i] “ Do n’t start [your]91-emily righteous shit with [me]126-jameson . [I]126-jameson ’ll leave when [I]126-jameson fucking want to . ”[126-jameson] The phone goes dead . [I]0-i inhale sharply ; [nobody]3121-nobody hangs up on [me]0-i . [Nobody]3121-nobody . [I]0-i clench [my]0-i jaw and throw [my]0-i phone onto the couch . [This woman]943-this woman is fucking infuriating . [I]0-i walk into [[my]0-i office]529-my office , open [my]0-i laptop , and log in to [my]0-i security footage . [I]0-i take a seat as [I]0-i wait for it to load . An image of [my]0-i front door comes up , and [I]0-i hit rewind and watch as it goes back in fast - forward . [I]0-i catch sight of [her]943-this woman leaving , and [I]0-i stop the film . What time was it ? It was 3:58 a.m. [She]943-this woman had to go to work early ? Bullshit . [She]943-this woman waited for [me]0-i to fall asleep and then immediately left . [I]0-i sit back in [my]0-i chair as [my]0-i anger escalates . “ [I]0-i do n’t know what the fuck [you]943-this woman ’re playing at , [Emily Foster]91-emily , but [I]0-i wo n’t have it . If [you]943-this woman ’re with [me]0-i , [you]943-this woman ’re with [me]0-i . And [you]943-this woman ’ll do as [I]0-i fucking say . ”[0-i] [I]0-i slam [my]0-i computer shut and storm [upstairs]3211-upstairs . [She]943-this woman ’s looking for a fight . [She]943-this woman just found one . An hour later , [I]0-i walk through [the foyer of [[my]0-i building]848-my building]946-the foyer of my building and out to [[my]0-i car]3526-my car . “ Good morning , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles . ”[152-alan] [Alan]152-alan smiles as [he]152-alan opens the door of [[my]0-i limo]949-my limo . “ Morning , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say as [I]0-i get in . The usual pile of newspapers is on the seat , along with [my]0-i coffee , and [I]0-i begin [my]0-i morning ritual . It takes [us]950-our forty minutes to drive the thirteen miles to [[my]0-i building]848-my building , so [I]0-i use this time to keep track of [[our]950-our competitors]3453-our competitors . [I]0-i flick through the pile and pick up the Gazette , [[our]950-our closest competitor]953-our closest competitor , and [I]0-i scan the front page . “ [Their]3453-our competitors formatting is appalling , ”[0-i] [I]0-i mutter under [my]0-i breath as [I]0-i flick it open . [I]0-i read page one and two , and then [I]0-i get to page three . Breaking News [The NYPD]29-the nypd has closed in on a top - secret investigation . The murder was originally attributed to [a man police had nicknamed Stoneface , who has been linked to [more than 85 burglaries in [Brooklyn]16-brooklyn , [New York]3-new york]955-more than 85 burglaries in brooklyn , new york]954-a man police had nicknamed stoneface , who has been linked to more than 85 burglaries in brooklyn , new york . But with DNA evidence , [investigators]956-investigators now believe the crimes were committed by [the same suspect that has been called the Red Ribbon Killer in [other parts of [the state]959-the state]958-other parts of the state]957-the same suspect that has been called the red ribbon killer in other parts of the state . “ With this filing , [we]963-police have officially linked [Stoneface]153-stoneface to [an individual known as the Red Ribbon Killer]3538-an individual known as the red ribbon killer , ”[154-matthew] said [Matthew Price]154-matthew , [[Brooklyn]16-brooklyn [County district attorney]961-county district attorney]960-brooklyn county district attorney . [Stoneface]153-stoneface , [an auto mechanic]962-an auto mechanic , is wanted after [police]963-police tracked [him]153-stoneface down by matching [his]153-stoneface DNA with a genealogy website . [He]153-stoneface has been accused of killing 5 and raping [45 people]964-45 people in what [police]963-police are describing as a premeditated crime spree . [He]153-stoneface was nicknamed [the Red Ribbon Killer]966-the red ribbon killer because [the victims]967-the victims had a red ribbon tied around [their]967-the victims neck after [they]967-the victims were murdered . [Police]963-police have tracked [his]153-stoneface whereabouts , and an arrest is expected today . “ Fuck . ”[963-police] It ’s [Emily]91-emily ’s story , just worded differently . [I]0-i take out [my]0-i phone and call [Tristan]135-tristan as [my]0-i blood pressure rises to boiling point . “ Hey , ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan answers . “ Page three of the Gazette , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ [You]135-tristan ’re joking ? ”[0-i] “ Nope . ”[151-chloe] “ Fucking hell . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan sighs . “ See [you]0-i soon . ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i hang up , and [my]0-i phone vibrates . The name [Chloe]151-chloe lights up the screen ; [I]0-i hit decline . [I]0-i sip [my]0-i coffee and stare out the window as contempt drips from [my]0-i every pore . It ’s one thing to be deceived , but to be sold out by [one of [[our]969-our own staff members]970-our own staff members]968-one of our own staff members is a whole new level of betrayal . When [I]0-i get [my]0-i hands on whoever is responsible for this , there will be fucking hell to pay . Half an hour later , [I]0-i walk into [[my]0-i office]529-my office and find three of [[my]0-i favorite people]972-my favorite people inside . [[My]0-i brothers]3514-my brothers . “ Hello . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk . “ Jesus , [you]3514-my brothers ’ve both got uglier since [I]0-i last saw [you]3514-my brothers . [I]0-i did n’t think it was possible . ”[0-i] [They]3514-my brothers chuckle , and [we]969-our hug . [I]0-i miss [[my]0-i brothers]3514-my brothers . [Their]3514-my brothers role in [the company]3166-the company requires [them]3514-my brothers to live in [the UK]976-the uk ; [they]3514-my brothers work out of [the London office]977-the london office . [I]0-i only get to see [them]3514-my brothers once a month when [I]0-i travel over [there]3073-there , [Tristan]135-tristan the same . Although [he]135-tristan gets to stay longer , so [he]135-tristan gets more time with [them]3514-my brothers . [I]0-i slap the Gazette onto [my]0-i desk . “ What the hell is this ? ”[0-i] “ Fucking hell , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan whispers as [they]3514-my brothers all take a seat around the board table . “ What ’s going on ? ”[155-elliot] [Elliot]155-elliot snaps . “ [I]155-elliot do n’t believe this . ”[155-elliot] [I]0-i exhale heavily . “ [We]3514-my brothers got [a new staff member]3221-a new staff member , [Emily Foster]91-emily . ”[155-elliot] [Tristan]135-tristan smirks , and [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . “ And ? ”[156-christopher] [Christopher]156-christopher interrupts . “ [She]3221-a new staff member ran a story on [her]3221-a new staff member second day and was n’t sure of the name of [the suspect]3540-the suspect , so [she]3221-a new staff member made one up on the spot and planned on changing it when [she]3221-a new staff member got back to [the office]444-the office . ”[156-christopher] [They]3514-my brothers frown as [they]3514-my brothers listen . “ Only [she]3221-a new staff member forgot . ”[156-christopher] “ Jesus . ”[155-elliot] [Elliot]155-elliot rolls [his]155-elliot eyes . “ [Useless]157-useless . ”[155-elliot] “ No , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan says . “ Diabolical . The exact same story ran in the Gazette the next day . . . with the bogus name . ”[135-tristan] [Elliot]155-elliot and [Christopher]156-christopher frown as [they]3514-my brothers listen . “ How do [you]156-christopher know this ? ”[156-christopher] [Christopher]156-christopher asks . “ [I]0-i know [the reporter]3542-the reporter . [We]979-we met a while ago . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause , not wanting to elaborate . “ [You]156-christopher know who [she]3542-the reporter is ? ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan smirks . “ Who ? ”[135-tristan] [Elliot]155-elliot ’s eyes flick between [us]979-we . “ Remember ages ago [Jay]158-jay got a motherfucking huge hickey ? ”[155-elliot] [Their]3514-my brothers faces fall . “ No . ”[155-elliot] [Elliot]155-elliot pinches the bridge of [his]155-elliot nose . “ Please . . . do n’t tell [me]155-elliot . ”[155-elliot] [He]155-elliot laughs out loud . “ What did [you]156-christopher call it ? Stopover shame . ”[155-elliot] “ [I]0-i had to wear a fucking turtleneck for two weeks . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh in disgust . “ Remember the black - tie dinner for [Mom]105-mom ’s charity ? ”[0-i] [Tristan]135-tristan throws [his]135-tristan head back and laughs . “ And [you]0-i had the hugest hickey [anyone]295-anyone had ever seen . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan chuckles at the memory . “ And [you]0-i had to hide from [Mom]105-mom all night and wear cover - up on [your]0-i neck . That was fucking hilarious , [man]3269-man . ”[135-tristan] “ Mortifying . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shiver as [I]0-i think back . “ Anyway , back to the story . ”[0-i] [I]0-i glare at [Tristan]135-tristan for bringing it up . “ [Emily]91-emily — that ’s [her]91-emily name — unbeknownst to [me]0-i got a job [here]275-here . [She]91-emily started three weeks ago , and then this mishap with the name happened . [She]91-emily came to [me]0-i with suspicions that something fishy was going on . A fake name that [she]91-emily made up on the spot was no coincidence . ”[0-i] [I]0-i look around at [[my]0-i brothers]3514-my brothers . “ [Our]3546-we stories are being sold on the black market . ”[0-i] “ For fuck ’s sake , ”[155-elliot] [Elliot]155-elliot snaps . “ [Our]3546-we share prices are dropping because [we]3546-we are no longer breaking news . ”[155-elliot] [Elliot]155-elliot shakes [his]155-elliot head in disgust . “ Because [the reporters that [we]3546-we are paying for]3547-the reporters that we are paying for are working for [our]3546-we competition , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan snaps . “ [We]3546-we tested the theory this week . [We]3546-we got [Emily]91-emily to write a bogus story and submit it through the regular channels , and look . ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i hit the paper with the backs of [my]0-i fingers . “ Here it is , page three of the Gazette . ”[0-i] [They]3514-my brothers all stare at the paper in front of [us]981-us , deep in thought . “ So . . . what do [we]3546-we do ? ”[3514-my brothers] “ Firing [everyone]3098-everyone works for [me]0-i , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ No , [we]3546-we have to do this properly . There are [a hundred people on that floor]3549-a hundred people on that floor . Not to mention [IT]3550-it and [the mailroom]3551-the mailroom . ”[0-i] [The boys]982-the boys break into chatter as [they]982-the boys discuss [our]981-us options . [I]0-i push [my]0-i intercom . “ Can [we]3546-we get [Richard]144-richard from legal up here , please ? ”[0-i] “ Yes , [sir]3064-sir . ”[0-i] “ Should [Emily]91-emily write another story so [we]3546-we can track it more closely ? ”[155-elliot] [Elliot]155-elliot asks . “ No , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ [I]0-i do n’t want [her]91-emily involved again . [I]0-i do n’t want [her]91-emily up here at all . ”[0-i] [Tristan]135-tristan smirks . “ [I]0-i ’m going to wipe that stupid smirk off [your]155-elliot face in a minute , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ Scared [she]91-emily ’s going to give [you]0-i another hickey ? ”[155-elliot] [Elliot]155-elliot jokes . “ Must have some pretty good suction going on . ”[155-elliot] [They]983-they all laugh . [I]0-i glare at [him]155-elliot . “ Cut the shit . [I]0-i ’m not in the fucking mood for this today . ”[0-i] There is a knock on the door . “ Come in , ”[0-i] [I]0-i call . [Richard]144-richard comes into view . “ Please take a seat . ”[144-richard] “ How can [I]144-richard help [you]0-i ? ”[144-richard] [He]144-richard smiles . “ [We]984-we have reason to believe that [someone on the news floor]3553-someone on the news floor is selling [our]984-we stories to [a competitor]3554-a competitor . How do [we]984-we legally handle this ? ”[144-richard] [Richard]144-richard frowns as [he]144-richard looks between [us]984-we . “ Are [you]144-richard sure ? ”[144-richard] “ Yes . ”[144-richard] “ Well . ”[144-richard] [He]144-richard exhales as [he]144-richard thinks . “ [You]0-i would hire [a corporate investigation firm]3555-a corporate investigation firm . ”[144-richard] “ What do [they]3555-a corporate investigation firm do ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [They]3555-a corporate investigation firm are business - centric and can involve verifying the legitimacy of [a business partner]3556-a business partner or deal , looking into loss or theft of proprietary information , identifying the potential of a damaged reputation , things like that . ”[0-i] “ No , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say as [I]0-i stand . “ [I]0-i do n’t want [a stranger in here]3557-a stranger in here sniffing around . What if the story breaks ? It will do more damage to [our]984-we reputation . ”[0-i] “ With all due respect , [Jameson]126-jameson , [I]144-richard do n’t see how [you]126-jameson have any other choice , ”[144-richard] [Richard]144-richard says . “ Do [you]144-richard know any ? ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan asks . “ No . But [I]135-tristan can find out who to use . ”[135-tristan] “ [I]0-i do n’t like it . ”[0-i] “ [They]3555-a corporate investigation firm ’re [professionals]3558-professionals . [They]3555-a corporate investigation firm deal with things like this all the time . [You]126-jameson wo n’t even know [they]3555-a corporate investigation firm are in [the building]412-the building , ”[144-richard] [Richard]144-richard continues . “ How does it work ? ”[144-richard] “ [They]3555-a corporate investigation firm usually come in undercover , act as [one of [the workers]3561-the workers]3560-one of the workers while [they]3555-a corporate investigation firm watch and trace . ”[0-i] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes in disgust . “ How ridiculous . This is n’t a fucking MacGyver episode . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stare at [[my]0-i brothers]3514-my brothers , and [I]0-i know [I]0-i ’ve been forced into a corner . There is no other way around this , and [I]0-i know [I]0-i must concede . “ Fine . ”[0-i] Emily An hour earlier [I]0-i power walk up [the street]654-the street among [the crowd]287-the crowd . [I]0-i ’ll never get used to [these busy [New York]3-new york sidewalks]988-these busy new york sidewalks no matter how long [I]0-i live [here]275-here . [I]0-i ’m exhausted . [I]0-i was up half the night having sex , and [I]0-i have n’t been back to sleep since [I]0-i left [Jameson]126-jameson ’s at four o’clock . God , what a nightmare this whole situation is . And who the fuck is [Chloe]151-chloe ? [I]0-i order [my]0-i iced coffee , and as [I]0-i wait , [I]0-i buy the Gazette at the newsstand . [I]0-i ’ll read it at lunch . [I]0-i wonder if [they]990-they have any jobs available . [I]0-i ’m probably going to need one soon . With a heavy heart , [my]0-i mind goes to [Jameson]126-jameson . Damn it , why does something always have to go wrong with [the men [I]0-i like]991-the men i like ? If only [he]126-jameson were just [a normal guy]992-a normal guy — with [a normal shitty apartment]993-a normal shitty apartment and [a shitty car]994-a shitty car and [no women]995-no women texting [him]126-jameson — [he]126-jameson would be perfect . In every way . [I]0-i get a vision of [us]996-we last night as [we]996-we made love and kissed for hours , and sadness sweeps over [me]0-i . [I]0-i hate that [we]996-we connect so deeply on a physical level . It ’s just sex , [[you]997-you idiot]998-you idiot . Bone - shattering , awesome , toe - curling sex . [I]0-i imagine [Jameson Miles]126-jameson would have that with [every woman [he]126-jameson ’s with]999-every woman he ’s with . [He]126-jameson ’s [that kind of guy with that kind of a dick]1000-that kind of guy with that kind of a dick . Ugh . [I]0-i take [my]0-i coffee and make the depressing walk to [the office]444-the office . [I]0-i ’m not thinking about [him]126-jameson today , and [I]0-i ’m most definitely not telling [him]126-jameson that [I]0-i know about [Chloe]151-chloe . Whoever [Chloe]151-chloe is . All [I]0-i know is that if [she]151-chloe ’s texting [him]126-jameson with where - are - [you]1002-you messages in the middle of the night , something ’s going on , and [he]126-jameson ’s all hers . [She]151-chloe can have [him]126-jameson . [I]0-i may be a lot of things , but [a man stealer]1003-a man stealer [I]0-i ’m not . [Douchebag]159-douchebag . How dare [he]126-jameson use [me]0-i for sex ? The bitter taste of betrayal lines [my]0-i mouth ; [I]0-i can act brave all [I]0-i want , but the truth is [I]0-i ’m upset . Last night was perfect — more than perfect — and then [he]126-jameson had to go and wreck it . [I]0-i thought [I]0-i spent the night with [Jim]90-jim , but instead [I]0-i got the sleazebag [Jameson Miles]126-jameson version . How did n’t [I]0-i see it ? [I]0-i trudge into [the building]412-the building and up to [[my]0-i floor]621-my floor , and [I]0-i fall into [my]0-i seat in disgust . “ Hi , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say . “ Hey . ”[0-i] [Aaron]110-aaron spins on [his]110-aaron chair toward [me]0-i . “ How did it go ? ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i glance up at the camera above . Is [he]110-aaron watching ? “ Good , ”[0-i] [I]0-i lie . “ [I]0-i ’ll tell [you]110-aaron about it tonight . [We]3562-we are drinking . ”[0-i] “ Drinking ? ”[110-aaron] “ Everything [we]3562-we see . ”[110-aaron] [His]110-aaron face falls . “ Oh . . . it went that kind of good . ”[110-aaron] “ Precisely , ”[0-i] [I]0-i mutter flatly . “ What ’s going on around here today ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron whispers . “ What do [you]110-aaron mean ? ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i look up from [my]0-i computer . “ [Tristan]135-tristan is buzzing around , and [Jameson]126-jameson has been down to the floor already . ”[0-i] “ What time is it ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i glance at [my]0-i watch . “ It ’s only eight forty - five . [They]3563-they are never down [here]275-here at this hour , if at all . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i know . ”[0-i] “ Hmm . ”[0-i] [I]0-i watch [Tristan]135-tristan as [he]135-tristan talks to [the floor manager]577-the floor manager , and [he]135-tristan seems to have a stern face on . “ Do [you]110-aaron think something ’s wrong ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [I]0-i do n’t know . Did [you]110-aaron piss [Mr. J]160-mr. j off last night ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk . “ Maybe [he]135-tristan ’s [upstairs]3211-upstairs throwing a tantrum . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i ’m probably about to get fired . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile happily as [I]0-i open [my]0-i computer . Good , [I]0-i hope [he]135-tristan ’s pissed . Two hours later , [I]0-i glance up and see [two men [I]0-i have n’t seen before]1007-two men i have n’t seen before . “ Who are [they]1007-two men i have n’t seen before ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [Molly]111-molly looks up , and [her]111-molly face falls . “ Oh [Lord]3566-lord have mercy . . . thank [you]0-i , [God]88-god . ”[111-molly] “ Huh ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ That ’s [Elliot]155-elliot and [Christopher Miles]156-christopher . [They]1007-two men i have n’t seen before ’ve flown in from [the UK]976-the uk . Must be a board meeting or something going on this week . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes widen . “ [[Jameson]126-jameson ’s brothers]3568-jameson ’s brothers ? ”[0-i] [She]111-molly smiles dreamily as [she]111-molly watches [them]1007-two men i have n’t seen before . “ Uh - huh . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly looks over to [Aaron]110-aaron , who is also openly staring . “ [I]110-aaron call [Elliot]155-elliot . ”[110-aaron] “ Good , because [I]110-aaron call [Christopher]156-christopher , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron whispers right back . “ Can [you]110-aaron please set [us]3569-us up on a brother date ? ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly whispers . “ Yes , and [we]3569-us need to swing , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron replies . “ Because [I]110-aaron want all four . [I]110-aaron ca n’t choose . ”[110-aaron] “ Can [you]110-aaron imagine ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly murmurs . “ Makes [me]111-molly blush just thinking of it . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly fans [her]111-molly face with [her]111-molly manila folder as [her]111-molly eyes stay glued to [the brothers]1008-the brothers . “ Imagine all of [them]1008-the brothers in bed together . . . taking turns with [your]110-aaron body . ”[111-molly] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes in disgust . “ [The Miles brothers]3570-the miles brothers are overrated , if [you]111-molly ask [me]0-i . ”[0-i] [They]1008-the brothers ’re not , though . [I]0-i ’m lying through [my]0-i teeth . All with dark hair , tall , and built . . . square jaws in [their]1008-the brothers designer playboy suits . Everything about [the four of [them]1008-the brothers]1009-the four of them screams power and gorgeousness . [Assholes]1010-assholes . [Jameson]126-jameson has n’t been to see [me]0-i today . [I]0-i have n’t heard from [him]126-jameson , and if the truth be known , [he]126-jameson ’s probably upstairs making out on [[his]126-jameson office]496-his office couch with [Chloe]151-chloe as [we]1012-we speak . Ugh . [I]0-i ’m off [all men]3100-all men . How could [I]0-i have been so stupid ? 4:30 p.m. “ Oh [my]111-molly God , did [you]0-i see the story in the Gazette ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly says . “ No , what ? ”[111-molly] “ [The Red Ribbon Killer]966-the red ribbon killer . [I]0-i do n’t even feel safe on [the subway]3572-the subway tonight . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes flick to [her]111-molly . “ What ? ”[0-i] “ Yeah , it ’s one of [their]1014-their lead stories today . [I]111-molly was reading it online just now . ”[111-molly] “ Are [you]0-i kidding [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i click onto [their]1014-their website and search for the story , and sure enough , the story comes up , almost word for word . . . [my]0-i words . [I]0-i put [my]0-i hand over [my]0-i mouth in horror as [I]0-i read it . Oh [my]0-i God . That ’s why [they]1014-their ’re all here today ; [they]1014-their ’re in damage control . [I]0-i stare at the story on [my]0-i computer . It ’s there in black and white , but [I]0-i ca n’t actually believe it . [I]0-i look at [all the people in [the office]444-the office]1015-all the people in the office acting calm and professional . Who is it ? [Thieving bastard]1017-thieving bastard . “ [I]0-i ’ve got to go and see [someone]401-someone . Back in a minute . ”[0-i] [I]0-i practically run to [the elevator]428-the elevator and take it to [the top floor]467-the top floor . Why did n’t [he]1017-thieving bastard say anything to [me]0-i ? “ Hello , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say as [I]0-i brush through reception . “ Excuse [me]742-the receptionist , [Emily]91-emily , ”[742-the receptionist] [the receptionist]742-the receptionist calls . “ [He]1017-thieving bastard ’s not taking [visitors]3219-visitors right now . ”[742-the receptionist] “ Whatever . ”[0-i] [I]0-i storm through to [[Jameson]126-jameson ’s office]3491-jameson ’s office , and [I]0-i knock on the door . “ Yes ? ”[1017-thieving bastard] [he]1017-thieving bastard barks . [I]0-i open the door to find [him]1017-thieving bastard sitting behind [his]1017-thieving bastard large desk ; blue eyes rise to meet [mine]0-i . “ What is it ? ”[1017-thieving bastard] [he]1017-thieving bastard asks coldly . [I]0-i walk in and close the door behind [me]0-i . “ [I]0-i saw the story . ”[0-i] “ And ? ”[0-i] “ Well . . . why did n’t [you]1017-thieving bastard tell [me]0-i ? It was [my]0-i story . [I]0-i thought [you]1017-thieving bastard would have at least told [me]0-i . ”[0-i] “ [Ms. Foster]146-ms. foster . ”[1017-thieving bastard] [He]1017-thieving bastard clenches [his]1017-thieving bastard jaw as if [I]0-i ’m a huge annoyance . “ [I]1017-thieving bastard do n’t have time to play [your]0-i juvenile games . ”[1017-thieving bastard] “ What does that mean ? ”[0-i] “ It means [I]1017-thieving bastard ’m very busy . ”[1017-thieving bastard] [He]1017-thieving bastard goes back to typing . [I]0-i stare at [him]1017-thieving bastard for a moment . What ? “ Close the door on [your]1017-thieving bastard way out , please . ”[0-i] The fucking nerve of [this man]327-this man . [He]1017-thieving bastard sleeps with [me]0-i while [he]1017-thieving bastard ’s seeing [someone else]1023-someone else and then has the audacity to treat [me]0-i like this . Something snaps deep inside [me]0-i . “ Who the hell do [you]1017-thieving bastard think [you]1017-thieving bastard are ? ”[1017-thieving bastard] “ Here [we]3575-we go , ”[1017-thieving bastard] [he]1017-thieving bastard mutters under [his]1017-thieving bastard breath . “ What ? ”[1017-thieving bastard] [I]0-i cry . “ Here [we]3575-we go ? Are [you]1017-thieving bastard fucking serious ? ”[0-i] [He]1017-thieving bastard rests [his]1017-thieving bastard chin on [his]1017-thieving bastard hand as [he]1017-thieving bastard glares at [me]0-i . “ What was last night ? Huh ? ”[1017-thieving bastard] [I]0-i cry . Alarm bells start screaming around [me]0-i . This is the worst thing [I]0-i could possibly do , but [I]0-i ’ve lost all control . “ [You]1017-thieving bastard ’re seeing [someone else]1023-someone else ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . “ Who ’s [Chloe]151-chloe , [Jameson]126-jameson ? ”[0-i] [His]1017-thieving bastard eyebrow rises , and [he]1017-thieving bastard stands and walks toward the door . “ Out . ”[1017-thieving bastard] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap in disbelief . “ [You]1017-thieving bastard ’re kicking [me]0-i out ? ”[0-i] “ What [I]1017-thieving bastard ’m doing is being professional . [I]1017-thieving bastard suggest [you]0-i do the same thing . ”[1017-thieving bastard] [He]1017-thieving bastard stands over [me]0-i . “ [You]1017-thieving bastard know what ? ”[1017-thieving bastard] [I]0-i whisper up at [him]1017-thieving bastard through tears of rage . “ [You]1017-thieving bastard can go fuck [yourself]1017-thieving bastard . ”[0-i] [He]1017-thieving bastard glares at [me]0-i . “ Not that it ’s any of [your]0-i business , but [Chloe]151-chloe is [[my]1017-thieving bastard masseuse]3577-my masseuse . [I]1017-thieving bastard had an appointment with [her]151-chloe last night that [I]1017-thieving bastard was n’t [home]3076-home for . Those text messages came through hours after [she]151-chloe sent them . ”[1017-thieving bastard] [I]0-i stare at [him]1017-thieving bastard as [my]0-i heart hammers in [my]0-i chest . “ Do not check [my]1017-thieving bastard fucking phone ever again . ”[1017-thieving bastard] [He]1017-thieving bastard sneers as [he]1017-thieving bastard turns [his]1017-thieving bastard back on [me]0-i and goes and sits back at [his]1017-thieving bastard desk . [I]0-i stare at [him]1017-thieving bastard through tears . [I]0-i feel . . . used . “ [I]1017-thieving bastard thought [we]3579-we had something . ”[1017-thieving bastard] “ So did [I.]1017-thieving bastard ”[1017-thieving bastard] [His]1017-thieving bastard cold eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ But [you]0-i fucked that up this morning when [you]0-i left like [a two - year - old]3580-a two - year - old . ”[1017-thieving bastard] [He]1017-thieving bastard turns back to [his]1017-thieving bastard computer . “ Do [you]0-i sleep with [[your]0-i masseuse]3581-your masseuse ? ”[1017-thieving bastard] [His]1017-thieving bastard eyes come to [mine]0-i . “ That is none of [your]0-i business . Now get out . ”[1017-thieving bastard] Chapter 9 [I]0-i storm out of [[his]1017-thieving bastard office]496-his office and down [the hall]729-the hall , and [I]0-i fall into [[the ladies]1026-the ladies ’ room]1027-the ladies ’ room . [I]0-i burst into [the stall]1028-the stall , sit down , and put [my]0-i head into [my]0-i hands . Embarrassment fills [me]0-i . [I]0-i just completely lost control and made a fool of [myself]0-i . [You stupid fucking idiot]1029-you stupid fucking idiot . [My]0-i heartbeat sounds through [my]0-i body , and [I]0-i ’m so angry right now that [I]0-i ca n’t even see straight . [His]1017-thieving bastard words come back to [me]0-i : But [you]0-i fucked that up this morning when [you]0-i left like [a two - year - old]3580-a two - year - old . God . Angry tears stream down [my]0-i face , and [I]0-i wipe them away as quickly as they appear . Stop crying , [[you]1029-you stupid fucking idiot baby]1031-you baby . [I]0-i ’m not even upset — [I’m]0-i angry . Now [I]0-i have to get off this floor without [anyone]295-anyone seeing [me]0-i . Why am [I]0-i fucking crying ? [I]0-i know why . Because [I]0-i ’m sleep deprived , and [I]0-i deserve to be treated better , that ’s why . [The fucking asshole]1033-the fucking asshole . Who the hell does [he]1033-the fucking asshole think [he]1033-the fucking asshole is ? The longer [I]0-i ’m in [here]275-here , the worse it is . [I]0-i wash [my]0-i face , dry [my]0-i eyes , and drop [my]0-i shoulders as [I]0-i steel [myself]0-i to walk past reception . [I]0-i ’m fine , fine . . . totally fine . [Jameson Miles]126-jameson does not have the power to affect [me]0-i at all . [I]0-i open the bathroom door and walk out , and [Tristan]135-tristan comes around the corner . [His]135-tristan face falls when [he]135-tristan sees [me]0-i . “ [Emily]91-emily ? ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan frowns . “ Are [you]0-i all right ? ”[135-tristan] “ Yes , of course . ”[0-i] [I]0-i storm past [him]135-tristan . “ [He]135-tristan ’s had a bad day , ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan calls after [me]0-i , and [my]0-i eyes fill with tears anew . Yeah , well . . . so have [I.]0-i “ Where have [you]0-i been ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly asks on [my]0-i arrival back to [my]0-i desk . “ [I]0-i went and saw [Ricardo]132-ricardo , ”[0-i] [I]0-i lie . “ So where do [you]0-i want to go tonight ? ”[0-i] “ Oh . ”[0-i] [I]0-i wince . [I]0-i ca n’t think of anything worse . “ [I]0-i ’m sorry , [guys]3486-guys . [I]0-i ’m going to bail . [I]0-i need to sleep . ”[0-i] “ But [we]3486-guys want to hear all the juicy details . ”[0-i] “ Oh . ”[0-i] [My]0-i heart sinks . [I]0-i do n’t want [them]1035-them to know that [I]0-i ’m [the world ’s biggest loser]1036-the world ’s biggest loser . “ [We]3486-guys did n’t meet up last night . [He]110-aaron pulled out . ”[1036-the world ’s biggest loser] “ What ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron frowns . “ Whatever . [I]110-aaron do n’t care . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i shrug , acting casual . [I]0-i wish [I]0-i had n’t told [them]1035-them anything at all about [him]110-aaron now . “ Yeah , that ’s okay . [I]110-aaron need to save money anyway . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron sighs as [he]110-aaron packs up [his]110-aaron computer . “ [You]111-molly coming ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly asks . “ [I]111-molly ’m just going to finish this up . ”[111-molly] [I]0-i open [my]0-i computer back up . The last thing [I]0-i want to do is give [the bastard]3485-the bastard a reason to fire [me]0-i . [I]0-i finish [my]0-i task , and finally , an hour later , [I]0-i close [my]0-i computer and head [downstairs]3304-downstairs . [I]0-i walk through the front doors and glance up to see [the black limo]1039-the black limo parked at the curb . Shit . [I]0-i look around nervously . Is [he]3485-the bastard in [there]3073-there ? Damn it , [I]0-i do n’t want to see [him]3485-the bastard . [I]0-i power walk across [the street]654-the street to [the safe haven of the café]1042-the safe haven of the café . [I]0-i order a drink and take a seat at the window . Great . [I]0-i drag [my]0-i hand down [my]0-i face . Seriously , what next ? This is the last thing [I]0-i need . “ Here [you]0-i go . ”[867-the waiter] [The waiter]867-the waiter smiles as [he]867-the waiter puts [my]0-i iced tea down in front of [me]0-i . “ Thank [you]0-i . ”[867-the waiter] [I]0-i watch [the driver]635-the driver across [the road]638-the road as [he]635-the driver leans on [the limo]811-the limo , and [I]0-i think back to the other night when [I]0-i was on [my]0-i knees , and [he]635-the driver tried to open the door , and it was locked . [I]0-i wonder how long [he]635-the driver ’s worked for [him]635-the driver , how much [he]635-the driver ’s seen . [I]0-i watch as [he]635-the driver answers the phone and then gets in [the car]422-the car and drives off . Huh ? Was [Jameson]126-jameson already inside [the car]422-the car ? Why did [he]635-the driver drive off ? That ’s weird . . . The front doors of [the building]412-the building open , and [a group of men]1050-a group of men walk out . Shit , it ’s [them]1050-a group of men . [I]0-i pick up the menu and cover [my]0-i face as [I]0-i peer through the window and across [the street]654-the street . [Tristan]135-tristan , [Elliot]155-elliot , [Christopher]156-christopher , and [Jameson]126-jameson . . . and [the blonde girl who was with [Tristan]135-tristan the other night]1052-the blonde girl who was with tristan the other night . [She]1052-the blonde girl who was with tristan the other night ’s super trendy , and [her]1052-the blonde girl who was with tristan the other night work clothes look like they belong in a modeling shoot . [The boys]982-the boys look so similar . [Elliot]155-elliot is the most like [Jameson]126-jameson , with dark hair and piercing blue eyes . Then [Tristan]135-tristan and [Christopher]156-christopher look alike , lighter hair with a curl . [They]1050-a group of men ’re talking as [they]1050-a group of men walk , and [Jameson]126-jameson says something with a straight face , and [they]1050-a group of men all laugh out loud . What did [he]126-jameson say ? [They]1050-a group of men walk around the corner . [Elliot]155-elliot puts [his]155-elliot hand affectionately on [Jameson]126-jameson ’s back as [they]1050-a group of men cross [the road]638-the road while deep in conversation . [I]0-i watch [them]1050-a group of men walk up [the street]654-the street and then into [a cocktail bar]1056-a cocktail bar . [I]0-i pinch the bridge of [my]0-i nose and close [my]0-i eyes with a huge sad sigh . Ugh , [I]0-i just want this day to be over . It ’s amazing what a weekend and some sleep can do for [a girl]446-a girl . [I]0-i march into [the building]412-the building on Monday like [the most powerful woman on earth]1059-the most powerful woman on earth . “ Good morning . ”[284-the security guard] [The security guard]284-the security guard smiles as [I]0-i walk through the security screen . “ Morning . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ Lovely day , is n’t it ? ”[0-i] “ Sure is . ”[284-the security guard] [He]284-the security guard winks as [I]0-i walk past [him]284-the security guard . To hell with [Jameson Miles]126-jameson . So what ? [We]1061-we had sex . So what ? It was great . But guess what ? [I]0-i do n’t care . [I]0-i ’m not letting [him]284-the security guard dull [my]0-i [New York]3-new york shine . [I]0-i moved [here]275-here to start a new and exciting life , and to be honest , the first three weeks have been pretty amazing . . . well , except last week . But [I]0-i ’m scratching that from the record , so it does n’t actually count . [I]0-i ’m moving onward and upward , and twelve months from now [I]0-i ’ll probably look back at this and laugh . [I]0-i make it to [[my]0-i floor]621-my floor to find [Ava]112-ava and [[her]112-ava friend]1064-her friend [Renee]161-renee talking by [the elevator]428-the elevator . “ Hi , [girls]3583-girls . ”[161-renee] “ Hi . ”[112-ava] [Ava]112-ava smiles . “ How are [you]112-ava ? ”[112-ava] “ Good . Great , actually . What are [you]3583-girls guys up to ? ”[161-renee] “ [We]3583-girls ’re discussing where [we]3583-girls want to go this weekend . ”[161-renee] “ Oh . ”[112-ava] “ Hey , [you]0-i should come clubbing with [us]3583-girls , ”[112-ava] [she]112-ava offers . “ Really ? ”[112-ava] “ Yeah , for sure . [We]3583-girls have a blast . ”[112-ava] “ [You]112-ava know what ? [I]0-i ’d love to . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ Awesome . ”[112-ava] [She]112-ava takes [her]112-ava phone out of [her]112-ava pocket and puts [my]0-i number in . “ [We]3583-girls usually meet up about eight or nine on Saturday night . ”[112-ava] “ For dinner first ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ No . ”[112-ava] [She]112-ava smirks . “ [We]3583-girls eat mac and cheese before [we]3583-girls go out and then buy hella expensive drinks . Priorities . ”[112-ava] [I]0-i laugh . “ Okay , sounds good . ”[0-i] [I]0-i make [my]0-i way to [my]0-i desk and find [Aaron]110-aaron already working . “ Hi . ”[110-aaron] “ Hi . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron says sadly . “ What ’s wrong ? ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i take [my]0-i seat . “ [I]110-aaron got stood up again last night . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron sighs . “ [I]110-aaron ’m just getting sick of this , [you]0-i know ? ”[110-aaron] “ Have [you]110-aaron talked to [him]110-aaron ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ No , [he]110-aaron ’s always working or got things going on or a legitimate excuse . Maybe [I]0-i ’m looking for problems that are n’t there . ”[0-i] “ Maybe , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply . “ Anyway , [you]110-aaron ’ll be glad to know that [I]0-i ’m in a much better mood today . ”[0-i] “ Really ? ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron smirks . “ What ’s [your]110-aaron secret ? ”[110-aaron] “ Sleep , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply . “ And [I]0-i ’m even going to start going to [the gym]3243-the gym on level three next week . Want to come with [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] “ Maybe . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron thinks about it . “ [We]3585-we could become [superhot fitness freaks]3586-superhot fitness freaks . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron chuckles . “ Yeah , okay . Are [you]110-aaron high ? ”[110-aaron] “ [I]0-i had such a shitty day on Friday , and [I]0-i ’m determined to change [my]0-i mind - set . ”[0-i] “ Good for [you]0-i . ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly arrives and puts [her]111-molly bag onto the desk with a bang . “ [Anybody]532-anybody want [a kid]3588-a kid ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i giggle . “ What now ? ”[0-i] “ Ugh . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly flops into [her]111-molly chair . “ So [you]0-i know how [Brad]128-brad got caught messaging [that girl]3589-that girl . [I]111-molly took [his]128-brad phone from [him]128-brad because [[his]128-brad father]3590-his father would n’t do it , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly snaps . “ Yeah . ”[111-molly] “ Well , [he]128-brad was angry , but [he]128-brad was n’t that pissed off , [you]0-i know ? ”[0-i] “ What do [you]0-i mean ? ”[0-i] “ Well , [he]128-brad was n’t hassling [me]0-i for [his]128-brad phone back all the time like normal , and [he]128-brad wanted to go to bed really early last night . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i listen . “ [I]110-aaron felt like something was off , so [I]110-aaron checked the hiding spot to see if [his]128-brad phone was still there , and it was . Then [I]110-aaron had this strange thought to check the SIM . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron chuckles , already knowing where this story is going . “ [The little shit]3591-the little shit had taken the SIM out and put it into an old phone . ”[110-aaron] “ Oh , crap . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i barge into [[his]128-brad bedroom]933-his bedroom , and sure enough , [he]128-brad is on [his]128-brad phone , and it is hidden under the covers . [I]0-i snatch it off [him]128-brad and lock [myself]0-i in [the bathroom]328-the bathroom while [I]0-i go through it . [He]128-brad ’s banging the door down , so [I]0-i know there is something on there that [he]128-brad does n’t want [me]0-i to see . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes widen as [I]0-i listen . “ Get this , ”[1066-she] [she]1066-she sneers . “ [Pure little Chanel]137-chanel has been sending [him]128-brad nudes too . ”[1066-she] [I]0-i frown . “ [This fifteen - year - old little girl]3594-this fifteen - year - old little girl is built like [a fucking Penthouse Pet]3595-a fucking penthouse pet . ”[0-i] [We]1067-we chuckle . “ Oh , it gets worse , ”[1066-she] [she]1066-she continues . “ While [I]1066-she ’m looking through [his]128-brad phone , a new message comes through from [her]3594-this fifteen - year - old little girl . ”[1066-she] “ What was it ? ”[1066-she] “ [I]0-i got a Brazilian like [you]0-i wanted . [You]0-i like ? ”[0-i] [My]0-i mouth falls open . “ Can [you]1066-she believe that message ? ”[0-i] Unable to help it , [I]0-i burst out laughing . “ [I]1066-she would find this funny , too , if it were n’t [[my]1066-she child]3596-my child , ”[1066-she] [she]1066-she whispers as [she]1066-she sits down at [her]1066-she desk . “ Then [Brad]128-brad had a complete meltdown and told [me]1066-she that if [I]1066-she call [[Chanel]137-chanel ’s parents]3597-chanel ’s parents , [I]1066-she ’m effectively committing social suicide for [him]128-brad as [his]128-brad whole reputation will be ruined and that [he]128-brad ’s never going to [school]419-school again . ”[1066-she] [She]1066-she hits [her]1066-she computer keyboard with a hard bang . “ That ’s true , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron replies . “ [You]0-i ca n’t call [[her]1066-she mother]3599-her mother . ”[110-aaron] “ So it ’s all right for [her]1066-she to call [me]1066-she , but [I]1066-she ca n’t call [her]1066-she ? ”[1066-she] [she]1066-she stammers . “ [I]0-i do n’t know , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [I]0-i probably would n’t call [[her]1066-she mother]3599-her mother either . ”[0-i] “ Well , what would [you]0-i do ? ”[1066-she] [she]1066-she asks . “ [I]1066-she ’d buy [him]3601-him a box of condoms , that ’s what [I]1066-she ’d do . ”[1066-she] [She]1066-she stares at [me]0-i , wide eyed . “ Because imagine if [he]3601-him got [her]1066-she pregnant , ”[0-i] [I]0-i add . “ Oh [my]1066-she God . ”[1066-she] [She]1066-she drags [her]1066-she hand down [her]1066-she face . “ [I]1066-she ca n’t deal with [boys]3602-boys . [They]3602-boys are so stupid . ”[1066-she] “ The amount of testosterone in [a male teenager]3603-a male teenager is ridiculous , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron replies casually . “ [I]110-aaron was jerking off four times a day when [I]110-aaron was fifteen . ”[110-aaron] [Molly]111-molly and [I]0-i wince . “ Four times a day ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . “ Do n’t [girls]3583-girls do that ? ”[0-i] [He]110-aaron frowns in surprise . “ No , ”[110-aaron] [we]1068-we both gasp . “ [Men]426-men are gross . ”[1068-we] [I]0-i fake a shiver in disgust . The phone on [my]0-i desk rings . “ Hello , ”[0-i] [I]0-i answer . “ Hello , [Emily]91-emily , this is [Sammia]116-sammia , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles ’s PA . ”[0-i] What does [she]1069-i want ? “ Hi . ”[1069-i] “ [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles asked [me]1069-i to let [you]91-emily know that [you]91-emily have a meeting in [[his]114-mr. miles office]496-his office in an hour . ”[1069-i] “ [I]1069-i ’m very busy today . Can [you]91-emily tell [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles that , unfortunately , [I]1069-i wo n’t be able to make it ? ”[1069-i] “ [He]114-mr. miles told [me]0-i that [your]91-emily attendance is mandatory , and [he]114-mr. miles ’s already spoken to [[your]91-emily manager]3607-your manager to get clearance . ”[0-i] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . Stupid twat . “ Fine . [I]0-i ’ll be there . Thank [you]91-emily . ”[0-i] Knock , knock . [I]0-i tentatively knock on [Jameson]126-jameson ’s door . “ Come in , ”[126-jameson] [his]126-jameson strong voice calls . [My]0-i stomach flips with nerves , and [I]0-i open the door . [Jameson]126-jameson sits alone at [his]126-jameson desk . [His]126-jameson eyes rise to meet [mine]0-i . “ [You]126-jameson wanted to see [me]126-jameson ? ”[126-jameson] “ Yes , please take a seat . ”[0-i] [I]0-i drop to the chair as [I]0-i clasp [my]0-i hands together with white - knuckle force . [His]126-jameson eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ How are [you]0-i ? ”[126-jameson] “ Good , thanks . ”[0-i] [I]0-i drop [my]0-i eyes to the desk . [I]0-i ’m not looking at those beautiful blue eyes . [He]126-jameson ’s like the snake from [The Jungle Book]30-the jungle book — one look in those hypnotic suckers , and [your]1070-your panties drop to the floor . “ Look at [me]126-jameson , please , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson commands . “ What do [you]126-jameson want , [Jameson]126-jameson ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ [I]0-i do n’t have time for [your]126-jameson games . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i want [you]126-jameson to look at [me]0-i . ”[0-i] [I]0-i drag [my]0-i eyes to [his]126-jameson . “ Why do n’t [you]126-jameson want to look at [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson for a moment . “ Because [I]0-i just find [your]126-jameson face really . . . punchable . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson smirks and leans back in [his]126-jameson chair , clearly amused . “ Is that so ? ”[126-jameson] “ Yeah , it is . ”[0-i] [I]0-i look around [[his]126-jameson office]496-his office . “ Can [we]3608-we talk about work ? ”[0-i] “ Later . Right now [I]126-jameson would like to talk about [your]126-jameson tantrum on Friday . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson would n’t . ”[126-jameson] “ [She]3609-she ’s [[my]0-i masseuse]3577-my masseuse . ”[0-i] “ Like [you]126-jameson said , it ’s none of [my]0-i business . ”[0-i] [I]0-i glare at [him]126-jameson , [my]0-i resting bitch face in full swing . “ [I]0-i was going to call [you]126-jameson last night . ”[0-i] Now it ’s [my]0-i turn to be amused . “ Do n’t waste [your]126-jameson time . [I]126-jameson would n’t have answered . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson runs [his]126-jameson thumbnail back and forth over [his]126-jameson bottom lip as [he]126-jameson watches [me]0-i , as if fascinated . “ Why are [you]0-i so snarky ? ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson ’m not snarky . [I]126-jameson ’m just not about to put up with shit from [an entitled asshole]3611-an entitled asshole . [You]0-i may be [a CEO here]3612-a ceo here , but . . . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson sits back and raises [his]126-jameson chin as if angered . “ Finish what [you]0-i wanted to say . ”[126-jameson] “ No . [I]0-i ’m good . ”[0-i] [I]0-i clench [my]0-i teeth together to stop [myself]0-i from elaborating . “ [I]126-jameson may be [the CEO]3206-the ceo [here]275-here . . . but what ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson demands as [he]126-jameson swivels on [his]126-jameson chair . “ [I]126-jameson was n’t angry with [you]0-i on Friday . [I]126-jameson left in the middle of the night because [I]126-jameson was confused . . . about a lot of things . [I]126-jameson was going to talk to [you]0-i when [I]126-jameson was thinking clearly because [I]126-jameson did n’t want to be [a drama queen]3615-a drama queen . ”[126-jameson] [Our]1072-our eyes are locked . “ And then [I]126-jameson came to [[your]0-i office]3302-your office , and [you]0-i treated [me]126-jameson like [a two - bit whore that [you]0-i ejaculated in the night before]3617-a two - bit whore that you ejaculated in the night before . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson clenches [his]126-jameson jaw . “ [I]126-jameson ’m [nobody ’s whore]3618-nobody ’s whore , [Jameson]126-jameson , least of all [yours]0-i . No job is worth [my]126-jameson self - respect . ”[126-jameson] The air crackles between [us]1072-our . “ So excuse [me]126-jameson if the privilege of sucking [your]0-i golden CEO dick does n’t excite [me]126-jameson any longer . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson rubs [his]126-jameson thumbnail back and forth over [his]126-jameson bottom lip as [his]126-jameson eyes hold [mine]1073-mine . “ Were [you]0-i on [the debating team]3619-the debating team , [Ms. Foster]146-ms. foster ? ”[126-jameson] “ What does that have to do with anything ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap , annoyed . “ [You]0-i make a good argument . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson licks [his]126-jameson bottom lip as [he]126-jameson tries to hide [his]126-jameson amusement . “ Impressive . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . [Sarcastic asshole]1074-sarcastic asshole . God , [he]1074-sarcastic asshole infuriates [me]0-i so bad . [I]0-i get an image of [myself]0-i diving over the desk and punching [him]1074-sarcastic asshole in the nose as hard as [I]0-i can . It would wipe that smug smirk off [his]1074-sarcastic asshole stupid face . [I]0-i ’m not even joking ; [his]1074-sarcastic asshole face really is punchable . “ Please , ”[0-i] [I]0-i mutter under [my]0-i breath . “ Please what ? ”[0-i] “ Please stop insulting [my]135-tristan intelligence . Run [[your]126-jameson meeting]3620-your meeting so [I]135-tristan can get back to work . [You]126-jameson ’re wasting [my]135-tristan time . ”[135-tristan] Knock , knock . “ Come in , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson calls . [Tristan]135-tristan puts [his]135-tristan head around the door and looks between [us]1075-us . “ Are [we]1075-us on ? ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i get the feeling that [Jameson]126-jameson told [them]1076-they to give [us]1075-us ten minutes alone before [they]1076-they joined [us]1075-us . “ Yes , come in , ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan replies coolly as [he]135-tristan rearranges some papers on [his]135-tristan desk . [They]1076-they all pile into [the office]444-the office , and [I]0-i straighten in [my]0-i chair . [These four men]1078-these four men together are an extreme sucker punch . Gorgeous overload . “ Hello . ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan smiles . “ [Emily]91-emily , this is [Elliot]155-elliot and [Christopher]156-christopher , [[our]1075-us brothers]3621-our brothers . ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i stand and shake both of [their]1078-these four men hands . “ Hello . ”[155-elliot] [Elliot]155-elliot and [Christopher]156-christopher smile . “ Hi . ”[156-christopher] “ Please be seated , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson commands . “ [Tristan]135-tristan , [you]135-tristan can do the honors , please . ”[126-jameson] “ Okay . So as per [our]1075-us meeting on Friday , [we]1075-us have recruited [a private corporate investigator to work on [your]135-tristan floor]3622-a private corporate investigator to work on your floor and get to the bottom of this mess . ”[156-christopher] “ Okay . ”[0-i] [I]0-i look between [them]1078-these four men . “ What [we]1075-us want [you]135-tristan to do is keep sending in bogus stories . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ Why ? ”[0-i] “ Because if there are a lot of stories going through that are bogus , it will be easier for [us]1075-us to trace . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sit back in [my]0-i seat , annoyed . “ And as [you]0-i can see — ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan continues . [Jameson]126-jameson holds [his]126-jameson hand up . “ Stop there . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson turns [his]126-jameson attention to [me]0-i . “ What is it , [Emily]91-emily ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson . “ What did [you]126-jameson want to say , then ? ”[126-jameson] [My]0-i eyes flick between [the four men]1079-the four men . “ With all due respect , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles , [I]0-i did n’t apply for [my]0-i dream job to do bogus stories . ”[0-i] “ Fair point , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson snaps as [he]126-jameson rubs [his]126-jameson thumb over [his]126-jameson fingertips . “ What ’s going to happen when this is all over ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [You]126-jameson will return to [your]126-jameson normal duties . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i would like that in writing , please , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . [Elliot]155-elliot smirks and drops [his]155-elliot head . [Jameson]126-jameson ’s eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ Very well . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson turns [his]126-jameson attention back to [Tristan]135-tristan . “ Please continue . ”[126-jameson] “ [The investigator]3623-the investigator will be starting next week on Monday , and [Emily]91-emily , [we]3624-we would like [you]91-emily to be [his]3623-the investigator eyes on the floor . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ [I]0-i do n’t really want to get involved in all this . ”[0-i] “ [You]91-emily involved [yourself]91-emily the moment [you]91-emily stepped through [[my]126-jameson office]529-my office door , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson replies . [I]0-i drop [my]0-i head . [God]88-god . “ [Emily]91-emily , if [you]91-emily could give [us]3626-us a few bogus stories to start with next Monday , that would be great . ”[88-god] “ Okay , what would [you]126-jameson like [me]126-jameson to write about ? ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson ’s eyes meet [mine]0-i . “ The first story [I]126-jameson would like to be about a fake prostitution racket . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i frown in question . “ Call [the ringleader]3627-the ringleader [a two - bit whore]3628-a two - bit whore . ”[0-i] The fucking nerve of [this man]327-this man . “ Okay . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile sweetly . “ [I]0-i have enough material to work with on that one . ”[0-i] “ Good . ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan smiles . “ Work on those stories , and [we]3626-us will touch base next Monday afternoon . ”[135-tristan] “ Yes , okay , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply as [I]0-i stand and walk toward the door . “ Sounds good . ”[0-i] “ [Emily]91-emily , [I]126-jameson ’d like to see [you]91-emily for a moment , please , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson replies calmly . [I]0-i stop on the spot . Seriously ? [The boys]982-the boys file out of [the office]444-the office . “ Bye , [Emily]91-emily , ”[982-the boys] [they]982-the boys call . “ Bye . ”[982-the boys] The door closes behind [them]982-the boys , and [Jameson]126-jameson stands and walks up behind [me]0-i . [I]0-i can feel the heat from [his]126-jameson body . The power [he]126-jameson emanates is like nothing [I]0-i ’ve ever felt . [He]126-jameson takes [my]0-i ponytail in [his]126-jameson hand and wraps it around [his]126-jameson knuckles three times and pulls [my]0-i head to the side to give [him]126-jameson access to [my]0-i neck . In slow motion , [he]126-jameson licks from [my]0-i collarbone to [my]0-i jaw with [his]126-jameson thick , strong tongue . [His]126-jameson lips go to [my]0-i ear . “ [I]126-jameson did n’t get to taste [you]0-i yet . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes as arousal runs through [my]0-i blood like a river rapid . Goose bumps scatter up [my]0-i spine . [I]0-i turn to [him]126-jameson , and [he]126-jameson takes [my]0-i hand and puts it over [his]126-jameson large erection in [his]126-jameson pants . Electricity zaps between [us]1083-us , and [our]1083-us eyes are locked . [My]0-i breathing becomes ragged . “ Can [I]126-jameson see [you]0-i tonight ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson breathes . [I]0-i squeeze [his]126-jameson dick as [my]0-i sex clenches in appreciation . “ No , [Jameson]126-jameson , [you]126-jameson ca n’t . ”[0-i] [I]0-i turn and walk out of [[his]126-jameson office]496-his office with [my]0-i heart hammering in [my]0-i chest . [I]0-i get into [the elevator]428-the elevator as [my]0-i body screams for [me]0-i to go back . Every molecule in [my]0-i body wants [that man]3067-that man . But [he]3067-that man ’s just [an asshole]785-an asshole . . . and [I]0-i ’m just [another groupie]1088-another groupie . It ’s not going to happen . [It]1089-it ’s Saturday night , and [we]1090-we are lined up to get into [Sky Bar]31-sky bar . [I]0-i ’m with [Ava]112-ava and [Renee]161-renee , and this is [[our]1090-we third club]1091-our third club . It ’s nearly midnight . [I]0-i ’m having the best time ever . [We]1090-we have laughed and danced and prick teased [every stupid man in [New York]3-new york]1092-every stupid man in new york . “ Why are [we]1090-we waiting here in line again ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ What was wrong with [the last place]3629-the last place ? ”[0-i] “ Nothing . [This place]459-this place is better , but it does n’t heat up until eleven . ”[1093-the doorman] “ Oh . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug . Gosh , [I]0-i know nothing about [New York]3-new york nightlife . [The doorman]1093-the doorman removes the red rope blocking the door and ushers [us]1090-we in , and [my]0-i breath catches . Wow , [this bar]1094-this bar is way up on [the fiftieth floor]1095-the fiftieth floor and has a huge balcony overlooking the city lights . There ’s [a dance floor]1096-a dance floor and [numerous cocktail bars]1097-numerous cocktail bars , and [the girls]1098-the girls are right — [the men]434-the men [here]275-here are another caliber . [I]0-i glance down at [myself]0-i nervously ; [I]0-i hope [I]0-i look all right . [My]0-i long dark hair is down , and [I]0-i ’m wearing a cream - colored fitted dress . [It]1101-it has long sleeves and a plunging neckline . [I]0-i splurged and bought [myself]0-i a new dress for tonight ; [I]0-i wanted to look nice . It ’s paying off ; [I]0-i ’ve never gotten so much male attention in [my]0-i life . Amazing what a tight dress and a little cleavage can do for [a girl]446-a girl . [We]1103-we order drinks and go and find a space to stand as [I]0-i look around in awe . [I]0-i ’ve never been in such [a cool nightclub]1104-a cool nightclub before . “ [This place]459-this place is insane . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile at [the girls]1098-the girls . “ Right ? ”[112-ava] [Ava]112-ava smiles . “ [The men here]3632-the men here are off the hook . ”[112-ava] “ And filthy rich , ”[161-renee] [Renee]161-renee adds . “ Who cares about rich ? ”[161-renee] [I]0-i smirk as [I]0-i sip [my]0-i drink . “ [Me]1098-the girls , ”[1098-the girls] [they]1098-the girls both reply in unison . “ If [you]0-i ’re going to be with [a guy]321-a guy , [he]321-a guy may as well be wealthy , if [you]0-i ask [me]112-ava . Fuck being with [a poor bastard]3634-a poor bastard . [I]112-ava ’m poor , and opposites most definitely attract , ”[112-ava] says [Ava]112-ava . [I]0-i laugh as [I]0-i listen to [them]1098-the girls . “ So who do [we]3635-we have [here]275-here tonight ? ”[112-ava] [Ava]112-ava says as [she]112-ava looks around [the club]1106-the club . “ What do [you]112-ava mean ? ”[112-ava] [I]0-i ask as [I]0-i watch [her]112-ava eyes scan [the room]613-the room . “ [This place]459-this place is [a huge celebrity hangout]3638-a huge celebrity hangout . ”[112-ava] “ Really ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i look around . “ [I]0-i would n’t even know [any celebrities]3639-any celebrities . ”[0-i] Over the next hour , [we]1108-we dance and laugh , and [Ava]112-ava explains to [me]0-i in great detail about who is who . Apparently , [the men]434-the men are all very impressive . [None]1110-none take [my]0-i fancy , though . [A gorgeous man]883-a gorgeous man comes up through [the crowd]287-the crowd and puts [his]883-a gorgeous man hands on [my]0-i thighs . “ Do [you]0-i want to dance ? ”[883-a gorgeous man] [he]883-a gorgeous man asks . [He]883-a gorgeous man ’s blond and big and totally in [my]0-i space , but the way [he]883-a gorgeous man looks , [I]0-i think [I]0-i can deal with it . “ Yes , [she]112-ava does , ”[112-ava] [Ava]112-ava stammers as [she]112-ava stares at [the god in front of [us]1114-us]1113-the god in front of us . [He]883-a gorgeous man grabs [my]0-i hand and drags [me]0-i to [the dance floor]1115-the dance floor , and [I]0-i give [[my]0-i friends]651-my friends a scared wave with [my]0-i fingertips as [my]0-i eyes widen . [Ava]112-ava blows [me]0-i a kiss and jiggles on the spot in excitement . “ What ’s [your]0-i name ? ”[883-a gorgeous man] [he]883-a gorgeous man asks as [he]883-a gorgeous man wraps [his]883-a gorgeous man arms around [me]0-i . [I]0-i put [my]0-i hands on [his]883-a gorgeous man shoulders as [I]0-i stare up at [him]883-a gorgeous man . “ [Emily]91-emily . What ’s [yours]0-i ? ”[0-i] “ [Rocco]162-rocco . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile up at [him]883-a gorgeous man . What a weird name . Gosh , [I]0-i feel tipsy . [I]0-i need to stop drinking . “ This is [your]0-i first time [here]275-here ? ”[883-a gorgeous man] [he]883-a gorgeous man says , as if [he]883-a gorgeous man already knows the answer . “ How do [you]883-a gorgeous man know that ? ”[883-a gorgeous man] [I]0-i smirk . “ [I]0-i would have noticed [you]883-a gorgeous man if [you]883-a gorgeous man were here before . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile bashfully . [His]883-a gorgeous man hands roam down to [my]0-i behind , and [I]0-i lift them back to [my]0-i waist . “ [You]883-a gorgeous man ’re very forward , [Rocco]162-rocco . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i know what [I]0-i want when [I]0-i see it . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile as [he]883-a gorgeous man leans in and puts [his]883-a gorgeous man lips to [my]0-i ear . “ [I]883-a gorgeous man want [you]0-i , ”[883-a gorgeous man] [he]883-a gorgeous man breathes . Chapter 10 [Jameson]126-jameson “ Hmm , not bad , ”[156-christopher] [Christopher]156-christopher murmurs as [an attractive redhead]1117-an attractive redhead walks past [us]1118-us . [We]1118-us both watch [her]1117-an attractive redhead as [she]1117-an attractive redhead saunters over to [the bar]534-the bar . [She]1117-an attractive redhead ’s wearing a tight black dress , and [she]1117-an attractive redhead has a perfectly rounded ass . [I]0-i scrunch [my]0-i nose up in distaste . “ Average . ”[0-i] “ [She]1117-an attractive redhead is not average . ”[156-christopher] [His]156-christopher eyes drop to [her]1117-an attractive redhead behind and stay firmly fixed . “ Far from it , actually . ”[156-christopher] “ Not doing it for [me]0-i . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh against [my]0-i glass as [I]0-i look around [the crowded club]1120-the crowded club . It ’s a rarity that [a woman]381-a woman catches [my]0-i attention these days , with the exception of [Little Miss Snarky]163-little miss snarky . [I]0-i ca n’t get enough of [her]1117-an attractive redhead . . . even if [she]1117-an attractive redhead is completely unmanageable . [Our]1122-our exchange in [[my]0-i office]529-my office on Monday runs through [my]0-i mind , and [I]0-i exhale heavily . [She]1117-an attractive redhead ’s so fucking difficult . It would help if [I]0-i could keep [my]0-i mouth shut when [I]0-i see [her]1117-an attractive redhead . For some reason , [she]1117-an attractive redhead has [me]0-i blurting out demands and grabbing [her]1117-an attractive redhead by the hair ; it ’s as if [my]0-i body takes on a need of its own and completely leaves [my]0-i brain out of the equation . Every time [Emily]91-emily leaves [[my]0-i office]529-my office in a huff , [I]0-i kick [myself]0-i for handling [her]1117-an attractive redhead the wrong way . [I]0-i know [women]300-women ; [I]0-i know how [they]300-women think , and [I]0-i can usually get [them]300-women to do whatever [I]0-i want . [Her]1117-an attractive redhead . . . not so much . [Christopher]156-christopher licks [his]156-christopher lips as [he]156-christopher watches [the redhead]1126-the redhead . “ [I]156-christopher ’m going in . ”[156-christopher] [He]156-christopher strides across [the club]1106-the club and says something to [her]1126-the redhead as [she]1126-the redhead stands at the bar , and in slow motion , [she]1126-the redhead smiles up at [him]156-christopher . [I]0-i smirk and sip [my]0-i drink as [I]0-i watch [him]156-christopher in action . [He]156-christopher loves [women]300-women — [all women]1129-all women . It seems to be a family trait ; [we]1130-we ’re all wired the same way . Something ’s changed for [me]0-i lately , though . [My]0-i appetite for variety has waned . Something ’s off , and [I]0-i ca n’t quite put [my]0-i finger on it . [I]0-i glance over to [Tristan]135-tristan and [Elliot]155-elliot as [they]1131-they talk to [two girls in [the lounge]273-the lounge]1132-two girls in the lounge . [The women]435-the women are being all animated and laughing on cue at everything that comes out of [the boys]982-the boys ’ mouths . [Bimbos]164-bimbos . [I]0-i sip [my]0-i drink as [I]0-i look around [the room]613-the room . “ Hey , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan says as [he]135-tristan comes to stand beside [me]0-i . “ Look who ’s here . ”[135-tristan] “ Who ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i mutter , uninterested . “ Cream - colored dress , hair down , and looking absolutely fucking sensational . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i look over to where [he]135-tristan is gesturing . It ’s [her]1137-her . [Emily]91-emily is here . A broad smile crosses [my]0-i face . “ Well , well . The night just got interesting . ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan chuckles . “ That ’s if [you]0-i do n’t kill [each other]351-each other first . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan slaps [me]0-i on the back . “ [I]135-tristan ’m going to [the bar]534-the bar . ”[135-tristan] “ Yeah , okay . ”[91-emily] [She]91-emily ’s with [two women [I]0-i ’ve never seen before]1138-two women i ’ve never seen before , although [they]1138-two women i ’ve never seen before do look vaguely familiar ; [they]1138-two women i ’ve never seen before might be from work . [They]1138-two women i ’ve never seen before ’re talking and laughing . [Emily]91-emily is wearing a tight cream - colored dress with long sleeves and a plunging neckline . [I]0-i can see every curve on [her]91-emily delicious body , and [my]0-i cock swells in appreciation . [Her]91-emily hair is down , and [she]91-emily pulls it over to one side as [she]91-emily talks , and [I]0-i see the curve of [her]91-emily bare neck ; [my]0-i stomach clenches in excitement . Fuck . . . [she]91-emily ’s hot . [I]0-i ’ve never had such an intense physical reaction to [a woman like this]1139-a woman like this before . [I]0-i just ca n’t get enough of [her]91-emily body . The more [I]0-i have [her]91-emily , the more [I]0-i want [her]91-emily . If only [she]91-emily did n’t have the snarkiest damn attitude [I]0-i ’ve ever seen . Maybe that ’s the appeal ? [Most women]1140-most women fall at [my]0-i feet ; [she]91-emily seems determined to push [me]0-i away . Hmm . That ’s something to think about . If the truth be known , [I]0-i should stay away from [her]91-emily . [She]91-emily works for [me]0-i , [she]91-emily ’s [a firecracker]1141-a firecracker , and who knows what [she]91-emily will do if [we]1142-we fight again . [I]0-i smirk . [I]0-i already know that [we]1142-we will fight again — the writing is on the wall . [She]91-emily has a way of pissing [me]0-i off like no other . A song comes on that [she]91-emily obviously likes , and [she]91-emily starts to dance on the spot . [Her]91-emily ass slowly moves to the tantric beat , and [I]0-i stand and stare , transfixed by [the goddess in front of [me]0-i]1143-the goddess in front of me . [She]91-emily has no idea how fucking sexy [she]91-emily is . “ [New York]3-new york sour , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan says as [he]135-tristan hands [me]0-i [my]0-i drink . “ Thanks . ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i take it from [him]135-tristan . “ [You]135-tristan know , the way [you]135-tristan ’re looking at [her]91-emily is illegal in [some countries]3643-some countries , right ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i watch [her]91-emily hips roll , and [I]0-i imagine [them]1144-them over [me]0-i doing the same thing . [I]0-i inhale sharply as [my]0-i arousal starts to thump between [my]0-i legs . “ Have [you]135-tristan ever been so physically attracted to [someone]401-someone that [you]135-tristan lose the ability to think around [them]401-someone ? ”[0-i] “ No . Thank fuck , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan replies as [he]135-tristan watches [her]91-emily dance . “ Although with that ass , [I]135-tristan can imagine — ”[135-tristan] “ Do n’t even fucking look at [her]91-emily ass , or [I]0-i will sit [you]135-tristan on [yours]135-tristan , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say , cutting [him]135-tristan off . [He]135-tristan chuckles . “ Look at [you]0-i getting all territorial . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan sips [his]135-tristan drink as mischief fills [his]135-tristan face . “ [She]91-emily did want to report to [me]135-tristan with that story , [you]135-tristan know . ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i look at [him]135-tristan flatly . “ And [you]135-tristan report to [me]0-i , [fucker]3645-fucker . Go near [her]91-emily , and [you]135-tristan will fucking die . ”[0-i] [He]135-tristan throws [his]135-tristan head back and laughs out loud . [A blond man]1145-a blond man walks over to [her]1146-her and says something , and [she]1146-her smiles up at [him]135-tristan . “ Oh , look out , ”[1146-her] [Tristan]135-tristan teases . “ Competition is on the horizon . ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i watch as uneasiness begins to swirl . [His]1145-a blond man hands go to [her]1146-her thighs , and [I]0-i clench [my]0-i jaw . [I]0-i sip [my]0-i drink as [I]0-i watch . [He]1145-a blond man says something , and [she]1146-her laughs out loud before [he]1145-a blond man takes [her]1146-her hand and leads [her]1146-her to [the dance floor]1115-the dance floor . Are [you]135-tristan fucking kidding [me]0-i ? [Tristan]135-tristan turns and laughs when [he]135-tristan sees [my]0-i face . “ Well , this is about to get interesting . ”[135-tristan] [The blond]1148-the blond slides [his]1148-the blond hands down to [her]1146-her behind , and [she]1146-her lifts [his]1148-the blond hands back to [her]1146-her waist . [I]0-i watch as the sky turns red . Get [your]135-tristan fucking hands off [her]1146-her . [He]1145-a blond man says something , and [she]1146-her laughs out loud . [I]0-i swallow the lump in [my]0-i throat . So this is what [she]1146-her ’s here for , is it ? To pick up [a man]3093-a man . [Fury]165-fury begins to fill [me]0-i . “ Looks like [your]1146-her territory is about to be stolen . ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan smirks . “ Shut the fuck up , [Tris]135-tristan , before [I]0-i knock [you]135-tristan out , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap as [my]0-i eyes stay glued to them . [The blond]1148-the blond leans down and kisses [her]1146-her neck . Something inside [me]0-i snaps , and before [I]0-i know what [I]0-i ’m doing , [I]0-i ’m on the dance floor beside [them]1151-them . “ Fuck off , ”[0-i] [I]0-i growl . [Emily]91-emily turns to [me]0-i , and [her]91-emily face instantly drops . “ [Jameson]126-jameson , ”[91-emily] [she]91-emily stammers . [My]0-i arm goes around [her]91-emily waist , and [I]0-i pull [her]91-emily from [his]1148-the blond grip . “ [She]91-emily ’s here with [me]91-emily . ”[91-emily] [Emily]91-emily Oh [my]0-i God , what the hell is [Jameson]126-jameson doing [here]275-here ? [I]0-i step back from [the blond god]1153-the blond god , and [he]1148-the blond grabs [me]0-i and pulls [me]0-i back toward [him]1148-the blond . “ Do n’t , ”[1148-the blond] [he]1148-the blond snaps . “ Do n’t [you]0-i , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson growls . [He]126-jameson pulls [me]0-i out of [the guy]3334-the guy ’s arms and holds [me]0-i against [his]1148-the blond chest . “ [I]126-jameson said [she]3334-the guy ’s with [me]126-jameson , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson repeats . [The guy]3334-the guy stares at [me]0-i , and [I]0-i nod softly . [I]0-i do n’t want any trouble , and [I]0-i just want [this guy]289-this guy to disappear . “ [I]0-i ’m with [him]289-this guy , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . With one last look between [Jameson]126-jameson and [me]0-i , [he]3334-the guy turns and storms off toward [the bar]534-the bar . [I]0-i turn [my]0-i attention to [Jameson Miles]126-jameson , [the infuriating prick]1158-the infuriating prick , and [I]0-i pull out of [his]126-jameson arms . “ What do [you]126-jameson think [you]126-jameson ’re doing ? ”[0-i] “ What do [you]0-i think [you]0-i ’re fucking doing ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson growls . “ Do n’t [you]0-i swear at [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] “ [You]126-jameson came here to pick up [a man]3093-a man ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i put [my]0-i hands on [my]0-i hips in outrage . “ [I]0-i came here to dance . What are [you]126-jameson doing here ? ”[0-i] “ [I]126-jameson ’m here with [[my]126-jameson brothers]3514-my brothers . ”[126-jameson] “ So go back to [[your]0-i brothers]3648-your brothers and ruin [their]3648-your brothers fun , ”[0-i] [I]0-i huff . [I]0-i go to turn , and [he]126-jameson grabs [my]0-i arms and pulls [me]0-i to the side of [the dance floor]1115-the dance floor and pushes [me]0-i up against the wall . [His]126-jameson body covers [mine]0-i , and [I]0-i can feel [his]126-jameson hard erection up against [my]0-i stomach . [We]1160-we stare at [each other]351-each other , and instantly the air between [us]1160-we changes . “ Do n’t , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper up at [him]126-jameson . “ Do n’t what ? ”[0-i] “ Hypnotize [me]126-jameson with that magical dick . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson gives [me]0-i a cheeky wink . “ [You]0-i ’ve got that the wrong way around , [baby]3139-baby . [I]126-jameson ’m [the only one who ’s hypnotized around here]3650-the only one who ’s hypnotized around here , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers as [he]126-jameson leans down toward [me]0-i . [His]126-jameson tongue slowly slides through [my]0-i lips . [He]126-jameson kisses [me]0-i again , with just the right amount of suction , and [my]0-i knees begin to buckle beneath [me]0-i . [Dear God]88-god . . . [the man]265-the man can kiss . “ [Jameson]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i breathe against [him]126-jameson . “ [We]3651-we should n’t . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson hands roam up and down [my]0-i body , and [God]88-god , [he]126-jameson feels so good . “ Do n’t fight [me]126-jameson on this , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson murmurs as [he]126-jameson grinds [me]0-i up against the wall with [his]126-jameson hips . “ [I]126-jameson ca n’t . ”[126-jameson] “ [You]0-i can , and [you]0-i will . Why would [you]0-i deny [your]0-i body what it so desperately needs from [me]126-jameson ? ”[126-jameson] Oh God , [he]126-jameson ’s so right . [My]0-i body does need [his]126-jameson body . . . hard . So fucking hard . [Our]1163-we kiss turns desperate , and [my]0-i hands go to [his]126-jameson hair . [I]0-i know this is crazy , but [I]0-i want [him]126-jameson . . . all of [him]126-jameson , and not just [his]126-jameson body . For a long time , [we]1163-we kiss like [we]1163-we ’re [the only two people left on [earth]1165-earth]1164-the only two people left on earth . Hidden up against the wall , [his]126-jameson body grinding on [mine]0-i . Two bodies chasing [their]1166-their own pleasure in the darkness . “ [I]126-jameson need [you]0-i , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson murmurs against [my]0-i lips . [I]0-i pant as [his]126-jameson open mouth drops to [my]0-i neck . [God]88-god . . . the way [he]126-jameson touches [me]0-i is just so . . . “ [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] “ Now . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson pins [me]0-i to the wall , and [I]0-i feel [his]126-jameson cock pulse . Jesus , [he]126-jameson ’s close . [He]126-jameson does need [me]0-i . “ [[My]126-jameson place]3652-my place , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson pants against [my]0-i lips . “ [[My]126-jameson place]3652-my place , ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i fire back . “ No , [[my]126-jameson place]3652-my place , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson demands . [I]0-i pull back to look at [his]126-jameson face . “ It ’s [[my]0-i place]3652-my place or nothing . Take it or leave it . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson clenches [his]126-jameson jaw ; it ’s obvious [he]126-jameson hates losing a fight . . . any fight . “ Fine . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson grabs [my]0-i hand . “ This way . ”[126-jameson] “ No . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pull [my]0-i hand out of [his]126-jameson grip . “ [I]0-i do n’t want [anyone]295-anyone to see [us]3657-us . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson frowns in question . “ [You]126-jameson ’re [[my]0-i boss]3305-my boss , ”[0-i] [I]0-i remind [him]126-jameson . “ [I]0-i ’m here with [work friends]3659-work friends . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson rolls [his]126-jameson eyes . “ Fine . Go and say goodbye , and [I]126-jameson ’ll wait for [you]0-i [downstairs]3304-downstairs . [You]0-i have two minutes before [I]126-jameson come up and drag [you]0-i out . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson gives [me]0-i a long , lingering kiss , and [I]0-i turn , and [he]126-jameson swats [me]0-i on the behind . Adrenaline courses through [my]0-i veins as [I]0-i walk over to [[my]0-i friends]651-my friends . [He]126-jameson ’s here . [I]0-i ’m going with [him]126-jameson . It ’s on . Excitement fills [me]0-i , and [I]0-i try to act casual . “ Hey , where ’s [the god]3428-the god ? ”[161-renee] [Renee]161-renee asks . “ Oh . ”[161-renee] [I]0-i frown . “ [He]126-jameson was [a dick]323-a dick , ”[0-i] [I]0-i lie . [Ava]112-ava rolls [her]112-ava eyes . “ Typical . [Men who look that good ca n’t be blessed with brains]3663-men who look that good ca n’t be blessed with brains too . ”[112-ava] [I]0-i smirk . [I]0-i know [someone who was blessed with both]1168-someone who was blessed with both , but [I]0-i ’ll just keep that under [my]0-i hat . [I]0-i look over and see [Jameson]126-jameson walking toward [the elevator]428-the elevator , and [he]126-jameson gives [me]0-i the hurry - up look . [I]0-i smile ; the pull to [him]126-jameson is strong . “ [Guys]3486-guys , [I]0-i ’m going to go . ”[0-i] “ What ? ”[1170-they] [Their]1170-they faces fall . “ Why ? The night is young . ”[1170-they] “ [I]0-i know . [I]0-i ’ve had such a great time , but [my]0-i feet are killing [me]0-i . These stupid new shoes are hell on earth . Next weekend [I]0-i ’ll make it up to [you]3486-guys . [I]0-i promise . [I]0-i ’ll just jump in [a cab]3509-a cab [downstairs]3304-downstairs . ”[0-i] “ Okay . ”[1170-they] [They]1170-they roll [their]1170-they eyes and kiss [me]0-i on the cheek . “ Text [me]112-ava when [you]0-i get [home]3076-home , ”[112-ava] [Ava]112-ava says . “ [I]112-ava will . ”[112-ava] [I]0-i smile , grateful that [they]1170-they are n’t bothered at all . “ Thanks for asking [me]1171-two guys to come . ”[1171-two guys] [Two guys]1171-two guys walk up to [us]1172-us , and [the girls]1098-the girls both smile broadly . [I]0-i take that as [my]0-i out . “ See [you]1170-they , ”[0-i] [I]0-i call as [I]0-i walk toward [the elevator]428-the elevator . “ Bye , ”[1170-they] [they]1170-they call . [I]0-i jump in [the elevator]428-the elevator . “ Where to ? ”[301-the attendant] [the attendant]301-the attendant asks . “ [Ground floor]3668-ground floor . ”[301-the attendant] [He]301-the attendant pushes the button , and [we]1172-us make [our]1172-us descent . [My]0-i heart is hammering in [my]0-i chest . [Jameson Miles]126-jameson makes [me]0-i nervous as all hell . [I]0-i ca n’t remember when [a man]3093-a man made [me]0-i this excited to get [him]126-jameson alone . Act cool . . . just act cool . The elevator doors open , and [I]0-i walk out and look around . Where is [he]126-jameson ? [I]0-i continue through [the foyer]799-the foyer and peer out to [the busy street]1179-the busy street ; [I]0-i ca n’t see [him]126-jameson . What the hell ? Did [he]126-jameson leave without [me]0-i ? “ Lose something ? ”[126-jameson] a deep voice asks from behind [me]0-i . [I]0-i turn to see [Jameson]126-jameson leaning up against the wall , and [my]0-i heart somersaults in [my]0-i chest . [I]0-i walk over , and [he]126-jameson takes [me]0-i in [his]126-jameson arms . “ [I]126-jameson did , actually . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smile up at [him]126-jameson . [We]1180-we kiss softly , and it ’s different from how [we]1180-we normally kiss ; it ’s tender and sweet , as if [he]126-jameson ’s been waiting to get [me]0-i alone too . “ Let ’s go [home]3076-home , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . [I]0-i smile . That sounds so good . “ Okay . ”[1180-we] [We]1180-we walk out [the front]1181-the front , and [he]126-jameson hails [a cab]3509-a cab . Ten minutes later , [we]1180-we pull up in front of [[my]0-i apartment]940-my apartment . “ Thank [you]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say as [I]0-i climb out . [I]0-i turn and hand [Jameson]126-jameson twenty dollars , and [he]126-jameson shakes [his]126-jameson head as if annoyed . “ [I]126-jameson ’ve got it , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says . [He]126-jameson climbs out , and [we]1180-we walk through [the foyer]799-the foyer , hand in hand , as [he]126-jameson remains silent . “ Where are [the doormen]3670-the doormen ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks as [he]126-jameson looks around . “ There are [no doormen]3671-no doormen . ”[126-jameson] “ There ’s no security in [this building]3164-this building ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson frowns in surprise . “ There ’s security . ”[0-i] [I]0-i point to the intercom on the wall . “ [Nobody]3121-nobody can get up without being let in . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson frowns as [he]126-jameson assesses it . “ [Any fucker]3674-any fucker could walk in [here]275-here . ”[126-jameson] “ [You]126-jameson are [said fucker]3676-said fucker tonight . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk . [He]126-jameson chuckles as [he]126-jameson wraps [his]126-jameson arms around [me]0-i . “ That [I]126-jameson am . ”[126-jameson] [We]1185-we ride to [[my]0-i floor]621-my floor and walk down [the corridor]728-the corridor ; [my]0-i heart is beating so fast . This is different from the other times [we]1185-we ’ve been together . Normally [we]1185-we ’re so blinded with arousal that [we]1185-we do n’t even remember walking through the front door . [I]0-i open the door and lead [him]126-jameson into [[my]0-i apartment]940-my apartment , and [I]0-i hold [my]0-i breath as [his]126-jameson eyes scan [the space]863-the space . [[My]0-i apartment]940-my apartment is tiny — it would literally fit into [[his]126-jameson bedroom]933-his bedroom . “ It ’s nice , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says . [I]0-i giggle . “ [You]0-i ’re [a terrible liar]3677-a terrible liar . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson chuckles and takes [me]0-i into [his]126-jameson arms . “ Anywhere with [you]0-i is good . ”[126-jameson] [Our]1192-us eyes lock , and something changes between [us]1192-us . The anger and animosity between [us]1192-us has been replaced with tenderness . [The man [I]0-i met in [Boston]11-boston]1193-the man i met in boston is [here]275-here . “ Are [you]126-jameson hungry ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [We]1192-us could get some Uber Eats . Caramel cheesecake . ”[0-i] “ What the fuck ? [You]0-i do n’t actually get Uber Eats , do [you]0-i ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks , horrified . “ All the time . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug . “ Are [you]0-i serious ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson stammers . “ [You]0-i actually give [strangers]3678-strangers access to [your]0-i food ? ”[126-jameson] “ [They]3678-strangers ’re [delivery drivers]3679-delivery drivers . Why would n’t [I]0-i ? ”[0-i] “ [They]3678-strangers see a meal for one . Put some Rohypnol into [your]0-i food , wait for half an hour until [they]3678-strangers know [you]0-i ’ve eaten it and are unconscious , and then come back , break in , and take advantage of [your]0-i body . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson dusts [his]126-jameson hands in front of [him]126-jameson . “ Boom , easiest crime in history . ”[126-jameson] [My]0-i face falls . “ What ? ”[0-i] God , [I]0-i ’ve never thought of that . “ True story , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says as [he]126-jameson walks around [[my]0-i apartment]940-my apartment . “ If [I]126-jameson were [a rapist]3680-a rapist , that ’s what [I]126-jameson would do . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson do n’t know whether to be impressed or terrified by [your]0-i evil thought process . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson turns back to [me]0-i , and [his]126-jameson face softens . “ Impressed — let ’s go with impressed . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i giggle as [he]126-jameson takes [me]0-i into [his]126-jameson arms . “ Okay , ”[0-i] [I]0-i murmur . “ Impressed it is . Why have [you]126-jameson been so cranky with [me]0-i this week ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask softly as [I]0-i run [my]0-i fingers through [his]126-jameson dark hair . “ Because [you]0-i ’re fighting with [me]126-jameson , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . “ [I]126-jameson do n’t like it . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson lips take [mine]0-i , and [his]126-jameson tongue swipes softly through [my]0-i lips . “ [I]126-jameson ’m not fighting now . ”[126-jameson] “ And look how fucking beautiful [you]0-i are , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says tenderly as [he]126-jameson cups [my]0-i face in [his]126-jameson hands . [Our]1196-our kiss deepens , and [I]0-i want [him]126-jameson naked . In [my]0-i bed and naked . [I]0-i slide [his]126-jameson shirt off over [his]126-jameson head and unzip [his]126-jameson pants ; [his]126-jameson lips stay locked on [mine]0-i as if [he]126-jameson ’s unable to drag them away . [His]126-jameson chest is broad with a scattering of dark hair , and [his]126-jameson stomach is rippled . . . but it ’s [his]126-jameson dick that ’s a standout . [The man]265-the man ’s hung like a horse . [I]0-i do n’t know if this thing even goes down . [I]0-i most definitely have never seen it soft . “ [You]126-jameson need to get on [my]0-i bed on [your]126-jameson back now , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [my]0-i eyes drop down [his]126-jameson delicious naked body . [He]126-jameson smiles broadly . “ That ’s the best thing [you]0-i ’ve ever said to [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson drags [me]0-i through [the apartment]3531-the apartment by [my]0-i hand and into [[my]0-i bedroom]1199-my bedroom ; in one quick movement , [he]126-jameson ’s unzipped [my]0-i dress , and then [he]126-jameson slowly slides it down . [He]126-jameson holds [my]0-i hand as [I]0-i step out of it , and [his]126-jameson eyes drop hungrily down [my]0-i body . “ [You]0-i are so fucking beautiful , [Emily]91-emily . ”[126-jameson] [My]0-i heart swells at the way [he]126-jameson is looking at [me]0-i . [He]126-jameson lays [me]0-i down and spreads [my]0-i legs and slowly strokes [himself]126-jameson as [he]126-jameson stares down . [I]0-i writhe as [I]0-i wait for [his]126-jameson touch . [His]126-jameson lips take [my]0-i nipple into [his]126-jameson mouth , and [my]0-i back arches off the bed . [His]126-jameson fingers slide through the lips of [my]0-i sex . [He]126-jameson hisses in approval as [he]126-jameson feels how wet [I]0-i am . [My]0-i breath quivers on the inhale . [He]126-jameson ’s just so . . . [Jameson Miles]126-jameson knows how to touch [a woman]381-a woman . Everything is magnified , to the point where even [his]126-jameson blazing stare could make [me]0-i orgasm . [His]126-jameson lips make a delicious trail down [my]0-i body , and [he]126-jameson kisses [my]0-i inner thighs with [his]126-jameson open mouth . [My]0-i hands go to the back of [his]126-jameson head . [His]126-jameson hands hold [my]0-i legs wide open , and [his]126-jameson thick , strong tongue swipes through [me]0-i . [My]0-i back arches in pleasure as [my]0-i head tips back to the ceiling . “ Oh God . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson licks [me]0-i , slowly at first , and then as if [he]126-jameson ’s unable to control [himself]126-jameson , [he]126-jameson begins to really eat [me]0-i . [His]126-jameson stubble burns [my]0-i sex as [my]0-i body begins to ride [his]126-jameson face . “ Oh . . . so good , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whimper . [He]126-jameson lifts [my]0-i legs to sit over [his]126-jameson shoulders , and the change in position has [my]0-i body trembling with need . “ Oh God , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whimper as [my]0-i hands fist in [his]126-jameson hair . “ Come . [I]126-jameson want to taste [you]0-i , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson moans into [me]0-i . [I]0-i convulse and shudder deep inside [my]0-i body as [I]0-i cling to [him]126-jameson . [He]126-jameson laps [me]0-i up like [I]0-i ’m [his]126-jameson last supper . [He]126-jameson pulls back and unwraps a condom and passes it to [me]0-i ; [I]0-i slide it on [him]126-jameson with a soft kiss to [his]126-jameson cock . With [his]126-jameson eyes locked on [mine]0-i , [he]126-jameson lifts [my]0-i legs around [his]126-jameson waist and in one strong movement slides deep into [my]0-i sex . [We]1201-our stare at [each other]351-each other as the air is knocked from [our]1201-our lungs . “ So fucking good , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers as [our]1201-our eyes search [each other]351-each other . [He]126-jameson pulls out and then slowly slides back in . [My]0-i mouth hangs slack at the feeling of [his]126-jameson possession . [Nobody]3121-nobody fucks [me]0-i like [Jameson Miles]126-jameson . . . [nobody]3121-nobody . [I]0-i can try to deny this emotional attachment all [I]0-i want , but the physical . . . [I]0-i just ca n’t . [He]126-jameson circles deep inside and then slams back in . [I]0-i cry out as the air is knocked from [my]0-i lungs . Then [he]126-jameson ’s riding [me]0-i — deep , punishing hits — and [my]0-i bed is hitting the wall so hard it may knock it down . “ Fuck , fuck , fuck , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson moans into [my]0-i neck . [He]126-jameson lifts one of [my]0-i legs , and [I]0-i ca n’t hold it any longer . [My]0-i body contracts around [his]126-jameson , and [he]126-jameson hisses as [he]126-jameson comes with [me]0-i . [We]1206-we cling to [each other]351-each other as [we]1206-we pant , and [I]0-i smile up against [his]126-jameson cheek as euphoria runs through [my]0-i blood . [Jameson Miles]126-jameson is [my]0-i new drug . And [I]0-i am [[his]126-jameson crack whore]1208-his crack whore . [I]0-i wake to the gentle breathing beside [me]0-i , and [I]0-i roll over and smile . [Jameson]126-jameson is flat on [his]126-jameson back and asleep . [We]1206-we had an incredible night . [The tender , witty guy]1209-the tender , witty guy was back . . . with no sight of [the asshole CEO]1210-the asshole ceo . [I]0-i lean up onto [my]0-i elbow as [I]0-i watch [him]126-jameson . [His]126-jameson dark hair hangs over [his]126-jameson forehead , [his]126-jameson big red lips are slightly open , and [his]126-jameson eyelashes flutter as [he]126-jameson sleeps . [He]126-jameson has one arm behind [his]126-jameson head , and the other is splayed on [his]126-jameson stomach . [He]126-jameson ’s beautiful — everything about [him]126-jameson physically is beautiful . Last night [I]0-i got a little peek that maybe [he]126-jameson ’s as beautiful on the inside as well . Stop it . [You]1211-you ’re getting clingy and attached . [Jameson]126-jameson is not [the kind of man [you]1211-you get attached to]1212-the kind of man you get attached to . [He]126-jameson inhales deeply as [he]126-jameson wakes , and slowly [his]126-jameson eyes open and focus on [me]0-i . “ Hey , [beautiful]3681-beautiful , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers in a husky voice as [he]126-jameson cups [my]0-i face in [his]126-jameson hand . [I]0-i smile and lean over and kiss [him]126-jameson . “ Good morning , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[0-i] “ Call [me]0-i [Jay]158-jay . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown in question . “ [[My]0-i friends]651-my friends call [me]0-i [Jay]158-jay . ”[0-i] “ So [we]3683-we ’re [friends]3684-friends ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson pulls [me]0-i over [his]126-jameson body onto [his]126-jameson chest . “ No , [you]0-i ’re [[my]126-jameson fuck bunny]3685-my fuck bunny . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i kiss [his]126-jameson chest beneath [me]0-i . “ What ’s planned for today ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks . “ Nothing . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson frowns as if trying to focus [his]126-jameson eyes , and [he]126-jameson pinches the bridge of [his]126-jameson nose . “ [I]126-jameson ’ll get [[my]126-jameson driver]3686-my driver to pick [us]3687-we up , and [I]126-jameson ’ll make [us]3687-we some breakfast at [[my]126-jameson place]3652-my place . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i lean up onto [my]0-i elbow and look down at [him]126-jameson . “ What ’s wrong with [here]275-here ? [I]0-i ’ve got breakfast things [you]126-jameson can cook . ”[0-i] “ Nothing . [I]126-jameson just feel more comfortable at [[my]126-jameson place]3652-my place . [We]3687-we will hang [there]3073-there today . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]0-i ’m more comfortable [here]275-here , [Jameson]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply , slightly annoyed . “ What ? ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson winces . “ How could [you]126-jameson be ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i sit up , affronted . “ What ’s that supposed to mean ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . [He]126-jameson rolls [his]126-jameson eyes . “ Here [we]3687-we go [a - fucking - gain]3693-a - fucking - gain . ”[126-jameson] “ What ’s that supposed to mean ? ”[126-jameson] “ [You]0-i asked that question twice , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson replies dryly . “ Do [you]0-i have to argue about every fucking thing that [we]3687-we do ? ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson ’m not arguing . [I]126-jameson ’m just saying [I]126-jameson want to stay [here]275-here today . [[Your]126-jameson apartment]3695-your apartment may be fancy , but it does n’t impress [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson stares at [me]0-i for a moment . “ And for the record , [I]126-jameson do n’t argue about everything . [I]126-jameson was annoyed that [[your]126-jameson masseuse]3581-your masseuse is on personal terms to message [you]126-jameson the way [she]3581-your masseuse did . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson rolls [his]126-jameson eyes and puts the back of [his]126-jameson forearm over them . “ Here [we]3697-we go . ”[126-jameson] “ Will [you]126-jameson stop saying that ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap as [I]0-i get out of bed and put on [my]0-i robe . “ [I]0-i was just lying here thinking how gorgeous [you]126-jameson are , and then [you]126-jameson go and open [your]126-jameson big mouth and ruin the whole thing . ”[0-i] “ [I]126-jameson ’m thinking the same thing , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson snaps as [he]126-jameson gets out of bed . “ And stop going on about [Chloe]151-chloe — it ’s not a relationship . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i stop still . What the hell does [he]126-jameson mean by that ? “ What do [you]126-jameson mean , it ’s not a relationship ? Do [you]126-jameson and [she]151-chloe have sex ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson bends and picks up [his]126-jameson jeans , ignoring [me]0-i . “ [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i put [my]0-i hands on [my]0-i hips as [I]0-i watch [him]126-jameson . [He]126-jameson pulls [his]126-jameson jeans on and zips them up . “ Sometimes . ”[126-jameson] “ [You]126-jameson have sex with [her]151-chloe ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i gasp . “ [I]0-i have a standing appointment on Tuesdays and Thursdays . [She]151-chloe does n’t come for sex , but sometimes it just happens . [She]151-chloe ’s touching [me]0-i , [I]0-i ’m oiled up . . . it just happens . ”[0-i] [My]0-i mouth falls open . “ Did [you]126-jameson have sex with [her]151-chloe this last week ? Since [you]126-jameson ’ve been with [me]126-jameson ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson rolls [his]126-jameson eyes . “ Stop rolling [your]126-jameson fucking eyes at [me]0-i , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ No . [I]0-i did n’t have sex with [her]151-chloe this week . ”[0-i] “ Did [you]126-jameson have [your]126-jameson regular two massages ? ”[126-jameson] “ Yes . ”[126-jameson] “ So [you]126-jameson had [someone else]1023-someone else ’s hands all over [your]126-jameson body ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i fume . “ Like [you]126-jameson did last night on [the dance floor]1115-the dance floor . Stop looking for a fucking fight , [Emily]91-emily . [You]126-jameson are pissing [me]0-i off . ”[0-i] “ Well , [you]126-jameson ’re pissing [me]126-jameson off . Get out . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson ’m already fucking leaving , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson barks . “ Go and have a massage today , [you]126-jameson big sleazebag . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson shakes [his]126-jameson head in disgust . “ [You]0-i know what ? [You]0-i ’re perfect for this fake news job . This drama thing is right up [your]0-i alley . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson throws [his]126-jameson shirt over [his]126-jameson head and then sits on the bed to put [his]126-jameson shoes on . Rage fills [me]0-i , and [I]0-i pick up one of [his]126-jameson shoes and throw it to the other side of [the room]613-the room . “ So tough , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson huffs . [I]0-i narrow [my]0-i eyes as fury boils in [my]0-i blood . “ Yeah , like [your]126-jameson [Chloe]151-chloe ’s vagina . How many [clients]3700-clients does [she]151-chloe fuck each week ? ”[126-jameson] “ [She]151-chloe is n’t [[my]1214-my Chloe]3701-my chloe . ”[1214-my] “ [You]0-i know what ? Make [her]151-chloe [[your]126-jameson Chloe]3702-your chloe , because [I]1214-my have no intention of taking [her]151-chloe sloppy seconds . ”[1214-my] “ What ’s that supposed to mean ? ”[126-jameson] “ It means that [you]126-jameson sleep with [me]1214-my and only [me]1214-my , or [you]126-jameson get out of [my]1214-my life . ”[1214-my] [He]1214-my puts [his]1214-my hands on [his]1214-my hips in outrage . “ [I]1214-my ’m not looking for a relationship . ”[1214-my] “ Good . There ’s [my]126-jameson answer . Get out . ”[126-jameson] “ [You]0-i know what ? This little Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde thing [you]126-jameson ’ve got going on [here]275-here is a real turnoff . ”[1214-my] “ And [your]1214-my overshared dick is n’t ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i shriek . “ [You]126-jameson ’re an insult to [my]0-i intelligence , [Jameson]126-jameson . Go [home]3076-home to [[your]126-jameson fancy apartment]3705-your fancy apartment in [[your]126-jameson fancy car]3706-your fancy car and have sex with whoever [you]126-jameson want . ”[0-i] [I]0-i wrap [my]0-i robe around [me]0-i in disgust . “ [I]0-i ’m too good for [you]1215-he anyway . ”[0-i] [He]1215-he glares at [me]0-i . “ Why are [you]0-i such [a fucking bitch]3707-a fucking bitch ? ”[1215-he] “ Because [you]1215-he ’re [a self - centered asshole]3708-a self - centered asshole . Get the hell out ! ”[0-i] [I]0-i scream . [I]0-i pick up a pillow and throw it at [him]1215-he . [He]1215-he brushes past [me]0-i in a rush . “ [Nobody]3121-nobody treats [me]1215-he as bad as [you]0-i do , [Emily]91-emily ! ”[1215-he] [he]1215-he yells as [he]1215-he storms toward the door . “ Because [you]1215-he pay [them]3121-nobody ! ”[1215-he] [I]0-i screech . “ Good thing [you]1215-he ’ve got lots of money , [Jameson]126-jameson . [You]1215-he ’re going to need it . [Nobody]3121-nobody would put up with [your]1215-he shit for free . ”[0-i] [He]1215-he turns and glares at [me]0-i . “ That ’s a low blow . ”[1215-he] [I]0-i fake a smile . “ Have a nice life , [asshole]3711-asshole . ”[0-i] [I]0-i turn and walk into [[my]0-i bathroom]1216-my bathroom and lock the door . Screw [him]1215-he . Chapter 11 [I]0-i turn the spoon upside down , put it into [my]0-i mouth , and suck the Nutella from it as [I]0-i stare at the television . It ’s four in the afternoon , [I]0-i ’m still in [my]0-i pajamas , and [I]0-i ’ve had a shitty day . After [I]0-i woke up in a dream lying next to [the most gorgeous man on [the planet]1218-the planet]1217-the most gorgeous man on the planet , [Jameson Miles]126-jameson [the asshole CEO]1210-the asshole ceo decided to make an appearance and ruined everything . To be honest , [I]0-i ’m regretting not going to [[his]1215-he place]3354-his place for breakfast , but then , on the other hand , [I]0-i ’m glad [I]0-i did n’t because [I]0-i would n’t have found out about [Chloe]151-chloe , [[his]1215-he masseuse]1221-his masseuse . [They]1222-they fuck . [I]0-i hate that it bothers [me]0-i . [I]0-i hate that [I]0-i can feel [myself]0-i getting attached to [him]1215-he when [he]1215-he clearly is n’t feeling the same . [I]0-i dig into [my]0-i jar of Nutella again . The smooth chocolate melts on [my]0-i tongue , offering a momentary distraction . [I]0-i stare at the television in a daze , a horror movie . [My]0-i favorite rom - com category is scratched from the viewing repertoire . [My]0-i mind goes back to the first time [I]0-i met [Jameson]126-jameson , when [he]126-jameson told [me]0-i that [he]126-jameson did n’t believe rom - coms were true . Maybe [he]126-jameson was on to something ? Maybe [I]0-i ’m just [a romantic fool]1223-a romantic fool ? Does [he]126-jameson have feelings for [Chloe]151-chloe ? Who cares ? [He]126-jameson ’s [an asshole]785-an asshole . [I]0-i need to cut this out . Stop thinking about [him]126-jameson . [He]126-jameson ’s [a self - absorbed player who sleeps with whoever [he]126-jameson wants , whenever [he]126-jameson wants]1225-a self - absorbed player who sleeps with whoever he wants , whenever he wants . [I]0-i look around [[my]0-i shitty apartment]1226-my shitty apartment , and sadness fills [me]0-i . If [he]126-jameson liked [me]0-i , it would n’t matter where [we]1227-we were — [he]126-jameson would want to spend time with [me]0-i regardless . But [he]126-jameson could n’t get out of [here]275-here quick enough . [My]0-i mind goes over [our]1227-we fight this morning . “ [Nobody]3121-nobody treats [me]0-i as bad as [you]0-i do , [Emily]91-emily . ”[0-i] “ Because [you]0-i pay [them]3121-nobody . Good thing [you]0-i ’ve got lots of money , [Jameson]126-jameson . [You]0-i ’re going to need it . [Nobody]3121-nobody would put up with [your]0-i shit for free . ”[0-i] “ That ’s a low blow . ”[0-i] Did [I]0-i go too far ? Was it a low blow ? Probably , but what does [he]126-jameson expect ? And [I]0-i ca n’t believe that [nobody]3121-nobody treats [him]126-jameson as badly as [I]0-i do . If [he]126-jameson treats [other women]1230-other women the way [he]126-jameson treats [me]0-i , surely [they]1230-other women would n’t put up with it ? [Nobody]3121-nobody is that stupid . . . are [they]3121-nobody ? “ [I]3121-nobody ’m not looking for a relationship . ”[3121-nobody] [I]0-i punch the pillow on [my]0-i lap in disgust . Six words have never made [me]0-i feel so cheap . Monday morning , [I]0-i ride in [the elevator]428-the elevator to [the top floor]467-the top floor . [We]1234-we scheduled this meeting last week so that [I]0-i could meet [the private investigator]1235-the private investigator , but it ’s the last thing [I]0-i want to do now . [I]0-i want to forget [Jameson Miles]126-jameson , forget [I]0-i ever met [beautiful Jim]90-jim . . . or [Jay]158-jay , or whatever the heck [I]0-i ’m supposed to call [him]1235-the private investigator . [I]0-i ’ve come to the realization that [they]1236-they ’re a package deal , and unfortunately , [I]0-i ca n’t have [Jim]90-jim without [Jameson]126-jameson , even though it ’s only [Jim]90-jim [I]0-i want . So [I]0-i ’m doing what ’s best for [me]0-i . [I]0-i ’m cutting ties ; [I]0-i ’m not falling into the pattern of sleeping with [Jameson]126-jameson without strings in the hope that [I]0-i get a glimpse of [Jim]90-jim every now and then . It would be easy . . . too easy . But [I]0-i already know [my]0-i poor heart could n’t take it . [I]0-i ’m not wired for casual sex . It ’s just not who [I]0-i am . [I]0-i ’m going to be professional and try to concentrate on [my]0-i job . If [I]0-i did n’t have to see [him]126-jameson , it would be so much easier , but it is what it is . [I]0-i need to learn to deal with it . [He]126-jameson ’s not going anywhere , and [I]0-i really want this job . Damn it , [Emily]91-emily , why do [you]1237-you always take the hard way ? Why do [you]1237-you always fall for [the wrong guy]1238-the wrong guy ? [The last man]1239-the last man had no motivation , and [this man]327-this man has too much . [Both men]1241-both men did n’t care enough to go the extra mile for [me]0-i . Maybe [my]0-i expectations are too high from [[my]0-i book boyfriends]1242-my book boyfriends in [my]0-i romance novels — maybe [Jameson]126-jameson was right on that one . But damn it , [I]0-i want the fucking fairy tale for once . The elevator door opens , and [I]0-i walk out and through reception . “ Good morning , [Emily]91-emily , ”[0-i] [Sammia]116-sammia says . “ Morning . ”[116-sammia] [I]0-i smile . “ Just go through to [[his]126-jameson office]496-his office . ”[0-i] “ Thanks . ”[0-i] [I]0-i walk down [the corridor]728-the corridor and knock on [his]126-jameson door . “ Come in , ”[126-jameson] [his]126-jameson deep voice calls . [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes and brace [myself]0-i . [I]0-i drop [my]0-i shoulders and open the door . [I]0-i stop on the spot . Shit . [The room]613-the room is full of [men]426-men . “ Come in , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson says , devoid of emotion . “ Take a seat . ”[126-jameson] “ Thanks . ”[0-i] [I]0-i drop nervously into the seat near the end of the large rectangular table . [Jameson]126-jameson sits at the head , and [Tristan]135-tristan , [Elliot]155-elliot , [Christopher]156-christopher , and [an older man]1246-an older man are on [Jameson]126-jameson ’s left . Then there are [another six men [I]0-i have never seen before]1247-another six men i have never seen before . [Jameson]126-jameson ’s eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ This is [Emily Foster]91-emily , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson introduces [me]0-i . “ Hello , ”[434-the men] [the men]434-the men all say . [I]0-i smile awkwardly as [I]0-i look around the table . “ [Emily]91-emily , this is [[my]126-jameson father]3715-my father , [George]121-george . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson gestures to [the older man]1249-the older man . “ Hello , ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i whisper nervously . “ Hello , [dear]3154-dear . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson smiles warmly ; [he]126-jameson ’s in [his]126-jameson sixties and looks like an older version of [Jameson]126-jameson and [Elliot]155-elliot . Gorgeous and distinguished with those piercing blue eyes . “ This is [Martin]166-martin and [Gerrard]167-gerrard , [Max]168-max and [Barry]169-barry , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson says as [he]126-jameson points around the table . “ And on the end are [Calvin]170-calvin and [Jake]158-jay . ”[126-jameson] “ Hello . ”[0-i] [I]0-i force a smile . [I]0-i ’ll never remember all these names . “ This is [the corporate investigation team]3717-the corporate investigation team , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson continues . “ [Jake]158-jay will be [the eyes on the floor]3718-the eyes on the floor , and [the other five men]3719-the other five men will be assessing the data that ’s collected . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i watch [him]126-jameson as [he]126-jameson talks , devoid of emotion , and [my]0-i heart cracks a little . [He]126-jameson ’s completely unrattled by [me]0-i . . . by [us]1250-us . There is no [us]1250-us . “ Okay . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i look around at [the team]1251-the team . “ Nice to meet [you]1251-the team all . ”[0-i] “ [We]1250-us are going to hit the ground running this morning , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson continues . “ [Emily]91-emily , [you]91-emily are going to show [Jake]158-jay around , and then [you]91-emily will be reporting directly to [Tristan]135-tristan in regards to the stories [you]91-emily are putting forward . ”[126-jameson] [My]0-i heart drops , and [I]0-i nod . [My]0-i eyes go to [Tristan]135-tristan , and [he]135-tristan smiles warmly . [He]135-tristan knows why [I]0-i ’ve been designated to [him]135-tristan . [I]0-i feel like throwing [myself]0-i on the floor and having a crying tantrum . “ Thank [you]135-tristan . That ’s great , ”[0-i] [I]0-i lie . For the next fifteen minutes , [I]0-i sit in [my]0-i chair and stare at [the CEO]3206-the ceo as [he]3206-the ceo runs through the day ’s events with a controlled detachment . [He]3206-the ceo ’s assertive , hard , and fiercely intelligent , and [the room]613-the room hangs on to [his]3206-the ceo every word . And [he]3206-the ceo fucks [his]3206-the ceo masseuse on Tuesdays and Thursdays . [I]0-i do n’t know how [I]0-i got [myself]0-i into this messed - up situation , but it has to end . Well . . . it ’s already ended , so [I]0-i do n’t need to bother anyway . “ Thank [you]1254-the men from the investigation company ; that wraps it up . [I]3206-the ceo would like a report on [my]3206-the ceo desk at four thirty every afternoon , ”[3206-the ceo] [he]3206-the ceo tells [the men from [the investigation company]1255-the investigation company]1254-the men from the investigation company . “ Yes , [sir]3064-sir , ”[1254-the men from the investigation company] [they]1254-the men from the investigation company reply as [everyone]3098-everyone stands . [I]0-i wait at the back , unsure whether to leave or not . “ [Emily]91-emily , just a minute , please , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson asks . [My]0-i heart flips . “ Yes . ”[126-jameson] “ Can [you]1254-the men from the investigation company take [Jake]158-jay down to [[your]1254-the men from the investigation company floor]3721-your floor under the guise that [he]158-jay ’s new and that [[you]1254-the men from the investigation company two]3244-you two are going through a training program together ? ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes search [his]3206-the ceo . [He]3206-the ceo stares at [me]0-i blankly , cold as ice . “ Sure . ”[3206-the ceo] [I]0-i turn to [Jake]158-jay and smile . “ Are [you]158-jay ready now ? ”[0-i] “ Show [me]158-jay the way , ”[158-jay] [Jake]158-jay says playfully . “ After [you]0-i . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i turn and walk out of [the office]444-the office with [my]0-i heart dripping into [my]0-i high - heeled pumps . Well , that ’s the end of that . [He]3206-the ceo ’s done . [I]0-i wish [I]0-i were . [I]0-i ’ll get [there]3073-there — [I]0-i always do . [I]0-i sit in the café at the bench seat by the window and stare at [the limo waiting outside [Miles Media]12-miles media from across [the street]654-the street]1259-the limo waiting outside miles media from across the street . It ’s been a long week , and today was especially flat . It ’s Thursday , massage day . [I]0-i get a vision of [Jameson]126-jameson oiled up on the table and [another woman]1261-another woman roaming [her]1261-another woman hands over [his]3206-the ceo body ; [my]0-i stomach clenches as [I]0-i picture it so clearly . [My]0-i mind ’s playing evil games with [me]0-i and showing [me]0-i the worst reality - porn scenario in history . [Jim]90-jim . . . being touched by [another woman]1261-another woman . Is [she]1261-another woman dressed while [she]1261-another woman massages [him]3206-the ceo ? Do [they]1263-they talk ? Do [they]1263-they laugh like [we]1264-we do ? [I]0-i need to stop this ; it ’s so destructive . [I]0-i want [a man who does n’t even exist]1265-a man who does n’t even exist . [The driver]635-the driver opens the front door of [the building]412-the building , and [I]0-i watch in slow motion as [Jameson Miles]126-jameson walks out , navy suit , perfect posture , dark hair . . . emanating power . [Everyone]3098-everyone stops what [they]3098-everyone are doing and watches [him]3206-the ceo get into the back of [the limo]811-the limo . [[His]3206-the ceo driver]892-his driver shuts the door , and [it]1271-it slowly pulls out and disappears down [the street]654-the street . [I]0-i stare back at [my]0-i ham - and - cheese toasted sandwich in front of [me]0-i , [my]0-i dinner . Deflation fills [me]0-i . [I]0-i just lost [my]0-i appetite . It ’s three o’clock on Friday , and [I]0-i stare at the bogus story in front of [me]0-i . Ha . . . what a joke . [I]0-i moved all the way to [New York]3-new york to make up fake news for [a twat]1273-a twat and [[his]1273-a twat twat media company]1274-his twat media company . . . and [[his]1273-a twat twat brothers]1275-his twat brothers . [I]0-i hit the keys on [my]0-i computer with force . [Twat]171-twat , twat . . . fucking twat . So much for [my]0-i years of university study . [[My]0-i parents]1276-my parents must be so proud . When [they]1276-my parents offered [me]0-i the chance to do this , [I]0-i thought it was going to be exciting and a chance to prove [my]0-i worth . Maybe not ? “ Down the end , ”[401-someone] [I]0-i hear [someone]401-someone say . [I]0-i glance up to see [a man with a big brown paper bag]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag . “ Uber Eats for [Emily Foster]91-emily . ”[401-someone] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i look around , embarrassed . “ [I]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag did n’t order anything . ”[1278-a man with a big brown paper bag] [He]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag reads the docket . “ It says here that . . . ”[1278-a man with a big brown paper bag] [He]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag pauses as [he]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag reads and frowns as if confused . “ It says here that this Uber Eats delivery is quality controlled and safe for human consumption . ”[1278-a man with a big brown paper bag] [I]0-i stare at [him]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag and take the bag from [his]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag hands . [He]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag squints as [he]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag continues to read the docket . “ This does n’t make sense . . . ”[1278-a man with a big brown paper bag] “ What does n’t ? ”[1278-a man with a big brown paper bag] “ Sugar to sweeten [you]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag up . ”[0-i] [I]0-i open the bag to find a huge passion fruit cheesecake in its entirety , and [I]0-i look up at the camera and smirk . Is [he]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag kidding ? “ Who sent this ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ It says here , [the sender]3723-the sender is [a Mr. Nice Guy]3724-a mr. nice guy . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stare at [him]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag deadpan . “ [Mr. Nice Guy]172-mr. nice guy ? ”[0-i] “ Yeah , weird , huh ? ”[1278-a man with a big brown paper bag] “ Thank [you]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag . ”[0-i] [I]0-i try [my]0-i hardest not to smile . [I]0-i know [he]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag ’s watching . [Molly]111-molly and [Aaron]110-aaron peer into the bag . “ Score , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron screeches . “ [I]110-aaron ’ll get the plates . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron takes off to [[our]1279-our staff kitchen]1280-our staff kitchen . “ Thank God for cheesecake , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly sings in excitement . Okay . . . [he]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag ’s made the first move . What do [I]0-i do ? [I]0-i take out [my]0-i phone and text [him]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag . [Dear Mr. Nice Guy]1281-dear mr. nice guy Thank [you]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag . Although , [I]0-i should have [you]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag know [I]0-i ’m already sweet enough . [I]0-i hit send and wait . A reply bounces back . [I]0-i have no doubt . Can [I]0-i take [you]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag out to dinner tonight ? [I]0-i sit back in [my]0-i chair , surprised by [his]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag request . This is a no - win situation . [He]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag wants [a fuck buddy]1282-a fuck buddy to join [[his]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag harem]1283-his harem , and [I]0-i want [him]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag all to [myself]0-i . [I]0-i write back . [I]0-i think [we]1284-we both said all [we]1284-we needed to on Sunday morning . God . . . why ca n’t [he]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag just be normal ? A reply bounces back . [I]0-i have a proposal for [you]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag . [I]0-i stare at the message but do n’t reply . A proposal ? What , does [he]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag want [me]0-i to be [[his]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag new masseuse]1285-his new masseuse ? [I]0-i feel [my]0-i anger bubble at the mere thought of [her]1285-his new masseuse . Ten minutes later , another text comes in . Hear [me]0-i out , please . Please . [He]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag said please . Ugh , okay . [I]0-i reply . Fine . [I]0-i wait . [I]0-i ’ll pick [you]1278-a man with a big brown paper bag up at seven . “ Here [you]111-molly go , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron says as [he]110-aaron passes [me]0-i a plate with the biggest slice of cheesecake [I]0-i ’ve ever seen . [He]110-aaron passes [Molly]111-molly [hers]111-molly and then takes a seat with [his]110-aaron . “ This is fucking delicious , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly mumbles with [her]111-molly mouth full . [Aaron]110-aaron moans in appreciation . “ Oh [my]110-aaron fuck , foodgasm . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i take a bite as [I]0-i concentrate hard on not smiling too hard — just in case [he]110-aaron ’s watching . Well played , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles . . . well played . Sometimes [you]1286-you just know in [your]1286-you gut that [you]1286-you should n’t be doing something . The outcome is already written in the stars , and sometimes [you]1286-you should just be stronger and say no . But what if [you]1286-you ca n’t ? [I]0-i ca n’t physically bring [myself]0-i not to go tonight . [The masochist in [me]0-i]1287-the masochist in me wants to see [him]110-aaron . [The same masochist]1288-the same masochist wants [him]110-aaron to take [me]0-i and throw [me]0-i onto [his]110-aaron fancy bed and fuck [me]0-i till [I]0-i forget [my]0-i own name . It ’s been a long and lonely week . But [I]0-i have to stay strong tonight . If [I]0-i cave in now , the last week has been for nothing . And [I]0-i still stand by what [I]0-i said on Sunday . [I]0-i am too good for [him]110-aaron with the way [he]110-aaron is at the moment , and [I]0-i wo n’t share , and money means nothing to [me]0-i at all . [He]110-aaron needs to step up or step away . The security buzzer sounds , and [my]0-i stomach dances in excitement . “ Hello . ”[110-aaron] “ [Uber Eats]173-uber eats . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i hear [his]110-aaron velvety voice . [I]0-i smile broadly . “ What have [you]110-aaron got for [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] “ Italian sausage . ”[110-aaron] “ Hmm , ”[0-i] [I]0-i tease . “ Are [you]110-aaron going to drug [my]0-i sausage and take advantage of [my]0-i body after [I]0-i fall unconscious ? ”[0-i] “ Undoubtedly . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile and push the button to let [him]110-aaron up , and then [I]0-i begin to pace as [I]0-i wave [my]0-i arms around in the air . Play it cool . . . play it cool . . . play it cool . Knock , knock . [I]0-i open the door in a rush , and there [he]110-aaron stands , gray shirt and black jeans . . . blazing blue eyes . A slow , sexy smile crosses [his]110-aaron face . “ Hello . ”[110-aaron] “ Hi , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i stare at the beautiful specimen in front of [me]0-i . [I]0-i just want to throw [myself]0-i at [him]110-aaron , the pull to [him]110-aaron unbearable . [He]110-aaron leans down and kisses [my]0-i cheek as [he]110-aaron walks past [me]0-i into [[my]0-i apartment]940-my apartment . “ Are [you]0-i ready ? ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron asks . “ Uh - huh . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i grab [my]0-i purse and wrap . [His]110-aaron eyes drop down [my]0-i body in [my]0-i black dress . “ [You]0-i look lovely . ”[110-aaron] “ Thanks , ”[0-i] [I]0-i breathe . “ Let ’s go . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron holds [his]110-aaron arm out , and [I]0-i link [mine]0-i with [his]110-aaron . [We]1290-we take [the elevator]428-the elevator in awkward silence . [He]110-aaron is pensive , and [I]0-i ’m just nervous as all hell . Playing cool , calm , and collected is terrifying , and [I]0-i remind [myself]0-i not to drink too much tonight . [We]1290-we walk out the front of [the building]412-the building , and [the limo]811-the limo is parked at the curb . [He]110-aaron opens the door , and [I]0-i climb in . Memories of the first time [I]0-i was in this back seat accost [me]0-i , and the phrase dirty ho rolls around in [my]0-i head . [I]0-i slide in , and [he]110-aaron gets in beside [me]0-i , and then [he]110-aaron picks up [my]0-i hand and takes it in [his]110-aaron and rests them on [his]110-aaron lap . Okay . . . [he]110-aaron ’s touchy . What does that mean ? [I]0-i do n’t know what to say or where this sits in [my]0-i playing - hard - to - get act , but the warmth of [his]110-aaron touch is so comforting that [I]0-i let [him]110-aaron . [The limo]811-the limo drives through [the city]3381-the city , and [I]0-i stare out the window as a million thoughts run through [my]0-i head . Tonight is important ; [we]1296-we either have to come to some sort of understanding or cut [our]1296-we losses . [We]1296-we ca n’t keep fighting over nothing like [we]1296-we do . [The car]422-the car comes to a stop , and [the driver]635-the driver opens the door . [I]0-i climb out , and [Jameson]126-jameson takes [my]0-i hand and leads [me]0-i into [a fancy restaurant]1299-a fancy restaurant , [Lucino ’s]32-lucino ’s . “ Booking for Miles , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says as [he]126-jameson holds [my]0-i hand tightly in [his]126-jameson . “ This way , [sir]3064-sir . ”[126-jameson] [The waiter]867-the waiter smiles as [he]867-the waiter leads [us]1296-we through [the restaurant]3510-the restaurant to a cozy little table in the corner . [He]867-the waiter pulls out [my]0-i chair , and [I]0-i take a seat . [Jameson]126-jameson sits opposite [me]0-i ; [the restaurant]3510-the restaurant is dark , with candles flickering on the tables and fairy lights hanging from the ceiling . It ’s very romantic . Do n’t get excited . It ’s probably just a coincidence . “ Can [I]867-the waiter get [you]0-i something to drink ? ”[867-the waiter] [the waiter]867-the waiter asks . “ Yes , [we]1296-we ’ll have a bottle of S Salon please . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson closes the menu and hands it over . [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson . Here [we]1296-we go again . [The waiter]867-the waiter disappears , and [Jameson]126-jameson ’s big blue eyes come to [mine]0-i . [He]126-jameson takes [my]0-i hand over the table again . “ Hello . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles softly , as if finally relaxing . Drop arguing about the drinks . It does n’t fucking matter who orders the drinks . “ Hi . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . [He]126-jameson dusts [his]126-jameson thumb over the back of [my]0-i knuckles as [his]126-jameson eyes search [mine]0-i . “ How are [you]0-i ? ”[126-jameson] “ Good . ”[126-jameson] Oh , [his]126-jameson touch makes [me]0-i weak . [I]0-i just want to blurt out that [I]0-i ’m lying and that [I]0-i ’ve had a shit week and [he]126-jameson ’s [the king of [Twatsville]33-twatsville]1305-the king of twatsville . [We]1306-we stare at [each other]351-each other across the table . It ’s as if [both of [us]1306-we]1308-both of us do n’t want to speak in case [we]1306-we break out into all - out war . “ What ’s this proposal , [Jameson]126-jameson ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson sits back , seemingly annoyed at [my]0-i tone . [I]0-i grip [his]126-jameson hand . “ And [I]0-i ’m not giving [you]126-jameson attitude . [I]0-i just want to know what [you]126-jameson ’re thinking , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say softly . “ Stop being on the defensive with [me]0-i . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson relaxes a little , and [the waiter]867-the waiter returns with the bottle of champagne and opens it . [He]867-the waiter pours a little into the champagne flute , and [Jameson]126-jameson tastes it . “ That ’s fine . ”[867-the waiter] [The waiter]867-the waiter then fills [our]1306-we glasses and leaves [us]1306-we alone . “ [I]867-the waiter ’ve been thinking about what [you]126-jameson said last weekend . ”[867-the waiter] “ And ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson sips [his]126-jameson drink . “ [I]126-jameson canceled [my]126-jameson massages this week . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smirk as [my]0-i eyes hold [his]126-jameson ; [I]0-i stay silent . “ The thing is with [me]0-i . . . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson voice trails off . [I]0-i wait for [him]126-jameson to speak , and when [he]126-jameson does n’t , [I]0-i squeeze [his]126-jameson hand in [mine]0-i for reassurance . “ [I]0-i ’m married to [my]0-i job , [Em]91-emily . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ When [I]0-i said [I]0-i was n’t looking for a relationship , [I]0-i did n’t mean . . . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson shrugs as if lost for words . “ [You]126-jameson did n’t mean what ? ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson did n’t mean that [I]126-jameson do n’t want to see [you]126-jameson . [I]126-jameson meant that [I]126-jameson am [a workaholic]3726-a workaholic , and [I]126-jameson know that [very few women]3727-very few women can deal with how much [I]126-jameson work . ”[126-jameson] “ [Jameson]126-jameson , [I]126-jameson do n’t care about how hard [you]126-jameson work . [I]126-jameson just do n’t want to be one of many . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson frowns . “ Meaning what ? ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson ’m not wired for one - night stands , [Jameson]126-jameson . It ’s not who [I]126-jameson am . But [I]126-jameson ’m not looking for a deep and meaningful relationship either . [You]126-jameson ’ve misunderstood [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] “ What do [you]126-jameson want , then ? ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson want to have a friendship with [a man]3093-a man and know [I]126-jameson ’m [the only person [he]3093-a man ’s sleeping with]3729-the only person he ’s sleeping with . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson listens . “ And [I]126-jameson most definitely do n’t want to share [you]126-jameson with [a fucking masseuse]3730-a fucking masseuse . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson rolls [his]126-jameson eyes . “ And [I]126-jameson do n’t want [you]126-jameson to roll [your]126-jameson fucking eyes at [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson clenches [his]126-jameson jaw , unimpressed . “ Watch [your]126-jameson tone , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson warns . “ See that ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i say . “ What ? ”[0-i] “ This defensive shit . It has to stop between [us]3731-we . [We]3731-we ca n’t keep fighting over every little thing like [we]3731-we do . ”[126-jameson] “ [You]0-i ’re just as bad , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson fires back . “ [I]126-jameson know , and [I]126-jameson ’m trying to stop it . Just now [I]126-jameson held [my]126-jameson tongue because [you]0-i ordered [my]126-jameson drink without asking what [I]126-jameson wanted . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson ’m used to being in control , [Emily]91-emily , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson snaps . “ So am [I.]126-jameson That wo n’t change . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson eyes search [mine]0-i , and [he]126-jameson rearranges the napkin on [his]126-jameson lap as if [he]126-jameson ’s thinking . “ [I]0-i ’m not asking [you]126-jameson to be [[my]0-i boyfriend]3355-my boyfriend , [Jameson]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ That ’s not what this is about . [We]3733-we have a great sexual connection , and [I]0-i want it . [I]0-i feel like [I]0-i have to have it . . . but [I]0-i ca n’t , not if [I]0-i know [you]126-jameson have it with [other women]1230-other women . [I]0-i need to be [the only one]3735-the only one . ”[0-i] “ Fine , [I]126-jameson wo n’t sleep with [anyone else]632-anyone else , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson snaps in exasperation . “ And ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . [He]126-jameson rolls [his]126-jameson eyes . “ And [you]0-i can order the fucking drinks . ”[126-jameson] Chapter 12 [I]0-i giggle . “ This is n’t about the stupid drinks , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[0-i] “ What is it about , then , for Christ ’s sake ? Speak English . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson want [you]126-jameson to drop being defensive with [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]0-i ’m not . ”[0-i] “ Yes , [you]126-jameson are , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i hold [his]126-jameson hand in [mine]0-i . “ So are [you]126-jameson . ”[0-i] “ [I]126-jameson know [I]126-jameson am , because [I]126-jameson feel like [you]126-jameson will walk all over [me]126-jameson if [I]126-jameson ’m not . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson brow furrows . “ [I]126-jameson would never walk all over [you]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] “ Not purposely . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson clenches [his]126-jameson jaw , and [I]0-i know that ’s exactly how it is . “ [I]126-jameson just want [the guy [I]126-jameson met on [the plane]291-the plane]3737-the guy i met on the plane . [The one who let [himself]3737-the guy i met on the plane go]3739-the one who let himself go . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ [I]126-jameson do n’t know how to be [that guy]3740-that guy all the time , [Em]91-emily . It ’s a very small part of [my]126-jameson personality . ”[126-jameson] “ Then just save that small part for [me]0-i , ”[0-i] [I]0-i breathe . A soft smile crosses [his]126-jameson face as [he]126-jameson watches [me]0-i , and [he]126-jameson sips [his]126-jameson drink . “ What was so good about [that guy on [the plane]291-the plane]3741-that guy on the plane , anyway ? ”[126-jameson] “ [He]3741-that guy on the plane made [me]0-i laugh . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i remember . “ And [he]3741-that guy on the plane gave [me]0-i the best sex of [my]0-i life . ”[0-i] “ Of [your]126-jameson entire life ? ”[126-jameson] “ Uh - huh . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles , pleased with [himself]126-jameson . “ So do [we]3743-we have a deal ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i ask . “ Let [me]0-i get this straight — [you]126-jameson want to have [friends with benefits]3744-friends with benefits but only with [each other]351-each other ? ”[0-i] “ Yes . ”[126-jameson] “ What happens when [I]126-jameson ’m at work all the time or away and [you]126-jameson ’re out and . . . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson voice trails off . “ Then [I]126-jameson ’ll call [you]126-jameson and tell [you]126-jameson [I]126-jameson need [you]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ And [you]126-jameson ’ll talk [me]126-jameson through it over the phone , or [I]126-jameson ’ll wait till [you]126-jameson come [home]3076-home . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson rubs [his]126-jameson thumbnail over [his]126-jameson bottom lip as [he]126-jameson listens , as if fascinated . “ [I]126-jameson do n’t want to have sex with [anyone else]632-anyone else , [Jameson]126-jameson . [I]126-jameson ’m [not that kind of girl]355-not that kind of girl . [You]126-jameson are the only one - night stand [I]126-jameson ’ve ever had . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson squeezes [my]0-i hand , pleased with that answer . “ [I]126-jameson ’ve had sex with [four people]3749-four people in [my]126-jameson whole life , and [you]126-jameson ’re one of [them]3749-four people . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson leans onto [his]126-jameson hand and smiles dreamily at [me]0-i . “ What ? ”[126-jameson] “ Do [you]126-jameson know how often [I]0-i think about fucking [you]126-jameson ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i giggle , surprised by that statement . “ How often ? ”[0-i] “ All the time . [I]126-jameson ’m like [a starstruck eighteen - year - old]3750-a starstruck eighteen - year - old . ”[126-jameson] “ [You]126-jameson would n’t know it . ”[126-jameson] “ Why ? ”[0-i] “ [You]126-jameson acted like [you]126-jameson hated [me]126-jameson all week . [You]126-jameson can be so cold when [you]126-jameson want to be . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson sits up in [his]126-jameson chair and straightens [his]126-jameson back . “ [I]126-jameson do n’t like to be challenged for the sake of it , [Emily]91-emily . [You]126-jameson fought with [me]126-jameson last weekend just to prove a point . It angered [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] “ No . [I]1311-his fought with [you]126-jameson last weekend because [I]1311-his wanted to spend the day at [[my]1311-his apartment]940-my apartment , and [you]126-jameson just assumed that [[your]126-jameson place]3752-your place was better than [mine]1311-his . [Your]126-jameson money does n’t impress [me]1311-his , [Jameson]126-jameson . [I]1311-his do n’t care for [[your]126-jameson fancy apartment]3705-your fancy apartment . [Mine]1311-his is just as good . ”[1311-his] [He]1311-his rolls [his]1311-his eyes . “ Are [we]3754-we going to fight now about why [we]3754-we fought ? ”[1311-his] [I]0-i smile . [He]1311-his ’s right ; this is ridiculous . “ No . No more fighting . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pick up [his]1311-his hand and cup it around [my]0-i face . “ [We]3754-we ’re going to have dinner , and then [we]3754-we ’re going to go back to [[your]1311-his place]3752-your place , and then [I]0-i ’m going to ride [your]1311-his cock . . . just the way [you]1311-his like it , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [He]1311-his inhales sharply as [his]1311-his eyes flicker with excitement . “ [You]0-i fucking turn [me]1311-his on . ”[1311-his] [I]0-i put [my]0-i thumb into [my]0-i mouth and suck it in slow motion , [our]1312-our eyes locked . “ As [[your]1311-his dedicated fuck bunny]3756-your dedicated fuck bunny , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles , [I]0-i take [my]0-i job very seriously , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper darkly . “ [Your]1311-his wish is [my]0-i command , [sir]3064-sir . ”[0-i] [He]1311-his gives [me]0-i a slow , sexy smile . “ Now [you]0-i ’re talking . ”[1311-his] Two hours later Lathered with a sheen of perspiration , [I]0-i rock forward onto [his]1311-his cock . [Jameson]126-jameson is sitting with [his]1311-his back against [his]1311-his headboard . One hand is on [my]0-i hip , the other cupping [my]0-i breast . [He]126-jameson ’s so big that [I]0-i can feel every inch of [him]126-jameson deep inside [my]0-i body . [He]126-jameson took [me]0-i hard and fast the first time , [me]0-i on [my]0-i knees and [him]1311-his behind [me]0-i . [I]0-i watched [us]1313-us in the mirror . Every muscle in [his]126-jameson torso contracted as [he]126-jameson pumped [me]0-i , and [his]126-jameson dark eyes held [mine]0-i . It was the hottest thing [I]0-i ’ve ever seen . [His]126-jameson hand has a strong grip on [my]0-i hip bone as [he]126-jameson rocks [me]0-i back and forward with force . [Our]1313-us eyes are locked , and this is one of those moments where neither of [us]1313-us speaks — it ’s perfect without words . [He]126-jameson grabs a handful of [my]0-i hair and drags [me]0-i down to [him]126-jameson ; [his]126-jameson lips take [mine]0-i , and [we]1313-us kiss . [His]126-jameson tongue is sliding into [my]0-i mouth at just the right angle . “ Legs up , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers as [he]126-jameson lifts [my]0-i knees to a squatting position . [My]0-i face falters . “ What ? ”[126-jameson] “ Be careful . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson wo n’t hurt [you]0-i — [you]0-i know that . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson kisses [me]0-i again with just the right amount of suction ; [my]0-i body knows who ’s in control here . [Jameson Miles]126-jameson may have given [me]0-i control of drink ordering , but it ’s glaringly obvious [he]126-jameson will never give [me]0-i control in [the bedroom]925-the bedroom . Not that [I]0-i want [him]126-jameson to ; what [he]126-jameson does is sheer perfection . [He]126-jameson begins to lift [me]0-i , slowly and carefully at first , and [we]1315-we go at a controlled speed . [He]126-jameson looks up at [me]0-i in awe . “ Oh , ”[0-i] [I]0-i moan . “ So . . . good , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whimper . [His]126-jameson eyes roll back in [his]126-jameson head as [he]126-jameson lifts [me]0-i higher and slams [me]0-i down harder . [My]0-i hands are on [his]126-jameson broad shoulders , and [I]0-i feel the muscles contract beneath [me]0-i . [He]126-jameson begins to moan as [he]126-jameson slams [me]0-i onto [his]126-jameson body , the look on [his]126-jameson face one of sheer ecstasy . [I]0-i tip [my]0-i head back as a freight train of an orgasm comes shuddering deep within [me]0-i . “ Oh fuck , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson cries out as [he]126-jameson holds [himself]126-jameson deep inside [me]0-i . [I]0-i feel the telling jerk as [his]126-jameson body empties itself in [mine]0-i . [His]126-jameson eyes search [mine]0-i , and in slow motion , [he]126-jameson reaches up and cups [my]0-i face and brings [my]0-i lips down to [his]126-jameson . [We]1316-we kiss , and it ’s slow , tender , and intimate — nothing like the detached version [we]1316-we talked about . [He]126-jameson ’s right here with [me]0-i . [I]0-i know [he]126-jameson is . “ [You]0-i are so fucking beautiful , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson murmurs against [my]0-i lips as [he]126-jameson pulls [me]0-i close . [I]0-i lie down on [his]126-jameson chest and smile against [his]126-jameson skin as [his]126-jameson arms wrap around [me]0-i . [I]0-i can feel [his]126-jameson heart beating hard against [mine]0-i , and [I]0-i feel so safe and cherished . [I]0-i know this is supposed to be [friends with benefits]3744-friends with benefits . But it ’s not . . . it ’s more . What kind of more [I]0-i just do n’t know . [I]0-i feel a hand on [my]0-i behind , and it gives [me]0-i a sturdy pat . “ Come on . ”[0-i] [I]0-i screw up [my]0-i face and roll toward [him]126-jameson . “ What ? ”[0-i] “ Up [you]126-jameson get . ”[126-jameson] “ Huh ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i stretch and open [my]0-i eyes . The drapes are pulled , and sunshine is beaming through the huge windows . [I]0-i look around , half - asleep . “ What time is it ? ”[0-i] “ It ’s eight . Get up . [We]3758-we ’re going for a run around [Central Park]22-central park . ”[126-jameson] “ Who is ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . [He]126-jameson ’s in a towel and freshly showered . “ [Me]126-jameson and [you]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i scratch [my]0-i head in confusion . “ [You]126-jameson had a shower to go for a run ? ”[0-i] “ [I]126-jameson smelled like sex . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smirks as [he]126-jameson leans down and kisses [me]0-i on the lips . [I]0-i wrap [my]0-i arms around [him]126-jameson and hold [him]126-jameson down . [He]126-jameson pulls from [my]0-i grip . “ Come on . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson have no stuff here . What shoes would [I]126-jameson wear ? ”[126-jameson] “ What size are [you]126-jameson ? ”[126-jameson] “ Eight . ”[126-jameson] “ Hmm . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson puts [his]126-jameson hands on [his]126-jameson hips and thinks . “ Well , [you]0-i can wear some of [mine]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson ’ll fall over and break [my]126-jameson neck , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] “ Hmm , okay . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson disappears into [the walk - in closet]1318-the walk - in closet and comes out in black Nike shorts and a blue Nike T - shirt . [I]0-i smirk when [I]0-i see [him]126-jameson . “ What ? ”[0-i] “ Are [you]126-jameson sponsored by Nike today or something ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson looks down at [himself]126-jameson and smiles . “ No , it just happens to be comfortable . ”[126-jameson] “ Like this bed . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile sleepily as [I]0-i snuggle back under the covers . [He]126-jameson sits down to put [his]126-jameson shoes on , and [I]0-i watch [him]126-jameson for a moment . “ So how does this work ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ How does what work ? ”[0-i] “ Well . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause as [I]0-i try to articulate what [I]0-i want to say without sounding needy . “ [I]0-i ’ve never done this casual thing before . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug shyly . “ How do [we]3759-we navigate this ? When do [we]3759-we see [each other]351-each other ? ”[0-i] “ Well . . . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson bends to tie [his]126-jameson shoe . “ [We]3759-we just play it by ear , [I]126-jameson guess . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i frown . But what if [he]126-jameson did n’t call ? [I]0-i ’d be waiting all week . Oh , [I]0-i do n’t like the sound of that . “ [I]126-jameson think [I]126-jameson would prefer set days . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson frowns . “ How many days ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i shrug . Shit , did that sound clingy ? [I]0-i ’ll play it down . “ One day a week . ”[0-i] “ [I]126-jameson want to see [you]0-i more than once a week , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson scoffs . “ [You]0-i do ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles , knowing exactly what [I]0-i ’m doing . [He]126-jameson stands and then leans down and kisses [me]0-i . “ Yes , three times a week . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i try to hide [my]0-i smile . “ What days ? ”[0-i] “ Do [we]3761-we have to have set days ? ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson kind of do . ”[126-jameson] “ Why ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug as [I]0-i twist the blanket between [my]0-i fingers , embarrassed by [my]0-i neediness . [He]126-jameson puts [his]126-jameson finger under [my]0-i chin and brings [my]0-i face to [his]126-jameson . “ Why , [Emily]91-emily ? ”[126-jameson] “ Because [I]126-jameson hate waiting around , and then [we]3761-we know not to plan anything else on [our]3761-we days . ”[126-jameson] “ Okay . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson puts [his]126-jameson hands on [his]126-jameson hips . “ When do [you]0-i want to see [me]126-jameson ? ”[126-jameson] “ Maybe twice through the week and once on weekends . ”[0-i] [I]0-i hesitate as [I]0-i watch for [his]126-jameson cues . “ But only a few hours each time , of course . ”[0-i] “ No . ”[126-jameson] Shit . [I]0-i ’m going too far with [my]0-i demands here . “ Two full nights through the week and one full night and half a day on the weekend . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ Half a day . ”[0-i] “ Yes , starting today . [I]0-i want [my]0-i half day this morning . ”[0-i] “ Today ? Why today ? ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i ’m going to go for a run while [you]91-emily go back to sleep . Then [I]0-i ’m coming [home]3076-home , and [we]3763-we are going to shower , and then [I]0-i ’m making [you]91-emily breakfast . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile softly . That sounds really good . “ And then [we]3763-we ’re going to come back to bed , and [I]126-jameson ’m going to fuck [you]91-emily stupid again to get [me]126-jameson through another few days without [you]91-emily . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson cups [my]0-i face in [his]126-jameson hand . “ Okay ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks . [He]126-jameson ’s really quite swoony when [he]126-jameson ’s being nice . [I]0-i nod as [I]0-i try to control [my]0-i goofy smile . [He]126-jameson closes the drapes and then lays [me]0-i back down and tucks [me]0-i in and kisses [me]0-i softly on [my]0-i temple . “ Go back to sleep , [sweetheart]3764-sweetheart , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes and smile into [my]0-i pillow , and [I]0-i hear [him]126-jameson leave [the apartment]3531-the apartment . [I]0-i roll onto [my]0-i back and look up at the fancy ceiling . [The man]265-the man ’s [a god]385-a god . [I]0-i doze for the next hour and wake as [Jameson]126-jameson walks into [the bedroom]925-the bedroom . [He]126-jameson ’s wet with perspiration and breathing heavily , and [I]0-i sit up on [my]0-i elbows as [I]0-i watch [him]126-jameson . “ Where the hell did [you]126-jameson run to , [Antarctica]174-antarctica ? ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson chuckles and shakes [his]126-jameson head , still out of breath . “ [You]126-jameson must really run hard , huh ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson nods as [he]126-jameson puts [his]126-jameson hands on [his]126-jameson hips . “ The harder [I]126-jameson run , the better the effects . ”[126-jameson] “ Effects on what ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ [My]126-jameson stress levels . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson disappears into [the bathroom]328-the bathroom and turns the shower on . Oh , this is news . [He]126-jameson has stress issues ? Well , [I]0-i guess [he]126-jameson would . [His]126-jameson workload is huge , after all . “ Are [you]0-i getting in ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson calls . “ Yes , ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i call as [I]0-i amble in . [He]126-jameson ’s in the shower , and the water is running over [his]126-jameson head . [His]126-jameson breathing is slowly returning to normal . [I]0-i get in , and [he]126-jameson wraps [me]0-i in [his]126-jameson arms and kisses [me]0-i softly . “ Good morning , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Good morning , [[my]0-i [Em]91-emily]3765-my em . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson lips dust [mine]0-i . [I]0-i smile goofily up at [him]126-jameson . “ What ? ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i like it when [you]126-jameson call [me]0-i that . ”[0-i] “ [You]0-i do ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles . “ [Your]126-jameson princess [Em]91-emily . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i bat [my]0-i eyelashes to prove [my]0-i point . [He]126-jameson chuckles as [he]126-jameson picks up the soap and begins to wash [me]0-i . “ [I]126-jameson have no doubt that underneath all that snarky [Ms. Foster]146-ms. foster act is [a pure sweetheart]3766-a pure sweetheart . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]0-i have n’t been snarky once , ”[0-i] [I]0-i gasp . [He]126-jameson smiles down at [me]0-i as [he]126-jameson tucks a piece of hair behind [my]0-i ear . “ And look how beautiful [you]0-i are . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i giggle and lean against [his]126-jameson chest . [He]126-jameson washes [my]0-i back , [my]0-i shoulders , [my]0-i breasts , and then down [my]0-i legs . [I]0-i watch [him]126-jameson as [he]126-jameson concentrates on [his]126-jameson task . Then [he]126-jameson moves down to [my]0-i sex , and [his]126-jameson eyes come to [mine]0-i while [he]126-jameson touches [me]0-i there . [Our]1324-our eyes are locked , but this does n’t feel sexual . It feels intimate . [I]0-i stare into [his]126-jameson big blue eyes , and [I]0-i swear this is n’t [the same man who runs [Miles Media]103-miles media]1325-the same man who runs miles media . [The man with [me]0-i]1326-the man with me now is sweet and tender . Everything [Jameson Miles]126-jameson is not . “ Let [me]0-i wash [you]126-jameson . ”[0-i] [I]0-i take the soap from [him]126-jameson and lather [my]0-i hands together and roam them over [his]126-jameson broad chest and muscular shoulders and biceps , then down [his]126-jameson rippled abs to [his]126-jameson groin , and [I]0-i clench [my]0-i insides while [I]0-i wash [him]126-jameson there . [He]126-jameson leans down and kisses [my]0-i temple softly , as if knowing [I]0-i ’m holding [myself]0-i back from pouncing on [him]126-jameson . [We]1327-we need to stop having sex all the time ; it ’s getting ridiculous . The sexual attraction is so strong that neither of [us]1327-we can get [our]1327-we fill of [each other]351-each other . “ [You]126-jameson ’ve turned [me]0-i into [a complete sex maniac]3767-a complete sex maniac , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [He]126-jameson smiles down at [me]0-i as [his]126-jameson lips dust [mine]0-i . “ [I]126-jameson think [you]0-i already suffered that affliction before [we]1327-we met — if [our]1327-we first night was anything to go by . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson ’ve never been like this before . ”[126-jameson] “ Like what ? ”[126-jameson] “ [You]126-jameson bring something out in [me]0-i that [no other man]3768-no other man has . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes search [his]126-jameson . “ [You]126-jameson ’re different from [anyone [I]0-i ’ve ever been with]3769-anyone i ’ve ever been with . ”[0-i] The water falls over [us]1329-we , and [I]0-i do n’t know why [I]0-i just told [him]126-jameson that . [I]0-i can feel [myself]0-i getting attached , and [I]0-i do n’t know how to stop blurting things out . [I]0-i ’m going to ruin everything . Stop talking , [fool]336-fool . [He]126-jameson takes [my]0-i face in [his]126-jameson hands and kisses [me]0-i . [His]126-jameson tongue swipes through [my]0-i open mouth , and it ’s deep , erotic , tender , and goddamn . . . so fucking perfect that [I]0-i ca n’t even deal . “ [I]126-jameson ’m taking [you]0-i back to bed , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson murmurs darkly . “ Please , ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i whimper . [We]1329-we get out , and [he]126-jameson dries [us]1329-we both and then leads [me]0-i back to bed and lays [me]0-i down and spreads [my]0-i legs open . [I]0-i watch as [he]126-jameson rolls a condom on and lies down on top of [me]0-i . [We]1329-we stare at [each other]351-each other as [he]126-jameson holds [himself]126-jameson up on [his]126-jameson elbows , and [his]126-jameson body finds that place between [my]0-i legs . [I]0-i grab [his]126-jameson behind , but [he]126-jameson stops [me]0-i from pulling [him]126-jameson in . “ [I]126-jameson want it slow , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson breathes . Oh God , [my]0-i insides begin to ripple in excitement . “ [I]126-jameson want [you]0-i . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson lips take [mine]0-i , and [our]1329-we kiss becomes frantic as [his]126-jameson body slides in slow and deep . [My]0-i back arches off the bed in pleasure at [his]126-jameson possession . [I]0-i moan loudly , and [his]126-jameson eyes roll back in pleasure . For twenty minutes , [we]1329-we slowly appreciate [each other]351-each other ’s bodies ; [he]126-jameson ’s gentle and loving and so , so deep inside [me]0-i . [His]126-jameson open mouth roams from [my]0-i collarbone , up [my]0-i neck , and across [my]0-i jaw to [my]0-i lips . “ Fuck , [Emily]91-emily , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . “ [You]91-emily turn [me]126-jameson inside out , [baby]3139-baby . ”[126-jameson] If [I]0-i could reply , [I]0-i would , but [I]0-i ’m too busy in making - love heaven here . Being fucked hard by [Jameson Miles]126-jameson is hot as hell , but being made love to by [Jameson Miles]126-jameson is life changing . [I]0-i ’ll never be the same . Where the hell does [a girl]446-a girl go after sex like this ? It builds inside [me]0-i , and [I]0-i begin to quiver , but instead of getting harder like [he]126-jameson normally does , [he]126-jameson stops still . “ Take it , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . “ What ? ”[126-jameson] “ Stay still , and take it from [me]0-i . Clench [your]0-i orgasm in . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes search [his]126-jameson . Holy mother fuck . [I]0-i ca n’t deal with how hot [this man]327-this man is . “ Fuck [me]126-jameson , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . “ Do n’t move a muscle , except for here . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson flexes [his]126-jameson dick , and [I]0-i feel it deep inside . “ [I]126-jameson want [you]0-i to show [me]126-jameson , just [me]126-jameson . . . how [you]0-i feel . ”[126-jameson] “ Oh God , ”[0-i] [I]0-i moan . “ Come on , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson coaches . [I]0-i clench , and [he]126-jameson smiles darkly . “ Harder . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i clench again , and [his]126-jameson lip curls in excitement . “ That ’s it , [baby]3139-baby . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson eyes close in ecstasy . “ Milk [me]126-jameson , and show [me]126-jameson who it belongs to . ”[126-jameson] Something snaps inside [me]0-i when [I]0-i hear [him]126-jameson say that [his]126-jameson cock belongs to [me]0-i . [I]0-i bring [my]0-i legs up and wrap them around [his]126-jameson waist and begin to clench in a rhythm . [He]126-jameson hisses in approval . “ So . . . good , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [we]1335-we stare at [each other]351-each other . “ So . . . fucking good . ”[0-i] To [the outside world]1337-the outside world it would look like [we]1335-we are just cuddling as [we]1335-we lie perfectly still , but inside , every wall [I]0-i ’ve ever built up is being demolished , clench by clench . [He]126-jameson begins to moan , and it sounds too good — [I]0-i ca n’t hold it . [I]0-i clench as hard as [I]0-i can , and [we]1335-we both cry out as an orgasm tears between [us]1335-we . And then [he]126-jameson kisses [me]0-i , and it ’s sweet and tender , and [I]0-i feel emotion run between [us]1335-we . [I]0-i hold [him]126-jameson close , cheek to cheek , as [I]0-i hang on to [him]126-jameson for dear life . “ [You]0-i ’re so fucking perfect , [Emily]91-emily , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . [I]0-i run [my]0-i fingers through [his]126-jameson stubble . “ It ’s [you]0-i who ’s perfect . ”[0-i] [I]0-i kiss [him]126-jameson softly . “ [You]126-jameson should stop it immediately . ”[0-i] “ Why is that ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles . “ [I]126-jameson think [I]126-jameson may be addicted . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson chuckles and rolls onto [his]126-jameson back and pulls [me]0-i over [him]126-jameson . “ No , [I]0-i want [you]126-jameson addicted . ”[0-i] [I]0-i laugh . “ Why would [you]126-jameson want [me]0-i addicted ? ”[0-i] “ Because [I]126-jameson am , and [I]126-jameson do n’t want to be in this alone . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson eyes search [mine]0-i , and [I]0-i feel [my]0-i heart free - fall from [my]0-i chest . “ [You]126-jameson ’re not in this alone , [Jay]158-jay . ”[126-jameson] “ Good . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson kisses [my]0-i temple as [he]126-jameson seems to relax . [We]1338-we lie together in a tangled mess , and [he]126-jameson dozes back to sleep . [My]0-i mind begins to go into overdrive . [I]0-i have feelings for [him]126-jameson — [I]0-i know [I]0-i do . In just two days , [I]0-i ’ve developed feelings for [him]126-jameson . How is this going to end ? [I]0-i ’m totally screwed . An hour later , [I]0-i wake to the smell of bacon cooking , and [I]0-i smile up at the ceiling . [I]0-i do n’t know what [this alternate universe]1339-this alternate universe is , but [I]0-i like it . [I]0-i throw on a robe [I]0-i found hanging in [the bathroom]328-the bathroom and make [my]0-i way out into [the living area]939-the living area . [I]0-i turn the corner and see a glass wall with a view over [New York]3-new york and [Central Park]22-central park . Over - the - top wealth and luxury hit [me]0-i in the face , and [I]0-i stop still on the spot . [I]0-i ca n’t get [my]0-i head around the fact that this is all [his]126-jameson . This money is [his]126-jameson money . [My]0-i eyes roam over the beautiful floors , gorgeous rugs and furnishings , then to the fireplace and up to the huge gilded mirror above it . [I]0-i ’ve never even seen [an apartment like this]1342-an apartment like this in a magazine , let alone been in one . [I]0-i feel so out of place . “ Hey , there [you]0-i are . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles as [he]126-jameson comes around the corner and sees [me]0-i . [I]0-i give [him]126-jameson a lopsided smile . [He]126-jameson frowns as [he]126-jameson sees [my]0-i face . “ What ’s wrong ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i twist [my]0-i hands in front of [me]0-i nervously . “ [[Your]126-jameson apartment]3695-your apartment freaks [me]126-jameson out . ”[126-jameson] “ Why ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug , embarrassed by [my]0-i slummy standards . “ [It]3695-your apartment ’s so fancy . [I]126-jameson feel like [I]126-jameson do n’t belong [here]275-here . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson takes [me]0-i in [his]126-jameson arms . “ What does that mean ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i shrug . “ Is that why [you]126-jameson did n’t want to come [here]275-here last weekend ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i nod . “ Yes . ”[0-i] “ Explain to [me]126-jameson why ? ”[126-jameson] “ When [I]126-jameson ’m [here]275-here , [I]126-jameson ’m reminded of how much [we]3776-we do n’t have in common . ”[126-jameson] “ And that bothers [you]126-jameson ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i nod shyly . [He]126-jameson frowns , as if trying to understand . “ [You]0-i ’re [the first woman who ’s ever had a problem with [my]126-jameson money]3777-the first woman who ’s ever had a problem with my money . ”[126-jameson] “ It ’s a turnoff to [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] “ Turnoff ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson splutters . “ [I]126-jameson would prefer [you]126-jameson to be poor , actually . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smile , knowing how ridiculous that sounds . [He]126-jameson chuckles . “ Well , that makes one of [us]3776-we . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson leads [me]0-i into [the kitchen]818-the kitchen , and [I]0-i see a breakfast of bacon and eggs on sourdough bread with a side of avocado . “ Yum . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i take a seat . “ [I]126-jameson ’ll have [you]0-i know that [I]126-jameson ’m [an excellent breakfast chef]3778-an excellent breakfast chef . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson sits down beside [me]0-i , looking very pleased with [himself]126-jameson . [My]0-i smile fades , and [I]0-i pick up [my]0-i knife and fork . That ’s because [he]126-jameson cooks so many breakfasts . Stop it . [I]0-i take [my]0-i first mouthful . [I]0-i wonder how [many women]1344-many women have sat here just like this and eaten [his]126-jameson cooking after having amazing sex all night . For Christ ’s sake , stop it . “ What are [you]126-jameson doing today ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask to take [my]0-i mind off [my]0-i negative thoughts . “ Playing golf with [[my]126-jameson brothers]3514-my brothers this afternoon , and then [I]126-jameson ’ll probably have dinner with [them]3514-my brothers and [[my]126-jameson parents]1276-my parents . [They]3514-my brothers go back to [London]8-london this week sometime . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson sips [his]126-jameson coffee . “ [You]126-jameson ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i imagine the four of [them]1345-them playing golf . “ [I]126-jameson have to food [shop]3781-shop . [I]126-jameson ’ll go for a walk and then write some bogus news stories . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson stops eating . “ [You]0-i do n’t have to work on the weekend , [you]0-i know . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson know . [I]126-jameson just like to be ahead of schedule in case something comes up . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson nods and goes back to [his]126-jameson breakfast . “ Are [you]0-i going out tonight ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks casually . [I]0-i ’m not , but [I]0-i do n’t want [him]126-jameson to think [I]0-i ’m at [home]3076-home pining over [him]126-jameson . “ Yes , [I]126-jameson am . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson eyes come to [me]0-i , and [his]126-jameson jaw ticks as if [he]126-jameson ’s angered . “ Where are [you]0-i going ? ”[126-jameson] “ Out to dinner with [Molly]111-molly and [Aaron]110-aaron . ”[126-jameson] “ Who ’s [Aaron]110-aaron ? ”[126-jameson] “ [[My]126-jameson friend]3515-my friend [I]126-jameson work with , [the one who sits next to [me]126-jameson]3783-the one who sits next to me . [He]3515-my friend ’s gay . ”[126-jameson] “ Oh . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson cuts into [his]126-jameson toast , mollified for the moment . [I]0-i watch [him]126-jameson for a moment as [he]126-jameson eats in silence . “ Would it bother [you]126-jameson if [I]0-i were going clubbing ? ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson sips [his]126-jameson coffee , stalling for [his]126-jameson answer . “ Well , if [your]126-jameson performance from last weekend is anything to go by , yes , it would . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smile softly . “ What ? ”[0-i] “ Nothing . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug ; [I]0-i like that it bothers [him]126-jameson . [He]126-jameson rubs [his]126-jameson hand up [my]0-i bare thigh and leans over to kiss [my]0-i cheek . “ [I]126-jameson ’m not sharing [you]0-i . [I]126-jameson do n’t want [you]0-i dancing with [anybody]532-anybody . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smile and rub [my]0-i hands through [his]126-jameson stubble as [I]0-i look into [his]126-jameson big blue eyes . “ Good , then [I]0-i wo n’t . ”[0-i] An hour later , [the limo]811-the limo pulls up in front of [[my]0-i apartment]940-my apartment . [Jameson]126-jameson picks up [my]0-i hand and kisses the back of it as [his]126-jameson eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ Until Tuesday . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smile softly at [the beautiful man in front of [me]0-i]1349-the beautiful man in front of me . “ Until Tuesday . ”[0-i] [I]0-i kiss [him]126-jameson softly on the lips . [The driver]635-the driver opens [the car]422-the car door , and [I]0-i walk up to the front door of [[my]0-i building]848-my building and turn and wave . [The car]422-the car waits for [me]0-i to go inside and then pulls out slowly and drives down [the street]654-the street . [I]0-i exhale heavily as [I]0-i anticipate spending the rest of [my]0-i weekend alone . Damn it , Tuesday is so far away . [I]0-i lie in a state of deep relaxation on [my]0-i couch . Rebelling against [Jameson]126-jameson , [I]0-i did in fact order [Uber Eats]173-uber eats for one , and yes , [I]0-i put the chain on [my]0-i door , just in case . [My]0-i phone dances across the table , and the name [Aaron]110-aaron lights up the screen . “ Hello . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i smirk . Damn , [this man]327-this man makes [me]0-i laugh . “ Oh . . . [my]327-this man fuck , ”[327-this man] [he]327-this man stammers . “ [I]327-this man just hacked [Paul]131-paul ’s email , and [he]131-paul ’s meeting [a guy at [a club]492-a club]3785-a guy at a club tonight . ”[327-this man] [I]0-i sit up . “ What ? ”[327-this man] “ Yes , and it gets worse . ”[0-i] “ How can it possibly ? ”[327-this man] “ [He]131-paul ’s been on Grindr . ”[327-this man] “ Oh [my]0-i God , are [you]327-this man kidding [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i gasp . “ [He]131-paul ’s on Grindr ? ”[0-i] “ Yes , get dressed . [We]3787-we are going down there to bust a move . ”[327-this man] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i shriek . “ [You]327-this man heard [me]0-i . Put on something sexy . [I]0-i ’ll be [there]3073-there in half an hour . ”[0-i] “ But . . . ”[327-this man] The phone clicks as [he]327-this man hangs up . Oh shit . Damn it , [I]0-i do n’t want to go out tonight . [My]0-i phone rings again , and the name [Molly]111-molly lights up the screen . “ [I]111-molly know , ”[111-molly] [I]0-i answer , knowing that [Aaron]110-aaron would have called [her]1356-i too . “ [He]131-paul ’s on fucking Grindr ? ”[1356-i] [she]1356-i shrieks . “ [I]1356-i know . ”[1356-i] “ [You]327-this man do [me]0-i a favor . Tonight when [you]327-this man see [Paul]131-paul ’s pencil dick , [you]327-this man grind it to a pulp with [your]327-this man fucking shoe . ”[0-i] [I]0-i giggle . “ [I]0-i ’m hoping not to see it , [Moll]111-molly . ”[0-i] “ [I]1356-i ca n’t believe this shit , ”[1356-i] [she]1356-i snaps in outrage . “ [I]1356-i know . ”[1356-i] “ [Aaron]110-aaron is way too good for [him]131-paul . ”[1356-i] “ [I]1356-i know . Are [you]1356-i coming on [our]3789-our bust - a - move mission ? ”[1356-i] “ [I]0-i ca n’t . [I]0-i ’ve got [the kids]3241-the kids . Wear a GoPro strapped to [your]3241-the kids head so [I]0-i can see what happens . ”[0-i] “ Ca n’t [you]1356-i drop [the kids]3241-the kids with [[their]3241-the kids dad]3242-their dad ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ This is an emergency . ”[0-i] “ No . [He]110-aaron ’s on a date with a whore bag . ”[0-i] [I]0-i giggle again . “ Honestly , so much shit going on around here . ”[0-i] “ [I]1356-i know , ”[1356-i] [she]1356-i snaps . “ Okay , [I]1356-i ’m calling [you]0-i every hour . Answer [your]0-i phone . ”[1356-i] [She]1356-i hangs up . An hour later , [Aaron]110-aaron leads [me]0-i through [the nightclub]1357-the nightclub by the hand as [he]110-aaron scans [the club]1106-the club . It ’s small and dark , and the music is the dance - club type . The beat is tantric . “ Do [you]110-aaron see [him]110-aaron ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i call . “ Nope . ”[0-i] [He]110-aaron narrows [his]110-aaron eyes as [he]110-aaron looks around . “ What are [you]110-aaron going to do if [you]110-aaron do see [him]110-aaron ? ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i ask . “ End it . ”[0-i] “ Why do n’t [you]110-aaron just end it anyway ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ [I]0-i need proof . ”[0-i] “ The email is the proof , [Aaron]110-aaron , ”[0-i] [I]0-i huff . “ [I]110-aaron knew [he]110-aaron was up to something , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron fumes . “ [That fucking asshole]3793-that fucking asshole has spent the last week in [my]110-aaron bed , and [he]110-aaron ’s trolling [Grindr]175-grindr for sex . ”[110-aaron] “ Were [you]110-aaron in a relationship , like full - on ? ”[0-i] “ No , [he]110-aaron said [he]110-aaron did n’t want [a boyfriend]526-a boyfriend but that [he]110-aaron wanted to have sex with [me]0-i only . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . That sounds very familiar . “ So [you]110-aaron ’ve been monogamous with [him]110-aaron all along ? ”[0-i] “ Of course [I]0-i have . [I]0-i do n’t fuck around . ”[0-i] [I]0-i scrunch up [my]0-i nose in disgust . “ Honestly , kick [this douche]3795-this douche to the curb . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i will . As soon as [I]0-i find [him]110-aaron . ”[0-i] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes and feel [my]0-i phone vibrate in [my]0-i bag . [I]0-i dig it out . “ Hello , [Molly]111-molly . ”[0-i] “ What ’s happening ? ”[0-i] “ [We]3796-we ca n’t find [him]110-aaron , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply as [I]0-i look around . “ Go and sit in the corner out of view , and wait for [them]3797-them to get there . Do n’t stand where [they]3797-them can see [you]0-i . ”[0-i] “ Oh , right . ”[0-i] [I]0-i put [my]0-i hand over the phone . “ [Molly]111-molly says [we]1359-us should sit somewhere out of sight so [he]110-aaron does n’t see [us]1359-us . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron points at [me]0-i . “ Great idea . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron grabs [me]0-i by the hand and leads [us]1359-us over to a booth . “ [I]110-aaron ’ll sit here . [You]0-i go and get drinks , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron snaps as [he]110-aaron slides into the seat . [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . “ Are [[your]111-molly kids]3254-your kids really fucking [home]3076-home ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap to [Molly]111-molly . “ How did [I]111-molly get stuck with this job ? ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly laughs . “ [I]111-molly ’ll call back in an hour . ”[111-molly] Then [she]111-molly hangs up . “ What do [you]110-aaron want to drink ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ A pink flamingo . ”[0-i] [I]0-i look at [him]110-aaron deadpan . “ That is the gayest drink [I]0-i ever heard of . ”[0-i] “ Because [I]110-aaron ’m gay . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron widens [his]110-aaron eyes in exasperation ; [he]110-aaron ’s in no mood for [my]0-i jokes tonight . “ Just get it . ”[0-i] [I]0-i giggle and head to [the bar]534-the bar to wait in line . “ Hey , [Foster]91-emily , ”[0-i] [I]0-i hear [a man]3093-a man ’s voice call from behind . [I]0-i turn and see [Jake]158-jay from [the investigation team]1362-the investigation team . “ Oh , hi . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i smile . “ What are [you]110-aaron doing here ? ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron holds up [his]110-aaron drink . “ Drinking . ”[110-aaron] “ Obviously . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk . [His]110-aaron eyes scan up and down [my]0-i body in [my]0-i black dress . “ Wow , [you]110-aaron look hot . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i smile bashfully . This is awkward . “ Thanks . ”[0-i] “ Want to come dance ? ”[110-aaron] “ Um . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . [Oh God]88-god . “ No , thanks anyway . [I]0-i ’m here with [Aaron]110-aaron . ”[0-i] “ Oh , where is [he]110-aaron ? ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron looks around . Oh shit , now [I]0-i ’ve done it . “ [He]110-aaron ’s in a booth at the back . ”[110-aaron] “ [I]110-aaron ’ll go say hi . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron disappears off in that direction . Oh great . Now [we]1363-we are going to have to act normal , when all [we]1363-we want to do is [Paul]131-paul - hate and spy . [I]0-i get [our]1363-we drinks and head back to the table and find [Aaron]110-aaron and [Jake]158-jay deep in conversation about work . Hmm . [I]0-i wonder . Does [he]110-aaron think [Aaron]110-aaron ’s involved and is milking [him]110-aaron for information ? [I]0-i sip [my]0-i drink as [they]1364-they talk , and [I]0-i do an internal assessment of [him]110-aaron . [He]110-aaron ’s actually quite good looking , with sandy hair , a square jaw , and dimples , and [he]110-aaron has a great laugh . [I]0-i ’ve never noticed [him]110-aaron before because whenever [Jameson]126-jameson is in [the same room]1365-the same room , [all men]3100-all men pale in comparison . “ [I]110-aaron ’m going to get a drink and come back and sit with [[you]1364-they guys]3464-you guys , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron says as [he]110-aaron stands . “ [You]0-i want one , [Foster]91-emily ? ”[110-aaron] “ No thanks . ”[0-i] [I]0-i fake a smile . “ [You]110-aaron , [Az]176-az ? ”[0-i] “ No , [I]110-aaron ’m good , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron replies . [He]110-aaron disappears to [the bar]534-the bar . “ Oh [my]110-aaron God , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron scoffs . “ [I]110-aaron did n’t come here to talk about work , and what ’s with the fucking nicknames ? [He]110-aaron ’s not [[my]110-aaron friend]3515-my friend . ”[110-aaron] “ [I]0-i know , right ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . “ Why did [you]0-i tell [him]110-aaron where [I]0-i was ? ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i do n’t know , ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . “ [He]110-aaron put [me]0-i on the spot . ”[0-i] “ Ugh , great . Now [we]3802-we have to sit with [this wanker]3803-this wanker . ”[0-i] “ Can [we]3802-we just go ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ This whole fucking night is a disaster . ”[0-i] “ No . [We]3802-we are staying [here]275-here until the lights come on . ”[0-i] [I]0-i put [my]0-i head into [my]0-i hands , and [my]0-i phone rings . “ Hello , [Molly]111-molly , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap , annoyed that [she]1368-she ’s avoided this hell . “ Nothing ’s fucking happened yet . ”[1368-she] Monday morning , 10:00 a.m. [My]0-i phone on [my]0-i desk rings . “ Hello , [Emily]91-emily , ”[116-sammia] [Sammia]116-sammia says . “ [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles would like to see [you]91-emily in [[his]114-mr. miles office]496-his office right away , please . ”[116-sammia] Excitement runs through [me]0-i . “ Okay , [I]0-i ’ll come now . ”[0-i] [I]0-i fix [my]0-i hair and reapply [my]0-i lipstick and practically run to [the elevator]428-the elevator . [I]0-i hope [he]1370-his ’s missed [me]0-i and is making an excuse to see [me]0-i . [I]0-i get to [the top floor]467-the top floor and stride through [the foyer]799-the foyer . “ Hello , [Sammia]116-sammia . ”[0-i] “ Hi , [Emily]91-emily . Just go through . ”[0-i] “ Thank [you]116-sammia . ”[0-i] [I]0-i can walk on the marble today , because [I]0-i finally bought those new shoes with the rubber soles . Not a click in sight . [I]0-i knock on [his]1370-his door . “ Come in , ”[1370-his] [his]1370-his deep voice purrs . [I]0-i open the door , and [my]0-i face drops . [Jake]158-jay is sitting in front of [Jameson]126-jameson ’s desk . “ Hello . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i smile . What ’s [he]158-jay doing here ? Buzz off . This is [my]0-i time with [him]158-jay . [Jake]158-jay turns to [me]0-i , and [his]158-jay face lights up . “ Hey , [Foster]91-emily . ”[158-jay] [Jameson]126-jameson ’s eyes hold [Jake]158-jay ’s . “ [[You]158-jay two]3244-you two seem very chummy . ”[126-jameson] “ Oh , [we]3244-you two went clubbing together on Saturday night , did n’t [we]3244-you two , [Foz]177-foz ? ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay smiles happily . [Jameson]126-jameson ’s eyes come back to [me]0-i , and [his]126-jameson jaw ticks in anger . Holy fuck . Chapter 13 “ Oh , ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer in a fluster . “ [We]3244-you two ran into [each other]351-each other , that ’s all . ”[0-i] [Jameson]126-jameson raises an eyebrow , unimpressed . “ Oh , do n’t be shy , [Foster]91-emily . [We]3244-you two get along famously , ”[158-jay] [Jake]158-jay the imbecile says . [I]0-i feel the blood drain from [my]0-i face . Just shut the hell up , would [you]126-jameson ? [I]0-i turn back to [Jameson]126-jameson , hoping to change the subject . “ [You]126-jameson wanted to see [me]0-i , [sir]3064-sir ? ”[0-i] “ Yes . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson eyes float over to [Jake]158-jay . “ [I]126-jameson want to know what leads [you]158-jay have , [Mr. Peters]178-mr. peters . ”[126-jameson] “ Call [me]158-jay [Jake]158-jay , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay says . [Jameson]126-jameson glares at [him]158-jay but remains silent . Oh man . This is uncomfortable . [I]0-i grip [my]0-i notepad with white - knuckle force . Why did [he]126-jameson have to say [we]1373-we went out together ? [We]1373-we did not go out together . [I]0-i feel [my]0-i face begin to perspire . “ Get to the point , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson snaps . “ Well , [I]126-jameson ’m chasing a few leads , nothing concrete yet . It ’s very early days . ”[126-jameson] “ Early days ? ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson repeats . “ Are [you]126-jameson aware , [Mr. Peters]178-mr. peters , of the importance of a swift resolution on this matter ? ”[126-jameson] “ Yes , [sir]3064-sir , but — ”[126-jameson] “ No buts , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson growls . “ [Our]1373-we stocks dropped by four million dollars today . Every damn day [they]3810-they drop by that much . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson slams [his]126-jameson hand on the table , making [us]1373-we both jump . “ Do not tell [me]126-jameson it ’s early days , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson bellows . [Jake]158-jay and [I]0-i wither in [our]1373-we chairs . [I]0-i ’ve never seen [Jameson]126-jameson this angry . [He]126-jameson is stressed . [I]0-i wonder if [he]126-jameson went for a run this morning . [I]0-i ’m guessing not . “ [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles , ”[0-i] [I]0-i interrupt . [Jameson]126-jameson puts [his]126-jameson hand up to silence [me]0-i . “ [Emily]91-emily , [I]126-jameson want four stories this week . ”[126-jameson] “ Yes , [sir]3064-sir . ”[126-jameson] “ [They]3812-they need to be sharp , relevant , and , most importantly , traceable . ”[0-i] [I]0-i nod . “ Okay . ”[0-i] “ [You]0-i can go , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson snaps . “ That is all . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i frown as [my]0-i eyes flick between [him]126-jameson and [Jake]158-jay . Who ’s [he]126-jameson talking to ? “ [Me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i point to [my]0-i chest . “ Yes , [you]0-i , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson snaps . “ Who else would [I]126-jameson be talking to ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i feel anger flutter in [my]0-i stomach . “ Fine . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pick up [my]0-i notepad and stand . “ [I]0-i want the stories by four o’clock each day . ”[0-i] “ Very well , ”[0-i] [I]0-i call as [I]0-i walk toward the door . “ Send [Tristan]135-tristan in , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson snaps . [I]0-i ’m not [[your]126-jameson damn secretary]1374-your damn secretary . [I]0-i open the door and fake a smile . “ Sure , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say through gritted teeth as [I]0-i close the door behind [me]0-i . [Damn rude pig]1375-damn rude pig . Who the heck does [he]126-jameson think [he]126-jameson is ? [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes in pity for [Jake]158-jay . [He]158-jay ’s going to get eaten alive in there . [Jameson Miles]126-jameson is fucking mean when [he]126-jameson ’s stressed . [I]0-i see why [he]126-jameson runs — probably keeps [him]126-jameson out of [jail]1376-jail . Who knows what would happen if [he]126-jameson did n’t exercise ? [I]0-i walk out to [the reception area]1377-the reception area and then through to the other side of [the building]412-the building , and [I]0-i knock on [Tristan]135-tristan ’s door . “ Come in , ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan calls . [I]0-i smile when [I]0-i hear how much [he]135-tristan sounds like [[his]135-tristan brother]736-his brother . [I]0-i open the door . “ [Jameson]126-jameson asked [me]0-i to . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause as [I]0-i try to make it sound nicer than how it came out . “ [He]126-jameson wants to see [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [Tristan]135-tristan smirks . “ Yes . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan stands . “ Everything okay ? ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan asks casually as [we]1380-we begin to walk back to [reception]443-reception . “ [He]135-tristan ’s . . . ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i shrug as [I]0-i try to think of a description . “ Agitated . ”[0-i] “ Hmm . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan frowns as if concerned . “ [He]135-tristan has a lot going on , but [you]0-i already know that . ”[135-tristan] “ Yes . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile as [my]0-i eyes hold [his]135-tristan . Does [he]135-tristan know ? [He]135-tristan winks as [he]135-tristan walks down [the corridor]728-the corridor toward [[Jameson]126-jameson ’s office]3491-jameson ’s office . “ Catch [you]0-i later . ”[135-tristan] What was that wink ? Was that code for “ [I]135-tristan know [you]135-tristan fuck [him]135-tristan ”[135-tristan] ? Does [he]135-tristan know [we]1384-we are back together ? Shit . [The receptionist]742-the receptionist is n’t at [her]742-the receptionist desk , and [I]0-i glance down [the hallway]1386-the hallway toward [[Jameson]126-jameson ’s office]3491-jameson ’s office . Damn it , what ’s going on in there ? The door opens . Shit , [I]0-i do n’t want [them]1388-them to see [me]0-i . [I]0-i duck behind the reception desk , and then [I]0-i hear [Jameson]126-jameson ’s sharp voice as [he]126-jameson says something , and [I]0-i wince . [Jake]158-jay storms past and gets into [the elevator]428-the elevator and hits the button with force . The doors close , and [my]0-i eyes widen as [I]0-i peer out from behind the desk . What the hell did [he]126-jameson just say ? [Jameson]126-jameson [I]0-i inhale deeply through [my]0-i nose as [I]0-i try to calm [myself]0-i down . “ For God ’s sake , [Jameson]126-jameson , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan snaps . “ Tone it down . [The poor bastard]3813-the poor bastard is doing the best [he]3813-the poor bastard can . ”[135-tristan] “ Bullshit . [He]3813-the poor bastard ’s useless . [He]3813-the poor bastard ’s been [here]275-here a week and has n’t a fucking clue what ’s going on . [He]3813-the poor bastard ’s more interested in chasing [the damn girls]3815-the damn girls around [downstairs]3304-downstairs . ”[0-i] [I]0-i go to the bar and pour [myself]0-i a scotch and then walk over to the window and stare at [the city]3381-the city below . “ It ’s ten o’clock , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan says dryly as [he]135-tristan watches [me]0-i . “ So ? ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i snap as [I]0-i sip the scotch and feel the warmth of it roll down [my]0-i throat . “ And [the damn girl]3817-the damn girl [downstairs]3304-downstairs would n’t happen to be [Emily Foster]91-emily , would it ? ”[135-tristan] “ Do n’t fucking start . ”[0-i] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . [I]0-i ’m fucking livid that [she]1391-she went out with [him]135-tristan on the weekend . “ Have [you]135-tristan got the management report ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap to change the subject . “ No , it ’s in [[my]135-tristan office]529-my office . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan heads for the door . “ [I]135-tristan ’ll go get it . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan disappears as [I]0-i stare out over [New York]3-new york . “ Hi . ”[0-i] [I]0-i hear a soft voice from behind [me]0-i . [I]0-i sigh as [my]0-i gaze stays out the window . “ Go back to work , [Emily]91-emily . ”[0-i] “ Are [you]0-i all right ? ”[1391-she] [she]1391-she says as [she]1391-she walks toward [me]0-i . “ [I]1391-she ’m fine . ”[1391-she] [I]0-i clench [my]0-i jaw to stop [myself]0-i from looking at [her]1391-she . [She]1391-she walks over and takes [my]0-i scotch from [me]0-i and goes to the sink and pours it down the drain . “ What the hell are [you]1391-she doing ? ”[1391-she] [I]0-i frown . [She]1391-she smiles up at [me]0-i and slides [her]1391-she hands under [my]0-i suit jacket and around [my]0-i waist . “ Looking after [[my]1391-she man]3820-my man . ”[1391-she] “ Do n’t tip [my]1391-she fucking drink out . ”[1391-she] “ Then do n’t drink because [you]0-i ’re stressed . [You]0-i ’re playing with fire , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[1391-she] “ [You]0-i ’re not [[my]1391-she mother]403-my mother . ”[1391-she] [She]1391-she smiles sexily and goes up onto [her]1391-she toes and kisses [me]0-i softly . [I]0-i glare at [her]1391-she . “ [I]0-i ’m furious at [you]1391-she . ”[0-i] “ [I]1391-she know . ”[1391-she] [She]1391-she kisses [me]0-i again . “ [I]1391-she was n’t going out , and then [we]3822-we had to spy on [[Aaron]110-aaron ’s boyfriend]3823-aaron ’s boyfriend because [he]3823-aaron ’s boyfriend was meeting someone there from [Grindr]175-grindr . And [Jake]158-jay turned up and would n’t stop talking to [us]3822-we . [He]158-jay ’s so annoying . ”[1391-she] [I]0-i glare at [her]1391-she . [She]1391-she smiles and snuggles into [my]0-i chest . “ [I]1391-she missed [you]0-i this weekend . ”[1391-she] [I]0-i feel [myself]0-i relax for the first time since [I]0-i dropped [her]1391-she off at [home]3076-home on Saturday . “ Do n’t miss [me]0-i , [Em]91-emily . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh . “ [I]1391-she ca n’t help it . ”[1391-she] [She]1391-she kisses [my]0-i lips , totally oblivious to anything [I]0-i ’m saying . “ If [you]0-i ’re stressed , [you]0-i go down to [the gym]3243-the gym , or [you]0-i come and get [me]1391-she . What about karate ? [I]1391-she hear that ’s amazing . ”[1391-she] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . “ Doing karate and turning into [the fucking Kung Fu Panda]3825-the fucking kung fu panda will not relieve [my]0-i stress , [Emily]91-emily . It ’s laughable that [you]91-emily think that it would . ”[0-i] “ Okay , well , hell , go for a run . [I]0-i do n’t want [you]0-i day drinking . ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap [my]0-i arm around [her]1391-she waist , unable to control [myself]0-i any longer . “ And [I]1391-she told [you]0-i [I]1391-she do n’t want [you]0-i out with [other men]3826-other men . Especially [him]3826-other men . ”[1391-she] [She]1391-she runs [her]1391-she fingers through [my]0-i stubble as [she]1391-she smiles softly . “ [You]0-i ’re [[my]1391-she only man]3827-my only man , ”[1391-she] [she]1391-she whispers up at [me]0-i . “ It ’s [you]0-i that [I]1391-she ’m thinking about . ”[1391-she] [I]0-i feel [my]0-i anger slowly leave [me]0-i as [we]1393-we kiss . “ [I]1391-she need [you]0-i tonight , ”[1391-she] [she]1391-she says softly . [God]88-god , [I]0-i need [her]1391-she too . No , stick to the rules . “ It ’s not Tuesday . ”[1391-she] “ [I]1391-she do n’t care . ”[1391-she] “ Do [you]1391-she have to disobey [me]1391-she on every single thing , [Ms. Foster]146-ms. foster ? ”[1391-she] “ Just [you]0-i wait to see how naughty [I]1391-she ’m going to be tonight , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles , ”[1391-she] [she]1391-she breathes as [I]0-i pull [her]1391-she against [me]0-i to feel [my]0-i erection . “ Ahem . ”[1391-she] A voice sounds at the door , and [we]1393-we both look up , startled . [Emily]91-emily jumps back from [me]0-i . “ [Tristan]135-tristan , ”[1391-she] [she]1391-she splutters . “ [I]1391-she was just . . . ”[1391-she] [Her]1391-she eyes flick between [him]1394-him and [me]0-i . “ [I]135-tristan mean , [I]135-tristan . . . ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan chuckles . “ Do [you]1391-she want [me]135-tristan to leave ? ”[135-tristan] “ No , ”[1391-she] [she]1391-she stammers . “ [I]1391-she ’m leaving . ”[1391-she] [She]1391-she practically runs for the door . “ Ah , um , goodbye . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk as [I]0-i watch [her]1391-she face turn a deep crimson . [Tristan]135-tristan already knows — [we]1395-we tell [each other]351-each other everything . “ Goodbye , [Ms. Foster]146-ms. foster . [I]135-tristan shall send [the car]422-the car for [you]1391-she at seven . ”[135-tristan] [She]1391-she nods in embarrassment and scurries from [the office]444-the office , and [I]0-i smile after [her]1391-she . [Tristan]135-tristan ’s eyes hold [mine]0-i for a moment . “ [She]1391-she ’s good for [you]0-i . ”[135-tristan] “ That ’s debatable . ”[91-emily] [Emily]91-emily [I]0-i smile broadly at the closed elevator doors in front of [me]0-i . It worked . [I]0-i wanted to calm [him]135-tristan down , and it worked . [He]135-tristan ’s a mirror . If [I]0-i ’m calm , [he]135-tristan ’s calm . Maybe if [I]0-i ’m honest , [he]135-tristan ’ll be honest , and [I]0-i do n’t know what that means for [my]0-i little hard - to - get act , but [I]0-i guess [I]0-i ’ll find out soon enough . [He]135-tristan did n’t seem annoyed when [I]0-i told [him]135-tristan [I]0-i missed [him]135-tristan — [he]135-tristan actually seemed relieved . Or maybe that ’s just wishful thinking on [my]0-i part . [I]0-i get back to [my]0-i floor , and [my]0-i eyes scan [the room]613-the room as [I]0-i walk back to [my]0-i desk . [Somebody working here]1399-somebody working here , alongside [me]0-i , is [a thief]1400-a thief . [They]1399-somebody working here ’re stealing from [the Miles family]1401-the miles family ; [the company]3166-the company ’s value is plummeting , and [[my]0-i [Jay]158-jay]1403-my jay is stressed beyond belief . [I]0-i wish [I]0-i could talk to [Molly]111-molly and [Aaron]110-aaron about this . [I]0-i ’m sure if [we]1404-we brainstormed together , [we]1404-we could come up with more than [Jake]158-jay has . [I]0-i ca n’t ; [I]0-i gave [them]1399-somebody working here [my]0-i word [I]0-i would n’t tell [a soul]3440-a soul . [I]0-i take a seat back at [my]0-i desk . “ How did it go ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron asks . “ Fine , ”[0-i] [I]0-i lie . “ It ’s blatantly obvious that [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles has a thing for [you]111-molly . ”[0-i] [Molly]111-molly smirks . “ Why is it ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [We]3829-we never got this kind of specialized training program . ”[0-i] [Her]111-molly eyes flick to [Aaron]110-aaron . “ Did [we]3829-we ? ”[111-molly] “ Nope , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron replies as [his]110-aaron eyes stay glued to [his]110-aaron computer . “ Please tell [me]0-i [you]111-molly are secretly going up there to suck [his]110-aaron dick . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk but stay silent . [Molly]111-molly ’s eyes come to [me]0-i in question . “ Are [you]111-molly ? ”[111-molly] [I]0-i shrug . [I]0-i ca n’t lie to [them]1406-them ; [I]0-i just wo n’t elaborate . “ What the fuck ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron whispers as [he]110-aaron rolls [his]110-aaron chair over to [mine]0-i ; [Molly]111-molly , too , rolls [her]111-molly chair over next to [mine]0-i . “ [You]111-molly have seen [him]110-aaron ? ”[111-molly] “ Possibly . ”[111-molly] “ What the fuck ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly whispers . “ When ? ”[111-molly] “ A few times , but Friday night was the last time [I]110-aaron saw [him]110-aaron . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron does a cross over [his]110-aaron chest and pretends to pray . “ Thank [you]0-i , [Jesus]150-jesus . ”[110-aaron] “ But do n’t say anything , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ It ’s just very casual , nothing to get excited about yet . ”[0-i] [Molly]111-molly ’s eyes widen in exasperation . “ Are [you]0-i kidding [me]111-molly ? [Screwing Jameson Miles]126-jameson is something to get excited about , [woman]3347-woman . Have [you]0-i seen [him]110-aaron ? ”[111-molly] [I]0-i smile broadly at [their]1407-their over - the - top reactions . “ [I]0-i ’m just playing it cool , but [I]0-i am going up there for a project with [Tristan]135-tristan and not to see [Jay]158-jay . ”[0-i] That ’s not lying — it is true . . . ish . [Aaron]110-aaron puts [his]110-aaron hand over [his]110-aaron chest . “ Oh hell , [she]111-molly calls [him]110-aaron [Jay]158-jay . Be still [my]110-aaron beating heart . ”[110-aaron] “ Kill [me]111-molly now . ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly sighs dreamily . “ Have [you]0-i been to [[his]110-aaron apartment]3362-his apartment ? ”[111-molly] “ Uh - huh , and [he]110-aaron spent the night at [mine]111-molly . ”[1407-their] [Their]1407-their eyes widen . “ [He]110-aaron came to [[your]111-molly house]3402-your house ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron shrieks . “ Shh , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i look at [the people around [us]1409-us]645-the people around us . “ Keep it down , and [you]0-i ca n’t tell [a soul]3440-a soul . Especially not [Ava]112-ava — [you]0-i know what [she]112-ava ’s like . ”[0-i] “ Oh God , can [you]111-molly imagine ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly rolls [her]111-molly eyes . “ [She]112-ava ’ll be [[your]0-i new bestie]3834-your new bestie if [she]112-ava knows [you]0-i are with [him]3835-he . [She]112-ava ’ll be stuck to [you]0-i like glue if there ’s a chance [she]112-ava will get to [[his]3835-he brothers]3208-his brothers . ”[111-molly] “ Well , [she]112-ava ca n’t have [Tristan]135-tristan . ”[0-i] [I]0-i tut as [I]0-i turn on [my]0-i computer . “ [He]3835-he ’s way too nice for [her]112-ava . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug . “ [He]3835-he ’s taken , anyway , [I]0-i think . ”[0-i] [We]1410-we begin to work , and [Aaron]110-aaron ’s phone rings . “ It ’s [Paul]131-paul , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron stammers in a panic . “ [Decline]179-decline , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say without looking up . “ But [I]110-aaron want to see what [he]110-aaron has to say . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron picks up the phone , and [Molly]111-molly snatches it from [him]110-aaron and hits decline . “ [He]110-aaron says ‘ fuck [me]111-molly on Grindr ’ to [the whole world]3837-the whole world . Will [you]0-i stop being pathetic ? Kick [this asshole]600-this asshole to the curb , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly snaps . [Aaron]110-aaron ’s shoulders slump sadly . [I]0-i rub [his]110-aaron back in sympathy . “ It will get easier , [babe]3279-babe . ”[0-i] “ Yeah , when [we]3840-we set fire to [his]110-aaron sleazy ball sack , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly whispers angrily . [I]0-i giggle . “ Set fire to [his]110-aaron sleazy ball sack — [you]110-aaron speak with such articulation , [Moll]111-molly . ”[0-i] “ [I]111-molly know , right ? This is why [I]111-molly ’m [a reporter]3450-a reporter . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly stands . “ [I]111-molly ’m going to make [us]3840-we coffee . [You]3840-we both want one ? ”[111-molly] “ Uh - huh . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron blows out a deflated breath . “ Can [you]111-molly find [us]3840-we some cake too ? Surely it ’s [somebody]271-somebody ’s birthday around here . ”[110-aaron] [Molly]111-molly looks around . “ Yep , where ’s [that Uber guy]3843-that uber guy when [we]3840-we need [him]3843-that uber guy ? ”[111-molly] [Her]111-molly eyes come to [me]0-i . “ Oh [my]111-molly God , was that cheesecake last week sent from [Jameson]126-jameson ? ”[111-molly] [I]0-i smile broadly . [Aaron]110-aaron puts [his]110-aaron head down and pretends to hit it on the desk . “ [He]3843-that uber guy even sends cheesecakes . [The man]265-the man is [a for real fucking god]3845-a for real fucking god . ”[110-aaron] Buzz goes [my]0-i door buzzer . “ Hello . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ Hello , [Ms. Foster]146-ms. foster . This is [Alan]152-alan , [[Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles ’s driver]3846-mr. miles ’s driver . ”[0-i] [My]0-i face falls . “ Oh . Is everything all right ? ”[0-i] “ Yes , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles asked [me]0-i to collect [you]0-i and take [you]0-i to [[his]114-mr. miles apartment]3362-his apartment . [He]114-mr. miles ’s been delayed on a conference call and will be joining [you]0-i shortly . ”[0-i] “ Oh , okay . [I]0-i ’m on [my]0-i way . ”[0-i] [I]0-i grab [my]0-i overnight bag that [I]0-i packed , and with one last look around [[my]0-i apartment]940-my apartment , [I]0-i head [downstairs]3304-downstairs . [I]0-i walk out onto [the curb]1413-the curb to see [the driver in [his]1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo customary black suit standing next to [the limo]811-the limo]1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo . “ Hello , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say nervously as [I]0-i approach [him]1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo . “ Hello . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i ’m [Emily]91-emily . ”[0-i] [I]0-i hold out [my]0-i hand , embarrassed that [I]0-i have n’t introduced [myself]0-i before now . “ [I]1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo ’m [Alan]152-alan . ”[1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo] [He]1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo smiles warmly as [we]1416-we shake hands . “ Are [you]0-i ready ? ”[1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo] “ Yes . ”[1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo] [He]1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo opens the door , and [I]0-i climb into the back of [the car]422-the car . [He]1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo closes the door , and [we]1416-we drive through the [New York]3-new york night . This does n’t seem real — [me]0-i sitting in the back of [a limo]1418-a limo being driven to [[Jameson]126-jameson ’s apartment]1419-jameson ’s apartment by [[his]1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo driver]892-his driver . [We]1416-we get to [[his]1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo building]1421-his building , and [he]1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo stops in [the pull - up area]1422-the pull - up area and opens the door . “ [I]1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo ’ll take [you]0-i up . ”[1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo] [He]1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo goes to take [my]0-i bag from [me]0-i . “ It ’s okay . [I]1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo ’ve got it . Thank [you]0-i anyway . ”[1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo] [He]1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo frowns . [I]0-i see [his]1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo disappointment . “ Unless [you]1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo want to carry it , ”[0-i] [I]0-i splutter . “ Thank [you]0-i . ”[0-i] [He]1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo smiles as [he]1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo takes it from [me]0-i . “ [I]1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo would prefer to . ”[1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo] Jeez . [He]1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo got offended that [I]0-i wanted to carry [my]0-i own bag . What is [this alternate universe]1339-this alternate universe ? [We]1424-we get into [the swanky elevator]1425-the swanky elevator , and [the attendant]301-the attendant already knows what floor to take [me]0-i to . [He]1414-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo must know [Alan]152-alan . [I]0-i hold [my]0-i breath , nervous as [we]1424-we ride in silence . [We]1424-we get to the floor , and [I]0-i tentatively follow [Alan]152-alan as [he]152-alan opens the door . “ [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles should n’t be long . [He]114-mr. miles ’s still at [the office]444-the office . [His]114-mr. miles call is going longer than [he]114-mr. miles expected . ”[152-alan] “ Thank [you]152-alan . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ Can [I]0-i get [you]152-alan anything else ? ”[0-i] “ No , all good . ”[152-alan] With a courteous nod , [he]152-alan closes the door and leaves [me]0-i alone . [I]0-i turn to see the lamps strategically on , creating a breathtaking canvas to the view . The twinkling lights over [New York]3-new york are nothing short of spectacular . [I]0-i take [my]0-i phone out and snap some pictures . [I]0-i could n’t be such a fangirl when [he]152-alan is [here]275-here . [I]0-i walk into [the bedroom]925-the bedroom and put [my]0-i bag into the empty [walk - in closet]1429-walk - in closet , and then [I]0-i walk into [his]152-alan . Suits and business shirts are strategically lined up , and there are rows and rows of expensive polished shoes . [I]0-i run [my]0-i hand over the sleeves of the suits as [I]0-i look around . [I]0-i open the top drawer of the dresser , and [I]0-i smile at [his]152-alan over - the - top organization . [His]152-alan ties are all rolled and displayed as if this is [a luxury [men]426-men ’s boutique]1430-a luxury men ’s boutique . Watches . . . [I]0-i count them . Ten expensive watches are lined up . And then [I]0-i see something rolled up next to [his]152-alan watches . [My]0-i heart stops when [I]0-i see the initials . E.F. [My]0-i scarf . [He]152-alan kept it . Not only did [he]152-alan keep it , but it ’s also with [his]152-alan special things . [I]0-i pick it up and hold it in [my]0-i hands as [I]0-i stare at it . [My]0-i eyes close , and [I]0-i inhale deeply ; the faint smell of [my]0-i perfume still lingers . [I]0-i did n’t imagine it back then . [He]152-alan was right there with [me]0-i . [I]0-i smile broadly and put the scarf back where it was and carefully close the drawer . [I]0-i do n’t know what to do with this information , but [I]0-i ’m pretty damn pleased with [my]0-i find . [My]0-i heart is racing . [He]152-alan kept it . [I]0-i walk through [the apartment]3531-the apartment as [I]0-i look around . [I]0-i run [my]0-i hand over the heavy marble countertops in [the kitchen]818-the kitchen and smile at the sheer luxury of [the place]1434-the place . [I]0-i wonder if [he]152-alan has eaten . [I]0-i open the fridge , but it ’s surprisingly sparse . There is chicken and a few ingredients . [I]0-i open the pantry and find some other things . [I]0-i glance at the wine fridge and frown — it ’s full . Of course it is . How often does [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles have a liquid dinner ? Hmm , [I]0-i need to get a grip on this stress of [his]152-alan . [I]0-i pour [myself]0-i a glass of wine , take out the ingredients , and look through the cupboards to find the pots and pans and chopping boards and knives . [I]0-i search Spotify on [my]0-i phone and put on some chill music . [I]0-i begin to chop the chicken with a huge goofy smile on [my]0-i face . [He]152-alan kept [my]0-i scarf . Forty - five minutes later , [I]0-i hear the front door open . “ [Em]91-emily ? ”[152-alan] [he]152-alan calls . “ In [the kitchen]818-the kitchen . ”[152-alan] “ Hmm . . . something smells good . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan kisses [me]0-i and wraps [his]152-alan arms around [me]0-i from behind . “ What are [you]152-alan cooking ? ”[152-alan] “ Fuck bunny stew . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan laughs loudly , and it ’s a beautiful sound . It does things to [my]0-i insides . “ Does [[your]0-i mother]3144-your mother know [you]0-i ’re [a cannibal]3851-a cannibal ? ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan kisses [my]0-i cheek from behind . [I]0-i giggle as [I]0-i stir the pot . “ No , and do n’t tell [her]3144-your mother . ”[0-i] “ [You]0-i did n’t need to cook . [I]152-alan would have taken [you]0-i out . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan pours [himself]152-alan a glass of wine . “ It ’s Monday . ”[152-alan] [I]0-i frown . “ And ? ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan sips [his]152-alan wine . “ [You]0-i do n’t go out to dinner on a school night . ”[152-alan] “ [I]152-alan go out every night . ”[152-alan] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ [You]152-alan eat out every night ? ”[0-i] “ Yeah , of course . Why ? ”[0-i] [My]0-i mouth falls open , and [I]0-i put [my]0-i hand on [my]0-i hip . “ [Jameson Miles]126-jameson , [you]152-alan have more money than sense . How do [you]152-alan relax if [you]152-alan go out to dinner every night ? ”[0-i] “ [I]152-alan sit in [a restaurant]927-a restaurant and eat . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan shrugs . “ It ’s really quite easy . ”[152-alan] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes in disgust as [I]0-i keep stirring . “ Are [you]152-alan hungry ? ”[0-i] “ Starving . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan takes [me]0-i in [his]152-alan arms and stares down at [me]0-i . “ Did [you]152-alan really miss [me]152-alan over the weekend ? ”[152-alan] [I]0-i go up onto [my]0-i toes and kiss [his]152-alan big beautiful lips . “ [I]152-alan did , actually . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan holds [me]0-i tight . “ This is where [you]152-alan tell [me]0-i that [you]152-alan missed [me]0-i too , ”[0-i] [I]0-i mutter dryly into [his]152-alan shoulder . “ [I]0-i do n’t miss [people]267-people . ”[0-i] “ Ugh , ”[0-i] [I]0-i huff as [I]0-i pull out of [his]152-alan arms and go back to stirring the dinner . “ Can [you]152-alan go out of [the room]613-the room so [I]0-i can drug [your]152-alan food now ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [I]152-alan plan on robbing [[your]0-i place]3752-your place . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan chuckles . “ Only if [you]0-i promise to take advantage of [my]152-alan body while [I]152-alan ’m sleeping . ”[152-alan] [I]0-i giggle . “ Deal . ”[0-i] [I]0-i dish up [our]1435-our dinner , and [we]1435-our take seats at the kitchen counter . [I]0-i hold [my]0-i breath as [he]152-alan takes [his]152-alan first bite . “ Hmm , delicious , ”[152-alan] [he]152-alan hums . [I]0-i smile proudly . “ [A fuck bunny who cooks]3856-a fuck bunny who cooks . ”[0-i] [He]152-alan smirks around a forkful of food . “ [I]152-alan love to cook . It ’s [my]152-alan hobby . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan frowns and watches [me]0-i for a moment . “ [I]152-alan ’ve never met anyone quite like [you]0-i , [Emily]91-emily . ”[152-alan] “ Why ? ”[152-alan] “ [I]152-alan do n’t know . [I]152-alan ca n’t put [my]152-alan finger on it . [You]0-i ’re very . . . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan pauses as [he]152-alan thinks of the right word . “ Unaffected . ”[152-alan] “ Unaffected by what ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk as [I]0-i eat . [He]152-alan shrugs . “ [New York]3-new york . ”[152-alan] “ [You]152-alan ’ve never had [a girlfriend who cooked for [you]152-alan before]3857-a girlfriend who cooked for you before ? ”[152-alan] “ [I]152-alan ’ve only ever had one serious relationship , and [she]3857-a girlfriend who cooked for you before was [a workaholic like [me]152-alan]3858-a workaholic like me . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan shrugs . “ [We]3859-we would both get [home]3076-home too late from work . Eating out was easier . ”[152-alan] [I]0-i sip [my]0-i wine as [I]0-i stare at [him]152-alan . [I]0-i would love to blurt out a million questions about [her]1436-her . . . but [I]0-i wo n’t . [I]0-i ’ll play it cool . [He]152-alan moves to get [his]152-alan wine , and [he]152-alan winces . “ What ’s wrong ? ”[152-alan] “ [My]152-alan back ’s tight . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan stands and twists [his]152-alan upper body to stretch . “ [Somebody]271-somebody insisted on [me]152-alan firing [my]152-alan masseuse . ”[152-alan] “ Oh , [her]1436-her , ”[0-i] [I]0-i scoff . “ Do n’t ruin [my]0-i night . [I]0-i ’ll find [you]152-alan [a new masseuse]3862-a new masseuse tomorrow . ”[0-i] [He]152-alan stretches some more . “ Please do . ”[152-alan] “ Why does [your]152-alan back get so tight ? ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan sits back down . “ When [I]152-alan get wound up , [my]152-alan back tightens . ”[152-alan] “ What else happens when [you]152-alan get wound up ? ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan chews [his]152-alan food as if contemplating [his]152-alan answer . “ [My]152-alan temper gets the best of [me]152-alan . ”[152-alan] [I]0-i smile broadly . “ What ? ”[0-i] [He]152-alan smirks . “ All this time [I]152-alan thought [you]152-alan were [an asshole]785-an asshole , when really [you]152-alan were just stressed out ? ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan chuckles . “ And what ’s [your]152-alan excuse for being [a bitch]3394-a bitch ? ”[152-alan] [I]0-i sip [my]0-i wine . “ Nothing . [I]152-alan really am just [a bitch]3394-a bitch . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan holds [his]152-alan glass up to clink it with [mine]0-i . [His]152-alan eyes have a tender glow to them . “ Thank [you]0-i for dinner . It ’s delicious . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan leans over and kisses [me]0-i . “ Like [you]0-i . ”[152-alan] [I]0-i remember something . “ Oh , and [you]0-i will be pleased to know , [I]0-i brought [my]0-i workout gear so [I]0-i can come running in the morning . ”[0-i] “ [You]0-i did ? ”[152-alan] [he]152-alan asks in surprise . “ Uh - huh . ”[152-alan] “ [I]0-i run fast . ”[0-i] “ Good , because [I]152-alan walk slow . ”[152-alan] A few hours later [we]1437-we both laugh out loud into the darkness . “ [You]0-i did not , ”[152-alan] [he]152-alan says . [I]0-i giggle . “ Uh - huh . ”[0-i] It ’s late , and [we]1437-we are lying in bed , facing [each other]351-each other , and talking after making love . “ What on earth ? ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan rubs [his]152-alan hand up over [my]0-i stomach and then breast as [he]152-alan listens . [His]152-alan face is alight with mischief . “ How ? ”[152-alan] “ Well . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i think for a moment . “ It was [[my]0-i first car]3866-my first car , and [I]0-i ’d only had it a week . [I]0-i was driving with [[my]0-i friend]3515-my friend , and the day was as hot as hell . [We]1437-we were on [our]1437-we way to buy some cheap jeans from [a market]3868-a market , and the temperature gauge started overheating . ”[0-i] [He]152-alan smiles as [he]152-alan listens . “ [We]1437-we pulled into [a service station]3869-a service station , and [I]152-alan called [[my]152-alan dad]3870-my dad , and [he]3870-my dad told [me]152-alan to put oil in it . ”[152-alan] [I]0-i shrug . “ But [we]1437-we did n’t know where the oil went , so [we]1437-we assumed it went in the little hole that [you]152-alan measure it from . ”[0-i] “ The dipstick ? ”[152-alan] [he]152-alan gasps in disbelief . “ How on earth did [you]152-alan get it in there ? ”[152-alan] [I]0-i laugh . This is the most ridiculous story [I]0-i ever heard of . “ [We]1437-we borrowed a funnel and then poured it in , and it overflowed everywhere . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shake [my]0-i head as [I]0-i remember it as clear as day . “ [We]1437-we thought it was fine and started driving , and then oil [we]1437-we ’d spilled on the engine caught on fire . ”[0-i] [His]152-alan eyes widen . “ What happened ? ”[152-alan] “ [[My]1439-my beloved five - hundred - dollar car that [I]1439-my saved up for a year for]3871-my beloved five - hundred - dollar car that i saved up for a year for was frigging totaled in just one week ; that ’s what happened . ”[1439-my] [We]1439-my both laugh and then eventually fall silent . [I]0-i lean onto [my]0-i elbow as [I]0-i look over at [the gorgeous naked man beside [me]0-i]1440-the gorgeous naked man beside me . “ [You]0-i must have done something stupid in [your]0-i life , [Jameson Miles]126-jameson . ”[0-i] [He]152-alan smiles softly over at [me]0-i in the darkness . “ Yeah . [I]152-alan have . ”[152-alan] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk . [He]152-alan reaches over and cups [my]0-i face in [his]152-alan hand , and [his]152-alan thumb dusts over [my]0-i bottom lip . “ [I]152-alan never asked for [your]0-i number . ”[152-alan] Chapter 14 “ Will [you]0-i hurry up , [woman]3347-woman ? ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson calls from [his]126-jameson running position up in front . [I]0-i ’m panting for dear life as [I]0-i try to keep up . Oh hell , [he]126-jameson ’s trying to kill [me]0-i . “ What ’s the rush ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson turns around and runs back to [me]0-i . [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i watch [him]126-jameson . “ [God]88-god , [you]0-i ’re so perky and energetic in the morning . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson laughs and sprints off as [I]0-i keep shuffling along . [I]0-i watch [him]126-jameson do a loop so that [he]126-jameson can still see [me]0-i , and then [he]126-jameson sprints back . “ How do [you]0-i run so fast ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson jogs backward in front of [me]0-i as [we]1441-we talk . “ Well , what [I]126-jameson do is [I]126-jameson imagine [someone]401-someone is chasing [me]126-jameson with an ax . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson ’s hardly even out of breath . “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ Are [you]126-jameson kidding [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson shakes [his]126-jameson head with a cheeky grin . “ [Your]0-i relaxation tool is to imagine [someone]401-someone is chasing [you]0-i with a fucking ax . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson laughs as [he]126-jameson jogs backward . “ It works . [I]126-jameson run much faster that way . ”[126-jameson] “ This is all making sense now , ”[0-i] [I]0-i puff . “ The puzzle is falling into place here . ”[0-i] “ What puzzle ? ”[126-jameson] “ [Your]0-i back is tight because [[your]0-i masseuse]3581-your masseuse continually puts it out so [she]3581-your masseuse can fuck [you]0-i again . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson grins . “ [Your]0-i relaxation exercise is to be chased by [an ax murderer]3876-an ax murderer . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson laughs . “ And [you]0-i go out seven nights a week . No wonder [you]0-i ’re stressed out , [[you]0-i crazy bastard]3877-you crazy bastard . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson pulls [me]0-i to [him]126-jameson by [my]0-i T - shirt and kisses [me]0-i on the lips . “ Lucky [I]126-jameson have [you]0-i to fuck [me]126-jameson calm , then , is n’t it ? ”[126-jameson] “ Damn straight , ”[0-i] [I]0-i pant . [We]1442-we need to stop talking . [I]0-i ca n’t run and talk at the same time . What kind of [Olympic athlete]1443-olympic athlete does [he]126-jameson think [I]0-i am ? “ What exercise would [you]126-jameson recommend [I]126-jameson do ? For relaxing , [I]126-jameson mean , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks as [he]126-jameson falls in to jog beside [me]0-i slowly . [I]0-i think for a moment . “ Aqua aerobics . ”[126-jameson] “ Ha . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson laughs . “ [I]126-jameson ’m not that old . ”[126-jameson] “ [You]126-jameson ’re pretty old , ”[0-i] [I]0-i pant . “ Do [you]126-jameson want to race [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] “ No . ”[126-jameson] “ Why not ? ”[126-jameson] “ Because [that murderer]3878-that murderer has [his]3878-that murderer ax in [my]126-jameson lungs , and [I]126-jameson ’m about to die at any second . [I]126-jameson hope [you]0-i know resuscitation . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson chuckles . “ [Wimp]3879-wimp . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson takes off at high speed , and [I]0-i shuffle along and smile as [I]0-i watch [him]126-jameson loop [Central Park]22-central park as [he]126-jameson always keeps [me]0-i in sight . [Jameson Miles]126-jameson is extremely fit . . . and extremely hot . And luckily for [me]0-i , [I]0-i ’m [[his]126-jameson fuck bunny]1444-his fuck bunny . [I]0-i stand in [the foyer]799-the foyer as [I]0-i wait for [Ava]112-ava and [Molly]111-molly . [We]1446-we ’re just going on [our]1446-we lunch break , and [Molly]111-molly is talking to [one of [the security guards]1448-the security guards]1447-one of the security guards . [I]0-i think [she]111-molly ’s a little sweet on [him]1447-one of the security guards . “ [You]112-ava coming out this weekend ? ”[112-ava] [Ava]112-ava asks . “ Um , [I]112-ava ’m not sure what [I]112-ava ’m doing yet . [I]112-ava might be going [home]3076-home . ”[112-ava] Jeez , [I]0-i do n’t really want to go out with [her]111-molly again . [She]111-molly ’s only interested in [men]426-men if [they]426-men have money . That ’s just so left field for [me]0-i that [I]0-i ca n’t deal with it . One of [the elevators]1450-the elevators opens , and [Tristan]135-tristan steps out and then [Jameson]126-jameson . [They]1451-they have [two other men]1452-two other men with [them]1451-they . Wearing a navy suit and a crisp white shirt , [he]126-jameson is the epitome of [gorgeous man]1453-gorgeous man . Dark hair , square jaw , and those piercing blue eyes . It ’s hard to believe that just six hours ago , [he]126-jameson was deep inside [my]0-i body in the shower . [He]126-jameson took [me]0-i twice when [we]1454-we got [home]3076-home from [our]1454-we run this morning . [The man]265-the man ’s an animal . [His]265-the man dick is out of [this world]1457-this world . [I]0-i ’ve died and gone to [CEO heaven]35-ceo heaven . “ Oh my God , ”[112-ava] [Ava]112-ava whispers . “ Look who ’s coming . ”[112-ava] [Jameson]126-jameson is deep in conversation with [the men]434-the men as [the four of [them]434-the men]1009-the four of them stride through [the crowded foyer]1460-the crowded foyer . [Everyone]3098-everyone stops and stares . [I]0-i stand still as [he]126-jameson walks past , and at the last moment [he]126-jameson glances up and catches sight of [me]0-i . [His]126-jameson step falters , and [I]0-i give [him]126-jameson a subtle shake of [my]0-i head . [I]0-i do n’t want [anyone]295-anyone to know about [us]1463-we . [He]126-jameson nods once as if in understanding and keeps walking as [he]126-jameson falls back into [his]126-jameson conversation . [We]1463-we watch as [they]434-the men leave through the front doors and disappear up [the street]654-the street . [They]434-the men must be going out for lunch . “ Seriously , where do [we]1463-we find [men like [the Miles brothers]3570-the miles brothers]3881-men like the miles brothers ? ”[112-ava] [Ava]112-ava sighs . “ Right ? ”[112-ava] [I]0-i watch [the street]654-the street [they]434-the men disappeared up . “ One of these days , ”[112-ava] [she]112-ava whispers . “ One of these days . ”[112-ava] [I]0-i wonder if [Jameson]126-jameson had a long and boozy lunch , and more importantly , did [he]126-jameson bring back cake ? It ’s getting to that time of the day where [my]0-i mind is fixed firmly on something sweet to have with [my]0-i coffee . “ Hi , [Emily]91-emily , have [you]91-emily got [your]91-emily stories [we]3883-we are running with tomorrow ? ”[113-hayden] [Hayden]113-hayden asks . [I]0-i smile up at [him]113-hayden . Hmm . “ [I]0-i did n’t think [they]1466-them were due until four , and it ’s only three . ”[0-i] [Hayden]113-hayden is the person who [I]0-i turn the news in to , and [he]113-hayden then passes [them]1466-them on to the next stage . “ [I]113-hayden know , but [I]113-hayden like to get a head start , ”[113-hayden] [he]113-hayden says casually . Head start on what ? Is [he]113-hayden [the one selling the stories]1467-the one selling the stories ? Is that why [he]113-hayden wants them early , so [he]113-hayden can get them off to [the highest bidder]1468-the highest bidder ? “ [They]1466-them ’re not ready yet . ”[113-hayden] “ Okay , cool . ”[113-hayden] [He]113-hayden smiles . “ Email [them]1466-them over as soon as [you]0-i get [them]1466-them sorted . ”[113-hayden] [My]0-i eyes hold [his]113-hayden . “ Sure . ”[113-hayden] [I]0-i watch [him]113-hayden walk back to [his]113-hayden desk and fall into conversation with [the person who sits next to [him]113-hayden]1469-the person who sits next to him . [I]0-i ’m watching [you]1470-you , [asshole]3711-asshole . [I]0-i look around [the office]444-the office with renewed determination . [I]0-i ’m watching all of [you]1470-you . Every single one . It ’s just now four , and [I]0-i email [Jameson]126-jameson . Hi , [I]0-i booked [you]1470-you a massage with a physio . [They]1473-they will be at [[your]1470-you place]3752-your place at seven . Hope this suits [your]1470-you plans . FB xoxoxo A few moments later , a reply bounces back . [Dear FB]180-dear fb , Please define “ [they]1473-they . ”[180-dear fb] J xx [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . [I]0-i knew this was coming . [Dear Mr. J]160-mr. j , [They]1473-they . . . aka . . . [male physiotherapist professional , nonsexual - act - performing masseuse]1475-male physiotherapist professional , nonsexual - act - performing masseuse . Specializes in back treatment and hella expensive . [FB xoxoxo]180-dear fb [I]0-i wait for a few moments , and a reply bounces back . FB , Fine , can [you]1470-you let [them]1473-they into [[my]0-i apartment]940-my apartment , please ? [I]0-i ’ll have [Alan]152-alan pick [you]1470-you up at seven . [I]0-i ’ll meet [you]1470-you [there]3073-there , maybe fifteen minutes late . J xox [I]0-i smile broadly as hope blooms in [my]0-i chest . [I]0-i write back . Are [we]1478-we seeing [each other]351-each other tonight ? [He]1480-he replies . Yes . [I]0-i ’m away for the week next week , therefore , [I]0-i ’m taking next week ’s meetings too . See [you]1470-you tonight . [Jay xox]158-jay [I]0-i probably should play a little hard to get and pretend [I]0-i have something going on . . . but [I]0-i just do n’t have it in [me]0-i . [I]0-i email back . [Jay]158-jay , [I]0-i ’ll make dinner . What do [you]158-jay want ? FB xoxo A reply bounces back . The only thing [I]0-i want to eat tonight is [you]1470-you . Now get back to work before [I]0-i bend [you]1470-you over [your]1470-you desk . xox [I]0-i smirk as [I]0-i feel [my]0-i face flush , and [I]0-i click out of [my]0-i emails . [He]158-jay is undoubtedly [the hottest man on earth]1481-the hottest man on earth . [I]0-i feel like [a master chef in [[Jameson]126-jameson ’s fancy kitchen]1483-jameson ’s fancy kitchen]1482-a master chef in jameson ’s fancy kitchen . It ’s just now seven , and [I]0-i turn the gas on and lift the pot of water onto it . [I]0-i like having dinner ready for [him]158-jay . [I]0-i know [he]158-jay ’s never had it , so it feels special to do it for [him]158-jay . The security buzzer sounds , and [I]0-i look around . Shit . Where ’s the intercom ? [I]0-i see a phone and screen near the front door . [I]0-i pick up . “ Hello ? ”[0-i] “ Hello , this is [Matthew]154-matthew , [the physio]3884-the physio . [I]0-i ’m here for a massage therapy session . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i stare at the screen . [Matthew]154-matthew is good looking , has the whole Scandinavian thing going on . “ Come up . ”[0-i] [I]0-i push the button and release the door for [him]154-matthew , and [he]154-matthew disappears into [the elevator]428-the elevator . Moments later , [he]154-matthew knocks on the door . “ Hello . ”[154-matthew] [I]0-i smile . “ Hi . ”[154-matthew] [He]154-matthew walks in wearing a white uniform and carrying a fold - up massage bed . Wow . . . [Matthew]154-matthew is really hot . Maybe [I]0-i should get a massage too ? “ Where do [you]0-i want [me]154-matthew to set up ? ”[154-matthew] [he]154-matthew asks . “ Umm . ”[154-matthew] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i look around . Where do [I]0-i want [him]154-matthew to set up ? “ Just hang on a minute . ”[0-i] [I]0-i walk down [the hallway]1386-the hallway and peer into [the rooms]924-the rooms . There ’s [a room at the end with a treadmill and weight bench]1487-a room at the end with a treadmill and weight bench . “ Just down here at the end , please . ”[154-matthew] [He]154-matthew saunters down with [his]154-matthew sexy walk and begins to set up . Suddenly [I]0-i ’m reminded that this is the exact scenario that [Jameson]126-jameson had with [Chloe]151-chloe . . . only [they]1488-they really did have sex . [My]0-i stomach rolls at the thought . Stop it . “ [I]0-i ’ll be out here if [you]126-jameson need [me]0-i . ”[0-i] [I]0-i walk nervously back out into [the kitchen]818-the kitchen . Shit , is it safe to leave [him]154-matthew down there alone ? Should [I]0-i be watching [him]154-matthew or something ? [I]0-i peer back down [the hall]729-the hall to make sure [he]154-matthew does n’t come out of [that room]1491-that room and snoop around . Oh , damn it , what ’s the protocol with [strangers]3678-strangers in [a place like this]934-a place like this ? The front door clicks , and [Jameson]126-jameson comes into view . “ Hello , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says flatly . [I]0-i smile . “ Hi . ”[0-i] [I]0-i wrap [my]0-i arms around [him]126-jameson . “ How ’s [[my]0-i man]3820-my man ? ”[0-i] “ Fine . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson brushes past [me]0-i in a rush . Oh . [I]0-i frown . That ’s not the greeting [I]0-i was hoping for . “ Is [he]3820-my man [here]275-here yet ? ”[0-i] “ Yes , in [the room]613-the room down at the end . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i ’ll just have a quick shower . Can [you]0-i tell [him]3820-my man [I]0-i ’ll be five minutes , please ? ”[0-i] “ Sure . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson disappears into [the bedroom]925-the bedroom , and [I]0-i walk back down [the hall]729-the hall . “ [Jameson]126-jameson is just taking a quick shower . [He]126-jameson will only be a few minutes . ”[0-i] “ Okay , thanks . ”[154-matthew] [Matthew]154-matthew smiles . [I]0-i walk back out into [the kitchen]818-the kitchen and stir the vegetables [I]0-i have cooking . Maybe [I]0-i should have stayed at [[my]0-i place]3652-my place tonight . [He]126-jameson did n’t seem too pleased to see [me]0-i . Ten minutes later warm hands come around [my]0-i waist from behind , and [Jameson]126-jameson ’s lips find [my]0-i temple . “ Hey , [babe]3279-babe , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers softly . [I]0-i turn to find [him]126-jameson with a white towel around [his]126-jameson waist . “ Everything all right ? ”[126-jameson] “ Yeah , [I]126-jameson ’m just really tired . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson exhales heavily . “ The last thing [I]126-jameson feel like is a fucking massage , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers as [he]126-jameson holds [his]126-jameson cheek to [mine]0-i . “ [You]126-jameson ’ll feel much better after it , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say . “ Massage , dinner , and bed . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson rolls [his]126-jameson eyes and trudges up [the hall]729-the hall . [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i listen . Every time [Jameson]126-jameson inhales , [he]126-jameson gives a slight snore . [I]0-i ’m sitting on the couch in [my]0-i pajamas watching a movie , and [he]126-jameson ’s lying with [his]126-jameson head on [my]0-i lap , fast asleep . This feels strangely . . . normal . [He]126-jameson was n’t joking when [he]126-jameson said [he]126-jameson was tired . [He]126-jameson ’s more than tired — [he]126-jameson ’s exhausted . [I]0-i think it ’s more mental exhaustion than physical , and [I]0-i ca n’t imagine what [he]126-jameson deals with at work every day . [He]126-jameson ’s had the pressure of running [Miles Media]103-miles media from such a young age . Even in [his]126-jameson youth , [he]126-jameson would have been coached for this role . But [Jameson Miles the CEO]126-jameson is [a mere mortal]1499-a mere mortal , and [I]0-i feel a protective urge roll over [me]0-i . [I]0-i mindlessly run [my]0-i fingers through [his]126-jameson hair and enjoy this close time with [him]126-jameson . [I]0-i do n’t imagine [many people]1500-many people see [him]126-jameson so relaxed . “ [Jay]158-jay , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper softly . [He]126-jameson frowns in [his]126-jameson sleep . “ [Jay]158-jay , bedtime , [baby]3139-baby , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [He]126-jameson inhales as [he]126-jameson stretches and blinks , as if not knowing where [he]126-jameson is . [I]0-i run [my]0-i fingers through [his]126-jameson hair . “ Bedtime . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile softly . [I]0-i get up and turn off the lights and the television , and then [he]126-jameson takes [my]0-i hand and leads [me]0-i down [the hall]729-the hall to [[his]126-jameson bedroom]933-his bedroom . [He]126-jameson brushes [his]126-jameson teeth and gets into bed . A few moments later , once [I]0-i ’m ready , [I]0-i climb into bed beside [him]126-jameson , and [he]126-jameson pulls [me]0-i into [his]126-jameson arms . “ Good night , [sweetheart]3764-sweetheart , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers as [he]126-jameson kisses [my]0-i forehead . [We]1503-we lie cheek to cheek . There ’s a closeness between [us]1503-we that [I]0-i have n’t felt before . “ Good night . ”[0-i] [I]0-i snuggle against [his]126-jameson chest . This night has been nonsexual . . . and normal . . . and weirdly intimate . [I]0-i may be addicted . [I]0-i wake to the feeling of strong hands holding [my]0-i inner thighs apart . [Jameson]126-jameson ’s head is between [my]0-i legs , and [his]126-jameson thick tongue swipes through [my]0-i sex . [My]0-i head throws back , and [my]0-i hands go to the back of [his]126-jameson head . [My]0-i body is pumping with arousal , so [I]0-i know [he]126-jameson ’s been at it awhile . “ Oh God , ”[0-i] [I]0-i moan . “ Good morning , [Jay]158-jay . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson turns [his]126-jameson head and kisses [my]0-i inner thigh . “ Morning . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson bites [my]0-i clitoris , and [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes . Good God . [He]126-jameson ’s awake now and in all [his]126-jameson glory . [He]126-jameson continues to suck as waves of pleasure start to pulse through [me]0-i . [He]126-jameson pushes three thick fingers aggressively into [my]0-i sex , and [I]0-i wince . This is [Jameson]126-jameson ’s specialty — finger fucking [me]0-i with such force that [I]0-i orgasm before [we]1504-we even have sex . [I]0-i ’ve never been with [a man who can pleasure [me]0-i in so many different ways]1505-a man who can pleasure me in so many different ways . [He]126-jameson begins to ride [me]0-i , [his]126-jameson whole hand centered on the task . [My]0-i legs are back to the mattress , and God . “ Oh God . . . so good , ”[0-i] [I]0-i breathe . The sound of [my]0-i wet arousal echoes through [the silent room]1506-the silent room as [he]126-jameson works [me]0-i . [This man]327-this man is insane . Ten minutes ago [I]0-i was dead asleep . [He]126-jameson bends and nips [my]0-i clitoris , and [I]0-i convulse as [I]0-i come in a rush . [My]0-i body lurches forward , and [he]126-jameson pushes [me]0-i back down . “ Shh , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers as [he]126-jameson calms [me]0-i . “ Again , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson chants as [his]126-jameson eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ No . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i sit up in a rush and grab [his]126-jameson shoulder and pull [him]126-jameson up over [me]0-i . [We]1508-we kiss as [we]1508-we fall back to the mattress , and [my]0-i leg wraps around [his]126-jameson waist . Hell , what a way to wake up . [Our]1508-we kiss turns frantic , and [I]0-i feel [his]126-jameson cock nudge [my]0-i opening , and then [he]126-jameson pauses . “ It ’s okay . [I]126-jameson ’m on the pill , ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i breathe as [I]0-i hold [his]126-jameson face to [mine]0-i . [He]126-jameson closes [his]126-jameson eyes for a split second , and then , as if unable to relax without a condom , [he]126-jameson drags [himself]126-jameson off [me]0-i and goes to the bedside . [I]0-i watch as [he]126-jameson tears one open and rolls it on . Then [he]126-jameson ’s back on [me]0-i . [He]126-jameson slides home deep in one swift movement . [I]0-i cry out as [my]0-i sex begins to spasm around [his]126-jameson thick muscle . “ Hold it , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson growls . Fuck . . . how are [you]1509-you supposed to hold it ? Like that ’s a thing . [He]126-jameson looks down at [me]0-i . [His]126-jameson olive skin has a sheen of perspiration , [his]126-jameson blue eyes are beaming , and [I]0-i smile in wonder at the perfect specimen in front of [me]0-i . . . inside [me]0-i . [He]126-jameson widens [his]126-jameson legs and goes up unto [his]126-jameson knees and then lifts [my]0-i legs in front of [him]126-jameson by [my]0-i ankles and begins to pump [me]0-i — thick , heavy hits — and [his]126-jameson jaw hangs slack as [he]126-jameson watches the place [our]1510-our bodies meet . [I]0-i can see every muscle in [his]126-jameson torso contract as [he]126-jameson pushes forward . Goddamn . . . watching [Jameson Miles]126-jameson fuck is [the world]268-the world ’s best porn . [He]126-jameson picks up the pace , and [his]126-jameson body goes into overdrive . [I]0-i scrunch the blankets beneath [me]0-i as [I]0-i feel [myself]0-i build . The sound of [our]1510-our bodies slapping together echoes through [the room]613-the room . [His]126-jameson eyes close in ecstasy , and [he]126-jameson moans as [his]126-jameson body really goes to town . “ [I]0-i ’m close , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whimper . “ Hold it , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson barks as [he]126-jameson pumps . “ [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson grabs [my]0-i legs and puts them to one side and together , and [his]126-jameson eyes flicker with arousal as [his]126-jameson pumps become slow and measured . Oh . . . [[my]0-i man]3820-my man likes it tight . [I]0-i clench down , and [his]126-jameson head throws back . [I]0-i clench again , and [he]126-jameson ca n’t hold it . [He]126-jameson holds [himself]126-jameson deep , and [I]0-i feel the telling jerk as [he]126-jameson comes deep inside [my]0-i body . [He]126-jameson empties [himself]126-jameson , and then , knowing [I]0-i ca n’t come in that position , rises over [me]0-i and kisses [me]0-i as [we]1514-we fall tender . This is what [I]0-i love . . . this is [my]0-i favorite kind of sex with [him]126-jameson . Gentle , tender lovemaking . [He]126-jameson holds [himself]126-jameson up onto [his]126-jameson elbows and kisses [me]0-i as [his]126-jameson body gives [me]0-i exactly what [I]0-i need . [Him]126-jameson . . . [I]0-i need all of [him]126-jameson . [Our]1514-we eyes are locked as something so beautiful runs between [us]1514-we . [His]126-jameson kiss is tender , but it ’s the look in [his]126-jameson eyes that ’s turning [me]0-i inside out . [We]1514-we ’re falling for [each other]351-each other . This is not casual sex ; this is n’t even sex . This is the ultimate lovemaking . “ [Jay]158-jay , ”[0-i] [I]0-i pant as [my]0-i eyes search [his]126-jameson . “ [I]126-jameson know , [baby]3139-baby , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . [I]0-i grip [his]126-jameson shoulders , and [he]126-jameson holds [himself]126-jameson deep , and [my]0-i body contracts around [his]126-jameson . [His]126-jameson lips take [mine]0-i , and [our]1514-we kiss is slow and unhurried and everything [I]0-i ’ve never had . [He]126-jameson slowly finishes [me]0-i and then drops to the mattress beside [me]0-i and rolls [me]0-i to face [him]126-jameson . [We]1514-we look at [each other]351-each other , and [I]0-i ’m overwhelmed with a feeling of closeness . [I]0-i stare at [his]126-jameson beautiful face , and [I]0-i smile softly . “ [I]0-i feel like — ”[0-i] “ Do n’t . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson cuts [me]0-i off . “ What ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i frown . “ Do n’t ruin this . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i ’m at a loss by what [he]126-jameson means . “ How would [I]126-jameson ruin this ? ”[126-jameson] “ Do n’t fall in love with [me]126-jameson , [Emily]91-emily . ”[126-jameson] What the hell ? [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson . “ Why not ? ”[0-i] “ Because [we]3892-we ’re not like that . Get that through [your]126-jameson head . Right now . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson gets up in a rush and walks into [the bathroom]328-the bathroom and closes the door . It shuts with a sharp snap . [I]0-i roll onto [my]0-i back and stare at the ceiling . [I]0-i was going to say that [I]0-i felt like that was the best alarm clock of all time . Love was just an afterthought . Chapter 15 [I]0-i get out of bed and storm into [the bathroom]328-the bathroom . [I]0-i find [him]126-jameson under the shower . “ For the record , [Jameson]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap , “ [I]0-i was going to tell [you]126-jameson that [you]126-jameson should wake [me]0-i up like that every day . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson narrows [his]126-jameson eyes in anger . “ It seems to [me]126-jameson that [the only person who ’s thinking about love around here]3893-the only person who ’s thinking about love around here is [you]0-i . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson rolls [his]126-jameson eyes as [he]126-jameson soaps [his]126-jameson groin . [His]126-jameson eye - rolling infuriates [me]0-i . “ So do n’t turn this around and push [me]126-jameson away because [you]126-jameson are falling in love with [me]126-jameson ! ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i do n’t know what to say next , so [I]0-i storm out . [I]0-i grab [my]0-i bag and head down to one of [the other bathrooms]1519-the other bathrooms to shower . [I]0-i ’m not getting in with [him]126-jameson . [Stupid jerk]1520-stupid jerk . Half an hour later , [I]0-i walk out into [the kitchen]818-the kitchen to see [Mr. Miles the CEO]114-mr. miles — gray suit , white shirt , and cranky controlled persona firmly back in place . “ Are [you]126-jameson ready ? ”[114-mr. miles] “ Ah . ”[0-i] [I]0-i look around . “ [I]0-i ’ll just get [my]0-i things . ”[0-i] [I]0-i go into [the bedroom]925-the bedroom and glance at [myself]0-i in the mirror . [I]0-i ’m wearing [his]126-jameson favorite outfit today , and [he]126-jameson did n’t even notice . Well . . . poof to [him]126-jameson . [Damn control freak]1523-damn control freak is pissing [me]0-i off . [I]0-i walk back out with [my]0-i overnight bag over [my]0-i shoulder . “ Let ’s go . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson brow furrows when [he]126-jameson sees what [I]0-i ’m carrying . “ What are [you]0-i doing with that bag ? Just get it later . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]0-i ’ll take it to work with [me]0-i . That ’s fine . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes hold [his]126-jameson . “ [I]0-i have a lot going on this week . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson jaw clenches as [he]126-jameson glares at [me]0-i . “ Good . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson turns and walks out , and [I]0-i smirk . [I]0-i let [you]126-jameson have the control for the last few days , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles , but do n’t misjudge [my]0-i submission as a weakness . [I]0-i will not beg for [any man]1524-any man to love [me]0-i , [CEO billionaire with blue eyes or not]1525-ceo billionaire with blue eyes or not . Do n’t wreck it . [I]0-i know [I]0-i told [him]126-jameson [I]0-i want [friends with benefits]3744-friends with benefits . . . but the rules have changed . For [me]0-i , anyway . [We]1527-we get into [the elevator]428-the elevator , and [I]0-i stare straight ahead . [I]0-i can feel the animosity oozing out of [him]126-jameson . Part of [me]0-i hates that [I]0-i ’m letting [him]126-jameson get worked up before [he]126-jameson even starts for the day , but screw it . [I]0-i ca n’t spend [my]0-i life tiptoeing around [his]126-jameson stress levels . [We]1527-we walk out through [the foyer]799-the foyer , and [the limo]811-the limo is parked and waiting . [Alan]152-alan is standing next to the door . “ Hello , [Alan]152-alan . ”[152-alan] [I]0-i smile as [we]1527-we approach as if [I]0-i do n’t have a care in [the world]268-the world . [Alan]152-alan smiles and nods in acknowledgment . [Jameson]126-jameson stays silent . [He]126-jameson holds [his]126-jameson hand out for [me]0-i to get in first . [I]0-i climb in and shuffle over the seat , and [Jameson]126-jameson gets in beside [me]0-i . A folded newspaper sits on the seat , and [I]0-i pick it up and begin to read . [Jameson]126-jameson stares at [me]0-i , and [I]0-i know it ’s [his]126-jameson paper . Well , too bad — [I]0-i got it first . For ten minutes , [I]0-i read in silence . There is none of [my]0-i fake news today . Hmm . [I]0-i wonder if this has a correlation to [me]0-i not having it to [Hayden]113-hayden by four yesterday . [I]0-i think about it for a moment . [I]0-i ’m going to test this theory today . [I]0-i ’ll have a story to [him]126-jameson by three and see what happens . “ What are [you]0-i doing tonight ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks . “ [I]0-i ’m going out with [Ava]112-ava , ”[0-i] [I]0-i lie as [I]0-i pass the paper to [him]126-jameson . “ [I]0-i told [you]126-jameson [I]0-i did n’t want [you]126-jameson going clubbing with [her]112-ava . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . The nerve of [this control freak]1532-this control freak . “ What [I]0-i do when [I]0-i ’m not with [you]126-jameson is none of [your]126-jameson business , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[0-i] “ So now [you]126-jameson ’re going to be all dramatic ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . “ Will [you]126-jameson just stop . ”[0-i] “ Stop what ? ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes hold [his]126-jameson . “ [I]0-i ’m not in love with [you]126-jameson . So . . . [you]126-jameson can stop worrying that [I]0-i am . [I]0-i enjoy [your]126-jameson company , but [you]126-jameson obviously have a hang - up about someone caring for [you]126-jameson and mistake it for love . ”[0-i] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . “ It ’s all a bit too hard , to be honest . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson jaw clenches , and [I]0-i know [he]126-jameson ’s fuming on the inside . “ What does that mean ? ”[126-jameson] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ That it ’s too hard . ”[0-i] “ It means go and find [someone else]1023-someone else not to fall in love with [you]126-jameson . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug . “ [I]0-i ’m fine with that . ”[0-i] “ [You]0-i ’re fine with that ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers angrily . “ So if [I]126-jameson went and had sex with [someone else]1023-someone else tonight , [you]126-jameson ’d be fine with that ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson . What the hell is going on in that head of [his]126-jameson ? [I]0-i drag [my]0-i hand down [my]0-i face . “ [Jameson]126-jameson , for fuck ’s sake . What do [you]126-jameson want from [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] “ [I]126-jameson do n’t know , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson snaps . “ Fine . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i blow out a deep breath . “ Let ’s leave it at that , then . ”[0-i] “ What does that mean ? ”[0-i] “ [[My]0-i God]3255-my god , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap in exasperation . “ For [a smart man]3897-a smart man , [you]126-jameson ’re being really stupid . [I]0-i ca n’t help [you]126-jameson work out what [you]126-jameson want from [me]0-i , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson stares at [me]0-i . “ One minute [you]0-i ’re telling [me]126-jameson not to ruin it by falling in love with [you]0-i , and the next minute [you]0-i ’re telling [me]126-jameson [you]0-i do n’t want [me]126-jameson going out without [you]0-i . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson sits back in [his]126-jameson seat , affronted . “ [I]126-jameson want [a close friend]3898-a close friend to have sex with . [We]3899-we talked about this . It seems to [me]126-jameson that [the only person breaking the rules here]3900-the only person breaking the rules here is [you]0-i . Why are [you]0-i even thinking about love ? ”[126-jameson] “ Do n’t turn this on [me]126-jameson , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers angrily . “ All right , then , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ Can [you]126-jameson look [me]0-i in the eye and tell [me]0-i that [you]126-jameson have no feelings for [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson rolls [his]126-jameson eyes in disgust . “ Can [you]0-i ? ”[126-jameson] “ Of course [I]0-i can . ”[0-i] [I]0-i look [him]126-jameson straight in the eye . “ Do it , then . ”[0-i] “ What ? ”[126-jameson] “ Tell [me]126-jameson that [you]126-jameson do n’t have feelings for [me]126-jameson . Tell [me]126-jameson [you]126-jameson have never thought of [me]126-jameson once over the last year and that [you]126-jameson never kept [my]126-jameson scarf . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson narrows [his]126-jameson eyes in anger . “ Like [I]0-i thought , ”[0-i] [I]0-i huff as [I]0-i turn [my]0-i attention back out the window . “ [I]126-jameson wondered how long it would be until [that snarky bitch]3901-that snarky bitch reared [her]3901-that snarky bitch ugly head , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson mutters under [his]126-jameson breath . “ Ha , ”[0-i] [I]0-i huff . “ At least [that bitch]3902-that bitch knows what [she]3901-that snarky bitch wants . ”[0-i] “ And what ’s that ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson sneers . “ [A man]3093-a man ; that ’s what [she]3901-that snarky bitch wants — one who is n’t afraid of [his]3093-a man feelings . ”[126-jameson] “ Go to hell , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . “ Just stop talking . [You]0-i ’re stressing [me]126-jameson the fuck out with all [your]0-i shit . If [I]126-jameson wanted [a psychiatrist]3904-a psychiatrist , [I]126-jameson would date [one]3905-one . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smirk as [I]0-i look out the window . “ [We]3906-we ’re not dating , [Jameson]126-jameson . [We]3906-we ’re just fucking . Get it right . ”[0-i] “ [You]126-jameson go out with [Ava]112-ava trolling for [men]426-men tonight , and [we]3906-we wo n’t even be doing that . ”[1533-i] “ Excuse [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap as [my]0-i anger starts to simmer . “ [You]126-jameson ca n’t tell [me]0-i what to do . ”[0-i] [His]1533-i eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ [I]1533-i can . And [I]1533-i just did . ”[1533-i] “ [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause as [I]0-i try to think of a calm and intelligent reply . “ [I]0-i would never sleep with someone behind [your]126-jameson back — [you]126-jameson know that . But [you]126-jameson ca n’t tell [me]0-i where [I]0-i ’m allowed to go . Even if [you]126-jameson loved [me]0-i , which [you]126-jameson do n’t , [I]0-i would n’t allow [you]126-jameson to dictate what [I]0-i can do . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i mean it . ”[0-i] “ Go to hell . ”[0-i] [The car]422-the car pulls up around the corner at [my]0-i spot where [I]0-i get out , and [I]0-i open the door in a rush . “ [I]1535-i ’ll see [you]0-i tonight , ”[1535-i] [he]1535-i snaps as [I]0-i climb out . [I]0-i lean back into [the car]422-the car . “ Yeah , wait for [me]0-i . [I]0-i ’ll be there when hell freezes over . ”[0-i] [I]0-i slam the door in a rush . [The limo]811-the limo pulls out and slowly drives down [the road]638-the road toward [the Miles Media building]624-the miles media building , and [I]0-i inhale to try to calm [my]0-i furiously beating heart . [Stupid fucking jerk]1540-stupid fucking jerk . “ Wonder what this is about ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly frowns as [she]111-molly reads the news from [her]111-molly computer . “ What what ’s about ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply as [I]0-i type . “ It says here that [Miles Media]12-miles media is having crisis meetings today with [shareholders]3908-shareholders and that more meetings are scheduled in [London]8-london next week . ”[0-i] [My]0-i heart drops ; [Jameson]126-jameson ’s going to [London]8-london next week . “ What ? ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly turns [her]111-molly computer screen to face [me]0-i , and [I]0-i read the financial reviews story on the Miles Media stock prices slump . [I]0-i lean [my]0-i face onto [my]0-i hand as [I]0-i read on . God . . . what a nightmare . [I]0-i look over and see [Jake]158-jay laughing with [one of [the girls in [her]111-molly cubicle]1542-the girls in her cubicle as if [he]158-jay does n’t have a care in [the world]268-the world]1541-one of the girls in her cubicle as if he does n’t have a care in the world . What is [that stupid idiot]1544-that stupid idiot doing ? Is [he]1544-that stupid idiot even investigating the damn case at all ? Ugh , honestly , [I]0-i think [he]1544-that stupid idiot ’s [the wrong man]1545-the wrong man for the job . No investigating seems to be getting done , although [I]0-i ’m sure [he]1544-that stupid idiot has the phone numbers of [every single girl on the floor]1546-every single girl on the floor . Should [I]0-i tell [him]1544-that stupid idiot [my]0-i thoughts about [Hayden]113-hayden ? No , it ’s only a hunch with no real evidence . [I]0-i ’m testing the theory today . Screw this . [I]0-i ’ll have to find out who ’s doing this [myself]0-i . It ’s obvious [Jake]158-jay has no frigging idea . From the corner of [my]0-i eye , [I]0-i see [people]267-people scurry back to [their]267-people desks , and [I]0-i glance up to see [Jameson]126-jameson and [Tristan]135-tristan walking through the floor . [Tristan]135-tristan smiles and talks to [people]267-people as [he]135-tristan walks along . [Jameson]126-jameson stays solemn , in all [his]126-jameson cranky gorgeousness . [His]1544-that stupid idiot back is ramrod straight , and [his]1544-that stupid idiot face is so damn kissable it hurts . [You]1549-you ’re angry with [him]1544-that stupid idiot . . . remember , [fool]336-fool ? Look away , look away . [I]0-i go back to [my]0-i computer , but then [I]0-i see out of the corner of [my]0-i eye the familiar gray suit . [I]0-i look up to find [Jameson]126-jameson standing next to [my]0-i desk . “ Hello , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i fake a smile . [His]126-jameson eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ Hello . ”[126-jameson] “ Can [I]126-jameson help [you]126-jameson , [sir]3064-sir ? ”[126-jameson] “ Where is [Jake]158-jay ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says through gritted teeth . “ [Jake]158-jay would be flirting somewhere in [the office]444-the office , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say quietly . “ Look for [a good - looking woman]3911-a good - looking woman , and [you]126-jameson will find [him]158-jay . ”[0-i] [I]0-i point in the direction of [Jake]158-jay with [my]0-i pen . [Jameson]126-jameson inhales sharply as [he]126-jameson glares over at [Jake]158-jay as [he]158-jay talks to a blonde , completely unaware that [he]158-jay is being watched . [Jameson]126-jameson ’s eyes flick to [Tristan]135-tristan , and [they]1551-they both give a subtle shake of [their]1551-they heads . “ [Tristan]135-tristan , [I]0-i was wondering if [I]0-i can see [you]135-tristan for a few moments at some point this afternoon , please ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Yes , of course . Come up in half an hour . ”[0-i] [Jameson]126-jameson ’s eyes stay fixed on [me]0-i for a beat longer than necessary , as if [he]126-jameson ’s waiting for [me]0-i to say something . [I]0-i smile warmly as [I]0-i hide [my]0-i anger . Maybe [he]126-jameson ’s right , and [I]0-i really am [a bitch]3394-a bitch . “ Bye . ”[126-jameson] “ Goodbye , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says as [he]126-jameson turns and walks over toward [Jake]158-jay . [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i watch the moment [Jake]158-jay sees [him]126-jameson coming and how fast [he]158-jay jumps up from the corner of that desk . [Jameson]126-jameson says something to [him]158-jay , and then [I]0-i watch as [Jake]158-jay is marched to [the elevator]428-the elevator . [I]0-i hope [they]1554-they fire [him]158-jay . [He]126-jameson ’s definitely not worried about the enormity of this case . Forty minutes later , [I]0-i knock on [Tristan]135-tristan ’s door . “ Come in , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson calls . “ Hello . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smile . “ Hi , [Emily]91-emily . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson gestures to [his]126-jameson desk . “ Come take a seat . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i sit down . “ [I]126-jameson just wanted to keep [you]126-jameson updated on something that happened yesterday that felt out of the ordinary . ”[126-jameson] “ Great , okay . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson holds [his]126-jameson pen in [his]126-jameson hands . “ What is it ? ”[126-jameson] “ [Hayden]113-hayden came and asked [me]126-jameson for [my]126-jameson stories early . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson frowns as [he]126-jameson listens . “ It felt weird that [he]113-hayden needed them early . So . . . [I]126-jameson lied and said it was n’t ready yet . ”[126-jameson] “ And ? ”[126-jameson] “ And there was no fake news today . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson narrows [his]126-jameson eyes . “ [I]126-jameson do n’t know if [I]126-jameson ’m grasping at straws , but it kind of felt like the fake news stories only go to print if they are in by a certain time . ”[126-jameson] “ Interesting . That ’s great work . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson thinks for a moment . “ Hold the story back today so [we]1555-our can test the theory , and [I]126-jameson will start to dig up some info on [Hayden]113-hayden . Good work . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i stand . “ Is everything all right ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks . “ Yes , why ? ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson eyes hold [mine]0-i for a beat , and [I]0-i know that [Jameson]126-jameson has said something about [our]1555-our fight this morning . “ Just checking . ”[126-jameson] “ Everything ’s great . ”[126-jameson] “ Good . ”[126-jameson] “ See [you]126-jameson later . ”[0-i] [I]0-i bounce out of [the office]444-the office like [I]0-i do n’t have a care in [the world]268-the world . It ’s late Friday night , and [I]0-i stare at the television , [my]0-i mind in a blurred haze . [I]0-i have n’t heard from [Jameson]126-jameson since [our]1555-our fight on Wednesday morning . [I]0-i ’ve seen [him]126-jameson in passing at work , but that ’s all . Maybe that ’s it — maybe [I]0-i wo n’t see [him]126-jameson again . On Wednesday , [the romantic in [me]0-i]1558-the romantic in me was convinced [he]126-jameson had real feelings for [me]0-i and that [he]126-jameson would come back begging . On Thursday , [I]0-i decided that [the man]265-the man has deep emotional flaws if [he]126-jameson could n’t see [he]126-jameson had feelings for [me]0-i . Today . . . [I]0-i wonder if [I]0-i meant anything at all . Maybe [I]0-i ’ve looked at the whole thing through rose - colored glasses ? All along [he]126-jameson ’s given [me]0-i signs , and like [a fool]1560-a fool , [I]0-i ’ve ignored every one of them . [He]126-jameson leaves for [London]8-london on Monday , [I]0-i think — not that [I]0-i would know if [his]126-jameson plans have changed . [My]0-i mind goes back to the flight where [we]1561-we met , and now that [I]0-i know the life that [he]126-jameson leads . . . [I]0-i can see it all so clearly . [He]126-jameson did n’t ask for [my]0-i number because [he]126-jameson did n’t want anything — [he]126-jameson even said that was the reason why . But [I]0-i never thought that [he]126-jameson actually meant [he]126-jameson did n’t want anything . [I]0-i thought there was an ulterior motive and that was just the lie [he]126-jameson used to cover it . Maybe [some people]1562-some people are just wired never to want more . Or maybe [he]126-jameson just has n’t met [the right person]1563-the right person yet . So many maybes . [My]0-i door buzzes , and [I]0-i frown and get up and push the button . “ Hello . ”[0-i] “ Hey . ”[126-jameson] The voice is distorted . “ Who is it ? ”[126-jameson] “ It ’s [me]126-jameson , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson pants . “ [Jameson]126-jameson ? ”[126-jameson] “ [You]126-jameson expecting [someone else]1023-someone else ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says , obviously annoyed . [I]0-i smile , buzz [him]126-jameson in , and run into [the bedroom]925-the bedroom to take off [my]0-i ragged nightdress that has hot chocolate spilled down the front of it . [I]0-i flap [my]0-i arms around in a panic and grab a towel off the rack . [I]0-i wrap it around [my]0-i chest as if [I]0-i just got out of the shower . It ’s a lot better than a soiled nightdress with dancing teddy bears on it . Why [[my]0-i grandma]1565-my grandma thinks [dancing teddies]1566-dancing teddies is something [I]0-i need , [I]0-i ’ll never know . A knock sounds at the door , and [I]0-i open it in a rush . And there [he]126-jameson stands . Piercing blue eyes greet [me]0-i . [He]126-jameson ’s wet with perspiration and panting . [My]0-i face falls . “ Did [you]126-jameson run all the way [here]275-here ? ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson nods . [He]126-jameson has a melancholy feeling oozing out of [him]126-jameson . “ Are [you]126-jameson all right ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . [He]126-jameson shrugs , and [his]126-jameson eyes search [mine]0-i . “ [Jay]158-jay , ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i whisper as [my]0-i heart melts . [I]0-i take [him]126-jameson in [my]0-i arms and hold [him]126-jameson tight . [He]126-jameson clings to [me]0-i as if [his]126-jameson life depends on it . [We]1567-we stand in [each other]351-each other ’s arms for a long time ; no words are needed . At this moment , [he]126-jameson needs [me]0-i . “ Did [the ax murderer]3914-the ax murderer chase [you]126-jameson [here]275-here ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper up against [his]126-jameson cheek . [He]126-jameson smiles and grips [me]0-i tighter . “ Maybe . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson paid [him]3914-the ax murderer to do that . ”[126-jameson] “ [Witch]181-witch . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smirks . “ Come on , let ’s get [you]0-i in the shower . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i take [his]126-jameson hand and lead [him]126-jameson into [the bathroom]328-the bathroom and turn on the shower and take [his]126-jameson shirt off over [his]126-jameson head . [His]126-jameson eyes darken , and [I]0-i slowly slide [his]126-jameson track pants down [his]126-jameson legs . “ [I]126-jameson ’ve had the worst few days , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson murmurs . [I]0-i nod as [I]0-i slide [his]126-jameson briefs down [his]126-jameson legs . “ [I]0-i know , [baby]3139-baby . This work nightmare will be over soon . ”[0-i] “ It has nothing to do with work . ”[0-i] “ What ’s it got to do with ? ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson eyes hold [mine]0-i , and [he]126-jameson swallows the lump in [his]126-jameson throat . “ [You]0-i . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile softly as [my]0-i heart free - falls from [my]0-i chest . “ [You]126-jameson missed [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson nods as if [he]126-jameson ’s feeling stupid . [I]0-i kiss [him]126-jameson and hold [his]126-jameson face in [my]0-i hands . “ [I]0-i missed [you]126-jameson , too , [you]126-jameson big dope . ”[0-i] “ But [you]126-jameson said — ”[126-jameson] “ Do n’t worry about what [that snarky bitch]3901-that snarky bitch said . [She]3901-that snarky bitch ’s off [her]3901-that snarky bitch chops . Pay [her]3901-that snarky bitch no attention . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smirks as [his]126-jameson hands drop to [my]0-i behind . “ Off [her]3901-that snarky bitch chops ? What the hell does that even mean , [Emily]91-emily ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i giggle . “ When [snarky bitches]3918-snarky bitches go crazy , [they]3918-snarky bitches go off [their]3918-snarky bitches chops . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson chuckles and holds [me]0-i close and inhales deeply into [my]0-i hair as if [he]126-jameson ’s relieved . “ [I]126-jameson do n’t know what ’s going on between [us]3919-us , [Jay]158-jay . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i hesitate as [I]0-i try to articulate what [I]0-i want to say . “ But [you]0-i can depend on [me]0-i . Do n’t be scared of [us]3919-us . Because [I]0-i ’m not . ”[0-i] “ [You]0-i should be , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson fires back . “ Why would [I]126-jameson be scared of [someone who makes [me]126-jameson feel the way [you]126-jameson make [me]126-jameson feel]3920-someone who makes me feel the way you make me feel ? ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson face softens , and [he]126-jameson dusts [my]0-i bottom lip with [his]126-jameson thumb . “ It ’s been a long few days without [you]0-i . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smile softly . [I]0-i love [him]126-jameson when [he]126-jameson ’s like this . “ Get in the shower , and wash away the last week , and stay with [me]0-i . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson kiss deepens , and [I]0-i feel [his]126-jameson erection begin to grow up against [my]0-i stomach . [He]126-jameson pulls off the towel and leads [me]0-i into the shower by the hand and pushes [me]0-i up against the wall . [We]1570-we kiss like [we]1570-we ’ve been starved of [each other]351-each other . [[My]0-i man]3820-my man [Jim]90-jim is back . . . and [I]0-i feel like [we]1570-we just jumped over some invisible hurdle between [us]1570-we . What exactly that is [I]0-i just do n’t know , but [I]0-i feel if [I]0-i can bring [Jim]90-jim to [me]0-i for long enough for things to become real between [us]1570-we , maybe [I]0-i can help [Jameson]126-jameson get some kind of work - life balance . Monday morning [Jay]158-jay holds [me]0-i tight in [his]158-jay arms as [we]1570-we say [our]1570-we goodbyes . [He]158-jay goes to [London]8-london for a week today . [He]158-jay has meetings all week . [We]1570-we ’ve had the most amazing weekend . [We]1570-we stayed here at [[my]0-i apartment]940-my apartment the entire time . [I]0-i ’ve cooked for [us]1570-we , [we]1570-we ’ve made love and watched movies , and [we]1570-we even went for a run . Not [a cranky CEO]1574-a cranky ceo in sight . [We]1570-we went back to [[his]158-jay place]3354-his place last night to pack [his]158-jay bag , and even then , [we]1570-we came back here to [[my]0-i house]3405-my house to sleep . [I]0-i feel that when [he]158-jay ’s here at [[my]0-i house]3405-my house , [he]158-jay ’s able to detach from being [Jameson Miles the CEO]126-jameson and just be [a regular man]1578-a regular man . . . [[my]0-i man]3820-my man . [He]158-jay can forget who [he]158-jay is for a while and what is expected of [him]158-jay . The dynamic has shifted between [us]1570-we . [I]0-i do n’t know how to stop it , but [I]0-i ’m falling for [him]158-jay . [I]0-i can feel [myself]0-i slipping under the water , [his]158-jay water . . . the beautiful spell of [Jameson Miles]126-jameson . “ No layovers , okay ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [He]158-jay smiles as [we]1570-we kiss . “ No talking to [girls who get upgraded]3921-girls who get upgraded . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay grabs [my]0-i behind . “ Stop talking , [wench]3922-wench . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i grip [him]158-jay tighter . “ Oh . [I]0-i hate the thought of a week without [you]0-i . ”[0-i] [He]158-jay kisses [me]0-i again but remains silent . “ Will [you]158-jay say something ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Say something sweet to put [me]0-i out of [my]0-i misery . ”[0-i] [His]158-jay eyes come to [mine]0-i as [he]158-jay cups [my]0-i face . “ [I]158-jay packed [your]0-i scarf in [my]158-jay luggage . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i smile softly . “ It ’s nothing new . [I]0-i ’ve taken it on every trip [I]0-i ’ve been on . . . since [we]3923-we met . ”[0-i] A wave of unexpected emotion overwhelms [me]0-i , and [my]0-i eyes fill with tears . [I]0-i blink them away in the hope [he]158-jay does n’t see . “ [You]158-jay have ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [He]158-jay nods and kisses [me]0-i as [he]158-jay holds [my]0-i face , and it ’s tender and perfect and God , [I]0-i just want to blurt out that maybe [I]0-i really do love [him]158-jay for real now . But [I]0-i wo n’t , because then [I]0-i will ruin it . Whatever this is . [I]0-i lie in bed and aimlessly scroll through Instagram , but [my]0-i mind is anything but on [my]0-i feed . [Jameson]126-jameson is [my]0-i focus . [I]0-i ’ve missed [him]126-jameson this week , but [I]0-i know [he]126-jameson ’s missed [me]0-i too . Even with all [his]126-jameson meetings and stress over there , [he]126-jameson has kept in constant touch . Hopefully when [he]126-jameson gets back , [we]1580-we can decipher what ’s really going on here . [My]0-i phone rings , and the letter J lights up [my]0-i screen . “ Hello . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ Hey there , ”[158-jay] [his]158-jay deep velvety voice purrs down the line . “ How ’s [[my]158-jay man]3820-my man ? ”[158-jay] “ Good , busy . How are [you]3820-my man ? ”[158-jay] “ [Lonely]182-lonely . ”[158-jay] [We]1580-we ’ve spoken every day since [he]158-jay ’s been gone . . . twice a day , actually . [He]158-jay chuckles . “ [You]0-i did n’t look too lonely last night in that Skype session . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i feel [my]0-i face flush . [We]1580-we ’ve been sexting [each other]351-each other every night , and last night [I]0-i may have given [him]158-jay a little vibrator show . The look on [his]158-jay face was one of pure pleasure . [I]0-i clench [my]0-i sex just thinking about the way [he]158-jay was pulling [himself]158-jay as [he]158-jay watched [me]0-i . [God]88-god . . . [deviants]1582-deviants . “ What ’s going on today , [sweetheart]3764-sweetheart ? ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay asks . [My]0-i stomach flips every time [he]158-jay calls [me]0-i that ; it will never grow old . “ Working . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i try not to talk about work with [him]158-jay . [I]0-i want to keep [our]1583-our relationship as separated as [I]0-i can . “ What are [you]158-jay up to ? ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i ’m just about to go out to dinner with [Elliot]155-elliot . [He]155-elliot ’s introducing [me]0-i to [some girl [he]155-elliot ’s met]3926-some girl he ’s met . ”[0-i] “ Really ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ Has [he]155-elliot fallen in love ? ”[0-i] “ God , no . [He]155-elliot falls in lust every week , though . ”[0-i] [I]0-i giggle . “ Are [you]158-jay going out tonight ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . “ No , [Jay]158-jay ; relax , will [you]158-jay ? ”[0-i] [God]88-god , [he]1584-he ’s frigging traumatized from that night [I]0-i was dancing with [the blond god]1153-the blond god . “ It ’s hard to relax when [I]1153-the blond god know how gorgeous [you]158-jay are on [the other side of the world]3927-the other side of the world all alone . ”[1153-the blond god] “ Well , in four more days [you]158-jay ’ll be back . ”[0-i] [I]0-i glance at [my]0-i watch . “ [I]0-i ’ve got to go . [I]0-i ’m going to miss [my]0-i bus . ”[0-i] “ Okay . [I]1584-he ’ll let [you]158-jay go . Have a nice day , [babe]3279-babe . ”[1584-he] [He]1584-he sighs . “ [You]1584-he too , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [He]1584-he lingers on the line . Even on [the other side of the world]3927-the other side of the world , [he]1584-he has an effect on [me]0-i . [He]1584-he ’s waiting for [me]0-i to tell [him]1584-he [I]0-i ’m missing [him]1584-he . . . [he]1584-he always does . “ [I]0-i ’m missing [you]1584-he . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ [Me]0-i too . ”[0-i] “ [I]1584-he ’ll speak to [you]1584-he tonight . ”[1584-he] “ Okay . Bye . ”[0-i] [Molly]111-molly and [I]0-i ’ve just been out for dinner , and [she]111-molly ’s driving [me]0-i [home]3076-home . [Her]111-molly phone rings through the Bluetooth in [[her]111-molly car]1588-her car . The name [Michael]96-michael lights up the screen . “ Hello , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly answers . “ Oh [my]111-molly God , [Molly]111-molly . [I]111-molly need [your]111-molly help . ”[111-molly] “ What ’s wrong ? ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly stammers as [she]111-molly slows [the car]422-the car down . [Michael]96-michael is [[her]111-molly ex - husband]667-her ex - husband ; [my]0-i eyes widen as [I]0-i listen . “ [I]111-molly took something , and now [I]111-molly ’m driving , and [I]111-molly just passed out , and [my]111-molly car hit a guardrail . ”[111-molly] “ What ? ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly cries as [she]111-molly pulls [the car]422-the car over to the side . “ [I]111-molly feel so dizzy . ”[111-molly] “ Holy shit , tell [me]111-molly where [you]111-molly are ! ”[111-molly] “ [I]111-molly ’m on [the interstate near [the garage]3930-the garage [we]3931-we get gas from]3929-the interstate near the garage we get gas from . ”[111-molly] “ Okay , [I]111-molly ’m on [my]111-molly way . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly does a U - turn and starts speeding in the other direction . [She]111-molly ’s driving like a bat out of hell , and [I]0-i hold on for dear life . “ Do [you]111-molly know mouth to mouth ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ No . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly shrugs . “ Maybe a little bit . Can [you]0-i google passing out for [me]111-molly ? ”[111-molly] [I]0-i start to google . “ Should [we]3931-we just call [an ambulance]3932-an ambulance ? ”[0-i] “ Maybe . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly looks between [me]0-i and [the road]638-the road ; [she]111-molly calls [him]1593-he back . “ Hello , ”[1593-he] [he]1593-he says in a meek voice . “ Are [you]111-molly okay ? ”[1593-he] “ Yes . ”[111-molly] “ Should [I]1593-he call an ambulance ? ”[1593-he] “ No , ”[1593-he] [he]1593-he snaps . “ Just get [here]275-here . ”[1593-he] Five minutes later [we]1594-we pull up behind [[his]1593-he parked car]1595-his parked car , and [we]1594-we can see [him]1593-he slumped in the front seat . [We]1594-we both get out to run up to [the car]422-the car . “ Thank God [you]111-molly ’re here , ”[1593-he] [he]1593-he splutters when [he]1593-he sees [her]111-molly . Then [he]1593-he sees [me]0-i , and [his]1593-he face falls . “ It ’s all right . This is [Emily]91-emily , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly says . “ What happened ? ”[1593-he] [He]1593-he points at [her]111-molly and [me]0-i . “ Do not tell [a soul]3440-a soul . ”[1593-he] “ What ? ”[1593-he] [He]1593-he gets out of [the car]422-the car , and [we]1594-we both look down . [He]1593-he has a huge erection . “ What the fuck ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly gasps . “ [I]111-molly have a Tinder date tonight , so [I]111-molly took a Viagra , but it did n’t seem to work , so [I]111-molly took another two . ”[111-molly] [I]0-i put [my]0-i hands over [my]0-i mouth in horror . [Molly]111-molly ’s eyes widen . “ [You]111-molly took three Viagra ? ”[111-molly] [He]1593-he nods , [his]1593-he erection nearly splitting [his]1593-he pants . “ [You]111-molly are [the stupidest fucking man [I]1593-he ’ve ever known]3935-the stupidest fucking man i ’ve ever known . ”[1593-he] “ Without a doubt . ”[1593-he] [He]1593-he winces . [He]1593-he goes to move and then gets dizzy and has to hold on to [the car]422-the car for balance . “ Get in [the car]422-the car , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly demands . “ [I]111-molly ’m taking [you]1593-he to [the ER]3937-the er . ”[111-molly] “ What ? ”[1593-he] [he]1593-he stammers . “ No . ”[1593-he] “ [You]1593-he have no blood left in [your]1593-he body , [[you]1593-he stupid fuck]3938-you stupid fuck ! ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly cries . [He]1593-he puts [his]1593-he head into [his]1593-he hands , and [I]0-i want to burst out laughing so hard . [I]0-i bite [my]0-i lip to stop [myself]0-i as [I]0-i look between [the two of them]3259-the two of them . “ What ’s [the ER]183-the er going to do ? ”[1593-he] [he]1593-he cries . “ Other than laugh at [the middle - aged man with a Tinder erection]3939-the middle - aged man with a tinder erection , nothing . Get in [the damn car]3940-the damn car . ”[1593-he] [He]1593-he goes to walk and then falls to the ground , and [we]1600-we both run to pick [him]1593-he up and put [him]1593-he in the front of [[Molly]111-molly ’s car]1601-molly ’s car . [I]0-i climb in the back . [Molly]111-molly ’s eyes flick to [him]1593-he as [he]1593-he lies back on the seat in pain , and [I]0-i stay silent , unsure what to say . [I]0-i ’ll catch [a cab]3509-a cab [home]3076-home from [the ER]3937-the er . [I]0-i do n’t want to be in the way . [Molly]111-molly shakes [her]111-molly head as [she]111-molly drives . “ So . . . let [me]111-molly get this straight , [Michael]96-michael . [You]96-michael ’re going out with [Madam Whorebag]184-madam whorebag tonight , and [you]96-michael go to all this trouble to satisfy whoever [she]184-madam whorebag is in bed ? ”[111-molly] [He]1593-he looks over at [her]111-molly and clenches [his]1593-he jaw as if [he]1593-he knows what ’s coming next . “ [You]96-michael could n’t even be bothered to have sex with [me]111-molly at all , [Michael]96-michael ! ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly screams . “ How the hell do [you]96-michael think that makes [me]111-molly feel ? ”[111-molly] “ Because [you]111-molly did n’t fucking like it , ”[1593-he] [he]1593-he fires back . “ Because [I]1593-he got [two fucking pumps]3941-two fucking pumps . ”[1593-he] [My]0-i eyes widen . Oh jeez . [I]0-i so do n’t want to be here right now . [I]0-i slump into [my]0-i seat to try to hide . “ Why do [you]111-molly think [I]1593-he have to take this shit ? Huh ? ”[1593-he] [he]1593-he yells . “ Because [I]1593-he knew what a fucking disappointment [I]1593-he was to [you]111-molly . ”[1593-he] [Molly]111-molly ’s eyes widen in rage . “ [You]111-molly were never [a disappointment]3942-a disappointment . [You]111-molly were fucking lazy and did n’t care . ”[111-molly] “ [I]1593-he did so care ! ”[1593-he] [he]1593-he screams . “ Losing [you]111-molly is the biggest regret of [my]1593-he life . ”[1593-he] [I]0-i put [my]0-i head into [my]0-i hands . [I]0-i wonder if [they]1605-they would notice if [I]0-i dived out of [the moving car]1606-the moving car . [Molly]111-molly glares at [him]1593-he , and [the car]422-the car coasts to one side of [the highway]1608-the highway . [I]0-i wince . “ Eyes on [the road]638-the road , [Moll]111-molly , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [She]111-molly straightens [the car]422-the car . “ So why did n’t [you]1593-he call [her]111-molly to come and get [you]1593-he tonight , huh ? ”[111-molly] “ Because [I]1593-he would n’t tell [her]111-molly anything about [me]1593-he . ”[1593-he] [He]1593-he sighs as [he]1593-he leans [his]1593-he head onto [his]1593-he hand , clearly upset . “ Why not ? ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly yells . “ Because [she]111-molly ’s not [you]1593-he ! ”[111-molly] [The car]422-the car falls silent , and [my]0-i eyes fill with tears . [He]1593-he still loves [her]111-molly . Oh . . . this is so sad . Moments later [we]1611-we pull into [the hospital]1612-the hospital and help [him]1593-he out of [the car]422-the car and into [the reception room]1614-the reception room , and [Molly]111-molly goes up to the desk . “ [[My]111-molly husband]3944-my husband needs to see [somebody]271-somebody , please . ”[111-molly] “ What ’s the problem ? ”[1615-the nurse] [the nurse]1615-the nurse asks . [She]1615-the nurse drops [her]1615-the nurse shoulders as [she]1615-the nurse steels [herself]1615-the nurse to say it out loud . “ [I]1615-the nurse accidentally gave [him]1593-he too much Viagra . ”[1615-the nurse] [Michael]96-michael takes [her]1615-the nurse hand in a silent thank - [you]1616-you , and [I]0-i smile softly . [She]1615-the nurse ’s covering for [him]1593-he to save [him]1593-he the embarrassment . “ Oh . ”[1615-the nurse] [The nurse]1615-the nurse ’s face falls , and [she]1615-the nurse gets a wheelchair . With [Molly]111-molly walking beside [him]1593-he , [he]1593-he is wheeled down [the corridor]728-the corridor . [I]0-i take a seat and inhale deeply as [my]0-i faith in [the human race]1619-the human race is restored . [I]0-i learned a lesson tonight — love comes in all shapes and sizes . [Jameson]126-jameson [I]0-i tap the whiteboard in front of [me]0-i as [I]0-i stand and go through [our]1620-our discussion topics . “ This projection here is based on the current climate . However , that may change when the election goes through . ”[0-i] Buzz . [My]0-i phone dances across the table , and [I]0-i look up at [the men sitting around the board table]1621-the men sitting around the board table . Damn it , just let it ring out . [Elliot]155-elliot glances down at [my]0-i phone at the same time to see the caller ID . FB . But [I]0-i want to hear [her]111-molly voice ; two minutes wo n’t hurt . “ [I]111-molly have to take this call . [Elliot]155-elliot , can [you]155-elliot go through the advertising strategy for next month , please , while [I]111-molly do ? ”[111-molly] “ Sure thing . ”[155-elliot] [Elliot]155-elliot stands and takes over , and [I]0-i answer the call and leave [the room]613-the room and head into [[Christopher]156-christopher ’s office next door]1623-christopher ’s office next door . “ Hello . ”[156-christopher] “ Hi . ”[91-emily] [Emily]91-emily ’s happy voice beams down the phone line . “ Hi . ”[91-emily] [I]0-i find [myself]0-i smiling stupidly as [I]0-i stand at the window overlooking [London]8-london . “ Did [I]111-molly interrupt anything ? ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly asks . [I]0-i smirk . Only a meeting with [twelve management staff]1624-twelve management staff . “ No , not at all . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i called to tell [you]111-molly [I]0-i bought new sneakers . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ [You]0-i did ? ”[0-i] “ Uh - huh , [they]3946-they ’re motorized , so [I]0-i will be whipping [your]111-molly ass on park runs from here on in . Just thought [I]0-i should warn [you]111-molly . ”[0-i] [God]88-god . . . [she]111-molly ’s so refreshingly normal . When has [a woman]381-a woman ever called [me]0-i to tell [me]0-i [she]381-a woman bought new sneakers ? “ [I]381-a woman highly doubt that . ”[381-a woman] “ Oh hell , [you]0-i wo n’t believe what happened last night , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly continues . “ [[Molly]111-molly ’s ex - husband]3947-molly ’s ex - husband took two Viagra , maybe three , and passed out while [he]3947-molly ’s ex - husband was driving because [he]3947-molly ’s ex - husband had no blood left in [his]3947-molly ’s ex - husband body because it was all in [his]3947-molly ’s ex - husband dick , so [we]3948-we had to take [him]3947-molly ’s ex - husband to [the ER]3937-the er . ”[111-molly] [I]0-i laugh out loud . “ What the hell ? Is that a thing ? ”[0-i] “ Yes , it ’s a thing . Who knew ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i widen [my]0-i eyes . Jesus . “ [I]0-i ’ll have to stop taking it , then , ”[0-i] [I]0-i tease . [She]111-molly laughs . “ No , it ’s okay . [I]111-molly completely know what to do now . Passing out is well worth it . [You]0-i stay on that shit — [we]3948-we just need to tourniquet it . [I]111-molly ’ve got [us]3948-we covered . ”[111-molly] [We]1626-we both laugh and then fall silent . “ Three days , ”[0-i] [I]0-i murmur . “ Three days , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly repeats . God , [I]0-i ’ve never been so anxious to get [home]3076-home in [my]0-i life . “ What are [you]111-molly doing now ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [I]0-i ’m about to put a face mask on and take a bath with cut - up cucumber over [my]0-i eyes . [You]111-molly ’re missing out on a real visual sensation over here . ”[0-i] “ No doubt . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . [This woman]943-this woman is so naturally beautiful . [She]943-this woman does n’t try to be something [she]943-this woman ’s not . [I]0-i love that about [her]943-this woman . [I]0-i love a lot of things about [her]943-this woman . . . “ So [you]111-molly ’ve added cucumbers to [your]111-molly beauty regimen now ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Yeah , it ’s supposed to make [you]111-molly less puffy . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile broadly . “ Cucumbers are good for a lot of things . Maybe it should be added to [our]3950-our sexual regimen as well . ”[0-i] [She]943-this woman bursts out laughing . “ [You]0-i ’re [a sicko]3951-a sicko , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles . ”[943-this woman] “ So [you]0-i keep telling [me]0-i . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i ’ll let [you]0-i go . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk as [I]0-i look out the window . “ Goodbye , [Emily]91-emily . ”[0-i] “ Goodbye , [Jay]158-jay , ”[943-this woman] [she]943-this woman whispers . The phone goes dead , and [I]0-i head back into [the boardroom]1629-the boardroom and take a seat . [Christopher]156-christopher is now talking about something , and [I]0-i take [my]0-i seat next to [Elliot]155-elliot . [He]155-elliot leans over and whispers , “ [You]0-i have [Zuckerberg]185-zuckerberg on speed dial now ? ”[155-elliot] “ Huh ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ FB . . . that stands for Facebook , right ? ”[155-elliot] [I]0-i frown and then realize [he]155-elliot ’s talking about the call from [Emily]91-emily . FB stands for fuck bunny , not [Facebook]186-facebook . [I]0-i smirk , and then [I]0-i pinch the bridge of [my]0-i nose as [my]0-i chuckle breaks through . “ What ’s so funny ? ”[155-elliot] [Elliot]155-elliot whispers . “ [Zuckerberg]185-zuckerberg bought motorized sneakers . ”[155-elliot] [Elliot]155-elliot rolls [his]155-elliot eyes . “ It would n’t surprise [me]155-elliot . [That guy]3740-that guy ’s fucking crazy . ”[155-elliot] [I]0-i catch [a cab]3509-a cab with a thousand thoughts running through [my]0-i mind . There ’s so much history between [the two of [us]1631-the two of us]1631-the two of us . [I]0-i ’m on [my]0-i way to see [[my]0-i ex]315-my ex , who was supposed to be [the love of [my]0-i life]1633-the love of my life . It ’s been a long time since [I]0-i ’ve seen [Claudia]122-claudia . [She]122-claudia was in [the States]1634-the states the last time [I]0-i was in [London]8-london . [Both being workaholics]1635-both being workaholics has always worked against [us]1631-the two of us — time together is precious . [I]0-i knock on the door and exhale ; [my]0-i nerves are thumping heavily . The door opens in a rush , and [her]122-claudia beautiful face comes into view . [She]122-claudia smiles broadly and wraps [her]122-claudia arms around [my]0-i neck . “ Thank [God]88-god [you]0-i ’re here , ”[122-claudia] [she]122-claudia whispers into [my]0-i neck . “ [I]122-claudia ’ve missed [you]0-i . ”[122-claudia] Chapter 16 “ Hello . ”[122-claudia] [I]0-i smile as [she]122-claudia leads [me]0-i into [[her]122-claudia house]1636-her house by the hand . [Her]122-claudia touch is warm . . . familiar . “ How are [you]122-claudia ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Good now that [you]0-i ’re here . ”[0-i] [She]122-claudia takes [me]0-i in [her]122-claudia arms , and [I]0-i smile down at [her]122-claudia . There ’s a bond between [us]1637-us that can never be broken . Realizing what [I]0-i ’m doing , [I]0-i pull out of [her]122-claudia arms and stand back . Being in [her]122-claudia arms was n’t on today ’s agenda . [Her]122-claudia face falls before [she]122-claudia quickly recovers . “ Any news on the sabotage ? ”[122-claudia] “ No , none yet . ”[122-claudia] [She]122-claudia watches [me]0-i for a moment , and [her]122-claudia knowing eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ [You]0-i have something on [your]0-i mind . What is it ? ”[122-claudia] “ [I]122-claudia ’ve met [someone]401-someone . ”[122-claudia] “ Do n’t . ”[122-claudia] [She]122-claudia turns [her]122-claudia back to [me]0-i and walks to [the kitchen]818-the kitchen and puts the kettle on . “ [I]122-claudia could n’t help it . ”[122-claudia] [I]0-i walk up behind [her]122-claudia and put [my]0-i hand out to touch [her]122-claudia and then recoil it . [I]0-i take a safe step back . “ Do n’t tell [me]0-i [you]122-claudia could n’t help it when [we]3954-we both know [you]122-claudia can . ”[0-i] “ The pull to [her]122-claudia is strong . ”[0-i] “ Physical pull ? ”[122-claudia] [she]122-claudia asks flatly . [I]0-i roll [my]0-i lips as [I]0-i watch [her]122-claudia ; [she]122-claudia ’s going to go postal any moment . “ At first , yes . [I]122-claudia thought it was just physical . ”[122-claudia] [Her]122-claudia eyes come to [mine]0-i . “ How long ago did [you]0-i meet [her]122-claudia ? ”[122-claudia] “ Twelve months . ”[122-claudia] [Her]122-claudia face screws up in fury . “ [You]0-i ’ve been seeing [someone]401-someone for twelve months ? ”[122-claudia] “ No , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ [I]0-i met [her]122-claudia on a flight a year ago , [we]3956-we spent a night together on a layover , and [I]0-i ’ve recently run into [her]122-claudia again . ”[0-i] “ Big deal , [Jameson]126-jameson . [You]126-jameson ’ve slept with [a lot of [women]300-women]3957-a lot of women while [we]3956-we ’ve been on this break , ”[122-claudia] [she]122-claudia fires back angrily . “ [This one]3959-this one ’s different , [Claudia]122-claudia , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say softly . [She]122-claudia rolls [her]122-claudia eyes in disgust and turns [her]122-claudia back to [me]0-i once again . “ [I]122-claudia ’ve thought of her”—I[122-claudia] pause , unsure how much to share—“a lot since [we]3956-we met , and then it was as if [I]122-claudia . . . ”[122-claudia] [My]0-i voice trails off , and [I]0-i stare at [her]122-claudia back as [I]0-i wait for [her]122-claudia reply . “ As if [you]0-i what ? ”[122-claudia] [she]122-claudia eventually asks . “ It was as if [I]122-claudia willed [her]122-claudia back into [my]122-claudia life . ”[122-claudia] [She]122-claudia turns sharply . “ Meaning what ? ”[122-claudia] “ [She]122-claudia ’d been on [my]122-claudia mind a lot . . . and then [she]122-claudia showed up in [[my]122-claudia office]529-my office . ”[122-claudia] [She]122-claudia rolls [her]122-claudia eyes , unimpressed . “ Of course [she]122-claudia would — you’re [Jameson Miles]126-jameson . ”[122-claudia] “ [She]122-claudia had no idea who [I]122-claudia was when [we]3961-we met . [I]122-claudia gave [her]122-claudia a fake name . ”[122-claudia] “ So why are [you]0-i here , [Jameson]126-jameson ? ”[122-claudia] [she]122-claudia demands . [I]0-i swallow the lump of regret in [my]0-i throat . “ [I]0-i ’m here to end it with [you]122-claudia . ”[0-i] “ Do n’t [you]0-i . ”[122-claudia] [She]122-claudia points at [me]0-i . “ Do n’t [you]0-i dare throw away everything [we]3961-we ’ve worked so hard to keep together . ”[122-claudia] [Her]122-claudia eyes fill with tears . “ [Claud]187-claud . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh softly . “ [We]3961-we ’re no good together . [We]3961-we ’re both [workaholics]3962-workaholics , [we]3961-we live on other sides of [the world]268-the world , and unless one of [us]3961-we loses [our]3961-we job , that ’s never going to change . [I]0-i ca n’t be anywhere but [New York]3-new york . ”[0-i] “ What if [I]122-claudia moved back ? ”[122-claudia] [she]122-claudia offers . “ And give up [your]122-claudia dream job ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh . “ [I]0-i would n’t let [you]122-claudia do that for [me]0-i . [I]0-i know how hard [you]122-claudia ’ve worked for this job . ”[0-i] [She]122-claudia stares at [me]0-i , and [I]0-i take [her]122-claudia in [my]0-i arms . “ [You]122-claudia need to fall in love with [someone who can support [you]122-claudia in [your]122-claudia role]3964-someone who can support you in your role . ”[0-i] “ [I]122-claudia have , ”[122-claudia] [she]122-claudia whispers as [she]122-claudia clings to [me]0-i . [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes as [I]0-i kiss [her]122-claudia temple . “ [Two people who are wired the same way ca n’t be in a forever relationship]3965-two people who are wired the same way ca n’t be in a forever relationship . [We]3965-two people who are wired the same way ca n’t be in a forever relationship need to be with [opposites]3966-opposites , [Claud]187-claud . ”[0-i] [I]0-i squeeze [her]122-claudia a bit tighter . “ [Two workaholics]3967-two workaholics will never work . [We]3965-two people who are wired the same way ca n’t be in a forever relationship ’re both too focused and too stressed out to properly look after [one another]3968-one another . ”[0-i] [She]122-claudia stares at [me]0-i , and [I]0-i know that deep down , [she]122-claudia knows [I]0-i ’m right . [Her]122-claudia eyes well with tears . “ What happened to [our]3965-two people who are wired the same way ca n’t be in a forever relationship five - year plan ? ”[122-claudia] [she]122-claudia whispers . “ It was good in theory , but come on . [We]3965-two people who are wired the same way ca n’t be in a forever relationship both knew when [we]3965-two people who are wired the same way ca n’t be in a forever relationship made the break that there was a big chance [we]3965-two people who are wired the same way ca n’t be in a forever relationship would n’t make it through to the other side . ”[122-claudia] “ [I]122-claudia ’ll move back , ”[122-claudia] [she]122-claudia pleads . [My]0-i eyes hold [hers]122-claudia , and [I]0-i know there ’s no easy way to say this . “ It ’s too late . [I]122-claudia have feelings for [Emily]91-emily . It ’s [her]91-emily that [I]122-claudia want now . ”[122-claudia] [Her]122-claudia face screws up in anger . “ [Emily]91-emily , is it ? ”[122-claudia] [she]122-claudia sneers . [I]0-i clench [my]0-i jaw as [I]0-i watch [her]122-claudia . “ Who is [she]91-emily ? What does [she]91-emily do ? ”[0-i] “ [She]91-emily ’s just [a normal girl from [the suburbs]3970-the suburbs]3969-a normal girl from the suburbs . ”[122-claudia] [She]122-claudia rolls [her]122-claudia eyes in disgust . “ [You]0-i . . . with [a normal girl]3971-a normal girl ? Ha , what a joke . [I]122-claudia suppose [she]91-emily cooks and cleans and fusses over [you]0-i and sucks [your]0-i dick on command , does [she]91-emily ? ”[122-claudia] [I]0-i inhale to hold [my]0-i anger deeply . “ [She]91-emily ’s good for [me]0-i . ”[0-i] “ [I]122-claudia ’m good for [you]0-i , ”[122-claudia] [she]122-claudia fires back . “ As [a work colleague]3972-a work colleague or [employee]3973-employee , yes — as [a mate]3974-a mate . . . not so much . ”[122-claudia] [Her]122-claudia eyes fill with tears anew . “ [I]0-i ’m not good for [you]122-claudia . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug . “ [I]0-i ’m so busy that [I]0-i ca n’t be there for [you]0-i either . [You]0-i deserve to be doted on , but [I]0-i ca n’t do that from [New York]3-new york , [Claud]187-claud ; [you]0-i know [I]0-i ca n’t . There is no way around this situation . [Our]3975-our lives are traveling on different paths . [Two CEOs ca n’t]3976-two ceos ca n’t hold [their]3976-two ceos ca n’t careers and nurture a relationship from [different sides of [the world]268-the world]522-different sides of the world . It ’s an impossible task . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause as [I]0-i try to articulate what [I]0-i ’m saying . “ Until [I]1639-her met [her]1639-her . . . [I]1639-her did n’t realize what [we]3975-our were both missing out on . Both [me]1639-her and [you]0-i . ”[1639-her] [Her]1639-her eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ [I]1639-her wish it were [you]0-i telling [me]1639-her [you]0-i ’d met [someone]401-someone , so then [I]1639-her would n’t be saying this . [I]1639-her love [you]0-i , and [you]0-i ’re [the last person [I]1639-her want to hurt]3980-the last person i want to hurt . [I]1639-her would much rather [you]0-i hurt [me]1639-her . ”[1639-her] [She]1639-her walks over and drops to the couch as [she]1639-her processes the information . [I]0-i stay silent as [I]0-i watch [her]1639-her . “ So what now ? ”[1639-her] [she]1639-her asks . “ [I]1639-her ’m going [home]3076-home to move [her]1639-her into [[my]1639-her apartment]940-my apartment . ”[1639-her] [Her]1639-her face falls . “ What ? ”[1639-her] “ And [I]1639-her will be announcing [our]3983-our relationship . ”[1639-her] [She]1639-her drops [her]1639-her head in sadness . “ What ’s the rush ? ”[1639-her] “ [You]0-i know [me]1639-her — [I’m]1639-her all or nothing . ”[1639-her] [She]1639-her screws up [her]1639-her face in tears . “ Are [you]0-i going to marry [her]1639-her ? ”[1639-her] [I]0-i stay silent . “ [You]0-i asked [me]1639-her to marry [you]0-i four weeks after [we]3984-we met . Are [you]0-i . . . ”[1639-her] [Her]1639-her voice trails off in hurt . [I]0-i clench [my]0-i jaw to stop [myself]0-i from saying something [I]0-i ’ll regret . [She]1639-her drops [her]1639-her head , and [I]0-i watch as [she]1639-her cries for a moment . [I]0-i have to leave before [she]1639-her gets angry . “ [I]1639-her ’m going . ”[1639-her] [Her]1639-her haunted eyes come to [mine]0-i . “ [I]1639-her love [you]0-i , ”[1639-her] [she]1639-her whispers . [I]0-i smile sadly and take [her]1639-her in [my]0-i arms . “ [I]0-i love [you]1639-her too . ”[0-i] [We]1640-we hold [each other]351-each other for an extended time . “ Be happy , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper into [her]1639-her hair . “ How could [I]1639-her possibly be happy without [you]0-i , [Jameson]126-jameson ? ”[1639-her] [she]1639-her whispers . “ Do n’t go . ”[1639-her] “ [I]0-i have to . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pull out of [her]1639-her arms , and without another word [I]0-i turn and walk out of [[Claudia]122-claudia ’s terrace house]1642-claudia ’s terrace house . [I]0-i get into the back of [[my]0-i waiting car]1643-my waiting car and stare solemnly out the window as [it]1643-my waiting car pulls away . “ Goodbye , [Claudia]122-claudia , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as the scenery zooms by . “ Fly high , [baby]3139-baby . ”[0-i] [I]0-i get a lump in [my]0-i throat for all the good times [we]1644-we shared . “ [You]3139-baby deserve the best . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sprint [the last block]1645-the last block . It ’s four in the morning , and [I]0-i ’m running in [New York]3-new york . [I]0-i love [this city]1646-this city at night ; [it]1646-this city has a peace that daylight does n’t deliver . Last night at [the airport]276-the airport [I]0-i had [my]0-i fill of scotch and slept the entire flight [home]3076-home , and now [I]0-i ’m a ball of energy . [[My]0-i flight]1649-my flight landed at two o’clock , too late to go to [[Emily]91-emily ’s]1650-emily ’s . . . not that it ’s stopped [me]0-i from running here . [I]0-i pant as [I]0-i approach [[her]91-emily building]1651-her building , and [I]0-i stare up at it and go to the intercom . [My]0-i finger hovers over [her]91-emily button . [My]0-i chest rises and falls as [I]0-i hesitate . It ’s four o’clock , and [she]91-emily has to work tomorrow . Do n’t be selfish . Fuck , [I]0-i ca n’t help it with [her]91-emily — [I]0-i am selfish . [I]0-i want [her]91-emily around the clock . [I]0-i walk out onto [the street]654-the street and stand at the gutter with [my]0-i hands on [my]0-i hips as [I]0-i struggle for breath . Spits of rain begin to splatter , and [I]0-i look up at the sky . [I]0-i love running in the rain . It starts to really come down , and [I]0-i turn back and look up at [[Emily]91-emily ’s building]1653-emily ’s building . [I]0-i count the floors until [I]0-i get to [her]91-emily windows . [I]0-i imagine [her]91-emily sleeping in [her]91-emily bed with [her]91-emily long dark hair splayed across [her]91-emily pillow , [her]91-emily beautiful curvy body curled up like [she]91-emily does , and eyes that could talk [me]0-i into anything . Tomorrow . . . well , today now . [I]0-i smile up at [her]91-emily window as the rain really comes down , and [I]0-i turn and begin the long run [home]3076-home . Tomorrow [I]0-i start fresh with [Emily Foster]91-emily . [Emily]91-emily [I]0-i walk through the security check with a spring in [my]0-i step . [Jameson]126-jameson got [home]3076-home last night . [I]0-i get to see [him]126-jameson today . [I]0-i ’m so excited that [I]0-i even got up early and curled [my]0-i hair , and [I]0-i ’m wearing [my]0-i gray skirt in full swing . A week has never felt so long . [I]0-i take [the elevator]428-the elevator up to [[my]0-i floor]621-my floor and sit at [my]0-i desk . “ Hey , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron says over [his]110-aaron coffee cup . “ Hi there . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i smile . “ What ’s that look ? ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron smirks . “ [Jameson]126-jameson ’s [home]3076-home . ”[110-aaron] “ How do [you]110-aaron know ? ”[110-aaron] “ Well , [I]0-i hope [he]126-jameson ’s [home]3076-home . [He]126-jameson called [me]0-i from [the airport]276-the airport , and [he]126-jameson was all boozy , so [I]0-i ’m hoping [he]126-jameson made it onto [the plane]291-the plane . ”[0-i] [I]0-i look over to see [Hayden]113-hayden at [the photocopying machine area]1658-the photocopying machine area . [He]113-hayden ’s talking to [a group of girls]1659-a group of girls . “ How well do [you]113-hayden know [Hayden]113-hayden ? ”[113-hayden] [I]0-i ask . “ Hmm . ”[0-i] [He]113-hayden thinks for a moment . “ Not that well . [Molly]111-molly knows [him]113-hayden from [her]111-molly old job . ”[113-hayden] “ Where was that ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask as [I]0-i turn [my]0-i computer on . “ [They]3990-they worked at the Gazette together . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes flick to [him]113-hayden . “ [Molly]111-molly worked at [the Gazette]36-the gazette ? ”[0-i] “ Yeah , for years . [Miles Media]103-miles media headhunted [her]111-molly . ”[111-molly] Shit . A sinister thought crosses [my]0-i mind . No , not [Molly]111-molly . Do n’t be stupid . It could n’t be . Do n’t even think that . [Tristan]135-tristan and [I]0-i tested the theory over the last week , and every time [I]0-i gave [Hayden]113-hayden a story before four o’clock , it was printed in the Gazette the next day . There ’s definitely a correlation somewhere . Whether it ’s [Hayden]113-hayden or above [him]113-hayden , [we]1660-we ’re trying to find out . [I]0-i really like [Tristan]135-tristan ; [he]135-tristan ’s funny and intelligent and a lot softer around the edges than [[his]135-tristan brother]736-his brother . “ What happened with [Paul]131-paul last night ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [He]113-hayden turned up . ”[0-i] [He]113-hayden looks at [me]0-i sheepishly . “ Oh God , ”[0-i] [I]0-i mutter dryly . “ Do n’t tell [me]113-hayden [you]113-hayden slept with [him]113-hayden . ”[113-hayden] [He]113-hayden hits the keys on [his]113-hayden computer with force . “ Yep . [I]113-hayden ca n’t resist [that fucking asshole]3793-that fucking asshole . ”[113-hayden] “ Did [you]113-hayden have it out with [him]113-hayden yet ? ”[113-hayden] “ No . [I]113-hayden want to catch [him]113-hayden in the act . ”[113-hayden] “ So why are [you]113-hayden still fucking [him]113-hayden ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ For [God]88-god ’s sake , [Aaron]110-aaron , do n’t be used . ”[0-i] “ For the record , [I]113-hayden ’m using [him]113-hayden . ”[113-hayden] [He]113-hayden rolls [his]113-hayden eyes as [he]113-hayden sips [his]113-hayden coffee . “ [[Nobody]3121-nobody ’s dick]3993-nobody ’s dick is that good , ”[0-i] [I]0-i huff . “ Except [his]113-hayden . ”[0-i] [He]113-hayden sighs sadly . “ Ugh . ”[113-hayden] [I]0-i wince . “ Leave [me]0-i alone with [the asshole]3994-the asshole for five minutes with a carving knife . [I]0-i ’ll get it for [you]113-hayden to take away . ”[0-i] [He]113-hayden laughs , and [my]0-i phone rings . “ Hello . ”[113-hayden] “ Hi , [Emily]91-emily , this is [Sammia]116-sammia . ”[113-hayden] “ Oh , hi . ”[113-hayden] Excitement runs through [me]0-i . “ [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles would like to see [you]113-hayden in [[his]114-mr. miles office]496-his office right away , please . ”[0-i] A huge smile splits [my]0-i face . “ On [my]0-i way . ”[0-i] [I]0-i hang up and stand . “ Where are [you]113-hayden going ? ”[0-i] “ Oh , more training , ”[0-i] [I]0-i lie . “ Jesus , [you]113-hayden ’ll be more qualified than anyone on this floor soon . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i know . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ Back soon . ”[0-i] [I]0-i take [the elevator]428-the elevator up to [the top floor]467-the top floor , and the doors open . [I]0-i can hardly keep a straight face . [He]1664-he ’s here . [I]0-i want to run . “ Good morning , [Emily]91-emily . ”[116-sammia] [Sammia]116-sammia smiles . “ Just go through . ”[116-sammia] “ Morning . Okay , thanks . ”[0-i] [I]0-i walk through and down to [[Jameson]126-jameson ’s office]3491-jameson ’s office , and [I]0-i knock on the door . “ Come in , ”[1664-he] [his]1664-he deep velvety voice calls . [I]0-i open the door , and [his]1664-he eyes come to [me]0-i with the best “ come fuck [me]0-i ”[0-i] look [I]0-i ’ve ever seen . [My]0-i breath catches . Standing by the window in [his]1664-he navy suit and crisp white shirt , [he]1664-he is [the ultimate male specimen]1666-the ultimate male specimen . [I]0-i forgot how gorgeous [he]1664-he is . [He]1664-he gives [me]0-i a slow , sexy smile . “ Hello . ”[1664-he] “ Hi , ”[0-i] [I]0-i breathe . [I]0-i have to stop [myself]0-i from running to [him]1664-he . The air crackles between [us]1667-us , and [he]1664-he walks to [me]0-i and takes [my]0-i face in [his]1664-he hands and kisses [me]0-i , all suction and a little tongue . [I]0-i feel [my]0-i legs go weak at the knees . “ [I]1664-he ’ve missed [[my]1664-he girl]3996-my girl , ”[1664-he] [he]1664-he murmurs against [my]0-i lips . [I]0-i smile , and [he]1664-he wraps [my]0-i ponytail around [his]1664-he hand three times and pulls [my]0-i head back aggressively . [His]1664-he thick tongue goes to [my]0-i collarbone and licks up to [my]0-i neck . “ Have [you]0-i missed [me]1664-he ? ”[1664-he] [he]1664-he asks as [his]1664-he teeth nip [my]0-i neck . [I]0-i wince as arousal runs through [my]0-i blood like a river rapid . Jesus , [the CEO]3206-the ceo is back in all [his]1664-he glory . “ God , yes , ”[0-i] [I]0-i breathe . [He]1664-he kisses [me]0-i again , and the door opens . “ Hey , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan ’s voice calls before [he]1664-he stops instantly . “ Not now , [Tristan]135-tristan , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson says without letting [my]0-i ponytail go . [His]1664-he dark eyes stay fixed on [mine]0-i . [My]0-i heart races at the way [he]1664-he ’s looking at [me]0-i . [He]1664-he ’s different . . . more intense . “ Sorry , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan says before the door closes . [He]1664-he kisses [me]0-i again , [my]0-i head held back just as [he]1664-he wants [me]0-i . “ [I]1664-he want to make a go of this . ”[1664-he] “ Of what ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i breathe . “ Of [us]3997-we . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i thought [we]3997-we were ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ No . [We]3997-we were fucking before . Now [I]0-i want [you]0-i . ”[0-i] [He]1664-he bites [my]0-i neck , and [I]0-i whimper . “ [I]1664-he want all of [you]0-i . ”[1664-he] [His]1664-he hand grabs [my]0-i behind , and [he]1664-he pulls [me]0-i against [his]1664-he waiting hard cock . Oh jeez . . . welcome [home]3076-home . [I]0-i kiss [his]1664-he big lips . “ Okay . ”[0-i] [He]1664-he holds [my]0-i face in [his]1664-he hands and stares down at [me]0-i as the air leaves [my]0-i lungs . “ Tonight . [[My]1664-he place]3652-my place , ”[1664-he] [he]1664-he breathes . [I]0-i smile softly as [my]0-i sex begins to throb in anticipation . “ Yes . ”[0-i] “ Do [you]1664-he want to go out for dinner ? ”[0-i] “ No , [I]1664-he want to cook . Do [you]1664-he have groceries ? ”[1664-he] [His]1664-he brow furrows . “ [I]1664-he ’ll get [Alan]152-alan to pick something up . ”[1664-he] “ No . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ [I]0-i want to go to [the grocery store]3999-the grocery store . ”[0-i] [His]1664-he hands roam up and down [my]0-i body as if [he]1664-he does n’t know where to start . “ Take [the limo]811-the limo . ”[1664-he] [I]0-i screw up [my]0-i face . “ [I]1664-he ’m not going to [the grocery store]3999-the grocery store in [a limo]1418-a limo . ”[1664-he] [He]1664-he grabs [my]0-i hand and places it over the huge erection in [his]1664-he suit pants , and [I]0-i grab it as [his]1664-he eyes flicker in arousal . “ [I]1664-he need [you]0-i , ”[1664-he] [he]1664-he breathes as [he]1664-he bites [my]0-i bottom lip . “ Oh God , [me]1664-he too . ”[1664-he] [I]0-i pull out of [his]1664-he grip as [I]0-i pant . “ [I]0-i have to get back to work . ”[0-i] God . . . it would be so easy to stay here and fuck [the boss]1670-the boss instead . “ [I]1670-the boss ’ll have [Alan]152-alan deliver [the car]422-the car to [you]0-i . [You]0-i use it from now on . ”[1670-the boss] “ [The car]422-the car ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . [He]1664-he has [a car]1671-a car ? “ Just use it as [your]0-i own . ”[1664-he] [His]1664-he hands grind [me]0-i onto [his]1664-he body . [He]1664-he ’s completely preoccupied with arousal . “ [I]1664-he only need it to do groceries just today . Do n’t bother [Alan]152-alan . [I]1664-he can get it from [[your]1664-he apartment]3695-your apartment . ”[1664-he] “ [[Our]4006-our apartment]4007-our apartment . ”[1664-he] [He]1664-he bites [my]0-i neck as [he]1664-he really begins to eat [me]0-i . Goose bumps scatter all over [my]0-i body . “ Huh ? ”[1664-he] “ [You]1664-he ’ll be moving in with [me]1664-he . ”[1664-he] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i pull out of [his]1664-he arms as [my]0-i arousal fog temporarily lifts . “ What did [you]1664-he say ? ”[0-i] [His]1664-he dark eyes dance with delight . “ If [I]1664-he ’m doing this , [I]1664-he ’m fucking doing this . ”[1664-he] [I]0-i stare at [him]1664-he . What the hell ? “ [I]0-i do n’t do things by half , [Emily]91-emily . If [you]91-emily ’re with [me]0-i , [you]91-emily ’re with [me]0-i . ”[0-i] “ [Jameson]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Have [you]1664-he gone crazy ? ”[0-i] “ [I]1664-he have meetings scheduled back to back all day , or [I]1664-he would be bending [you]0-i over [my]1664-he desk right now . ”[1664-he] [He]1664-he turns [me]0-i around and slaps [me]0-i on the behind . “ Now get back to work before [I]1664-he do it . ”[1664-he] [I]0-i pant as [I]0-i stare at the door . A visual of [me]0-i lying across [his]1664-he desk with [my]0-i legs open swirls through [my]0-i head . How am [I]0-i supposed to string two thoughts together after [he]1664-he says that ? “ Yes , [sir]3064-sir . ”[0-i] [I]0-i begin to walk to the door . “ Oh , and [Emily]91-emily , ”[1664-he] [he]1664-he calls in [his]1664-he commanding voice . [I]0-i turn . “ [I]1664-he will be announcing today that [we]4009-we are in a relationship . ”[1664-he] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i stare at [him]1664-he . Confusion swirls around in [my]0-i head . “ Why ? ”[1664-he] “ Because [I]1664-he hate speculation . ”[1664-he] [He]1664-he pauses as [his]1664-he eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ And [I]1664-he want [everyone]3098-everyone to know that [you]0-i ’re [mine]1664-he . ”[1664-he] [I]0-i stare at [him]1664-he . Huh ? [His]1664-he . [I]0-i have no words . . . rendered completely speechless . “ Oh . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stare at [him]1664-he . “ Okay ? ”[1664-he] [I]0-i turn and walk toward [the foyer]799-the foyer . “ Goodbye , ”[0-i] [I]0-i mutter , distracted . Either [Jameson Miles]126-jameson has gone completely crazy , or [I]0-i am in [a parallel universe]1673-a parallel universe . Two hours later , [I]0-i sit and stare at [my]0-i computer . [I]0-i was too freaked out to talk about this morning ’s Twilight Zone encounter in [[Jameson]126-jameson ’s office]3491-jameson ’s office when [I]0-i returned . It ’s taken [me]0-i this long to get [my]0-i head around what [he]1664-he said . [I]0-i ’ve come to the conclusion that [he]1664-he ’s obviously jet lagged to holy hell and is suffering some kind of delusion . [My]0-i phone dances across [my]0-i desk , and [my]0-i favorite letter appears . J. [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i answer . “ Hello , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles . ”[0-i] “ How ’s [[my]1664-he girl]3996-my girl ? ”[1664-he] [his]1664-he sexy voice purrs down the line . “ Are [you]3996-my girl feeling all right ? ”[1664-he] [I]0-i frown . “ [I]1664-he ’m feeling great . Why ? ”[1664-he] “ [You]3996-my girl just seem very . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause as [I]0-i think of the right word . “ Odd . ”[0-i] [He]1664-he laughs [his]1664-he deep velvety laugh , and [I]0-i feel it all the way to [my]0-i bones . “ [I]1664-he do n’t feel odd . ”[1664-he] “ [You]3996-my girl ’re acting odd . ”[1664-he] “ [I]1664-he ’m just calling to tell [you]1664-he that [we]4012-we have a dinner tomorrow night . ”[1664-he] “ What dinner ? ”[1664-he] “ The Media Awards , ”[1664-he] [he]1664-he replies calmly . “ The Media Awards , ”[0-i] [I]0-i repeat . “ Yes , that ’s what [I]0-i said . ”[0-i] [I]0-i look around at [[my]0-i two work friends , who are completely oblivious to the crazy shit that ’s coming out of [[my]0-i running partner]1676-my running partner ’s mouth]1675-my two work friends , who are completely oblivious to the crazy shit that ’s coming out of my running partner ’s mouth . “ Where is it ? ”[1675-my two work friends , who are completely oblivious to the crazy shit that ’s coming out of my running partner ’s mouth] “ Here in [New York]3-new york . [[My]0-i entire family]4013-my entire family will be [there]3073-there . [You]0-i ’ll get to meet [everyone]3098-everyone . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes widen in horror . “ Well , what ’s the dress code ? ”[0-i] “ Black tie . ”[0-i] [I]0-i feel the blood drain from [my]0-i face . “ [I]0-i do n’t have any evening dresses here , ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . [I]0-i do n’t have any at [home]3076-home either , but [he]1676-my running partner does n’t need to know that . “ That ’s okay . [I]1676-my running partner ’ll have some things delivered [home]3076-home tonight , and [you]0-i can pick what [you]0-i want to wear . ”[1676-my running partner] [I]0-i scratch [my]0-i head in confusion . “ [I]0-i ’ll just come to the next one , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say . “ [I]0-i ’ll wait at [home]3076-home in bed for [you]1676-my running partner . The Media Awards are n’t really [my]0-i jam . ”[0-i] “ [Emily]91-emily , ”[1676-my running partner] [he]1676-my running partner says calmly . “ Yes . ”[1676-my running partner] “ [You]0-i are coming with [me]0-i . ”[0-i] “ [Jay]158-jay , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i feel nerves rise in [my]0-i throat . “ [I]0-i ’ll see [you]1676-my running partner tonight . [I]0-i ’ll be a little late as [I]0-i have a conference call . [Alan]152-alan is going to meet [you]0-i out the side entrance at five with the keys to [the car]422-the car and [the apartment]3531-the apartment . ”[0-i] “ Okay . ”[0-i] [I]0-i puff air into [my]0-i cheeks . “ See [you]1676-my running partner then . ”[0-i] [I]0-i hang up and put [my]0-i head into [my]0-i hands . “ What ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly asks . “ [Jameson]126-jameson has gone insane . ”[111-molly] “ Why ? ”[0-i] “ [He]126-jameson told [me]110-aaron this morning that [I]110-aaron ’m moving in with [him]126-jameson , and now [he]126-jameson wants [me]110-aaron to go to some awards dinner with [[his]126-jameson entire family]4020-his entire family tomorrow night . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron ’s and [Molly]111-molly ’s eyes widen . “ What ? ”[110-aaron] “ And [he]126-jameson gave [me]0-i [[his]126-jameson car]4021-his car to use , but [I]0-i do n’t even know where [a grocery store]4022-a grocery store is in [New York]3-new york . ”[0-i] “ Oh , [you]0-i would go to [the one on [Fifth]37-fifth]4023-the one on fifth . ”[0-i] “ Well , how do [I]0-i get [there]3073-there ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ [It]4023-the one on fifth ’s on [my]0-i way . [I]0-i can go with [you]0-i if [you]0-i want , and [I]0-i ’ll get on [the subway]3572-the subway from there . ”[0-i] “ Are [you]0-i sure ? ”[0-i] “ Yeah , [I]0-i have n’t got [the kids]3241-the kids this week anyway . It ’s not like [I]0-i ’m doing anything . ”[0-i] It ’s five in the afternoon , and [we]1678-we have just finished work . “ Where did [he]4027-he say it would be ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly asks as [she]111-molly links [her]111-molly arm through [mine]0-i as [we]1678-we exit [the Miles Media building]624-the miles media building through the front doors . “ Around here to the side exit . ”[111-molly] “ What are [you]0-i going to cook ? ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly asks . “ Hmm , rib eye with a mushroom sauce , honey carrots , and broccolini . ”[111-molly] “ Hmm , yum . [Lucky bastard]4028-lucky bastard . Wish [someone]401-someone was coming over to cook that shit for [me]111-molly . ”[111-molly] “ True . ”[1678-we] [We]1678-we turn the corner and look up and both stop dead on the spot . “ What the fuck ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [Alan]152-alan is standing next to what looks like a time machine , and [my]0-i eyes widen in horror . Black , low slung , and [the sportiest looking car [I]0-i ’ve ever seen]1680-the sportiest looking car i ’ve ever seen . The mag wheels alone probably cost more than [an average car]1681-an average car . [Alan]152-alan smiles warmly . “ Hello , [Emily]91-emily . ”[152-alan] [I]0-i look at [the car]422-the car and then at [the people walking past]1683-the people walking past as [they]1683-the people walking past stare at it . “ Hi . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan passes [me]0-i the key and then a card . “ This is for [the car]422-the car , and this is [your]91-emily new key to [the apartment]3531-the apartment . ”[152-alan] [I]0-i stare at [them]1684-them in [my]0-i hand . “ This is [the car]422-the car ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as the blood drains from [my]0-i face . [He]152-alan chuckles at [my]0-i reaction . [Molly]111-molly puts [her]111-molly hands over [her]111-molly mouth and begins to laugh nervously , reminding [me]0-i that [she]111-molly ’s here . “ This is [Molly]111-molly , [[my]0-i friend]3515-my friend , ”[0-i] [I]0-i introduce [her]111-molly . “ Hello . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly smiles . “ [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles asked [me]111-molly to make a time with [you]0-i to move [your]0-i things out of [[your]0-i apartment]3695-your apartment . ”[111-molly] [My]0-i eyes nearly pop from their sockets . “ What ? ”[111-molly] “ Would Saturday morning suit [you]0-i ? [I]0-i can arrange a packing service . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes flick to [Molly]111-molly as [she]111-molly stares wide eyed at [me]0-i . Okay , what the actual fuck is going on here ? “ [I]0-i ’ll get back to [you]1685-you on that , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply . [He]1685-you smiles kindly . “ Okay . ”[1685-you] [He]1685-you opens the car door . “ So [you]0-i know how to drive a manual , obviously . ”[1685-you] “ Can [you]1685-you just hold on a minute . ”[0-i] [I]0-i hold [my]0-i finger up . “ Just a minute . ”[0-i] [I]0-i turn [my]0-i back on [them]1686-them and dial [Jameson]126-jameson ’s number . “ Hello , ”[1685-you] [his]1685-you sexy voice purrs . “ What the hell kind of car is this ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ A Bugatti . ”[0-i] “ What ’s that ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i turn back and look at [it]1687-it . “ A Bugatti [Veyron]38-veyron . It ’s a limited edition . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i ca n’t drive this , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper angrily . “ Why not ? ”[0-i] “ Well . ”[0-i] [I]0-i look around in a fluster . “ [I]0-i ’m not [a very good driver]4035-a very good driver , [Jameson]126-jameson . [I]0-i ’m going to crash this thing for sure . ”[0-i] [He]1685-you laughs , and it ’s deep and velvety and makes [me]0-i smile . “ [I]1685-you assure [you]0-i , [Emily]91-emily , [anyone]295-anyone can drive [this car]4037-this car . [It]4037-this car practically drives [itself]4037-this car . Relax . [You]0-i ’ll be fine . ”[1685-you] “ When [you]1685-you said [you]1685-you had [a car]1671-a car , [I]0-i thought [you]1685-you meant [you]1685-you had [a Toyota]4039-a toyota . . . like [a normal person]4040-a normal person , ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . “ What if [I]0-i crash it ? ”[0-i] “ As long as [you]1685-you ’re not injured , [I]1685-you do n’t care . ”[1685-you] “ [Jameson]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [Babe]188-babe , [I]1688-i ’m in a staff meeting right now with [twenty people]4041-twenty people sitting here . Get what [you]188-babe need , and [I]1688-i ’ll meet [you]188-babe at [home]3076-home , ”[1688-i] [he]1688-i says calmly . “ Oh [my]1688-i God , ”[1688-i] [I]0-i cry as [I]0-i get an image of [all [his]1688-i staff]1689-all his staff listening . “ Goodbye . ”[1688-i] [I]0-i hang up in a rush . [I]0-i come back to [Alan]152-alan and [Molly]111-molly , and [they]1690-they both wait for [me]0-i to say something . “ It seems [Jameson]126-jameson has gone completely crazy , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i stare at the time machine . [Alan]152-alan chuckles , and [Molly]111-molly stares at [the car]422-the car in disbelief . “ [I]0-i thought it would be [a Toyota]4039-a toyota . ”[0-i] [I]0-i wince . [Alan]152-alan smiles and opens the driver ’s side door . “ [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles does n’t do Toyota , [Emily]91-emily . ”[0-i] [I]0-i get in , and [Molly]111-molly sits in the passenger seat . “ Where are [you]91-emily going ? ”[152-alan] [Alan]152-alan asks . “ [Vegas]39-vegas . ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly laughs . “ [We]4044-we ’re going to [Vegas]39-vegas . How much is [this car]4037-this car worth , [Alan]152-alan ? ”[111-molly] “ [It]4037-this car came in at around two million dollars , [I]111-molly think . ”[111-molly] “ Holy fuck , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly shrieks . “ Get in , [Alan]152-alan ; [we]4044-we really are going to fucking [Vegas]39-vegas . ”[111-molly] [I]0-i put [my]0-i head down on the steering wheel and burst out laughing . “ This is unbelievable . ”[0-i] “ [You]0-i ’ll be fine . ”[152-alan] [Alan]152-alan laughs as [he]152-alan leans in and starts [the car]422-the car . [It]422-the car purrs like a kitten . “ Blinker , brake , reverse . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan points to all the dials and knobs . “ Take it slow . It flies . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan closes the door , and [I]0-i put the blinker on . [I]0-i slowly take off into the traffic to the sound of [Molly]111-molly screaming and laughing in excitement , and as soon as [I]0-i get out of sight of [Alan]152-alan , [I]0-i burst out laughing too . “ What the fuck is going on ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i cry . Two hours later , [I]0-i pull into [the underground parking lot of [Jameson]126-jameson ’s building]1693-the underground parking lot of jameson ’s building . [I]0-i know why [he]152-alan takes [the damn limo]1694-the damn limo — finding [a parking spot in [this city]1646-this city]1695-a parking spot in this city is insane . In the end , [I]0-i made [Molly]111-molly sit in [the car]422-the car in [the parking lot]1698-the parking lot and wait for [me]0-i while [I]0-i grabbed what [I]0-i needed , and then [I]0-i drove [her]111-molly [home]3076-home . [I]0-i was petrified [someone]401-someone was going to steal it . [Alan]152-alan is waiting , and [he]152-alan guides [me]0-i into [the garage]3930-the garage , where [I]0-i park . “ Thank [you]152-alan . ”[152-alan] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i get the groceries out of the trunk . “ This is [a poser car]4046-a poser car , ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . [He]152-alan smirks as [he]152-alan takes the bags from [me]0-i , and [we]1702-we begin walking to [the elevator]428-the elevator . “ Did [you]0-i lock [the car]422-the car , [Emily]91-emily ? ”[152-alan] [he]152-alan reminds [me]0-i . “ Oh yeah . ”[152-alan] [I]0-i turn and hold the remote up , and it blips as it locks . [I]0-i giggle . “ Oops . ”[0-i] [We]1702-we get into [the elevator]428-the elevator , and [he]152-alan stays silent and looking straight ahead . “ How long have [you]152-alan worked for [Jameson]126-jameson ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Ten years . ”[0-i] “ Oh . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ That ’s a long time . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan smiles . “ Yes , [he]126-jameson ’s very good to [me]152-alan . ”[152-alan] [We]1702-we get to the top , and [Alan]152-alan opens the door and walks in and puts the groceries on the counter . “ Do [you]0-i need anything ? ”[152-alan] [he]152-alan asks . “ [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles is still in [his]114-mr. miles meeting . [He]114-mr. miles will be at least another half an hour . ”[152-alan] [My]0-i eyes hold [his]152-alan , and [I]0-i want to ask [him]152-alan a million questions about [the enigmatic Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles . “ Do [you]152-alan speak to [him]114-mr. miles often throughout the day ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ No . ”[0-i] [He]152-alan smiles at the suggestion . “ [I]152-alan am in constant contact with [[his]114-mr. miles PA]4048-his pa . ”[152-alan] “ Oh . ”[152-alan] “ [[His]114-mr. miles masseuse]1221-his masseuse is expected [here]275-here at seven . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan glances at [his]152-alan watch . “ Would [you]152-alan like [me]152-alan to wait for [her]1221-his masseuse ? ”[152-alan] “ [Her]1221-his masseuse ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ Oh . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan corrects [himself]152-alan . “ It ’s a [him]114-mr. miles now , is n’t it ? ”[152-alan] Something tells [me]0-i that [Alan]152-alan knows a lot more about [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles than [he]152-alan makes out . “ No , [I]152-alan ’m fine . [I]152-alan ’ll let [him]114-mr. miles in . ”[152-alan] [I]0-i fake a smile . “ Thank [you]152-alan . ”[0-i] [I]0-i show [him]152-alan to the door . “ Call [me]0-i if [you]152-alan need anything . ”[0-i] [He]152-alan smiles . “ Okay , thanks . ”[152-alan] [I]0-i walk back to [the kitchen]818-the kitchen and begin to put the groceries away , and the doorbell chimes . “ Hello , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say as [I]0-i push the intercom . “ Hello , [I]0-i ’m here for the massage . ”[0-i] “ Come up . ”[0-i] [I]0-i open the door and wait for [him]152-alan to arrive . “ Hello . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan smiles . “ [Same room]4051-same room as last time ? ”[152-alan] “ Yes , please . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan takes off down [the hallway]1386-the hallway to set up . The door clicks open , and [Jameson]126-jameson comes into view . Every time [I]0-i see [him]126-jameson in a suit , [I]0-i am reminded of exactly who [he]126-jameson is . [Power personified]1707-power personified . “ Hello . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan smiles as [he]152-alan takes [me]0-i into [his]152-alan arms . “ Hi . ”[152-alan] [His]152-alan lips dust [mine]0-i , and [I]0-i melt into [his]152-alan touch . “ [[Your]152-alan car]3532-your car is ridiculous . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . [He]152-alan chuckles as [he]152-alan takes [my]0-i jaw in [his]152-alan hand ; then [he]152-alan kisses [me]0-i deeper , and [my]0-i hands go around [his]152-alan broad neck . The intercom sounds again . “ For God ’s sake , [this place]459-this place is like [an airport]4054-an airport , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper , annoyed that [my]0-i kiss is being interrupted . “ Oh , that ’s [the stylists]4055-the stylists with [your]0-i dresses , ”[152-alan] [he]152-alan says . “ [Your]0-i masseuse is set up in [the end room]4056-the end room . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan kisses [me]0-i again . “ Let [them]4057-them in , and choose what [you]0-i want . ”[152-alan] “ [Jay]158-jay , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [my]0-i eyes search [his]152-alan . This change in [him]152-alan is confusing [me]0-i . “ Get a few . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan grabs [my]0-i behind . “ [I]152-alan ’m going to take a quick shower . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan disappears up [the hall]729-the hall , and [I]0-i open the front door . [My]0-i face falls when [I]0-i see [the two gorgeous women]1709-the two gorgeous women pushing a huge garment rack of gorgeous dresses . “ Hello . ”[1709-the two gorgeous women] [One]3905-one is tall with long dark hair , and [the other]1711-the other is blonde and beautiful . [Both]1712-both have that trendy , confident vibe . “ Hello , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles ordered some dresses , ”[1713-the blonde] [the blonde]1713-the blonde says . “ [I]1713-the blonde ’m [Celeste]189-celeste , and this is [Saba]190-saba . ”[1713-the blonde] “ Yes , please come in , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper , embarrassed . “ [I]0-i ’m [Emily]91-emily . ”[0-i] [We]1714-we shake hands . God , do n’t tell [me]0-i [they]1709-the two gorgeous women are going to watch [me]0-i try this shit on ? How mortifying . “ Just in here . ”[0-i] [I]0-i show [them]1709-the two gorgeous women to [the living area]939-the living area , and [they]1709-the two gorgeous women start to unpack shoes and accessories as [I]0-i watch awkwardly . This seems all very over the top . “ Back in a moment . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . [I]0-i turn and take off up to [the bedroom]925-the bedroom , and [I]0-i burst into [the bathroom]328-the bathroom to find [Jay]158-jay washing under the shower . “ What the hell is going on ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper in a panic . “ What ? ”[0-i] [He]158-jay frowns , totally oblivious . “ [Two Penthouse Pets]4058-two penthouse pets are out there with a load of dresses that are way too exotic for [me]0-i , and [I]0-i ’m driving around in a fucking space machine , and [you]158-jay ’re saying [I]0-i ’m moving in , and [I]0-i ’m freaking the fucking hell out , [Jameson]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i blurt out in a rush . [He]158-jay smirks as [he]158-jay turns the taps off . “ Just go out there , and pick what [you]0-i like , [Emily]91-emily . Do n’t overthink this . ”[158-jay] “ Do n’t overthink this , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ It ’s overthunk already . ”[0-i] “ Overthunk is n’t a word , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay says casually as [he]158-jay dries [himself]158-jay . “ Oh [my]158-jay God , ”[158-jay] [I]0-i stammer in a fluster at [his]158-jay lack of care , and [I]0-i storm back out to [the stylists]4055-the stylists . “ Sorry , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say as [I]0-i stand next to the rack of clothes . [I]0-i twist [my]0-i fingers nervously in front of [me]0-i . “ Tell [me]0-i about [your]158-jay style . ”[0-i] [The blonde]1713-the blonde smiles . “ What makes [you]158-jay pop ? ”[1713-the blonde] [I]0-i stare at [her]1713-the blonde . Oh jeez . What the fuck is this bullshit ? “ Umm . ”[0-i] [I]0-i look at the dresses on the rack . “ What makes [you]158-jay come alive and feel sexy ? ”[1720-the brunette] [the brunette]1720-the brunette gushes . “ When are [you]158-jay living [your]158-jay best life ? ”[1720-the brunette] Oh , Jesus . . . not this . “ [I]1720-the brunette ’ll just”—I[1720-the brunette] gesture to the rack of clothes—“see what [I]0-i like . ”[0-i] [I]0-i begin to flick through the dresses . Wow . . . they ’re all beautiful . “ Anything [you]158-jay like , [sweetheart]3764-sweetheart ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i hear [Jameson]126-jameson ’s deep voice purr from behind [me]0-i . [I]0-i turn to see [him]126-jameson with a white towel around [his]126-jameson waist . [His]126-jameson hair is wet , and [his]126-jameson tanned muscles are bulging . [He]126-jameson looks fucking edible . [The two bimbos]1721-the two bimbos ’ eyes bulge from [their]1721-the two bimbos sockets . “ Hello , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles , ”[1721-the two bimbos] [they]1721-the two bimbos both stammer as [their]1721-the two bimbos eyes drop down [his]126-jameson body . “ Hello . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles sexily . [I]0-i look at [him]126-jameson deadpan . Is [he]126-jameson for real ? “ [I]0-i ’m not sure . [I]0-i like everything , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap as [I]0-i turn back to the rack . In a fucking towel . . . what next ? Ugh . [He]126-jameson comes behind [me]0-i and puts one hand on [my]0-i hip as [he]126-jameson goes through the rack . “ [We]1721-the two bimbos ’ll take [this one]3959-this one , this one . . . this one . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson scans the rest of the rack . “ And all of these from here on . ”[126-jameson] “ Yes , [sir]3064-sir , ”[1721-the two bimbos] [they]1721-the two bimbos both gush . [His]126-jameson eyes go over the shoes and lingerie [they]1721-the two bimbos have laid out on the coffee table . “ [We]1721-the two bimbos ’ll take all of the lingerie and whatever shoes [Emily]91-emily chooses . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson eyes come to [me]0-i , and [he]126-jameson smiles and leans in and kisses [me]0-i . “ Done . ”[126-jameson] [The two women]1722-the two women hold [their]1722-the two women breath as [they]1722-the two women watch . [His]126-jameson hand drops to [my]0-i behind , and [he]126-jameson gives [me]0-i a firm squeeze . “ Nice to meet [you]1098-the girls , [girls]3583-girls , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says before [he]126-jameson saunters up [the hall]729-the hall for [his]126-jameson massage . [I]0-i turn back to [the girls]1098-the girls as [they]1098-the girls watch [him]126-jameson disappear in awe . Good grief . [I]0-i think [I]0-i just met [the real Jameson Miles]126-jameson . . . in all [his]126-jameson glory . Chapter 17 [I]0-i stir the mushroom sauce with [my]0-i mind in overdrive . [Jameson]126-jameson ’s different . . . [I]0-i ’m talking Twilight Zone different . [I]0-i ’m not sure if it ’s a good thing or the beginning of the end for [us]1725-we . Just when [I]0-i get used to [his]126-jameson old weirdness , [he]126-jameson ups the ante . [The masseuse]1726-the masseuse has just left , and [he]126-jameson ’s in the shower again as [he]126-jameson washes the oil off . [I]0-i ’m not going in [there]3073-there because [we]1725-we will end up having sex , and dinner is nearly ready . . . and [I]0-i want to talk to [him]126-jameson without [my]0-i arousal high clouding [my]0-i brain cells . It happens a lot with [him]126-jameson . [He]126-jameson walks back out in [his]126-jameson towel , and [his]126-jameson eyes find [me]0-i across [the room]613-the room . [He]126-jameson gives [me]0-i a slow , sexy smile . “ Can [you]126-jameson not walk around in a towel when [we]1725-we have [visitors]3219-visitors , please ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . [He]126-jameson smirks . “ [Those two ditzy shoppers]4064-those two ditzy shoppers are at [home]3076-home going to [town]3306-town on [their]4064-those two ditzy shoppers vibrators at this very moment as [they]4064-those two ditzy shoppers picture [you]0-i in that white towel . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . “ Living their”—I[126-jameson] hold [my]0-i fingers up to accentuate [my]0-i point—“best life . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson chuckles as [he]126-jameson takes [me]0-i in [his]126-jameson arms . “ Jealous ? ”[126-jameson] “ Yes , [I]0-i am , actually . [I]0-i do n’t like [other women]1230-other women looking at [you]126-jameson . It makes [me]0-i stabby , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap as [I]0-i stir the sauce . “ Cut it out with the sexy smiling around [other women]1230-other women too . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson lips come to [my]0-i neck as [he]126-jameson holds [me]0-i from behind , and [I]0-i can feel [his]126-jameson erection up against [my]0-i behind . “ Let ’s go to bed . ”[126-jameson] “ No , [you]126-jameson ’re eating first . ”[0-i] [I]0-i point to the [kitchen]926-kitchen counter . “ Sit . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson eyes dance in delight , and [he]126-jameson does as [he]126-jameson ’s told . [I]0-i place [his]126-jameson dinner in front of [him]126-jameson . “ Hmm , looks good . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles . [I]0-i sit beside [him]126-jameson and watch [him]126-jameson for a moment as [he]126-jameson eats . “ Why did [you]0-i ask [Alan]152-alan to move [my]126-jameson stuff in [here]275-here ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson chews [his]126-jameson steak . “ Because [I]126-jameson want [you]0-i to move in . ”[126-jameson] “ Since when ? [We]4070-we have n’t discussed this at all . ”[126-jameson] “ Yes , [we]4070-we have . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson swallows [his]126-jameson food . “ [We]4070-we talked about it this morning . ”[126-jameson] “ When ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ When [I]0-i told [you]126-jameson that [I]0-i wanted to do this , and [you]126-jameson said [me]0-i too . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson , [my]0-i mind a clusterfuck of confusion . “ [Jameson]126-jameson , doing this is in [my]126-jameson mind holding hands in public and dating . Maybe meeting [[each other]351-each other ’s families]4072-each other ’s families . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson frowns as [he]126-jameson watches [me]0-i . “ What ’s with the sudden change ? Last week [you]126-jameson got angry with [me]126-jameson for falling in love with [you]126-jameson . [I]126-jameson could n’t even look at [you]126-jameson after sex without [you]126-jameson getting upset with [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson sips [his]126-jameson wine , obviously annoyed . “ [You]126-jameson said [you]126-jameson did n’t love [me]126-jameson . Are [you]126-jameson saying that now [you]126-jameson do ? ”[126-jameson] “ That ’s not the point . [You]126-jameson know what [I]126-jameson mean . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson want [us]4073-us to make a go of it . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson shrugs . “ So today [I]126-jameson moved forward with [my]126-jameson plans . ”[126-jameson] “ Plans ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ [I]0-i ’m not a business transaction , [Jameson]126-jameson . [You]126-jameson do n’t move forward with [your]126-jameson plans without talking to [me]0-i first . They are n’t just [your]126-jameson plans , [you]126-jameson know . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson clenches [his]126-jameson jaw , unimpressed , as [his]126-jameson eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ There are [two people in this relationship]4074-two people in this relationship , [Jay]158-jay , and [me]126-jameson loving [you]158-jay does not mean [you]158-jay get to take [me]126-jameson over . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson know that , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson snaps . “ So [you]126-jameson do love [me]126-jameson now ? Make up [your]126-jameson mind , [woman]3347-woman . ”[126-jameson] “ Stop changing the subject . Do [you]126-jameson understand what [I]126-jameson ’m saying to [you]126-jameson ? ”[126-jameson] “ Yes , [Emily]91-emily . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson sighs as if [he]126-jameson ’s getting lectured by [the school principal]1730-the school principal . “ [I]0-i just do n’t know why [you]126-jameson ’ve had this sudden change of heart . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug . “ It ’s peculiar . ”[0-i] “ [My]1731-his ex heart has n’t changed at all . [My]1731-his ex situation has . ”[1731-his ex] “ What does that mean ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . [He]126-jameson exhales heavily . “ [I]126-jameson went and saw [Claudia]122-claudia in [London]8-london . ”[126-jameson] Oh no , [[his]126-jameson ex]1731-his ex . [I]0-i ’m not supposed to know that . [I]0-i had better play dumb . “ Who ’s [Claudia]122-claudia ? ”[0-i] “ [[My]0-i ex]315-my ex . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i try [my]0-i hardest to hold [my]0-i tongue . Act calm , act calm . “ [I]0-i broke it off with [her]122-claudia . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes widen in horror . “ What the hell ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ [You]0-i were still with [her]122-claudia ? ”[0-i] “ No , but [we]4077-we had promised [each other]351-each other that [we]4077-we would n’t date [anyone else]632-anyone else seriously . ”[0-i] [I]0-i begin to break into a cold sweat as [I]0-i try to hold it together . “ Why ? ”[0-i] “ Because [we]4077-we planned on getting back together in a few years . ”[0-i] [I]0-i knew it ; [I]0-i knew it back then that something was off . Damn it , why did n’t [I]0-i see the writing on the wall ? [I]0-i pick up [my]0-i wineglass and drain it as [I]0-i stare at [him]1732-i . Jeez , this is news . Bad news . “ [I]1732-i told [her]4080-her [I]1732-i have strong feelings for [you]1732-i . ”[1732-i] “ [You]1732-i did ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown as a tiny piece of hope blooms in [my]0-i chest . [He]1732-i smiles and tucks a piece of hair behind [my]0-i ear . “ [I]1732-i did . ”[1732-i] “ What else did [you]1732-i say ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask calmly . [I]0-i want to blurt out a million questions about the two of [them]1733-us . “ That it was over between [us]1733-us . ”[0-i] “ Did [you]1732-i love [her]4080-her ? ”[1732-i] “ Yes . ”[1732-i] [He]1732-i pauses for a moment as if contemplating that statement . “ In [my]1732-i own way , [I]1732-i did . In hindsight , [I]1732-i realize that [our]1733-us relationship was never normal . Not like [ours]1733-us is anyway . ”[1732-i] [I]0-i stare at [him]1732-i , lost for words . Grateful that [he]1732-i ’s finally being honest and yet terrified that [their]1733-us union was so strong that it withstood an open relationship . There ’s no way in hell [I]0-i could ever do that . “ [You]1732-i think [our]1733-us relationship is normal ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . [He]1732-i smiles and leans in and kisses [me]0-i softly . “ Do n’t [you]0-i ? ”[1732-i] “ No . To [me]0-i [our]1733-us relationship is exciting and wonderful and exotic . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stare at [him]1732-i . “ Normal gets boring very quick , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[1732-i] “ [I]1732-i told [her]4081-her that [I]1732-i want to build a future with [you]126-jameson . ”[1732-i] Okay , that sounds a bit better . [I]0-i smirk as [I]0-i try to hold in a smile . “ [I]0-i also told [her]4081-her that [I]0-i ’ve had feelings for [you]126-jameson since the day [we]1733-us met and that [you]126-jameson are [the only woman [I]0-i want to be with]4082-the only woman i want to be with from here on in . ”[0-i] A broad , goofy smile does break through this time . “ Did [you]1732-i tell [her]4081-her [I]0-i had motorized sneakers ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [He]1732-i chuckles , and [his]1732-i eyes twinkle with something special as [he]1732-i cups [my]0-i face in [his]1732-i hand . “ [I]1732-i did . ”[1732-i] “ What does this mean , [Jay]158-jay ? ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes search [his]1732-i . “ For [us]1733-us . ”[0-i] “ It means that [I]1732-i ’m all [yours]126-jameson . ”[1732-i] [He]1732-i shrugs . “ If [you]0-i want [me]1732-i . ”[1732-i] What ? All mine ? [I]0-i blink . . . in shock . “ Have [you]1732-i been holding [yourself]1732-i back from [me]0-i all this time ? ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i have , and [I]0-i ca n’t do it any longer . ”[0-i] “ What does this mean . . . for [us]1733-us ? ”[0-i] “ It means [I]0-i want [you]0-i to move in , and [we]1733-us go full steam ahead from here . ”[0-i] “ What ’s the rush ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ Ca n’t [we]1733-us ease into it ? ”[0-i] [He]1732-i leans in and kisses [me]0-i softly ; [his]1732-i big blue eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ [I]1732-i do n’t do things in halves , [Emily]91-emily . ”[1732-i] “ Meaning ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Meaning that [[my]0-i woman]4083-my woman is [[my]0-i world]4084-my world . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stare at [him]1732-i as the air leaves [my]0-i lungs . “ [I]1732-i work hard . . . but [I]1732-i love harder . ”[1732-i] [My]0-i heartbeat sounds through [my]0-i ears . Is this really happening ? “ [I]1732-i ’m in love with [you]0-i , [Emily Foster]91-emily . ”[1732-i] [He]1732-i leans in and kisses [me]0-i slowly . [His]1732-i tongue swipes through [my]0-i open lips with such emotion that [I]0-i get a lump in [my]0-i throat . “ [I]1732-i ca n’t help it . [I]1732-i tried to stop it , and [I]1732-i could n’t . [I]1732-i think [I]1732-i ’ve loved [you]0-i since [our]4085-our first night together in [Boston]11-boston . [You]0-i stayed with [me]1732-i . [I]1732-i fought it , and still , [I]1732-i could n’t forget [you]0-i . [I]1732-i ’ve been carrying [your]0-i scarf around like [a lovesick fool]4086-a lovesick fool for more than a year . ”[1732-i] [I]0-i stare at [him]1734-me . “ So please forgive [me]0-i if [I]0-i want to go full steam ahead . This is not a snap decision . It ’s been coming for a long time , and now that [I]0-i ’m in a position to act on it , [I]0-i do n’t want to waste any more time . [I]0-i want [you]0-i with [me]0-i . By [my]0-i side . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stare at [him]1734-me while [my]0-i brain catches up . What the . . . ? Holy shit . [He]1734-me picks up [his]1734-me knife and fork . “ Now [I]1734-me ’m going to eat [his]1734-me beautiful dinner that [you]0-i ’ve made for [me]1734-me , and then [I]1734-me ’m going to take [you]0-i to bed and make [you]0-i forget everything that [I]1734-me said to [you]0-i about not falling for [me]1734-me , and then , hopefully , [you]0-i can show [me]1734-me that [you]0-i have some kind of resemblance of feelings for [me]1734-me too . ”[1734-me] [I]0-i smile as [my]0-i heart swells . “ Okay ? ”[1734-me] [he]1734-me asks before [he]1734-me takes a mouthful of food . “ Okay . ”[1734-me] [I]0-i sip [my]0-i wine with a shaky hand . [I]0-i look down at [my]0-i dinner and smirk . Mushroom sauce . . . [my]0-i new love potion . Abracadabra . [Jameson Miles]126-jameson just blew [my]0-i fucking mind . [I]0-i roll over and put [my]0-i hand out , and [I]0-i frown . [Jameson]126-jameson is n’t in bed beside [me]0-i . [I]0-i glance over at the clock : 3:33 a.m. Where is [he]126-jameson ? [I]0-i get out of bed and walk down [the hall]729-the hall in search of [[my]0-i man]3820-my man . The kitchen light is on . Hmm , but no [Jay]158-jay . [I]0-i walk down to [the other end of [the apartment]3531-the apartment]1737-the other end of the apartment and see the light coming from [[his]126-jameson office]496-his office , and [I]0-i tiptoe up [the hall]729-the hall . [Jameson]126-jameson is sitting at [his]126-jameson desk ; [his]126-jameson thumbnail rubs back and forth over [his]126-jameson bottom lip as [he]126-jameson stares at the computer screen as it lights up [the room]613-the room . [I]0-i stand silently at the door as [I]0-i watch [him]126-jameson . [He]126-jameson ’s frowning , deep in concentration . What ’s waking [him]126-jameson up in the middle of the night ? What ’s [he]126-jameson worried about ? For five minutes , [I]0-i watch [him]126-jameson in silence . [I]0-i can feel the worry oozing out of [him]126-jameson . Finally , [I]0-i can take it no more . “ Hey , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [He]126-jameson glances up , startled . “ Hello , [sweetheart]3764-sweetheart . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles softly . [I]0-i walk over and look over [his]126-jameson shoulder at the screen . It displays a graph with a red line that gradually declines . Stock Value : Miles Media . Shit . [I]0-i climb onto [his]126-jameson lap and kiss [his]126-jameson lips softly . “ [You]0-i ca n’t sleep ? ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson runs [his]126-jameson hand down [my]0-i naked back . “ [I]126-jameson ’m fine . ”[126-jameson] But [he]126-jameson ’s not fine — [his]126-jameson company ’s value is plummeting . How many millions did [[his]126-jameson family]1742-his family lose today ? “ Any news ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i stare at the graph in front of [me]0-i . “ On ? ”[0-i] “ The case ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson shakes [his]126-jameson head . [His]126-jameson jaw ticks in anger as [his]126-jameson eyes go back to the graph . [He]126-jameson ’s like a raging ball of anxiety ; [I]0-i can almost feel [his]126-jameson pain . [I]0-i need to make [him]126-jameson forget this for the moment . [I]0-i kiss [his]126-jameson neck , and [he]126-jameson smiles as [I]0-i softly nip down to [his]126-jameson collarbone . [I]0-i drop to the floor between [his]126-jameson legs , and [he]126-jameson looks down at [me]0-i as [he]126-jameson runs [his]126-jameson hand through [my]0-i hair . Emotion runs between [us]1743-us , electricity [I]0-i ca n’t explain . “ [I]0-i missed [you]126-jameson when [you]126-jameson were away , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i slowly slide [his]126-jameson boxers off . [He]126-jameson smiles softly as [I]0-i kiss [his]126-jameson dick . It flexes in approval . “ [I]0-i missed [[my]0-i man]3820-my man , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i take [him]126-jameson in [my]0-i mouth . “ [My]0-i body missed [you]126-jameson . ”[0-i] [I]0-i need to make [him]126-jameson forget where [he]126-jameson is , who [he]126-jameson is . This stress has to leave . Now [I]0-i want to be [that spontaneous woman [he]126-jameson met twelve months ago]1744-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago , [the one who blew [his]126-jameson mind]1745-the one who blew his mind . [He]126-jameson inhales sharply and spreads [his]126-jameson legs , granting [me]0-i access . [Our]1746-our eyes are locked as [I]0-i suck on the most private part of [his]126-jameson body , the one that [nobody]3121-nobody gets to see . [He]126-jameson ’s thick and hard , and [I]0-i can see every vein on [his]126-jameson engorged length . [I]0-i lick up [his]126-jameson length and then flick [my]0-i tongue over [his]126-jameson end , and [I]0-i can almost hear the arousal as it runs through [his]126-jameson body like a river rapid . “ Fuck [my]0-i mouth , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i watch [him]126-jameson . [His]126-jameson eyes darken . “ Take [my]0-i hair in [your]126-jameson hands , and fuck [my]0-i mouth , ”[0-i] [I]0-i murmur around [him]126-jameson . [His]126-jameson eyes dance with fire , and [he]126-jameson grabs [my]0-i hair in both hands and surges forward . [I]0-i ’m blessed with a burst of preejaculate , and [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes and moan . [He]126-jameson begins to slide [his]126-jameson cock deep down [my]0-i throat , and [I]0-i hum around [him]126-jameson . What must [I]0-i look like , on [my]0-i hands and knees , naked , under [[my]0-i boyfriend]3355-my boyfriend ’s desk ? [My]0-i own arousal takes shape , and [I]0-i spread [my]0-i legs , and [he]126-jameson moans as [he]126-jameson begins to really pump . [I]0-i take [him]126-jameson in [my]0-i hand , and [my]0-i fist follows [my]0-i mouth as [I]0-i begin to work [him]126-jameson hard . [He]126-jameson needs it hard . [I]0-i can see every muscle contract in [his]126-jameson stomach as [he]126-jameson clenches , and [I]0-i push [his]126-jameson legs open farther and take [his]126-jameson balls in [my]0-i hand . “ Fuck , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson moans . “ Come , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [Blow]191-blow . [I]0-i want to drink [you]126-jameson down . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson eyes roll back in [his]126-jameson head , and [he]126-jameson really lets [me]0-i have it . [I]0-i smile around [him]126-jameson . [I]0-i love it when [I]0-i bring [him]126-jameson undone like this . It ’s like [I]0-i hover up in the air and watch with a special detachment . [An audience of one]1749-an audience of one — the best porn on [the planet]1218-the planet . [His]126-jameson stomach contracts , and [I]0-i smile as [he]126-jameson shoots down [my]0-i throat . [I]0-i concentrate on not gagging . It ’s hard with a cock this big , but when [he]126-jameson opens [his]126-jameson eyes , they ’re blazing . . . and all [my]0-i fears are laid to rest . This is what [I]0-i love . [I]0-i love loving [Jameson]126-jameson with the unbridled passion that [he]126-jameson brings out in [me]0-i . [I]0-i ’ve never been [this woman]943-this woman before , but with [him]126-jameson . . . it ’s natural . As if [he]126-jameson was the missing link in [my]0-i sexuality . [We]1752-our ’ve already had sex once earlier tonight , and that time was intimate and loving . Nothing like this , but just as important . [I]0-i keep working [him]126-jameson , emptying [his]126-jameson beautiful body until [he]126-jameson drags [me]0-i up to [him]126-jameson and spreads [me]0-i over [his]126-jameson lap . [His]126-jameson lips take [mine]0-i , and [he]126-jameson moans as [he]126-jameson tastes [himself]126-jameson in [my]0-i mouth . [I]0-i pull back to look at [him]126-jameson , the air between [us]1752-our electric , and [our]1752-our eyes lock . “ [I]0-i love [you]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [He]126-jameson smiles , and then [his]126-jameson lips crash to [mine]0-i . [Our]1752-our kiss is desperate , and [he]126-jameson stands and carries [me]0-i down [the hall]729-the hall back to bed as [I]0-i cling to [him]126-jameson . [Our]1752-our attachment is deep . So deep . For the first time in [my]0-i life , [I]0-i feel like [I]0-i ’m [home]3076-home . [I]0-i sit and watch [Hayden]113-hayden walk across [the street]654-the street toward [the café [we]1752-our are in]1756-the café we are in . [He]113-hayden ’s carrying a briefcase . Why would [he]113-hayden need [his]113-hayden briefcase on [his]113-hayden lunch break ? [This guy]289-this guy is suspicious as all hell . “ How long have [you]1758-her known [Hayden]113-hayden , [Moll]111-molly ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask [her]1758-her . [Aaron]110-aaron sips [his]110-aaron drink through [his]110-aaron straw as [he]110-aaron listens and watches [Hayden]113-hayden . [The three of [us]1752-our]629-the three of us are at [[our]1752-our favorite lunch spot]1760-our favorite lunch spot and sitting at the bench by the window . [She]1758-her gives [me]0-i a lopsided twist of [her]1758-her lips . “ About eight years , [I]1758-her think . ”[1758-her] “ [Aaron]110-aaron said that [you]0-i used to work with [him]113-hayden at [[your]0-i old job]4089-your old job . ”[1758-her] “ Yeah . ”[1758-her] [She]1758-her chews [her]1758-her toasted sandwich as [she]1758-her watches [him]113-hayden . “ [He]113-hayden worked at [the Gazette]3444-the gazette with [me]1758-her . ”[1758-her] [My]0-i attention goes back to watching [him]113-hayden . “ [You]1758-her know , [I]1758-her think [he]113-hayden ’s up to something . ”[1758-her] “ Would n’t surprise [me]1758-her . ”[1758-her] [She]1758-her wipes [her]1758-her mouth with [her]1758-her napkin . “ Why do [you]1758-her say that ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [He]113-hayden was fired from [the Gazette]3444-the gazette . ”[0-i] “ What for ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron frowns . “ [I]110-aaron do n’t know for certain , but the word on [the street]654-the street was that [he]113-hayden was involved in a phone - tap scandal . ”[110-aaron] “ What ? ”[0-i] “ Apparently . ”[1758-her] [She]1758-her rolls [her]1758-her eyes . “ And this is complete speculation , but [he]113-hayden was caught tapping one of [[his]113-hayden coworkers]4093-his coworkers ’ phones and stealing [her]1758-her leads . ”[1758-her] [My]0-i eyes widen . “ Really ? [Who]4094-who ? ”[1758-her] “ [A girl named [Keeley May]111-molly]4095-a girl named keeley may . ”[1758-her] “ Oh yes , [the redhead]1126-the redhead , ”[110-aaron] remarks [Aaron]110-aaron . “ [She]1126-the redhead ’s fucking hot . ”[110-aaron] [Molly]111-molly ’s and [my]0-i eyes go to [him]110-aaron . “ Since when do [you]110-aaron think [girls]3583-girls are hot ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly asks . “ [I]110-aaron ’m gay , not blind . [I]110-aaron can appreciate [a fine female form]4098-a fine female form , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron huffs . [We]1761-we both roll [our]1761-we eyes . “ Why do [you]110-aaron think [he]110-aaron ’s up to something ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly asks . God , can [I]0-i tell [them]1762-them ? No . . . [I]0-i have to run it past [Tristan]135-tristan first . [I]0-i ca n’t break [their]1762-them trust in [me]0-i . “ [I]0-i told [him]110-aaron one of [my]0-i stories the other day , and [I]0-i saw that [he]110-aaron submitted it as [his]110-aaron own , ”[0-i] [I]0-i lie . [Molly]111-molly narrows [her]111-molly eyes . “ [Fucking snake]4099-fucking snake . ”[111-molly] “ [I]0-i have no proof , of course , ”[0-i] [I]0-i add . “ [I]0-i was just wondering about [his]110-aaron character , that ’s all . ”[0-i] “ From what [I]111-molly know of [him]110-aaron , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly says dryly , “ [I]111-molly would n’t trust [him]110-aaron as far as [I]111-molly could throw [him]110-aaron . ”[111-molly] “ Like [Paul]131-paul , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron sneers . “ Oh [God]88-god , what happened now ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Nothing . ”[0-i] [He]110-aaron sighs . “ [He]110-aaron ’s just [an asshole]785-an asshole , that ’s all . ”[110-aaron] [Molly]111-molly rolls [her]111-molly eyes in disgust . “ [You]0-i know what , [Aaron]110-aaron , stop playing [the fucking victim]4101-the fucking victim here . [You]0-i know [he]110-aaron ’s sleeping around , and [you]0-i ’re still sleeping with [him]110-aaron . It ’s one thing to be deceived , but to willingly go back for more when [you]0-i know exactly what is going on is just plain pathetic . ”[111-molly] [He]110-aaron rolls [his]110-aaron eyes . “ [You]0-i do n’t have to be such a bitch about it . ”[110-aaron] “ Yeah , [I]1763-i do . [You]0-i ’re acting like [a damsel in distress]4102-a damsel in distress . [You]0-i do n’t have [kids]3421-kids with [him]110-aaron . [You]0-i do n’t have a mortgage . [You]0-i do n’t work with [him]110-aaron . The break would be easy . Tell [him]110-aaron to fuck off and move on , ”[1763-i] [she]1763-i scoffs . “ Breakups are hard . Staying with [an asshole]785-an asshole is harder . ”[1763-i] “ Speaking of moving on — [Jameson]126-jameson asked [me]0-i to move in with [him]110-aaron , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say to change the subject . [Aaron]110-aaron snorts [his]110-aaron drink , and it goes up [his]110-aaron nose . “ What the hell ? ”[110-aaron] “ Apparently . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug . [Aaron]110-aaron frowns . “ What ’s with the turnabout ? ”[110-aaron] “ [He]110-aaron went and saw [Claudia]122-claudia , [[his]110-aaron ex]1731-his ex , while [he]110-aaron was in [London]8-london . ”[110-aaron] “ Did [he]110-aaron fuck [her]122-claudia ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron asks as [he]110-aaron chews [his]110-aaron straw . “ No , [Aaron]110-aaron , fucking [other people]3082-other people is n’t normal behavior , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly snaps . “ Get that through [your]110-aaron thick head . [Your]110-aaron view on reality is seriously distorted . ”[111-molly] “ Fuck , [you]111-molly ’re [a real bitch]4107-a real bitch today , [you]111-molly know that ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron snaps . “ Well , [that communal dick of [[your]110-aaron boyfriend]3289-your boyfriend ’s]4108-that communal dick of your boyfriend ’s is pissing [me]111-molly off , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly scoffs . [Aaron]110-aaron and [I]0-i roll [our]1764-our eyes . [Molly]111-molly is especially testy today . “ [He]110-aaron said that [he]110-aaron and [Claudia]122-claudia had planned on getting back together , but [he]110-aaron told [her]122-claudia [he]110-aaron wanted a future with [me]111-molly . [He]110-aaron ended it . ”[111-molly] “ Holy shit , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron whispers . “ [He]110-aaron told [me]110-aaron [he]110-aaron loves [me]110-aaron . ”[110-aaron] “ What the fuck ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly cries . “ Are [you]110-aaron serious ? ”[111-molly] “ But . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug . “ But what ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron whispers . “ There should be no buts anywhere in this story . ”[110-aaron] “ It ’s all so fast . What ’s the rush , [you]110-aaron know ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug . “ [I]0-i ’m scared [he]110-aaron ’s just stressed . ”[0-i] [They]1765-they both continue to listen . “ [He]110-aaron told [me]1765-they that [he]110-aaron ’s had feelings since [we]4110-we first met , and it ’s been coming for a long time . ”[1765-they] “ That could be true . ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly frowns . “ It could be . ”[111-molly] [I]0-i sip [my]0-i coffee . “ It could also be in [his]110-aaron takeover strategy . ”[0-i] “ What takeover strategy ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly frowns . “ [Jameson Miles]126-jameson gets what [he]110-aaron wants , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply . “ If [he]110-aaron ’s decided [he]110-aaron wants [me]0-i — ”[0-i] “ Which [he]110-aaron has , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron interrupts . “ [He]110-aaron will make it happen . [I]0-i do n’t know . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug . “ It just all seems too good to be true , and the whole [Claudia]122-claudia situation has freaked [me]0-i out a little . Can [I]0-i really believe that [Claudia]122-claudia and [he]110-aaron will just break off all communication now ? ”[0-i] [Molly]111-molly rolls [her]111-molly eyes . “ Here [we]4111-we go . Have [[you]4111-we two idiots]4112-you two idiots been sniffing ink cartridges today ? ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly screws up [her]111-molly napkin with force . “ Stop being [a fucking negative bitch]4113-a fucking negative bitch . If [he]110-aaron did n’t tell [you]0-i [he]110-aaron loved [you]0-i , that would have been a problem . Now that [he]110-aaron has , [he]110-aaron has an ulterior motive . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly throws [her]111-molly hands up in disgust . “ Will [you]4111-we two come back to [Earth]40-earth ? ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly gets up . “ [We]4111-we have to get back . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly storms out , and [Aaron]110-aaron and [I]0-i watch [her]111-molly cross [the street]654-the street . “ [She]111-molly needs a good deep dicking , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron mutters . “ [She]111-molly ’s in full bitch mode . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i giggle as [I]0-i watch [her]111-molly walk into [the building]412-the building . “ [You]0-i could be right . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i stare at [my]0-i reflection in the mirror and exhale heavily . [I]0-i turn and check [my]0-i behind . [I]0-i ’m wearing a gold Chanel dress that [Jameson]126-jameson picked off the rack yesterday . [My]0-i long dark hair is set into large curls and pinned behind one ear , and [my]0-i makeup is glamorous with glossy red lips . [I]0-i ’m nervous as all hell . This is the first time [I]0-i ’ve ever been anywhere formal with [him]126-jameson as [[his]126-jameson date]1768-his date . . . and of course , [[his]126-jameson whole family]1769-his whole family is going to be there to witness it . Could be a complete disaster . Just do n’t spill anything on [your]1770-your dress or drink too much champagne and be embarrassing , [I]0-i remind [myself]0-i . God , [I]0-i could n’t cope . The worst thing is , because [I]0-i ’m so nervous , [I]0-i want to power drink . “ Are [you]0-i nearly ready , [my]126-jameson fuck bunny ? ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson calls . [He]126-jameson appears around the door and gives [me]0-i a slow , sexy smile as [his]126-jameson eyes drop down the length of [my]0-i body . “ Jesus , [you]0-i look beautiful . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i brush [my]0-i hands nervously over [my]0-i thighs . “ Is this okay ? ”[0-i] “ Perfect . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson takes [me]0-i in [his]126-jameson arms and kisses [my]0-i cheek . “ [I]126-jameson do n’t like those red lips , though . ”[126-jameson] “ Oh . ”[0-i] [My]0-i face falls . “ [I]0-i ca n’t kiss [you]126-jameson without wearing the evidence . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile as [he]126-jameson holds [me]0-i . Something has changed between [us]1771-us again today . Another day , another dynamic . [I]0-i feel so close to [him]126-jameson . Something about all that honesty yesterday tore down [my]0-i defenses against [him]126-jameson . [Molly]111-molly is completely right , and [I]0-i am looking for the negative in this , but [I]0-i ca n’t help it ; [I]0-i fear [my]0-i heart may be in dire danger . If [he]126-jameson leaves [me]0-i . . . how would [I]0-i cope ? [I]0-i ’ve been hurt before , and although [I]0-i know that [Jameson]126-jameson is in a completely different league than [my]0-i past relationships , the prospect is terrifying . [This one]3959-this one will hurt . . . deeply . [He]126-jameson ’s wearing a black tuxedo and a bow tie ; [his]126-jameson eyes are a brilliant blue , and [his]126-jameson dark hair frames [his]126-jameson beautiful face . [I]0-i ’ve never had [a man]3093-a man terrify [me]0-i the way that [Jameson Miles]126-jameson does . [He]126-jameson ’s everything [I]0-i never knew [I]0-i needed . [He]126-jameson takes [my]0-i hand in [his]126-jameson . “ Do [you]0-i have everything ? ”[126-jameson] “ Uh - huh . ”[0-i] [I]0-i put [my]0-i hand over [my]0-i heart to try to will it to slow down . “ What ’s wrong ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says softly . “ [I]126-jameson ’m nervous . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles sexily . “ [You]0-i ’ll be fine . ”[126-jameson] “ Do n’t let [me]126-jameson drink too much , okay ? ”[126-jameson] “ Okay . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smirks as [we]1774-we walk to the door . “ And if [you]0-i see [me]126-jameson drinking too much , take [my]126-jameson glass from [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson frowns . “ Honestly , [Jay]158-jay , [I]126-jameson go from a level four to a ten in two mouthfuls . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smirks and then , thinking on that statement further , throws [his]126-jameson head back and laughs out loud . “ Not a truer word has ever been spoken . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i drop [my]0-i mouth open in fake horror . “ [I]126-jameson ’m not talking about head , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson am . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson kisses [my]0-i hand . “ And for the record , [you]0-i went from a ten to a twenty . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smirk , and [he]126-jameson bends and kisses [my]0-i neck and then [my]0-i shoulder and then [my]0-i breast through [my]0-i dress . “ The sooner [we]4114-we go , the sooner [we]4114-we can leave . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson runs [his]126-jameson hand down [my]0-i behind and gives [me]0-i a sharp slap . Half an hour later , [the limo]811-the limo pulls into [the parking bay]760-the parking bay , and [I]0-i look around at all [the beautiful people in black tie]1777-the beautiful people in black tie . As [my]0-i nerves begin to kick [me]0-i hard , [Jameson]126-jameson picks up [my]0-i hand and kisses the back of it , oblivious to [my]0-i inner turmoil . What will [I]0-i say to [[his]126-jameson mother]1778-his mother ? [[His]126-jameson father]3590-his father ? Oh hell . . . why did [I]0-i come ? [Alan]152-alan opens the door , and [Jameson]126-jameson climbs out and then takes [my]0-i hand and helps [me]0-i . [His]126-jameson hand tenderly goes to [my]0-i lower back . “ Thank [you]152-alan , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says to [Alan]152-alan . “ Thank [you]152-alan . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smile . [Jameson]126-jameson takes [my]0-i hand , and [we]1780-we walk up toward the large front doors . [A few people]1781-a few people do a double take as [they]1781-a few people see [us]1780-we , and [people]267-people are staring . [I]0-i hold [my]0-i breath as [he]126-jameson leads [me]0-i through [the crowd]287-the crowd . “ Hello , [Jameson]126-jameson , ”[401-someone] [someone]401-someone says . [He]126-jameson nods politely but does n’t stop to chat . [We]1780-we walk in through the double doors , and [he]126-jameson leads [me]0-i straight to a table up at the front . [It]1785-it ’s round with a white linen tablecloth and silver cutlery all lined up , and beautiful white flowers and candles sit in the center . Crap , what ’s the eating order of the cutlery ? [I]0-i need to go to [the bathroom]328-the bathroom and google this shit . [[Jameson]126-jameson ’s father]1787-jameson ’s father is sitting at the table along with [an older woman]1788-an older woman . [She]1788-an older woman has dark hair that sits in a perfect bob . [She]1788-an older woman ’s very attractive and wearing a glamorous black evening dress with long sleeves . “ [Mom]105-mom , [Dad]192-dad , this is [Emily]91-emily . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson presents [me]0-i proudly . “ These are [[my]126-jameson parents]1276-my parents , [Elizabeth]193-elizabeth and [George]121-george . ”[126-jameson] “ Hello , [dear]3154-dear . ”[1778-his mother] [[His]126-jameson mother]1778-his mother stands and kisses both [my]0-i cheeks and holds [me]0-i at arm ’s length as [she]1778-his mother inspects [me]0-i . “ Well , are n’t [you]0-i something special . ”[1778-his mother] [She]1778-his mother smiles warmly . Oh , [she]1778-his mother ’s nice . [I]0-i smile awkwardly , and [[his]126-jameson father]3590-his father pulls [me]0-i from [[his]126-jameson mother]1778-his mother and kisses [my]0-i cheek . “ Hello , [Emily]91-emily . [I]3590-his father did n’t get a chance to talk with [you]91-emily properly the other day . Lovely to meet [you]91-emily . ”[3590-his father] “ Yes , [you]3590-his father too , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [Jameson]126-jameson pulls out [my]0-i chair , and [I]0-i sit down as [my]0-i heart races in [my]0-i chest . [I]0-i can feel [my]0-i face flushing , and [I]0-i silently die a little . Do n’t go red now , stupid . [I]0-i get an image of a beetroot face sitting next to [Mr. Gorgeous]194-mr. gorgeous here . [Jameson]126-jameson pours [me]0-i a glass of champagne and passes it over . “ Thank [you]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i take it from [him]126-jameson . [My]0-i eyes hold [his]126-jameson in a silent “ help [me]0-i ”[0-i] signal . [He]126-jameson gives [me]0-i a sexy wink and slings [his]126-jameson arm around the back of [my]0-i chair . “ Where ’s [Tris]135-tristan ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks casually as [he]126-jameson looks around [the room]613-the room . “ On [his]135-tristan way , ”[126-jameson] [[his]126-jameson father]3590-his father replies . [I]0-i look around at [all the people filling [the ballroom]1795-the ballroom]1794-all the people filling the ballroom . [The who ’s who are [here]275-here]1796-the who ’s who are here — not that [I]0-i remember any of [their]1796-the who ’s who are here names . [I]0-i ’m only going on what [Molly]111-molly and [Aaron]110-aaron prepped [me]0-i with today . [Two of [the managers [I]0-i ’ve seen [upstairs]3211-upstairs on [the top floor]467-the top floor]1799-the managers i ’ve seen upstairs on the top floor]1798-two of the managers i ’ve seen upstairs on the top floor arrive with [their]1798-two of the managers i ’ve seen upstairs on the top floor dates . “ Hello . ”[1798-two of the managers i ’ve seen upstairs on the top floor] [They]1798-two of the managers i ’ve seen upstairs on the top floor all shake hands , and then [the men]434-the men frown when [they]434-the men see [me]0-i . “ Have [you]434-the men met [Emily]91-emily , [[my]126-jameson girlfriend]4117-my girlfriend ? ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson asks [them]434-the men . “ Oh yes . ”[434-the men] [They]434-the men smile in an over - the - top way . “ Hello , [Emily]91-emily , ”[434-the men] the four of [them]434-the men splutter before shaking [my]0-i hand and sitting down at [our]1803-our table . [Jameson]126-jameson sits next to [me]0-i , and [[his]126-jameson father]3590-his father is on the other side of [him]126-jameson , then [[his]126-jameson mother]1778-his mother , then [the other four]1806-the other four . Two seats are to [my]0-i left — must be for [Tristan]135-tristan . “ Hello , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan says happily from behind [me]0-i . [I]0-i turn and see that [the blonde woman]1807-the blonde woman is with [him]135-tristan . “ Hello , ”[3098-everyone] [everyone]3098-everyone calls . “ [Emily]91-emily , this is [Melina]195-melina , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan introduces [me]0-i . “ Hello . ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i shake [her]1807-the blonde woman hand . “ Hello . ”[0-i] [She]1807-the blonde woman smiles as [she]1807-the blonde woman takes a seat beside [me]0-i and looks around the table . “ [I]1807-the blonde woman just could n’t decide what to wear tonight . How is [everyone]3098-everyone ? ”[1807-the blonde woman] The table instantly falls into chatter . [She]1807-the blonde woman ’s confident and beautiful , and [she]1807-the blonde woman looks like [a high - fashion model]1809-a high - fashion model rather than a . . . what does [she]1807-the blonde woman do again ? [I]0-i glance over to see [Jameson]126-jameson and [[his]126-jameson father]3590-his father subtly roll [their]1811-their eyes at [each other]351-each other . Hmm , what ’s that about ? [Tristan]135-tristan begins to talk to [a man at the table next to [us]1814-us]1813-a man at the table next to us and laughs out loud . [He]135-tristan really is very friendly . [Melina]195-melina takes out [her]195-melina phone and pulls a duck mouth and takes a selfie . [She]195-melina leans toward [me]0-i . “ Get in , ”[195-melina] [she]195-melina says . “ [I]195-melina ’ll tag [you]0-i . ”[195-melina] [I]0-i pull out of [her]195-melina grip and lean away . “ No thank [you]195-melina . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ [I]0-i do n’t do social media . ”[0-i] “ What ? ”[195-melina] [she]195-melina gasps as [she]195-melina looks [me]0-i up and down in disgust . “ Why on earth not ? What ’s wrong with [you]0-i ? ”[195-melina] Okay . . . [this woman]943-this woman ’s [a rude pig]3235-a rude pig . “ [I]0-i do n’t like social media , that ’s all . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug . “ What ’s not to like ? ”[0-i] [She]195-melina keeps taking [her]195-melina own photo . [I]0-i stare at [her]195-melina deadpan . “ A misrepresentation of society with unrealistic images that portray a fake lifestyle with impossible ideals , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply as [I]0-i sip [my]0-i wine . Do n’t piss [me]0-i off , [bitch]1817-bitch . [Jameson]126-jameson smirks as [he]126-jameson stares straight ahead . [His]126-jameson finger circles on [my]0-i bare shoulder . “ Oh God . ”[126-jameson] [She]195-melina rolls [her]195-melina eyes and takes another selfie . [I]0-i glance over , and [[Jameson]126-jameson ’s mother]1818-jameson ’s mother smirks and winks at [me]0-i . [I]0-i can hear [my]0-i heartbeat in [my]0-i ears . God , cut out the snarky bitch act , [Emily]91-emily , [I]0-i remind [myself]0-i . Just be nice for once . [Jameson]126-jameson and [[his]126-jameson father]3590-his father fall into conversation , and [I]0-i sit quietly . [The waiter]867-the waiter comes over and goes to refill [my]0-i glass . “ No thank [you]867-the waiter . ”[867-the waiter] [I]0-i smile . [Melina]195-melina talks to [the other people at the table]1821-the other people at the table ; [she]195-melina ’s laughing loudly and loves attention . [She]195-melina ’s not at all the type of woman [I]0-i thought [Tristan]135-tristan would go for . “ [Emily]91-emily , [you]91-emily must come and visit [us]4119-we in [the Hamptons]41-the hamptons , ”[126-jameson] [[Jameson]126-jameson ’s mother]1818-jameson ’s mother says . “ Thank [you]867-the waiter . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smile . “ That would be lovely . ”[0-i] [I]0-i should try to make conversation . “ Do [you]1818-jameson ’s mother go on weekends ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [We]4119-we live [there]3073-there mostly now , ”[1818-jameson ’s mother] [she]1818-jameson ’s mother says . “ [We]4119-we still have [[our]4119-we apartments]4121-our apartments [here]275-here , of course , but the change of pace is lovely . ”[1818-jameson ’s mother] “ Oh . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . How many [apartments]1823-apartments do [they]1824-they have [here]275-here ? Jeez , [they]1824-they really are from [a different world]1826-a different world . “ Sounds great . ”[1824-they] “ [Jameson]126-jameson said [you]0-i are from [California]15-california ? ”[1818-jameson ’s mother] [she]1818-jameson ’s mother asks . “ Yes . ”[1818-jameson ’s mother] [I]0-i fake a smile . [He]1827-he told [them]1824-they about [me]0-i ? “ [I]1827-he ’ve only been [here]275-here a month . ”[1827-he] “ And what do [you]0-i think of [New York]3-new york ? ”[1818-jameson ’s mother] “ [I]0-i love it . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ It ’s amazing . ”[0-i] [Jameson]126-jameson ’s hand sits on [my]0-i shoulder for moral support while [he]126-jameson talks to [[his]126-jameson father]3590-his father . “ [Jameson]126-jameson told [us]1830-we that [you]0-i met [each other]351-each other more than twelve months ago , ”[193-elizabeth] [Elizabeth]193-elizabeth continues . “ Yes . ”[193-elizabeth] [I]0-i fake a smile . Oh dear [God]88-god . What did [he]126-jameson tell [them]1829-them about how [we]1830-we met ? Please do n’t let it be the truth , that [we]1830-we sat next to [each other]351-each other on [a boozy flight]1832-a boozy flight and flirted like [sex - starved fools]1833-sex - starved fools and then had wild layover sex for twelve hours while [I]0-i tried to suck every last drop of blood from [his]126-jameson neck . [I]0-i pick up [my]0-i wine and tip [my]0-i head back and kick [Jameson]126-jameson ’s foot . Help [me]0-i , [fucker]3645-fucker . [He]126-jameson smiles as if [he]126-jameson already knows what ’s going on in [my]0-i head . [Tristan]135-tristan finally takes a seat , and [Melina]195-melina leans over and kisses [him]135-tristan . “ Let ’s go mingle . ”[195-melina] [He]135-tristan frowns as [he]135-tristan takes [his]135-tristan first sip of scotch . “ No , [babe]3279-babe . [I]135-tristan ’m staying [here]275-here . Knock [yourself]3279-babe out . ”[135-tristan] [Melina]195-melina waves at [a woman on the other side of the room]1835-a woman on the other side of the room and stands . “ Back in a moment . ”[195-melina] [She]195-melina smiles to the table as [she]195-melina practically runs to [the woman]1836-the woman and air kisses [her]1836-the woman two cheeks . “ [Darling]3152-darling , ”[195-melina] [she]195-melina cries , and [they]1837-they fake gush over [each other]351-each other . [My]0-i eyes find [Jameson]126-jameson ’s , and [he]126-jameson rolls [his]126-jameson lips in amusement . It ’s as if [he]126-jameson can read [my]0-i mind . [She]195-melina ’s a twit . [Jameson]126-jameson ’s jaw tilts skyward , and [his]126-jameson tongue runs across [his]126-jameson teeth as if [he]126-jameson ’s angered . [I]0-i follow [his]126-jameson line of sight and see [a group of [men]426-men and [women]300-women arriving at a table across from [us]1842-us]1839-a group of men and women arriving at a table across from us . [My]0-i eyes flick to [[his]126-jameson father]3590-his father and [mother]1844-mother as [they]1839-a group of men and women arriving at a table across from us look on as well . “ Who are [they]1839-a group of men and women arriving at a table across from us ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [The Ferrara family]4128-the ferrara family . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown in question . “ [They]1839-a group of men and women arriving at a table across from us own the Gazette and [Ferrara Media]42-ferrara media . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes widen . “ Oh . ”[0-i] [I]0-i go back to watching [them]1839-a group of men and women arriving at a table across from us as [they]1839-a group of men and women arriving at a table across from us all sit around the table . [Three sons]1845-three sons and [a mother]1846-a mother and [father]1847-father , [Italian by the looks of it]1848-italian by the looks of it . [Gorgeous - looking people]1849-gorgeous - looking people . . . [all dark hair and brown eyes]1850-all dark hair and brown eyes . [Only one son]1851-only one son has a date ; [the other two]1852-the other two are alone . [The eldest son]1853-the eldest son looks over and smiles when [he]1853-the eldest son sees [us]1854-us . [He]1853-the eldest son waves and dips [his]1853-the eldest son head . [Jameson]126-jameson dips [his]126-jameson head back in a polite but cold gesture . “ Who ’s that ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [Gabriel Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson replies as [he]126-jameson sips [his]126-jameson drink . Contempt drips from [his]126-jameson every pore . “ [The CEO]3206-the ceo . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes widen . [I]0-i can tell that there is no love lost between [the two families]1855-the two families . [CEO]1856-ceo versus [CEO]1856-ceo . “ [Emily]91-emily ? ”[381-a woman] [a woman]381-a woman ’s voice gasps from behind [us]1854-us . [We]1854-us all turn to see [a woman]381-a woman . [I]0-i know [her]381-a woman . “ [Athena]197-athena . ”[381-a woman] [I]0-i laugh as [I]0-i stand . [Athena]197-athena is in [her]197-athena sixties and [a woman of [the world]268-the world]1860-a woman of the world . [I]0-i adore [her]197-athena . “ Oh [my]197-athena God , ”[197-athena] [she]197-athena gasps as [she]197-athena pulls [me]0-i into an embrace . “ [Jameson Miles]126-jameson , how on earth do [you]126-jameson know [Emily Foster]91-emily ? ”[1862-he] [He]1862-he chuckles . “ [Emily]91-emily has been [[my]1862-he intern]4130-my intern every college holiday for three years . ”[1862-he] [Athena]197-athena laughs . [George]121-george looks on as if impressed . “ [She]91-emily would n’t move here for [[my]121-george company]4131-my company . ”[121-george] [She]197-athena smiles as [she]197-athena rubs [my]0-i arm . “ What do [you]126-jameson mean ? ”[121-george] [George]121-george asks . “ [Best damn reporter [I]197-athena ever had]4132-best damn reporter i ever had , ”[197-athena] [Athena]197-athena replies . “ [I]197-athena ’ve offered [her]91-emily a job every year , but [she]91-emily always turned [me]197-athena down , stating that [Miles Media]12-miles media would be the only reason [she]91-emily would move to [New York]3-new york . ”[197-athena] [I]0-i smile awkwardly . Please shut up . [I]0-i ’m trying to play it cool here . “ Is that so ? ”[121-george] [George]121-george smiles over at [me]0-i . “ Well , [she]91-emily ’s found [[her]91-emily place at [Miles Media]12-miles media]4133-her place at miles media . ”[121-george] [Athena]197-athena looks down at [Jameson]126-jameson ’s hand as it rests on [my]0-i lap . “ [I]197-athena can see that . ”[197-athena] [She]197-athena smiles down at [me]0-i . “ [Emily]91-emily , come , [I]197-athena have someone [I]197-athena want [you]91-emily to meet . ”[197-athena] [She]197-athena glances at [Jameson]126-jameson . “ Can [I]197-athena steal [her]197-athena for a moment , please ? ”[197-athena] “ Of course . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson kisses [my]0-i hand before [he]126-jameson lets [me]0-i go . [His]126-jameson eyes linger on [my]0-i face , and [I]0-i smile softly . [This man]327-this man is just so . . . [Athena]197-athena pulls [me]0-i over to the other side of [the room]613-the room . “ Oh [my]197-athena God , ”[197-athena] [she]197-athena splutters as [we]1865-we weave between the tables . “ [You]0-i ’re dating [Jameson Miles]126-jameson . ”[197-athena] “ Yes . ”[0-i] [I]0-i laugh . “ [He]126-jameson ’s [the most delicious man on [the planet]1218-the planet]4134-the most delicious man on the planet . ”[0-i] [She]197-athena turns back and smiles at [me]0-i . “ And the crankiest . ”[197-athena] [I]0-i giggle as [she]197-athena drags [me]0-i to [the bar]534-the bar to [a group of women and men who are all standing around]1867-a group of women and men who are all standing around . “ [Lauren]198-lauren , look who ’s here ! [Emily Foster]91-emily . ”[197-athena] “ Oh [my]198-lauren God . ”[198-lauren] [Lauren]198-lauren laughs as [she]198-lauren hugs [me]0-i . [Lauren]198-lauren and [I]0-i were [interns]1868-interns together in [our]1869-we second year . [Lauren]198-lauren went on to work with [them]1870-them . “ What are [you]0-i doing [here]275-here ? ”[197-athena] [She]197-athena smiles excitedly . “ [I]197-athena ’ve moved to [New York]3-new york now . [I]197-athena work for [Miles Media]12-miles media . ”[197-athena] “ Really ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i laugh . “ Yes . ”[0-i] “ Oh [my]197-athena God , [we]1869-we have to catch up . ”[197-athena] “ Yes . ”[0-i] It would be so nice to have [a friend]3096-a friend here that [I]0-i do n’t work with . “ Make sure [we]1869-we get [each other]351-each other ’s numbers . ”[0-i] [I]0-i glance around , and [everyone]3098-everyone has a drink . “ [I]0-i ’m just going to get another champagne . ”[0-i] [Someone]401-someone grabs [my]0-i elbow from behind , and [I]0-i turn . [I]0-i ’m taken aback . [It]401-someone ’s [the tall Italian man]1874-the tall italian man , [the CEO of the Gazette]1875-the ceo of the gazette . “ Hello . ”[1874-the tall italian man] [He]1874-the tall italian man smiles sexily down at [me]0-i . “ Hi . ”[1874-the tall italian man] “ Who are [you]0-i ? ”[1874-the tall italian man] [he]1874-the tall italian man asks . [I]0-i frown , and [my]0-i eyes flick back to [my]0-i table . [Jameson]126-jameson is talking to [Tristan]135-tristan . “ [Emily]91-emily , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply nervously . [He]1874-the tall italian man picks up [my]0-i hand and kisses the back of it . “ [My]1874-the tall italian man name is [Gabriel Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara . ”[1874-the tall italian man] “ Oh . ”[1874-the tall italian man] “ And [I]0-i like to take over all things owned by [Jameson Miles]126-jameson . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes widen . [His]1874-the tall italian man dark eyes drop to [my]0-i lips . “ [Women]300-women included . ”[1874-the tall italian man] Chapter 18 “ Excuse [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i snatch [my]0-i hand from [his]1874-the tall italian man grip . “ What did [you]0-i say ? ”[0-i] [He]1874-the tall italian man smiles sexily . “ [I]1874-the tall italian man was merely stating that [you]0-i are gorgeous . Do n’t be alarmed . ”[1874-the tall italian man] “ Well , do n’t , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . [He]1874-the tall italian man smiles as [he]1874-the tall italian man sips [his]1874-the tall italian man drink , clearly amused by [my]0-i response . “ Who are [you]0-i ? ”[1874-the tall italian man] “ Someone whose intelligence is insulted by [your]1874-the tall italian man audacity . [Goodbye]199-goodbye , [Mr. Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara . Go away . ”[0-i] [I]0-i turn [my]0-i back to [him]1874-the tall italian man and take [my]0-i place at [the bar]534-the bar . [His]1874-the tall italian man lips come to [my]0-i ear from behind . “ Lovely to meet [you]0-i , [Emily]91-emily . [We]4139-we will meet again . [I]1874-the tall italian man ’ll make sure of it . ”[1874-the tall italian man] [His]1874-the tall italian man breath prickles [my]0-i neck , and traitorous goose bumps scatter up [my]0-i arms . “ Do n’t bother , ”[0-i] [I]0-i sneer , annoyed by [my]0-i physical reaction to [him]1874-the tall italian man . [My]0-i heart is hammering . No wonder [poor Jameson]126-jameson is stressed to [the max]1877-the max . [He]126-jameson ’s dealing with complete and utter snakes here . Good grief , [I]0-i ’m completely rattled . [I]0-i get [my]0-i drink and go back to talking to [Lauren]198-lauren , although [my]0-i mind is anywhere but on [our]1878-our conversation . [That fucking asshole]3793-that fucking asshole [Gabriel]196-gabriel ferrara is sabotaging [Jameson]126-jameson ’s company and is openly making a play for [[his]126-jameson women]1880-his women . [Woman]3347-woman . [I]0-i feel outraged on [his]1874-the tall italian man behalf , and [I]0-i want to march over and tell [Jameson]126-jameson what just happened , but then [I]0-i do n’t want to stress [him]126-jameson out . But maybe that ’s exactly what [Gabriel]196-gabriel ferrara wants — an open war . Shit . . . this is hectic . From [[my]0-i place by [the bar]534-the bar]1882-my place by the bar , [I]0-i watch as [person]1884-person after [person]1884-person goes and strategically says hello to [the Miles family at [their]1886-the miles family at their table table]1886-the miles family at their table , as if wanting to be acknowledged by [them]1886-the miles family at their table . [Tristan]135-tristan is all smiles and happy , and [Jameson]126-jameson and [[his]126-jameson father]3590-his father are polite . It ’s blatantly obvious to [me]0-i that [they]1886-the miles family at their table are not at all seduced or fooled by the fake greetings and well wishes . After the longest conversation in history , [I]0-i make [my]0-i way back to [Jameson]126-jameson . [I]0-i sit beside [him]126-jameson , and [he]126-jameson takes [my]0-i hand in [his]126-jameson and puts it on [his]126-jameson thigh . “ Do [you]126-jameson like [these people]4140-these people [here]275-here ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [His]126-jameson eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ [I]126-jameson like [the people at this table]4142-the people at this table . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i look around nervously . “ What ’s wrong ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks , sensing that something is off . “ Nothing , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i lean in and kiss [him]126-jameson softly on the lips . “ [I]0-i do n’t particularly like [any of [these people]4140-these people]4143-any of these people . ”[0-i] “ [Me]126-jameson neither , and as long as [you]0-i like [me]126-jameson , that ’s all that matters , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson murmurs . [I]0-i smile over at [[my]0-i beautiful man]1888-my beautiful man and lean up to whisper in [his]126-jameson ear , “ [I]0-i more than like [you]126-jameson . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson squeezes [my]0-i hand in [his]126-jameson . “ Two hours , and [we]1889-we can go , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . “ Good . ”[126-jameson] Dinner has been served , [we]1889-we are on to dessert , and the award ceremony is about to take place . The lights are dimmed , and the stage is lit up by a spotlight as [they]1890-they go through the categories . [They]1890-they must start with the smaller awards first . [Jameson]126-jameson sits and stares at the stage as [he]126-jameson holds [my]0-i hand on [his]126-jameson large muscular thigh . [He]126-jameson ’s completely expressionless , and [I]0-i have no idea what [he]126-jameson ’s thinking . [He]126-jameson does it so well , keeps [his]126-jameson emotions completely under control . [Tristan]135-tristan is laughing and talking about the categories with [the other managers sitting at the table]1891-the other managers sitting at the table . [He]126-jameson ’s completely relaxed and having a good night . How are [two brothers]1892-two brothers so different ? [Tristan]135-tristan is open and jovial , and [Jameson]126-jameson is closed and hard . . . at least to [the outside world]1337-the outside world . Although , knowing what [Tristan]135-tristan ’s role is in [the company]3166-the company — acquisitions — [he]126-jameson has to be hard on some level . Perhaps even harder than the rest of [them]3166-the company because [he]126-jameson takes over [companies]1895-companies and dissolves [them]1895-companies . [I]0-i think on it for a moment as [I]0-i stare at [Jameson]126-jameson . No , that ’s impossible — [nobody]3121-nobody could be harder than [Jameson]126-jameson . [My]0-i eyes flick to [[his]126-jameson father]3590-his father , who wears the same steely face as [he]3590-his father watches the stage . . . perhaps [George]121-george is . [I]0-i think back to [Jameson]126-jameson ’s childhood and how [he]126-jameson went to boarding school overseas with [[his]126-jameson brothers]3208-his brothers . How do [you]1899-you learn to be soft and nurturing when [you]1899-you ’re in a cold school environment ? [I]0-i wonder if that is why [he]126-jameson ’s all or nothing with [me]0-i . Does [he]126-jameson have to give [himself]126-jameson permission to feel before [he]126-jameson can physically do it ? It would make sense . [I]0-i mean , since [he]126-jameson told [me]0-i [he]126-jameson wants [me]0-i , [we]1900-we ’ve moved forward in leaps and bounds . Every touch [I]0-i feel [him]126-jameson let [me]0-i in a little more . Is it because [he]126-jameson can finally verbalize things now ? [I]0-i exhale heavily as [I]0-i clap for an award . [My]0-i mind is far from here . [I]0-i ’m fixed on [the complex man [I]0-i ’ve fallen for]1901-the complex man i ’ve fallen for , as [I]0-i try to unravel [his]126-jameson inner demons . Maybe [Jay]158-jay needs to talk about [the company]3166-the company . Maybe [he]158-jay needs someone [he]158-jay does n’t have to pretend with that [he]158-jay has everything under control . [He]158-jay ’s [the CEO of [Miles Media]12-miles media]1903-the ceo of miles media . [The family]1904-the family is looking to [him]158-jay for guidance . Waiting for [him]158-jay to rectify the situation . Of course [he]158-jay ’s stressed . [The reporter in [me]0-i]1905-the reporter in me wants to deal with this situation , find the leak , and fight [our]1906-our way back to the top . [The lover in [me]0-i]1907-the lover in me wants to steal [my]0-i [Jay]158-jay away and take [him]158-jay to [an island in [the Bahamas]43-the bahamas]1908-an island in the bahamas and let [him]158-jay live a peaceful , relaxed lifestyle . . . where the only thing [he]158-jay has to worry about is pushing [[his]158-jay children]1909-his children on a swing . [[His]158-jay children]1909-his children . [I]0-i feel [my]0-i chest constrict as [I]0-i get a peep into the future with [Jameson]126-jameson . Will [[his]158-jay children]1909-his children bear this stress ? Will [they]1909-his children be able to feel [[their]1909-his children father]3256-their father ’s worry through [his]158-jay touch ? [They]1909-his children ’d have to — [I]0-i know [I]0-i do . [God]88-god , [I]0-i need to wind [him]158-jay down so that [he]158-jay can deal with all of this crap . How do [I]0-i do that ? [I]0-i think for a moment and clap on cue as another award is announced . [He]158-jay needs to get out of [New York]3-new york . Yes , that ’s it . A weekend away . Somewhere crazy different . [I]0-i smile as the idea takes shape in [my]0-i mind . “ And now for the major award for the night , ”[1913-the mc] [the MC]1913-the mc announces . “ The Diamond Award for exceptional media coverage goes to . . . ”[1913-the mc] The drum rolls . [He]158-jay opens the envelope and smiles with a shake of [his]158-jay head . “ Well , well . . . it seems [we]1916-we have a changing of [the guard]555-the guard . ”[158-jay] [The crowd]287-the crowd falls silent . “ [Ferrara Media]42-ferrara media . ”[287-the crowd] [The crowd]287-the crowd applauds , and the Ferrara table erupts into cheers . [Jameson]126-jameson clenches [his]126-jameson jaw and sips [his]126-jameson drink . “ Fuck , ”[126-jameson] [Tristan]135-tristan mutters under [his]135-tristan breath . [Our]1916-we table stays silent as [we]1916-we watch [Gabriel Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara take the stage to accept the award . [He]196-gabriel ferrara holds it up in the air , and [the people in the crowd]1917-the people in the crowd all laugh and cheer , and [he]196-gabriel ferrara takes the microphone . “ Thank [you]1916-we . ”[196-gabriel ferrara] [He]196-gabriel ferrara looks around [the room]613-the room . “ It means a lot . Commiserations to [Miles Media]12-miles media , who have won this award consecutively for the last sixteen years . ”[196-gabriel ferrara] [He]196-gabriel ferrara blows a cheeky kiss to [Jameson]126-jameson and then waves down to [our]1916-we table . [Jameson]126-jameson glares at [him]196-gabriel ferrara . [His]196-gabriel ferrara tongue runs across [his]196-gabriel ferrara teeth as sheer contempt drips from [his]196-gabriel ferrara every pore . “ [I]196-gabriel ferrara think it is safe to [say”—Gabriel]200-say”—gabriel[196-gabriel ferrara] smiles sarcastically—“that in the last twelve months [we]1916-we have led the market with [our]1916-we cutting - edge news delivery . ”[196-gabriel ferrara] [He]196-gabriel ferrara holds up [his]196-gabriel ferrara finger . “ [We]1916-we are now [the number one media empire in [the world]268-the world]4146-the number one media empire in the world . ”[196-gabriel ferrara] [The crowd]287-the crowd claps and cheers . [He]196-gabriel ferrara holds the trophy in the air . [The Ferrara table]1920-the ferrara table goes wild . “ [You]196-gabriel ferrara ’ve got to be joking , ”[0-i] [I]0-i scoff , unable to help it . [The Miles family]1401-the miles family glares at [Gabriel]196-gabriel ferrara as [he]196-gabriel ferrara stands on stage . . . and [I]0-i can feel [their]1401-the miles family anger because [I]0-i have it too . [I]0-i can feel it growing inside [me]0-i like a pulsing disease . It ’s one thing to lose [your]1922-your crown , but to have it taken by [a thief who ’s stealing [your]1922-your work]1923-a thief who ’s stealing your work is a completely different ball game . [Gabriel]196-gabriel ferrara bows and then takes a seat back at [his]196-gabriel ferrara table . [He]196-gabriel ferrara kisses the trophy as [the photographers]1924-the photographers snap away . This win will be headlining tomorrow ’s news stories across [the country]3120-the country . Fury and silence sweep around [our]1926-our table . [Nobody]3121-nobody says a word . [I]0-i stare at [him]196-gabriel ferrara across [the room]613-the room and want to wipe that sleazy smile off [his]196-gabriel ferrara gorgeous face . And [I]0-i will . Prepare [yourself]1922-your , [Mr. Gabriel Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara . [I]0-i ’m taking [you]1922-your down . [I]0-i gasp for breath as [I]0-i watch [Jameson]126-jameson lap [me]0-i in [Central Park]22-central park . It ’s six o’clock , and the sun is just rising . [He]126-jameson ’s running particularly fast today . . . and [I]0-i ’m letting [him]126-jameson . [I]0-i get it now ; [his]126-jameson responsibility is not something [he]126-jameson can just switch off at the end of the day . [I]0-i feel it for [him]126-jameson too now . Last night , however infuriating it was , taught [me]0-i a valuable lesson on [[his]126-jameson competitors]1929-his competitors . [They]1929-his competitors have no morals and no fear , and that makes [them]1929-his competitors [very dangerous players]1930-very dangerous players indeed . [Jameson]126-jameson turns and sprints back to [me]0-i . [He]126-jameson ’s always careful [he]126-jameson keeps [me]0-i in [his]126-jameson sight . [He]126-jameson was quiet when [we]1931-we came [home]3076-home last night , deep in thought . [We]1931-we had a shower and made love , and then [he]126-jameson finally relaxed a little . [I]0-i made [us]1931-we a snack , and [we]1931-we lay on the couch in [each other]351-each other ’s arms and watched a movie for a while . [We]1931-we went to bed late , but [we]1931-we needed the time together to wind down . Neither of [us]1931-we brought up the award ceremony . [We]1931-we did n’t speak of it at all — there ’s nothing to say . It is what it is . No amount of conversation can take away the fact that [Ferrara Media]42-ferrara media has been rewarded for being deceitful . It ’s eating [me]0-i alive ; [I]0-i can only imagine what it ’s doing to [Jameson]126-jameson . [He]126-jameson comes to a stop in front of [me]0-i , panting heavily . “ [You]0-i ’re especially slow this morning , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson teases . “ [You]0-i ’re especially fast today . That ax must be big . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson chuckles as [he]126-jameson leans in to kiss [me]0-i . “ Fucking huge . ”[126-jameson] [We]1931-we turn and begin the slow jog back [home]3076-home . “ [I]126-jameson ’ll organize [Alan]152-alan for the weekend to get [your]0-i things ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says as [he]126-jameson runs . “ About that . . . ”[126-jameson] “ Yes ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson pants , still exhausted from [his]126-jameson sprinting . “ [I]126-jameson have a proposal for [you]0-i . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson stops running . “ Such as ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i turn and take [his]126-jameson hands in [mine]0-i . “ [I]0-i ’ll move in with [you]126-jameson on one condition . ”[0-i] “ What ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson stares at [me]0-i as if already annoyed by [my]0-i bartering . “ [I]126-jameson ’ll move in with [you]0-i if [we]4148-we can get out of [New York]3-new york on the weekends . ”[126-jameson] “ What ? ”[0-i] “ Well , not every weekend . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug . “ But enough that [we]4148-we can relax . ”[0-i] “ [New York]3-new york is [[my]0-i home]4149-my home . [I]0-i am relaxed . What are [you]126-jameson talking about , [woman]3347-woman ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile and start jogging again . [He]126-jameson catches up with [me]0-i . “ What ? ”[126-jameson] “ It ’s impossible to relax here , [Jay]158-jay . [This city]1646-this city is hectic . The energy of [this place]459-this place could be seen from space . Sirens sound all night , cars and traffic and [millions of people]4153-millions of people all buzzing at a million miles an hour . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson watches [me]0-i as [he]126-jameson listens . “ [We]4148-we do n’t have to go far out of [the city]3381-the city . [I]126-jameson ’ve already booked a surprise trip away for [us]4148-we this weekend . ”[126-jameson] “ Since when ? ”[126-jameson] “ Since yesterday . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i ’m totally lying through [my]0-i teeth here , but whatever . “ Think about it . [We]4148-we live in [[your]0-i apartment]3695-your apartment through the week and work hard . Then on the weekends , [we]4148-we completely switch off . No phones , no internet . Just [us]4148-we . ”[0-i] “ What ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson frowns . “ That ’s impossible . [I]126-jameson need to be online at all times , [Emily]91-emily . ”[126-jameson] “ No , ”[0-i] [I]0-i pant as [we]1935-we run . “ What [you]0-i need is to recharge so that [you]0-i can be the best CEO [you]0-i can be . [A tired , stressed - out version of [you]0-i]4156-a tired , stressed - out version of you wo n’t be half as switched on . ”[0-i] [We]1935-we run until [we]1935-we hit [the street]654-the street , and then [we]1935-we look both ways as [we]1935-we wait to cross . “ And besides , ”[0-i] [I]0-i pant , “ this way [I]0-i get the best of both worlds . ”[0-i] “ What do [you]1937-his mean ? ”[0-i] “ Well , [I]1937-his ’m utterly in love with [[my]1937-his Jim]4157-my jim , [the man [I]1937-his met on [the plane]291-the plane]4158-the man i met on the plane . ”[1937-his] [He]1937-his listens . “ And [I]1937-his ’m learning to love [the stressed - out CEO who takes over [his]1937-his body]4160-the stressed - out ceo who takes over his body sometimes . ”[1937-his] [Jameson]126-jameson smiles as [he]1937-his runs , finally putting the pieces together . “ This way . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pant . God , why do [I]0-i insist on talking as [I]0-i run ? “ This way [I]1937-his get to spend time with [both of [[my]1937-his men]4162-my men]4161-both of my men . ”[1937-his] [He]1937-his grabs [my]0-i hand and pulls [me]0-i back to [him]1937-his ; [his]1937-his lips take [mine]0-i as [he]1937-his clutches [my]0-i face in [his]1937-his hands . [His]1937-his tongue swipes through [my]0-i lips , and [his]1937-his kiss is electric with just the right amount of suction . [We]1938-we kiss again and again , and [my]0-i hands go to [his]1937-his hips . What must [we]1938-we look like , making out on [the street corner]1939-the street corner ? [My]0-i eyes search [his]1937-his . “ Do [we]1938-we have a deal ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Am [I]0-i moving in ? ”[0-i] [He]1937-his trails [his]1937-his fingers down [my]0-i face . “ [I]1937-his guess [we]1938-we can come to some kind of weekend arrangement . ”[1937-his] [I]0-i smile . “ Only because [both of [[your]0-i men]4164-your men]4163-both of your men love to fuck [you]0-i . ”[1937-his] [He]1937-his grabs [my]0-i hips and bounces them off [his]1937-his . [I]0-i giggle against [his]1937-his lips as [he]1937-his holds [my]0-i head to [his]1937-his . “ [You]1937-his ’re [a sex maniac]4165-a sex maniac , [Miles]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [He]1937-his grabs [my]0-i behind once more , and a car horn sounds . “ Get [a room]833-a room , ”[3093-a man] [a man]3093-a man calls . [We]1941-we both laugh and begin to run across [the street]654-the street . [I]0-i smile over at [him]1937-his as [we]1941-we run . “ What ? ”[1937-his] [He]1937-his smirks . “ Nothing . ”[1937-his] [I]0-i slap [his]1937-his behind . “ Race [you]1937-his [home]3076-home . ”[0-i] [I]0-i take off . “ [I]1937-his could beat [you]1937-his with [my]1937-his legs tied . ”[1937-his] [He]1937-his laughs from behind . “ In fact , if [I]1937-his beat [you]0-i , [I]1937-his am tying [you]0-i up . ”[1937-his] “ Not if [I]0-i tie [you]1937-his up first , ”[0-i] [I]0-i call as [I]0-i sprint . [I]0-i giggle as [I]0-i hear [his]1937-his footsteps behind [me]0-i . Now there ’s an incentive to run fast . Knock , knock . [I]0-i tap on [Tristan]135-tristan ’s door . “ Come in , ”[0-i] [his]1937-his deep voice calls . [I]0-i peek around the door . [Tristan]135-tristan is sitting at [his]135-tristan desk . “ Come in , [Em]91-emily . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan smiles . [Em]91-emily . [I]0-i smile and take a seat at [his]135-tristan desk . [I]0-i ’ve decided that [I]0-i ’m keeping [Tristan]135-tristan completely up to date . . . with everything . [He]135-tristan loves [Jameson]126-jameson , and [he]135-tristan will decipher what [Jay]158-jay needs to know and what [he]158-jay does n’t . [His]135-tristan eyes hold [mine]0-i with a tender glow . “ [You]0-i were a hit with [[our]4168-our parents]4169-our parents last night . ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i smile . “ Really ? ”[0-i] “ [[My]135-tristan mother]403-my mother was gushing about [you]0-i this morning . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan smiles as [he]135-tristan holds [his]135-tristan pen in [his]135-tristan hand and swivels on [his]135-tristan chair . “ [I]135-tristan just wanted to keep [you]0-i updated on a few things . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan frowns . “ Okay . ”[135-tristan] “ [I]0-i ’m going to keep [my]0-i relationship with [Jameson]126-jameson completely unrelated to work . [I]0-i feel [he]135-tristan needs a break from it . ”[0-i] “ [I]135-tristan agree . [He]135-tristan does . ”[135-tristan] “ So , therefore , there are a few things that [I]135-tristan wanted to discuss with [you]135-tristan . ”[135-tristan] “ Great . Fire away . ”[0-i] “ Well , [you]135-tristan know how [we]4171-we ’ve been suspicious of [Hayden]113-hayden ? ”[135-tristan] “ Yes . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan frowns . “ [I]135-tristan found out from [Molly]111-molly — and this is just rumors — that [Hayden]113-hayden was fired from [the Gazette]3444-the gazette for a phone - tapping scandal . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan sits forward in [his]135-tristan seat . “ Like what ? ”[135-tristan] “ Apparently — and honestly , [I]135-tristan have no idea if this is true , but [Molly]111-molly said it was what circulated at the time — [he]113-hayden was tapping [Keely May]111-molly ’s phone and stealing [her]111-molly stories . ”[135-tristan] “ What ? ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan snaps . “ Are [you]135-tristan fucking kidding [me]135-tristan ? ”[135-tristan] “ No . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan smiles broadly . “ This is excellent . This gives [me]135-tristan enough ammunition . ”[135-tristan] “ To do what ? ”[135-tristan] “ To get a search on [his]135-tristan computers . [We]4173-we have n’t tapped [him]135-tristan yet . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile proudly . “ Hopefully this will help [us]4173-we . ”[0-i] “ Good work , [Em]91-emily . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan swivels on [his]135-tristan chair and makes a note . [I]0-i watch [him]135-tristan for a moment . “ There was also something else . ”[0-i] [His]135-tristan eyes rise . “ [I]135-tristan have n’t said anything to [Jameson]126-jameson , but [Gabriel Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara made a pass at [me]135-tristan last night . ”[135-tristan] [His]135-tristan face falls . “ [He]196-gabriel ferrara did what ? ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan snaps . “ Do n’t get excited , ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . “ What did [he]196-gabriel ferrara say ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i think back . “ [I]0-i was at [the bar]534-the bar , and [he]196-gabriel ferrara asked [me]0-i who [I]0-i was . [I]0-i thought [he]196-gabriel ferrara was just being nice , and [I]0-i replied [Emily]91-emily . ”[0-i] [Tristan]135-tristan frowns as [he]135-tristan listens . “ Then [he]196-gabriel ferrara picked up [my]135-tristan hand and kissed the back of it and said , ‘ [My]135-tristan name is [Gabriel Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara , and [I]135-tristan like to take over all things owned by [Jameson Miles]126-jameson . ’ ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan ’s eyes widen . “ Then [he]196-gabriel ferrara said , ‘ [Women]300-women included . ’ ”[135-tristan] “ What the fuck ? ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan snaps . “ Are [you]135-tristan fucking serious ? ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan stands in a rush . “ But [I]135-tristan do n’t know if [I]135-tristan read it the wrong way or . . . , ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i stammer . “ [I]0-i do n’t want to be making more of this than it is , but [I]0-i felt that it was really quite off . ”[0-i] [Tristan]135-tristan ’s eyes blaze with anger . “ What did [you]135-tristan say ? ”[135-tristan] “ [I]0-i told [him]196-gabriel ferrara [he]196-gabriel ferrara was insulting [my]0-i intelligence and to go away . ”[0-i] [I]0-i curl [my]0-i lip in disgust . “ [He]196-gabriel ferrara makes [my]0-i skin crawl . ”[0-i] “ Fucking hell . ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan sighs as [he]135-tristan turns and puts [his]135-tristan hands into [his]135-tristan suit pockets and stares out the window , deep in thought . “ [I]135-tristan did n’t say anything to [Jameson]126-jameson because [I]135-tristan feel like that ’s exactly what [Gabriel]196-gabriel ferrara wanted [me]135-tristan to do . ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan ’s jaw ticks in anger . “ [He]196-gabriel ferrara wants to start a war . ”[135-tristan] “ That ’s what it felt like . . . there could be no other explanation , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [He]196-gabriel ferrara ’s trying to rattle [him]196-gabriel ferrara by attacking [him]196-gabriel ferrara on a personal basis . ”[0-i] “ Yes . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh as [my]0-i heart bleeds for [my]0-i [Jay]158-jay . “ [I]135-tristan worried about whether [I]135-tristan should say anything to [you]135-tristan all night . ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan ’s eyes come to [me]0-i . “ Do n’t tell [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[135-tristan] “ Okay . ”[135-tristan] “ Let ’s keep this between [us]4176-us . ”[0-i] [I]0-i exhale heavily . “ [I]135-tristan ’m concerned about [Jameson]126-jameson , ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan says . “ [He]126-jameson ’s about to fucking crack . ”[135-tristan] “ [I]135-tristan know ; [I]135-tristan ’m going to try to get [him]126-jameson out of [the city]3381-the city for the weekends and get [him]126-jameson offline . [I]135-tristan ’m doing all [I]135-tristan can to keep [him]126-jameson calm . ”[135-tristan] “ Good idea . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan nods , still deep in thought . “ If [you]0-i had told [him]126-jameson about [Gabriel]196-gabriel ferrara , [he]126-jameson would be over there strangling [the fucker]4178-the fucker right now . ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i pinch the bridge of [my]0-i nose . “ [I]0-i know . ”[0-i] “ [You]0-i did the right thing . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan smiles . “ Thank [you]0-i for telling [me]135-tristan . ”[135-tristan] [My]0-i eyes hold [his]135-tristan . “ [I]0-i hate not telling [Jameson]126-jameson , but [I]0-i feel like [I]0-i need to protect [him]126-jameson from this . [Gabriel]196-gabriel ferrara is just trying to rattle [him]126-jameson . ”[0-i] “ [My]135-tristan thoughts exactly , ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan agrees . “ Thanks , [I]135-tristan ’ll get on this now . Can [you]0-i do [me]135-tristan a favor and try to find out as much about [Hayden]113-hayden ’s personal life as [you]0-i can ? Where [he]113-hayden hangs out , [partner]4179-partner , that kind of thing . ”[135-tristan] “ Okay , [I]0-i ’m on it . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stand and leave [[his]135-tristan office]496-his office and walk over to [[Jameson]126-jameson ’s office]3491-jameson ’s office , and [I]0-i knock on the door . “ Come in , ”[135-tristan] [his]135-tristan deep , velvety voice calls . [I]0-i open the door to see [[my]0-i beautiful man]1888-my beautiful man sitting behind [his]135-tristan desk . [He]135-tristan smiles warmly when [he]135-tristan sees [me]0-i and pats [his]135-tristan lap . [I]0-i lock the door and sit on [his]135-tristan lap and take [his]135-tristan lips with [mine]0-i . “ Hello , [boss]4180-boss . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan runs [his]135-tristan hand up [my]0-i thigh . [His]135-tristan mouth goes to [my]0-i neck , and [I]0-i smile , and then [I]0-i see it . A half - empty glass of scotch sitting on [his]135-tristan desk . [I]0-i glance at [my]0-i watch . “ It ’s eleven o’clock , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan rolls [his]135-tristan eyes and pushes [me]0-i off [his]135-tristan lap . “ [I]135-tristan needed something to take the edge off . Do n’t fucking start , [Emily]91-emily . ”[135-tristan] “ Okay , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Are [you]135-tristan okay ? ”[0-i] “ [I]135-tristan ’m fine , ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan snaps as [he]135-tristan turns back to [his]135-tristan desk . “ Three days until [our]4181-our weekend away , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [His]135-tristan phone rings , and [he]135-tristan glances at the screen . “ Ca n’t come soon enough . [I]135-tristan have to take this . See [you]135-tristan tonight . ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i kiss [him]135-tristan softly , and then [he]135-tristan answers the call . [His]135-tristan voice instantly turns to the authoritative tone [he]135-tristan uses with [everyone else]1946-everyone else . [I]0-i stand at the door and watch [him]135-tristan as [he]135-tristan listens . [He]135-tristan mindlessly picks up the scotch and sips it before [he]135-tristan talks . [My]0-i heart drops . [Many a stressed - out CEO]1947-many a stressed - out ceo has been found in the bottom of a Blue Label scotch bottle . Please , not [mine]0-i . . . [I]0-i look around guiltily and then back down to [my]0-i phone , and [I]0-i put into the search bar “ budget weekends away . ”[0-i] “ God , ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh . “ Where can [I]0-i take [him]135-tristan ? ”[0-i] “ Are [you]0-i still going on about that ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron asks . [Molly]111-molly slides [her]111-molly chair to look over [my]0-i shoulder . “ [I]111-molly want to take [him]135-tristan somewhere that money ca n’t buy . ”[111-molly] [I]0-i twist [my]0-i lips as [I]0-i think . “ It has to be something really special . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron chuckles . “ [Your]0-i special and [Jameson Miles]126-jameson ’s special may be a little different . ”[110-aaron] “ The thing is , when [he]135-tristan ’s at [[my]110-aaron apartment]940-my apartment , [he]135-tristan detaches from who [he]135-tristan is . [I]110-aaron want [him]135-tristan to realize that [we]4183-we do n’t need to live in [a swanky apartment]4184-a swanky apartment to be happy . ”[110-aaron] “ [You]0-i ’re fucking crazy . ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly sighs . “ What [I]111-molly would n’t give to live in [[his]135-tristan swanky apartment]4185-his swanky apartment . [Anybody]532-anybody would be happy as a pig in mud there . When are [you]110-aaron inviting [us]4183-we over , [bitch]1817-bitch ? ”[111-molly] “ Right ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron laughs . “ Hmm . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i narrow [my]0-i eyes as [I]0-i think . “ What about camping ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly says . [My]0-i eyes flick to [her]111-molly . “ Oh , but [we]4183-we do n’t have [a tent]4188-a tent or anything , and [I]111-molly wo n’t have time to buy it . ”[111-molly] “ [I]111-molly ’ve got it all . [You]111-molly can borrow [ours]4183-we . [Michael]96-michael and [the kids]3241-the kids go camping all the time . ”[111-molly] [I]0-i stare at [her]111-molly for a moment . “ Do [you]111-molly reckon [he]96-michael ’s ever gone camping before ? ”[0-i] “ Umm . . . that would be a definite no . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron widens [his]110-aaron eyes to accentuate [his]110-aaron point . “ [Nobody]3121-nobody goes camping of [their]3121-nobody own free will . ”[110-aaron] Excitement fills [me]0-i . “ Really ? Could [we]4183-we borrow [your]111-molly things ? [You]111-molly would n’t mind ? ”[110-aaron] “ Not at all . Take it . [Michael]96-michael and [the kids]3241-the kids are going to [Dallas]45-dallas on Friday to see [[his]96-michael parents]3158-his parents for a week . [They]3158-his parents wo n’t be using it . ”[110-aaron] “ Maybe . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile as the idea takes shape in [my]0-i head . “ But [the car]422-the car , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say , thinking out loud . “ Take [[Michael]96-michael ’s pickup truck]4194-michael ’s pickup truck , [Bessie]202-bessie . Give [him]96-michael the full Swamp People experience . ”[0-i] “ Really ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk as [I]0-i imagine [Jameson]126-jameson in [a pickup]1948-a pickup . “ Yeah , it ’s a total piece of shit , but it ’s reliable . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron shakes [his]110-aaron head in disgust . “ Are [you]0-i trying to scare [him]96-michael away on purpose ? ”[110-aaron] “ No , [I]0-i ’m trying to bring [him]96-michael back to [earth]1165-earth . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile as excitement sweeps through [me]0-i . “ [He]96-michael ’ll land with a thud ; that ’s for sure . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron smirks . [I]0-i laugh as [I]0-i begin to google [campgrounds]1949-campgrounds . “ This is going to be so much fun . ”[0-i] On Friday afternoon , [I]0-i drive into [the underground parking lot of [[Jameson]126-jameson ’s building]1951-jameson ’s building]1693-the underground parking lot of jameson ’s building with a huge smile on [my]0-i face . [I]0-i ’ve laughed all the way here from [[Molly]111-molly ’s house]1952-molly ’s house . [I]0-i ’ve called [Jay]158-jay and told [him]158-jay to be waiting near the door for [me]0-i to collect [him]158-jay . [I]0-i drive around the corner , and [I]0-i see [him]158-jay standing there waiting with [Alan]152-alan and [our]1953-our bags . [He]158-jay sees [me]0-i , and [his]158-jay face drops . [I]0-i honk the horn and bounce in the seat and pull [Bessie]202-bessie [the pickup truck]1954-the pickup truck up beside [him]158-jay . [His]158-jay face horrified , [he]158-jay comes to [me]0-i , and [I]0-i roll down the window . “ Going [my]0-i way ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ What the fuck is this ? ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay gasps . “ This is [Bessie]202-bessie . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i smile proudly . [Alan]152-alan puts [his]152-alan hand over [his]152-alan mouth to stop [himself]152-alan from laughing out loud . “ What ? ”[152-alan] [Jameson]126-jameson frowns as [he]126-jameson looks at [the huge , beat - up light - blue truck]1955-the huge , beat - up light - blue truck . [His]126-jameson eyes come back to [me]0-i . “ Get in , [Miles]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smile and wiggle [my]0-i eyebrows . “ [I]0-i ’m taking [you]158-jay camping . ”[0-i] Chapter 19 [He]158-jay stares at [me]0-i , lost for words . [Alan]152-alan drops [his]152-alan head as [his]158-jay chuckle breaks through . [Jameson]126-jameson stares at [me]0-i . . . horrified . [I]0-i laugh out loud at the look on [his]126-jameson face . [I]0-i put [the pickup]1956-the pickup into park and jump out and start throwing [our]1957-our bags into the back . “ [You]0-i ca n’t be serious , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson stammers . “ [Deadly]134-deadly . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson eyes scan [the beat - up old truck]1958-the beat - up old truck . “ [This car]4037-this car is n’t even roadworthy . ”[126-jameson] “ It ’s not [a car]1671-a car — it ’s [a truck]4198-a truck . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i slam the back shut . “ [Her]4037-this car name is [Bessie]202-bessie . ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson puts [his]126-jameson hands on [his]126-jameson hips . [His]126-jameson eyes glance to [Alan]152-alan , who is laughing out loud . “ This is n’t fucking funny , [Alan]152-alan , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson snaps . “ [I]126-jameson do n’t camp , [Emily]91-emily . Surely [you]91-emily would know this . What on [[God]88-god ’s earth]4199-god ’s earth would make [you]91-emily think of this cockamamie idea ? This is not relaxing [me]126-jameson in the slightest . [I]126-jameson can feel [my]126-jameson blood pressure skyrocketing by the second . ”[126-jameson] [Alan]152-alan drops [his]152-alan head and really begins to laugh . “ Forgive [me]126-jameson , [boss man]4200-boss man , but this is the funniest thing [I]126-jameson ’ve ever seen . Can [I]126-jameson take a photo for [Tris]135-tristan ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks . “ Absolutely not , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson huffs . “ Shut up , or [I]126-jameson ’ll make [you]152-alan come with [us]4201-we . ”[126-jameson] [Alan]152-alan bites [his]152-alan bottom lip to stop the giggles . “ Why would [we]4201-we need to take this . . . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan pauses as [he]152-alan finds the right word . “ Hunk of junk ? ”[152-alan] “ Because [we]4201-we ’re going off the grid . ”[152-alan] “ [Emily Foster]91-emily , this is n’t off the grid . This is a recipe for instantaneous death . ”[0-i] [I]0-i slump in the seat and pull a whiny face . “ [You]152-alan promised . It ’s three days , [Jameson]126-jameson , and then [I]0-i ’ll come back and move in . ”[0-i] [He]152-alan puts [his]152-alan hands on [his]152-alan hips and rolls [his]152-alan eyes , and [he]152-alan knows [I]0-i ’ve got [him]152-alan . [He]152-alan did promise . [I]0-i toot the horn , and [he]152-alan comes around to [the driver]635-the driver ’s side and opens the door . “ What are [you]152-alan doing ? ”[152-alan] [I]0-i frown . “ Driving . ”[0-i] “ Do [you]152-alan know how to drive a column shift ? ”[0-i] “ A what ? ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan frowns . [I]0-i point to the gear stick on the steering wheel . [His]152-alan face screws up . “ Is this even legal to have on [the road]638-the road ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i laugh . “ Yes . ”[0-i] “ Then get out . [I]152-alan ’m driving . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan pulls [me]0-i from [the car]422-the car , and [I]0-i jump around to the passenger side and climb in . [He]152-alan gets in and goes through the gears with a look of sheer concentration on [his]152-alan face . [Alan]152-alan and [I]0-i giggle at [each other]351-each other as [we]1962-we wait for [him]152-alan to work it out . “ Okay , [I]126-jameson ’ve got this , ”[126-jameson] replies [Jameson Miles]126-jameson , [the control freak]1963-the control freak . “ Let ’s go , ”[0-i] [I]0-i sing . “ Toot the horn for [Alan]152-alan . ”[0-i] [Jameson]126-jameson looks over at [me]0-i deadpan , and [I]0-i do a “ toot the horn ”[0-i] signal that [I]0-i used to do to [passing trucks]1964-passing trucks when [I]0-i was [a child]1965-a child . “ [Emily]91-emily , [I]0-i do n’t know what that means , but it ’s a surefire way to get thrown in the trunk . ”[0-i] [Alan]152-alan bursts out laughing again , and [I]0-i bounce in the seat in excitement . “ Bye , [Alan]152-alan , ”[0-i] [I]0-i call . [He]152-alan waves . [Jameson]126-jameson stops and calls to [Alan]152-alan through the open window . “ Have [your]152-alan phone on . [We]4203-we ’re going to need [you]152-alan to pick [us]4203-we up from the side of [the road]638-the road in approximately seventeen miles when [we]4203-we break down . ”[152-alan] [Alan]152-alan and [I]0-i laugh again , and as [Alan]152-alan waves , [Jameson]126-jameson bunny hops [the pickup]1956-the pickup out of [the parking lot]1698-the parking lot . [We]1968-we get to the security gates , and [he]152-alan ’s too high and ca n’t swipe [his]152-alan card . “ Fuck this piece of junk , ”[152-alan] [he]152-alan mutters under [his]152-alan breath as [he]152-alan puts [the car]422-the car in park and gets out to open the gates . [He]152-alan swipes [his]152-alan card , and the gates slowly open . [He]152-alan jumps back in and revs [the truck]1970-the truck , and [it]1970-the truck bunny hops up [the driveway]1971-the driveway to the sound of gears crunching . “ Fuck . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan winces . “ Who owns this piece of shit , anyway ? ”[152-alan] [he]152-alan asks as [we]1968-we pull out into the [New York]3-new york traffic . “ [Michael]96-michael , [[Molly]111-molly ’s husband]4205-molly ’s husband . ”[152-alan] [His]152-alan eyes flick to [me]0-i . “ Is n’t that [the fucking idiot who OD’d on Viagra]4206-the fucking idiot who od’d on viagra , and [you]0-i had to take [him]96-michael to [the emergency room]4207-the emergency room ? ”[152-alan] “ That ’s [him]96-michael . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ Figures , ”[152-alan] [he]152-alan mutters as [he]152-alan drives . “ Okay , where are [we]1968-we going ? ”[152-alan] [I]0-i pull up [my]0-i maps on [my]0-i phone . “ Okay . . . [we]1968-we need to get on [the interstate]4208-the interstate . ”[0-i] [He]152-alan looks at [me]0-i in question . “ [We]1968-we ’re going to [High Point State Park]4209-high point state park , [New Jersey]46-new jersey . ”[152-alan] “ What ? ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan frowns . “ What in the hell is there ? ”[152-alan] “ [Me]0-i . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i lean over and kiss the side of [his]152-alan face . “ Nothing but [me]0-i . ”[0-i] [He]152-alan smiles as [he]152-alan keeps [his]152-alan eyes on [the road]638-the road and slides [his]152-alan hand over to [my]0-i thigh and gives it a squeeze . “ Lucky [you]0-i ’re [my]152-alan favorite thing , then , is n’t it ? ”[152-alan] A huge beaming smile is plastered across [my]0-i face . [He]152-alan ’s actually doing this . “ It sure is . ”[0-i] [I]0-i lean over and begin to kiss [him]152-alan all over [his]152-alan cheek . [He]152-alan scrunches [his]152-alan face up . “ Stop . It ’s hard enough to drive Bitchy as it is . ”[152-alan] “ [Her]4210-her name is [Bessie]202-bessie , not Bitchy . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan smirks . “ [We]1973-we ’ll see if [she]4210-her gets [us]1973-we [home]3076-home in one piece , shall [we]1973-we ? ”[152-alan] Two hours later , [we]1973-we see the sign into [High Point State Park]47-high point state park . There ’s [a dirt road]1974-a dirt road , and [Jameson]126-jameson looks over at [me]0-i in question . “ Is this it ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i shrug , suddenly feeling a little nervous . “ Uh - huh . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i look around . “ [I]0-i think so . ”[0-i] [I]0-i really need this weekend to work out ; [I]0-i want [us]1973-we to have fun and relax . Deep down [I]0-i know that if [Jay]158-jay does n’t get a handle on [his]158-jay stress from work , [I]0-i may lose [him]158-jay anyway . [His]158-jay temper is not something [I]0-i could live with long term . [We]1973-we turn off [the main road]1975-the main road and drive down [the track]1976-the track . [We]1973-we both fall silent as [we]1973-we follow [the trail]1977-the trail . [I]0-i study the map on [my]0-i phone . “ It says here to go right to the end of [this road]4212-this road and then turn right . ”[0-i] “ Okay , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay replies as [the truck]1970-the truck bounces around on [the rough road]1979-the rough road . [His]158-jay eyes glance over to [me]0-i . “ Are [you]158-jay sure it ’s down here ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug . “ That ’s what it says here . ”[0-i] The trees are tall and are blocking out the last of the sun . “ [I]126-jameson saw a documentary made [here]275-here once , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson says as [he]126-jameson concentrates on [the road]638-the road . “ What was that ? ”[126-jameson] “ The Blair Witch Project , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay mutters dryly . [I]0-i get the giggles as [we]1973-we go farther and farther into [the forest]1981-the forest . What the hell was [I]0-i thinking ? This is freaking even [me]0-i out . [We]1973-we pass [a campsite on the left]1982-a campsite on the left as [we]1973-we go down [the hill]1983-the hill . There ’s a small tent , and [two teenage boys]1984-two teenage boys are sitting at an open campfire . [I]0-i watch [them]1984-two teenage boys as [we]1973-we pass . “ [They]1984-two teenage boys look like [they]1984-two teenage boys ’re having fun . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ [They]1984-two teenage boys ’re about to go into [the tent]4214-the tent and take turns fucking [each other]351-each other , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay mutters . “ Only logical explanation as to why [they]1984-two teenage boys would come out here . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk . “ Will [you]158-jay stop being so pessimistic ? It ’s three nights , and [we]1973-we get to be alone without [anyone around]4216-anyone around . ”[0-i] [He]158-jay nods and then frowns as [he]158-jay thinks of something . “ Where are [the bathrooms]4217-the bathrooms ? ”[158-jay] [His]158-jay eyes flick to [me]0-i . “ [We]1973-we have [[our]1973-we own bathroom]4218-our own bathroom , right ? ”[158-jay] “ Well . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause . “ Well , what ? ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay snaps . “ [I]158-jay am not fucking staying anywhere without [a bathroom]4219-a bathroom , [Emily]91-emily . ”[158-jay] “ There are [bathrooms]4220-bathrooms . ”[0-i] [I]0-i turn the phone map around as [I]0-i try to locate where [they]1985-they are from [[our]1986-we tent]1987-our tent . “ Ah yes , here they are . Just a short trek . ”[0-i] “ A trek ? ”[158-jay] [His]158-jay eyes flick anxiously to [me]0-i . “ Define trek . ”[158-jay] Oh man , it ’s a long trek , but [I]0-i wo n’t tell [him]158-jay that just yet . [He]158-jay ’s likely to turn around . “ [It]4221-it ’s close — don’t worry , ”[0-i] [I]0-i lie . [We]1986-we get to [the bottom of [the hill]1983-the hill]1988-the bottom of the hill , and [the road]638-the road goes into [a fork]1991-a fork . [A lake]1992-a lake is straight ahead , and the sunlight is just beginning to fade . [I]0-i smile in excitement . “ Turn right . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay carefully turns right , and [we]1986-we go along a little bit . “ Should be just up here . ”[158-jay] “ Where ? ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay frowns . “ Just park anywhere . ”[158-jay] “ What do [you]0-i mean ? ”[158-jay] [His]158-jay eyes come over to [me]0-i . “ [We]1986-we just set up where [we]1986-we want . ”[158-jay] “ What , like”—he[158-jay] screws up [his]158-jay face as [he]158-jay looks around—“on the dirt ? ”[158-jay] [I]0-i laugh . “ Were [you]0-i expecting oak parquetry floor ? ”[0-i] [He]158-jay rolls [his]158-jay eyes and parks [the truck]1970-the truck , and [I]0-i get out and walk up and down [the water]1994-the water ’s edge . “ What are [you]0-i doing ? ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay asks . “ Looking for a good spot to set up . It needs to be high and flat . ”[158-jay] “ Why high ? ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay asks as [he]158-jay starts to look around . “ In case it rains . ”[158-jay] [His]158-jay eyes come to [me]0-i in horror . “ Do n’t even say that . ”[158-jay] “ Quick , [we]1986-we have to get a move on . ”[158-jay] “ Why ? ”[158-jay] “ It ’s getting dark . [We]1986-we ’re running out of sunlight . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay looks up at the sky . “ Do [we]1986-we have lighting ? ”[158-jay] “ [We]1986-we have a flashlight and two of those little headlight things that strap on [our]1986-we heads . ”[158-jay] “ Good grief , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay snaps as [he]158-jay begins to throw the things out of the back with urgency . “ [I]158-jay ’m not wearing a fucking strap - on headlight in [this stupid man - versus - wild experiment]4222-this stupid man - versus - wild experiment . It ’s bad enough when [I]158-jay can see . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i laugh as [I]0-i grab the tent in its bag and begin to unpack it . [I]0-i hand [him]158-jay the broom . “ Sweep the dirt . ”[0-i] [He]158-jay looks at [me]0-i , completely lost . “ What ? ”[158-jay] “ Sweep the dirt — clear a patch for [us]1986-we . No sticks or anything can be under [the tent]4214-the tent . ”[0-i] “ Sweep the dirt , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay repeats . “ Yes , [Jameson]126-jameson . Hurry up , or [you]158-jay will be doing it in the dark . ”[158-jay] “ [Jesus Christ]150-jesus . . . now [I]158-jay ’ve heard it all , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay mutters as [he]158-jay begins to sweep a patch of dirt to clear it . “ Who sweeps fucking dirt ? ”[158-jay] “ [Campers]4224-campers . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk as [I]0-i open the instructions , and then [my]0-i face falls . The instructions look like [they]1995-they ’re to build a nuclear reactor . Oh jeez , [Molly]111-molly said it was easy to put up . Okay . . . whatever . It will be fine . [I]0-i inwardly begin to panic . [We]1996-we are not going [home]3076-home . [I]0-i spread [the tent]4214-the tent out , and [I]0-i hear a slap . “ Ow . ”[0-i] [I]0-i keep concentrating as [I]0-i get the poles out of [their]1999-their bag . [I]0-i hear another slap . “ What the hell ? ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay cries . “ What ? ”[158-jay] “ These bugs are from [Jurassic Park]48-jurassic park . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay swings [his]158-jay arms around to get them off [him]158-jay . “ No bugs are this big . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i go back to [my]0-i instructions . Okay , so it says here that this pole goes into this . . . “ Ahh , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay cries as [he]158-jay slaps [his]158-jay arm . “ [I]158-jay ’m getting fucking malaria over here , [Emily]91-emily . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . “ Stop being [a baby]4225-a baby . ”[0-i] [I]0-i put the pole into the correct place . “ Can [you]0-i grab the corner and stretch it out , please ? ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay swings [his]158-jay arms around and goes and gets the corner of [the tent]4214-the tent and stretches it out . The sun is just setting . “ Step back a little farther , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say . [He]158-jay slaps [his]158-jay legs . “ Fuck off , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay whispers as [he]158-jay swings [his]158-jay arms around , trying to swat whatever it is [he]158-jay ’s swatting . “ Step back farther . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay walks backward and trips over a rock and falls into a bush . “ Ah , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay cries . “ Oh . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i burst out laughing and run to help [him]158-jay up . “ What kind of fucking lunatic does this for fun ? ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay splutters as [he]158-jay climbs out of the bush . “ [We]4226-we do . ”[0-i] [I]0-i laugh . “ This is n’t fun , [Emily]91-emily , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay huffs as [he]158-jay brushes the dirt off [him]158-jay . “ This is a living hell in [a hydroponic mutated - bug breeding zone]4227-a hydroponic mutated - bug breeding zone . ”[158-jay] Something bites [him]158-jay again , and [he]158-jay slaps [his]158-jay neck . “ Fuck off , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay whispers to the bug . “ For [God]88-god ’s sake , get the bug spray , [princess]4228-princess . It ’s in the bag of supplies in [the truck]1970-the truck . ”[158-jay] “ [We]4226-we have bug spray ? ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay looks at [me]0-i deadpan . “ Now [you]0-i fucking tell [me]158-jay , after [I]158-jay ’ve lost four pints of blood already . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay storms to [the truck]1970-the truck , and [I]0-i hear the spray can go . . . and go . . . and go . . . and go . “ Are [you]158-jay saving any for [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i call . “ This is [man]3269-man versus wild , and [every man]4231-every man is for [himself]4231-every man . Do n’t [you]0-i watch [Survivor]203-survivor ? [I]158-jay ’m voting [you]0-i off [the island]4232-the island tonight , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay calls before launching into a coughing attack and waving the air in front of [him]158-jay . “ What the hell is in this stuff , anyway ? ”[158-jay] “ Poison . ”[0-i] [I]0-i widen [my]0-i eyes . “ To kill the bugs . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay storms back over . “ Hurry up with [the tent]4214-the tent , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay demands . “ What ’s taking so long ? ”[158-jay] “ [You]158-jay put it up if [you]158-jay ’re so perfect , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ Fine . ”[0-i] [He]158-jay snatches the directions from [me]0-i and stares at them for a moment as [his]158-jay eyes flick to [the outstretched tent]2002-the outstretched tent . [He]158-jay turns the paper around and twists [his]158-jay head . “ Well , this all makes perfect sense now . ”[158-jay] “ [It]4234-it does ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ [I]0-i could n’t work it out at all . ”[0-i] “ This is n’t directions to put up [a tent]4188-a tent — this is a map for an escape from [Alcatraz]49-alcatraz . ”[0-i] [I]0-i burst out laughing . “ What ’s funny ? ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay barks . “ Nothing about this situation is funny , [Emily]91-emily . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay turns the page and then turns it again and then again . [We]2003-we both frown as [we]2003-we stare at it . “ Okay , [I]158-jay see now . ”[158-jay] “ [You]158-jay do ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask hopefully . “ No . [I]0-i do n’t . [We]2003-we find [a hotel]3129-a hotel . ”[0-i] “ [Jameson]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i plead . “ [I]0-i wanted to do something with [you]158-jay that [you]158-jay ’ve never done with [an ex - girlfriend]4237-an ex - girlfriend . [I]0-i just wanted [us]2003-we to do this first together . Will [you]158-jay just humor [me]0-i , please ? ”[0-i] [He]158-jay exhales heavily . [I]0-i take [his]158-jay hands in [mine]0-i . “ [I]0-i know this is n’t what [you]158-jay ’re used to , but [I]0-i wanted to take [you]158-jay out of [your]158-jay comfort zone . [I]0-i really want to do this — it ’s important to [me]0-i . This is how uncomfortable [I]0-i feel in [[your]158-jay fancy apartment]3705-your fancy apartment . ”[0-i] “ Not possible . ”[158-jay] [His]158-jay eyes hold [mine]0-i , and then [he]158-jay exhales in defeat . “ Fine . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay begins to study the directions again ; the light is fading , and [he]158-jay ’s squinting to see . [I]0-i go to the supply box and take out the two headlights and put one on [his]158-jay head and then [my]0-i own . [I]0-i switch them on . [He]158-jay looks up at [me]0-i deadpan . [I]0-i put [my]0-i hand over [my]0-i mouth as [I]0-i get the giggles , and [he]158-jay continues reading the directions . “ Okay , it says the poles are in a separate bag , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay says . “ Got them . ”[158-jay] “ And [we]4239-we need to peg out the corners . ”[158-jay] “ Already done it . ”[0-i] [I]0-i rub [my]0-i hand down [his]158-jay back and onto [his]158-jay behind . [He]158-jay swats [me]0-i away . “ [We]4239-we need to put the poles in the end and hoist them up . ”[158-jay] “ Okay . ”[0-i] [I]0-i lean up to kiss [him]158-jay . “ [Emily]91-emily . ”[0-i] [He]158-jay looks at [me]0-i , and the flashlight strapped to [his]158-jay forehead shines in [my]0-i eyes . “ [I]158-jay smell like [a toxic dumping ground of bug poison]4240-a toxic dumping ground of bug poison , and [I]158-jay have never felt so unsexy in [my]158-jay entire life . [I]158-jay would n’t be surprised if [my]158-jay dick has been poisoned off like a weed . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i burst out laughing . “ [You]158-jay could never be unsexy to [me]0-i , and [your]158-jay dick is more of a tree than a weed . ”[0-i] [He]158-jay raises [his]158-jay eyebrow , unimpressed . [I]0-i get the uncontrollable giggles . [He]158-jay really does look ridiculous . [I]0-i want to take a photo for [Alan]152-alan , but [I]0-i know [he]158-jay would go postal . [He]158-jay ’s teetering on the edge here . “ Okay , let ’s just get in and do it , and then [we]4241-we can pump up the bed . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . [His]158-jay face falls . “ [We]4241-we have to pump up a bed ? ”[158-jay] “ No . [You]158-jay have to blow it up with [your]158-jay mouth , ”[0-i] [I]0-i tease . [He]158-jay throws the directions in the air . “ That ’s it — [I’m]0-i out . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i burst out laughing . “ No , [you]158-jay do n’t . [I]0-i ’m only teasing . [We]4241-we have a pump . ”[0-i] [He]158-jay puts [his]158-jay hand on [his]158-jay hips and stares at [me]0-i for a moment . “ [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i smile softly . “ This weekend is symbolic in [our]4241-we relationship . [You]126-jameson ’re expecting [me]158-jay to give up everything [I]158-jay know to live in a world that ’s completely foreign to [me]158-jay . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay stares at [me]0-i . “ [I]158-jay ’m just asking [you]0-i for three days . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i bounce on the spot . “ Please . Can [you]158-jay just do this . . . for [me]158-jay ? ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay pinches the bridge of [his]158-jay nose , and [I]0-i know [I]0-i ’ve nearly got [him]158-jay . [I]0-i lean up and kiss [his]158-jay big lips . “ [I]0-i ’ll make it up to [you]158-jay . [I]0-i promise . ”[0-i] “ Fine , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay snaps as [he]158-jay bends and picks the directions up and begins to reread them . “ Get [me]158-jay the longest pole . ”[158-jay] Two hours later , [the tent]4214-the tent is finally up . The bed is ready , and [I]0-i put out two fold - up chairs . “ Come sit with [me]0-i . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i open a bottle of red wine . [He]158-jay sits down beside [me]0-i , and [I]0-i pass [him]158-jay [his]158-jay glass . [I]0-i brought two wineglasses . [I]0-i knew if [I]0-i tried to make [him]158-jay drink out of a plastic cup , it would have been all over . [He]158-jay sits in [his]158-jay cheap fold - up chair and takes [his]158-jay glass from [me]0-i , and [I]0-i smile and raise mine to [him]158-jay . “ To a successful escape from [Alcatraz]49-alcatraz . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay smirks and takes a sip and looks around at the darkness . “ Okay , so what do [we]4242-we do now ? ”[158-jay] “ This is it . ”[158-jay] “ This is it ? ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay frowns . “ Yeah . . . [you]0-i just sit here . ”[158-jay] “ And do what ? ”[158-jay] “ Relax . ”[158-jay] “ Oh . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay looks around at [the dark forest]2005-the dark forest and sips [his]158-jay wine , and [I]0-i bite [my]0-i bottom lip to stop [myself]0-i from laughing . It ’s completely dark now , and [the forest]1981-the forest is beginning to come alive with animals . [Echoes]204-echoes can be heard in the distance . [He]158-jay ’s in complete freak - out mode inside and holding it in . [He]158-jay tips [his]158-jay head back and drains [his]158-jay glass and holds it out for an immediate refill . “ What are [you]158-jay doing ? ”[158-jay] “ [I]158-jay ’m getting plastered so [I]158-jay do n’t remember getting eaten by a bear . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay shakes [his]158-jay head . “ It ’s the only way . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i laugh . “ This is completely safe , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[0-i] [He]158-jay widens [his]158-jay eyes . “ That ’s what [Daniel]142-daniel said right before [he]142-daniel went missing . ”[158-jay] “ Who ’s [Daniel]142-daniel ? ”[158-jay] “ Blair Witch [Daniel]142-daniel . . . ever watched it ? ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay mutters dryly as [he]158-jay looks around . “ No . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i smirk . “ Probably best [you]158-jay do n’t . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay looks around at [the forest]1981-the forest . “ Hauntingly familiar . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i laugh as [I]0-i get up . “ [I]0-i ’m going to [the bathroom]328-the bathroom . ”[0-i] “ What ? ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay stands in a rush . “ Where ’s that ? ”[158-jay] “ Up [the trail]1977-the trail . ”[158-jay] [His]158-jay face falls . “ [You]0-i ca n’t walk up there alone . It ’s dangerous . ”[158-jay] “ No . [I]158-jay ’m not . [You]158-jay ’re coming with [me]158-jay . ”[158-jay] “ What ? ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay frowns . “ Come on , [Jay]158-jay . ”[158-jay] “ No , [we]4245-we are not leaving [the campsite]4246-the campsite . [I]0-i do n’t want to be walking around . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i look down at [the lake]2008-the lake . The moonlight is dancing across [the water]1994-the water . “ All right . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stand and take [my]0-i shirt off and then slide [my]0-i panties down . “ What are [you]158-jay doing ? ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i ’m going skinny - dipping . ”[0-i] “ What ? ”[158-jay] [His]158-jay eyes flick to the black water . “ No . . . no [you]0-i ’re not . [I]158-jay forbid it . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i take off [my]0-i bra and throw it over [his]158-jay head , and [he]158-jay snatches it away . “ [Emily]91-emily . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i kick [my]0-i panties off . “ Have [you]0-i gone completely fucking crazy ? ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay whispers . “ Maybe . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay looks around . “ [Anybody]532-anybody could be watching . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i smile and run to [the water]1994-the water ’s edge . “ [You]158-jay coming in , [chicken]4248-chicken ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i wade thigh high into the water . “ Are [you]0-i fucking insane ? ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay cries from [the water]1994-the water ’s edge . [I]0-i splash water [his]158-jay way . “ Get in , yellowbelly . ”[0-i] [He]158-jay runs [his]158-jay hands through [his]158-jay hair in a complete panic . “ [Emily]91-emily , this is not safe . ”[158-jay] “ This is a lot safer than [New York]3-new york , [Jay]158-jay . Come on . . . live a little . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay looks left , and then [he]158-jay looks right as [he]158-jay clenches [his]158-jay hands at [his]158-jay sides . “ [Jay]158-jay , come on , [baby]3139-baby . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i lower [myself]0-i into the water . “ [I]0-i ’ll protect [you]3139-baby . ”[0-i] [He]158-jay closes [his]158-jay eyes . [He]158-jay wants to come in — [I]0-i know [he]158-jay does . “ Come on . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i laugh as [I]0-i swim . “ [The water]1994-the water is beautiful . ”[0-i] With a shake of [his]158-jay head , [he]158-jay takes [his]158-jay shirt off and throws it to the side . [I]0-i laugh as [I]0-i float on [my]0-i back . [He]158-jay begins to wade into [the water]1994-the water . “ Take [your]0-i shorts off . ”[158-jay] “ No way in hell am [I]158-jay offering [my]158-jay dick as live bait for a fucking eel , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay barks . [He]158-jay wades to [me]0-i and takes [me]0-i into [his]158-jay arms . The water is cold and fresh , and [I]0-i wrap [my]0-i arms around [his]158-jay neck . The moonlight is beaming off the water , and [he]158-jay smiles as [he]158-jay kisses [me]0-i gently . “ [You]0-i ’re crazy , [Emily Foster]91-emily . ”[158-jay] “ And [I]0-i love [you]158-jay . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile up at [him]158-jay . This does feel crazy . . . crazy good . “ [You]0-i better . ”[158-jay] [His]158-jay lips dust [mine]0-i . [I]0-i wrap [my]0-i legs around [his]158-jay waist as [I]0-i feel [my]0-i arousal wake from its slumber . [Our]2013-we kiss turns passionate . “ [I]0-i think [we]2013-we need to christen [the lake]2008-the lake , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper up at [him]158-jay . “ [You]158-jay ’re [a complete sex maniac]3767-a complete sex maniac . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i kiss [him]158-jay and pull [his]158-jay shorts down a little . “ [We]2013-we ’ve already established this . Now fuck [me]0-i , [Lake Boy]102-boy , before [your]158-jay wiener gets eaten , and [I]0-i do n’t mean by [me]0-i . ”[0-i] [He]158-jay smirks against [my]0-i lips as [he]158-jay grabs [my]0-i behind . “ Shut up . [You]0-i ’re wrecking it . ”[158-jay] Drop . Drop . Drop , drop . From [my]0-i deep slumber , [I]0-i hear rain as it sprinkles onto [the tent]4214-the tent . Drop , drop , drop . It gets heavier . “ Do n’t fucking tell [me]126-jameson , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson whispers from beside [me]0-i . Crash sounds the thunder , and [we]2015-we both jump in fright as [the forest]1981-the forest flashes white . “ [You]0-i ca n’t be serious , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay mutters into the darkness . [My]0-i back is to [Jay]158-jay , and [I]0-i bite [my]0-i lip to try to stop [myself]0-i from laughing . [He]158-jay had a complete meltdown when [we]2015-we got into bed over the sound of the animals in [the forest]1981-the forest keeping [him]158-jay awake — in fact , [he]158-jay ’s had about ten meltdowns . This will be the icing on the cake . The rain really begins to come down , and thunder begins to crack repeatedly . “ Well , this is just fucking great , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay huffs . [I]0-i smile and roll over to face [him]158-jay . “ It ’s fine . [Tents]4253-tents are waterproof . Just go back to sleep . ”[0-i] [The tent]4214-the tent continually lights up an iridescent white as lightning flashes through the sky . [He]158-jay sits up and feels around [the tent]4214-the tent in the dark . [He]158-jay ’s foraging for a long time on [his]158-jay hands and knees . “ What are [you]158-jay doing ? ”[158-jay] “ Looking for a fucking light ! ”[0-i] [I]0-i laugh out loud . “ How do [you]158-jay find this funny ? Not one fucking thing about this is funny , [Emily]91-emily . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay finally finds the light and puts it on [his]158-jay head and switches it on and looks at [me]0-i . [His]158-jay hair is all mussed and sticking up everywhere , and [his]158-jay eyes are wide and crazy . Unable to help it , [I]0-i get an uncontrollable fit of the giggles . “ What ? ”[0-i] “ If [you]158-jay could . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i have to stop talking because [I]0-i ’m laughing so much . “ If [you]0-i could just see [yourself]0-i . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay smirks , and then a crash of lightning hits so close it sounds like it hit a tree right next to [us]2020-we . “ [We]2020-we ’re going to fucking die tonight , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay stammers in a panic . The rain hammers down , and [I]0-i unzip [the tent]4214-the tent . [We]2020-we both peer out into the apocalyptic storm . It ’s really pouring down , and [I]0-i zip [the tent]4214-the tent back up . “ It ’s fine . [The tent]4214-the tent is waterproof , and [we]2020-we ’ll just have to try to sleep through it . ”[0-i] “ Have [you]0-i lost [your]0-i fucking mind ? ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay snaps . “ Who could sleep through this ? ”[158-jay] “ [Me]0-i — [I]0-i could . ”[0-i] [I]0-i lie back down and pull the sleeping bag blanket over [me]0-i . [I]0-i smile when [I]0-i remember [Jameson]126-jameson ’s earlier meltdown that [he]158-jay could n’t touch [me]0-i in [my]0-i sleeping bag . In an hour - long operation , [he]158-jay unzipped both of [our]2020-we bags and put one underneath [us]2020-we and one over the top of [us]2020-we so that [we]2020-we could cuddle while [we]2020-we sleep . [He]158-jay ’s super cute . [The tent]4214-the tent begins to sway side to side as the windstorm picks up . “ Holy fucking . . . here [we]2020-we go , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay mutters as [he]158-jay looks at the ceiling of [the tent]4214-the tent . One end of [the tent]4214-the tent lifts up in the wind , and [he]158-jay pounces over and holds [the tent]4214-the tent to the ground . [I]0-i burst out laughing again . “ Not helping , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay cries . [I]0-i jump up in [my]0-i fits of giggles and grab [his]158-jay jacket and begin to put it on . “ What are [you]0-i doing ? ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay frowns . “ [I]158-jay have to hammer the tent pegs back in . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i put [my]0-i headlamp on [my]0-i head . [His]158-jay mouth drops open in horror . “ What ? ”[158-jay] “ It ’s the only way [the tent]4214-the tent will stay up . ”[158-jay] “ [You]0-i ’re not going out there . It ’s dangerous , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay whispers angrily . “ [Somebody]271-somebody has to do it . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i pick up the hammer . [He]158-jay snatches the hammer from [me]0-i . “ This will fucking do [me]158-jay in . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i laugh . “ Goodbye , [Emily]91-emily . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay unzips [the tent]4214-the tent . “ It was nice knowing [you]0-i . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay disappears out into the storm . “ This is why [you]158-jay ’re [the CEO]3206-the ceo . ”[0-i] [I]0-i giggle as [I]0-i hear the metallic bangs as [he]158-jay hammers the tent pegs back in . The rain really begins to pour down , and the wind is ferocious . Honestly , what are the chances ? Damn [you]2028-you , weather . [I]0-i unzip [the tent]4214-the tent and peer out into the pouring rain . [He]158-jay ’s struggling to stay on [his]158-jay feet from the wind as [he]158-jay bends down and hammers tent pegs into the ground , headlamp still firmly in place . [He]158-jay ’s muddy and sopping wet . [I]0-i get the uncontrollable giggles once more , and unable to help it , [I]0-i grab [my]0-i phone and take some photos of [him]158-jay . Surely one day [he]158-jay ’ll find this funny . After ten minutes , [he]158-jay comes back in . [He]158-jay ’s panting , wet , and covered in mud from the splashing of the rain . [I]0-i grab a towel and begin to dry [his]158-jay hair . [I]0-i peel [his]158-jay shirt off [him]158-jay and slide down [his]158-jay track pants . “ Just get dry . It ’s going to stop soon , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say to try to calm [him]158-jay . The sound of the rain is deafening above [us]2030-we , and [he]158-jay dries [himself]158-jay . [I]0-i shuffle through [his]158-jay bag and find [him]158-jay some dry clothes , and [the tent]4214-the tent begins to sway again as [he]158-jay hops around half - wet , trying to get dressed . [The tent]4214-the tent lifts again . “ Get fucked , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay snaps . Oh my God — this really is horrendous . [We]2030-we hear a loud rip in the roof , and [our]2030-we eyes widen . “ Oh no . . . [the tent]4214-the tent , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [We]2030-we ca n’t damage [the tent]4214-the tent — it ’s [Michael]96-michael ’s . ”[0-i] “ [I]158-jay ’ll buy [the poor prick]4260-the poor prick [a camper]4261-a camper . This is fucking intolerable , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay splutters . Rip . [The tent]4214-the tent rips in half . “ Ah , ”[0-i] [I]0-i scream as [our]2030-we things go flying everywhere in the wind . [I]0-i scurry to the ground as [I]0-i try to throw everything into bags . Some kind of sanity rubber band breaks inside [him]158-jay , and [he]158-jay puts [his]158-jay hands on [his]158-jay hips , tips [his]158-jay head back to the sky , and bursts out laughing . “ This is n’t funny . Get [our]2030-we bags to [the truck]1970-the truck , ”[0-i] [I]0-i cry . [He]158-jay laughs . . . and laughs . . . and laughs . [I]0-i scramble to keep [our]2030-we phones dry and run to [the truck]1970-the truck with [our]2030-we bags . “ [Jameson]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i yell . “ Do something . ”[0-i] [He]158-jay turns to [me]0-i and takes [me]0-i in [his]158-jay arms in the pouring rain and kisses [me]0-i . [Our]2030-we headlamps hit together , and [I]0-i laugh too . “ This is ridiculous , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [Hotel]4263-hotel ? ”[0-i] “ Please . ”[2037-the woman behind the desk] “ Hello . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile at [the receptionist of [the tourist center]2036-the tourist center]2035-the receptionist of the tourist center . “ Have [you]0-i got any B and Bs available for two nights , please ? ”[0-i] [The woman behind the desk]2037-the woman behind the desk types away . [We]2030-we stayed in [a hideous hotel]2038-a hideous hotel last night , and [Jameson]126-jameson refuses to stay [there]3073-there again . [He]126-jameson said [we]2030-we can only stay the full weekend if [I]0-i find somewhere half - decent for the next two nights . [He]126-jameson ’s chasing coffee outside for [us]2030-we . The rain is gone , and at some stage [we]2030-we have to go back and pick up the camping stuff from the Armageddon storm last night . [We]2030-we just got [our]2030-we things and left . There was nothing [we]2030-we could do in the middle of the night in those conditions anyway . “ [I]2037-the woman behind the desk only have [a farmhouse]4264-a farmhouse . ”[2037-the woman behind the desk] [She]2037-the woman behind the desk types and then reads . “ [Arndell]50-arndell is [the property]4265-the property . ”[2037-the woman behind the desk] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i listen . “ [It]50-arndell ’s available for two nights , and [you]0-i can have that at a discounted rate if [you]0-i want . ”[2037-the woman behind the desk] [I]0-i smile . [I]0-i love that [she]2037-the woman behind the desk thinks [we]2030-we need a discount . “ Okay , that sounds good . Thank [you]2037-the woman behind the desk . ”[0-i] [I]0-i slide over [Jameson]126-jameson ’s credit card , and [she]2037-the woman behind the desk does the paperwork . “ Here are the keys . ”[2037-the woman behind the desk] [She]2037-the woman behind the desk hands [me]0-i a map . “ Go down to [Falls Road]51-falls road , and then [the property]4265-the property has [[its]4265-the property own road]4267-its own road in on the right . ”[2037-the woman behind the desk] “ Oh , how big is it ? ”[2037-the woman behind the desk] “ [The house]3072-the house is on [three hundred acres]4269-three hundred acres . [The land]4270-the land is gorgeous . [The house]3072-the house is a little tired , but the location is stunning . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ Cool , okay . ”[0-i] [I]0-i bounce out to [the pickup]1956-the pickup to see [[my]0-i poor disheveled man]2041-my poor disheveled man . [He]2041-my poor disheveled man looks like [he]2041-my poor disheveled man ’s been to hell and back , and funnily enough , [I]0-i think it ’s the most relaxed [I]0-i ’ve ever seen [him]2041-my poor disheveled man . It ’s as if that sanity rubber band that broke in [him]2041-my poor disheveled man last night released some of [his]2041-my poor disheveled man tension . “ Okay , [we]4272-we got [a farmhouse]4264-a farmhouse . ”[2041-my poor disheveled man] [He]2041-my poor disheveled man reaches over and puts [his]2041-my poor disheveled man hand on [my]0-i thigh and hands [me]0-i [my]0-i coffee . [He]2041-my poor disheveled man shifts the gears on the steering wheel and pulls out . [I]0-i smile out the window as [I]0-i ride in [the bumpy truck]2042-the bumpy truck . “ Do [you]0-i know [we]2044-we have n’t passed [a car]1671-a car ? ”[2041-my poor disheveled man] [he]2041-my poor disheveled man says as [he]2041-my poor disheveled man keeps [his]2041-my poor disheveled man eyes on [the road]638-the road . “ [It]1671-a car ’s nice , is n’t it ? ”[2041-my poor disheveled man] [He]2041-my poor disheveled man shrugs . “ Different . ”[2041-my poor disheveled man] [We]2044-we follow the directions , and ten minutes later [we]2044-we get to a big stone entryway with the sign . ARNDELL “ This is it . ”[2044-we] [We]2044-we turn up [the driveway]1971-the driveway , and [I]0-i smile . [The road]638-the road is lined with huge trees that create a canopy . Rolling green hills are as far as [you]2047-you can see . “ Oh , look at [this place]459-this place . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile in wonder . “ [She]4276-she said [the land]4270-the land was beautiful . ”[0-i] For five minutes , [we]2044-we drive through until [we]2044-we get to the top of a hill and find [a big old house]2048-a big old house . [It]2048-a big old house ’s white with a sweeping veranda around the edge . The roof is made of shingles , and it must be a hundred years old . [Jameson]126-jameson ’s eyes find [me]0-i . “ Do n’t say anything . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk . [He]126-jameson holds [his]126-jameson hands up in the air as if crying defeat . [We]2044-we climb out and open the front door and peer in . [I]0-i smile broadly . Wide - timber floors , a huge fireplace , and great big windows with views out over [the property]4265-the property . [You]2047-you can see for miles from up here . The furniture is dated , but that does n’t matter to [us]2044-we . [I]0-i take [Jay]158-jay ’s hand as [we]2044-we walk through and look around . [A large living area]2050-a large living area , [a formal dining room]2051-a formal dining room , [a big kitchen]2052-a big kitchen , [a bathroom]4219-a bathroom , and [a bedroom]2054-a bedroom are [downstairs]3304-downstairs . There ’s an old timber staircase , and [we]2044-we go up to find [five bedrooms]2056-five bedrooms and [another bathroom]2057-another bathroom . [I]0-i turn to [Jameson]126-jameson and wrap [my]0-i arms around [his]126-jameson neck . “ Is this better , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles as [he]126-jameson bends to kiss [me]0-i . “ This will do . ”[126-jameson] [We]2044-we lie on a blanket in the grass , and the sun is warm on [our]2044-we faces . It ’s Sunday afternoon , and [we]2044-we are in a sleepy haze . Last night was heaven . [We]2044-we lit the fire , and [Jay]158-jay humored [me]0-i and helped [me]0-i carry the mattress out so that [we]2044-we could sleep next to it . Today [we]2044-we have explored [the property]4265-the property and went into [town]3306-town to grab some groceries in [[our]2044-we light - blue pickup truck]2060-our light - blue pickup truck . [Jameson]126-jameson is relaxed for the first time since [we]2044-we met . [I]0-i ’m happy . . . so happy . [I]0-i roll to face [him]126-jameson . “ Tell [me]0-i about [your]126-jameson relationship with [Claudia]122-claudia . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson frowns and rolls to [his]126-jameson side toward [me]0-i . “ What do [you]0-i want to know ? ”[126-jameson] “ Everything . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson reaches up and brushes [his]126-jameson finger over [my]0-i bottom lip . “ It was n’t like what [we]2044-we have . ”[126-jameson] “ How so ? ”[126-jameson] “ Well , [we]2044-we were [friends]3684-friends for a long time . There was never this instant attraction or . . . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson voice trails off . “ No , go on , ”[0-i] [I]0-i urge . “ [I]0-i want to know . ”[0-i] “ [She]122-claudia did some stories for [us]2044-we , and [we]2044-we got to know [each other]351-each other . Then . . . over time [we]2044-we built a friendship . ”[0-i] [I]0-i watch [him]126-jameson . “ [I]0-i thought . . . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson hesitates and plays with the blanket underneath [him]126-jameson as [he]126-jameson thinks for a moment . “ [You]0-i thought what ? ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson thought [she]122-claudia was the love of [my]126-jameson life . [She]122-claudia was like [me]126-jameson . Driven . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson shrugs . “ [She]122-claudia got [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [My]0-i stomach twists in jealousy . “ [We]4280-we were together for three years . Engaged . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ [You]0-i were engaged ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i did n’t know this . It was on [her]2061-her bio but not [his]126-jameson , and [I]0-i was hoping it was wrong . “ Yes . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes hold [his]126-jameson . “ What happened ? ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson exhales heavily . “ [She]122-claudia was offered the job as editor in chief for [British Vogue]19-british vogue . It was a huge thing , and [she]122-claudia had worked so hard to get it . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i watch [him]126-jameson as [he]126-jameson speaks . “ [She]122-claudia moved and . . . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson voice trails off . “ What ? ”[126-jameson] “ [We]4281-we tried the long - distance thing , and [I]0-i struggled with no sex . It ’s not who [I]0-i am . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ So [we]4281-we made a pact that [we]4281-we would be with [other people]3082-other people but try again in a few years . [We]4281-we had a five - year plan of getting back together . ”[0-i] [My]0-i heart sinks . [He]126-jameson still loves [her]2062-her . “ But then a year ago [I]0-i met [this girl]3375-this girl on [a plane]3123-a plane . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk . “ And [she]2062-her was everything that [I]0-i was n’t looking for . ”[0-i] [Our]2063-our eyes are locked , and the air crackles between [us]2063-our . “ But [I]126-jameson could n’t pursue [her]2062-her because of [my]126-jameson promise to [Claudia]122-claudia . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson takes [my]0-i face in [his]126-jameson hand , and [his]126-jameson thumb dusts back and forth over [my]0-i bottom lip . “ [I]126-jameson wanted to . [I]126-jameson desperately wanted to . [I]126-jameson felt a physical connection with [her]2062-her from the word go . [I]126-jameson was hard the entire plane trip , and [our]2063-our night together was insane . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles softly . “ There was something about [her]2062-her that [I]126-jameson could n’t forget . [She]2062-her lingered in the back of [my]126-jameson mind . [I]126-jameson compared all sex and [women]300-women with [her]2062-her since then . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson pauses as [he]126-jameson tries to articulate [his]126-jameson thoughts . “ [They]4286-they always fell short . . . even [Claudia]122-claudia . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smile as hope blooms in [my]0-i chest . “ Recently [I]126-jameson ’d been thinking about [her]2062-her a lot , and [I]126-jameson had even contacted [the airline]4287-the airline and found out [her]2062-her name . ”[126-jameson] “ [You]126-jameson had ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . This is news . [He]126-jameson nods . “ [I]126-jameson got a photocopy of [your]0-i passport emailed to [me]126-jameson just six weeks before [you]0-i started working for [us]4288-us . [I]126-jameson ’d planned on contacting [you]0-i , but with everything going on at work , [I]126-jameson had n’t got around to it yet . [I]126-jameson had no idea that [you]0-i were coming to work for [Miles Media]12-miles media . ”[126-jameson] “ That explains it , then . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk . “ Explains what ? ”[0-i] “ Why [you]126-jameson never called . [I]126-jameson look like [a prisoner in that photo]4289-a prisoner in that photo . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson chuckles . “ This is true . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson leans in and kisses [me]0-i softly . “ Tell [me]126-jameson about [your]0-i past loves . ”[126-jameson] [My]0-i eyes search [his]126-jameson . “ [I]126-jameson ca n’t . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson frowns . “ Since [I]126-jameson met [you]0-i , [I]126-jameson ’ve realized that [I]126-jameson ’ve never been in love before . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles softly . “ What about [the guy with [Backseat Barbie]100-backseat barbie]4290-the guy with backseat barbie ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i giggle . “ [You]126-jameson remember [him]4290-the guy with backseat barbie ? ”[0-i] “ Yes . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smirks as [he]126-jameson pulls [me]0-i over [his]126-jameson body and holds [me]0-i tight . “ What [I]126-jameson felt for [them]4291-them , [Jay]158-jay , and what [I]126-jameson feel for [you]0-i is incomparable . ”[126-jameson] [We]2064-we lie in silence for a while and stare up at the trees as they sway over [us]2064-we . “ [I]0-i love [you]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [He]126-jameson kisses [my]0-i temple . “ Good , because [I]126-jameson do n’t camp in hell for just [anyone]295-anyone . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i giggle as [I]0-i hug [him]126-jameson . [This man]327-this man kills [me]0-i . [Jameson]126-jameson [We]2064-we stare at the fire as it flickers . It sporadically cracks as the wood burns . [Emily]91-emily is in front of [me]0-i on [our]2064-we makeshift bed on the floor . [We]2064-we ’ve just made love and are in a sleepy , relaxed state . [Home]3076-home tomorrow . To be honest , [I]0-i could stay here with [her]91-emily forever . [She]91-emily makes anywhere [home]3076-home . [Emily]91-emily smiles up at [me]0-i . [Her]91-emily long dark hair is splayed across the pillow , and [her]91-emily big eyes offer [me]0-i a deep comfort . [My]0-i hand slides down over [her]91-emily full breast and lower over [her]91-emily stomach . [I]0-i turn [her]91-emily head and take [her]91-emily lips with [mine]0-i . [Our]2064-we tongues dance in a slow erotic dance . [I]0-i ’m so in love with [this woman]943-this woman . When [we]2064-we ’re alone , nothing else matters . “ Thank [you]91-emily , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [Her]91-emily eyes search [mine]0-i . “ For what ? ”[91-emily] “ For finding [me]91-emily . ”[91-emily] [She]91-emily rolls toward [me]0-i and takes [my]0-i face in [her]91-emily hands . “ [We]2064-we were always going to find [each other]351-each other , ”[91-emily] [she]91-emily whispers . “ [Soul mates]4294-soul mates do that . ”[91-emily] [I]0-i smirk as [I]0-i tuck a piece of [her]91-emily hair behind [her]91-emily ear . “ [You]0-i do n’t really buy into that soul mate mumbo jumbo thing , do [you]0-i ? ”[0-i] “ [I]91-emily did n’t . ”[91-emily] [She]91-emily kisses [me]0-i softly . “ Until [I]91-emily met [you]0-i . ”[91-emily] [We]2069-we stare at [each other]351-each other in the flickering light , and if [I]0-i could bottle this moment , [I]0-i would . Never have [I]0-i had something so raw and pure in [my]0-i life . [Her]91-emily love is a light . . . [my]0-i light . “ [Jay]158-jay , ”[91-emily] [she]91-emily murmurs as [she]91-emily runs [her]91-emily fingers through [my]0-i stubble . [Her]91-emily eyes search [mine]0-i . “ Yeah , [baby]3139-baby ? ”[91-emily] “ Can [we]4296-we come back here next weekend ? ”[91-emily] [she]91-emily asks hopefully . “ Really ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [She]91-emily nods with a soft smile . “ [I]91-emily love [this old house]4297-this old house . ”[91-emily] [I]0-i smirk . If the truth be known , [I]0-i ’m kind of keen on it [myself]0-i . “ Maybe . ”[91-emily] [She]91-emily snuggles against [my]0-i chest . [I]0-i feel [her]91-emily relax in [my]0-i arms , and after a while , the gentle pattern of [her]91-emily breathing notifies [me]0-i that [she]91-emily ’s drifted off to sleep . [I]0-i inhale deeply into [her]91-emily hair and smile as [I]0-i watch the fire . This is it . [I]0-i can stop searching . [I]0-i ’ve found [her]91-emily . Chapter 20 [Jameson]126-jameson [I]0-i walk into [the apartment]3531-the apartment right at seven to the delectable aroma of gourmet food cooking . [I]0-i smile , drop [my]0-i laptop bag , and make [my]0-i way to [the kitchen]818-the kitchen to find [Emily]91-emily dancing with [her]91-emily back to [me]0-i as [she]91-emily cooks . [I]0-i stand at the doorway and watch [her]91-emily for a moment . [She]91-emily ’s wearing a black skirt and a white shirt , [her]91-emily long dark hair is in a ponytail , and [her]91-emily naturally beautiful face is glowing . A warm feeling of comfort runs through [me]0-i at [her]91-emily obvious happiness . All is right in [my]0-i world when [she]91-emily ’s [here]275-here . This is the weirdest thing [I]0-i ’ve ever experienced . [I]0-i do n’t want to be anywhere but here with [her]91-emily . From three o’clock every afternoon [I]0-i start to watch the clock , waiting for the time [I]0-i get to come [home]3076-home . [I]0-i watch as [she]91-emily picks up [her]91-emily wineglass and sips it ; [her]91-emily burgundy lipstick marks the glass in a perfect lip shape , and [I]0-i smile — even [her]91-emily lipstick on the glass does things to [me]0-i . [I]0-i would never want to wash it again ; [I]0-i ’m like [a starstruck schoolboy]2075-a starstruck schoolboy . [Her]91-emily behind moves sexily to the beat , and [I]0-i watch [her]91-emily , transfixed by [the beautiful woman in [[my]0-i kitchen]2077-my kitchen]2076-the beautiful woman in my kitchen . [She]91-emily turns and catches sight of [me]0-i and smiles sexily . “ Hello . ”[91-emily] [She]91-emily comes to [me]0-i , and [I]0-i wrap [her]91-emily in [my]0-i arms . “ How ’s [[my]91-emily man]3820-my man ? ”[91-emily] [she]91-emily asks as [she]91-emily kisses [me]0-i softly . “ Good now that [I]91-emily ’m [home]3076-home . ”[91-emily] [Our]2078-we lips touch again and again , and [I]0-i sit [her]91-emily up on the counter and stand between [her]91-emily legs as [we]2078-we kiss . “ Are [we]2078-we having an entrée before [our]2078-we meal , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles ? ”[91-emily] [she]91-emily breathes against [my]0-i lips . [I]0-i unzip [my]0-i fly . “ Looks like it . ”[91-emily] It ’s Thursday and crazy around here . [We]2078-we are preparing reports for [our]2078-we board meetings tomorrow . It feels good to be back at [it]2079-it without the added pressure of all the other shit that ’s been going on around here . [Tristan]135-tristan and [I]0-i are at [my]0-i desk , discussing the new advertising budget [we]2078-we have set , when there ’s a knock on [my]0-i door . “ Come in , ”[0-i] [I]0-i call . The door opens , and [a familiar face]2080-a familiar face comes into view . [My]0-i face falls , and [I]0-i stand immediately . “ [Claudia]122-claudia . ”[0-i] [Tristan]135-tristan ’s eyes widen , and [he]135-tristan looks to [me]0-i as [he]135-tristan stands . “ Hi , [Claud]187-claud . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan rushes to [her]2081-her and kisses [her]2081-her on the cheek . “ How are [you]2081-her ? ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan asks . [She]2081-her forces a smile . “ Good , thank [you]135-tristan . . . and [you]135-tristan ? ”[2081-her] “ Great . ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan ’s eyes meet [mine]0-i across [the room]613-the room . “ [I]135-tristan have some things to do . See [you]2081-her later , [Claud]187-claud . ”[135-tristan] “ Goodbye . ”[2081-her] [Her]2081-her smile fades , and [her]2081-her nervous eyes come to [me]0-i . “ Hello , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[2081-her] “ Hello . ”[0-i] [I]0-i walk around and kiss [her]2081-her on the cheek ; [her]2081-her familiar perfume permeates around [me]0-i , and [I]0-i frown at the memories it evokes . “ How are [you]2081-her ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . [She]2081-her clutches [her]2081-her purse . “ [I]2081-her ’ve resigned from [Vogue]123-vogue . [I]2081-her ’m coming [home]3076-home to [New York]3-new york . ”[2081-her] [I]0-i stare at [her]2081-her , lost for words . “ [I]2081-her ’ve missed [you]0-i too much , [Jameson]126-jameson . [I]2081-her ca n’t live without [you]0-i , ”[2081-her] [she]2081-her whispers . [My]0-i heart drops . “ [Claud]187-claud , no . . . ”[2081-her] [Her]2081-her eyes fill with tears . “ [You]187-claud said it was distance . ”[2081-her] Empathy fills [me]0-i . [I]0-i ca n’t stand seeing [her]2081-her upset , and [I]0-i take [her]2081-her into [my]0-i arms . “ It ’s not the distance anymore , ”[0-i] [I]0-i murmur into [her]2081-her hair . The door opens , and [Emily]91-emily bounces in . [Her]91-emily face falls , and [she]91-emily stops on the spot when [she]91-emily sees [Claudia]122-claudia in [my]0-i arms . “ Oh . . . [I]91-emily ’m — ”[91-emily] “ Come in , [Emily]91-emily , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say . [Claudia]122-claudia pulls out of [my]0-i arms , and [her]122-claudia crazy eyes go to [Emily]91-emily . “ [Claudia]122-claudia , this is [Emily]91-emily . . . [[my]0-i girlfriend]4117-my girlfriend , ”[0-i] [I]0-i introduce [them]2083-them . [Emily]91-emily ’s eyes flick between [us]2084-us , and then [she]91-emily holds out [her]91-emily hand . “ Hello , [Claudia]122-claudia . Nice to meet [you]122-claudia . ”[91-emily] [She]91-emily smiles kindly . [Claudia]122-claudia shakes [her]122-claudia hand . “ Hello . ”[91-emily] [She]91-emily turns [her]91-emily attention back to [me]0-i . [Emily]91-emily looks between [us]2084-us again . “ [I]91-emily ’ll give [you]122-claudia some privacy . ”[91-emily] “ Thank [you]91-emily , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [my]0-i eyes stay fixed firmly on [Claudia]122-claudia . [I]0-i hate hurting [her]122-claudia . “ Goodbye , ”[91-emily] [Emily]91-emily says . “ Nice to meet [you]0-i . ”[91-emily] [Claudia]122-claudia ’s eyes fill with tears anew as the door quietly clicks closed . “ Does [she]122-claudia even know who [I]122-claudia am ? ”[122-claudia] [she]122-claudia whispers . “ Yes . ”[122-claudia] “ And [she]122-claudia found [me]122-claudia in [your]0-i arms and is happy to leave [you]0-i here with [me]122-claudia ? ”[122-claudia] [she]122-claudia mutters sarcastically . [My]0-i eyes hold [hers]122-claudia , annoyed that [she]122-claudia thinks [Emily]91-emily has reason to be insecure . “ [She]122-claudia knows where [my]122-claudia heart lies . ”[122-claudia] [Claudia]122-claudia ’s eyes fill with tears , and [I]0-i internally kick [myself]0-i for being [an ass]2085-an ass . “ [I]0-i ’m coming [home]3076-home to [New York]3-new york , [Jameson]126-jameson . [We]4303-we can get back together . ”[0-i] “ No , [we]4303-we ca n’t . ”[122-claudia] [Her]122-claudia eyes search [mine]0-i . “ [I]122-claudia ’m marrying [her]122-claudia , [Claud]187-claud . ”[122-claudia] “ Do n’t say that , ”[122-claudia] [she]122-claudia whispers . “ [She]122-claudia ’s just easy for [you]187-claud because [she]122-claudia ’s no challenge . ”[122-claudia] “ [You]187-claud ’re wrong ; [she]122-claudia ’s [the love of [my]122-claudia life]1633-the love of my life . ”[122-claudia] [She]122-claudia clenches [her]122-claudia jaw in anger . “ [[You]187-claud bastard]4305-you bastard . ”[122-claudia] “ [I]0-i ’m sorry . ”[0-i] [I]0-i step back from [her]122-claudia . “ But there ’s no other way to put it . ”[0-i] [Her]122-claudia anger erupts . “ So . . . what happens when [I]122-claudia see [you]187-claud out ? ”[122-claudia] [she]122-claudia snaps . “ [You]187-claud say hello . ”[122-claudia] “ Do [you]187-claud think [you]187-claud can replace [me]122-claudia so easily ? ”[122-claudia] [she]122-claudia stammers . [I]0-i stare at [her]122-claudia , sad that [she]122-claudia ’s hurting . “ [I]122-claudia love [you]187-claud , [Jameson]126-jameson . Come back to [me]122-claudia , ”[122-claudia] [she]122-claudia pleads as [she]122-claudia takes [my]0-i hand in [hers]122-claudia . “ [You]187-claud need to go , [Claud]187-claud . ”[122-claudia] “ [You]187-claud ’re kicking [me]122-claudia out ? ”[122-claudia] [she]122-claudia shrieks . “ No . [I]122-claudia ’m asking [you]187-claud to leave . ”[122-claudia] “ That ’s the same thing . ”[0-i] [I]0-i exhale heavily ; this is n’t going to end well . [I]0-i need to end it before an all - out war begins . [I]0-i kiss [her]122-claudia on the forehead and walk to the door and open it . “ Goodbye , [Claudia]122-claudia . ”[122-claudia] [She]122-claudia angrily swipes the tears from [her]122-claudia eyes and storms past [me]0-i . [I]0-i close the door and stare at the carpet for a moment as [I]0-i feel the tectonic plates move another notch closer to goal . [I]0-i go back to [my]0-i desk and dial [Emily]91-emily ’s number . “ Hi , ”[91-emily] [she]91-emily answers . “ Hi . ”[91-emily] “ [I]0-i came up to see if [you]91-emily wanted to go out to lunch today . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile softly . [I]0-i love [this woman]943-this woman — not an inch of insecurity . “ [I]91-emily do . Meet [you]91-emily in [the foyer]799-the foyer at one . ”[91-emily] [Emily]91-emily It ’s just around three in the afternoon . [I]0-i turn to [Aaron]110-aaron . “ Wish that damn cheesecake [Uber]173-uber eats would show up about now . ”[0-i] “ Ha , right ? ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron mutters . “ [I]110-aaron ’ll go make the coffees . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i stand and make [my]0-i way to [the kitchen]818-the kitchen . [I]0-i make [Aaron]110-aaron ’s and then [Molly]111-molly ’s , and then as [I]0-i ’m making [mine]0-i , [Jake]158-jay walks into [the kitchen]818-the kitchen . “ Hi , [Emily]91-emily . ”[158-jay] “ Oh , hi . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stir the coffee . “ Holy shit , get ready for a media storm tomorrow . ”[0-i] “ Why ? ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay looks around and leans in as if not wanting [anyone]295-anyone to hear what [he]158-jay has to say . “ [You]0-i should see what [Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara is putting to print tomorrow . ”[158-jay] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ [You]0-i ca n’t tell [anyone]295-anyone , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay whispers . “ [I]158-jay would n’t . ”[158-jay] “ [They]4308-they have new dirt on [Jameson Miles]126-jameson . The shit is about to hit the fan . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes widen . “ What ? How do [you]158-jay know ? ”[0-i] “ [[Our]2092-our insider]4309-our insider in [[their]4308-they office]4310-their office has just called it through . ”[158-jay] “ What is it ? ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay looks around . “ Apparently — ”[158-jay] [Someone else]1023-someone else walks into [the kitchen]818-the kitchen , and [we]2092-our both step back from [each other]351-each other guiltily . [The guy]3334-the guy begins to make idle chitchat with [Jake]158-jay , and if [I]0-i wait around , it will be too obvious that [I]0-i am waiting to talk to [him]158-jay alone . Shit , [I]0-i ’ll come back in a minute . [I]0-i make [my]0-i way back to [my]0-i desk with [my]0-i heart in [my]0-i throat . What dirt do [they]2095-they have on [Jay]158-jay ? Oh hell , [I]0-i need to find out what it is . [I]0-i keep an eye on [the kitchen]818-the kitchen , and as soon as [I]0-i see [Jake]158-jay go back to [his]158-jay desk , [I]0-i make [my]0-i way over to [him]158-jay , and [his]158-jay eyes light up when [he]158-jay sees [me]0-i . “ Hi . ”[158-jay] “ Meet [me]0-i in [the photocopy room]4311-the photocopy room , please ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Sure . ”[0-i] [I]0-i walk in and wait , and moments later [he]158-jay follows [me]0-i in . “ What the hell is going on ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [I]158-jay ca n’t tell [you]0-i here ; it ’s too risky , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay says as [he]158-jay looks around . “ Just tell [me]158-jay , ”[158-jay] [I]0-i almost beg . “ Meet [me]158-jay after work , and [I]158-jay ’ll tell [you]158-jay everything over a quick drink . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i stare at [him]158-jay . “ What time ? ”[0-i] “ Six thirty ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i think for a moment . That would still give [me]0-i time to go to [Tristan]135-tristan if [I]0-i need to . “ Just tell [me]0-i now . ”[0-i] “ No way . [I]196-gabriel ferrara ’ll tell [you]158-jay it all tonight ; it ’s too in depth . ”[196-gabriel ferrara] Damn it , [I]0-i do n’t want to meet [this idiot]2097-this idiot , but if [I]0-i do n’t , how would [I]0-i know what [Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara is up to ? If [I]0-i find out , then maybe [we]2098-we can get an injunction and stop the story from going to print . “ Okay , fine . Where ? ”[2098-we] “ [[Harry]205-harry ’s Bar]4312-harry ’s bar , six thirty . ”[2099-they] “ Okay , see [you]158-jay there . ”[0-i] [I]0-i go back to [my]0-i desk and look around guiltily . [My]0-i heart rate is going through the roof . What dirt do [they]2099-they have on [Jameson]126-jameson ? Oh no , [[my]0-i poor man]2100-my poor man . [Molly]111-molly and [Aaron]110-aaron are both not at [their]2099-they desks , and [I]0-i know [I]0-i have to ring [Jay]158-jay and let [him]158-jay know [I]0-i ’m going to be late when [they]2099-they ca n’t hear [me]0-i lie and use [them]2099-they as [my]0-i alibi . [I]0-i nervously dial [his]158-jay number . “ Hi , ”[158-jay] [his]158-jay sexy voice purrs down the phone . “ Hi . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i begin to break into a sweat as [I]0-i prepare to lie . “ [I]158-jay ’m going to go out to dinner with [Molly]111-molly and [Aaron]110-aaron tonight . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i screw up [my]0-i face . “ [Aaron]110-aaron is a bit down , and [we]4313-we ’re going to try and cheer [him]110-aaron up . ”[0-i] “ Oh . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay seems surprised . “ Is that okay ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply nervously . “ Of course it is . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i ’ll come over as soon as [I]0-i finish , and it wo n’t be late . ”[0-i] “ Okay , [babe]3279-babe . ”[0-i] “ What will [you]158-jay eat ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . [I]0-i hate that [I]0-i wo n’t be cooking for [him]158-jay . Looking after [Jameson]126-jameson has become [my]0-i favorite thing . “ [I]158-jay ’ll find something ; do n’t worry about [me]158-jay . ”[158-jay] “ Oh , okay . ”[0-i] [I]0-i fall silent , feeling guilty . As if sensing [my]0-i inner turmoil , [he]158-jay asks , “ Is everything all right , [Emily]91-emily ? ”[158-jay] “ Yes , of course . [I]158-jay love [you]91-emily . See [you]91-emily tonight . ”[158-jay] [I]0-i hang up in a rush before [I]0-i confess [my]0-i lie . Six thirty on the dot [I]0-i walk into [[Harry]205-harry ’s Bar]4312-harry ’s bar . [I]0-i ’ve been [here]275-here before with [Aaron]110-aaron and [Molly]111-molly , so [I]0-i know where it is . [Jake]158-jay is in the back corner , and [he]158-jay waves happily when [he]158-jay sees [me]0-i . [I]0-i smile awkwardly and make [my]0-i way over to the table . A glass of wine sits there waiting for [me]0-i . “ Hi . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sit down opposite [him]158-jay . “ Hi . [You]0-i look beautiful . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay smiles as [he]158-jay looks [me]0-i up and down . [I]0-i frown . [I]0-i went [home]3076-home and showered and changed quickly . [I]0-i hope [he]158-jay does n’t think it was for [him]158-jay . [I]0-i changed for [Jay]158-jay for when [I]0-i see [him]158-jay later . “ [You]158-jay ordered [me]0-i a drink ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Yes . ”[0-i] [He]158-jay smiles warmly . “ [I]158-jay hope [you]0-i like it — cab sav . ”[158-jay] “ Thanks . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sip it . “ What ’s the story about [Jameson]126-jameson ? ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay opens the menu . “ Should [we]4315-we get something to eat ? ”[158-jay] “ [I]0-i ’m really not hungry , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply . [I]0-i just want to get the information and get the hell out of here . [He]158-jay keeps reading the menu . “ [I]158-jay might get some wedges . ”[158-jay] “ Tell [me]0-i what [you]158-jay know , ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask again . “ Well , it ’s a tangled web . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sip [my]0-i wine as [I]0-i watch [him]158-jay . [I]0-i ’m so nervous about what [he]158-jay ’s about to tell [me]0-i that [I]0-i feel sick . “ Apparently there is a huge story coming out tomorrow . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sip [my]0-i wine . “ About ? ”[0-i] “ Well . . . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay pauses . “ [I]158-jay think [I]158-jay ’m going to get the wedges ; do [you]0-i want wedges ? ”[158-jay] “ Fine , get the wedges , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . [He]158-jay keeps looking at the menu , and [I]0-i ’m about to explode . Pick some food , [[you]2104-you damn fool]2105-you damn fool . “ [I]0-i ’ll get the wedges , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say as [I]0-i stand in a rush . “ Is that it ? Is that all [you]158-jay want ? ”[0-i] “ Uh - huh . ”[0-i] [I]0-i march to the counter . “ Can [I]0-i have a bowl of wedges and a trio of dipping sauces , please ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i exhale heavily as [I]0-i try to calm [myself]0-i down . Just be calm . “ [Emily]91-emily . ”[0-i] [I]0-i hear a voice behind [me]0-i . “ Is that all ? ”[867-the waiter] [the waiter]867-the waiter asks [me]0-i . “ Yes , please . ”[867-the waiter] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i turn back toward the voice that just called [me]0-i . [Jake]158-jay grabs [my]0-i hand and kisses [me]0-i on the lips . [I]0-i step back , shocked . “ What are [you]158-jay doing ? ”[158-jay] “ Kissing [you]0-i . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay smiles as [he]158-jay leans in to kiss [me]0-i again . [I]0-i jump back and out of [his]158-jay reach . “ What the hell , [Jake]158-jay ? [I]0-i do n’t like [you]158-jay like that , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap as [I]0-i wipe [my]0-i mouth . “ [I]0-i thought that since [we]4316-we were on a date . . . ”[0-i] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer , horrified . “ [I]0-i came here to find out about [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[0-i] [He]158-jay smiles a broad , cheeky smile and then winks . [I]0-i glare at [him]158-jay . “ There ’s no breaking story , is there ? ”[0-i] [He]158-jay shrugs . “ [We]4316-we could make the story about the wild night [we]4316-we spend together . ”[158-jay] “ [You]158-jay ’re [a fucking idiot]4317-a fucking idiot , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ [I]0-i am not interested in [you]158-jay . ”[0-i] “ Oh , but [you]158-jay should be . ”[158-jay] [He]158-jay grabs [my]0-i hand again , and [I]0-i push [him]158-jay hard in the chest . “ Stop it . ”[158-jay] “ That will be twenty - two dollars , ”[2107-the poor waiter] [the poor waiter]2107-the poor waiter says as [he]2107-the poor waiter looks between [us]2108-us . “ [I]0-i ’m not paying for this imbecile ’s wedges , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ Goodbye , [Jake]158-jay , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say as [I]0-i storm toward the door . “ [Emily]91-emily . . . come on . [We]2108-us would be great together , ”[158-jay] [he]158-jay calls . [I]0-i stumble out of [the bar]534-the bar , furious , as steam shoots from [my]0-i ears . [I]0-i ’ve been stressed out all day , and for what ? [Stupid Jake]158-jay ’s lie to get [me]0-i on [my]0-i own . [The guy]3334-the guy ’s a fucking sleazebag . And now [I]0-i ca n’t even go [home]3076-home because [I]0-i lied to [Jay]158-jay about where [I]0-i am . [I]0-i walk into [a Thai restaurant]2112-a thai restaurant , and [the waiter]867-the waiter approaches [me]0-i . “ Can [I]867-the waiter have a table for one , please ? ”[867-the waiter] [I]0-i ask sadly . [I]0-i ’ll just eat dinner alone and then go [home]3076-home to [[my]0-i man]3820-my man . [I]0-i ca n’t believe [I]0-i fell for that trick . What [an asshole]785-an asshole . At least there ’s no story . [Jameson]126-jameson [I]0-i bend and kiss [Emily]91-emily on the forehead in the dark . [She]91-emily ’s still sleeping . “ [I]91-emily ’m going , [babe]3279-babe . ”[91-emily] “ Hmm . ”[91-emily] [She]91-emily wraps [her]91-emily arms around [me]0-i and pulls [me]0-i down on top of [her]91-emily . “ No , do n’t go . Play hooky today . ”[91-emily] [I]0-i smile in [her]91-emily arms . “ [I]0-i ca n’t ; [I]0-i have a meeting this morning . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh . [I]0-i have so much damage control to do . Even though the immediate story - leak threat has come to an end , this battle with [Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara is nowhere near over . If anything , [I]0-i feel it ’s about to come to a head . “ Two days until [we]2117-we go away , ”[0-i] [I]0-i remind [her]91-emily . [She]91-emily smiles with [her]91-emily eyes closed . “ Two days is too long , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles . One of these days [I]91-emily ’m going to kidnap [you]114-mr. miles . ”[91-emily] [We]2117-we kiss softly , again and again , and [I]0-i can feel [my]0-i arousal grow between [my]0-i legs . [I]0-i pull back from [her]91-emily . “ [I]0-i ’ve got to go , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper into [her]91-emily hair . “ If [I]0-i stay [here]275-here , [I]0-i ’m going to fuck [you]91-emily and be late . ”[0-i] “ Good . ”[91-emily] [She]91-emily smirks . “ Fuck [me]91-emily and be late . ”[91-emily] [I]0-i chuckle against [her]91-emily lips , and with one long , last , lingering kiss , [I]0-i get up and stare at [her]91-emily lying in [my]0-i bed , which is all messed up . [She]91-emily smiles up at [me]0-i , and [my]0-i heart constricts . Nothing has ever looked so perfect . . . or felt so right . Even with all this shit going on , [Emily]91-emily instills in [me]0-i a sense of calm , as if the whole world is still all right because [we]2118-we have [each other]351-each other . “ [I]91-emily love [you]0-i . ”[91-emily] “ [I]91-emily love [you]0-i more . ”[91-emily] [She]91-emily smiles as [she]91-emily sits up and makes a last - minute attempt to drag [me]0-i back to bed . It ’s so fucking hard to leave when [she]91-emily ’s like this . [I]0-i make [my]0-i way [downstairs]3304-downstairs and see [[my]0-i trusty friend]2121-my trusty friend [Alan]152-alan standing beside [the car]422-the car . “ Morning . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . [He]152-alan gives [me]0-i a sad smile , and [I]0-i frown . “ Everything all right ? ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan opens the door of [the limo]811-the limo , and [Tristan]135-tristan , [Christopher]156-christopher , and [Elliot]155-elliot are in the back , waiting for [me]0-i . [I]0-i frown . “ Hi . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes flick to [Alan]152-alan in question . “ What ’s going on ? ”[0-i] “ Get in . ”[155-elliot] [Elliot]155-elliot sighs . [I]0-i glance between [them]2124-them ; [their]2124-them faces are solemn , and [I]0-i know something has happened . “ Is [dad]4320-dad all right ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [Dad]192-dad ’s fine . ”[0-i] “ [Mom]105-mom ? ”[2124-them] “ [She]105-mom ’s great . Get in . ”[0-i] [I]0-i get in and close the door , and [the limo]811-the limo pulls out into the traffic . “ [I]135-tristan want [you]0-i to know that [we]4321-we do n’t believe anything about this , and [we]4321-we are simply here for [you]0-i , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan says . “ What ’s going on ? ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i snap as agitation washes over [me]0-i . [Elliot]155-elliot hands [me]0-i the paper . [I]0-i stare at it for a moment , and it takes a few seconds for [my]0-i brain to process what [I]0-i ’m seeing . The front page of the Gazette is a huge image of [Emily]91-emily kissing [Jake the investigator]158-jay . [She]91-emily ’s holding [his]158-jay hand and smiling as [his]158-jay lips press to [hers]91-emily . It looks as though it ’s in [a restaurant]927-a restaurant or something . [I]0-i frown as [my]0-i chest tightens . “ What the fuck is this ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap angrily as [I]0-i flick the paper . [I]0-i scan the story . [Jameson Miles]126-jameson — Media Guru ’s Fall from [Grace]148-grace In what appears to be the final nail in [[Jameson Miles]126-jameson ’s media coffin]2127-jameson miles ’s media coffin , [[his]126-jameson fiancée]2128-his fiancée , [Emily Foster]91-emily , has been having a secret affair . [The two]2129-the two have been spotted in various locations and were snapped holidaying in [Italy]55-italy two months ago . Leaked bank statements released today prove that [Jameson Miles]126-jameson has been embezzling money and transferring it to an offshore account . [The board]2130-the board is expected to fire [him]126-jameson as [CEO of [Miles Media]12-miles media]2131-ceo of miles media today , and criminal charges will be laid . Looks like [Emily Foster]91-emily jumped [ship]2132-ship just in time . Chapter 21 [I]0-i look up to [[my]0-i brothers]3514-my brothers , speechless . [I]0-i stare back down at the photo of [Emily]91-emily . [She]91-emily ’s wearing [her]91-emily yellow dress . . . the same one [she]91-emily was wearing yesterday . [My]0-i eyebrows rise by [themselves]3514-my brothers as [I]0-i try to make sense of this . “ When was this taken ? ”[0-i] “ No idea , but it had to be lately . [She]91-emily has the bracelet on that [you]0-i bought [her]91-emily . ”[0-i] [I]0-i glance down to [her]91-emily arm , and sure enough , the diamond - and - gold bracelet is on [her]91-emily arm . Can it be ? [I]0-i frown — a clusterfuck of questions . . . not [[my]0-i [Emily]91-emily]2134-my emily , no . “ [We]4322-we know it ’s not [you]0-i , ”[155-elliot] [Elliot]155-elliot says . “ [You]0-i ’ve been hacked ; [we]4322-we will prove it . [I]155-elliot promise [you]0-i . ”[155-elliot] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown , unable to string a sentence together . [I]0-i drag [my]0-i eyes up to [[my]0-i brothers]3514-my brothers in confusion . “ There ’ve been transfers , [Jameson]126-jameson . Millions of dollars have left [our]4322-we bank accounts with [your]0-i password , ”[0-i] [Christopher]156-christopher says solemnly . [I]0-i narrow [my]0-i eyes . “ What are [you]156-christopher talking about ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [I]0-i do n’t understand . ”[0-i] [I]0-i glance back down at the image . “ When was this photo taken ? ”[0-i] “ This is a setup ; [I]135-tristan ’m sure of it , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan snaps . “ [Emily]91-emily would n’t do this . ”[135-tristan] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown , unable to believe what [I]0-i ’m hearing . [I]0-i run [my]0-i two hands through [my]0-i hair as [I]0-i begin to perspire ; adrenaline rushes through [my]0-i bloodstream . “ That ’s bullshit , and [you]0-i know it , ”[155-elliot] [Elliot]155-elliot snaps . “ The timing of this image going to print is no coincidence . ”[155-elliot] [I]0-i frown as [my]0-i eyes come to [Elliot]155-elliot . “ Has [Emily]91-emily been in [[your]0-i apartment]3695-your apartment alone ? ”[155-elliot] [he]155-elliot asks . [I]0-i stare at [him]155-elliot , [my]0-i mind a clusterfuck of confusion . “ Has [she]91-emily had access to [your]0-i computers , [Jameson]126-jameson ? ”[156-christopher] [Christopher]156-christopher snaps . [I]0-i screw [my]0-i face up . “ Yes . . . but . . . ”[0-i] [They]2136-they all sit back in [their]2136-they seats as if collectively coming to a conclusion . [I]0-i look between [them]2136-they . “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [I]0-i think [Emily]91-emily ’s working with [Gabriel Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara . It ’s all a little bit too coincidental , if [you]4324-you ask [me]0-i . [She]91-emily ’s been sent in to keep [you]0-i occupied while [he]196-gabriel ferrara planned [your]0-i demise . ”[0-i] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ That ’s preposterous . ”[0-i] “ Yes , it is , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan agrees . “ Fucking ridiculous . ”[135-tristan] “ Think about it , ”[155-elliot] [Elliot]155-elliot snaps . “ [She]91-emily conveniently shows up here and , within weeks , has [you]0-i by the balls . ”[155-elliot] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i screw up [my]0-i face . “ Fucking bullshit . ”[0-i] [I]0-i reread the story as fury rages inside of [me]0-i like never before . [Elliot]155-elliot hits the paper with the back of [his]155-elliot hand . “ What ’s this fucking photo , then ? ”[155-elliot] “ A setup , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan snaps . [I]0-i stare at the image ; [she]2137-she ’s holding [Jake]158-jay ’s hand and smiling as [he]158-jay kisses [her]2137-she . . . it looks like [she]2137-she ’s happy to be there . [My]0-i eyes flick to [Tristan]135-tristan in question . [I]0-i have no idea what to think . . . what the actual fuck is going on here ? “ [I]135-tristan ’m telling [you]0-i , [man]3269-man , it ’s a camera angle ; [you]0-i know better than [anyone]295-anyone that the right angle can tell a completely different story , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan says . “ Bullshit . Where there ’s smoke there ’s always fire , ”[155-elliot] [Elliot]155-elliot growls . “ Nevertheless , [Emily Foster]91-emily is fucking irrelevant right now . Deal with [her]91-emily later . [You]0-i ’re being accused of embezzlement . [You]0-i could go to [jail]1376-jail , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[155-elliot] [I]0-i run both of [my]0-i hands through [my]0-i hair as [I]0-i bring [my]0-i focus back to the facts . [I]0-i feel a surge of adrenaline rush throughout [my]0-i body as [my]0-i skin prickles . “ What ’s happened ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . [I]0-i can hear [my]0-i angry heartbeat in [my]0-i ears . “ [We]4328-we ’re not sure . Huge bank transfers have been coming out of the accounts , and [nobody]3121-nobody noticed , ”[156-christopher] [Christopher]156-christopher replies . “ Going to where ? ”[156-christopher] [I]0-i frown . “ An offshore account . ”[0-i] “ How the fuck am [I]0-i implicated in all of this ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i glance back down at the image of [Emily]91-emily kissing [Jake]158-jay , and [I]0-i want to kill [somebody]271-somebody . . . [Gabriel Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara . “ [I]196-gabriel ferrara do n’t understand . ”[196-gabriel ferrara] [I]0-i drag [my]0-i eyes to [[my]0-i brother]2139-my brother to try and focus on the facts . “ It ’s coming up that the transfers were made from [your]2139-my brother log - in details . ”[0-i] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i screw up [my]0-i face in question . “ That ’s impossible ; [I]0-i have n’t been into [our]4330-us business accounts for months . [I]0-i have no reason to . ”[0-i] “ That ’s what [I]135-tristan said , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan snaps . “ [I]135-tristan handle the money side of things ; [you]2139-my brother all know that . ”[135-tristan] “ [We]4330-us have the accounts and legal team meeting [us]4330-us at [the office]444-the office at eight , ”[155-elliot] [Elliot]155-elliot replies . [My]0-i eyes flick to [him]2139-my brother . “ Does [Dad]192-dad know ? ”[0-i] “ Yeah . ”[2139-my brother] [He]2139-my brother exhales heavily . “ [He]192-dad ’s meeting [us]4330-us [there]3073-there . ”[2139-my brother] [I]0-i clench [my]0-i jaw and stare out the window as [we]2140-we fly through [the streets of [New York]3-new york]2141-the streets of new york . Anger , confusion , and betrayal are all that [I]0-i see . [I]0-i drag [my]0-i hand down [my]0-i face and inhale deeply as [I]0-i try to slow [my]0-i heart rate down . [I]0-i feel crazier than ever before . [My]0-i reputation . . . [my]0-i business . [[My]0-i girl]3996-my girl . [I]0-i stare out the window , and moments later [we]2140-we arrive at [the Miles Media building]624-the miles media building . [It]624-the miles media building ’s just 7:20 a.m. , and [we]2140-we make [our]2140-we way to [the top floor]467-the top floor . [I]0-i need to be alone before the craziness begins . [I]0-i walk into [[my]0-i office]529-my office , shut the door , and drop into [my]0-i chair at [my]0-i desk . [The room]613-the room is silent . . . and empty . Through [my]0-i windows [I]0-i can see bustling [New York]3-new york below as [the city]3381-the city prepares for the day . Everything down there seems so normal . . . so in order . [My]0-i temper is simmering like a volcano and dangerously close to exploding . [I]0-i do n’t know if [I]0-i ’m going to smash something or burst into tears . Either way , [I]0-i feel completely unstable . With [my]0-i elbows on the desk , [I]0-i drop [my]0-i head into [my]0-i hands ; [my]0-i breath quivers on the intake as [I]0-i try to calm [myself]0-i down . [She]2148-she told [me]0-i [she]2148-she was going out with [Molly]111-molly and [Aaron]110-aaron last night . [I]0-i go over the conversation [we]2149-we had when [she]2148-she got [home]3076-home . “ How were [[your]0-i friends]4333-your friends ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i asked . “ Great . . . it was good to see [them]4333-your friends , ”[2148-she] [she]2148-she replied . [She]2148-she lied . [I]0-i was at [home]3076-home missing [her]2148-she . . . and [she]2148-she was out with [another man]630-another man . [I]0-i get a lump in [my]0-i throat as reality sets in . [I]0-i ’ve been over here falling madly in love with [her]2148-she . . . while [she]2148-she ’s been seeing [someone else]1023-someone else . The door clicks , and [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes to try and block out [Tristan]135-tristan — [I]0-i know it ’s [him]135-tristan . [He]135-tristan knows [me]0-i better than [anyone]295-anyone . [I]0-i hear [him]135-tristan go to [the bar]534-the bar and drop ice into two glasses , then the comforting sound of scotch being poured . [He]135-tristan places one in front of [me]0-i , and [my]0-i heavy eyes rise to meet [his]135-tristan . [He]135-tristan clinks [his]135-tristan glass with mine as it sits in [my]0-i hand . “ Well , this day fucking sucks already . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan leans on [my]0-i desk with [his]135-tristan behind . “ [You]135-tristan think ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i mutter as [I]0-i take a sip . [I]0-i feel the burn as it glides down [my]0-i throat . “ When was the photo taken ? ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan asks . “ Last night . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan frowns . [I]0-i clench [my]0-i jaw as [I]0-i stare out the window , ashamed that [the woman [I]0-i love]2156-the woman i love does n’t love [me]0-i back . “ [She]2156-the woman i love said [she]2156-the woman i love was out with [Molly]111-molly and [Aaron]110-aaron . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan sips [his]135-tristan scotch and raises [his]135-tristan eyebrows as if surprised that [she]2156-the woman i love lied . “ [I]135-tristan thought [she]2156-the woman i love was [the one]4334-the one . ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i frown , [my]0-i chest constricting once more . “ That makes two of [us]2157-us . ”[0-i] Silence hangs between [us]2157-us . “ Let ’s just get through this day and prove [your]0-i innocence . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan sighs as [he]135-tristan drains [his]135-tristan glass . [I]0-i nod . [He]135-tristan watches [me]0-i for a moment , and eventually [he]135-tristan asks , “ [You]0-i okay ? ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i nod once , unable to push the lie past [my]0-i lips . “ [We]2157-us will prove that [you]0-i ’re innocent , [Jay]158-jay . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan puts [his]135-tristan reassuring hand on [my]0-i shoulder . “ [I]135-tristan promise [you]0-i . ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i drain [my]0-i glass and go to [the bar]534-the bar for a refill . [He]135-tristan watches [me]0-i once more , and [I]0-i know [he]135-tristan ’s choosing [his]135-tristan words wisely . “ Tell [me]135-tristan that [you]0-i ’re all right . ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i lips , and [my]0-i eyes rise to [his]135-tristan . “ [I]0-i ’m all right . ”[0-i] “ Why do [I]135-tristan get the feeling that [you]0-i ’re about to lose [your]0-i shit and kill [someone]401-someone ? ”[135-tristan] “ If [you]0-i want to save a life today , get rid of [Jake Peters]158-jay . ”[135-tristan] “ It ’s already done . [I]0-i called and fired [him]158-jay this morning at five a.m. , as soon as [I]0-i saw the story . ”[0-i] [I]0-i take a sip of the amber fluid ; it heats [my]0-i throat as it goes down . [He]135-tristan pauses before [he]135-tristan asks , “ Do [you]0-i want [me]135-tristan to fire [Emily]91-emily ? ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i stare out the window and over [the city]3381-the city . “ No . ”[0-i] “ [I]135-tristan was thinking . . . , ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan continues . “ Get out , ”[0-i] [I]0-i bark . “ But — ”[0-i] “ Now . ”[135-tristan] The door clicks quietly behind [him]135-tristan , and [I]0-i stand and move to the window and stare out over [the city]3381-the city . Adrenaline surges through [my]0-i body , and [I]0-i feel [the earth]2161-the earth ’s tectonic plates move beneath [me]0-i . [I]0-i sip [my]0-i scotch as a cold , detached determination takes its place in [my]0-i soul . [Nobody]3121-nobody fucks with [me]0-i like this and gets away with it . Get ready to meet [[your]0-i maker]2163-your maker , [Mr. Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara . [Your]0-i day is near . [Emily]91-emily [I]0-i bounce out to [the waiting limo]2164-the waiting limo and see [trusty Alan]152-alan standing beside [it]2164-the waiting limo . [He]152-alan opens the door . “ Good morning , [Alan]152-alan . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan nods . “ Morning . ”[152-alan] [I]0-i frown and get in . [He]152-alan ’s not in a very good mood today . The door closes behind [me]0-i , and [I]0-i look around for the paper . Hmm . . . [Jameson]126-jameson must have taken it with [him]126-jameson this morning . [I]0-i ’m still sleepy and lethargic . There ’s a lot to be said for morning exercise — it definitely wakes [you]0-i up for the day . [I]0-i put [my]0-i head back and close [my]0-i eyes as [we]2165-we roll through the traffic . What feels like ten minutes later , [the car]422-the car comes to a halt and switches off . [I]0-i glance up . [We]2165-we are out in front of [[my]0-i apartment building]2167-my apartment building . Huh ? [Alan]152-alan opens the door . “ What are [you]152-alan doing ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles instructed [me]152-alan to drop [you]152-alan here this morning . ”[152-alan] “ What . . . why ? ”[152-alan] “ [He]114-mr. miles suggested that [you]0-i have the day off . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan gestures with [his]152-alan hand for [me]0-i to get out of [the car]422-the car . “ Huh ? ”[152-alan] [I]0-i frown . “ What ’s going on , [Alan]152-alan ? ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i ’m not sure , but [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles said that [he]114-mr. miles did n’t want [you]0-i to come into [the office]444-the office and that [he]114-mr. miles will be in touch . ”[0-i] [I]0-i screw up [my]0-i face . “ Be in touch — what does that mean ? Why ca n’t [I]0-i go to [the office]444-the office ? [I]0-i ’m confused . ”[0-i] “ [You]0-i need to get out of [the car]422-the car , [Emily]91-emily , ”[152-alan] [he]152-alan asserts . “ What ? ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan gestures again with [his]152-alan hand , and [I]0-i get out in a huff . “ Has something happened ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer as [I]0-i brush past [him]152-alan . “ Is [Jameson]126-jameson all right ? ”[0-i] “ [You]0-i need to speak to [him]126-jameson , [Emily]91-emily . ”[152-alan] “ Fine , [I]0-i will , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap as [I]0-i take out [my]0-i phone and dial [his]152-alan number . “ Goodbye , [Emily]91-emily , ”[152-alan] [Alan]152-alan says before getting into [the limo]811-the limo and quickly pulling out . [Jameson]126-jameson ’s phone rings out . [I]0-i call again . . . it goes straight to voice mail . [He]152-alan ’s switched it off . “ What the fuck ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper , annoyed . [I]0-i go to call [Sammia]116-sammia , [[his]126-jameson PA]4048-his pa , but then realize that it ’s only eight o’clock — [she]116-sammia is n’t even at work yet . What the hell is going on ? [I]0-i cross [the street]654-the street and half walk , half run to [the corner paper stall]2172-the corner paper stall . [I]0-i see the front page of the Gazette , and the blood drains from [my]0-i face as [I]0-i see a half - page picture of [Jake]158-jay and [me]0-i kissing . “ [Dear God]88-god , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [I]0-i read the story . [Jameson Miles]126-jameson — [Media Guru]2173-media guru ’s Fall from [Grace]148-grace In what appears to be the final nail in [[Jameson Miles]126-jameson ’s media coffin]2127-jameson miles ’s media coffin , [[his]126-jameson fiancée]2128-his fiancée , [Emily Foster]91-emily , has been having a secret affair . [The two]2129-the two have been spotted in various locations and were snapped holidaying in [Italy]55-italy two months ago . Leaked bank statements released today prove that [Jameson Miles]126-jameson has been embezzling money and transferring it to an offshore account . [The board]2130-the board is expected to fire [him]126-jameson as [CEO of [Miles Media]12-miles media]2131-ceo of miles media today , and criminal charges will be laid . Looks like [Emily Foster]91-emily jumped [ship]2132-ship just in time . What ? [My]0-i hand goes over [my]0-i mouth in horror . Oh [my]0-i God , poor [Jameson]126-jameson . “ [I]0-i ’m not [[his]126-jameson fiancée]2128-his fiancée , [[you]2181-the paper man fucking idiots]4340-you fucking idiots , ”[0-i] [I]0-i sneer . “ How many things can [you]2181-the paper man possibly fuck up in one story ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i turn and begin to storm back to [[my]0-i apartment]940-my apartment as [I]0-i redial [his]126-jameson number with a sense of urgency . “ Hey , ”[2181-the paper man] [the paper man]2181-the paper man calls out to [me]0-i . “ [You]0-i did n’t pay for that . ”[2181-the paper man] “ Oh , [I]0-i ’m sorry , ”[0-i] [I]0-i apologize as [I]0-i rush back to pay . “ [I]126-jameson was distracted . Thank [you]2181-the paper man . ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson ’s phone goes straight to voice mail once more . What do [I]0-i do ? What do [I]0-i do ? [My]0-i shoulder slams into [a man]3093-a man as [he]3093-a man walks past . “ Hey , watch where [you]0-i ’re going , ”[3093-a man] [he]3093-a man calls . “ Sorry , ”[3093-a man] [I]0-i stammer . [I]0-i dial [Tristan]135-tristan ’s number . “ Hi , [Em]91-emily . ”[0-i] “ [Tristan]135-tristan , what the hell is going on ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i cry . “ [We]4341-we ’re in meetings ; [I]0-i ’ll call [you]135-tristan later . ”[0-i] “ What ? ”[3093-a man] [He]3093-a man hangs up . “ Ahhh , ”[0-i] [I]0-i cry . [My]0-i eyes fill with tears of frustration . [He]3093-a man would n’t believe it . Surely , [he]3093-a man knows it ’s not true . . . but there ’s a photo as evidence . [I]0-i dial [Molly]111-molly ’s number . “ Hey , [chick]4342-chick , do [you]4342-chick want a coffee ? ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly asks chirpily . “ [Molly]111-molly , ”[111-molly] [I]0-i cry in relief that [someone]401-someone answers [their]401-someone damn phone . “ Oh my God , it ’s all lies . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stop on the spot on [the busy sidewalk]2184-the busy sidewalk and move to the side up against [the building]412-the building to talk . “ What ’s wrong ? ”[0-i] “ The Gazette , ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . “ Google [the Gazette]36-the gazette . There ’s an image on the front page of [me]0-i kissing [Jake]158-jay , and it says [we]4343-we are having an affair . ”[0-i] “ What ? ”[0-i] “ [Somebody]271-somebody must have been following [me]0-i , or . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shake [my]0-i head as [I]0-i try and think of a logical explanation . “ What the fucking hell is going on ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper angrily . “ Holy shit . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly pauses . “ [I]111-molly see it . Wait . . . when the fuck did [you]0-i kiss [Jake]158-jay ? ”[111-molly] “ [He]158-jay kissed [me]0-i last night , ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . “ [I]0-i did n’t kiss [him]158-jay back , for fuck ’s sake . Do [you]0-i — ”[0-i] “ Hang on ; [I]111-molly ’m reading , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly interrupts [me]0-i . [I]0-i put [my]0-i hand over [my]0-i face as [I]0-i wait for [her]111-molly to read . “ Oh [my]111-molly God , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly whispers . “ [Alan]152-alan brought [me]111-molly back to [[my]111-molly apartment]940-my apartment and told [me]111-molly not to come into work today . ”[111-molly] “ What ? ”[0-i] “ [He]152-alan said that [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles will contact [me]0-i later . ”[0-i] “ Well , what did [Jameson]126-jameson say ? ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly asks . “ [He]126-jameson wo n’t answer [his]126-jameson phone . [I]111-molly called [Tristan]135-tristan , but [he]126-jameson said [they]4346-they are in meetings , and [he]126-jameson ’ll call [me]111-molly later . ”[111-molly] “ Holy . . . fucking . . . shit . This is bad . ”[0-i] “ [You]111-molly think ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i cry . “ What are [you]111-molly going to do ? ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i do n’t know . What do [I]0-i do ? ”[0-i] “ Well , if [Jameson]126-jameson told [you]0-i to stay [home]3076-home , maybe [you]0-i should . ”[0-i] “ Why ? ”[0-i] “ Because [he]126-jameson does n’t need more attention ; it says here [he]126-jameson ’s been accused of theft . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes widen as [I]0-i imagine the media storm that ’s going to come from this . “ But what if [he]126-jameson believes this ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . “ [I]0-i ’ve never been with [Jake]158-jay . This is complete bullshit . [I]0-i love [him]126-jameson . ”[0-i] “ [He]126-jameson said [he]126-jameson will be in touch . . . [he]126-jameson will be . ”[0-i] [I]0-i listen as [my]0-i mind runs at a million miles an hour . “ [You]0-i ’re just going to have to wait . ”[0-i] [I]0-i screw up [my]0-i face in tears . “ [You]0-i do n’t think [I]0-i should come in ? ”[0-i] “ God , no . [He]126-jameson does n’t have time to worry about [you]0-i too . ”[0-i] “ But [I]0-i did n’t do this , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [I]0-i know . [I]0-i ’ll go up and see [him]126-jameson in [[his]126-jameson office]496-his office and tell [him]126-jameson everything . ”[0-i] “ [You]0-i will ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper hopefully . “ If [you]0-i come in , [Em]91-emily , [the whole building]4349-the whole building is going to attack [you]0-i . ”[0-i] [I]0-i put [my]0-i hands over [my]0-i face in horror as [I]0-i imagine [everyone]3098-everyone waking up to this story this morning . [I]0-i ’m going to be [[Miles Media]12-miles media ’s public enemy number one]2187-miles media ’s public enemy number one . “ [I]2188-i ’m going to get into work and find out what the hell is going on , and [I]2188-i ’ll call [you]0-i back , okay ? ”[2188-i] [she]2188-i says . [I]0-i nod , [my]0-i eyes filled with tears . [I]0-i ca n’t believe this is happening . “ Okay . ”[0-i] “ Go back to [[your]0-i apartment]3695-your apartment and wait . [I]2188-i ’ll be in touch . ”[2188-i] “ Thank [you]2188-i , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i wait on the line . “ Wait , what are [you]0-i going to say to [Jameson]126-jameson ? ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i ’m just going to tell [him]126-jameson the truth . [I]0-i ’ll call [you]2188-i back in half an hour . ”[0-i] [My]0-i shoulders slump . “ Okay , thanks . ”[0-i] [I]0-i hang up . [I]0-i walk from [[my]0-i kitchen]2077-my kitchen and back to [the living area]939-the living area . [I]0-i turn and walk back the same route . It ’s been forty minutes . [Jameson]126-jameson still is n’t answering [his]126-jameson phone , and [Molly]111-molly has n’t called [me]0-i back . What the fucking hell is going on over there ? [I]0-i text [Jameson]126-jameson a message . [Jay]158-jay [I]0-i do n’t know what the hell is going on . That photo is a setup . [You]158-jay know [I]0-i love [you]158-jay and would never do that . Call [me]0-i back , please . [I]0-i ’m freaking out ! ! ! [I]0-i throw [my]0-i phone onto [the lounge]273-the lounge and continue [my]0-i pacing . Why is n’t anyone calling [me]0-i back ? [I]0-i wait twenty minutes and then text [Jameson]126-jameson again . [My]0-i phone rings , and [I]0-i scramble to answer it . It ’s [Molly]111-molly . “ Hello . ”[111-molly] “ Hi . ”[126-jameson] “ What happened ? ”[111-molly] “ [I]111-molly could n’t get in to see [him]126-jameson ; [he]126-jameson was in a meeting with [the solicitors]4351-the solicitors , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly whispers . “ [He]126-jameson ’s got bigger things to worry about at the moment , [Em]91-emily . [He]126-jameson could go to prison . ”[111-molly] [I]0-i frown . What ? “ Oh [my]0-i God . ”[0-i] “ [Management]4352-management is going nuts down here . [I]111-molly have to get off the phone before [I]111-molly get fired . ”[111-molly] “ What ? ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes fill with tears . . . [I]0-i did n’t do this . “ [I]0-i could give a rat ’s ass about [the company]3166-the company right now . [I]0-i need [him]126-jameson to know that [I]0-i did n’t do anything with [Jake]158-jay . That whole story is bogus . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i know . [I]0-i ’ll go back up in [my]0-i lunch break . But for now , hang tight . ”[0-i] [I]0-i put [my]0-i hand over [my]0-i mouth as a roll of nausea fills [my]0-i stomach . “ [I]0-i ’ll call [you]2193-you back as soon as [I]0-i speak to [him]2194-he . ”[0-i] [I]0-i wait on the line , hoping for a miracle answer to come to [us]2192-us . “ Okay ? ”[2193-you] [she]2193-you asks . “ Yeah , okay , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper before hanging up the call . [I]0-i begin to pace once more with a new sense of urgency . What if [he]2194-he believes this ? What if [the board]2130-the board believes that [he]2194-he stole the money ? What if [he]2194-he ’s charged . . . and goes to [prison]2196-prison ? Oh [my]0-i God . [I]0-i text [him]2194-he again . [I]0-i ’m serious . Call [me]0-i back NOW ! ! [I]0-i ’m losing [my]0-i mind over here . Another thirty minutes pass as [I]0-i continue to pace . [I]0-i ca n’t deal with this waiting . [I]0-i call [Molly]111-molly , and it goes straight to voice mail . [I]0-i hang up in a fluster and call [Aaron]110-aaron . [His]110-aaron phone rings out . “ What the actual hell ! ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i cry through tears . “ What ’s going on over there ? ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i text [Jameson]126-jameson again . Call [me]0-i now , or [I]0-i ’m coming into [the office]444-the office ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! [I]0-i ’m getting angry , [you]2198-you must know [I]0-i ’m frantic . [My]0-i phone rings , and the letter J lights up the screen . [I]0-i pick up a rush . “ Oh [my]0-i God , [Jay]158-jay . ”[0-i] “ Hi , ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron answers , monotone . “ What ’s going on ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [Jay]158-jay . [I]0-i ca n’t believe the lies . [He]110-aaron kissed [me]0-i once , and [I]0-i slapped [him]110-aaron across the face . [I]0-i promise [you]158-jay that [I]0-i ’m not seeing that slimeball . ”[0-i] [He]110-aaron stays silent . A sense of dread fills [me]0-i . Why is [he]110-aaron so quiet ? “ [Jay]158-jay . ”[110-aaron] “ [You]158-jay did n’t think to tell [me]110-aaron about this ? ”[110-aaron] “ It only happened last night . ”[110-aaron] “ [You]158-jay said [you]158-jay were with fucking [Molly]111-molly ! ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron screams . [My]0-i eyes fill with tears at the sound of [his]110-aaron anger . “ [I]110-aaron know [I]110-aaron did , but [he]110-aaron said [he]110-aaron had some information about the case , and [I]110-aaron knew [you]158-jay would n’t want [me]110-aaron to meet [him]110-aaron alone . ”[110-aaron] “ [I]110-aaron wonder fucking why ? ”[110-aaron] [he]110-aaron bellows . [I]0-i screw up [my]0-i face . “ Do n’t be angry with [me]0-i , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ That picture is . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shake [my]0-i head as [I]0-i try to articulate what it is that [I]0-i want to say . “ It ’s taken out of context , [I]0-i promise [you]158-jay . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i have to go . Stay out of sight . [I]0-i do n’t need to worry about [you]158-jay too . ”[0-i] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . “ [I]0-i ’m too busy . ”[0-i] “ Do n’t go , ”[0-i] [I]0-i plead . “ [Jay]158-jay , [we]4354-we need to talk about this . [I]0-i ’ll come to [[your]158-jay office]3302-your office now . ”[0-i] “ Do n’t [you]0-i dare , ”[2199-he] [he]2199-he sneers . [My]0-i eyes widen . “ What do [you]2199-he mean ? ”[2199-he] “ There are [a million and fucking one people]4356-a million and fucking one people in [[my]2199-he office]529-my office right now , and [I]2199-he do n’t have the fucking time to deal with [your]0-i shit , ”[2199-he] [he]2199-he growls . [I]0-i cringe . . . God , [I]0-i ’ve never heard [him]2199-he so angry . “ Will [I]0-i see [you]2199-he tonight ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Goodbye , [Emily]91-emily . ”[0-i] The line goes dead . [I]0-i drop to the couch and stare at the wall . . . a sick sense of dread begins to sink in . . . [he]2199-he believes it . Holy fuck . Eight o’clock that evening [I]0-i sit on [the lounge]273-the lounge and listen to the sound of a movie as it plays on the television . [I]0-i ca n’t watch the news . [I]0-i had to turn it off . It ’s going on and on about the evidence building against [Jameson]126-jameson and the embezzlement case . [My]0-i mind is miles away . [Jameson]126-jameson has n’t called [me]0-i back all day , and [I]0-i do n’t know what ’s going on over there at [Miles Media]12-miles media , but [I]0-i know it ’s a media circus . [I]0-i ’m torn between giving [him]126-jameson the space that [he]126-jameson needs and running to [him]126-jameson as fast as [I]0-i can . [I]0-i ’ve decided that [I]0-i ’m going to do as [he]126-jameson asked and just stay here and sit tight . [He]126-jameson will call [me]0-i as soon as [he]126-jameson can . [I]0-i know [he]126-jameson will , and [he]126-jameson ’s right — [me]0-i being out and about will only add fuel to the fire . [He]126-jameson really does n’t need to worry about [me]0-i , too , at the moment . The magnitude of the situation has finally sunk in . What ’s going to happen if [they]2201-they ca n’t find out who transferred that money ? How long can [Jameson]126-jameson deal with this type of pressure ? With a lump in [my]0-i throat [I]0-i begin to pace . [My]0-i carpet must be nearly threadbare after today ’s pacing activities . [I]0-i ca n’t remember ever being this stressed . At eleven o’clock at night , [I]0-i have n’t heard from [Jameson]126-jameson , and [I]0-i am sick with worry , literally . [I]0-i ’ve thrown up twice . [I]0-i decide to call [him]126-jameson one last time . . . where is [he]126-jameson ? With shaky fingers , [I]0-i dial [his]126-jameson number , and it rings and then goes to voice mail . [He]126-jameson ’s declined the call . [My]0-i heart sinks , and [my]0-i eyes fill with tears . “ This is [Jameson Miles]126-jameson ; leave a message , ”[126-jameson] the recorded message plays . “ Hello . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause . “ [Jay]158-jay , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [Baby]207-baby . ”[0-i] [I]0-i get a lump in [my]0-i throat . “ [I]0-i ’m sorry for lying . [I]0-i was trying to find out about the case , and then [he]126-jameson kissed [me]0-i and . . . ”[0-i] [My]0-i voice trails off . “ [I]0-i know how this looks , but [you]158-jay have to believe [me]0-i . [I]0-i do n’t even like [Jake]158-jay as [a friend]3096-a friend ; [you]158-jay know that . ”[0-i] [I]0-i walk to the window and stare out over the traffic . “ [I]0-i ’m going out of [my]0-i mind here . . . [I]0-i love [you]158-jay . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stay silent , unsure what to say . “ Do n’t let [them]4359-them poison [your]158-jay mind , [Jay]158-jay . [You]158-jay ’re [the only person who knows what [we]4361-we have]4360-the only person who knows what we have , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper through tears . “ Come home to [me]0-i , where [you]158-jay belong . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause , hoping that [I]0-i ’m getting through to [him]2202-him . “ [I]0-i do n’t even want to hang up . . . [I]0-i need [you]158-jay . Please come over . . . [I]0-i ’m begging . ”[0-i] The other end stays deathly silent , and [I]0-i screw up [my]0-i face in pain . “ [I]0-i love [you]158-jay , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . The beep sounds , and [I]0-i am cut off . [I]0-i throw the phone onto [the lounge]273-the lounge and begin to cry . What the hell is happening ? With [my]0-i heart in [my]0-i throat , [I]0-i walk into [the Miles Media building]624-the miles media building . It ’s eight thirty in the morning , and [I]0-i ’m coming to work . [Jay]158-jay did n’t call [me]0-i back last night , and [I]0-i ca n’t say that [I]0-i blame [him]158-jay . [I]0-i cried [myself]0-i to sleep . . . well , [I]0-i did n’t really sleep , so [I]0-i do n’t think it counts . [I]0-i ’ve got this sick lead ball in [my]0-i stomach , and it wo n’t go away . [I]0-i have [no one]2205-no one to blame for this fucking mess but [myself]0-i . [I]0-i lied to [[my]0-i love]2206-my love , and it backfired , and now [he]158-jay thinks the worst . So [I]0-i ’m here today to do the best job that [I]0-i can of making it up to [him]158-jay . [He]158-jay ’s hurt . . . [I]0-i know [he]158-jay is . [[My]0-i poor man]2100-my poor man seemingly has the whole world against [him]158-jay , and [I]0-i ’m so worried about [him]158-jay . How much stress can [a man]3093-a man take before [he]3093-a man cracks ? [I]0-i get into [the elevator]428-the elevator and swipe [my]0-i security card to [the top floors]2210-the top floors , and a red light comes up . [I]0-i frown . No . [I]0-i swipe it again , and the red light flickers again . “ No , [Jay]158-jay . . . do n’t do this , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper through tears . “ Do n’t [you]158-jay fucking lock [me]0-i out . ”[0-i] [I]0-i swipe it again ; the red light flickers once more . “ [[You]158-jay son of [a bitch]3394-a bitch]4362-you son of a bitch , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper angrily . [I]0-i hit the fortieth - floor button , and the green light appears . [My]0-i heart begins to hammer hard in [my]0-i chest . [He]2211-he ’s blocked [my]0-i access to [[his]2211-he floor]2212-his floor . [I]0-i take out [my]0-i phone and text [him]2211-he . Are [you]2211-he serious ? [You]2211-he ca n’t even talk to [me]0-i ? The elevator doors open , and [I]0-i stride out onto [[my]0-i floor]621-my floor as [I]0-i try to calm [my]0-i anger down . [I]0-i know [he]2211-he ’s got a lot going on , but [he]2211-he knows this is hurting [me]0-i , and [he]2211-he does n’t seem to care . Is this how [he]2211-he works ? [He]2211-he ’s just going to cut [me]0-i from [his]2211-he life without even letting [me]0-i explain ? [I]0-i sit at [my]0-i desk and stare into space . [My]0-i leg bounces in anger . . . what do [I]0-i do ? How do [I]0-i make [him]2211-he understand that this is all a misunderstanding if [he]2211-he wo n’t even talk to [me]0-i ? [A group of girls]1659-a group of girls walk out of [the elevator]428-the elevator and begin to walk down [the corridor]728-the corridor , and then [they]1659-a group of girls all stop on the spot when [they]1659-a group of girls see [me]0-i , as if shocked . [I]0-i stare at [them]1659-a group of girls , and [they]1659-a group of girls exchange looks and then smirk to [each other]351-each other . “ Hi . ”[2218-one of them] [One of [them]1659-a group of girls]2218-one of them fakes a smile . “ Hi , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply . [I]0-i turn and switch on [my]0-i computer . Great . Now [I]0-i ’m the office gossip as well — can this fucking situation get any worse ? “ Yay , [you]0-i ’re here , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly ’s familiar voice sounds from behind [me]0-i . [I]0-i swing in [my]0-i chair toward [her]111-molly , and [her]111-molly face falls when [she]111-molly sees [mine]0-i . “ Oh , [baby]3139-baby , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly whispers as [she]111-molly puts [her]111-molly arms around [me]0-i . “ Are [you]0-i all right ? ”[111-molly] “ [He]4365-he ’s blocked [my]0-i access to [[his]4365-he floor]2212-his floor , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper against [her]111-molly shoulder . “ What ? ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly whispers as [she]111-molly fixes [my]0-i hair . “ [He]4365-he ’s just . . . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly hesitates . “ God , [I]111-molly do n’t even know what to say , [Em]91-emily . ”[111-molly] [I]0-i stare sadly at [my]0-i computer . “ Let ’s just get [our]4367-our work done , and [we]4367-our can brainstorm over lunch . ”[0-i] [She]111-molly smiles as [she]111-molly rubs [my]0-i shoulder . “ Yeah , [I]111-molly guess . ”[111-molly] Over the next half hour , [I]0-i watch on as [everyone]3098-everyone arrives for [their]3098-everyone day , sees [me]0-i , and then proceeds to whisper to [the person next to [them]3098-everyone]2220-the person next to them . [I]0-i ’m not only [the office gossip]2221-the office gossip ; [I]0-i ’m [the office slut]2222-the office slut . [The idiot who played upon [the CEO]3206-the ceo with the company douche]2223-the idiot who played upon the ceo with the company douche . . . [I]0-i ’m embarrassed , [I]0-i ’m ashamed , and this is appalling . It ’s four o’clock , and [Jameson]126-jameson has n’t answered any of [my]0-i calls . [I]0-i think [I]0-i ’m losing [my]0-i mind . [Aaron]110-aaron thinks [I]0-i should give [him]110-aaron time . [Molly]111-molly thinks [I]0-i should be dropped onto [his]110-aaron floor by [a helicopter]2225-a helicopter . . . either that or bomb [the whole floor]2226-the whole floor . [Me]0-i . . . [I]0-i just want to crawl under a rock and hide . [Molly]111-molly returns from [the photocopy room]4311-the photocopy room and smiles sweetly over at [me]0-i . “ What ? ”[111-molly] “ Say , ‘ Thank [you]0-i , [Molly]111-molly . [You]0-i ’re [a lifesaver]4368-a lifesaver . ’ ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly smirks . [I]0-i frown . [She]111-molly passes [me]0-i over a security card , and [I]0-i stare at it in [my]0-i hand . “ What ’s this ? ”[111-molly] “ It ’s [Melissa]193-elizabeth ’s card to get to [the top floors]2210-the top floors . [I]0-i stole it . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes widen . “ [You]0-i stole [her]193-elizabeth card ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i look around guiltily . “ How else are [you]0-i going to get to see [the stupid fuck]4370-the stupid fuck ? ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly murmurs . [I]0-i smile at [her]111-molly perfect choice of words . “ Thanks . ”[0-i] [I]0-i go to [the bathroom]328-the bathroom and stare at [my]0-i reflection in the mirror . [I]0-i look like shit . [I]0-i drop [my]0-i shoulders and inhale deeply as [I]0-i steel [myself]0-i . Let ’s do this . [I]0-i take [the elevator]428-the elevator to [the top floor]467-the top floor , with [my]0-i heart hammering hard in [my]0-i chest . [I]0-i have no idea what ’s going to be awaiting [me]0-i , but bring it the fuck on , because [I]0-i ’m getting angry now . How dare [he]2231-his not even let [me]0-i explain ? The elevator opens , and [Sammia]116-sammia ’s face drops as [she]116-sammia sees [me]0-i . “ [Emily]91-emily , ”[116-sammia] [she]116-sammia stammers as [she]116-sammia stands . “ [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles is n’t [here]275-here . ”[116-sammia] [I]0-i storm past [her]116-sammia and down [the hall]729-the hall and open [his]2231-his door in a rush . . . and there [he]2231-his sits behind [his]2231-his desk , [his]2231-his cold , calm persona firmly in place . [Elliot]155-elliot is sitting with [him]2231-his , and [his]155-elliot eyes snap up . “ How did [you]0-i get up [here]275-here ? ”[155-elliot] [My]0-i eyes find [Jameson]126-jameson ’s across [the room]613-the room , and [I]0-i can see the hurt from here . “ Can [you]0-i give [us]4373-us a moment , please ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ No , ”[155-elliot] [Elliot]155-elliot snaps . “ Leave now . ”[155-elliot] [My]0-i anger bubbles . “ With all due respect , this is none of [your]0-i business , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . [Elliot]155-elliot narrows [his]155-elliot eyes and stands . “ How dare [you]0-i — this is entirely [my]155-elliot business ! ”[155-elliot] “ Oh , [I]0-i dare all right , ”[0-i] [I]0-i fire back . [Jameson]126-jameson clenches [his]126-jameson jaw , and [Tristan]135-tristan comes into [the office]444-the office . [His]135-tristan step falters when [he]135-tristan sees [me]0-i . “ [Emily]91-emily . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan frowns as [he]135-tristan looks between [the three of [us]629-the three of us]629-the three of us . “ [Tristan]135-tristan , [I]135-tristan need a moment with [Jameson]126-jameson , please , ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i ask [him]135-tristan hopefully . “ Of course . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan forces a weak smile . “ Out , [Elliot]155-elliot . ”[135-tristan] [Elliot]155-elliot glares at [me]0-i . “ Now , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan repeats . [Elliot]155-elliot and [Tristan]135-tristan leave [the office]444-the office , and [we]629-the three of us are left alone . [Jameson]126-jameson stands and goes to the window , turning [his]126-jameson back to [me]0-i . Oh God , how do [I]0-i fix this ? “ [Jay]158-jay , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i walk toward [him]126-jameson . “ [Baby]207-baby , [I]0-i did n’t do this . . . [you]207-baby have to believe [me]0-i . [I]0-i know how this looks . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson remains silent . “ [He]126-jameson kissed [me]0-i , and [I]0-i slapped [him]126-jameson , and [I]0-i had no idea that [someone]401-someone took a photo , ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . Silence . [I]0-i see [his]126-jameson jaw clench from the side as [he]126-jameson stares out over [New York]3-new york . “ Are [you]126-jameson at least going to talk to [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i cry . “ Why did [you]126-jameson block [my]0-i access to this floor ? ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson turns , angered . “ Because [I]126-jameson do n’t trust [you]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i step back , shocked . “ What ? ”[0-i] “ [You]126-jameson heard [me]0-i . [I]0-i do n’t trust [you]126-jameson . Get out . ”[0-i] [My]0-i face falls . “ [Jameson]126-jameson , [I]0-i know [you]126-jameson ’re under a lot of pressure . ”[0-i] “ This has nothing to do with the fucking pressure [I]126-jameson ’m under ! ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson screams . [I]0-i wither . “ [You]126-jameson can trust [me]0-i , [I]0-i promise [you]126-jameson . ”[0-i] “ Where did [you]0-i tell [me]126-jameson [you]0-i were on Monday night , [Emily]91-emily ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson sneers . [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson through tears . “ [I]0-i was trying to find out information . ”[0-i] “ By lying to [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i nod . “ [I]0-i know it sounds like . . . ”[0-i] “ Like [I]126-jameson ca n’t trust [you]0-i . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson turns [his]126-jameson back and lifts [his]126-jameson chin skyward in defiance . “ [I]126-jameson have more to worry about at the moment than dealing with [a deceitful girlfriend]4375-a deceitful girlfriend . ”[126-jameson] “ [Jameson]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [We]4376-we have nothing to further talk about , [Emily]91-emily . . . get out , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says calmly . “ No , ”[0-i] [I]0-i plead . “ [I]126-jameson ’m not leaving . [I]126-jameson love [you]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson turns , and [his]126-jameson cold eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ Did [you]0-i practice that speech ? ”[126-jameson] [My]0-i heart drops . . . oh , [he]126-jameson ’s so hurt . “ [Jay]158-jay . . . ”[126-jameson] “ If [you]0-i wo n’t leave . . . [I]126-jameson will . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson strides toward the door , and it closes quietly behind [him]126-jameson . [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes in the silence and inhale through [my]0-i shaking chest . Did [he]126-jameson just end [us]2237-us ? This ca n’t be happening . It ’s six o’clock , and [I]0-i ’m sitting at [the café across [the street]654-the street from [Miles Media]12-miles media]2238-the café across the street from miles media . [I]0-i ’m watching [the media circus]2240-the media circus gather as [they]2240-the media circus wait for [Jameson]126-jameson to leave [the building]412-the building . This embezzlement scandal is news . . . big news , and while the rest of [the world]268-the world is hanging on to the story , [I]0-i ’ve been on the edge of tears all day . [I]0-i do n’t know what to do or how to reach [him]126-jameson . [He]126-jameson ’s put [his]126-jameson defenses up , and with everything else going on for [him]126-jameson at the moment , [I]0-i do n’t know how hard [I]0-i can push without [him]126-jameson completely losing it . [I]0-i do n’t want to stress [him]126-jameson out further , but [he]126-jameson needs [me]0-i more than ever at the moment . [I]0-i put [my]0-i head into [my]0-i hands . Why the hell did [I]0-i go and meet [Jake]158-jay ? What the fuck was [I]0-i thinking ? How was that ever a good idea ? [I]0-i go over that night in [my]0-i head , and [I]0-i can hear [myself]0-i lying straight out to [Jameson]126-jameson when [I]0-i got [home]3076-home . . . why ? At the time , [I]0-i thought [I]0-i was protecting [him]126-jameson . [I]0-i know better now . This is one big mess , and [I]0-i have no idea how to fix it . [My]0-i mind goes to the money that has been stolen from the accounts . [They]2244-they all think it ’s [Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara , but why would [Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara , [a man who already makes billions of dollars a year , risk it all to take down [a competitor]3554-a competitor]2245-a man who already makes billions of dollars a year , risk it all to take down a competitor ? It just does n’t make sense to [me]0-i . In [my]0-i eyes , [the person who has stolen the millions]2247-the person who has stolen the millions needs the millions . But who is it , and how the hell did [they]2244-they get access to [Jameson]126-jameson ’s banking details ? There ’s more to this case than meets the eye . [Molly]111-molly , [Aaron]110-aaron , and [I]0-i are having a crisis breakfast meeting tomorrow , and hopefully together [we]2248-we can brainstorm a plan of action . [I]0-i hear a flurry of excitement , and [I]0-i look up to see [Jameson]126-jameson walk from [the building]412-the building , flanked by [security]272-security as [the reporters]2251-the reporters clamber around [him]126-jameson , shouting [his]126-jameson name and clicking photos . [He]126-jameson keeps [his]126-jameson head down and does n’t comment and then climbs into the back of [[his]126-jameson limo]2252-his limo . It pulls out from the curb and whisks [him]126-jameson away into the night . . . and further away from [me]0-i . An overwhelming sadness seeps into [my]0-i bones . How can [I]0-i help [him]126-jameson ? “ Okay , so here are the facts , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly states . [We]2248-we ’re at breakfast trying to dissect [my]0-i mess of a life . [I]0-i ’m more zombie than human , having not slept for two nights . [I]0-i ’m on [my]0-i second coffee , and it ’s seven o’clock . “ [You]0-i lied to [Jameson]126-jameson about where [you]0-i were going and went out to dinner with [Jake]158-jay , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly says . [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . “ [You]0-i got [home]3076-home and then lied again to [Jameson]126-jameson about where [you]0-i had been . ”[0-i] [I]0-i blow out a deep breath . “ Correct . ”[0-i] “ Now , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly continues , “ [Jameson]126-jameson ’s whole life is falling apart , and [he]126-jameson is being accused of a crime that [he]126-jameson did n’t do . ”[111-molly] “ Yes , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap before [I]0-i sip [my]0-i coffee . “ [The entire world]4378-the entire world is watching , and [you]0-i are [public enemy number one]4379-public enemy number one . ”[0-i] “ How is this fucking helping [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . [Aaron]110-aaron and [Molly]111-molly make eye contact across the table . “ This does n’t look good , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron says . “ [I]110-aaron know . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i put [my]0-i head into [my]0-i hands . “ [I]0-i do n’t know how to help [him]126-jameson . [I]0-i ’ve completely screwed everything up . [I]0-i ’m [the villain in this story]4380-the villain in this story , and [I]0-i want to be [the hero]4381-the hero . ”[0-i] Silence falls across the table as [we]2253-we sip [our]2253-we coffees . [Aarons]208-aarons eyes light up . “ [I]208-aarons ’ve got it . ”[208-aarons] “ Huh ? ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i know how [you]208-aarons could be [the hero]4381-the hero . ”[0-i] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . “ How ? ”[0-i] “ Solve the case . . . [you]208-aarons ’re [a reporter]3450-a reporter ; [you]208-aarons ’ve done this shit before . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sit up , suddenly interested . “ [Those private investigators]4384-those private investigators are obviously fucking useless ; [they]4384-those private investigators are doing nothing . ”[0-i] “ That ’s true . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ But [I]0-i do n’t know anything about computers . Where would [I]0-i even start trying to track those transfers ? ”[0-i] “ [I]111-molly do n’t know , but finding out where that money has gone [yourself]208-aarons does seem like the only way [you]208-aarons are getting [Jameson]126-jameson out of this . ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly shrugs . “ [We]4385-we could help ? ”[111-molly] [I]0-i think about it for a moment . Why could n’t [I]0-i do this [myself]0-i ? [I]0-i ’ve cracked cases before — big cases too . “ [You]111-molly know what — [you’re]111-molly right . ”[0-i] [I]0-i feel a fire start in [my]0-i stomach . “ [I]111-molly am going to find out who ’s doing this . ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly and [Aaron]110-aaron smile . “ And when [I]110-aaron do”—I[110-aaron] punch [my]0-i hand into [my]0-i fist—“they will wish [they]4386-they were fucking dead for messing with [[my]110-aaron man]3820-my man . ”[110-aaron] “ [Attagirl]56-attagirl . ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly smiles . [She]111-molly and [Aaron]110-aaron high - five each other . [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i sip [my]0-i coffee , and for the first time in days , [I]0-i feel hopeful . [I]0-i hold [my]0-i coffee cup up , and [we]2254-we all clink cups . “ To Operation Hero . ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson [I]0-i run down [the street]654-the street as fast as [I]0-i can , [my]0-i mind a clouded fog . With every step that [I]0-i run . . . the better [I]0-i feel . It ’s been three days since [I]0-i ’ve seen [her]2256-her . . . three days incarcerated in hell . [I]0-i ca n’t see [her]2256-her . [I]0-i ca n’t put [myself]0-i in that position ever again . [Nobody]3121-nobody is worth feeling this bad for . . . [nobody]3121-nobody . [I]0-i turn the corner and run past a row of [restaurants]2259-restaurants and get to [a park]2260-a park , and [I]0-i see [a person up ahead in the darkness]2261-a person up ahead in the darkness . [Their]2261-a person up ahead in the darkness stance seems familiar , and [I]0-i squint [my]0-i eyes to try and see . As [I]0-i run , a cold sense of realization hits [me]0-i as to who it is . [Gabriel Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara . [He]196-gabriel ferrara ’s on the phone and smoking a cigar as [he]196-gabriel ferrara leans on [his]196-gabriel ferrara black Ferrari . [He]196-gabriel ferrara has n’t seen [me]0-i . [I]0-i stop running and pant as [I]0-i approach [him]196-gabriel ferrara . Fucking dog . [I]0-i ’m furious that [he]196-gabriel ferrara put that photo of [Emily]91-emily on the front page of [his]196-gabriel ferrara paper . It was a direct attack on [me]0-i . . . and it hit the target . Turning , [he]196-gabriel ferrara sees [me]0-i , and [his]196-gabriel ferrara face falls . “ [I]196-gabriel ferrara ’ve got to go . ”[196-gabriel ferrara] [He]196-gabriel ferrara hangs up [his]196-gabriel ferrara call . “ Look what crawled out of the gutter , ”[196-gabriel ferrara] [I]0-i pant . [He]196-gabriel ferrara smirks as [he]196-gabriel ferrara inhales on [his]196-gabriel ferrara cigar . “ [Miles]126-jameson . ”[196-gabriel ferrara] [I]0-i glare at [him]196-gabriel ferrara . “ How ’s [that girl of yours]4388-that girl of yours ? ”[196-gabriel ferrara] [he]196-gabriel ferrara asks with a wink . “ [You]0-i should put [her]4388-that girl of yours on a leash . ”[196-gabriel ferrara] [I]0-i glare at [him]196-gabriel ferrara . [He]196-gabriel ferrara flicks [his]196-gabriel ferrara cigar at [me]0-i ; [my]0-i fury begins to bubble . [I]0-i step forward . “ [You]196-gabriel ferrara know [she]4388-that girl of yours made a move on [me]0-i . Seems like [you]196-gabriel ferrara ’ve lost [your]196-gabriel ferrara edge with everything : [the company]3166-the company , the bank accounts . Sex . How does it feel to have [[your]196-gabriel ferrara woman]4390-your woman search for someone who can satisfy [her]4390-your woman needs ? ”[0-i] All [I]0-i can see is red . . . blinding anger . [I]0-i lose control and punch [him]196-gabriel ferrara hard in the face , and then [I]0-i hit [him]196-gabriel ferrara again and again in quick succession . [He]196-gabriel ferrara falls to the ground beside [[his]196-gabriel ferrara car]4021-his car , and [I]0-i hear [someone]401-someone yell , “ Call [the police]421-the police ! ”[401-someone] “ Fuck . . . ”[401-someone] [I]0-i look down to [his]196-gabriel ferrara slumped body and the blood pouring from [his]196-gabriel ferrara nose . What have [I]0-i done ? [I]0-i turn and sprint as hard as [I]0-i can into the darkness . [I]0-i run down [a block]2264-a block and cut through [a park]2260-a park as [I]0-i hear a police siren in the distance . Fuck . [I]0-i run across [the street]654-the street , and [a car]1671-a car comes out of nowhere . Bright lights , car horn , blurred vision . It hits [me]0-i , and [I]0-i go flying into the air . Darkness . . . nothing . Chapter 22 [Emily]91-emily On [my]0-i laptop , [I]0-i scroll through the information that [I]0-i ’ve collected today . [I]0-i have nothing to go on other than [Hayden]113-hayden . [He]113-hayden ’s the only [the person who has a shady past]2268-the person who has a shady past and [the only person [I]0-i can think of who would double - cross [Miles Media]103-miles media]2269-the only person i can think of who would double - cross miles media . But selling shitty stories is a far cry from stealing millions of dollars from [a global company]2270-a global company . [I]0-i do n’t think [he]113-hayden ’s capable of something like this . So why is [my]0-i gut telling [me]0-i that [he]113-hayden is somehow involved ? [I]0-i check [my]0-i phone . . . no messages . Please call [me]0-i . [I]0-i get a vision of [[my]0-i Jameson]2271-my jameson all alone in [[his]2271-my jameson big apartment]2272-his big apartment , and [my]0-i heart aches . [I]0-i ’ve decided that [I]0-i ’m going over there tomorrow night and knocking the door down . [I]0-i ca n’t give [him]2271-my jameson the space that [he]2271-my jameson needs . . . [I]0-i need [him]2271-my jameson . The door buzzes , and [I]0-i jump up , excited . [Jameson]126-jameson . [I]0-i run to the telecom to see [two police officers on the screen]2273-two police officers on the screen . [I]0-i push the button . “ Hello ? ”[0-i] “ Is that [Emily Foster]91-emily ? ”[126-jameson] “ Yes . ”[126-jameson] “ Can [we]2273-two police officers on the screen come up , please ? ”[0-i] “ What ’s wrong ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . Oh [my]0-i God , what ’s happened ? “ [We]2273-two police officers on the screen need to talk to [you]2271-my jameson . ”[126-jameson] “ Has something happened ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . “ Let [us]2273-two police officers on the screen in , please . ”[0-i] “ Okay . ”[0-i] [I]0-i push the button with [my]0-i heart pumping hard . Moments later [they]2273-two police officers on the screen knock on the door , and [I]0-i open it in a rush . “ Hello . ”[0-i] [Two solemn - looking police officers]2274-two solemn - looking police officers force a smile . “ Are [you]91-emily [Emily Foster]91-emily ? ”[2274-two solemn - looking police officers] “ Yes . ”[0-i] [My]0-i heart begins to race . “ Can [we]2273-two police officers on the screen talk to [you]2271-my jameson for a moment , please ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i stand back . “ Yes , please come in . ”[0-i] “ [We]2273-two police officers on the screen would like to talk to [Jameson Miles]126-jameson , please . ”[2273-two police officers on the screen] [They]2273-two police officers on the screen look around [[my]0-i apartment]940-my apartment and then turn [their]2273-two police officers on the screen attention back to [me]0-i . “ Is [he]126-jameson [here]275-here ? ”[2273-two police officers on the screen] “ No , [he]126-jameson is n’t . ”[0-i] [I]0-i feel [my]0-i heart begin to pump harder in [my]0-i chest . “ What ’s this about ? ”[0-i] “ [He]126-jameson ’s wanted for questioning in regards to an assault earlier this evening . ”[2273-two police officers on the screen] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ [Gabriel Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara was attacked tonight outside [a restaurant]927-a restaurant by [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles . A warrant has been issued for [his]126-jameson arrest . ”[0-i] “ Is [he]126-jameson all right ? ”[2273-two police officers on the screen] “ [Mr. Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara has significant facial injuries and has been taken to [the hospital]1612-the hospital . ”[0-i] [I]0-i put [my]0-i hand over [my]0-i mouth in horror . “ What happened ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [Mr. Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara was getting into [a car]1671-a car when [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles approached [him]196-gabriel ferrara in the dark . A fight broke out , and [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles assaulted [him]196-gabriel ferrara . ”[0-i] “ Where was this ? ”[0-i] “ Out the front of [Bryant Park]57-bryant park , opposite [[Lucina]209-lucina ’s]4396-lucina ’s . ”[0-i] “ Oh [my]0-i God , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Is [Jameson]126-jameson all right ? ”[0-i] “ [Witnesses]4397-witnesses say [he]126-jameson ran off through [the park]4398-the park . ”[0-i] [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes in relief . . . thank [God]88-god . “ [You]0-i have [the wrong person]4399-the wrong person , ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . “ [Jameson]126-jameson would never attack [someone]401-someone . [He]126-jameson ’s [the CEO of [a company]4402-a company]4401-the ceo of a company , not [a pub brawler]4403-a pub brawler . ”[0-i] That ’s a complete lie ; [I]0-i know [Jameson]126-jameson would love to beat [Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara to a pulp . . . “ [I]0-i do n’t know where [he]196-gabriel ferrara is , ”[0-i] [I]0-i assert with renewed determination . “ Can [we]421-the police search [[your]0-i apartment]3695-your apartment ? ”[2276-the policeman] [the policeman]2276-the policeman asks . “ Of course . [He]196-gabriel ferrara ’s not [here]275-here , though . ”[2276-the policeman] [I]0-i stand back to allow [them]2276-the policeman access . [The police]421-the police search [the apartment]3531-the apartment and come back to [me]0-i in [the living area]939-the living area . [They]421-the police hand [me]0-i a business card . “ As soon as [you]0-i hear from [him]196-gabriel ferrara , [you]0-i need to call [us]421-the police . If [you]0-i do n’t , [you]0-i may be charged with obstruction of justice . Hiding [a person of interest]4406-a person of interest from [authorities]4407-authorities is a very serious offense . ”[421-the police] “ Okay . ”[0-i] [I]0-i storm to the door and open it in a rush . “ Good night . ”[0-i] [The officers]2280-the officers leave , and [I]0-i close the door behind [them]2280-the officers with a slam . [I]0-i put [my]0-i two hands over [my]0-i mouth in horror and dial the number . [Jameson]126-jameson ’s phone rings out . . . [he]126-jameson would n’t answer [my]0-i call anyway . “ Damn it . ”[126-jameson] In a panic , [I]0-i call [Tristan]135-tristan . “ Hello . ”[135-tristan] “ [Tristan]135-tristan , ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . “ Do [you]135-tristan know where [Jameson]126-jameson is ? ”[0-i] “ What ’s wrong ? ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan says . “ [The police]421-the police were just here , and [Jameson]126-jameson apparently assaulted [Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara . [They]421-the police ’ve issued a warrant for [his]126-jameson arrest . Do [you]135-tristan know where [he]126-jameson is ? ”[135-tristan] “ What ? ”[0-i] “ [He]126-jameson ’s not answering [my]0-i calls , and [witnesses]4397-witnesses said [he]126-jameson ran off across [the park]4398-the park . ”[0-i] “ What the fuck ? ”[135-tristan] “ What do [I]0-i do ? ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i ’ll try calling [him]126-jameson and call [you]135-tristan back . ”[0-i] “ Okay . ”[0-i] [I]0-i hang up and begin to pace . . . where are [you]135-tristan ? Moments later [Tristan]135-tristan calls back . “ [He]126-jameson ’s not answering . [I]135-tristan ’ll come over . ”[135-tristan] “ Thank [you]135-tristan . ”[135-tristan] An hour later [Tristan]135-tristan and [I]0-i walk through [Bryant Park]57-bryant park . [We]2281-we have n’t talked other than about finding [Jameson]126-jameson . [He]135-tristan ’s angry with [me]0-i about [Jake]158-jay and obviously does n’t want to discuss it . [I]0-i ’m angry with [me]0-i . It ’s one o’clock in the morning , and now [I]0-i ’m getting frantic . [My]0-i eyes roam over [the park]4398-the park in the darkness . “ Where could [he]126-jameson be ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [I]135-tristan do n’t know . Try calling [him]126-jameson again , ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan says . [I]0-i dial [his]135-tristan number and keep walking through [the darkened park]2283-the darkened park when [we]2281-we hear something . [Tristan]135-tristan ’s eyes widen , and [he]135-tristan holds up [his]135-tristan hand . “ Shh , listen . ”[135-tristan] From the darkness , [we]2281-we can hear a faint ringtone . It goes silent , and [I]0-i redial [his]135-tristan number . [We]2281-we both look around frantically , and then [we]2281-we see the white glow as the screen lights up . “ Here . ”[0-i] [I]0-i run over to the side and see a phone lying in the grass . [My]0-i eyes widen in horror as [Tristan]135-tristan picks it up . [He]135-tristan swipes it on and puts in the code , and the screen lights up . [His]135-tristan eyes rise to meet [mine]0-i . “ It ’s [Jameson]126-jameson ’s phone . ”[135-tristan] [We]2281-we both look up across [the darkened park]2283-the darkened park as a sense of fear sweeps through [me]0-i . “ What the hell has happened to [him]126-jameson ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . It ’s four o’clock in the morning , and [Tristan]135-tristan and [I]0-i are frantic . [We]2281-we ’ve walked for hours . [Alan]152-alan , [Elliot]155-elliot , and [Christopher]156-christopher are all out looking for [Jameson]126-jameson . “ [He]126-jameson ’s probably just hiding out from [the police]421-the police somewhere . [He]126-jameson ’ll be fine , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan tries to comfort [me]0-i . [I]0-i ’m in full - blown tears now ; there ’s no hiding [my]0-i distress . “ This is all [my]0-i fault , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [we]2281-we walk . “ If [I]0-i did n’t go to that setup , none of this would have happened . ”[0-i] “ What do [you]135-tristan mean , setup ? ”[135-tristan] “ [Jake]158-jay told [me]0-i that [he]158-jay had information on a story that [Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara was publishing the next day about [Jameson]126-jameson and that [he]158-jay would tell [me]0-i out of work . [I]0-i did n’t want to worry [Jameson]126-jameson , so [I]0-i lied and went to meet [him]126-jameson . [He]126-jameson just wanted to get [me]0-i alone , and [he]126-jameson kissed [me]0-i . [I]0-i slapped [him]126-jameson across the face and left , and then the next day . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug . “ [You]2285-he saw the pictures . ”[0-i] [He]2285-he frowns . “ So [you]2285-he were n’t seeing [Jake]158-jay ? ”[2285-he] “ No , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ [I]0-i ’m in love with fucking [Jameson]126-jameson , [[you]2285-he idiot]998-you idiot . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sob . “ And [he]126-jameson wo n’t let [me]0-i explain . ”[0-i] “ Fucking hell , what a mess . ”[2285-he] [His]2285-he phone rings , and [he]2285-he quickly answers . “ Hello . ”[2285-he] [He]2285-he listens . “ Yes . ”[2285-he] [He]2285-he listens some more . “ Is [he]126-jameson all right ? ”[2285-he] [He]2285-he gasps . [He]2285-he puts [his]2285-he hand over [his]2285-he chest . “ Thank [God]88-god . ”[2285-he] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i mouth . “ Thank [you]2285-he . [I]0-i ’m on [my]0-i way . ”[0-i] [He]2285-he hangs up . “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [Jameson]126-jameson is in [the hospital]1612-the hospital . ”[0-i] “ What happened ? ”[2285-he] “ [He]126-jameson was hit by [a car]1671-a car . ”[0-i] [My]0-i hands fly over [my]0-i mouth in horror . “ [He]126-jameson ’s okay — just a concussion . ”[0-i] “ Oh , thank [God]88-god . ”[2285-he] “ [I]2285-he ’m going to go get [him]126-jameson . ”[2285-he] “ [I]2285-he ’m coming , ”[2285-he] [I]0-i demand . “ [Em]2285-he . . . ”[2285-he] [He]2285-he pauses . “ [I]2285-he do n’t think that ’s a good idea . [The paps]4415-the paps will be everywhere after this Ferrara bullshit , and [Jameson]126-jameson does n’t need more publicity . Who knows what [reporters]3195-reporters are at [the hospital]1612-the hospital ? [Jameson]126-jameson specifically wants [you]0-i kept out of the spotlight . Let [me]2285-he talk to [him]126-jameson , and [I]2285-he ’ll call [you]0-i when [we]4418-we get [home]3076-home . ”[2285-he] Hope blooms in [my]0-i chest . Is [he]2285-he trying to protect [me]0-i ? “ But [I]210-empathy did n’t do anything wrong , [Tristan]135-tristan . [I]210-empathy want to see [him]126-jameson . ”[210-empathy] [Empathy]210-empathy wins , and [he]2285-he takes [me]0-i in [his]2285-he arms . “ Let [me]2285-he get [him]126-jameson [home]3076-home safely , and [I]2285-he ’ll call [you]0-i . ”[2285-he] [He]2285-he pulls back and holds [me]0-i by the arms as [he]2285-he studies [me]0-i . “ [I]2285-he promise [I]2285-he ’ll call [you]0-i . [I]2285-he ’ll drop [you]0-i [home]3076-home and then sort [him]126-jameson out , and then [I]2285-he ’ll call [you]0-i . [You]0-i have [my]2285-he word . ”[2285-he] [His]2285-he eyes search [mine]0-i . “ Okay . ”[2285-he] [We]2286-we walk for a moment in silence . “ [I]0-i ’m going to find out who stole the money if it ’s the last thing [I]0-i do , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [Emily]91-emily , that ’s a bad idea . Leave it to [the detectives]4422-the detectives . [You]91-emily ’re tired and emotional . Let ’s get [you]91-emily [home]3076-home . ”[0-i] [I]0-i nod , knowing that [he]2285-he is right about everything and hating it even more . [Jameson]126-jameson [I]0-i watch [the nurse]1615-the nurse take [my]0-i pulse as [she]1615-the nurse holds [my]0-i hand , and [I]0-i inhale deeply . [She]1615-the nurse ’s older and motherly , the kind [you]0-i want looking after [you]0-i . “ How ’s the headache ? ”[1615-the nurse] [she]1615-the nurse asks . “ Still there . ”[1615-the nurse] [She]1615-the nurse smiles and gets [her]1615-the nurse flashlight and shines it in [my]0-i eyes to inspect [my]0-i pupils . “ [You]0-i have a serious concussion . [You]0-i ’re very lucky to be alive , [young man]4424-young man . ”[1615-the nurse] [I]0-i hear chatter from outside , and [Tristan]135-tristan appears at the door . “ Hey . ”[135-tristan] “ Hi . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk at the worry on [his]135-tristan face . [He]135-tristan rushes to [my]0-i side . “ Are [you]0-i all right ? ”[135-tristan] “ [I]135-tristan ’m fine . ”[135-tristan] “ [He]135-tristan is not fine , ”[1615-the nurse] [the nurse]1615-the nurse interrupts . “ [He]135-tristan got hit by [a car]1671-a car . [He]135-tristan could have been killed . As it is , [he]135-tristan has a very serious concussion . ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan drags [his]135-tristan hand down [his]135-tristan face . “ [Jesus]150-jesus . ”[135-tristan] “ [He]135-tristan ’s staying in for the night , and as long as all [his]135-tristan preliminary tests come back clear in the morning , [he]135-tristan can go [home]3076-home . ”[1615-the nurse] “ Okay . . . thanks . ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan slumps into a seat beside the bed . “ [I]1615-the nurse ’ll be back in an hour with some pain medication . ”[1615-the nurse] [She]1615-the nurse smiles . “ [I]0-i do n’t need it , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply . “ [I]0-i ’ll be back anyway . ”[0-i] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes , and [she]1615-the nurse leaves [us]2289-we alone . “ Sorry , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Fucking hell , [Jay]158-jay , [we]2289-we ’ve been out of [our]2289-we head with worry . Searching for [you]158-jay all night . ”[0-i] [I]0-i puff air into [my]0-i cheeks . “ [The police]421-the police came to [Emily]91-emily ’s , and then [she]91-emily called [me]0-i , and then [we]2289-we found [your]158-jay phone in [Bryant Park]57-bryant park . ”[0-i] “ [Emily]91-emily ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ Why did [you]0-i involve [her]91-emily ? ”[0-i] “ [She]91-emily ’s frantic , [Jameson]126-jameson . [She]91-emily wanted to help find [you]126-jameson . ”[0-i] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . “ [I]0-i seriously doubt that . ”[0-i] “ [You]126-jameson know , [I]0-i do n’t think [she]91-emily is on with that fuckwit [Jake]158-jay . This was a misunderstanding . ”[0-i] “ Shut up , ”[0-i] [I]0-i dismiss [him]2290-you . “ No . [You]2290-you shut up . Why wo n’t [you]2290-you even talk to [her]91-emily ? ”[0-i] “ Because [she]91-emily lied to [me]2290-you . Straight to [my]2290-you face about seeing [another man]630-another man . ”[2290-you] [He]2290-you watches [me]0-i . “ And [I]2290-you do n’t need that fucking shit in [my]2290-you life . [I]2290-you have enough going on , if [you]2290-you did n’t notice . ”[2290-you] “ [She]91-emily wants to see [you]0-i . ”[0-i] “ Yeah , well , [I]0-i do n’t want to see [her]91-emily , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ Then [you]2290-you need to end it with [her]91-emily ; [she]91-emily ’s frantic . ”[0-i] [I]0-i screw up [my]0-i face in annoyance . “ Just fucking go [home]3076-home . [I]0-i ’ll get [Alan]152-alan to pick [me]0-i up tomorrow . ”[0-i] “ Why wo n’t [you]2290-you even talk about this ? ”[1615-the nurse] “ Because this is none of [your]2290-you business . [Emily]91-emily and [I]1615-the nurse are over . It was over the moment [she]91-emily started lying to [me]1615-the nurse . ”[1615-the nurse] [The nurse]1615-the nurse reappears . “ [I]0-i ’m tired , ”[0-i] [I]0-i announce . [She]1615-the nurse smiles . “ Yes , okay . ”[1615-the nurse] [She]1615-the nurse turns [her]1615-the nurse attention to [Tristan]135-tristan . “ [We]4430-we will call [you]135-tristan in the morning when [he]135-tristan ’s ready for release . ”[1615-the nurse] “ Yeah , okay , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan replies . [His]135-tristan eyes hold [mine]0-i , and [I]0-i know that [he]135-tristan knows [I]0-i ’m not tired at all . [The nurse]1615-the nurse goes into [the bathroom]328-the bathroom . “ And what am [I]135-tristan supposed to tell [Emily]91-emily ? [She]91-emily ’s waiting for [my]135-tristan call , ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan whispers angrily . “ [I]135-tristan do n’t give a fuck what [you]0-i tell [her]91-emily — [she]91-emily ’s not [my]135-tristan problem . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan drags [his]135-tristan hand down [his]135-tristan face . “ [You]0-i ’re [a selfish son of a bitch]4431-a selfish son of a bitch sometimes . ”[135-tristan] “ And [your]0-i point is ? ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan stares at [me]0-i for an extended time . “ See [you]0-i tomorrow . ”[135-tristan] [Emily]91-emily [My]0-i phone dances across the coffee table , and [I]0-i pick it up in a rush . “ [He]135-tristan ’s okay . ”[0-i] [Tristan]135-tristan sighs . “ Thank [God]88-god . ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes in relief . “ Can [I]0-i see [him]135-tristan ? ”[0-i] “ [He]135-tristan has a bad concussion and is going to be in [the hospital]1612-the hospital for a few days . ”[0-i] “ What ? ”[0-i] “ [He]135-tristan said it ’s best that [you]0-i do n’t come down ; [he]135-tristan does n’t want the media circus . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes fill with tears . Damn it . It feels like all [I]0-i do is cry at the moment . “ [He]135-tristan ’s sleeping now . ”[0-i] “ Did [he]135-tristan say anything ? About [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause as [I]0-i try to articulate [my]0-i thoughts . “ How do [I]0-i get through to [him]135-tristan , [Tristan]135-tristan ? ”[0-i] [He]2294-i exhales heavily . “ [I]2294-i do n’t know . [He]135-tristan ’s got a lot of shit going on , [Em]91-emily . [I]2294-i do n’t think [he]135-tristan ’s thinking straight at the moment . [I]2294-i ’ll try and talk to [him]135-tristan tomorrow . ”[2294-i] [I]0-i screw up [my]0-i face in tears . “ Okay , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Can [you]2294-i call [me]0-i . . . please ? ”[0-i] [God]88-god , [I]0-i sound like [the world ’s biggest loser]1036-the world ’s biggest loser , but [I]0-i do n’t know what else to do . “ [I]0-i ’m so worried about [him]135-tristan , [Tristan]135-tristan . ”[0-i] “ [We]4433-we all are , [Em]91-emily . [I]0-i ’ll call [you]91-emily tomorrow . Just try and get some sleep . ”[0-i] “ Okay , good night . ”[0-i] [I]0-i hang up and get into the shower , and tears of relief begin to fall . At least [he]2296-he ’s okay , and tomorrow is another day . [He]2296-he will come back to [me]0-i . [I]0-i know [he]2296-he will . [I]0-i slide down in [my]0-i chair as [I]0-i peer across [the street]654-the street . [I]0-i ’m on [Operation Spies Like [Us]2298-us]58-operation spies like us . [Hayden]113-hayden is [my]0-i stalking subject . [I]0-i do n’t know why , but [I]0-i ca n’t let this go with [him]113-hayden . [I]0-i called in sick to work . [I]0-i figure this story may be the most important story of [my]0-i entire career to crack . [I]0-i still have n’t spoken to [Jameson]126-jameson , and with every day that passes , [I]0-i lose a little more hope . It ’s seven o’clock in the evening . [I]0-i ’m wearing a blonde wig and dark glasses , and [I]0-i have even rented [a car]1671-a car . [I]0-i ’ve been sitting [here]275-here for eight hours , with no sign of stupid [Hayden]113-hayden . [He]113-hayden lives in [a busy part of [town]3306-town]2301-a busy part of town in [a nice apartment block]2303-a nice apartment block ; [the street]654-the street is bustling , and [people]267-people are everywhere . [I]0-i have to concentrate on not missing anything . Damn it , come out already . [I]0-i ’ve eaten all [my]0-i snacks . [I]0-i ’m hungry and dying to go to [the bathroom]328-the bathroom , but damn it , [I]0-i want a lead or something . . . anything . . . throw [me]0-i a bone here . [I]0-i look down [the darkened street]2307-the darkened street and back up the other way . [God]88-god , [Hayden]113-hayden ’s probably on [his]113-hayden way to [Istanbul]59-istanbul by now . That ’s what [I]0-i would do if [I]0-i got fired from [my]0-i job for stealing . Although apparently , [he]113-hayden has no idea [he]113-hayden ’s still being investigated . [He]113-hayden thinks being fired is as far as it ’s going to go . [I]0-i lie back in the chair and let out a deflated breath . [I]0-i glance over [my]0-i shoulder and see [Hayden]113-hayden stopped and talking to [a woman on the sidewalk]2308-a woman on the sidewalk . Shit . [I]0-i scoot down in the chair . [They]2309-they must be getting back from somewhere . [They]2309-they seem to be deep in a serious conversation , and [she]2308-a woman on the sidewalk has a large bag over [her]2308-a woman on the sidewalk shoulder . [I]0-i take out [my]0-i phone and snap a picture of [the two of [them]2309-they]3259-the two of them . [I]0-i zoom in and take a few shots . Who is [she]2308-a woman on the sidewalk ? Is that [[his]113-hayden girlfriend]3264-his girlfriend ? [I]0-i text [Aaron]110-aaron and [Molly]111-molly in a group chat and send [them]2309-they the picture . Do [you]110-aaron know [this girl]3375-this girl ? [I]0-i keep watching as [they]2309-they continue to talk . For five minutes , [I]0-i watch [them]2309-they , and then [Molly]111-molly texts back . [I]0-i ’ve seen [her]3375-this girl before , but [I]0-i do n’t know where from ? Does [she]3375-this girl work in a café or something ? ? Hmm . [I]0-i text back . [I]0-i have no idea ? A text comes back from [Aaron]110-aaron . Yes , [she]3375-this girl used to work for [Miles Media]12-miles media . [My]0-i eyes widen , and [I]0-i text back . How long ago ? [He]110-aaron writes back . No idea , [I]0-i have n’t seen [her]3375-this girl for a while though . Shit . [I]0-i send the photo to [Tristan]135-tristan and text [him]135-tristan . [Tristan]135-tristan , [this girl]3375-this girl apparently worked for [Miles Media]12-miles media , can [you]135-tristan find out who [she]3375-this girl is from HR , please ? A reply immediately bounces back . Sure thing , are [you]135-tristan okay ? [I]0-i reply . Yes , [I]0-i ’m on operation stakeout . [He]135-tristan texts back . Do [you]135-tristan want [me]0-i to come and help [you]135-tristan ? [I]0-i smirk . [I]0-i thought [you]135-tristan thought this was a bad idea . [He]135-tristan replies . [I]0-i do , [I]0-i do n’t want [you]135-tristan in danger . [I]0-i text back . No , can [you]135-tristan just text [HR]115-hr for [me]0-i now , please ? [He]135-tristan replies . Ok . [I]0-i wait and wait and wait , and finally a text comes back . [Her]2314-her name is [Lara Aspin]145-lara aspin . [HR]115-hr are searching for [her]2314-her job title in the morning , [I]0-i ’ll keep [you]135-tristan posted . [I]0-i smile , excited that [I]0-i at least have a little lead . [I]0-i have no idea what it means , but [I]0-i guess it ’s something . [I]0-i text back . Thanks . [I]0-i check [my]0-i phone . . . no missed calls . [I]0-i turn [the car]422-the car on and pull out into the traffic , and a sense of dread begins to hang over [me]0-i . Nighttime is the worst ; [[my]0-i bed]2316-my bed without [Jameson]126-jameson is cold . There ’s [a void where [he]126-jameson ’s supposed to be]2317-a void where he ’s supposed to be . [My]0-i heart is aching . [I]0-i ’m losing hope for [us]2318-us . . . [I]0-i miss [him]126-jameson . [I]0-i lie on the couch and stare at the television . The cushion beneath [my]0-i head is wet with tears . It ’s been three days since [Jameson]126-jameson was hit by [a car]1671-a car . Six days since [I]0-i ’ve seen [him]126-jameson . . . [I]0-i ca n’t eat . [I]0-i ca n’t sleep . [I]0-i ’m in hell . To make matters worse , [I]0-i embarrassed [myself]0-i last night by going to [[his]126-jameson apartment]3362-his apartment and crying into the security camera , begging for [him]126-jameson to let [me]0-i in . [He]126-jameson did n’t , and after half an hour [[his]126-jameson doorman]2321-his doorman ushered [me]0-i out of [the building]412-the building . [I]0-i ’m ashamed . [I]0-i do n’t know what to do . . . [he]126-jameson wo n’t see [me]0-i ; [he]126-jameson wo n’t speak to [me]0-i . All the love and laughter [we]2323-we shared , reduced to nothing . It ’s like [I]0-i never meant anything to [him]126-jameson . . . maybe [I]0-i did n’t ? [I]0-i knew [he]126-jameson had a reputation for being cold , but this . . . this coldness is next level . How could [he]126-jameson watch [me]0-i on camera sob and beg and not even let [me]0-i in ? [I]0-i pick up [my]0-i phone and text [him]126-jameson . [I]0-i miss [you]126-jameson . [I]0-i stare at [my]0-i phone , and then [I]0-i see the dots . [I]0-i sit up . . . [he]126-jameson ’s typing something . [My]0-i heart begins to race . This is the first time . [I]0-i watch the dots roll as [I]0-i wait . . . and then [they]2324-they stop . Wait . . . what ? Where is the text ? [I]0-i wait . The dots start again , and [I]0-i smile through tears . . . yes . [He]126-jameson ’s replying . [I]0-i wait and wait . Then the dots stop once more . “ Send the text , damn it , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . [I]0-i wait , and nothing comes through for half an hour . [My]0-i anger starts to bubble . How dare [he]126-jameson not even acknowledge [me]0-i ? Who the fuck does [this asshole]600-this asshole think [he]126-jameson is ? [I]0-i angrily text back . At least have the guts to say what [you]2326-you want to . A text immediately bounces back . Move on , [I]0-i have . [I]0-i read the message and then read the message again through tears . . . what ? Just like that . . . move on ? Fucking asshole . [I]0-i get up and throw [my]0-i phone as hard as [I]0-i can . The screen smashes on the coffee table . [I]0-i ’m so fucking furious that [I]0-i have absolutely no control of the situation . [I]0-i storm into [the bathroom]328-the bathroom , [I]0-i get under the shower , and , unable to help it , [I]0-i cry . . . and cry . . . and cry . Howling sobs , and [my]0-i chest is heaving hard as [I]0-i hold [myself]0-i up against the tiles . Tears of anger , tears of frustration , tears of heartbreak . [I]0-i knew it was coming . . . deep down , all along , [I]0-i knew it was coming , but holy fuck . . . it hurts . [Jameson]126-jameson [I]0-i drop [my]0-i shoulders in the back of [[my]0-i limo]949-my limo as [I]0-i steel [myself]0-i for what [I]0-i ’m about to do . “ Are [you]0-i sure about this ? ”[152-alan] [Alan]152-alan asks as [he]152-alan opens the door . “ Yes . It is what it is ; [I]0-i ’m not hiding any longer , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say as [I]0-i climb out of [the car]422-the car . [I]0-i look up at the [New York Police Department]2330-new york police department sign above the door , and [I]0-i walk through . [The policeman at the front desk]2331-the policeman at the front desk smiles . “ Can [I]2331-the policeman at the front desk help [you]0-i , [sir]3064-sir ? ”[2331-the policeman at the front desk] “ Yes , [my]2276-the policeman name is [Jameson Miles]126-jameson , and [I]2276-the policeman would like to hand [myself]2276-the policeman in . ”[2276-the policeman] [The policeman]2276-the policeman ’s face falters . “ [You]0-i are wanted ? ”[2276-the policeman] “ [I]2276-the policeman was involved in a fistfight with [a man named [Gabriel Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara]4435-a man named gabriel ferrara and then went to [the hospital]1612-the hospital . [I]2276-the policeman was unaware until late last night that [you]2276-the policeman were looking for [me]2276-the policeman . [My]2276-the policeman apologies for taking so long to get [here]275-here . ”[2276-the policeman] [The policeman]2276-the policeman smiles . “ Thank [you]0-i for coming in . ”[2276-the policeman] [He]2276-the policeman opens a door at the side of reception . “ Please come this way . ”[2276-the policeman] Five hours later , [I]0-i stand on [the pavement outside [the Ferrara building]2335-the ferrara building]2334-the pavement outside the ferrara building and look up to [the top floors]2210-the top floors . [I]0-i dial a number that [I]0-i ’ve had for years but have never called . “ [Gabriel Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara , ”[0-i] the deep voice answers . “ It ’s [Jameson Miles]126-jameson . [I]0-i ’m out in front of [[your]0-i building]4438-your building . Get down here now . ”[0-i] [I]0-i hang up and inhale deeply . [I]0-i lean [my]0-i behind on [[my]0-i limo]949-my limo . After having spent the last five hours in [the police station]3408-the police station , [I]0-i am not in the mood to wait for this prick , but [I]0-i need to say what [I]0-i need to say , or it ’s going to keep festering inside of [me]0-i . [I]0-i told [the police]421-the police that [my]0-i punch on [Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara was self - defense and that [they]421-the police need to check the security footage . [I]0-i ’m not sure if it will stick , but it will give [me]0-i some time . [The police]421-the police were actually okay and told [me]0-i that seeing [he]196-gabriel ferrara flicked the cigar at [me]0-i first , [I]0-i will probably only be charged with common assault and given a good behavior bond . That , [I]0-i can deal with . [Gabriel Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara appears through the front door , flanked by [four security guards]2341-four security guards . [His]196-gabriel ferrara eye is black and [his]196-gabriel ferrara cheekbone swollen . [I]0-i smirk as [I]0-i see [his]196-gabriel ferrara fucked - up face . “ [You]196-gabriel ferrara look like shit . ”[0-i] “ Yeah , well , [a madman]4439-a madman attacked [me]196-gabriel ferrara , ”[196-gabriel ferrara] [he]196-gabriel ferrara mutters dryly . [I]0-i step forward as [my]0-i anger resurfaces . “ [I]196-gabriel ferrara know what [you]196-gabriel ferrara ’re doing . ”[196-gabriel ferrara] [He]196-gabriel ferrara glares at [me]0-i . “ [You]0-i do n’t scare [me]196-gabriel ferrara . It ’s laughable how underhanded [you]0-i have become . ”[196-gabriel ferrara] [He]196-gabriel ferrara rolls [his]196-gabriel ferrara eyes . “ Fuck off , [Miles]126-jameson . ”[196-gabriel ferrara] “ If [you]196-gabriel ferrara think that underhanded criminal behavior can take down [Miles Media]103-miles media , [you]196-gabriel ferrara can think again , ”[0-i] [I]0-i sneer . [He]196-gabriel ferrara narrows [his]196-gabriel ferrara eyes . “ [Miles Media]103-miles media has been the market leader for thirty years , and [we]4440-we will continue to dominate . Tell [me]196-gabriel ferrara , does [[your]0-i father]4441-your father know what [you]0-i ’ve stooped to ? ”[196-gabriel ferrara] [He]196-gabriel ferrara lifts [his]196-gabriel ferrara chin in defiance . “ Criminal behavior — what the hell are [you]0-i talking about ? That hit and run has left [you]0-i delusional . ”[196-gabriel ferrara] “ [You]0-i know exactly what [I]2342-i ’m talking about . ”[2342-i] [We]2342-i glare at [each other]351-each other ; hate hangs in the air like poisonous pollution . “ [I]0-i know what [you]196-gabriel ferrara ’re doing , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [His]196-gabriel ferrara eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ And as soon as [I]196-gabriel ferrara prove it , [I]196-gabriel ferrara ’m going to fry [your]196-gabriel ferrara fucking ass in [court]4442-court . ”[196-gabriel ferrara] “ [I]196-gabriel ferrara ’d like to see [you]196-gabriel ferrara try . ”[196-gabriel ferrara] [I]0-i stare at [him]196-gabriel ferrara as [I]0-i remember how good it felt to hit [this fucker]2344-this fucker . “ Is [your]196-gabriel ferrara cheekbone broken ? ”[196-gabriel ferrara] [He]196-gabriel ferrara glares at [me]0-i , and [I]0-i know it is . “ Let [me]196-gabriel ferrara tell [you]196-gabriel ferrara this — disrespect [Emily Foster]91-emily again , and next time . . . [I]196-gabriel ferrara wo n’t just break [your]196-gabriel ferrara cheekbone . [I]196-gabriel ferrara will kill [you]196-gabriel ferrara , ”[196-gabriel ferrara] [I]0-i sneer . [He]196-gabriel ferrara raises [his]196-gabriel ferrara eyebrow as if surprised by [my]0-i statement . “ Is that a threat , [Miles]103-miles media ? ”[196-gabriel ferrara] “ That ’s a fucking promise , ”[0-i] [I]0-i growl . “ Leave [her]4443-her out of this . ”[0-i] [I]0-i turn and get into [[my]0-i limo]949-my limo , and [we]2346-we pull away . [I]0-i watch [Gabriel Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara storm back into [the building]412-the building , flanked by [[his]196-gabriel ferrara security]2348-his security . The day [I]0-i bring [that asshole]2349-that asshole down is going to be a sweet victory . [I]0-i run down [the street]654-the street in the dark . It ’s just midnight . [I]0-i have n’t been [here]275-here in a while , and for some reason , tonight [I]0-i need to be . [[Emily]91-emily ’s apartment building]2352-emily ’s apartment building . [I]0-i count the windows until [I]0-i get to [[her]91-emily apartment]2353-her apartment , and [I]0-i stare up at [it]2353-her apartment . What ’s [she]91-emily doing ? Is [she]91-emily missing [me]0-i as much as [I]0-i ’m missing [her]91-emily ? [I]0-i get a vision of ringing the doorbell and asking to come up , and [we]2354-we would hug , and [I]0-i would feel happy . . . like [I]0-i used to . But then [I]0-i remember the hurt [I]0-i felt last week when [she]91-emily lied to [me]0-i , the out - of - control feeling that [I]0-i have whenever [I]0-i ’m with [her]91-emily . The way [[my]0-i enemies]2355-my enemies are using [her]91-emily to get to [me]0-i , the way [she]91-emily ’s handing [them]2355-my enemies the ammunition like candy . And [I]0-i know that nothing could bring [me]0-i undone . . . except [her]91-emily . [She]91-emily ’s [my]0-i only weakness . And weakness is something that [I]0-i ca n’t afford to have . Not now , not ever . [I]0-i stare up at [[her]91-emily apartment]2353-her apartment for a long time , and then with a heavy heart , [I]0-i turn and begin the depressing run [home]3076-home . [I]0-i ’ve never been so alone . [Emily]91-emily [I]0-i stare at the coffee in front of [me]0-i ; the thought of drinking it turns [my]0-i stomach . It ’s been four days since [I]0-i got the dreaded four - word text from [Jameson]126-jameson . Move on , [I]0-i have . Four days is a long time to walk around with a broken heart . . . it ’s weak and barely clinging to life . [I]0-i keep hoping and praying that [he]126-jameson ’s going to come back with a grand gesture and hold [his]126-jameson arms out , and [I]0-i run into [them]2358-them , and this nightmare will all be forgotten . If only that were true . [My]0-i mind is clouded with memories of [the man [I]0-i thought [I]0-i knew]2359-the man i thought i knew . The hole in [my]0-i life seems so large , and [I]0-i just do n’t understand how [you]2360-you can fall so hard in love with [someone]401-someone in such a short period of time . [I]0-i should have stayed with [Robbie]106-robbie , because in hindsight , [Robbie]106-robbie was safe . There was never a chance of [him]106-robbie hurting [me]0-i this deeply . . . but then , [I]0-i would n’t have met [Jameson]126-jameson and found out what it was like to have this all - consuming love inside of [me]0-i . No matter how it ended , [I]0-i would n’t trade that feeling for anything . Even if it was only [mine]0-i for just a little while . The only thing keeping [me]0-i going at the moment is [Molly]111-molly and [Aaron]110-aaron . [They]2362-they ’ve been wonderful . Cheering [me]0-i on from the sidelines , reminding [me]0-i of why [I]0-i came to [New York]3-new york in the first place . It would be so easy to run [home]3076-home right now with [my]0-i tail between [my]0-i legs . “ Are [you]0-i going to eat the rest of that ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly gestures to [my]0-i half - eaten sandwich . [I]0-i crinkle up [my]0-i nose . “ No , do [you]111-molly want it ? ”[0-i] “ Just forget [you]0-i ever met [him]110-aaron , [Em]91-emily . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron sighs . “ [No man]4444-no man is worth this heartache . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i force out a weak smile . “ [He]110-aaron ’ll come back , [Aaron]110-aaron . [I]110-aaron know [he]110-aaron will . ”[110-aaron] “ [You]0-i know [you]0-i keep saying that , [Em]91-emily , but where is [the fucking asshole]1033-the fucking asshole ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly replies . “ [He]110-aaron ’s just . . . ”[111-molly] [I]0-i shrug as [I]0-i try to articulate [my]0-i thoughts . “ Lost at the moment . ”[111-molly] “ No , what [he]110-aaron is is [a self - absorbed fucking asshole]4446-a self - absorbed fucking asshole , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly huffs . “ Good riddance , [I]111-molly say ; [you]91-emily dodged a bullet . ”[111-molly] There is absolutely no love lost between [Aaron]110-aaron and [Molly]111-molly as far as [Jameson]126-jameson is concerned . “ Maybe . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh sadly . “ Come on ; [we]2364-we have to get back . ”[0-i] [Aaron]110-aaron stands . “ Lunch break is over . ”[110-aaron] [We]2364-we make [our]2364-we way back out onto [the street]654-the street and are walking toward [the Miles Media building]624-the miles media building when [Molly]111-molly stops on the spot . “ Fuck , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly whispers . “ What ? ”[111-molly] “ Look . ”[2364-we] [We]2364-we all glance up and see [Jameson]126-jameson walking down toward [us]2364-we with [a woman]381-a woman . [He]126-jameson ’s in [his]126-jameson customary navy suit and looking all immaculate , and [they]2368-they are deep in conversation . “ [He]126-jameson ’s at work today ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson . [I]0-i did n’t even know [he]126-jameson came back to work yet . [He]126-jameson has n’t seen [us]2364-we and is talking as [he]126-jameson walks . “ Who ’s [the woman]1836-the woman ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . [She]381-a woman looks familiar , but [I]0-i ca n’t place [her]381-a woman . [Molly]111-molly grabs [my]0-i arm with a sense of urgency . “ Come on ; let ’s go this way . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly tries to pull [me]0-i into [a shop]3103-a shop . “ Who ’s [the woman]1836-the woman ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i repeat as [they]2370-they get closer . “ [Claudia Mason]122-claudia . ”[0-i] The air leaves [my]0-i lungs . . . [[his]126-jameson ex]1731-his ex . [He]126-jameson ’s with [[his]126-jameson ex]1731-his ex ? [I]0-i begin to hear [my]0-i heartbeat in [my]0-i ears as the ground sways beneath [me]0-i . “ Let ’s go ; [we]2373-us do n’t want [him]126-jameson to see [us]2373-us , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly urges as [she]111-molly grabs [my]0-i arm once more . [I]0-i pull out of [her]111-molly grip and stand strong . As [he]126-jameson gets to [us]2373-us , [he]126-jameson glances up and sees [me]0-i . [His]126-jameson step falters , and then [he]126-jameson clenches [his]126-jameson jaw and does n’t make eye contact . Tears well in [my]0-i eyes as [I]0-i watch [him]126-jameson walk past . [He]126-jameson stops with [his]126-jameson back to [me]0-i , and [I]0-i hold [my]0-i breath . Turn around . . . turn around . After a moment , [he]126-jameson falls back into stride beside [the woman]1836-the woman and disappears up [the street]654-the street without looking back . A searing pain lurches through [my]0-i chest as [I]0-i fight tears . [I]0-i drop [my]0-i head in sadness . There ’s [my]0-i answer . That ’s it . . . [we]2376-we ’re done . It ’s Friday night , and [I]0-i slide down in the seat of [[my]0-i rental car]2377-my rental car as [I]0-i peer across [the darkened street]2307-the darkened street . [I]0-i ’ve completely throw [myself]0-i into solving the case , if not for any reason other than to distract [me]0-i . [I]0-i ’m outside [[Hayden]113-hayden ’s apartment]2379-hayden ’s apartment , and [I]0-i know that [I]0-i ’m probably clutching at straws by being [here]275-here , but what else am [I]0-i going to do ? Crying and staring at the wall is getting old . A text comes through on [my]0-i phone , and [I]0-i glance down and see the letter J. [I]0-i read the text and nearly drop the phone in shock . One last stop over . [JFK Airport]60-jfk airport . Sat , 8 pm . [JFK Clubhouse Bar]61-jfk clubhouse bar . [I]0-i need to see [you]2381-you . J xxx [I]0-i sit up . What ? [He]2382-he needs to see [me]0-i . . . [he]2382-he needs to see [me]0-i ? Hope blooms in [my]0-i chest . Oh [my]0-i God . [I]0-i immediately call [Molly]111-molly . “ Hello , ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly answers . “ [Jameson]126-jameson just texted [me]111-molly . [He]2382-he wants to meet tomorrow night ! ”[111-molly] [I]0-i blurt out in a rush . “ What ? ”[111-molly] [she]111-molly snaps . “ Did [you]0-i tell [him]2382-he to go fuck [himself]2382-he ? ”[111-molly] “ No . ”[0-i] “ Why not ? ”[111-molly] “ Because . ”[111-molly] [I]0-i try to think of a perfect explanation . “ Maybe seeing [Claudia]122-claudia snapped [him]2382-he out of this , and [I]111-molly want to see [him]2382-he too , [Moll]111-molly . This is what [I]111-molly ’ve been wanting all along . ”[111-molly] “ Oh God , can [you]0-i hear [yourself]0-i ? Why would [you]0-i want to see [him]2382-he ? [He]2382-he ’s been [a complete douchebag]4449-a complete douchebag . ”[111-molly] “ [I]2384-i know , but [he]2382-he ’s been under so much stress , [Molly]111-molly . [I]2384-i just need to talk to [him]2382-he . ”[2384-i] “ For the record , [I]2383-she think this is a bad idea . ”[2383-she] [She]2383-she sighs . [I]0-i smile . [She]2383-she ’s wrong . . . this is a great idea . [I]0-i text [him]2384-i back . See [you]2383-she there . x [I]0-i smile goofily out the windshield and look over to see [Hayden]113-hayden talking to [that same girl who used to work at [Miles Media]12-miles media]2385-that same girl who used to work at miles media . [Lara Aspin]145-lara aspin . . . something is up with [her]145-lara aspin too . [I]0-i want to know more about [her]145-lara aspin ; so far , [I]0-i ’ve been unable to dig up anything , not even an address . [She]145-lara aspin finishes [her]145-lara aspin conversation with [Hayden]113-hayden and begins to walk down [the street]654-the street . [My]0-i eyes flick between [her]145-lara aspin and [Hayden]113-hayden . Shit , what do [I]0-i do ? [I]0-i watch [Hayden]113-hayden disappear into [[his]113-hayden building]1421-his building . Well , [I]0-i already know where [Hayden]113-hayden lives . If [I]0-i let [her]145-lara aspin go , [I]0-i may never find [her]145-lara aspin again . [I]0-i really do need to know where [she]145-lara aspin lives . [I]0-i watch [her]145-lara aspin as [she]145-lara aspin walks down [the street]654-the street . Damn it . [I]0-i jump out of [the car]422-the car and cross [the street]654-the street and fall in behind [her]145-lara aspin on [the sidewalk]878-the sidewalk . [She]145-lara aspin walks down [the subway stairs]2392-the subway stairs , and [I]0-i hesitate . It ’s dark , and [God]88-god knows where [she]145-lara aspin ’s going . . . shit . [I]0-i watch [her]145-lara aspin disappear down [the stairs]2393-the stairs , and [I]0-i brace [myself]0-i . Damn it . [I]0-i have to follow [her]145-lara aspin . [We]2394-we wait on [the platform]2395-the platform for a while , and then [she]145-lara aspin gets onto [a train]2396-a train , and [I]0-i get on after [her]145-lara aspin . [I]0-i stand by the doors and stare out the window while [I]0-i keep [her]145-lara aspin in [my]0-i peripheral vision . Adrenaline is surging through [my]0-i body , and [I]0-i have to admit , this is actually kind of fun . [I]0-i should have been [a cop]2397-a cop . [We]2394-we go four stops , and then [she]145-lara aspin gets up and stands by the door . [The stop]2398-the stop is [Central Station]62-central station , and [I]0-i let out a sigh of relief — at least it ’s safe there . [We]2394-we get off [the train]2399-the train , and [I]0-i drop back so [she]145-lara aspin does n’t get suspicious . [We]2394-we walk , and [we]2394-we walk , and [we]2394-we walk . . . damn it , where is [she]145-lara aspin going ? [She]145-lara aspin disappears into [a crowd]2400-a crowd , and [I]0-i jump up to see if [I]0-i can see [her]145-lara aspin . [I]0-i walk farther , and [I]0-i ca n’t see [her]145-lara aspin . [She]145-lara aspin ’s disappeared into thin air . Damn it . [I]0-i turn and look back down [the street]654-the street [we]2394-we just came from . Where did [she]145-lara aspin go ? [I]0-i walk back a little way , and then [I]0-i catch sight of [her]145-lara aspin in [a shop]3103-a shop . Thank [God]88-god . [I]0-i duck in and then notice it ’s [a pawnshop]2403-a pawnshop . [I]0-i pretend to look at something in the back as [she]145-lara aspin talks to [the man on the desk]2404-the man on the desk . “ Well , it ’s not worth much , ”[2404-the man on the desk] [he]2404-the man on the desk says . “ [I]145-lara aspin would like five hundred dollars for it . It ’s in perfect working order , ”[145-lara aspin] [she]145-lara aspin replies . “ [You]0-i ’re dreaming . No way . ”[0-i] [I]0-i peer through a gap in a bookcase and see a MacBook . Shit . . . [she]145-lara aspin ’s selling [her]145-lara aspin computer . Why would [she]145-lara aspin be selling a computer ? [My]0-i mind begins to race as [the two of them]3259-the two of them haggle over the price . [The shop attendant]2406-the shop attendant wins in the end , and [he]2406-the shop attendant hands over two hundred dollars . [I]0-i watch [her]145-lara aspin disappear out the door , and [I]0-i wait for a moment and go to the desk . “ Hello . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile casually . “ Hey , ”[2407-the overweight pawnshop man] [the overweight pawnshop man]2407-the overweight pawnshop man mutters as [he]2407-the overweight pawnshop man counts [his]2407-the overweight pawnshop man till up . This may just be the craziest thing [I]0-i ’ve ever done , and [I]0-i ’ve done some pretty crazy things in [my]0-i life . “ [I]2407-the overweight pawnshop man would like to buy that computer , please . ”[2407-the overweight pawnshop man] [He]2407-the overweight pawnshop man frowns as [he]2407-the overweight pawnshop man glances up . “ What one ? ”[2407-the overweight pawnshop man] [I]0-i point to the one [she]145-lara aspin just sold [him]2407-the overweight pawnshop man . “ Nah , [I]0-i have n’t cleaned it up yet . Go to the cabinet on the left , and find another one . ”[0-i] “ No , it has to be that one . ”[2407-the overweight pawnshop man] “ Not for sale yet . Come back in two days . ”[0-i] If [I]0-i come back in two days , it will be wiped . “ Name [your]2407-the overweight pawnshop man price , ”[0-i] [I]0-i assert , feeling brave . [He]2407-the overweight pawnshop man stills , and [his]2407-the overweight pawnshop man eyes come to [mine]0-i . “ A thousand dollars . ”[2407-the overweight pawnshop man] [He]2407-the overweight pawnshop man raises an eyebrow in a silent dare . “ [You]2407-the overweight pawnshop man just paid two hundred for it — are [you]2407-the overweight pawnshop man crazy ? ”[2407-the overweight pawnshop man] [I]0-i stammer . [He]2407-the overweight pawnshop man shrugs and goes back to what [he]2407-the overweight pawnshop man ’s doing . [I]0-i stare at the computer on the desk , and [I]0-i do n’t know why , but [my]0-i gut is telling [me]0-i to buy it . “ Damn it , okay , fine . As it is , right now , for a thousand dollars . ”[2407-the overweight pawnshop man] [He]2407-the overweight pawnshop man smiles a slimy grin . “ Okay , [honey]4450-honey . ”[2407-the overweight pawnshop man] [I]0-i hand [him]2407-the overweight pawnshop man over [[my]0-i mother]403-my mother ’s credit card , the one [I]0-i have for emergencies . . . sorry , [Mom]105-mom . [I]0-i pay the thousand dollars and take the computer and walk out the front door . [My]0-i phone rings . [Tristan]135-tristan ’s name lights up the screen . Perfect timing . “ Hello , ”[0-i] [I]0-i answer . “ Sorry [I]2407-the overweight pawnshop man took so long to get back to [you]2407-the overweight pawnshop man . [That girl]3589-that girl ’s name is [Lara Aspin]145-lara aspin , and get this — [she]3589-that girl used to work in accounts , ”[2407-the overweight pawnshop man] [he]2407-the overweight pawnshop man blurts out . “ What does that mean ? ”[2407-the overweight pawnshop man] [I]0-i frown . “ [She]3589-that girl had access to the bank account details . ”[2407-the overweight pawnshop man] “ Oh my God , [Tristan]135-tristan , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i look around guiltily . “ [I]0-i just followed [her]3589-that girl on [the train]2399-the train , and [she]3589-that girl sold [her]3589-that girl computer to [a pawnshop]2403-a pawnshop , and [I]0-i know this is crazy , but [I]0-i just bought it for a thousand dollars . ”[0-i] “ What ? [You]135-tristan have it ? [You]135-tristan actually have [her]3589-that girl computer ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile proudly . “ Uh - huh . ”[0-i] “ Where are [you]135-tristan ? [I]0-i ’m coming to get [you]135-tristan now . ”[0-i] [I]0-i walk through [the airport]276-the airport with [my]0-i heart in [my]0-i throat . [I]0-i ’m pulling [my]0-i small carry - on suitcase so that [I]0-i look the part of [a tired traveler]2410-a tired traveler . . . or perhaps [I]0-i ’m just trying to pretend to [myself]0-i that this is n’t a bad idea . Because [I]0-i know it is ; deep in [my]0-i gut [I]0-i know that [I]0-i should n’t be playing this dangerous game with [him]2411-him . [I]0-i should be sitting down and having a civilized grown - up conversation . But desperation has brought out [my]0-i weakness , and [I]0-i ’m hoping that tonight [Jameson]126-jameson and [I]0-i can talk . . . and [he]2411-him can apologize and beg for [me]0-i to come back , and then [I]0-i can punish [him]2411-him , and [we]2412-we can begin to get back on track . [I]0-i have n’t seen [Claudia]122-claudia again , so [I]0-i have no idea what is going on with [her]122-claudia , but the fact that [Jameson]126-jameson wanted to see [me]0-i tonight tells [me]0-i that it ’s nothing . [I]0-i hope it ’s nothing . . . God , [I]0-i hope it ’s nothing . . . stop it . [I]0-i duck into [the bathroom]328-the bathroom to give [myself]0-i one last pep talk . [I]0-i reapply [my]0-i red lipstick , [Jameson]126-jameson ’s personal favorite , and [I]0-i stare at [my]0-i reflection in the mirror . [My]0-i long dark hair is out and wavy . [I]0-i wanted to wear a dress but did n’t want to seem too eager , so [I]0-i finally decided to wear black fitted capri pants and a black silk shirt with the top button strategically undone . [My]0-i black lace bra is just peeking through if [I]0-i move the right way . [I]0-i ’m wearing [his]126-jameson favorite fragrance and think [I]0-i look sexy without trying to be sexy . . . is that even a thing ? [God]88-god knows . [I]0-i guess [I]0-i ’ll soon find out . Do n’t be needy . . . do n’t be whiny . . . and do n’t be overdramatic , [I]0-i remind [myself]0-i . Be sexy and alluring . . . like [I]0-i was when [we]2414-we first met . Right , [I]0-i can do this . [I]0-i drop [my]0-i shoulders , take a deep breath , and steel [myself]0-i for the night ahead . This is literally a make - or - break situation . [I]0-i need to remind [him]126-jameson why [he]126-jameson fell in love with [me]0-i in the first place . . . how the hell has [he]126-jameson forgotten ? That in itself is an issue . . . [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes in disgust . Stop overthinking this . [I]0-i walk down [the corridor]728-the corridor and into [the Clubhouse Bar]2416-the clubhouse bar . [It]2416-the clubhouse bar ’s busy and bustling . [I]0-i walk in and take a seat in the corner at a bench - seat table for two . If [he]126-jameson wants to see [me]0-i , then [he]126-jameson can find [me]0-i . [I]0-i ’m on a stopover and totally oblivious to anything around [me]0-i . [I]0-i take out [my]0-i laptop and open [my]0-i emails . “ Can [I]867-the waiter get [you]0-i a drink ? ”[867-the waiter] [the waiter]867-the waiter asks as [he]867-the waiter approaches [my]0-i table . “ Yes , please . ”[867-the waiter] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i hand [him]126-jameson [my]0-i credit card . “ A top - shelf margarita , please . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson smiles and , with a cheeky wink , walks away . Damn it , that [Jameson Miles]126-jameson has spoiled [me]0-i . [I]0-i seem to have an addiction to top - shelf shit , and it just rolls off [my]0-i tongue a little too easy now . [I]0-i turn [my]0-i attention back to read [my]0-i emails and pretend that they ’re fascinating . [They]2418-they ’re not . And what [I]0-i really want to be doing is giving [this place]459-this place the once - over with an eagle eye . . . is [he]126-jameson here ? [The waiter]867-the waiter returns with [my]0-i drink . “ Here [you]0-i are , a top - shelf margarita . ”[867-the waiter] [He]867-the waiter places it down onto the table . “ And [the gentleman at the bar]4454-the gentleman at the bar asked that [I]867-the waiter deliver these to [you]0-i . ”[867-the waiter] [He]867-the waiter places a large bowl of strawberries and a dipping bowl of hot chocolate on the table . [My]0-i eyes rise to where [he]867-the waiter gestures , and [I]0-i see [Jameson]126-jameson sitting at [the bar]534-the bar . [He]126-jameson ’s wearing dark denim jeans and a white shirt that [I]0-i bought [him]126-jameson . [His]126-jameson dark hair is messed to perfection . [Our]2422-our eyes lock , and [he]126-jameson raises [his]126-jameson glass and then takes a sip . [My]0-i stomach rolls in excitement . [He]126-jameson has n’t looked at [me]0-i like that in a long time . “ Thank [you]867-the waiter , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply to [the waiter]867-the waiter , completely distracted by [the beautiful specimen at [the bar]534-the bar]2424-the beautiful specimen at the bar . [I]0-i sip [my]0-i margarita as [I]0-i try to keep the goofy smile from [my]0-i face , and [I]0-i turn back to [my]0-i emails to act uninterested . Strawberries with hot chocolate ; there ’s no way to eat them without slurping them up and looking like an animal . [I]0-i smirk . . . maybe that ’s what [he]126-jameson wants ? Game on . With [my]0-i eyes locked onto [my]0-i computer screen , [I]0-i pick up a strawberry and dip it into the hot chocolate and lick it and then place it seductively in [my]0-i mouth . [I]0-i suck the chocolate and rub it back and forth over [my]0-i lips . [I]0-i take a sip of [my]0-i margarita and then repeat the move . [I]0-i smile to [myself]0-i . . . what the actual hell am [I]0-i doing ? [I]0-i ’m in [an airport bar]2426-an airport bar when [I]0-i ’m not flying anywhere , pretending not to know [someone]401-someone while [he]126-jameson watches [me]0-i go down on a fucking strawberry . This really is beyond bizarre . If [Molly]111-molly and [Aaron]110-aaron could only see [me]0-i now . [The waiter]867-the waiter arrives with another margarita . “ Compliments from [[your]0-i friend]4455-your friend at [the bar]534-the bar . ”[867-the waiter] “ Thank [you]867-the waiter . ”[0-i] [I]0-i keep [my]0-i eyes down as [I]0-i play the game and refuse to look at [him]126-jameson . Ten minutes later , [I]0-i take the final sip of [my]0-i margarita and allow [my]0-i eyes to drift to [the man at [the bar]534-the bar]2429-the man at the bar ; [his]126-jameson dark eyes are on [me]0-i , and heat blazes between [us]2431-us . [I]0-i know that look . . . [I]0-i ’m going to fuck [you]2432-you . . . so damn good . [I]0-i feel [my]0-i arousal begin to thump , and with [my]0-i eyes locked on [his]126-jameson , [I]0-i pick up a strawberry and lick it . [He]126-jameson stands as if summoned by [my]0-i tongue . With [our]2431-us eyes locked , [I]0-i suck , and [he]126-jameson walks toward [my]0-i table . “ Mind if [I]126-jameson take a seat ? ”[126-jameson] [his]126-jameson deep , sexy voice purrs . “ Not at all . ”[126-jameson] [My]0-i eyes drop to the bulge in [his]126-jameson pants , and [I]0-i raise [my]0-i eyebrow . “ Do n’t judge . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson smiles as [he]126-jameson falls into the bench seat beside [me]0-i . “ [I]126-jameson just watched the best damn strawberry porn that [I]126-jameson ’ve ever seen . ”[126-jameson] “ Really ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk . [I]0-i feel the heat from [his]126-jameson close proximity , and [I]0-i have to fight not to lean toward [him]126-jameson . [He]126-jameson holds out [his]126-jameson hand . “ [I]126-jameson ’m [Jim]90-jim . ”[126-jameson] [My]0-i heart free - falls from [my]0-i chest , exactly like the first time . [I]0-i take [his]126-jameson hand , and electricity shoots up [my]0-i arm like an electric shock . “ Hi , [Jim]90-jim . [I]0-i ’m [Emily]91-emily . ”[0-i] So [we]2433-we ’re playing that game , are [we]2433-we ? Pretending [we]2433-we do n’t know [each other]351-each other . This really is like a stopover do - over . [I]0-i ’ll do whatever it takes to break the ice between [us]2433-we . With [his]126-jameson elbows resting on the table , [he]126-jameson steeples [his]126-jameson hands under [his]126-jameson chin . [His]126-jameson eyes dance with mischief . “ Where are [you]0-i flying to , [Emily]91-emily ? ”[126-jameson] “ [London]8-london . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sip [my]0-i drink . “ [You]0-i ? ”[0-i] “ [Dubai]63-dubai . [My]126-jameson flight ’s been delayed . ”[126-jameson] “ [Mine]126-jameson too . ”[0-i] With locked eyes , [we]2433-we both sip [our]2433-we drinks . The air is electric , and regardless of the love that [I]0-i have for [this man]327-this man , there is no denying that the sexual chemistry [we]2433-we have is out of [this world]1457-this world . “ Thanks for the drink . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile softly . “ [You]0-i ’re welcome . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson eyes are dark and hooded , and [I]0-i can feel [his]126-jameson arousal from here . “ What do [you]126-jameson do for a living ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [I]126-jameson ’m [a tour guide]4457-a tour guide , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson replies without hesitation . “ Really ? What kind of tours do [you]126-jameson run ? ”[126-jameson] “ Camping . ”[0-i] [I]0-i snort [my]0-i drink up [my]0-i nose as [I]0-i giggle . “ Oh . ”[0-i] [I]0-i cough . “ So . . . [you]126-jameson ’re [the outdoor type]4458-the outdoor type ? ”[0-i] “ Totally . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson sips [his]126-jameson margarita . “ [I]126-jameson ’m at one with nature . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson crosses [his]126-jameson two fingers to show [me]0-i just how close . [I]0-i try and fail to hide [my]0-i broad smile . “ That ’s good to know . [Cavemen]4459-cavemen are such a turn - on . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson eyes dance with delight ; [he]126-jameson likes this game . [I]0-i do too . “ What do [you]0-i do ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks . “ [I]126-jameson ’m [a psychic]4460-a psychic . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson bursts out laughing . Oh , it feels good to see [him]126-jameson laugh again . “ [A psychic]4460-a psychic ? ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson eyes widen in surprise . “ Yes . ”[126-jameson] “ So . . . [you]0-i read minds ? ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson do . ”[126-jameson] “ All right . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson looks around [the bar]534-the bar and gestures to [a woman]381-a woman with [his]126-jameson drink . “ Tell [me]126-jameson what [that woman]4462-that woman ’s saying over there . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i look over and see [an older woman who looks like [she]2439-an older woman who looks like she is scolding her husband as he drinks his beer is scolding [[her]2439-an older woman who looks like she is scolding her husband as he drinks his beer husband]2440-her husband as [he]126-jameson drinks [his]126-jameson beer]2439-an older woman who looks like she is scolding her husband as he drinks his beer . “ [She]4462-that woman ’s telling [him]126-jameson that [he]126-jameson had better hurry up and put on [his]126-jameson compression socks before the flight and that [he]126-jameson ’s had enough . [They]4462-that woman wo n’t let [him]126-jameson on [the plane]291-the plane if [he]126-jameson ’s drunk . ”[2439-an older woman who looks like she is scolding her husband as he drinks his beer] “ Hmm . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smirks as [he]126-jameson looks around . “ What about [him]126-jameson ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i look over to [the man who is looking at [his]126-jameson phone]2441-the man who is looking at his phone . “ [He]126-jameson ’s googling [prostitutes]4464-prostitutes for [his]126-jameson business trip . ”[0-i] “ And [him]126-jameson ? ”[126-jameson] “ Wondering if [[his]126-jameson wife]4465-his wife is sleeping with [[her]4465-his wife boss]4466-her boss . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson smile broadens . “ [You]0-i ’re good . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i cock [my]0-i head . “ [I]126-jameson know . ”[126-jameson] “ And [her]2442-a girl staring at her phone ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i look over at [a girl staring at [her]2442-a girl staring at her phone phone]2442-a girl staring at her phone with a worried look on [her]2442-a girl staring at her phone face . “ Googling fungal infections . [She]2442-a girl staring at her phone ’s worried that [she]2442-a girl staring at her phone caught something from [her]2442-a girl staring at her phone wild and condomless Saturday night . ”[2442-a girl staring at her phone] [His]126-jameson eyes dance in delight as [he]126-jameson looks around [the bar]534-the bar , and then [his]126-jameson eyes come back to meet [mine]0-i . “ What about [me]126-jameson ? ”[126-jameson] “ What are [you]126-jameson thinking ? ”[126-jameson] “ Yes . ”[2444-our] [Our]2444-our eyes lock . . . shit , [I]0-i promised [myself]0-i that [I]0-i would n’t be [a drama queen]3615-a drama queen tonight , and that is a surefire question to wind [me]0-i up . [I]0-i could go to [town]3306-town on what [a jackass]2447-a jackass [he]126-jameson ’s been . . . and [I]0-i will later . “ Right now ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Yes . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson eyes are dark as [he]126-jameson watches [me]0-i . “ It ’s good to see [you]0-i . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson gives [me]0-i a slow , sexy smile and leans toward [me]0-i . “ It is . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson cups [my]0-i face in [his]126-jameson hand , and [my]0-i heart stops . “ Although that was n’t all [I]126-jameson was thinking . ”[126-jameson] “ No , ”[0-i] [I]0-i breathe . “ [I]0-i know . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson smiles as if fascinated , [our]2448-our faces only millimeters apart . “ Why do n’t [you]0-i tell [me]126-jameson what else [I]126-jameson was thinking ? ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson eyes drop to [my]0-i lips . “ [You]126-jameson were wondering what the chocolate on [my]0-i lips tastes like , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . How am [I]0-i supposed to string two words together when [he]126-jameson ’s looking at [me]0-i like that ? In slow motion , [he]126-jameson leans in and licks [my]0-i open lips . [My]0-i sex clenches in appreciation . Oh God . . . “ Are [you]126-jameson flirting with [me]0-i , [Jim]90-jim ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [He]126-jameson licks [me]0-i again . “ [I]126-jameson am . How am [I]126-jameson doing ? ”[126-jameson] Goose bumps scatter up [my]0-i spine , and [I]0-i swallow the lump in [my]0-i throat . “ Okay . ”[0-i] “ Just okay ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i nod , breathless from [his]126-jameson touch . “ What about when [I]0-i do this ? ”[0-i] In slow motion [he]126-jameson kisses [me]0-i ; [his]126-jameson strong tongue slides through [my]0-i open mouth and tenderly caresses [mine]0-i . “ That could probably work , ”[0-i] [I]0-i murmur against [his]126-jameson lips . “ And this ? ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson kiss deepens , and [I]0-i feel [my]0-i arousal waken from its dormant sleep . [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes as emotion rushes through [me]0-i . . . this is not good . One kiss , and [I]0-i ’m about to burst into tears . How could [you]2449-you treat [me]0-i so badly ? Do n’t be [a wimp]2450-a wimp . . . [I]0-i need to keep [my]0-i emotions in check . . . at least for now . Tomorrow is a different story , but tonight is about celebrating what [we]2451-we have with [each other]351-each other . [I]0-i pull out of [his]126-jameson kiss . “ [I]0-i do n’t know what kind of woman [you]126-jameson think [I]0-i am , [Jim]90-jim , but [I]0-i can assure [you]126-jameson — picking up [camping tour directors]4467-camping tour directors in [an airport bar]2426-an airport bar is not [my]0-i style . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sit back and straighten [my]0-i shirt and sip [my]0-i margarita . [He]126-jameson rolls [his]126-jameson lips as if amused with the game and picks [my]0-i hand up and brings it to [his]126-jameson lips . [He]126-jameson begins to kiss it , and then [he]126-jameson turns it over and , with [his]126-jameson strong tongue , licks the palm of [my]0-i hand . [My]0-i sex clenches in appreciation . . . fuck . [I]0-i ’m losing control of this situation . Fast . [I]0-i glance over and see [two girls sitting near [us]2454-we]2453-two girls sitting near us , transfixed and watching [him]126-jameson with [their]2453-two girls sitting near us mouths hanging open . What must [we]2454-we look like ? [A gorgeous man sitting here making out with [my]0-i hand]2455-a gorgeous man sitting here making out with my hand while [I]0-i act totally uninterested . Act being the operative word . “ [You]126-jameson ’re making a scene , ”[0-i] [I]0-i murmur as [I]0-i watch [him]126-jameson . “ [I]126-jameson ca n’t help it , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson murmurs against [my]0-i skin . “ It ’s been too long . ”[126-jameson] “ How long ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Fifteen days . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson kisses [my]0-i hand again . “ Fifteen long days . ”[126-jameson] That ’s how long [we]2454-we ’ve been apart . . . [he]126-jameson knows how long [we]2454-we ’ve been apart to the day . [He]126-jameson wants to break the ice between [us]2454-we too . [He]126-jameson ’s missed [me]0-i ; [I]0-i know [he]126-jameson has . Suddenly [I]0-i do n’t want to play hard to get . [I]0-i want [him]126-jameson . . . hard . . . and fast . [I]0-i pull [my]0-i hand away from [his]126-jameson lips . “ Buy [me]0-i another drink , and then perhaps [I]0-i ’ll put [you]126-jameson out of [your]126-jameson misery . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson eyes flicker with arousal , and [his]126-jameson hand immediately goes up as [he]126-jameson summons [the waiter]867-the waiter . “ Yes , [sir]3064-sir . ”[126-jameson] “ Two — ”[126-jameson] “ Four , ”[0-i] [I]0-i interrupt [him]126-jameson . [He]126-jameson frowns , probably deterred by the extra time it ’s going to take to drink those . “ Four margaritas , please , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson replies to [the waiter]867-the waiter . “ Yes , [sir]3064-sir . ”[126-jameson] “ Please make it fast , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson adds . [The waiter]867-the waiter frowns at [his]126-jameson apparent desperation . “ Yes , [sir]3064-sir , of course . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson rushes to the bar . [We]2459-we stare at [each other]351-each other as electricity thrums between [us]2459-we — no words are needed . [We]2459-we both can feel this magnetic pull to [each other]351-each other ; it ’s too strong to deny . “ It really . . . is good to see [you]0-i , [Em]91-emily , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . An hour later [we]2459-we walk down [the hotel corridor]2462-the hotel corridor , hand in hand . [We]2459-we are both quiet , lost in [our]2459-we own thoughts . [My]0-i heart is beating so fast , and [I]0-i know what ’s about to happen . . . [I]0-i ’m looking forward to what ’s about to happen . [He]126-jameson opens the door and leads [me]0-i into [the penthouse]2463-the penthouse . [I]0-i look around and am instantly reminded of who [I]0-i ’m with . It ’s easy for [me]0-i to forget [his]126-jameson wealth , but it never goes away . The door closes behind [us]2459-we , and [he]126-jameson turns [me]0-i to [him]126-jameson . [We]2459-we stare at [each other]351-each other , and then [he]126-jameson wraps [his]126-jameson arms around [me]0-i and holds [me]0-i tight as [he]126-jameson puts [his]126-jameson head into the crook of [my]0-i neck . [He]126-jameson holds [me]0-i and holds [me]0-i . . . as if scared to let [me]0-i go . The love between [us]2459-we is palpable — so much emotion . . . so much regret — and [I]0-i find [myself]0-i tearing up . [I]0-i want to blurt out that [I]0-i love [him]126-jameson , that [he]126-jameson hurt [me]0-i , and that [I]0-i ’m angry , but [I]0-i want to let the moment just be . Let the feelings between [us]2459-we speak for [themselves]2459-we ; words seem irrelevant to what ’s between [us]2459-we . [He]126-jameson pulls back , and [his]126-jameson eyes search [mine]0-i . “ [I]126-jameson ’ve missed [you]0-i , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . [I]0-i cup [his]126-jameson face in [my]0-i two hands , and [I]0-i kiss [him]126-jameson long and slow and just how [he]126-jameson likes it . [He]126-jameson smiles against [my]0-i lips as [he]126-jameson slowly unbuttons [my]0-i shirt and throws it to the side . [He]126-jameson takes off [my]0-i bra and cups [my]0-i breasts . [His]126-jameson thumbs dust back and forth over [my]0-i hardened nipples . [Our]2465-our lips are locked , and [he]126-jameson undoes [my]0-i pants and slides them down and takes them off . [He]126-jameson drops to [his]126-jameson knees , and [I]0-i hold [my]0-i breath as [he]126-jameson slides [my]0-i panties down [my]0-i legs and takes them off . [He]126-jameson leans in and inhales [my]0-i sex deeply ; [his]126-jameson eyes close in pleasure as [he]126-jameson kisses [me]0-i there . Oh . . . [I]0-i ’ve missed [him]126-jameson . [I]0-i think back to the first night [we]2465-our had together on [our]2465-our stopover , and it was so different to this . [His]126-jameson touch back then was filled with lust ; [his]126-jameson touch now is filled with adoration and love . [He]126-jameson lifts [my]0-i leg over [his]126-jameson shoulder and licks [me]0-i in [my]0-i most private part , the one that [nobody]3121-nobody but [he]126-jameson knows . [My]0-i hands instinctively go to the back of [his]126-jameson head . This is insane . [I]0-i have n’t touched [him]126-jameson once , and [he]126-jameson ’s on [his]126-jameson knees in front of [me]0-i , completely dressed . . . having the time of [his]126-jameson life . [His]126-jameson tongue finds a rhythm , and [my]0-i body begins to move by itself , guiding [his]126-jameson tongue just where . [I]0-i begin to shudder , and [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes to try and block [him]126-jameson out . [He]126-jameson ’s been touching [me]0-i for all of four minutes , and [I]0-i ’m about to come . . . hold it . [My]0-i knees go weak , and [I]0-i shudder against [him]126-jameson , and [I]0-i feel [him]126-jameson smile into [me]0-i . [He]126-jameson laps [me]0-i up and lays [me]0-i on the bed . [He]126-jameson arranges [me]0-i how [he]126-jameson wants [me]0-i and spreads [my]0-i legs open for [his]126-jameson gaze . “ So . . . fucking perfect , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers to [himself]126-jameson . With urgency , [he]126-jameson tears [his]126-jameson shirt over [his]126-jameson head and slides [his]126-jameson jeans down . [His]126-jameson cock hangs heavy and hard between [his]126-jameson legs . [He]126-jameson ’s so beautiful . . . [the perfect male specimen]2467-the perfect male specimen . [I]0-i smile up at [him]126-jameson , and then [he]126-jameson goes to [his]126-jameson pocket and takes out a condom . Uneasiness fills [me]0-i . “ What are [you]126-jameson doing ? ”[126-jameson] “ [I]0-i want [you]0-i more than once , and [I]0-i do n’t want to lose the sensitivity . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i watch [him]126-jameson roll it on . . . that ’s weird ; in the past [he]126-jameson always made [me]0-i roll them on [him]126-jameson as if [he]126-jameson was unable to . [He]126-jameson lies beside [me]0-i on the bed and runs [his]126-jameson fingers through [my]0-i hair as [he]126-jameson looks down at [me]0-i . [I]0-i ca n’t read [him]126-jameson tonight at all . [He]126-jameson seems . . . intense . “ [You]126-jameson ’re seeming very sentimental tonight , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Maybe [I]0-i am . ”[0-i] [I]0-i reach out and cup [his]126-jameson face in [my]0-i hand . [He]126-jameson seems so lost . “ Are [you]126-jameson all right ? ”[126-jameson] “ Tonight [I]126-jameson am . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson leans down and kisses [me]0-i , and [I]0-i can feel the emotion behind it . It ’s as if [he]126-jameson ’s channeling all [his]126-jameson love through [his]126-jameson lips , and [I]0-i lose all coherent thought . [He]126-jameson lies over [me]0-i , and [our]2468-our bodies take on an agenda of their own as they writhe together . [Our]2468-our kiss turns frantic , and [he]126-jameson lifts one of [my]0-i legs and slides in deep . [I]0-i feel the stretch of [his]126-jameson possession ; there ’s no forgetting [his]126-jameson size . It ’s unapologetic . [We]2468-our both moan in pleasure , and [he]126-jameson slides out and slowly back in . [I]0-i ’m wet , so wet , and the sound of [my]0-i arousal hangs in the air . “ Jesus fucking Christ , [Emily]91-emily , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers as [he]126-jameson loses control and slams in hard , knocking the air from [my]0-i lungs . And then [we]2468-our ’re hard at it . The bed is hitting the wall with force ; [our]2468-our eyes are locked on [each other]351-each other ’s . . . silent . . . and in awe . This is a higher level of frequency . [Our]2468-our bodies were made to fit together . [We]2468-our were made to fit together . [He]126-jameson screws up [his]126-jameson face as if in pain . “ [I]126-jameson ca n’t hold it , [babe]3279-babe , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson pants . [I]0-i smile . [I]0-i love that [he]126-jameson ca n’t hold it . “ Let go , ”[0-i] [I]0-i breathe against [his]126-jameson lips . “ [We]2468-our have all night . Give [me]0-i everything . ”[0-i] [I]0-i roll over and feel the dull ache deep inside , and [I]0-i wince . Oh man . . . [my]0-i body is wrecked . [Jameson Miles]126-jameson fucked [me]0-i all night long . Hard and every which way , and today [I]0-i ’m going to pay for it . [I]0-i turn toward [him]126-jameson . [He]126-jameson ’s lying on [his]126-jameson side , perched on [his]126-jameson elbow , watching [me]0-i . “ Hi . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smile softly , embarrassed by what [he]126-jameson must have seen . “ Hi . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson leans in and kisses [me]0-i before taking [me]0-i in [his]126-jameson arms and holding [me]0-i tight . “ [I]0-i ’m sore , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ That makes two of [us]2470-us . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smirks . [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes against [his]126-jameson chest , and [we]2470-us lie in peaceful bliss for another half hour , dozing . [I]0-i get up to go to [the bathroom]328-the bathroom and notice the trash can full of condoms . . . hmm , [he]126-jameson wore condoms all night . [I]0-i did n’t notice at the time . [I]0-i get back into bed beside [him]126-jameson and snuggle back against [his]126-jameson chest . “ Why did [you]126-jameson wear condoms last night ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i feel [his]126-jameson body stiffen beneath [me]0-i , and [I]0-i instantly know it was purposeful . [He]126-jameson stays silent . “ [Jim]90-jim ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i sit up . “ Do n’t . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson goes to pull [me]0-i back down onto [his]126-jameson chest . “ Let ’s just have a nice morning together . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson . “ Why would [you]126-jameson wear condoms when [I]0-i know how much [you]126-jameson hate them ? ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson exhales heavily as if annoyed and gets out of bed . “ [I]126-jameson do n’t want any accidents . ”[126-jameson] “ What ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson exhales heavily as if frustrated . [I]0-i sit up . “ [You]126-jameson think [I]0-i would trap [you]126-jameson by getting pregnant ? ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson rolls [his]126-jameson eyes . “ What the hell ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i snap as [I]0-i jump out of bed . “ Are [you]126-jameson serious ? ”[0-i] “ [We]4473-we ’re not together , [Emily]91-emily . [I]0-i would have to be [a fucking idiot]4317-a fucking idiot to not take precautions . ”[0-i] [My]0-i face falls . “ What was last night ? ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ It was goodbye . ”[126-jameson] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i can feel the tears of shock welling in [my]0-i eyes . “ Do n’t be upset , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson stammers . “ Do n’t be upset ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i cry as [I]0-i begin to lose control . “ [You]126-jameson summoned [me]126-jameson here to meet [you]126-jameson with absolutely no intention of [us]4475-us getting back together ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson stares at [me]0-i . “ Is that true ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i yell . “ [I]126-jameson ’m not [the man for [you]0-i]4476-the man for you , [Emily]91-emily , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson replies calmly , and [I]0-i know that this is a practiced speech . [I]0-i frown as the walls begin to close in around [me]0-i . “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [You]126-jameson ’re in love with [Jim]90-jim . ”[0-i] [I]0-i angrily swipe the tears as they roll down [my]0-i cheeks . “ [I]0-i ’m [Jameson]126-jameson . [Jim]90-jim does n’t exist , [Emily]91-emily . [He]90-jim ’s a figment of [your]0-i imagination , [the man [you]0-i want [me]0-i to be]4477-the man you want me to be . ”[0-i] “ What the fuck are [you]126-jameson talking about ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i cry . “ [You]126-jameson ’re better off without [me]0-i . ”[0-i] “ If this is about [Jake]158-jay — ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . “ This is n’t about [Jake]158-jay , although [I]0-i ’m fucking furious with [you]126-jameson for lying to [me]0-i . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i swear to [you]2472-i that nothing happened , ”[0-i] [I]0-i cry . “ [I]0-i know it did n’t . ”[0-i] “ Then why ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [I]0-i do n’t understand . [We]4478-we belong together , [Jay]158-jay . ”[0-i] “ [I]2472-i ca n’t . ”[2472-i] [He]2472-i closes [his]2472-i eyes and pauses for a moment as if steeling [himself]2472-i to push the words past [his]2472-i lips . “ [I]2472-i do n’t want marriage and [babies]4479-babies . [I]2472-i do n’t want the same things as [you]0-i . [I]2472-i ’m not cut out to do normal , [Emily]91-emily . [I]2472-i ’m married to [my]2472-i job . It will never change . [I]2472-i ’ve thought long and hard about this . ”[2472-i] [I]0-i step back from [him]2472-i as horror dawns . [I]0-i can hear [my]0-i own heartbeat in the silence . “ [I]2472-i will always love [you]0-i , ”[2472-i] [he]2472-i whispers . [I]0-i stare at [him]2472-i through tears . . . what the fuck is happening right now ? [He]2472-i brushes past [me]0-i and goes into [the bathroom]328-the bathroom , and the door closes . [I]0-i stare at a piece of carpet on the floor , shocked to [my]0-i core . After the beautiful night [we]2474-we had together . . . this is how [he]2472-i treats [me]0-i ? [He]2472-i reappears fully dressed , and [his]2472-i eyes find [mine]0-i . “ Can [I]2472-i give [you]0-i a lift somewhere ? ”[2472-i] “ If [you]2472-i walk out that door now , [we]2474-we are over forever , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [His]2472-i eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ [I]2472-i know . ”[2472-i] [He]2472-i steps forward and kisses [me]0-i softly as [he]2472-i cups [my]0-i face in [his]2472-i hands . [Our]2474-we faces screw up against each other ’s . “ This is for the best ; [another man]630-another man can make [you]0-i happier . ”[2472-i] [I]0-i step back , furious . “ Do n’t [you]2472-i dare throw that shit at [me]0-i . ”[0-i] “ Do [you]2472-i want a lift or not ? ”[2472-i] “ Go to hell , ”[0-i] [I]0-i spit . [His]2472-i haunted eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ [I]2472-i ’m already there . ”[2472-i] [He]2472-i turns and walks out the door . It clicks quietly behind [him]2472-i . [I]0-i sob out loud into the silence as [I]0-i hold [my]0-i poor heart . Chapter 23 [I]0-i sit on the carpet cross - legged , with [my]0-i back rested against the couch , and flick [my]0-i phone . [I]0-i watch it spin until it slows in momentum , and [I]0-i spin it again . It ’s been a weird day today — one of realization and the closing of a chapter in [my]0-i life . [I]0-i ’m not crying . [I]0-i do n’t have any tears left for [Jameson Miles]126-jameson . To be honest , [I]0-i ’m just angry , mostly with [myself]0-i for meeting [him]126-jameson last night and being [[his]126-jameson puppet]383-his puppet once again . [Magic Mike XXL]96-michael is on Netflix , and [I]0-i ’m watching it again . It ’s ironic , really , that [we]2476-our started [our]2476-our love affair watching this movie , and now [I]0-i ’m watching it again on [our]2476-our demise . [I]0-i ’ve been deep in thought . [I]0-i ’ve got some decisions to make — big decisions . About where [I]0-i ’m going with [my]0-i life . . . [my]0-i career and [my]0-i future at [Miles Media]12-miles media . [I]0-i already know what [I]0-i need to do . [I]0-i glance up to the television , and it ’s a campfire scene on [the beach]2477-the beach , and [the men]434-the men are talking about [a woman one of [them]434-the men loved]2479-a woman one of them loved . “ When [someone]401-someone shows [themselves]401-someone to [you]0-i . . . believe [them]401-someone . ”[434-the men] [My]0-i chest constricts at the significance of that statement . For weeks now , [I]0-i ’ve refused to believe that [Jameson Miles]126-jameson was coldhearted . [He]126-jameson is , though ; no matter how [the man [I]0-i thought [I]0-i knew]2359-the man i thought i knew presented [himself]126-jameson . . . [his]126-jameson reality is a lie . “ [Jim]90-jim does n’t exist , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson said . [My]0-i phone rings , and the name [Tristan]135-tristan lights up the screen . [I]0-i frown . “ Hello . ”[0-i] “ Oh [my]0-i God , [Em]91-emily . [They]401-someone think [they]401-someone ’ve found it . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sit up . “ What ? ”[0-i] “ [[Lara Aspin]145-lara aspin ’s computer]4482-lara aspin ’s computer — there ’s evidence on there that it was used to log in to [our]4483-our bank accounts . ”[0-i] “ What ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper , wide eyed . “ [We]4483-our do n’t have details yet , but [the computer analysts]4484-the computer analysts just called to let [us]4483-our know that the history is very promising . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ That ’s great . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i ’ll see [you]2481-you in [the office]444-the office in the morning ? Come up to [the top floor]467-the top floor as soon as [you]2481-you get in . ”[0-i] “ Yeah , sure . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause on the line . “ Hey , thanks for letting [me]0-i know . ”[0-i] “ See [you]0-i in the morning , ”[2481-you] [he]2481-you says chirpily down the line . [I]0-i hang up and , with a sad smile , stare into space for a moment . [I]0-i get up and open [my]0-i laptop at the [kitchen]926-kitchen table , and [I]0-i begin to type . [I]0-i believe [you]2481-you , [Jameson]126-jameson . . . [I]0-i finally believe [you]2481-you . “ Oh [my]110-aaron God , [Em]91-emily , did [you]0-i hear ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron smiles happily as [he]110-aaron spins on [his]110-aaron chair toward [me]0-i . [I]0-i ’ve just arrived at work for the morning and put [my]0-i handbag down onto the desk . “ What ? ”[110-aaron] “ The headlines today say that [they]4487-they have made an arrest over the embezzlement . ”[110-aaron] “ Really ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i fake a smile . “ That ’s great . ”[0-i] [I]0-i look around . “ Is [Moll]111-molly here yet ? ”[0-i] “ No , [she]111-molly ’ll be here soon . ”[110-aaron] [He]110-aaron turns on [his]110-aaron computer . “ Okay , [I]110-aaron ’ll be back in a moment . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i take the envelope from [my]0-i bag and swipe [my]0-i card to get to the roof . Funnily enough , it works today . The doors open , and [Sammia]116-sammia smiles broadly as if [she]116-sammia ’s happy to see [me]0-i . “ Good morning , [Emily]91-emily . ”[116-sammia] “ Hi . ”[0-i] [I]0-i look around . “ Is [Tristan]135-tristan here ? ”[0-i] “ Yes , [he]135-tristan ’s in [[Jameson]126-jameson ’s office]3491-jameson ’s office . Just go through . ”[0-i] [My]0-i stomach drops . “ Okay , thank [you]126-jameson . ”[0-i] [I]0-i walk across the tiles and make a mental note of the sound . [My]0-i shoes do n’t click on the tiles anymore , and [I]0-i think back to a time when [they]2483-they did . [I]0-i look out over the view and take a picture in [my]0-i mind . [I]0-i do love [this building]3164-this building — so many exciting memories of when [I]0-i started coming up to this floor . [I]0-i knock on the door and hear [Jameson]126-jameson ’s strong voice . “ Come in . ”[126-jameson] Here [we]2485-we go . [I]0-i swallow [my]0-i nerves and open the door , and [Tristan]135-tristan ’s face lights up . “ Here [she]4489-she is . [The hero of the day]4490-the hero of the day . ”[135-tristan] “ Hi . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes find [Jameson]126-jameson ’s across [the room]613-the room . “ Hi . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson dips [his]126-jameson head as if ashamed . “ The evidence is all on the computer , [Em]91-emily . ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan beams . “ [You]126-jameson did it ; [you]126-jameson solved the case . [I]135-tristan do n’t know why [you]126-jameson kept following [her]4489-she , but [boy]4491-boy , am [I]135-tristan glad that [you]126-jameson did . ”[135-tristan] “ Happy [I]126-jameson could help . ”[126-jameson] “ Thank [you]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson frowns as if pained . “ [I]126-jameson ’m very grateful for [your]126-jameson dedication to solving the case . ”[126-jameson] [Tristan]135-tristan looks between [us]2487-us and must sense the tension between [us]2487-us . “ [I]135-tristan ’m going to leave [[you]2487-us two]3244-you two alone . [We]2487-us need to celebrate . . . tonight , ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan calls as [he]135-tristan rushes from [the room]613-the room in an excited flurry . It must be such a relief to [him]135-tristan to have the case against [Jameson]126-jameson coming to an end . [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes . Damn it , just get this over with . [I]0-i hand [Jameson]126-jameson the envelope , and [he]126-jameson stares at it in [his]126-jameson hand . “ What ’s this ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks . “ [My]126-jameson letter of resignation . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson frowns as [his]126-jameson eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ No , [Em]91-emily . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson shakes [his]126-jameson head . “ [I]126-jameson ca n’t accept this . ”[126-jameson] Emotion overwhelms [me]0-i , and [I]0-i blink so that [I]0-i do n’t cry . “ [I]0-i ca n’t work [here]275-here , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[0-i] “ [You]91-emily love [Miles Media]103-miles media — working [here]275-here was [your]91-emily dream , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . “ No . [You]91-emily ’re wrong . [I]126-jameson loved [you]91-emily . . . and [you]91-emily were [my]126-jameson dream . [I]126-jameson ’ve taken a position with [Athena]197-athena , [the place [I]126-jameson did [my]126-jameson internships]4495-the place i did my internships . [I]126-jameson start next Monday . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson eyes search [mine]2489-you . “ [Em]91-emily . . . ”[126-jameson] A tear escapes onto [my]0-i cheek , and [I]0-i wipe it away with a nervous smile . “ [You]126-jameson know , [I]0-i watched [Magic Mike XXL]96-michael last night . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson listens . “ And there was this poignant line that finally made everything make sense to [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] “ Which was ? ”[126-jameson] “ When [someone]401-someone shows [themselves]401-someone to [you]2489-you . . . believe [them]401-someone . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson frowns , not understanding . “ [I]126-jameson finally believe [you]2489-you , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] “ Believe what ? ”[126-jameson] “ That [you]2489-you ’re [a coward]4497-a coward . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson clenches [his]126-jameson jaw . “ That [you]2489-you ’re too scared to love [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [Our]2490-our eyes are locked , and an undercurrent of anger runs between [us]2490-our . “ And [I]126-jameson deserve someone who knows that [I]126-jameson ’m worth the risk . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson clenches [his]126-jameson jaw as [he]126-jameson watches [me]0-i . “ [You]2489-you ’re just not brave enough to love [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] “ That ’s not fair , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . “ No . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i shake [my]0-i head softly . “ Falling in love with [you]2489-you is what is n’t fair . [I]0-i never stood a chance . . . [you]2489-you knew that all along . [You]2489-you keep [your]2489-you heart in [a tightly sealed Miles - High icebox]4498-a tightly sealed miles - high icebox , only to be looked at . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson face falls , and [I]0-i turn and walk from [[his]126-jameson office]496-his office . [I]0-i close the door quietly on [my]0-i way out , and [I]0-i stare at it for a moment as [I]0-i gather the gumption to walk out of [[his]126-jameson office]496-his office for the last time . In a strange kind of irony , this has been the best and worst time of [my]0-i life . Goodbye , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles . [I]0-i will always miss [you]114-mr. miles . [Jameson]126-jameson With a tight chest , [I]0-i watch [Emily]91-emily leave [the office]444-the office . The door clicks closed , and the walls begin to close in around [me]0-i . On autopilot , [I]0-i pour [myself]0-i a scotch and walk to the window . [I]0-i stare out over [New York]3-new york as [I]0-i fight an overwhelming sense of sadness . [She]91-emily ’s gone . Knock , knock . [Tristan]135-tristan appears and smiles broadly as [he]135-tristan sees [my]0-i drink . “ [We]4499-we celebrating already ? ”[135-tristan] “ Seems that way . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan looks around . “ Where ’s [Emily]91-emily ? ”[135-tristan] “ [She]91-emily left . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sip [my]0-i scotch and feel the warmth of the amber fluid . [I]0-i stare at it in the glass . “ [She]91-emily resigned . Effective immediately . ”[0-i] “ What ? ”[135-tristan] [His]135-tristan face falls . “ [You]0-i ca n’t be serious . ”[135-tristan] “ It ’s for the best . ”[0-i] “ What the fuck ? How is it for the best ? ”[0-i] “ [We]4499-we were never going to work , [Tris]135-tristan ; [you]135-tristan knew that . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause . “ There ’s always going to be [an asshole like [Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara prepared to step on [her]91-emily to bring [me]0-i down]4500-an asshole like ferrara prepared to step on her to bring me down . [I]0-i do n’t want [her]91-emily dragged through the mud any further . ”[0-i] “ Is that what [you]0-i ’re telling [yourself]0-i ? ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan huffs . [I]0-i stare out the window . “ [I]0-i do n’t fucking get [you]135-tristan , [man]3269-man ; [you]135-tristan ’re madly in love with [her]91-emily . Why are [you]135-tristan really letting [her]91-emily go ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause as [I]0-i contemplate [his]135-tristan question . “ [She]91-emily deserves better than the life [I]0-i can give [her]91-emily . ”[0-i] “ Fuck off , ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan scoffs . “ [She]91-emily could n’t get a better life than the one [you]0-i could give [her]91-emily . [She]91-emily would never want for anything . ”[135-tristan] “ It ’s not the money [she]91-emily wants , ”[0-i] [I]0-i mutter dryly . “ What does [she]91-emily want ? ”[0-i] “ Things . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i try to articulate [my]0-i thoughts . “ Things . . . [I]0-i ’m incapable of giving [her]91-emily . ”[0-i] “ Like what ? ”[0-i] “ Time . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan stares at [me]0-i , lost . “ But [you]0-i committed to [Claudia]122-claudia no problem . ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i raise [my]0-i eyebrows as [I]0-i sip [my]0-i scotch . “ What does that mean ? ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i did n’t care if [Claudia]122-claudia was waiting at [home]3076-home for [me]0-i . [I]0-i did n’t care how much time [I]0-i spent away from [her]122-claudia . [I]0-i could travel , work , focus . . . [I]0-i was content to put [her]122-claudia fourth or fifth in line , and [she]122-claudia never expected anything different . ”[0-i] [I]0-i exhale heavily . [I]0-i feel the weight of [the world]268-the world on [my]0-i shoulders . “ [Claudia]122-claudia was easy . ”[0-i] “ Because [you]2495-he did n’t really love [her]122-claudia ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug , unable to put a label on [my]0-i feelings . [He]2495-he puts [his]2495-he hand on [my]0-i shoulder . “ [You]0-i ’re more than [a CEO]4503-a ceo , [Jameson]126-jameson . [You]0-i deserve to be happy too . Why do [you]0-i think it has to be one or the other ? ”[2495-he] [I]0-i frown , pained . “ Do n’t let the love of [your]0-i life walk away because [you]0-i ’re scared that [you]0-i ’re going to lose [her]122-claudia . ”[0-i] “ It ’s inevitable , [Tristan]135-tristan . . . eventually , [she]122-claudia will leave . [Her]122-claudia hand will be forced . ”[2495-he] “ And then what will [you]0-i be ? ”[2495-he] [he]2495-he snaps . “ [A lonely , stressed - out , alcoholic CEO]4504-a lonely , stressed - out , alcoholic ceo ? ”[2495-he] [My]0-i eyes rise to meet [his]2495-he . “ Oh , wait . ”[2495-he] [He]2495-he gestures to [my]0-i drink . “ That ’s already happening . ”[2495-he] [He]2495-he shakes [his]2495-he head in disgust . “ When [I]2495-he find [[my]2495-he woman]4083-my woman , [I]2495-he ’ll move heaven and hell to keep [her]122-claudia . ”[2495-he] “ Get out . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh . “ [You]2495-he have no idea what [you]2495-he ’re fucking talking about . ”[0-i] “ Actually , [I]2495-he ’m kind of glad [I]2495-he ’m getting to watch [you]0-i fuck up [your]0-i life , ”[2495-he] [he]2495-he calls as [he]2495-he walks toward the door . “ Now [I]2495-he know what not to do . ”[2495-he] [I]0-i sip [my]0-i scotch as the door slams hard behind [him]2495-he . [My]0-i buzzer on [my]0-i desk sounds , and [I]0-i push the button . “ Yes , [Sammia]116-sammia . ”[0-i] “ [The detectives]4422-the detectives are here to see [you]2495-he , [sir]3064-sir . ”[0-i] [I]0-i drain [my]0-i glass . . . good , a distraction . “ Thank [you]3064-sir , send [them]4422-the detectives in . ”[91-emily] [Emily]91-emily “ A toast . ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly smiles as [she]111-molly holds [her]111-molly glass up . [Aaron]110-aaron and [I]0-i hold [our]2496-we glasses up to touch [hers]111-molly . “ To new beginnings . ”[0-i] “ To new beginnings , ”[2496-we] [we]2496-we all repeat . “ [You]0-i ’re going to be great . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron smiles . “ [You]0-i watch — [you’ll]0-i be taking over the news floor within no time . ”[110-aaron] [We]2496-we ’re out to dinner in [a bar]3348-a bar and celebrating . [I]0-i start [my]0-i new job tomorrow . It ’s been a week since [I]0-i left [Miles Media]12-miles media . Feels like a lifetime ago . [I]0-i was going to go [home]3076-home and see [[my]0-i parents]1276-my parents , but [I]0-i just did n’t have the mental energy . [I]0-i stayed [home]3076-home for some self - love instead . [I]0-i needed time alone to lick [my]0-i wounds and heal . [I]0-i had a few massages , got some Reiki done to calm [my]0-i heartache , ate healthy , and went for two runs a day to exhaust [myself]0-i so that [my]0-i body had no choice but to sleep at night . [I]0-i ’m okay . . . empty , but doing okay . [I]0-i ’ve stopped reading the paper so that [I]0-i do n’t have to see [his]2501-him name . On [my]0-i runs , [I]0-i go the other way so [I]0-i do n’t have to see [the Miles Media building]624-the miles media building or [restaurants]2259-restaurants or anything that would remind [me]0-i of [him]2501-him or [our]2504-our time together . [Him]2501-him . . . [I]0-i ca n’t even bring [myself]0-i to say [his]2501-him name . [He]2501-him ’s been put into [the vault]2505-the vault , and [nobody]3121-nobody dares mentioning [him]2501-him to [me]0-i . It ’s like [he]2501-him never existed . . . and maybe [he]2501-him never did . “ What are [you]110-aaron wearing tomorrow ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly asks as [she]111-molly cuts into [her]111-molly steak . “ [I]111-molly thought [my]111-molly navy suit . ”[111-molly] [I]0-i chew [my]0-i food . “ [I]111-molly want to look professional and smart . ”[111-molly] “ No gray skirt ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron smirks . [I]0-i wipe [my]0-i mouth with [my]0-i napkin . “ [I]0-i threw [that fucker]4508-that fucker out . ”[0-i] “ What ? ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly shrieks . “ [I]111-molly loved that skirt ! [I]111-molly would have had it . ”[111-molly] “ That was a troublemaking skirt , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply . “ Trust [me]0-i ; [you]0-i do n’t want that kind of negativity in [your]0-i life . ”[0-i] “ Here , here . ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron lifts [his]110-aaron glass , and [we]2507-we clink again . “ [Michael]96-michael asked [me]111-molly out on a date on Saturday night , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly says casually . [My]0-i knife and fork hit the plate with a clang as [my]0-i eyes rise to meet [hers]111-molly . “ What ? ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly shrugs . “ [I]111-molly do n’t know what to make of it , really . ”[111-molly] “ Did [he]96-michael ask [you]111-molly out for a casual dinner ? Are [you]111-molly sure it ’s a date ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron frowns . “ No , [his]96-michael exact words were , ‘ Would [you]111-molly like to come out on a date on Saturday night ? ’ ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i smile . “ Are [you]111-molly going to go ? ”[0-i] “ [I]111-molly do n’t know . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly sighs . “ So much water has passed under the bridge between [us]4509-us . [We]4509-us ’ve just got to a place of trust and friendship again . [I]111-molly do n’t want to ruin it . ”[111-molly] “ By fucking [him]96-michael ? ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron smirks as [he]110-aaron bites into [his]110-aaron food . “ Well , if [I]110-aaron did fuck [him]96-michael , and [he]96-michael did n’t use double Viagra on [me]110-aaron , [I]110-aaron would be mortally offended . [I]110-aaron know what tricks [he]96-michael has in [his]96-michael toolbox now . ”[110-aaron] [We]2508-we all giggle . “ God , that night was funny , ”[0-i] [I]0-i add , remembering [him]110-aaron passing out from all the blood in [his]110-aaron dick . [Molly]111-molly rolls [her]111-molly eyes . “ For [you]0-i , maybe . ”[111-molly] [We]2508-we fall silent as [we]2508-we eat . “ Good luck for tomorrow , [babe]3279-babe , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron says . “ Thanks , [guys]3486-guys . ”[110-aaron] [I]0-i smile . “ [You]4512-you are the best two things about [New York]3-new york . ”[110-aaron] “ God , [you]0-i ’re so right , ”[111-molly] [Molly]111-molly mutters into [her]111-molly glass . “ And these margaritas . ”[111-molly] [She]111-molly raises [her]111-molly glass to show [me]0-i . “ So should [I]111-molly go out with [Mike]96-michael ? ”[111-molly] “ Yes , ”[110-aaron] [Aaron]110-aaron and [I]0-i gasp . “ Go . ”[110-aaron] “ [Emily]91-emily . ”[197-athena] [Athena]197-athena smiles as [she]197-athena wraps [her]197-athena arms around [me]0-i . “ It ’s so good to see [you]0-i . Welcome . ”[197-athena] “ Hi . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile nervously . “ [You]197-athena ’re going to love it here . ”[197-athena] [She]197-athena pulls [me]0-i through [the office]444-the office by the hand . “ Here is [[your]0-i office]3302-your office . ”[197-athena] [I]0-i smile , surprised . “ [I]197-athena get [[my]197-athena own office]4514-my own office ? ”[197-athena] “ Of course [you]197-athena do . ”[0-i] [I]0-i look around [the little office]2510-the little office . [It]2510-the little office ’s definitely [no management top floor]2511-no management top floor , but [it]2510-the little office suits [me]0-i just fine . There ’s a window and a desk and a chair in the corner . [It]2510-the little office ’s kind of homey . [I]0-i turn to [her]197-athena . “ Thank [you]197-athena for taking [me]0-i on . [I]0-i am so grateful . ”[0-i] [Athena]197-athena smiles and rubs [my]0-i arm . When [I]0-i called [her]197-athena asking for a job , [she]197-athena never once asked what happened with [Miles Media]103-miles media or [my]0-i relationship with [Jameson]126-jameson . But [I]0-i know that [she]197-athena knows that [I]0-i ’m probably broken with nowhere else to go , and running [home]3076-home with [my]0-i tail between [my]0-i legs is n’t an option . [She]197-athena ’s right . [I]0-i ’m going to make it up to [her]197-athena ; [I]0-i ’m going to be [the best damn reporter that [she]197-athena has ever had]2513-the best damn reporter that she has ever had . “ [I]197-athena ’ll leave [you]0-i to it . ”[197-athena] [She]197-athena smiles . “ Staff meeting at ten to introduce [you]0-i to [everyone]3098-everyone . [We]4516-we have welcome doughnuts . ”[197-athena] [I]0-i smile . “ Thanks , that would be great . ”[197-athena] [She]197-athena disappears down [the corridor]728-the corridor , and [I]0-i take a seat at [my]0-i new desk and look around [the lonely space]2515-the lonely space . [I]0-i miss [Molly]111-molly and [Aaron]110-aaron . . . and the buzz of [Miles Media]12-miles media . [Jameson]126-jameson “ With this projection here , the forecast is a growth of ten percent over the next eighteen months . ”[205-harry] [Harrison]205-harry from finance taps the graph on the projector whiteboard as [he]205-harry addresses the board meeting . The table is alive with chatter and enthusiasm . The comeback strategy from the drama over the last four months is alive and well . [Me]0-i . . . [I]0-i ’m miles away . [I]0-i ca n’t concentrate . . . [I]0-i ca n’t think . . . [I]0-i feel like [I]0-i ca n’t breathe . Maybe [I]0-i ’m not okay . [Emily]91-emily started [her]91-emily new job today , and [I]0-i wanted to call [her]91-emily and wish [her]91-emily luck . [I]0-i could n’t sleep thinking about it and even picked up the phone a few times . [I]0-i drop [my]0-i head . But what ’s the point . . . [I]0-i wonder if [she]91-emily ran this morning . Did [she]91-emily wear [her]91-emily runners that [she]91-emily said have motors on them ? [I]0-i smile softly to [myself]0-i as [I]0-i remember [Elliot]155-elliot thinking [I]0-i was talking about [Zuckerberg]185-zuckerberg having the motorized runners . [Idiot]2516-idiot . . . [I]0-i twist in [my]0-i chair to stretch [my]0-i back . [I]0-i need a massage . [Emily]91-emily does n’t like [me]0-i getting massages . [I]0-i think back to the kind of massages [I]0-i used to get , and it seems like another lifetime ago . BE — Before [Emily]91-emily . . . stop it . “ [Jameson]126-jameson will be addressing that in the morning . ”[91-emily] [I]0-i look up , lost . What are [they]2517-they talking about ? [The board members around the table]2518-the board members around the table all stare at [me]0-i as [they]2517-they wait for [my]0-i reply . [My]0-i eyes flick to [Tristan]135-tristan for guidance . “ When [you]0-i fly to [Seattle]6-seattle tonight . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan raises [his]135-tristan eyebrows as a gentle reminder . “ Yes . ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i nod . “ That ’s right . ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan is limping [me]0-i through work at the moment , well aware of [my]0-i state of mind . The meeting continues , and [I]0-i sip [my]0-i water to try and bring [my]0-i mind back to where it needs to be . This is n’t good enough , [Jameson]126-jameson . Focus . [I]0-i walk onto [the plane]291-the plane . “ Good evening , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles . [Your]114-mr. miles seat is here , [sir]3064-sir . 1A. ”[0-i] “ Thank [you]126-jameson . ”[0-i] [I]0-i fall into the seat in [the front row of [first class]304-first class]2520-the front row of first class . [The plane]291-the plane slowly boards , and [I]0-i stare out the window . [Flying]211-flying never used to bother [me]0-i . [I]0-i hate it now . [I]0-i hate that it reminds [me]0-i of [her]2523-her . . . of how [we]2524-we met . Of the night [we]2524-we had together . Of how badly things turned out in the end . With [my]0-i elbow leaning on the armrest , [I]0-i pinch the bridge of [my]0-i nose . [I]0-i just want to get [there]3073-there and go to [[my]0-i hotel]2526-my hotel and sleep . [I]0-i ’m tired and not in the mood for this shit . “ Can [I]0-i get [you]2527-an elderly man anything , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles ? ”[0-i] “ Scotch , please . ”[2527-an elderly man] [An elderly man]2527-an elderly man takes the seat next to [me]0-i . [He]2527-an elderly man nods . “ Hello . ”[2527-an elderly man] “ Hi . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . [I]0-i turn [my]0-i attention out the window to [the baggage crew down on the tarmac]2528-the baggage crew down on the tarmac , all doing [their]2528-the baggage crew down on the tarmac job and rushing around doing the safety checks . [They]2528-the baggage crew down on the tarmac ’re driving on [carts]2529-carts , flashing lights , and waving flags . [I]0-i would n’t even care if [the plane]291-the plane fucking crashed . Burning in hell would be better than this . Four days later [I]0-i smile at [Alan]152-alan as [he]152-alan stands next to [the limo]811-the limo at [the airport]276-the airport . “ Hello , [sir]3064-sir . Did [you]3064-sir have a nice trip ? ”[152-alan] “ It was fine ; thank [you]3064-sir . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i get into the back seat . “ Would [you]0-i like to do the normal route , [sir]3064-sir ? ”[152-alan] [he]152-alan asks through the door . “ Yes , please . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan smiles . “ Very well . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan shuts the door , and moments later , [the car]422-the car pulls out into the traffic . Half an hour later , [he]152-alan slows down as [we]2534-we drive past [[Emily]91-emily ’s apartment]2535-emily ’s apartment , and [I]0-i peer through the window . Is [she]91-emily there ? [We]2534-we do this every night on the way [home]3076-home — [my]0-i own stupid way of saying good night to [her]91-emily . . . if [I]0-i do n’t , [I]0-i end up running back here later . Who am [I]0-i kidding ? [I]0-i run back here most nights anyway . [I]0-i hold [my]0-i breath as [we]2534-we drive past , hoping to catch a glimpse of [her]91-emily . . . [I]0-i ’ve never seen [her]91-emily once . [My]0-i heart drops ; [she]91-emily ’s not [here]275-here . [I]0-i look back through the back window as [we]2534-we disappear down [the street]654-the street . [Emily]91-emily . . . where are [you]91-emily ? [Emily]91-emily [I]0-i sit on [the bus]2539-the bus on [my]0-i way [home]3076-home from work and read [my]0-i Kindle . It ’s dark and just around six o’clock in the evening . [I]0-i ’m happier . . . stronger . [I]0-i ’ve been at [my]0-i new job for three weeks , and [I]0-i love it . [I]0-i did the right thing . [People]267-people are all really lovely , and thankfully , [I]0-i ’m not [the office gossip]2221-the office gossip anymore , and [I]0-i have a more integral role than [I]0-i did at [Miles Media]12-miles media . [I]0-i still see [Molly]111-molly and [Aaron]110-aaron all the time for drinks and dinner , and [I]0-i ’ve planned to go [home]3076-home for the weekend . [I]0-i ’m running a lot . . . funnily enough [I]0-i do n’t need to pretend [a man with an ax]2544-a man with an ax is chasing [me]0-i . [I]0-i ’m so angry that [I]0-i ca n’t help but sprint . Gleeful jogging is no longer in [my]0-i repertoire . [The bus]2539-the bus slows . [I]0-i close [my]0-i Kindle and stand as [I]0-i wait for [the bus]2539-the bus to stop . [I]0-i climb down the steps and begin to walk the two blocks to [[my]0-i apartment]940-my apartment . The season is getting colder . Fog puffs as [I]0-i breathe , and [I]0-i wrap [my]0-i large coat around [me]0-i for warmth as [I]0-i stride it out . [I]0-i might have Indian for dinner . No . . . stick to [your]2548-your budget ; there are leftovers in the fridge from last night . [I]0-i approach [[my]0-i building]848-my building and fumble around in [my]0-i bag for [my]0-i keys . “ Hello , [Em]91-emily , ”[0-i] a voice says from behind [me]0-i . [I]0-i turn , startled . [Jameson]126-jameson stands before [me]0-i , and the sight of [him]126-jameson tightens [my]0-i chest . “ What are [you]0-i doing [here]275-here ? ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson eyes search [mine]0-i . “ [I]126-jameson had to see [you]0-i . ”[126-jameson] The sight of [him]126-jameson brings an unexpected wave of emotion that [I]0-i previously thought [I]0-i had under control . [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson through tears . [He]126-jameson carefully steps forward . “ How are [you]0-i ? ”[126-jameson] Suddenly , [I]0-i ’m furious . . . like a raging bull , and [I]0-i drop [my]0-i head and fumble through [my]0-i bag . [I]0-i need to get away from [him]126-jameson . Where are [my]0-i fucking keys ? “ Fine , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . [I]0-i find [my]0-i keys and turn toward the door . “ [I]0-i miss [you]126-jameson . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stop and close [my]0-i eyes . “ [I]126-jameson ca n’t . . . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson pauses . “ [I]126-jameson ca n’t move on until [I]126-jameson know [we]2550-we ’re okay . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i frown and turn back toward [him]126-jameson . [His]126-jameson face is pained , and [he]126-jameson appears nervous . [Our]2550-we eyes are locked , mine filled with tears . . . [his]126-jameson with regret . [He]126-jameson turns back and looks at [[his]126-jameson car]4021-his car , which [I]0-i did n’t notice parked in the dark . “ [I]126-jameson brought [you]126-jameson something . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson nearly runs to [the car]422-the car and then retrieves a huge bouquet of yellow roses and walks back and passes them to [me]0-i . [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson in confusion . “ Yellow roses ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles softly . “ Yellow roses are supposed to symbolize friendship . ”[126-jameson] “ [You]126-jameson want to be [[my]126-jameson friend]3515-my friend ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson nods hopefully . “ [We]4522-we can start fresh ? ”[126-jameson] Something snaps deep inside of [me]0-i . “ [You]126-jameson ’ve got a fucking nerve , ”[0-i] [I]0-i sneer . [His]126-jameson face falls . “ [You]126-jameson waltz back here after breaking [my]0-i fucking heart and give [me]0-i yellow fucking roses ! ”[0-i] [I]0-i scream . [He]126-jameson steps back , shocked by [my]0-i venom . “ [I]0-i would n’t be friends with [a selfish prick like [you]126-jameson]4523-a selfish prick like you if [you]126-jameson were [the last fucking person on earth]4524-the last fucking person on earth ! ”[0-i] [I]0-i yell as the angry tears run down [my]0-i face . [I]0-i completely lose control and start ripping the roses to shreds , and [I]0-i break the heads and smash them up and then throw them on the ground and jump and stomp on them . [I]0-i want to hurt these stupid roses like [he]126-jameson ’s hurt [me]0-i . [His]126-jameson haunted eyes watch on . Adrenaline is coursing through [my]0-i body , and still unsatisfied with the state of the roses , [I]0-i pick them up and walk out to [the road]638-the road and throw them as hard as [I]0-i can out onto [the asphalt]2554-the asphalt . [A passing bus]2555-a passing bus runs [them]2555-a passing bus over . “ That ’s what [you]126-jameson can do with [your]126-jameson friendship , ”[0-i] [I]0-i sneer as [I]0-i stomp past [him]126-jameson . [I]0-i open the door and walk into [the building]412-the building without looking back . [I]0-i hit the elevator button with force , and [I]0-i can see [him]126-jameson standing at the glass door , watching [me]0-i , in [my]0-i peripheral vision . Tears are streaming down [my]0-i face , and [I]0-i ’m furious that [I]0-i let [him]126-jameson see how crazy [I]0-i am . How crazy [he]126-jameson ’s made [me]0-i . The elevator doors open , and [I]0-i march in and hit the door button . The doors close , and [I]0-i screw up [my]0-i face in tears and sob out loud . Damn [you]126-jameson , [Jameson Miles]126-jameson . . . Chapter 24 There are moments in [your]2557-you life that [you]2557-you know [you]2557-you will remember forever . Certain situations that are poignant and have shaped who [you]2557-you are . Last night was one of them . What kind of psycho rips roses to shreds with [her]2558-her bare hands while screaming like a lunatic ? Shame runs through [me]0-i . This . . . is the level [I]0-i ’ve stooped to . Strangely enough , last night was the first time [I]0-i ’ve slept well in weeks . As if releasing a little of the steam in the pressure cooker has somehow calmed [my]0-i soul . [I]0-i do n’t feel guilty for being so mean . . . normally , [I]0-i would . But [Jameson Miles]126-jameson is an enigma all of [his]126-jameson own . . . one that [I]0-i can no longer pity . “ [I]0-i would n’t be friends with [a selfish prick like [you]126-jameson if [you]126-jameson were [the last person left on [earth]1165-earth]4526-the last person left on earth]4525-a selfish prick like you if you were the last person left on earth , ”[0-i] [I]0-i said . . . screamed actually . It was a mean thing to say — the worst — but [he]126-jameson got what [he]126-jameson fucking deserved . The doors of [the elevator in [[my]0-i building]848-my building]2559-the elevator in my building open , and [I]0-i step out into [the foyer]799-the foyer and walk out into [the street]654-the street . “ What the hell happened here ? ”[2563-the woman in front of me] [I]0-i hear [the woman in front of [me]0-i]2563-the woman in front of me mutter under [her]2563-the woman in front of me breath as [she]2563-the woman in front of me stops and looks around at the carnage . There are yellow rose petals strewn everywhere ; flower buds that are squashed and bruised lie on the concrete . Out on [the road]638-the road the carcass of the flattened bouquet with the big cream satin bow lies . Jesus . . . [I]0-i drop [my]0-i head and stomp past the crazy . [I]0-i glance up at the ceiling to see where the cameras are . [I]0-i wonder if [anyone]295-anyone saw it on the security footage . [I]0-i hope not . . . how embarrassing . [I]0-i get on [[my]0-i bus]2566-my bus and open [my]0-i Kindle . [I]0-i ’m not reading [my]0-i usual rom - com genre . [I]0-i ca n’t stand the thought of all that love bullshit . [I]0-i ’m mixing it up and reading [Pet Sematary]65-pet sematary — maybe that ’s it . Maybe [Steven King]212-steven king is taking [me]0-i to [the dark side]2567-the dark side . The side where [you]2568-you do n’t take shit , and payback on yellow roses is due . Good for [him]212-steven king . . . bring it the fuck on . [I]0-i swipe to the next page . Every dog has its day . [Jameson]126-jameson [I]0-i sip [my]0-i coffee as [I]0-i sit in [the café across [the street]654-the street from [Miles Media]12-miles media]2238-the café across the street from miles media . [I]0-i ’ve been coming [here]275-here the last few days before work . [Alan]152-alan told [me]0-i that [Emily]91-emily used to come here with [[her]91-emily friends]2572-her friends . [I]0-i ’m hoping to run into one of [them]2572-her friends . Why ? [I]0-i do n’t know . [Emily]91-emily ’s words from last night are playing over and over in [my]0-i mind . [I]0-i would n’t be friends with [a selfish prick like [you]2574-you]4523-a selfish prick like you if [you]2574-you were [the last person on earth]2575-the last person on earth . . . [I]0-i would n’t want to be friends with [me]0-i either if [I]0-i were [her]91-emily . [I]0-i ’ve never seen [her]91-emily so angry . . . or thin . [She]91-emily ’s lost a lot of weight . [I]0-i hate that [I]0-i ’ve put [her]91-emily through this shit . [I]0-i sip [my]0-i coffee , and [I]0-i feel a hand rest on [my]0-i shoulder . “ Hey , ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan says as [he]135-tristan sits down beside [me]0-i on a stool . “ Hi . ”[135-tristan] “ Looking for [Emily]91-emily ? ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan says casually . “ Nope . ”[135-tristan] “ Liar , ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan replies with a cheeky grin . “ Hey , [the boys]982-the boys and [I]135-tristan have organized a trip to [Vegas]39-vegas for [us]4529-us this weekend . [The jet]4530-the jet ’s all lined up . ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i screw up [my]0-i face . [I]0-i could think of nothing worse . “ It ’ll be great . Drinking , gambling . Join [some beautiful women to [the Miles - High Club]9-miles - high club]4531-some beautiful women to the miles - high club . [You]0-i need to snap out of this and get back on the horse . [I]135-tristan ’m thinking [a blonde or two]4532-a blonde or two . . . forget about [the brunettes]4533-the brunettes for a while , and besides , [we]4529-us need to celebrate [your]0-i innocence . [Elliot]155-elliot and [Christopher]156-christopher fly in on Friday . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan winks as [he]135-tristan tries to sweeten the deal . “ Yeah , that sounds completely shit , ”[0-i] [I]0-i mutter dryly . “ [I]0-i do n’t care what [you]135-tristan say . [You]135-tristan ’re coming . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stare straight ahead . [I]0-i ’ve lost the ability to get excited about anything lately . [He]135-tristan falls serious . “ [I]135-tristan ’m worried about [you]135-tristan , [Jay]158-jay . ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . “ [We]4534-we all are . [You]135-tristan ’re acting completely out of character . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i ’m fine , ”[0-i] [I]0-i murmur into [my]0-i coffee . [I]0-i look around once more , remembering why [I]0-i ’m here . “ Why do n’t [you]0-i just go to [[her]4535-her house]1636-her house if [you]0-i want to see [her]4535-her ? ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan says . “ [I]135-tristan tried that last night . ”[135-tristan] “ How did it go ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i puff air into [my]0-i cheeks . “ [She]4535-her went postal and . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause as [I]0-i try to explain the situation . “ [I]0-i took [her]4535-her yellow roses , and [she]4535-her smashed the fuck out of them like [a madman]4439-a madman . ”[0-i] “ Yeah ? ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan smirks and then smiles broadly as if impressed . “ Why would [you]0-i take [her]4535-her yellow roses and not red ones ? ”[135-tristan] “ [I]0-i thought . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i exhale heavily . “ [I]0-i thought yellow was safe , signifying friendship so that [she]4535-her would talk to [me]0-i . [I]0-i just wanted to talk to [her]4535-her . ”[0-i] “ [You]0-i did n’t tell [her]4535-her that , though , did [you]0-i ? ”[135-tristan] “ Yeah . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan gives a subtle shake of the head as if [I]0-i ’m stupid . “ How did that go down ? ”[135-tristan] “ That ’s about the time [she]4535-her turned into [the Hulk]213-the hulk . ”[135-tristan] “ [I]0-i do n’t blame [her]4535-her , to be honest . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes flick to [him]135-tristan in question . “ [You]0-i well and truly fucked [her]4535-her over . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i did not fuck [her]4535-her over , ”[0-i] [I]0-i spit . “ [I]0-i ’m trying to protect [her]4535-her . ”[0-i] “ Listen , [you]0-i can lie to [yourself]0-i all [you]0-i want to . But do n’t bother lying to [me]0-i . [You]0-i ’re [a bad liar]4538-a bad liar . . . the worst . ”[0-i] “ Fuck off , [man]3269-man ; it ’s too early for this shit . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh . “ [Tristan]135-tristan , ”[0-i] [the girl behind the counter]2576-the girl behind the counter calls . [He]135-tristan stands and gets [his]135-tristan coffee and slaps [me]0-i on the back . “ [You]0-i staying [here]275-here , being [a miserable prick]4541-a miserable prick ? ”[135-tristan] “ Fuck off , ”[0-i] [I]0-i grunt . [He]135-tristan smiles and leaves without another word . [I]0-i exhale heavily and stare back down at [my]0-i coffee . [I]0-i get a vision of the hurt on [Emily]91-emily ’s face last night , and [my]0-i chest constricts . [I]0-i keep going over and over it in [my]0-i mind , and [I]0-i just want to know that [she]91-emily ’s all right . Maybe then [I]0-i can forgive [myself]0-i and stop thinking about [her]91-emily every minute of every day . [I]0-i take out [my]0-i phone . [I]0-i ’ll call [her]91-emily . No , [she]91-emily will only hang up . [I]0-i ’ll text . . . what will [I]0-i write ? Good morning . Murder any roses today ? [I]0-i hit send and wait . [I]0-i drink [my]0-i coffee and stare at [my]0-i phone as [I]0-i wait for [her]91-emily to reply . . . [she]91-emily does n’t . Twenty minutes later , [I]0-i text [her]91-emily again . Please talk to [me]0-i . [I]0-i order another coffee as [I]0-i wait . It ’s 8:15 a.m. , and [I]0-i know [she]91-emily has n’t started work yet . [I]0-i also know that [she]91-emily would have [her]91-emily phone on [her]91-emily and is purposely ignoring [my]0-i texts . Fuck this . [I]0-i dial [her]91-emily number , and it rings . . . [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes as [I]0-i wait . It rings and then declines . Fuck . [She]91-emily hit reject . [I]0-i text [her]91-emily . Answer [your]91-emily phone or [I]0-i ’m coming over there . [My]0-i text does n’t go through . . . huh ? [I]0-i call again , and the call wo n’t connect . What ’s going on ? [I]0-i try again . . . nothing . For ten minutes , [I]0-i continue to try to get through . [I]0-i ca n’t . What ’s going on ? [I]0-i type into Google , “ Why ca n’t [I]0-i text or call [someone]401-someone ? ”[0-i] The answer bounces back that cuts to the bone . “ [You]0-i ’ve been blocked . ”[91-emily] [She]91-emily blocked [my]0-i number ? What the fuck ? Anger surges through [me]0-i ; [nobody]3121-nobody has ever blocked [me]0-i before . Not in business or personal . . . and never [a woman]381-a woman . [She]91-emily really does n’t want to be friends with [me]0-i . . . in any shape or form . [My]0-i heart sinks . How the hell did [I]0-i fuck this up so badly ? [I]0-i stare at [the Miles Media building through the window]2579-the miles media building through the window , and the thought of going [there]3073-there today and playing the facade that everything ’s okay is just too much . [I]0-i text [Tristan]135-tristan . [I]0-i ’m taking the day off . See [you]2581-you tomorrow . [I]0-i sit and finish [my]0-i coffee , and a song comes on—“Bad Liar ”[214-imagine dragons] by [Imagine Dragons]214-imagine dragons . [I]0-i listen . . . [Tristan]135-tristan just called [me]0-i [a bad liar]4538-a bad liar , and ironically , the lyrics ring true . With a sad damnation to hell , [I]0-i drag [myself]0-i out of [the café]2583-the café and into [a cab]3509-a cab . “ Where to ? ”[2585-the cab driver] [the cab driver]2585-the cab driver asks . “ [Park Avenue]21-park avenue . ”[2585-the cab driver] [The cab]858-the cab pulls out into the traffic , and [I]0-i put [my]0-i headphones in , hit Spotify , and listen to the song again . “ Bad Liar ”[0-i] . . . [my]0-i new anthem . [I]0-i flick through the travel images on Google . [I]0-i ’m going to take a skiing trip . [Switzerland]67-switzerland , [I]0-i think . [I]0-i need to get away . [New York]3-new york is just too small . . . or suffocating . . . or life threatening . . . or something that [I]0-i just ca n’t quite put [my]0-i finger on . Either way , [I]0-i ’m getting the hell out of here . [She]2587-she blocked [me]0-i . [I]0-i might work from [London]8-london for a while . . . yeah , [I]0-i could do that . Would make sense . And [I]0-i would get to spend more time with [Elliot]155-elliot and [Christopher]156-christopher . [My]0-i heart drops as [I]0-i remember [someone else who lives in [London]8-london]2588-someone else who lives in london . [I]0-i ’d be closer to [Claudia]122-claudia , and [I]0-i broke [her]122-claudia heart the other day again too . [She]122-claudia wanted [me]0-i back , and [I]0-i told [her]122-claudia that [I]0-i do n’t think [I]0-i ever loved [her]122-claudia . . . [she]122-claudia got angry , and basically , it ’s a fucked - up situation all around . No , [I]0-i ca n’t work out of [London]8-london . . . too complicated . Scratch that idea . How long will [I]0-i go to [Switzerland]67-switzerland for ? [I]0-i go over the dates . Maybe a month ? Hmm . . . [I]0-i bring up [my]0-i work diary and begin to go through it . [I]0-i ’m owed a lot of holidays , and [I]0-i guess [I]0-i may as well take some . [My]0-i security phone goes off , and [I]0-i answer . “ Hello . ”[0-i] “ Good afternoon , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles . [Mrs. Miles]215-mrs. miles is here in [the foyer]799-the foyer to see [you]0-i . ”[0-i] [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes . Shit . “ Yes , thank [you]403-my mother . Please let [her]215-mrs. miles in . ”[0-i] Moments later [the elevator]428-the elevator doors open , and [[my]0-i mother]403-my mother steps out . [Her]403-my mother face lights up when [she]403-my mother sees [me]0-i . “ Hello , [darling]3152-darling . ”[403-my mother] “ Hi , [Mom]105-mom . ”[403-my mother] [She]403-my mother takes [me]0-i into [her]403-my mother arms and holds [me]0-i close for a moment as if sensing something is off . “ What are [you]403-my mother doing [here]275-here ? ”[403-my mother] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i pull out of [her]403-my mother arms . “ [I]403-my mother should ask [you]0-i the same thing , ”[403-my mother] [she]403-my mother replies as [she]403-my mother follows [me]0-i and sits down on the couch . “ [I]403-my mother just . . . ”[403-my mother] [I]0-i pause as [I]0-i try to articulate [my]0-i lie . “ [I]0-i just need some time off after all that embezzlement shit . ”[0-i] [Her]403-my mother eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ Good , [I]403-my mother ’m glad . ”[403-my mother] “ Can [I]0-i get [you]403-my mother anything ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i stand , uncomfortable lying to [her]403-my mother . “ Some tea , please , [darling]3152-darling . ”[0-i] [I]0-i walk into [the kitchen]818-the kitchen and begin to make [her]403-my mother tea . [I]0-i take out [her]403-my mother fine china pink - and - gold teapot and cup , the one [she]403-my mother always drinks from when [she]403-my mother ’s [here]275-here . [She]403-my mother follows [me]0-i and sits at the kitchen counter . “ Did [Tristan]135-tristan send [you]403-my mother ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask with [my]0-i back to [her]403-my mother . “ [He]135-tristan ’s worried about [you]403-my mother . ”[0-i] “ [I]403-my mother ’m fine , [Mom]105-mom . ”[403-my mother] “ [I]403-my mother ’ll be the judge of that . What ’s going on with [Emily]91-emily ? ”[403-my mother] “ Nothing . ”[0-i] “ Why not ? ”[403-my mother] “ [Emily]91-emily and [I]403-my mother are n’t together anymore . ”[403-my mother] “ Because ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i keep making the tea . “ Look at [me]0-i , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[0-i] [I]0-i drag [my]0-i eyes to [hers]403-my mother . “ Why are n’t [you]0-i with [Emily]91-emily anymore ? ”[403-my mother] [she]403-my mother asks . “ [Emily]91-emily deserves better . ”[403-my mother] [She]403-my mother watches [me]0-i . “ [Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara . ”[403-my mother] [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i get [my]0-i wording right . “ [I]0-i do n’t want this life for [her]91-emily . ”[0-i] “ [You]0-i do n’t want [her]91-emily being with [a workaholic]3726-a workaholic , [you]0-i mean ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug as [I]0-i pass [her]403-my mother the cup of tea . “ So , [you]0-i ended it with [her]91-emily . . . for [her]91-emily ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i purse [my]0-i lips as [I]0-i remain silent . “ Well that proves it , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[0-i] “ Proves what ? ”[403-my mother] “ That [she]91-emily ’s the one . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ [You]0-i know , ever since [you]0-i were [a tiny little boy]4548-a tiny little boy , [you]0-i ’ve done this . ”[0-i] “ Done what ? ”[403-my mother] What is [she]403-my mother talking about ? “ When [you]0-i were very little , maybe three or four years old , [you]0-i used to have [this little pale - blue pickup truck]4549-this little pale - blue pickup truck . ”[403-my mother] [I]0-i listen . “ [You]0-i loved it . It fit in the palm of [your]0-i hand , and [you]0-i always carried it around . It was [your]0-i pride and joy . ”[403-my mother] [I]0-i smile softly . “ The thing is , [Tristan]135-tristan loved it too . [He]135-tristan had [his]135-tristan own , but [yours]0-i was [the special one]4550-the special one . And even though [you]0-i loved [that truck]4551-that truck with all of [your]0-i heart , the moment that [Tristan]135-tristan got upset about anything . . . [you]0-i would give it to [him]135-tristan . [You]0-i could n’t stand seeing [him]135-tristan upset , and [you]0-i felt responsible to make [him]135-tristan happy . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ As [you]0-i grew up , [I]0-i watched [you]0-i do this many times , [Jameson]126-jameson , with many things . To [the outside world]1337-the outside world [you]0-i were aloof and cold , but for [the ones [you]0-i loved]4553-the ones you loved , [you]0-i would do anything to make [them]4553-the ones you loved happy . [You]0-i have more heart than sense . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes hold [hers]2593-you . “ Why do [you]2593-you think that [Emily]91-emily would n’t be happy with [you]2593-you ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i stare at [her]2593-you for a moment as a clusterfuck of emotion runs through [me]0-i . “ Because eventually , [I]0-i ’m going to let [her]91-emily down , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [Her]2593-you face softens . “ [Jameson]126-jameson darling , how ? By working too hard ? By being too honorable to [your]2593-you family business ? ”[2593-you] [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes . “ [I]2593-you ’m in love with [a man just like [you]2593-you]4554-a man just like you , [Jameson]126-jameson . [You]2593-you know [him]4554-a man just like you well , [[your]2593-you father]4441-your father . [He]4554-a man just like you , like [you]2593-you , is [a workaholic]3726-a workaholic . ”[2593-you] “ How . . . ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ [I]0-i do n’t know how to do both , [Mom]105-mom . ”[0-i] “ Then work it out . ”[2593-you] [I]0-i stare at [her]2593-you . “ [Emily]91-emily loves [you]2593-you , [Jameson]126-jameson , not [your]2593-you money . . . or [[your]2593-you company]4557-your company . [She]91-emily loves [you]2593-you . . . just [you]2593-you . ”[0-i] [I]0-i drop [my]0-i head . “ Stop being so damn selfless , and do what [you]2593-you want to do . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i do n’t know what that is anymore , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Oh , nonsense , ”[2593-you] [she]2593-you snaps . “ Tell [me]2593-you something . If [you]2593-you were on [a deserted island]4558-a deserted island , who would [you]2593-you want by [your]2593-you side ? ”[2593-you] “ [Emily]91-emily , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper without hesitation . “ Being in love is like being on [a deserted island]4558-a deserted island , [Jameson]126-jameson . [You]2593-you focus on [them]4560-them and [them]4560-them only , and [you]2593-you make everything else fit around [that person]399-that person . ”[0-i] [I]0-i inhale deeply . “ If [you]2593-you do n’t want to travel into the future with [her]399-that person , do n’t . But do n’t [you]2593-you dare pull away from [your]2593-you own happiness to protect [her]399-that person . ”[0-i] [I]0-i clench [my]0-i jaw as [I]0-i listen . “ How [one man]4562-one man can be so ruthless in business and so giving to those [he]4562-one man loves , [I]2594-i will never understand . . . but , the fact that [[your]0-i father]4441-your father is [your]0-i carbon copy , [I]2594-i know it ’s possible . ”[2594-i] [She]2594-i cups [my]0-i face in [her]2594-i hand . “ [The man [I]2594-i love]4564-the man i love and [the man that [the world]268-the world knows]4565-the man that the world knows are [two very different men]4567-two very different men . . . and that ’s just how [I]2594-i like it . [I]2594-i like that [I]2594-i ’m the only one who gets [his]4441-your father softness . ”[2594-i] [I]0-i smile softly . “ [I]0-i am [[[your]0-i father]4441-your father ’s world]4569-your father ’s world , [Jameson]126-jameson ; [he]4441-your father made it work around [the company]3166-the company . Never once have [I]0-i felt neglected or unloved . [I]0-i have always come first to [him]4441-your father . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stare at [her]2595-her as [her]2595-her words roll around in [my]0-i head . “ [The man that [Emily]91-emily loves and the one that [you]0-i think [you]0-i are]4571-the man that emily loves and the one that you think you are are [two very different men]4567-two very different men . [You]0-i need to allow [yourself]0-i to be who [you]0-i are with [Emily]91-emily and be [the Jameson Miles that [the world]268-the world knows]4573-the jameson miles that the world knows . It ’s not one or the other like [you]0-i think it is . The fact that [you]0-i have put [Emily]91-emily ’s happiness ahead of [your]0-i own cements that [she]91-emily is [the one who has been chosen for [you]0-i]4575-the one who has been chosen for you . ”[2595-her] “ [She]91-emily wo n’t speak to [me]0-i , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [She]2596-she stands . “ Then make [her]91-emily listen . ”[2596-she] [She]2596-she takes [me]0-i into [her]2596-she arms . “ Go and get [your]0-i love , and grab [her]91-emily with both hands . . . and never let [her]91-emily go . ”[2596-she] [She]2596-she kisses [me]0-i on the cheek and , without another word , leaves [[my]0-i apartment]940-my apartment . [[My]0-i mother]403-my mother ’s words ring [home]3076-home , loud and clear . [You]2600-you need to allow [yourself]2600-you to be who [you]2600-you are with [Emily]91-emily and be [the Jameson Miles]126-jameson that [the world]268-the world knows . It ’s not one or the other like [you]2600-you think it is . It ’s five o’clock in the morning , and [I]0-i lie and stare at the ceiling of [[my]0-i living room]2602-my living room from [my]0-i couch . [I]0-i ’m still fully dressed in the clothes [I]0-i wore yesterday . [I]0-i have n’t slept all night . [[My]0-i mother]403-my mother ’s words keep going over and over in [my]0-i head . [She]403-my mother thinks that [I]0-i can be both [the man that [Emily]91-emily wants]2604-the man that emily wants and [the man that [I]0-i need to be]2605-the man that i need to be . As [I]0-i see it , [I]0-i have three options . The first is to walk away from [Miles Media]12-miles media so that [I]0-i can be [a man worth being with]2606-a man worth being with . The second is to let [Emily]91-emily leave [my]0-i life forever . [My]0-i stomach twists as [I]0-i imagine living [my]0-i life without [her]91-emily . The third is to try to be both . . . is it truly possible to live as [two men]2607-two men ? [I]0-i stand , and for the first time in a long time , [I]0-i have crystal - clear clarity . Fuck this . [I]0-i ’m going to try , and if [I]0-i ca n’t make it work , [I]0-i will leave [Miles Media]103-miles media . [I]0-i ’m getting [[my]0-i girl]3996-my girl back . [She]91-emily comes first . Chapter 25 [Emily]91-emily [I]0-i close down [my]0-i computer and pack up [my]0-i desk and make [my]0-i way to [the elevator]428-the elevator . [I]0-i ’m one of the last to leave [the office]444-the office . It ’s been a long day , but [I]0-i achieved a lot . It ’s the weirdest thing — blocking [Jameson]126-jameson yesterday was the most satisfying thing [I]0-i ’ve done since [I]0-i murdered [his]126-jameson roses . In some kind of sick and twisted way , being mean to [him]126-jameson is releasing some of [my]0-i anger . Hurting [him]126-jameson is like the best kind of therapy . [I]0-i must really be messed up at the moment ; either that , or payback is just surprisingly satisfying . [I]0-i watched the movie [John Wick]216-john wick last night , and [I]0-i smiled the whole way through it . . . that in itself says a lot about [my]0-i current headspace . [I]0-i take [the elevator]428-the elevator and walk out onto [the street]654-the street . It ’s dark and cold , and [I]0-i pull [my]0-i heavy coat around [my]0-i shoulders for protection . “ [Emily]91-emily , ”[0-i] [I]0-i hear a voice from behind [me]0-i . [I]0-i stop on the spot . . . shit . [Jameson]126-jameson . . . what ’s [he]126-jameson doing here ? [I]0-i put [my]0-i head down and keep walking . “ [Emily]91-emily , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson repeats . [I]0-i spin toward [him]126-jameson . “ What , [Jameson]126-jameson ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ Can [I]0-i talk to [you]126-jameson ? ”[0-i] “ No . Go away . ”[0-i] [I]0-i turn away from [him]126-jameson and start to storm to [[my]0-i bus stop]2613-my bus stop . [He]126-jameson follows [me]0-i as [I]0-i walk . “ [I]126-jameson just want five minutes of [your]0-i time . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i stay silent . [He]126-jameson runs to catch up with [me]0-i . “ [I]126-jameson know [I]126-jameson fucked up . . . bad . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i glare at [him]126-jameson as [I]0-i imagine punching [his]126-jameson stupid , handsome face . [I]0-i get a vision of [his]126-jameson head snapping back as [I]0-i connect the hit . “ Please , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson stammers as [he]126-jameson runs after [me]0-i . “ [I]126-jameson need to explain why . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]0-i ’m not interested . ”[0-i] [I]0-i march forward . [He]126-jameson follows [me]0-i for a while longer as if not sure what to say . “ [I]126-jameson ’m going to follow [you]0-i until [you]0-i talk to [me]126-jameson . Can [we]4576-we get a drink or something ? ”[126-jameson] “ No . ”[126-jameson] “ Dinner ? ”[126-jameson] “ Go . Away . [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson ’m not leaving [you]0-i , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson stammers as [he]126-jameson runs to keep up with [me]0-i . “ [You]0-i already did . Get out of [my]126-jameson face . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson runs in front of [me]0-i and walks backward facing [me]0-i . “ [I]126-jameson mean , [I]126-jameson ’m not leaving [you]0-i again . . . ever . ”[126-jameson] “ Then it ’s going to be a one - sided relationship because [I]126-jameson want nothing to do with [you]0-i . Ever again . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson face falls . “ Do n’t say that . ”[126-jameson] [A man]3093-a man runs into [him]126-jameson as [he]126-jameson walks backward . “ Watch out , ”[265-the man] [the man]265-the man snaps as [he]265-the man brushes past . “ [I]126-jameson just want ten minutes of [your]0-i time , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson stammers . “ No . ”[126-jameson] [We]2616-we arrive at [[my]0-i bus stop]2613-my bus stop , and [I]0-i stand in line . [He]126-jameson stands next to [me]0-i . “ [Alan]152-alan can come and get [us]2616-we , [you]0-i know ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson looks at the long line of [people]267-people . “ [We]2616-we do n’t have to catch [the bus]2539-the bus . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i glare at [him]126-jameson , unimpressed . [Spoiled brat]2619-spoiled brat . [He]126-jameson smiles . “ [You]0-i ’re still gorgeous when [you]0-i ’re angry . . . [you]0-i know that ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says loudly , and [other people in the bus line]2620-other people in the bus line begin to look over . Red steam shoots from [my]0-i ears at [him]126-jameson making a scene . “ [Jameson]126-jameson , go the fuck [home]3076-home , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper angrily . “ No . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson folds [his]126-jameson arms in front of [him]126-jameson like [a petulant teenager]2621-a petulant teenager . “ [I]126-jameson ’m not leaving without [you]0-i . ”[126-jameson] [People around [us]2623-us]2622-people around us are all watching . [I]0-i take out [my]0-i Kindle and open it . . . anything to block [him]126-jameson out . “ What are [you]126-jameson reading ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i remain silent as [I]0-i pretend to read . Damn [him]126-jameson . . . [he]126-jameson thinks [he]126-jameson can turn up here and demand to see [me]0-i . . . [he]126-jameson can kiss [my]0-i ass . “ [I]126-jameson ’m reading a good book at the moment , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson continues . [I]0-i keep reading . “ It ’s called . . . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson pauses as [he]126-jameson thinks for a moment . “ It ’s called ‘ how to get [[your]126-jameson girl]4579-your girl back after a midlife crisis . ’ ”[126-jameson] [The girls behind [me]0-i]2624-the girls behind me snicker . [I]0-i twist [my]0-i lips to try and hide [my]0-i amusement . Do n’t get fucking cute now , [asshole]3711-asshole . “ Chapter one is called ‘ bus duty , ’ ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson continues . [I]0-i bite the inside of [my]0-i cheek . “ Yes , it says to follow [her]4579-your girl to [the bus stop]4580-the bus stop and keep talking aimlessly until [she]4579-your girl gets sick of the sound of [your]126-jameson voice and has to talk to [you]126-jameson . . . even if that first word is shut up . . . that ’s something , right ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i flick the page of [my]0-i Kindle over as [I]0-i stop [myself]0-i from playing into [his]126-jameson hands and saying the words shut up . [The girls behind [me]0-i]2624-the girls behind me snicker again . [I]0-i glare at [my]0-i Kindle . [I]0-i wo n’t be surprised if the screen breaks under the pressure . “ What does chapter two say ? ”[2627-the girl behind me] [the girl behind [me]0-i]2627-the girl behind me asks as [the bus]2539-the bus arrives and pulls to a stop . [I]0-i jump on . “ Get on [the bus]2539-the bus , ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i hear [him]126-jameson say from behind [me]0-i . [I]0-i walk on and take a window seat at the back , and [he]126-jameson comes and sits beside [me]0-i . Are [you]0-i kidding [me]0-i ? “ This is a great seat , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . “ [I]126-jameson like it . ”[126-jameson] “ Stop talking to [me]0-i , ”[0-i] [I]0-i growl . “ [I]0-i ca n’t . [You]126-jameson see , [I]0-i ’ve finally worked it out . And [I]0-i need [you]126-jameson to listen to [me]0-i so that [we]4582-we can sort this mess out . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stare out the window . “ [I]0-i mean , how can [we]4582-we fix this if [you]126-jameson wo n’t speak to [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] “ [We]4582-we wo n’t . That ’s the point , ”[0-i] [I]0-i mutter dryly . “ Do n’t say that , [FB]180-dear fb . ”[0-i] [I]0-i glare at [him]126-jameson as a glow of red covers the sky . . . do n’t fight ; do n’t give [him]126-jameson the satisfaction . [He]126-jameson smiles sweetly , totally oblivious to [my]0-i rage . “ It ’s so good to see [you]0-i . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes and look back out the window . . . do n’t talk to [him]126-jameson . . . not one word . . . do n’t give in to [him]126-jameson . “ [God]88-god . . . [I]126-jameson ’ve missed [you]0-i , [Em]91-emily , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . Something inside of [me]0-i breaks . “ [You]126-jameson do n’t get to say that , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ But it ’s true . ”[0-i] “ Shut up , [Jameson]126-jameson . The time for talking is over . ”[126-jameson] [The bus]2539-the bus pulls up to [my]0-i stop , and [I]0-i get up and brush past [him]126-jameson . [He]126-jameson runs after [me]0-i as [I]0-i storm up [the pavement]708-the pavement . “ [I]126-jameson ’m not leaving until [you]126-jameson talk to [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i keep walking . “ [I]0-i ’ll wait out here all night . ”[0-i] [I]0-i keep walking . “ [Em]91-emily , come on , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson sighs . [I]0-i keep walking . “ How can [you]0-i be so cold ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson demands . [I]0-i turn like the devil [himself]126-jameson . “ Do n’t [you]126-jameson dare call [me]126-jameson cold , [you]126-jameson hypocrite . [You]0-i ’re the only fucking cold one here . ”[126-jameson] “ There [she]4583-she is . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles as if proud of [himself]126-jameson for getting [me]0-i to say something . [My]0-i face falls at [my]0-i own weakness . “ [Jameson]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [Babe]3279-babe . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson grabs [my]0-i two hands in [his]126-jameson . “ Please talk to [me]126-jameson . [I]126-jameson miss [you]0-i , and [I]126-jameson know [you]0-i miss [me]126-jameson too . [I]126-jameson need to make this right between [us]4585-us ; [we]4585-us can make it through this . ”[126-jameson] Tears well in [my]0-i eyes at [his]126-jameson touch , and [I]0-i ’m angry with [myself]0-i for letting [him]126-jameson get this close . “ [I]0-i ca n’t . ”[0-i] [I]0-i brush past [him]126-jameson . “ Please , [Em]91-emily , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson calls from behind [me]0-i . “ [I]126-jameson ’ll beg . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i keep walking . “ Do [you]126-jameson want [me]0-i to get on [my]0-i knees right here ? Because [I]0-i will . ”[0-i] [I]0-i keep walking , and [he]126-jameson runs up behind [me]0-i . “ Tell [me]126-jameson how to make this right ? Tell [me]126-jameson what to do , and [I]126-jameson ’ll do it . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i turn to [him]126-jameson . “ Move on . . . [I]0-i have . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson face falls . “ Okay . . . [I]126-jameson deserved that . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]0-i did n’t . ”[0-i] [I]0-i push through tears as [I]0-i brush past [him]126-jameson and keep walking . “ [I]126-jameson know , [Em]91-emily , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson calls . “ [I]126-jameson ’m so sorry . [That guy]3740-that guy . . . [that guy]3740-that guy was crazy to let [you]91-emily go . [I]126-jameson was out of [my]126-jameson fucking head . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i get to [[my]0-i building]848-my building , and [he]126-jameson comes up behind [me]0-i as [I]0-i open the door with [my]0-i key . [He]126-jameson slides [his]126-jameson arm around [my]0-i waist from behind and pulls [me]0-i close . “ Please , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson murmurs into [my]0-i hair . “ [I]126-jameson love [you]0-i . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes in pain at the feel of [his]126-jameson touch . . . [I]0-i miss [him]126-jameson . [I]0-i pull out of [his]126-jameson grip . “ Do n’t touch [me]0-i , ”[0-i] [I]0-i spit . “ What makes [you]0-i think [you]0-i can come back here and say that ? ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson eyes search [mine]0-i . “ Because [you]0-i love [me]126-jameson . . . and two wrongs do n’t make a right . If [you]0-i do n’t let [me]126-jameson make this right between [us]4588-we out of stubbornness , which is a real possibility . . . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson pauses as [he]126-jameson tries to get the wording right . “ [We]4588-we will both regret it forever ; [you]0-i know [we]4588-we will . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson for a moment as [his]126-jameson words roll around in [my]0-i head . [I]0-i turn and walk into [[my]0-i building]848-my building and close the door behind [me]0-i . [He]126-jameson watches [me]0-i through the glass . [I]0-i hit the elevator button , and the doors open straightaway . [I]0-i dive in and hit the buttons to close the doors as [my]0-i tears well in [my]0-i eyes . [Bastard]2633-bastard . [I]0-i walk out of [[my]0-i building]848-my building right at eight o’clock in the morning . [I]0-i have n’t slept much , and [I]0-i keep seeing [Jameson]126-jameson ’s sad face when [I]0-i left [him]126-jameson last night . [I]0-i hate that [I]0-i care about [him]126-jameson . [His]126-jameson words kept playing over and over in [my]0-i head all night . [I]0-i hate that [he]126-jameson said them . [I]0-i hate that they made sense . “ Because [you]0-i love [me]0-i . . . and two wrongs do n’t make a right . If [you]0-i do n’t let [me]0-i make this right between [us]4589-we out of stubbornness , which is a real possibility . . . [we]4589-we will both regret it forever ; [you]0-i know [we]4589-we will . ”[0-i] God , what a mess . “ Good morning , ”[0-i] [I]0-i hear a chirpy voice from behind [me]0-i . [Jameson]126-jameson is standing beside [my]0-i door in [his]126-jameson navy suit , looking all dapper and not at all discouraged like [he]126-jameson should be . “ What are [you]126-jameson doing here ? ”[126-jameson] “ Waiting for [you]0-i . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles as [he]126-jameson takes [my]0-i gym bag from [me]0-i and puts it over [his]126-jameson shoulder . “ Are [we]4589-we catching [the bus]2539-the bus today ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i look at [him]126-jameson deadpan . “ [I]126-jameson ’m catching [the bus]2539-the bus . What [you]126-jameson ’re doing . . . [I]126-jameson have no idea . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson ’m following [you]126-jameson around until [you]126-jameson agree to have dinner with [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] “ It ’s not happening , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] “ Okay , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says as [he]126-jameson begins to walk to [the bus stop]4580-the bus stop . “ [I]126-jameson ’ll just be following [you]0-i around for forever , then . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson , and [he]126-jameson gives [me]0-i a slow , sexy smile . “ [You]0-i look beautiful today . ”[126-jameson] “ Stop it . ”[126-jameson] “ No . ”[0-i] [I]0-i walk to [the bus stop]4580-the bus stop with [him]126-jameson beside [me]0-i . [I]0-i ’m staying silent , and [he]126-jameson is jabbering . “ Did [you]0-i run this morning ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks . “ [I]126-jameson did . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson . “ [I]126-jameson ’m actually quite fit at the moment — all this heartache has [me]126-jameson running at record speed , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson continues . That makes two of [us]2637-we . . . [I]0-i keep [my]0-i mouth tightly closed . [I]0-i do n’t want [him]126-jameson to know that [I]0-i ’ve been angry running too . [We]2637-we catch [the bus]2539-the bus . [I]0-i ’m silent , and [he]126-jameson ’s carrying on like [we]2637-we are long - lost best friends . “ Do [you]0-i want to go camping this weekend ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks as [he]126-jameson opens [his]126-jameson paper . “ No . [I]0-i ’m going to [[my]0-i parents]1276-my parents this weekend , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply flatly . “ Oh . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson face falls . “ Well , that ’s going to be uncomfortable . ”[126-jameson] “ What is ? ”[126-jameson] “ When [I]126-jameson follow [you]126-jameson to [[your]126-jameson parents]3511-your parents . ”[126-jameson] “ [You]126-jameson are not coming to [[my]0-i parents]1276-my parents , ”[0-i] [I]0-i scoff . “ Watch [me]0-i . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson eyes dance with mischief . “ [You]0-i wo n’t talk to [me]126-jameson ; [I]126-jameson ’m going to keep following [you]0-i until [you]0-i do . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson do n’t want [you]0-i to follow [me]126-jameson . In fact , [I]126-jameson do n’t want anything to do with [you]0-i . ”[126-jameson] “ No need to be snarky , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says casually as [he]126-jameson turns the page of [his]126-jameson paper . “ It ’s unbecoming . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i glare at [him]126-jameson . “ [You]126-jameson know what ’s unbecoming ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper angrily . “ Jerks who break [girls]3583-girls ’ hearts and think that [they]3583-girls can snap [their]3583-girls fingers and get [her]3583-girls back at the drop of a hat . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson smirks down at [me]0-i . “ Yes , [I]126-jameson have to agree . Although if [they]4596-they are meant to be together , and [he]126-jameson was under the impression that [he]126-jameson was doing the right thing by [her]3583-girls at the time . . . ”[126-jameson] “ Oh , please , ”[0-i] [I]0-i huff . “ Can [you]126-jameson hear [yourself]126-jameson ? ”[0-i] “ Have dinner with [me]126-jameson tonight . ”[126-jameson] “ No . ”[0-i] [The bus]2539-the bus pulls up at [my]0-i stop , and [he]126-jameson stands and grabs [my]0-i gym bag and puts it back over [his]126-jameson shoulder . [I]0-i watch [him]126-jameson walk up the aisle of [the bus]2539-the bus to get off , and [I]0-i smile to [myself]0-i . Has [he]126-jameson ever caught [a bus]2641-a bus before ? [Idiot]2516-idiot . [We]2643-we walk up [the road]638-the road in silence , and [I]0-i turn and catch sight of [the limo]811-the limo parked across [the street]654-the street . [Alan]152-alan is leaning up against it , and [he]126-jameson smiles and waves over at [me]0-i . “ [Alan]152-alan knows [you]126-jameson ’re here ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i whisper in mortification . “ [Everyone]3098-everyone knows [I]126-jameson ’m here , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says casually as [he]126-jameson hands [my]0-i bag over . “ It ’s no secret that [I]126-jameson want [you]0-i back . [I]126-jameson have stated [my]126-jameson intentions loud and clear . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson . “ See [you]126-jameson this afternoon . ”[126-jameson] “ [Jameson]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh . “ [I]0-i ’m not giving up on [us]4598-us , [Em]4599-em . . . ever . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson smiles softly . “ [We]4598-us were made for each other . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i scratch [my]0-i head in frustration . “ Have a nice day . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson watches [me]0-i with [his]126-jameson hands in [his]126-jameson pockets , keeping a safe distance . “ Bye . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i turn and walk into [[my]0-i building]848-my building . [My]0-i phone beeps a text . It ’s from an unknown number . Have a good day . This is [my]0-i burner phone in case of an emergency . [Jameson]126-jameson . [He]126-jameson ’s got another phone , one that [I]0-i have n’t blocked . [I]0-i get into [the elevator]428-the elevator and find [myself]0-i smirking at the ground . Stop it . . . [he]126-jameson ’s [an asshole]785-an asshole . . . never forget that . It ’s three o’clock , and [I]0-i ’m finishing a report for publication this week . [I]0-i love this job . [I]0-i mean , not as much as [I]0-i loved [Miles Media]12-miles media , but [that ship]2650-that ship has sailed — may as well make the most of it . [The staff]274-the staff are all really friendly and nice and have welcomed [me]0-i with open arms . “ Delivery for [Emily Foster]91-emily , ”[274-the staff] [I]0-i hear . [I]0-i look up and see [a man]3093-a man walking through the floor with a white box . What the hell ? “ Oh , [she]91-emily ’s in [that office]4600-that office over there , ”[401-someone] [I]0-i hear [someone]401-someone say . [He]3093-a man knocks on [my]0-i door . “ Are [you]0-i [Emily Foster]91-emily ? ”[3093-a man] “ Yes . ”[3093-a man] “ [I]3093-a man have a delivery for [you]0-i . ”[3093-a man] [He]3093-a man hands over the white box . [I]0-i take it from [him]3093-a man . “ Thank [you]3093-a man . ”[0-i] “ Um . ”[3093-a man] [He]3093-a man smirks , shuffling awkwardly in place . “ It ’s from [the Kung Fu Panda]217-the kung fu panda . ”[3093-a man] “ What ? ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i was told to tell [you]3093-a man that [the Kung Fu Panda]217-the kung fu panda sent [it]217-the kung fu panda . ”[0-i] [I]0-i try to hide [my]0-i smile and fail miserably . “ Thank [you]3093-a man . ”[3093-a man] [He]3093-a man leaves , and [I]0-i open the box to find a huge caramel cheesecake and a small white card . Cheesecake for [my]0-i cheesecake . xoxoxo [I]0-i close the box and smirk . [He]3093-a man ’s [an idiot]2654-an idiot , and [I]0-i ’m not a cheesecake . . . if [he]3093-a man thinks [he]3093-a man can weasel [his]3093-a man way back into [my]0-i good book by being cute , [he]3093-a man has another thing coming . [Kung Fu Panda]217-the kung fu panda . . . where the hell does [he]3093-a man get this shit ? [A girl from [the office next door]2656-the office next door]2655-a girl from the office next door pops [her]2655-a girl from the office next door head around the corner . “ What ’s that ? ”[2655-a girl from the office next door] “ Cheesecake , want some ? ”[2655-a girl from the office next door] “ Hell yeah , [I]2655-a girl from the office next door ’ll get the plates . ”[2655-a girl from the office next door] [She]2655-a girl from the office next door disappears to [the kitchen]818-the kitchen . [I]0-i stare at [my]0-i phone for a moment . Should [I]0-i text [him]3093-a man and say thank [you]3093-a man ? No , this is why [he]3093-a man did it — to get a reaction . [He]3093-a man knows [I]0-i ’ve got good manners and would never receive a gift without thanking [him]3093-a man . [He]3093-a man ’ll be waiting for [my]0-i call . Well , too bad for [the stupid Kung Fu Panda]2658-the stupid kung fu panda . More fool [him]3093-a man . [He]3093-a man created this beast ; [he]3093-a man can live with [my]0-i rudeness . [He]2658-the stupid kung fu panda ’s in the freezer . At six o’clock in the evening , [I]0-i make [my]0-i way [downstairs]3304-downstairs . [I]0-i may have fixed [my]0-i hair and applied some lipstick . . . not that [I]0-i ’ll ever admit to it . [I]0-i walk out of [the building]412-the building and out onto [the street]654-the street to see [Jameson]126-jameson standing and leaning up against the wall . [He]126-jameson ’s wearing [his]126-jameson gray suit , the one that [I]0-i love . [His]126-jameson dark hair hangs over [his]126-jameson forehead , and [his]126-jameson chiseled jaw does things to [my]0-i insides . [He]126-jameson smiles broadly and pushes off the wall when [he]126-jameson sees [me]0-i coming . How long has [he]126-jameson been standing [there]3073-there ? “ Good afternoon , [Ms. Foster]146-ms. foster . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]0-i did n’t know that [you]126-jameson knew kung fu , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say as [I]0-i walk past [him]126-jameson . “ Oh , [I]126-jameson do , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says as [he]126-jameson falls into step behind [me]0-i . “ There are a lot of things about [me]126-jameson that [you]0-i do n’t know . Did [I]126-jameson tell [you]0-i that [I]126-jameson ’m becoming [an extreme sportist]4601-an extreme sportist ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i keep silent as [I]0-i walk . It ’s hard to keep a straight face when [he]126-jameson ’s in this mood . “ Yes , [I]0-i thought [I]0-i might start hiking [up mountains]4602-up mountains and camping there and stuff . Making fire with [my]0-i bare hands and whatnot . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smirk as [I]0-i walk in front of [him]126-jameson , unable to help it . “ Really ? ”[0-i] “ Uh - huh . [You]0-i see , [I]0-i ’m becoming [one with nature]4603-one with nature . ”[0-i] “ [You]126-jameson . [One with nature]4603-one with nature . [I]0-i ’d like to see that , ”[0-i] [I]0-i mutter dryly . “ Okay , [we]4605-we can hike up [a mountain]4606-a mountain this weekend . How ’s [Mount Kosciuszko]69-mount kosciuszko ? ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i ’m busy , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say as [I]0-i keep walking . “ Oh , that ’s right ; [we]4605-we are going to [[your]2663-he parents]3511-your parents this weekend . ”[0-i] “ [You]2663-he ’re not coming , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[0-i] “ [[Your]2663-he mother]3144-your mother said [I]0-i could when [I]0-i spoke to [her]3144-your mother earlier . ”[0-i] [I]0-i spin on the spot toward [him]2663-he . “ [You]2663-he called [[my]0-i mother]403-my mother ? ”[0-i] “ No , but [I]2663-he will if [you]0-i do n’t have dinner with [me]2663-he . ”[2663-he] [He]2663-he smiles hopefully . [I]0-i stare at [him]2663-he . “ [Jameson]126-jameson , if [you]2663-he think [the Kung Fu Panda]217-the kung fu panda sending [me]0-i a cake and calling [me]0-i a cheesecake can reverse the damage [you]2663-he have done , [you]2663-he are seriously deluded . ”[0-i] [He]2663-he takes [my]0-i two hands in [his]2663-he . “ [I]2663-he do n’t , [Em]91-emily , but please . . . just let [me]2663-he say what [I]2663-he need to say . ”[2663-he] [I]0-i stare at [him]2663-he . “ And then if [you]0-i do n’t want to see [me]2663-he again , [I]2663-he ’ll stop following [you]0-i . ”[2663-he] [His]2663-he eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ [We]4610-we need to talk about this ; [you]2663-he know [we]4610-we do . ”[2663-he] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . “ Please ? ”[0-i] [He]2663-he bats [his]2663-he eyelashes to try and be cute ; it ’s annoying that [he]2663-he is . “ Fine . [You]2663-he have ten minutes . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh . “ Where do [you]0-i want to go ? ”[2663-he] [He]2663-he smiles . “ Wherever is easiest . ”[2663-he] “ Okay . ”[2663-he] [He]2663-he looks around . “ How about [that Italian restaurant across [the street]654-the street]4611-that italian restaurant across the street ? ”[2663-he] “ Fine . ”[2663-he] [He]2663-he tries to take [my]0-i hand , and [I]0-i snatch it away . “ [You]2663-he have got to be kidding , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ Jesus , calm down , ”[2663-he] [he]2663-he mutters . [I]0-i follow [him]2663-he across [the street]654-the street and into [the restaurant]3510-the restaurant , and [we]2666-we take a seat at the back of [the restaurant]3510-the restaurant . [It]3510-the restaurant ’s small and darkened with candles on the tables . Red tablecloths decorate the tables . It ’s nothing like the usual upmarket Italian that [he]2663-he takes [me]0-i to , but it will have to do . “ Can [I]867-the waiter get [you]0-i some drinks ? ”[867-the waiter] [the waiter]867-the waiter asks . [Jameson]126-jameson smirks and gestures to [me]0-i . “ [I]126-jameson ’ll have what [she]4613-she ’s having . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i stare at [him]2663-he for a moment and open [my]0-i menu . “ All right , [we]4614-we ’ll have a bottle of the [Henschke Hill of Grace]148-grace , please . ”[0-i] “ Yes , [ma’am]4615-ma’am . ”[867-the waiter] [The waiter]867-the waiter disappears out the back to [the bar]534-the bar . [Jameson]126-jameson ’s eyes come to [me]0-i , and [he]126-jameson smiles softly and takes [my]0-i hands over the table . “ Do [you]0-i know how much [I]126-jameson ’ve missed [you]0-i ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson in some kind of strange detached state . “ Did [you]126-jameson miss [me]126-jameson ? ”[126-jameson] Instantly [I]0-i ’m overwhelmed with emotion . [I]0-i stay silent as [I]0-i battle the lump in [my]0-i throat . [I]0-i hate that [he]126-jameson makes [me]0-i feel so weak and vulnerable . [I]0-i pull [my]0-i hands out of [his]126-jameson grip . [I]0-i need to create some distance between [us]2671-us . “ [Em]91-emily . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson frowns . “ [I]126-jameson . . . ”[126-jameson] It ’s clear that [he]126-jameson has no idea what to say . “ When [I]126-jameson saw that image of [you]126-jameson kissing [Jake]158-jay — ”[126-jameson] “ [Jameson]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . [He]126-jameson holds [his]126-jameson hand up to signify silence , and [I]0-i close [my]0-i mouth . “ Something snapped inside of [me]0-i . [I]0-i was so thrown that it upset [me]0-i so deeply that [I]0-i . . . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson frowns as [he]126-jameson remembers it . “ [I]126-jameson was furious — firstly with [you]0-i , but then with [myself]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [Our]2672-our eyes are locked . “ [I]126-jameson was going through so much shit at work , and [the very last person on earth]4616-the very last person on earth that [I]126-jameson thought would lie to [me]126-jameson . . . was [you]0-i . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i drop [my]0-i head in shame . “ And then when [I]0-i calmed down after a few days and realized that [you]0-i had been set up , the future mapped itself out to [me]0-i . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ There is always going to be someone like [Ferrara]196-gabriel ferrara who is prepared to step on [you]0-i to hurt [me]0-i . ”[0-i] [My]0-i heart drops . “ And [I]0-i do n’t want that for [you]0-i . ”[0-i] “ [Jay]158-jay , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper sadly . “ [I]0-i do n’t want [you]0-i to be married to [a workaholic who has to travel all the time and is stressed out of [his]4617-a workaholic who has to travel all the time and is stressed out of his head head]4617-a workaholic who has to travel all the time and is stressed out of his head . [I]0-i do n’t want [you]0-i to have to remind [[your]0-i husband]4618-your husband not to drink too much or stop being rude to [people]267-people because [he]4618-your husband ’s too busy to care . [I]0-i do n’t want [you]0-i to have to remind [[your]0-i husband]4618-your husband that [he]4618-your husband ’s neglecting [you]0-i . ”[0-i] “ [Your]0-i bottle of wine . ”[867-the waiter] [The waiter]867-the waiter appears out of nowhere . [He]867-the waiter opens it and pours [us]2674-us both a glass . “ Thank [you]867-the waiter , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply . [My]0-i eyes go back to meet [[Jameson]126-jameson ’s]2675-jameson ’s . [The waiter]867-the waiter leaves [us]2674-us alone . “ [I]867-the waiter do n’t want [you]0-i to come second to [Miles Media]103-miles media . [I]867-the waiter do n’t want [you]0-i to ever come second to anything . ”[867-the waiter] “ But — ”[867-the waiter] “ Let [me]867-the waiter finish , please , ”[867-the waiter] [he]867-the waiter demands . [I]0-i sit back in [my]0-i chair , annoyed that [he]867-the waiter wants to speak first . “ The thing is , if [you]0-i ’re with [me]0-i — married to [me]0-i — [your]0-i life is going to be all those things . ”[0-i] The lump in [my]0-i throat gets big . “ [I]867-the waiter love [you]0-i too much to let [you]0-i live that life , [Em]91-emily . ”[867-the waiter] [He]867-the waiter ’s ending it again . [My]0-i eyes fill with tears . [He]867-the waiter takes [my]0-i hand over the table and lifts it to [his]867-the waiter mouth and gently kisses it . “ Do n’t cry . [I]867-the waiter hate that [you]0-i ’ve cried over [me]867-the waiter . ”[867-the waiter] [I]0-i blink to try and get rid of these stupid tears . “ [I]867-the waiter made a decision to protect [you]0-i from that life . To push [you]0-i away . Because [I]867-the waiter knew that one day , [you]0-i would eventually be unhappy . . . and [I]867-the waiter just ca n’t live with that . ”[867-the waiter] “ It was n’t [your]867-the waiter decision to make , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper angrily . [He]867-the waiter frowns . “ [My]867-the waiter job is to look after [you]0-i and make the hard calls , ones that [you]0-i ca n’t make for [yourself]0-i . ”[867-the waiter] “ [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stare at [him]867-the waiter through tears . “ But something happened while [I]0-i was away from [you]0-i . ”[0-i] [He]867-the waiter leans in and cups [my]0-i face in [his]867-the waiter hand . “ [I]867-the waiter realized that [I]867-the waiter did n’t want any of those things either . ”[867-the waiter] [My]0-i eyes search [his]867-the waiter . “ [I]867-the waiter ca n’t live without [you]0-i , [Em]91-emily . [I]867-the waiter ’ve been so fucking miserable that it ’s been unbearable . ”[867-the waiter] [He]867-the waiter leans in and kisses [me]0-i softly ; [his]867-the waiter eyes search [mine]0-i as [he]867-the waiter dusts [his]867-the waiter thumb over [my]0-i bottom lip . “ If [you]0-i do n’t want [me]867-the waiter as [I]867-the waiter am now , [I]867-the waiter ’ll resign from [Miles Media]12-miles media immediately , and [we]4621-we can move to [bumfuck nowhere]70-bumfuck nowhere and , [I]867-the waiter do n’t know , live in [a fucking tent]4622-a fucking tent somewhere . ”[867-the waiter] [I]0-i smirk . “ [[You]867-the waiter idiot]998-you idiot , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [He]867-the waiter smiles as [he]867-the waiter holds [my]0-i face in [his]867-the waiter hand . “ [I]867-the waiter love [you]0-i how [you]0-i are . [I]867-the waiter do n’t want [you]0-i to change anything . ”[867-the waiter] “ [You]867-the waiter do ? ”[867-the waiter] “ But [I]0-i do n’t . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause as [I]0-i try to articulate [my]0-i feelings . “ How can [I]0-i move on from how [you]2677-i ’ve treated [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] “ [I]867-the waiter do n’t know . ”[867-the waiter] “ [I]867-the waiter ca n’t just pretend that this has n’t happened , [Jameson]126-jameson . [You]2677-i ’ve hurt [me]867-the waiter too deeply . ”[867-the waiter] “ [I]2677-i know ; [I]2677-i do n’t want [you]0-i to , ”[2677-i] [he]2677-i stammers . “ But ca n’t [we]4624-we just . . . ”[2677-i] [He]2677-i shrugs . “ Start dating again ? Take it slow . ”[2677-i] [I]0-i stare at [him]2677-i as confusion fills [me]0-i . “ [I]0-i know it ’s going to take time to get back to where [we]4624-we were , but [we]4624-we have the rest of [our]4624-we lives . [We]4624-we can date and get to know [each other]351-each other properly this time . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sit back as [I]0-i consider [his]2677-i proposal , and [I]0-i sip [my]0-i wine . “ [You]2677-i know , [I]2677-i always imagined that [I]2677-i would find [[my]2677-i dream guy]4626-my dream guy and fall in love , and then it would come to this big cheesy climax . ”[2677-i] [He]2677-i scrunches up [his]2677-i nose . “ Cheesy climax ? That just sounds wrong . ”[2677-i] [I]0-i giggle as [I]0-i imagine what [he]2677-i must be thinking about . “ No , [I]2677-i meant proposal . ”[2677-i] “ [You]2677-i want a cheesy proposal ? ”[2677-i] [He]2677-i frowns . “ Would n’t [you]2677-i want a romantic proposal ? ”[2677-i] “ Not really . [My]2677-i point is , this is n’t how [I]2677-i imagined things would go . ”[2677-i] “ [Me]2677-i neither . ”[2677-i] [He]2677-i takes [my]0-i hands in [his]2677-i . “ Far from it . [I]2677-i ’m officially [an idiot]2654-an idiot . Give [me]2677-i another chance , [Em]91-emily . [I]2677-i wo n’t fuck it up , [I]2677-i promise . ”[2677-i] [I]0-i stare at [him]2677-i . “ [I]2677-i love [you]2677-i ; [you]2677-i love [me]2677-i . ”[2677-i] [He]2677-i shrugs . “ [We]4628-we can work through this , and then hopefully in time , [you]0-i can forget it ever happened , and [you]0-i can live happily ever after with [an outdoorsy Kung Fu Panda]4629-an outdoorsy kung fu panda . ”[2677-i] [He]2677-i smiles hopefully . “ [You]0-i ’re [an idiot]2654-an idiot , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles . ”[2677-i] “ Who ’s hopelessly in love with [you]0-i . ”[2677-i] [He]2677-i leans over and kisses [me]0-i softly , and [I]0-i feel [my]0-i resistance fade . “ [I]2677-i love [you]0-i , cheesecake , ”[2677-i] [he]2677-i whispers . “ Do n’t call [me]2677-i fucking cheesecake . ”[2677-i] [He]2677-i chuckles against [my]0-i lips . “ Too far ? ”[2677-i] “ Way too far . ”[2677-i] Chapter 26 [We]2678-we walk down [the street]654-the street toward [[my]0-i apartment]940-my apartment , hand in hand . [Jameson]126-jameson is being overattentive and talking nonstop , and [I]0-i am quiet . [I]0-i ’m annoyed that with just one dinner meeting , [I]0-i find [myself]0-i here with [him]2677-i . [I]0-i ’m officially [a pushover]2681-a pushover . Weak as water . [His]2677-i phone beeps with a text , and [he]2677-i shuffles around in [his]2677-i pocket to retrieve it and smiles . “ [Tristan]135-tristan . ”[2677-i] [He]2677-i reads the text out loud “ How did it go ? ”[2677-i] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . “ Text back , ‘ Not out of [the woods]4631-the woods yet . Still may be found dead in a ditch tomorrow . ’ ”[0-i] [Jameson]126-jameson smirks . “ No , [I]2677-i ’m not writing that . If it actually happens , [I]2677-i do n’t want [you]0-i to go to [prison]2196-prison . ”[2677-i] [He]2677-i turns to face [me]0-i and tucks a piece of [my]0-i hair behind [my]0-i ear . “ [You]0-i would n’t kill [me]2677-i . ”[2677-i] [He]2677-i leans in and kisses [me]0-i softly . [My]0-i eyes hold [his]2677-i . “ Would n’t [I]2677-i ? ”[2677-i] [He]2677-i smiles and then takes [my]0-i hand as [we]2682-we walk toward the door . [I]0-i stop on the spot . “ Good night , ”[0-i] [I]0-i announce . “ What ? ”[0-i] “ [You]2677-i ’re not coming in . ”[2677-i] “ Why not ? ”[2677-i] “ [Jameson]126-jameson , [I]0-i am still eighty percent pissed off with [you]2677-i . ”[0-i] “ Yes . [I]2677-i know . Let [me]2677-i make it up to [you]2677-i . ”[2677-i] [He]2677-i smiles darkly . [I]0-i pull out of [his]2677-i arms and step back from [him]2677-i . “ There is nothing sexual that [you]2677-i could do that would make up for how [you]2677-i have treated [me]0-i . ”[0-i] [His]2677-i face falls . “ When [I]2677-i agreed to try again , it was just that . . . to try again . [I]2677-i ’m not promising anything , and [I]2677-i do n’t know how this is going to turn out . [I]2677-i honestly do n’t know if [we]4633-we can get back what [we]4633-we had . The morning [you]2677-i left [me]2677-i after the second stopover , [you]2677-i broke something between [us]4633-we . [I]2677-i have never been so upset in all of [my]2677-i life . It was devastating for [me]2677-i . Having sex with [you]2677-i now is the very last thing that [I]2677-i want to do . ”[2677-i] “ [Em]91-emily , ”[2677-i] [he]2677-i whispers . “ [I]2677-i could n’t talk to [you]91-emily because it killed [me]2677-i to push [you]91-emily away . [I]2677-i was battling [myself]2677-i over it . ”[2677-i] “ Good night , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[2677-i] [He]2677-i looks around in a fluster . “ Well , when will [I]0-i see [you]2677-i again ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug . “ It ’s Thursday , and [I]0-i ’m away for the weekend , so next week , [I]0-i guess . ”[0-i] “ Next week ? ”[2677-i] [he]2677-i huffs . “ That ’s like four days away . ”[2677-i] “ Is it ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply flatly as [I]0-i begin to dig in [my]0-i bag for [my]0-i keys . [I]0-i really do need to get a better system in this damn handbag ; it ’s like [the fucking Bermuda Triangle in here]2683-the fucking bermuda triangle in here . “ Well , that ’s too long , ”[2677-i] [he]2677-i stammers . “ [I]2677-i have n’t seen [you]0-i for a month . [I]2677-i need more time with [you]0-i . ”[2677-i] “ Take it or leave it , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply . “ [Em]91-emily ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i turn and kiss [him]2677-i softly on the lips , and [he]2677-i snaps [his]2677-i arms around [me]0-i . [We]2684-we stay still for a few minutes in [each other]351-each other ’s arms , holding on tight and needing the closeness that [the other]1711-the other provides . [I]0-i ’ve missed [him]2677-i desperately , and it would be so easy to take [him]2677-i [upstairs]3211-upstairs right now . No . . . [I]0-i have serious trust issues that [I]0-i need to deal with . [He]2677-i needs to deal with . “ [I]2677-i ’ll sleep on [the lounge]273-the lounge , ”[2677-i] [he]2677-i whispers . “ [I]2677-i ca n’t be away from [you]0-i for one more night . Do n’t ask that of [me]2677-i . ”[2677-i] [I]0-i pull away , knowing where this is going if [I]0-i stay in [his]2677-i arms . “ Good night , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[2677-i] [His]2677-i eyes search [mine]0-i as [he]2677-i silently begs to come [upstairs]3211-upstairs . [I]0-i force a smile and open [my]0-i door as [he]2677-i stands on [the pavement]708-the pavement . [I]0-i give [him]2677-i a wave and disappear into [the elevator]428-the elevator as [he]2677-i watches on . The elevator doors close , and [I]0-i blow out a breath of relief . [Good girl]3140-good girl . . . stay strong . [I]0-i put [my]0-i lipstick on and smile at [my]0-i reflection in the mirror . [Jameson]126-jameson called [me]0-i when [he]126-jameson got [home]3076-home last night to say good night . It feels strangely good to have [him]126-jameson back in [my]0-i life . . . but for how long ? [I]0-i have this annoying little voice in [my]0-i psyche that keeps reminding [me]0-i what [he]126-jameson did and how badly [he]126-jameson treated [me]0-i . [I]0-i ’m trying to listen to [his]126-jameson reasoning and trust what [he]126-jameson ’s saying , but it ’s hard to pretend that nothing has happened between [us]2693-us . It was n’t nothing ; it was Armageddon , and [my]0-i entire world crashed at [my]0-i feet . [I]0-i do n’t like the way [I]0-i depend on [Jameson Miles]126-jameson for [my]0-i happiness . It wo n’t happen again ; [I]0-i wo n’t allow it . . . even if that means holding [him]126-jameson at arm ’s length for the rest of [my]0-i life . . . or however long [we]2693-us ’re together . See , there it is again . Negative thoughts . . . ugh . [I]0-i make [my]0-i way [downstairs]3304-downstairs with [my]0-i luggage for the weekend with [me]0-i and out the front doors to see [Jameson]126-jameson leaning up against the wall — navy suit , gorgeous face , and a swoony smile . . . just for [me]0-i . “ Good morning , [[my]126-jameson beautiful girl]4635-my beautiful girl . ”[126-jameson] “ Hi . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile up at [him]126-jameson . [He]126-jameson leans down and takes [my]0-i face in [his]126-jameson hands and kisses [me]0-i , and [I]0-i feel [my]0-i knees weaken underneath [me]0-i . “ How did [[my]126-jameson girl]3996-my girl sleep ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson takes [my]0-i hand in [his]126-jameson and takes [my]0-i suitcase from [me]0-i . “ Fine , thanks . ”[126-jameson] “ Can [we]4637-we get a civilized lift to work today ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks . [I]0-i glance over and see [Alan]152-alan and [the limo]811-the limo parked at the curb across [the street]654-the street . “ Um . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . “ [You]126-jameson go with [Alan]152-alan . [I]0-i want to catch [the bus]2539-the bus . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson raises an eyebrow as if unimpressed . “ Okay , bus it is . ”[126-jameson] “ [You]126-jameson do n’t have to walk [me]126-jameson to work , [Jameson]126-jameson . [I]126-jameson ’m quite capable of getting [myself]126-jameson [there]3073-there . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson know ; [I]126-jameson just want to spend the twenty minutes with [you]126-jameson . [I]126-jameson ’m not seeing [you]126-jameson all weekend , remember ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson gives [me]0-i a sexy wink , and [my]0-i stomach does a nervous flip . [We]2697-we walk to the bus stop hand in hand . “ Have [you]126-jameson heard anything more about [Lara Aspin]145-lara aspin and [Hayden]113-hayden ? ”[126-jameson] “ No . [They]4640-they ’ve been charged , but the court case wo n’t be for a while . [I]0-i ca n’t believe [you]126-jameson solved it . [You]126-jameson do n’t know how grateful [I]0-i am to [you]126-jameson . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile , feeling proud of [myself]0-i . “ How do [you]0-i like [your]0-i new job ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks . [I]0-i shrug . “ It ’s great . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ Great as in ‘ really great , ’ or great as in ‘ it will do ’ ? ”[126-jameson] “ Great as in ‘ [I]126-jameson ’m getting used to it . ’ ”[126-jameson] “ Why do n’t [you]126-jameson come back to [Miles Media]12-miles media ? ”[126-jameson] “ No . [I]126-jameson ’ll be keeping [our]2699-our work lives separate from now on . ”[126-jameson] “ Hmm . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson frowns , unimpressed . “ [We]2699-our ’ll see . ”[126-jameson] [The bus]2539-the bus arrives , and [we]2699-our make [our]2699-our way on . [It]2539-the bus ’s crowded today , and [I]0-i find a seat , but [Jameson]126-jameson has to stand . [He]126-jameson ’s squashed between [a smelly man]2700-a smelly man and [a woman who looks like [she]2701-a woman who looks like she has rabies has rabies]2701-a woman who looks like she has rabies . [I]0-i sit and watch [him]126-jameson and the horror on [his]126-jameson face as [he]126-jameson watches [the people around [him]126-jameson]2702-the people around him . [I]0-i have to bite [my]0-i lip to stop [myself]0-i from laughing . Eventually [the bus]2539-the bus pulls to [our]2699-our stop , and [he]126-jameson gets off in a rush . “ That ’s it , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson scoffs as [he]126-jameson brushes [his]126-jameson suit off like the snob that [he]126-jameson is . “ No more fucking buses . [We]2699-our need to be disinfected right now . Did [you]126-jameson see [the people on [that fucking bus]4642-that fucking bus]4641-the people on that fucking bus ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i giggle . “ That was just a bad trip . ”[0-i] “ [I]126-jameson mean it , [Emily]91-emily , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson snaps . “ No more fucking buses . [Alan]152-alan is now [[your]91-emily driver]4643-your driver . Over [my]126-jameson dead body are [we]2704-we catching [another bus]4644-another bus . ”[126-jameson] “ Yes , [boss]4180-boss . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile as [he]126-jameson takes [my]0-i hand in [his]126-jameson , and [we]2704-we begin [our]2704-we walk to work . “ What time does [your]91-emily flight leave tonight ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson asks . “ Three . ”[126-jameson] [His]126-jameson face falls . “ [You]91-emily ’re going early ? ”[126-jameson] “ Yes . [I]126-jameson have a half day today . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson was going to take [you]91-emily to [the airport]276-the airport . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson frowns as [he]126-jameson stares down at [me]0-i . “ [I]126-jameson have a board meeting at four ; [I]126-jameson ca n’t get out of it . ”[126-jameson] “ That ’s fine . ”[126-jameson] “ Shit . . . maybe [I]126-jameson can cancel ? ”[126-jameson] “ [Jameson]126-jameson , it ’s fine . [You]126-jameson are not canceling a meeting to take [me]126-jameson to [the airport]276-the airport . Stop it . [You]126-jameson will see [me]126-jameson when [you]126-jameson see [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson stares at [me]0-i as [he]126-jameson processes [my]0-i words . “ [Alan]152-alan will collect [you]0-i . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i nod , knowing that if [I]0-i do n’t agree , [he]126-jameson will in fact cancel [his]126-jameson meeting . “ Okay . ”[126-jameson] [We]2705-we arrive at [my]0-i work , and [he]126-jameson turns [me]0-i toward [him]126-jameson . “ [You]0-i ’ll call [me]126-jameson the minute [you]0-i land ? ”[126-jameson] “ No . ”[126-jameson] “ Why not ? ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson ’ll call [you]0-i before [I]126-jameson go to bed . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson stares at [me]0-i . “ What are [you]126-jameson doing this weekend ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [[My]0-i brothers]3514-my brothers are all going to [Vegas]39-vegas tonight . ”[0-i] “ Are [you]126-jameson ? ”[126-jameson] “ No . ”[126-jameson] “ Why not ? ”[0-i] “ [They]3514-my brothers ’re chasing booze and [wild women]4649-wild women . ”[0-i] [My]0-i face falls . [He]126-jameson wraps [his]126-jameson arms around [me]0-i . “ [I]126-jameson already have [[my]126-jameson wild woman]4650-my wild woman ; [I]126-jameson ’m not interested in what [they]3514-my brothers are looking for . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smile up at [him]126-jameson , surprisingly grateful that [he]126-jameson ’s not going . “ Will [you]0-i miss [me]126-jameson ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . “ Probably not . ”[126-jameson] “ [You]126-jameson probably could try and be flirtier in [our]2706-our conversations , [you]126-jameson know ? ”[126-jameson] “ Could [I]126-jameson ? ”[126-jameson] [Our]2706-our lips touch , and [he]126-jameson kisses [me]0-i softly . “ Are [you]0-i sure [you]0-i have to go ? ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson murmurs against [my]0-i lips . “ Yes , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]126-jameson love [you]0-i , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers . [My]0-i heart somersaults in [my]0-i chest at hearing those precious words . “ Have a nice day . ”[126-jameson] “ That ’s not what [I]126-jameson wanted to hear . ”[126-jameson] “ But that ’s all [you]126-jameson ’re getting . ”[0-i] [I]0-i kiss [him]126-jameson quickly and pull out of [his]126-jameson arms . “ Please stop pressuring [me]0-i . [I]0-i ’ll call [you]0-i tonight . ”[0-i] [He]126-jameson puts [his]126-jameson two hands into [his]126-jameson suit pockets and smiles sexily as [he]126-jameson watches [me]0-i walk into [the building]412-the building . [I]0-i get into [the elevator]428-the elevator with a hammering heart and flushed cheeks . Why is [he]126-jameson so damn gorgeous ? [I]0-i walk out of work just after one o’clock and see [the limo]811-the limo and [Alan]152-alan standing beside [it]811-the limo . [He]126-jameson smiles warmly and opens the back door as if gesturing for [me]0-i to get in . [I]0-i smile and make [my]0-i way over to [him]126-jameson . [I]0-i have n’t heard from [Jameson]126-jameson all day and was n’t sure if [Alan]152-alan was in fact coming to collect [me]0-i . “ Hello . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles warmly . “ Hello , [Emily]91-emily . It ’s so lovely to see [you]91-emily . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i get into the back of [the limo]811-the limo and find a lone red rose on the back seat , waiting for [me]0-i . Oh . [I]0-i smile and inhale it deeply ; a beautiful perfume fills [the space]863-the space . [The car]422-the car pulls out from the curb , and [I]0-i get a vision of [myself]0-i stomping on the yellow roses the other night . [Maniac]218-maniac . [I]0-i was half hoping that [Jameson]126-jameson would be in [the car]422-the car waiting for [me]0-i . Should [I]0-i even be going away right now ? Is n’t sorting this out with [him]126-jameson more important ? No . [You]2714-you had these plans before [he]126-jameson decided to waltz back in . . . stick to them . [I]0-i should call and thank [him]126-jameson , though . [I]0-i dial [his]126-jameson number . “ Hello , ”[126-jameson] [his]126-jameson sexy voice purrs down the line . [My]0-i stomach flutters at the sound of [his]126-jameson voice . “ Hi , ”[0-i] [I]0-i breathe . “ Are [you]126-jameson with [Alan]152-alan ? ”[0-i] “ [I]126-jameson am . Thank [you]126-jameson for [my]126-jameson rose . ”[126-jameson] “ So red is better ? ”[126-jameson] “ Seems that way . ”[0-i] [I]0-i feel [my]0-i face blush in embarrassment . “ Mental note to never buy anything yellow ever again . ”[0-i] [I]0-i giggle , embarrassed . “ [You]0-i have a good weekend , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson eventually replies . “ [You]0-i too . ”[126-jameson] “ [I]0-i ’m not going to call [you]126-jameson this weekend . ”[0-i] “ Why not ? ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i ask . “ [Your]126-jameson words are playing on [my]0-i mind . ”[0-i] “ What words ? ”[0-i] “ [You]126-jameson told [me]0-i not to force this between [us]4651-us . ”[0-i] [I]0-i listen . “ [I]0-i ’m stepping back . ”[0-i] [My]0-i heart drops . “ [You]126-jameson ’re giving up ? ”[0-i] “ No . Just the opposite ; [I]0-i ’m making plans for [our]4651-us future . But [I]0-i understand that [you]0-i need time . [Me]0-i forcing [you]0-i to forgive [me]0-i before [you]0-i ’re ready may not be the smartest move . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile softly as [I]0-i listen , hope blooming in [my]0-i chest . “ [You]0-i just call [me]2715-me whenever [you]0-i want to speak to [me]2715-me , ”[2715-me] [he]2715-me says . “ Okay . ”[2715-me] “ And that could be fifty times a day . [I]0-i ’ll be waiting for [your]0-i call like [a lovesick schoolboy]4652-a lovesick schoolboy . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i hang on the line . . . [I]0-i really do want to see [him]2715-me this weekend . No . “ Okay . ”[0-i] “ Goodbye , [Emily]91-emily . ”[0-i] “ Goodbye , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [I]0-i hang up , smell [my]0-i rose , and smile sadly out the window as [New York]3-new york flies by . [I]0-i feel like [I]0-i ’m in a subspace . Caught between [two men]2607-two men , each with [their]2607-two men own memory — one of [Jameson Miles]126-jameson ’s coldhearted dismissal and the other of [playful Jim]90-jim ’s overwhelming love . Each time [I]0-i feel [myself]0-i leaning toward one , the other jumps in [my]0-i way . [I]0-i ’m not sure how to turn this off , but [I]0-i need to work it out . . . and sooner rather than later . Half an hour later [the limo]811-the limo pulls up at [the airport]276-the airport , and [Alan]152-alan opens [my]0-i door . [I]0-i clutch [my]0-i rose in [my]0-i hand , knowing that [I]0-i ca n’t take it in . [Alan]152-alan retrieves [my]0-i bag from the trunk . “ Would [you]0-i like [me]152-alan to carry this in for [you]0-i ? ”[152-alan] [he]152-alan asks . “ No , thank [you]152-alan . ”[152-alan] [I]0-i look down at [my]0-i rose . [I]0-i feel strangely attached to it and ca n’t stand the thought of it dying . “ Would [you]152-alan be able to put the rose in some water for [me]0-i , please ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask [him]152-alan . [He]152-alan smiles warmly . “ Of course . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan takes it from [me]0-i . “ [I]152-alan ’ll put it in water at [[Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles ’s apartment]4653-mr. miles ’s apartment for [you]0-i . ”[152-alan] “ Thank [you]152-alan . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug , suddenly feeling stupid . “ Goodbye , [Alan]152-alan . ”[0-i] “ [I]152-alan ’ll see [you]152-alan on Sunday when [we]4654-we pick [you]152-alan up . ”[152-alan] “ Okay . ”[0-i] With a meek wave , [I]0-i make [my]0-i way to the check - in desk , and surprisingly there ’s no line today . “ Hello . [I]0-i have a booking for [Emily Foster]91-emily . ”[0-i] [I]0-i slide [my]0-i license across the desk to [the check - in clerk]2719-the check - in clerk . “ Hello . ”[2719-the check - in clerk] [She]2719-the check - in clerk types [my]0-i name into [her]2719-the check - in clerk computer . “ Ah yes , [Ms. Foster]146-ms. foster . [I]2719-the check - in clerk see [you]152-alan have amended [your]152-alan booking to first class . ”[2719-the check - in clerk] [I]0-i frown . “ No . ”[2719-the check - in clerk] [She]2719-the check - in clerk rechecks the details . “ Yes , [your]152-alan two tickets were upgraded late last night . ”[2719-the check - in clerk] “ Two tickets ? ”[2719-the check - in clerk] “ Yes , a second was booked , and then they were both upgraded . ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson . “ Oh , [I]126-jameson see . Okay , thank [you]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i collect [my]0-i ticket and walk through security and make [my]0-i way to [the bar]534-the bar . [I]0-i have nearly two hours before [my]0-i flight leaves . “ What will it be ? ”[2721-the bartender] [the bartender]2721-the bartender asks as [I]0-i take a seat . “ A margarita , please . ”[2721-the bartender] [I]0-i text [Jameson]126-jameson . [Mr Miles]114-mr. miles , thank [you]114-mr. miles for the upgrade . It is very much appreciated . Tell [me]0-i , was the second seat for [you]114-mr. miles or to make sure [I]0-i did n’t sit next to [someone else]1023-someone else ? [My]0-i drink is delivered , and a text bounces back . [[My]0-i dear]2723-my dear [Miss Foster]146-ms. foster , [I]0-i am outraged that [you]146-ms. foster would think [I]0-i could be so calculating . Of course , [I]0-i do n’t want [you]146-ms. foster sitting next to [anyone else]632-anyone else . [I]0-i know how irresistible [you]146-ms. foster are . xoxox [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i sip [my]0-i drink , and another text arrives . Although , if [I]0-i was n’t playing hard to get and being non - pushy . [I]0-i would have taken [you]146-ms. foster on [the company jet]2725-the company jet and initiated [you]146-ms. foster to the real [Miles High Club]9-miles - high club . [You]146-ms. foster would n’t walk for a week . Enjoy the peaceful silence . xoxox [I]0-i roll [my]0-i lips to hide [my]0-i smile , and [I]0-i text back . Goodbye [Jameson]126-jameson . Glad that [your]126-jameson deviant behavior is still alive and well . [I]0-i was getting worried . xoxoxo A text comes straight in . [You]146-ms. foster have no idea . And no watching [Magic Mike]96-michael , watch [Grumpy Old Men]2726-grumpy old men instead . It will make [me]0-i more appealing . xoxox [I]0-i sip [my]0-i drink and find [myself]0-i smiling goofily into space . Things are going well . . . for the first time in a long time , [I]0-i feel [myself]0-i become a little excited for what ’s to come . Let ’s see what happens . [I]0-i stare at the ceiling in the darkness from [my]0-i bed . It ’s midnight . [[My]0-i old bedroom]2727-my old bedroom brings a surprising comfort that [I]0-i did n’t know [I]0-i needed . It ’s great being here with [[my]0-i family]3517-my family , but [New York]3-new york seems so very far away . [I]0-i did n’t call [Jameson]126-jameson like [I]0-i said [I]0-i would ; in fact [I]0-i have n’t spoken to [him]126-jameson all night . Being here with [people who love [me]0-i]2729-people who love me makes [me]0-i realize how fragile [I]0-i ’ve been . [I]0-i was completely alone and heartbroken in [New York]3-new york . [I]0-i mean sure , [I]0-i had [Molly]111-molly and [Aaron]110-aaron , but [I]0-i ’ve known [them]2730-them all of three months . It ’s not the same as having [family around]2731-family around , [the ones who will stand by [your]2733-your side]2732-the ones who will stand by your side through thick and thin . [I]0-i do n’t know where [I]0-i ’m going with [Jameson]126-jameson , only that [I]0-i did n’t want to speak to [him]126-jameson tonight . Why ? Maybe [I]0-i ’m never going to let go of this hurt ; maybe [he]126-jameson ’s done irreversible damage . Maybe [I]0-i ’m too good for [him]126-jameson and [his]126-jameson shit . . . there ’s no maybe in that sentence — [I]0-i know [I]0-i am . [My]0-i phone vibrates on the side table , and [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i see the letter J light up . [I]0-i exhale heavily and answer , “ Hello . ”[0-i] “ Hi . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson pauses for a moment . “ [You]126-jameson were n’t calling [me]126-jameson tonight ? ”[126-jameson] “ [I]0-i got distracted . ”[0-i] Silence down the phone . Eventually [he]126-jameson speaks . “ [Em]91-emily . ”[126-jameson] “ Yes . ”[126-jameson] “ Did [you]126-jameson go [there]3073-there to get away from [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes in frustration . “ No , [Jameson]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper angrily . “ Why is everything about [you]126-jameson ? [I]0-i booked this trip two weeks ago . ”[0-i] “ Okay , [I]126-jameson just asked . [Jesus]150-jesus . Why are [you]126-jameson so angry ? ”[126-jameson] Tears form in [my]0-i eyes . “ [You]126-jameson really have to ask ? ”[126-jameson] “ [You]126-jameson tell [me]0-i why . ”[0-i] Suddenly a volcano that [I]0-i did n’t even know was there erupts inside of [me]0-i . “ Because [I]0-i ’m in love with [a selfish fucking asshole]4656-a selfish fucking asshole , and [I]0-i do n’t know how to turn it off , and [I]0-i ’m waiting for the other shoe to drop and for [you]2734-you walk away again , ”[0-i] [I]0-i blurt out in a rush . [He]2734-you stays silent . “ And the way [you]2734-you just march back in and demand [my]2734-you forgiveness pisses [me]2734-you off . ”[2734-you] [He]2734-you listens . “ And [you]2734-you could have [any woman in [the world]268-the world]4657-any woman in the world ; [they]4657-any woman in the world are lining up for [you]2734-you . So why are [you]2734-you putting [me]2734-you through this shit ? [I]2734-you do n’t want the heartache , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[2734-you] “ Is that what [you]2734-you think ? That [I]0-i want [any woman]4659-any woman in [the world]268-the world ? ”[0-i] Tears roll down [my]0-i face , and [I]0-i swipe them away angrily . “ [I]0-i have no idea what [you]2734-you want anymore , [Jameson]126-jameson . ”[0-i] “ Cut the fucking shit , [Emily]91-emily , ”[2734-you] [he]2734-you snaps . “ [You]91-emily listen , and [you]91-emily listen good . [I]2734-you do n’t want [anyone else]632-anyone else . [I]2734-you ’ve been promiscuous since [I]2734-you was eighteen years old . [I]2734-you ’ve slept with [a lot of [women]300-women]3957-a lot of women . . . and [I]2734-you mean [a lot of [women]300-women]3957-a lot of women . [You]91-emily are [the only person [I]2734-you have ever had this connection with]4666-the only person i have ever had this connection with . [The only woman [I]2734-you have loved like this]4667-the only woman i have loved like this . So do n’t [you]2734-you dare throw that shit at [me]2734-you about wanting [someone else]1023-someone else . Have [I]2734-you ever given [you]2734-you any reason to doubt [me]2734-you ? ”[2734-you] “ [[Your]2735-me masseuse]3581-your masseuse , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ Was before [I]2735-me fucking met [you]0-i , ”[2735-me] [he]2735-me growls . [I]0-i can hear the anger in [his]2735-me voice . “ If [you]0-i do n’t want [me]2735-me , then fine , [I]2735-me ’ll leave . But do n’t let [me]2735-me hold out and try desperately to make things work when [you]2734-you ’re obviously not going to let [me]2735-me in . ”[2735-me] [My]0-i face contorts with tears . “ Only [you]0-i can decide if [you]0-i want this , [Emily]91-emily . [Forgiveness]219-forgiveness is a choice . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stay silent . “ Do [you]2735-me want to walk away from [me]0-i , or do [you]2735-me want to try and make this work ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i do n’t answer [him]2735-me . “ Well ? ”[2735-me] [he]2735-me demands . “ [You]2735-me know [I]0-i want to try , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Then stop thinking of the bad shit , and think of the good between [us]4670-us . ”[0-i] “ [I]2735-me ca n’t . ”[2735-me] “ Why not ? ”[2735-me] “ Because [you]2735-me scare [me]0-i . ”[0-i] [He]2735-me falls silent . “ [You]2735-me ’re scared of [me]2735-me ? ”[2735-me] “ Yes . ”[0-i] [I]0-i nod through tears . “ [Baby]3139-baby , ”[2735-me] [he]2735-me whispers as empathy floods [his]2735-me voice . “ Do n’t be scared of [me]2735-me . Please , do n’t ever be scared of [me]2735-me . [I]2735-me love [you]3139-baby . ”[2735-me] “ [I]0-i ’m trying . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sob . “ But [I]0-i ca n’t help it . ”[0-i] [We]2736-i both stay silent for a while , lost in [our]2736-i own thoughts . “ [I]2736-i want [you]3139-baby to take this weekend to think about [us]2736-i . [I]2736-i was serious about what [I]2736-i said — if [you]3139-baby do n’t want to live in [New York]3-new york , [we]2736-i can move . [I]2736-i ’ll resign from [my]2736-i position immediately . ”[2736-i] “ [Jameson]126-jameson , ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh . “ Why would [you]126-jameson do that ? ”[0-i] “ Because [I]0-i want [you]3139-baby to know that [you]3139-baby come first to [me]0-i now . All of this shit — [my]0-i money , [[my]0-i apartment]940-my apartment , [my]0-i job , [New York]3-new york — it means nothing if [I]0-i ’m fucking miserable , [Emily]91-emily . And believe [me]0-i , [I]0-i am fucking miserable without [you]3139-baby . If [you]3139-baby want to live in a tent in [the back of [bumfuck nowhere]70-bumfuck nowhere]4673-the back of bumfuck nowhere , [we]4674-we can . ”[0-i] [I]0-i get a vision of [Jameson]126-jameson living in [a tent]4188-a tent and being eaten by mosquitos on the daily . “ [[You]126-jameson idiot]998-you idiot . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile softly . “ [I]0-i do n’t want to live in [a tent]4188-a tent . [I]0-i love [New York]3-new york . [I]0-i love [you]3139-baby running [Miles Media]12-miles media . [I]0-i would n’t change anything about [you]3139-baby . Why would [you]3139-baby think that [I]0-i would ? ”[0-i] “ Because [I]0-i ’m a lot to take on , [I]0-i know that . [You]3139-baby said to [me]0-i once before that to love is to be brave . [I]0-i need [you]3139-baby to be brave , [Emily]91-emily , and move forward from all this . Please think about it . Come back to [New York]3-new york and back to [me]0-i one hundred percent , and [we]4677-we can start working on a new life together . Holding [me]0-i at arm ’s distance is n’t the way to navigate this . [We]4677-we wo n’t be able to work it out if [we]4677-we ’re not together . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i know , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Will [you]3139-baby think about what [you]3139-baby really want ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i stay silent . “ Please , [Em]91-emily ? ”[0-i] “ Yes , okay . [I]0-i will . [I]0-i promise . ”[0-i] The line falls silent for a moment , and [I]0-i want to change the subject . “ What are [you]2738-i doing tomorrow ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Shopping . ”[0-i] “ Shopping — [you]0-i ? What are [you]0-i shopping for ? ”[0-i] “ Well , where do [you]2738-i get [the tents with bathrooms in [them]4678-the tents with bathrooms in them]4678-the tents with bathrooms in them ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ [Bumfuck nowhere]70-bumfuck nowhere . ”[0-i] [He]2738-i chuckles , and it ’s a beautiful sound ; it does things to [my]0-i insides . It ’s been a long time since [I]0-i heard [him]2738-i laugh . “ [Em]91-emily . . . [I]2738-i ’m not going to speak to [you]91-emily again until [I]2738-i pick [you]91-emily up from [the airport]276-the airport on Sunday night . [I]2738-i want [you]91-emily to really think about [your]91-emily future and who [you]91-emily want in it . Either [you]91-emily come back to [me]2738-i with open arms , and [we]4680-we give this a red - hot go , or [you]91-emily end it . ”[2738-i] [My]0-i heart drops . “ It has to be this way . If [I]2738-i ca n’t have all of [you]91-emily , [I]2738-i would rather be without [you]91-emily . ”[2738-i] [I]0-i listen as [my]0-i mind begins to go into overdrive . . . [he]2739-he ’s giving [me]0-i an ultimatum . All or nothing . [I]0-i honestly do n’t know if [I]0-i can give [him]2739-he [my]0-i all . [I]0-i do n’t think [my]0-i all exists anymore . “ [I]2739-he ’ll see [you]0-i then ? ”[2739-he] [he]2739-he asks hopefully . “ Okay . ”[2739-he] “ [I]2739-he love [you]0-i . ”[2739-he] [He]2739-he hangs up , and the line goes dead . [I]0-i roll over in the darkness and exhale heavily . What do [I]0-i want for [my]0-i future ? Do [I]0-i give [him]2739-he away . . . ? Or give [him]2739-he everything ? Or what ’s left of [my]0-i heart , at least . It ’s been smashed to [smithereens]2740-smithereens . [I]0-i literally have no idea . Chapter 27 [Jameson]126-jameson [I]0-i tap [my]0-i foot as [I]0-i crane [my]0-i neck to look at the traffic backed up in front . Shit . [I]0-i press the buzzer to the front of [the limo]811-the limo . “ Are [we]4681-we going to be late ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask [Alan]152-alan . “ No , [sir]3064-sir ; [we]4681-we ’re an hour early . Plenty of time . ”[0-i] “ [I]91-emily do n’t want to miss [her]91-emily flight . Go the back way . ”[91-emily] “ [You]152-alan wo n’t . Relax . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sit back and try to control [my]0-i nerves . [Emily]91-emily has n’t contacted [me]0-i all weekend , and [I]0-i ’m pretty sure [she]91-emily ’s coming [home]3076-home to end it between [us]2743-us . [I]0-i ’ve run and run and run . The only time [I]0-i have had any semblance of peace is when [I]0-i ’ve pounded the pavement around [New York]3-new york . [I]0-i ca n’t accept the possibility that [I]0-i wo n’t be in [her]91-emily life , that [she]91-emily wo n’t be in [mine]0-i . . . the thought sickens [me]0-i . How could [I]0-i have been so fucking stupid ? [I]0-i ’ve been trying to pull a logical argument together in [my]0-i head as to what [I]0-i ’m going to say if [she]91-emily ends it . . . so far [I]0-i ’ve come up empty . [The limo]811-the limo pulls up at [the airport]276-the airport , and [I]0-i climb out in a rush . “ [You]0-i ’ll be [here]275-here ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ No , [I]0-i ’ll circle . Let [me]0-i know when [you]0-i have [her]91-emily , and [I]0-i ’ll come back around . [You]0-i still have fifty minutes before [her]91-emily plane lands . ”[0-i] “ Yes , yes , [I]0-i know . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pat down [my]0-i pockets as [I]0-i look around nervously . “ Do [I]0-i have everything ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ’m flustered and vague . “ Yes , [sir]3064-sir . ”[0-i] [I]0-i drop [my]0-i shoulders and exhale heavily . “ Wish [me]0-i luck . ”[0-i] [Alan]152-alan smiles broadly and , with a jovial nod , says , “ Good luck , [sir]3064-sir . ”[152-alan] [I]0-i walk into [the airport]276-the airport and up to the arrival gate of [[her]2747-her plane]2748-her plane . [I]0-i still have forty minutes . [I]0-i look over to the bar , and it calls [my]0-i name in a sweet song . A scotch would be so good right now . . . take the edge off . No . [I]0-i need to cut that shit out . [I]0-i have n’t allowed [myself]0-i to have a drink all weekend . [Emily]91-emily deserves more than [a drunk]2749-a drunk . With nerves racing through [my]0-i body , [I]0-i walk to one end of [the airport]276-the airport and then back to [the arrival lounge]2751-the arrival lounge . [I]0-i glance at [my]0-i watch . Thirty - five minutes to go . [I]0-i do it again and again . [I]0-i ca n’t sit still . Not when [I]0-i know what ’s coming . [Emily]91-emily [I]0-i walk with [the crowd]287-the crowd into [the arrivals lounge]2753-the arrivals lounge . [My]0-i flight has just landed , and [my]0-i heart is beating hard in [my]0-i chest . [I]0-i ’ve dug into the bottom of [my]0-i soul this weekend , searching for the answers . Trying to work out what to do with [my]0-i life and who to do it with . One thing is clear : the only thing that is clear . . . is who [I]0-i love . [I]0-i ca n’t deny it . [Jameson Miles]126-jameson is etched into [my]0-i heart , and as petrified as [I]0-i am of [him]126-jameson hurting [me]0-i again , [his]126-jameson words keep coming back to [me]0-i . “ To love is to be brave . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i ’m going to swallow [my]0-i pride and be brave . [I]0-i ’m going to let [myself]0-i go . . . and hope to [God]88-god [I]0-i ’m doing the right thing , because [I]0-i ca n’t go through this again . [He]126-jameson comes into view , and [he]126-jameson smiles as [our]2754-we eyes lock . Excitement fills [me]0-i , and [I]0-i do a little skip and begin to run , and [I]0-i jump into [his]126-jameson waiting arms . [We]2754-we cling to [each other]351-each other tightly , locked in an embrace . [We]2754-we do n’t speak ; [we]2754-we do n’t kiss ; [we]2754-we just hold on . Clinging desperately to the hope that [we]2754-we can get past this . [My]0-i shadows are chased away for a little while . “ [I]126-jameson missed [you]0-i , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers into [my]0-i hair . “ [I]126-jameson missed [you]0-i too . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson bends , and [his]126-jameson lips take [mine]0-i as [we]2754-we forget where [we]2754-we are . [His]126-jameson tongue slowly strokes through [my]0-i open lips , and [he]126-jameson holds [my]0-i face in [his]126-jameson two hands as [we]2754-we get lost in the moment . [His]126-jameson kiss is tender and , more importantly , familiar . With [him]126-jameson , [I]0-i am [home]3076-home . An hour later , [we]2754-we walk into [[my]0-i apartment]940-my apartment , hand in hand . [We]2754-we hardly spoke on the way [home]3076-home . [I]0-i sat on [his]126-jameson lap , tucked safely in [his]126-jameson big arms , and enjoyed the closeness . [His]126-jameson lips dusted back and forth over [my]0-i temple as [he]126-jameson held tight , as if not believing [I]0-i was here with [him]126-jameson . [I]0-i ’ve missed the closeness . [Our]2754-we closeness . It ’s not even about the sex with [us]2754-we anymore . [I]0-i mean , it was in the beginning . But [my]0-i heart has eclipsed any physical need that [my]0-i mere body desires . . . and [I]0-i know [he]126-jameson ’s the same . [He]126-jameson turns [me]0-i toward [him]126-jameson , and [his]126-jameson eyes search [mine]0-i . “ [Em]91-emily . . . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson pauses as if trying to get the wording right in [his]126-jameson head . “ [I]126-jameson swear to [you]0-i , from this moment on . . . [you]0-i are [[my]126-jameson everything]4686-my everything . [Our]2759-we new life together . . . starts right now . ”[126-jameson] [I]0-i smile up at [him]126-jameson as [my]0-i eyes fill with tears anew . “ [I]0-i love [you]126-jameson . ”[0-i] “ [I]2759-we love [you]0-i too . ”[2759-we] [We]2759-we kiss , and unlike the tenderness [we]2759-we have shared over the last hour , a new desperation fills [us]2759-we . Suddenly [I]0-i want [him]126-jameson . . . all of [him]126-jameson . “ Take [me]126-jameson to [bed]4687-bed . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson scoops [me]0-i up and carries [me]0-i into [the room]613-the room like [a bride]2761-a bride and stands [me]0-i before [him]126-jameson . [His]126-jameson lips drop to [my]0-i neck , and [I]0-i smile at the ceiling as goose bumps scatter over [my]0-i skin . [He]126-jameson bites [me]0-i with an edge [I]0-i remember so well . Oh , [I]0-i ’ve missed [him]126-jameson . [I]0-i lift [his]126-jameson shirt over [his]126-jameson head and throw it to the side , and [he]126-jameson does the same to [mine]0-i . [We]2762-we become animals as [we]2762-we tear [each other]351-each other ’s clothes away . There is nothing between [us]2762-we now . Only skin . . . and love . [His]126-jameson lips tenderly take [mine]0-i as [he]126-jameson lays [me]0-i back on the bed , and [his]126-jameson lips go to [my]0-i neck and then start to go lower , and [I]0-i cling to [him]126-jameson . “ No , [I]126-jameson need [you]126-jameson up here with [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] [We]2762-we stare at [each other]351-each other in some kind of otherworldly experience . This is special . [I]0-i wish [I]0-i could bottle this moment . “ Now , [Jim]90-jim , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper , “ [I]0-i need [you]126-jameson now . ”[0-i] [His]126-jameson eyes close in pleasure as [he]126-jameson lies on top of [me]0-i ; [our]2762-we lips are locked , [my]0-i legs open and cradling [his]126-jameson large body as it rocks against [mine]0-i , searching for its own release . With one deep purposeful thrust , [he]126-jameson slides home deep , and [we]2762-we both moan in pleasure . “ Fuck , [Em]91-emily , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers into [my]0-i neck . [I]0-i cling to [him]126-jameson as [I]0-i ride the pleasure wave between [us]2762-we . “ [I]126-jameson know , [baby]3139-baby , [I]126-jameson know . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson pulls out and pushes back in , [my]0-i body rising to meet [his]126-jameson . The need for more overwhelms [us]2762-we , and [I]0-i begin to thrash beneath [him]126-jameson . “ Fuck [me]0-i , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whimper . “ [God]88-god , give it to [me]126-jameson hard . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson pulls out and slams back in , knocking the air from [my]0-i lungs . [He]126-jameson repositions [my]0-i legs over [his]126-jameson shoulders and , with dark eyes watching [me]0-i struggle to take [him]126-jameson , begins to ride [me]0-i . Long , sharp , punishing hits — the bed begins to hit the wall , and [I]0-i can do nothing but watch [the perfect male specimen in all [his]126-jameson glory]2765-the perfect male specimen in all his glory . [Jameson Miles]126-jameson is [the most sexual being [I]0-i have ever known]2766-the most sexual being i have ever known . Everything about [him]126-jameson screams “ fuck [me]126-jameson . ”[126-jameson] Watching [him]126-jameson in the throes of passion , where [he]126-jameson is grappling for control , is [every woman]2767-every woman ’s ultimate fantasy ; [he]126-jameson ’s like a sexual time bomb waiting to explode . Perspiration dusts [his]126-jameson skin ; [his]126-jameson dark hair hangs over [his]126-jameson forehead , and [his]126-jameson breath begins to quiver as [he]126-jameson struggles to hold off [his]126-jameson orgasm . [His]126-jameson pumps become piston fast , and the burn of [his]126-jameson possession overtakes [me]0-i as [I]0-i fall into the abyss . [I]0-i cry out as an earth - shattering orgasm rips [me]0-i to shreds . [My]0-i body contracts hard around [his]126-jameson . “ Fuck , fuck , fuck , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson pushes out as [he]126-jameson slams repeatedly into [me]0-i . The sound of the bed hitting the wall with force echoes through [the apartment]3531-the apartment . [He]126-jameson tips [his]126-jameson head back , holds [himself]126-jameson deep , and moans loud as [he]126-jameson comes hard , deep inside of [me]0-i . And then [we]2769-we kiss , and [my]0-i whole world returns to good . To [the place [I]0-i ’ve missed so , so much]2770-the place i ’ve missed so , so much . The emotion between [us]2769-we is so strong that it brings tears to [my]0-i eyes . “ Welcome [home]3076-home , fuck bunny , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson whispers against [my]0-i lips . “ Welcome [home]3076-home . ”[126-jameson] One week later “ [We]2769-we need to do a follow - up story , a where - are - [they]267-people - now kind of thing , ”[197-athena] [Athena]197-athena says as [we]2769-we stand together at the printer . “ Yes , [I]197-athena know . [I]197-athena ’m going to go over the notes this afternoon as soon as [I]197-athena get a chance . ”[197-athena] [The office]444-the office is a hive of activity today ; news has broken overnight . [A married senator]2772-a married senator has been caught in a scandal with [[his]2772-a married senator secretary]2773-his secretary , and the phones are ringing off the hook . [People]267-people are everywhere as [they]267-people try to decipher the truth as the rumor mill spins into overdrive . [I]0-i ’m having trouble concentrating , if [I]0-i ’m honest . [I]0-i ’m on a [Jameson high]119-jameson miles . [I]0-i think [I]0-i can successfully say [I]0-i ’ve joined [the Miles - High club]3145-the miles - high club . This last week has been . . . magical . [I]0-i ’m completely and utterly in love with [this man]327-this man . [We]2769-we moved [me]0-i into [[his]327-this man apartment]3362-his apartment on the weekend . Any trepidation that [I]0-i had has finally gone . [I]0-i hear an unusual sound coming through [the office]444-the office , and [Athena]197-athena and [I]0-i look up as [the office]444-the office watches on . [I]0-i hear “ The Piña Colada Song , ”[0-i] and [I]0-i frown as [Jameson]126-jameson comes into view through the desks . [Tristan]135-tristan is with [him]327-this man and holding an old - fashioned tape deck , and the familiar tune is blasting through [the office]444-the office . If [you]2781-you like piña coladas , And getting caught in the rain . “ What in [the world]268-the world ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown . [Jameson]126-jameson smiles hopefully as [he]126-jameson approaches [me]0-i . [His]126-jameson eyes search [mine]0-i . [The office]444-the office falls silent as [they]2783-they watch on . “ [Emily Foster]91-emily , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says . “ Yes ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson drops to [his]126-jameson knee , and [the office]444-the office collectively gasps . [My]0-i hands fly over [my]0-i mouth . “ Will [you]0-i marry [me]126-jameson ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson opens a black box and holds out a solitaire diamond ring . [I]0-i stare at [him]126-jameson for a moment as [my]0-i brain misfires . Is this real ? [I]0-i look over to [Tristan]135-tristan . [I]0-i ’m in complete and utter shock . “ [I]135-tristan ’m [the DJ]4692-the dj . ”[135-tristan] [Tristan]135-tristan grins as [he]135-tristan taps the tape recorder as if very proud of [himself]135-tristan . “ [You]135-tristan are crazy , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ This proves it , ”[126-jameson] [Jameson]126-jameson mutters dryly as [he]126-jameson looks up at [me]0-i from [his]126-jameson knee . [My]0-i eyes are wide . [I]0-i ’m shocked to [my]0-i very core . “ Answer the question , ”[126-jameson] [he]126-jameson says . [I]0-i nod through giggles as “ The Pina Colada Song ”[0-i] echoes through [the office]444-the office . “ Yes . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson slides the ring on [my]0-i finger . It ’s an oval diamond on a thin gold band , and [I]0-i stare at it , still completely in shock . [I]0-i bend to [him]126-jameson , and [we]2786-we kiss as [the office]444-the office breaks into laughter and cheers . [They]2788-they clap as [we]2786-we laugh into [our]2786-we kiss . [I]0-i ca n’t believe this is happening . [He]126-jameson stands and takes [me]0-i into [his]126-jameson arms . “ Cheesy enough for [you]0-i ? ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson smiles down at [me]0-i . [I]0-i giggle as [I]0-i hold [him]126-jameson tight . “ Next level cheese — and perfect . [I]0-i love [you]126-jameson , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles . ”[0-i] The song finishes , and [Tristan]135-tristan presses play , and the song begins to repeat . [The workers]3561-the workers all cheer . [Jameson]126-jameson laughs in embarrassment and leans in to kiss [me]0-i . “ The things [I]126-jameson would do for [you]0-i , [Emily Foster]91-emily , the things [I]126-jameson would do . ”[126-jameson] Epilogue One month later [I]0-i read the story in the paper . [Hayden Morris]113-hayden and [Lara Aspin]145-lara aspin were officially charged today with the embezzlement of seven million dollars from [Miles Media]12-miles media . In what has been described as a modern [Bonnie and Clyde]220-bonnie and clyde story , [the two , who have been dating for five years]2790-the two , who have been dating for five years , carried out the fraud over a period of three years . The crime may have gone unnoticed , and [they]2790-the two , who have been dating for five years were only caught when [Morris]113-hayden was fired by [Miles Media]12-miles media . Fueled by a need for revenge , [they]2790-the two , who have been dating for five years stupidly decided to frame [Jameson Miles]126-jameson for the crime . In the backfire of all backfires , this decision sealed [their]2790-the two , who have been dating for five years fate . [The pair]2791-the pair will be serving prison time of ten years in [different state prisons]2792-different state prisons . [Jameson Miles]126-jameson has been cleared of any wrongdoing . [Miles Media]12-miles media reached a new height today on the stock market since April 2018 . [I]0-i smile broadly . It seems so long ago now that this all happened — a lifetime , if [I]0-i ’m honest . Thank heavens it ’s all over . [We]2793-we have a wedding to plan . [He]126-jameson ’s given [me]0-i three months . [We]2793-we have so much to do , so many decisions . Where will [we]2793-we get married ? [I]0-i have no idea . [Jameson]126-jameson has said that [I]0-i have to pick the destination because as long as [I]0-i ’m there , [he]126-jameson does n’t care where it is . [I]0-i wait on the curb in [the underground parking lot]2794-the underground parking lot . It ’s Friday afternoon . “ What did [he]126-jameson say [he]126-jameson was doing ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown at [Alan]152-alan . “ [I]152-alan think [you]0-i will be pleasantly surprised . ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan smirks . [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i consider the possibilities . [Jameson]126-jameson has been acting weird all week . Taking secret phone calls and being all pleased with [himself]126-jameson . Maybe [he]126-jameson ’s secretly booked [the wedding venue]2795-the wedding venue ? [I]0-i hope so — helps [me]0-i out . [I]0-i hear a crunch of gears , and [I]0-i look up and frown . [Bessie]202-bessie is bunny hopping toward [us]2796-us with [Jameson]126-jameson behind the wheel , and [Alan]152-alan bursts out laughing . [My]0-i mouth falls open in shock . “ What in [the world]268-the world ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [He]152-alan pulls up beside [me]0-i , and [I]0-i open the door . “ Going [my]152-alan way ? ”[152-alan] [He]152-alan smiles with a sexy wink . [I]0-i laugh out loud . “ What are [you]152-alan doing ? ”[0-i] “ Taking [you]152-alan away for a few days . ”[152-alan] “ [You]152-alan are ? ”[0-i] “ [Your]152-alan things are already in the trunk . ”[0-i] “ In [Bessie]202-bessie ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i stammer . “ Yes , in [Bitchy]221-bitchy . [I]0-i borrowed [her]202-bessie from [Viagra Mike]222-viagra mike . Although [I]0-i must tell [you]152-alan , [I]0-i ’ve ordered [you]152-alan a new Range Rover . [Bessie]202-bessie is unbearable . ”[0-i] “ [[You]152-alan snob]4694-you snob . ”[0-i] [I]0-i giggle , then turn and hug [Alan]152-alan in excitement . [He]152-alan laughs . “ Have a great weekend , [Ms. Foster]146-ms. foster , ”[152-alan] [he]152-alan says as [he]152-alan helps [me]0-i into [the car]422-the car . [I]0-i lean over and grab [Jameson]126-jameson and kiss [his]126-jameson face . [I]0-i love that [he]152-alan borrowed [Bessie]202-bessie for [me]0-i . [He]152-alan honks the horn . “ Goodbye , [Alan]152-alan , ”[152-alan] [he]152-alan calls as [he]152-alan does an overexaggerated wave . [I]0-i laugh out loud at [his]152-alan un - [Jameson]126-jameson - like behavior . “ Goodbye , [Alan]152-alan . ”[0-i] [We]2798-we bunny hop out of [the parking lot]1698-the parking lot , and [he]152-alan takes [my]0-i hand in [his]152-alan and kisses the back of it . “ Where do [you]152-alan want to go , [[my]152-alan little fuck bunny]4695-my little fuck bunny ? ”[152-alan] [I]0-i smile over at [[my]0-i beautiful man]1888-my beautiful man . “ Bumfuck nowhere . ”[0-i] Two hours later [Jameson]126-jameson pulls into [the driveway of [Arndell]50-arndell]2801-the driveway of arndell , and [I]0-i bounce in [my]0-i seat . “ [We]2802-we are going to [[our]2802-we house]4696-our house ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i shriek in excitement . “ Yes , [I]0-i booked it for the weekend . ”[0-i] [I]0-i unclip [my]0-i seat belt and slide over and begin to smother [his]126-jameson face in kisses as [we]2802-we drive up [the driveway]1971-the driveway while [he]126-jameson chuckles at [my]0-i childlike behavior . [We]2802-we arrive at [the old house]2804-the old house , and [I]0-i bounce out of [the car]422-the car before [the car]422-the car even stops and run up to the front door . [I]0-i turn and stare out over the view of [the beautiful grounds]2807-the beautiful grounds . “ Oh , [Jameson]126-jameson , [I]0-i just love [this place]459-this place . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile dreamily as [he]126-jameson walks up behind [me]0-i . “ [I]126-jameson know . ”[126-jameson] [He]126-jameson hands [me]0-i a key ring with a red ribbon bow tied to it . [I]0-i frown as [I]0-i stare down at it in [my]0-i hand . “ That ’s why [I]0-i bought it for [you]126-jameson . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes meet [his]126-jameson . “ What ? ”[0-i] “ Uh - huh . [I]126-jameson thought [we]4698-we could live [here]275-here on the weekends and on holidays . ”[126-jameson] “ [You]126-jameson want to be a swamp person with [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper in surprise . [He]126-jameson stands and takes [me]0-i in [his]126-jameson arms . “ [I]126-jameson could be anything , [Emily Foster]91-emily . . . as long as [I]126-jameson ’m with [you]0-i . ”[126-jameson] Desperate to know more about [the Miles brothers]3570-the miles brothers ? Read on for an exclusive first chapter of the next book in the series , The Takeover , out very soon . . . Chapter 1 The phone buzzes on [my]0-i desk . “ Hello , ”[0-i] [I]0-i answer . “ Hi , [Tristan Miles]135-tristan is on line two for [you]0-i , ”[223-marley] [Marley]223-marley replies . “ Tell [him]135-tristan [I]223-marley ’m busy . ”[223-marley] “ [Claire]224-claire . ”[223-marley] [She]223-marley pauses . “ This is the third time [he]135-tristan ’s called this week . ”[223-marley] “ So ? ”[223-marley] “ Pretty soon , [he]135-tristan ’s going to stop calling . ”[223-marley] “ And [your]223-marley point is ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap in exasperation . [I]0-i love [Marley]223-marley , but damn it , [I]0-i wish [she]223-marley would mind [her]223-marley business . Sometimes , it really blows having [[your]2809-your best friend]2810-your best friend as [[your]2809-your receptionist]2811-your receptionist . “ [My]0-i point is [we]4700-we paid [the staff]274-the staff out of the overdraft this week . And [I]0-i know [you]0-i do n’t want to admit this , but [we]2812-we are in trouble , [Claire]224-claire . [You]0-i need to hear [him]4702-him out . ”[0-i] [I]0-i exhale heavily and drag [my]0-i hand down [my]0-i face . [I]0-i know [she]223-marley ’s right : [[our]2812-we company]2813-our company , [Anderson Media]74-anderson media , is struggling . [We]2812-we ’re down to [[our]2812-we last three hundred staff members]2814-our last three hundred staff members , having downscaled from the original six hundred . [Miles Media]103-miles media has been circling like wolves for months , watching and waiting for the perfect time to move in for the kill . [Tristan Miles]135-tristan : [the head of acquisitions]2815-the head of acquisitions and [the archenemy of [every struggling company in [the world]268-the world]2817-every struggling company in the world]2816-the archenemy of every struggling company in the world . Like [a leech]2819-a leech , [he]135-tristan takes over [companies]1895-companies when [they]1895-companies ’re at [their]1895-companies lowest , tears [them]1895-companies apart , and then with [his]135-tristan never - ending funds , turns [them]1895-companies into huge successes . [He]135-tristan ’s the lowest snake in [the snake pit]2821-the snake pit . Preying on weaknesses and getting paid millions of dollars a year for the privilege . [He]135-tristan ’s [a rich , spoiled bastard with a reputation of being acutely intelligent , hard as nails , and conscience - free]2822-a rich , spoiled bastard with a reputation of being acutely intelligent , hard as nails , and conscience - free . [He]135-tristan ’s everything [I]0-i hate about business . “ Just listen to what [he]135-tristan has to say — that ’s all . [You]0-i never know what [he]135-tristan might offer , ”[223-marley] [Marley]223-marley pleads . “ Oh , come on , ”[0-i] [I]0-i scoff . “ [We]4703-we both know what [he]135-tristan wants . ”[0-i] “ [Claire]224-claire , please . ”[223-marley] [She]223-marley pauses . “ [You]224-claire ca n’t lose [[your]224-claire family]4704-your family home . [I]223-marley wo n’t let that happen . ”[223-marley] Sadness rolls over [me]0-i ; what a mess [I]0-i ’ve made of everything . “ Fine . ”[0-i] [I]0-i sigh , defeated . “ Schedule a meeting . ”[0-i] “ Okay , great . ”[223-marley] “ Do n’t get excited , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . “ [I]0-i ’m just doing this to shut [you]223-marley up , [you]223-marley know ? ”[0-i] “ Good , mouth officially shut from here on out . Cross [my]0-i heart . ”[0-i] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . “ If only . Will [you]223-marley come with [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] “ Yes , for sure . [We]4705-we ’ll stick [Mr. Fancy Pants]225-mr. fancy pants ’s checkbook where the sun does n’t shine . ”[0-i] [I]0-i giggle at the idea . “ Okay , deal . ”[0-i] [I]0-i hang up and go back to [my]0-i report , wishing it were Friday and [I]0-i did n’t have to worry about [Anderson Media]74-anderson media and the bills . [I]0-i ’m tired . . . so tired . Thursday morning [Marley]223-marley and [I]0-i power down [the street]654-the street on the way to [our]2824-we meeting . “ Why are [we]2824-we meeting here again ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [He]4706-he wanted to meet somewhere neutral . [He]4706-he has a table booked at [Bryant Park Grill]75-bryant park grill . ”[0-i] “ That ’s odd — it ’s not a date , ”[0-i] [I]0-i scoff . “ It ’s probably all part of [his]4706-he grand plan . ”[0-i] [She]223-marley holds [her]223-marley hands up and does an air rainbow . “ Neutral ground . ”[223-marley] [She]223-marley widens [her]223-marley eyes in jest . “ While [he]4706-he tries to fuck [us]2824-we up the ass . ”[223-marley] “ With a smile on [his]4706-he face . ”[0-i] [I]0-i huff . “ Oh god , [I]0-i hate [him]4706-he already . ”[0-i] “ So remember the strategy . ”[223-marley] [She]223-marley coaches [me]0-i as [we]2824-we walk . “ Yes . ”[223-marley] “ Tell [me]0-i it again . . . so [I]0-i remember it . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . [Marley]223-marley is [an idiot]2654-an idiot . [A funny idiot]2826-a funny idiot nonetheless . “ Stay calm ; do n’t let [him]4706-he ruffle [my]2826-a funny idiot feathers . Do n’t say an outright no — just keep [him]4706-he on ice in the background as an insurance policy . ”[2826-a funny idiot] “ Yes , that ’s a great plan . ”[2654-an idiot] “ It should be . . . [you]2828-she thought of it . ”[2826-a funny idiot] [We]2824-we arrive at [the restaurant]3510-the restaurant . [I]0-i take out [my]0-i compact and reapply [my]0-i lipstick . [My]0-i dark hair is twisted up into a loose knot . [I]0-i ’m wearing a navy pantsuit with a cream silk blouse , closed - toe high - heeled patent pumps , and [my]0-i pearl earrings . Sensible clothes — [I]0-i want [him]2828-she to take [me]0-i seriously . “ Do [I]0-i look okay ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ [You]2828-she look hot . ”[0-i] [My]0-i face falls . “ [I]0-i do n’t want to look hot , [Marley]223-marley . [I]0-i want to look hard . ”[0-i] [She]2828-she scowls as [she]2828-she falls into character . “ Totally hard . ”[2828-she] [She]2828-she punches [her]2828-she hand with [her]2828-she fist . “ [Iron maiden]4707-iron maiden snatch style . ”[2828-she] [I]0-i smirk at [[my]0-i gorgeous friend]2829-my gorgeous friend ; [her]2828-she bright - red zany hair is short and punky , and [her]2828-she pink cat - eye glasses are in full swing . [She]2828-she ’s wearing a red dress with a bright - yellow shirt underneath with red stockings and shoes . [She]2828-she ’s so trendy that [she]2828-she ’s actually scruffy . [Marley]223-marley is [[my]0-i best friend]2830-my best friend , [[my]0-i confidante]2831-my confidante , and [the hardest worker in [our]2833-our company]2832-the hardest worker in our company . [She]223-marley has n’t left [my]0-i side for the last five years ; [her]223-marley friendship is a gift , and [I]0-i have no idea where [I]0-i would be without [her]223-marley . “ Are [you]0-i ready ? ”[223-marley] [she]223-marley asks . “ Yes . [We]2833-our are twenty minutes early — [I]223-marley wanted to get [here]275-here first . Get the upper hand . ”[223-marley] [Her]223-marley shoulders slump . “ When [I]223-marley ask [you]0-i if [you]0-i ’re ready , [you]0-i ’re supposed to answer with , ‘ [I]223-marley was born ready . ’ ”[223-marley] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes . “ This is n’t a fucking Rocky Balboa movie , [Marley]223-marley , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap as [I]0-i push past [her]223-marley . “ Let ’s get this over with . ”[0-i] [We]2834-we drop [our]2834-we shoulders , steel [ourselves]2834-we , and walk into [the foyer]799-the foyer . [The waiter]867-the waiter smiles . “ Hello , [ladies]3496-ladies . How can [I]867-the waiter help [you]3496-ladies ? ”[867-the waiter] “ Ah . ”[0-i] [I]0-i glance at [Marley]223-marley . “ [We]2834-we are meeting [someone here]4710-someone here . ”[0-i] “ [Tristan Miles]135-tristan ? ”[867-the waiter] [he]867-the waiter asks . [I]0-i frown . How did [he]867-the waiter know that ? “ Yes . . . actually . ”[867-the waiter] “ [He]867-the waiter has [the private dining room]4711-the private dining room booked [upstairs]3211-upstairs . ”[867-the waiter] [He]867-the waiter gestures to the stairs . “ Of course [he]867-the waiter does , ”[0-i] [I]0-i mutter under [my]0-i breath . [Marley]223-marley curls [her]223-marley lip in disgust , and [we]2837-us make [our]2837-us way up the stairs . [The top floor]467-the top floor is empty . [We]2837-us look around , and [I]0-i see [a man]3093-a man out on [the balcony]2840-the balcony on [his]3093-a man phone . Perfectly fit navy suit , crisp white shirt , tall and muscular . [His]3093-a man hair is longer on top , dark brown with a curl . [He]3093-a man looks like [he]3093-a man belongs on a modeling shoot , not the snake pit at all . “ Holy fuck . . . [he]3093-a man ’s hot , ”[223-marley] [Marley]223-marley whispers . “ Shut up , ”[223-marley] [I]0-i stammer in a panic that [he]3093-a man will hear [her]223-marley . “ Act fucking cool , will [you]223-marley ? ”[223-marley] “ [I]223-marley know . ”[223-marley] [She]223-marley hits [me]0-i in the thigh , and [I]0-i hit [her]223-marley back . [He]3093-a man turns toward [us]2837-us and flashes a broad smile and holds up a finger , gesturing [he]3093-a man will be just a moment . [I]0-i fake a smile , and [he]3093-a man turns [his]3093-a man back to [us]2837-us to wrap up [his]3093-a man call . [I]0-i glare at [his]3093-a man back as [my]0-i anger rises . How dare [he]3093-a man make [us]2837-us wait . “ Do n’t speak , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Can [I]223-marley whistle ? ”[223-marley] [she]223-marley whispers as [she]223-marley looks [him]3093-a man up and down . “ [I]223-marley totally want to wolf whistle the fuck out of [this guy]289-this guy . [Asshole]3711-asshole or not . ”[223-marley] [I]0-i pinch the bridge of [my]0-i nose — this is a disaster already . “ Please , just do n’t speak , ”[0-i] [I]0-i remind [her]223-marley again . “ Okay , okay . ”[223-marley] [She]223-marley does a zip - [her]223-marley - lips - closed gesture . [He]3093-a man hangs up [his]3093-a man call and walks toward [us]2837-us , confidence personified . Smiling broadly , [he]3093-a man holds out [his]3093-a man hand . “ Hello , [I]3093-a man ’m [Tristan Miles]135-tristan . ”[3093-a man] [He]3093-a man ’s all dimples and square jaw and white teeth and . . . [I]0-i shake [his]3093-a man hand like [a truck driver]2841-a truck driver , hard and emotionless . “ Hello , [I]0-i ’m [Claire Anderson]224-claire . Nice to meet [you]3093-a man . ”[0-i] [I]0-i gesture to [Marley]223-marley . “ This is [Marley Smithson]223-marley , [[my]0-i assistant]4715-my assistant . ”[0-i] “ Hello , [Marley]223-marley . ”[3093-a man] [He]3093-a man smiles . “ Nice to meet [you]223-marley . ”[3093-a man] [He]3093-a man gestures to the table . “ Please take a seat . ”[3093-a man] [I]0-i sit down with [my]0-i heart in [my]0-i throat — great . As if [I]0-i was n’t ruffled already , [he]3093-a man did n’t have to be good looking as well . “ Coffee , tea ? ”[3093-a man] [He]3093-a man gestures to the tray . “ [I]3093-a man took the liberty of ordering [us]2842-us morning tea . ”[3093-a man] “ Coffee , please , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply . “ Just cream . ”[0-i] “ [Me]223-marley too , ”[223-marley] [Marley]223-marley adds . [He]3093-a man carefully pours [us]2842-us [our]2842-us coffees and passes them over with a side plate of cakes . [I]0-i clench [my]0-i jaw to stop [myself]0-i saying something snarky , and finally [he]3093-a man takes a seat opposite [us]2842-us . [He]3093-a man undoes [his]3093-a man suit jacket with one hand and sits back in [his]3093-a man chair . [His]3093-a man eyes come to [me]0-i . “ It ’s nice to finally meet [you]0-i , [Claire]224-claire . [I]3093-a man ’ve heard so much about [you]0-i . ”[3093-a man] [I]0-i raise [my]0-i eyebrow in annoyance ; [I]0-i hate that [his]3093-a man voice is husky and sexual . “ Likewise , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply . [I]0-i glance down and notice the black onyx - and - gold cufflinks and the fancy Rolex watch ; everything about [this guy]289-this guy screams money . [His]3093-a man aftershave wafts between [us]2842-us . [I]0-i try [my]0-i hardest not to inhale , but it ’s otherworldly . [I]0-i glance over at [Marley]223-marley , who is smiling goofily as [she]223-marley stares at [him]289-this guy . . . totally besotted . Great . [He]289-this guy sits back , relaxed and confident , cool and calculating . “ How has [your]289-this guy week been ? ”[289-this guy] “ Fine , thanks , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply , [my]0-i patience being tested . “ Let ’s just cut to the chase , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles , shall [we]2842-us ? ”[0-i] “ [Tristan]135-tristan , ”[289-this guy] [he]289-this guy corrects [me]0-i . “ [Tristan]135-tristan , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply . “ Why do [you]289-this guy want to meet with [me]0-i so badly ? What could possibly warrant [you]289-this guy calling [me]0-i five times a week for the last month ? ”[0-i] [He]289-this guy brushes [his]289-this guy pointer over [his]289-this guy big lips as if amused , and [his]289-this guy eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ [I]289-this guy ’ve been watching [Anderson Media]74-anderson media for some time now . ”[289-this guy] [I]0-i raise [my]0-i eyebrow , angered by [his]289-this guy tone . “ And do tell : what have [you]289-this guy learned ? ”[0-i] “ [You]289-this guy are letting [staff]4716-staff go every month . ”[289-this guy] “ [I]289-this guy ’m downsizing . ”[289-this guy] “ Not by choice . ”[0-i] “ [I]0-i ’m not interested in what [you]289-this guy ’re offering , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . [I]0-i feel a sharp kick under the table to [my]0-i ankle , and [I]0-i wince in pain . Oww . . . that hurt . [I]0-i glance at [Marley]223-marley . [She]223-marley widens [her]223-marley eyes in a shut - up - now signal . “ How do [you]0-i know [I]289-this guy want to make [you]0-i an offer ? ”[289-this guy] [he]289-this guy replies calmly . How many times has [he]289-this guy had this conversation ? “ Do n’t [you]289-this guy ? ”[289-this guy] “ No . ”[289-this guy] [He]289-this guy sips [his]289-this guy coffee . “ [I]289-this guy would like to buy [your]0-i company , but [I]289-this guy ’m not offering a free pass . ”[289-this guy] “ Free pass , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . [Marley]223-marley kicks [me]0-i again . . . oh shit , that hurt . [I]0-i throw [her]223-marley a dirty look , and [she]223-marley fakes a broad smile . Happy , happy , [she]223-marley mouths . “ And what do [you]289-this guy mean by a free pass , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles ? ”[223-marley] “ [Tristan]135-tristan , ”[289-this guy] [he]289-this guy corrects [me]0-i . “ [I]0-i ’ll call [you]289-this guy whatever [I]0-i want , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . [He]289-this guy gives [me]0-i a slow , sexy smile as if loving every minute of this . “ [I]289-this guy can see [you]0-i ’re [a passionate woman]4717-a passionate woman , [Claire]224-claire , and that ’s admirable . . . but come on . Let ’s be serious here . ”[289-this guy] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i lips , willing [myself]0-i to stay silent . “ The last three years [[your]0-i company]4557-your company has run at a massive loss . [You]0-i ’re losing advertising accounts left , right , and center . ”[289-this guy] [He]289-this guy steeples [his]289-this guy hand on [his]289-this guy temple as [he]289-this guy stares at [me]0-i . “ [I]289-this guy ’m guessing the financials are a nightmare . ”[289-this guy] [I]0-i swallow the lump in [my]0-i throat as [we]2844-we stare at [each other]351-each other . “ [I]0-i can take everything off [your]0-i hands , and [you]0-i can take a hard - earned break . ”[0-i] Anger begins to pump through [my]0-i blood . “ [You]0-i would love that , would n’t [you]0-i ? Play [Mr. Nice Guy]4719-mr. nice guy and take everything off [my]289-this guy hands . . . come in on [your]0-i horse and save the day like [a white knight]4720-a white knight . ”[289-this guy] [His]289-this guy eyes hold [mine]0-i , and a trace of a smile crosses [his]289-this guy face . “ [I]289-this guy will hold on to [[my]289-this guy company]4131-my company if it ’s the last thing [I]289-this guy do . ”[289-this guy] [I]0-i feel a swift kick , and [I]0-i jump , losing the last of [my]0-i patience . “ Stop kicking [me]0-i , [Marley]223-marley , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . [Tristan]135-tristan breaks into a broad smile as [he]135-tristan looks between [us]2846-us . “ Keep kicking [her]223-marley , [Marley]223-marley , ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan says . “ Kick some sense into [her]223-marley . ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i roll [my]0-i eyes , embarrassed that [[my]0-i assistant]4715-my assistant is kicking the shit out of [my]0-i ankles . [He]135-tristan sits forward , [his]135-tristan purpose renewed . “ [Claire]224-claire , let ’s get one thing straight . [I]135-tristan always get what [I]135-tristan want . And what [I]135-tristan want is [Anderson Media]74-anderson media . [I]135-tristan can take it now from [you]224-claire for a good price that will protect [you]224-claire . Or”—he[135-tristan] shrugs [casually—“I]4722-casually—“i can wait for six months until [the liquidators]4723-the liquidators move in and get if for next to nothing , and [you]224-claire can face bankruptcy . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan steeples [his]135-tristan hands on the table in front of [him]135-tristan . “ [We]4724-we both know the end is near . ”[135-tristan] “ [[You]135-tristan self - conceited prick]4725-you self - conceited prick , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [He]135-tristan tilts [his]135-tristan chin to the sky and smiles proudly . “ [Nice guys]4726-nice guys come last , [Claire]224-claire . ”[135-tristan] [My]0-i heart begins to beat faster as [my]0-i anger begins to build . “ Think about it . ”[135-tristan] [He]135-tristan takes out [his]135-tristan business card and slides it across the table . [TRISTAN MILES]135-tristan 09488449467 “ [I]135-tristan know this is not how [you]224-claire want to sell [[your]224-claire company]4557-your company . But [you]224-claire need to be [a realist]4728-a realist , ”[135-tristan] [he]135-tristan continues . [I]0-i stare at [him]135-tristan , sitting there all cold and heartless , and [I]0-i feel [my]0-i emotions bubbling dangerously close to the surface . [Our]2848-our eyes are locked . “ Take the offer , [Claire]224-claire . [I]2848-our ’ll email [you]224-claire [a figure]4729-a figure this afternoon . [You]224-claire will be taken care of . ”[2848-our] [My]0-i sanity rubber band snaps , and [I]0-i sit forward . “ And who will take care of [[my]0-i late husband]4730-my late husband ’s memory , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i sneer . “ [Miles]114-mr. miles Media sure as hell wo n’t . ”[0-i] [He]135-tristan twists [his]135-tristan lips , uncomfortable for the first time . “ Do [you]0-i know anything about [me]135-tristan and [[my]135-tristan company]4131-my company ? ”[135-tristan] “ [I]135-tristan do . ”[135-tristan] “ Then [you]0-i ’ll know that [this company]4732-this company was [[my]135-tristan husband]3944-my husband ’s labor of love . [He]3944-my husband worked for twenty years to build [it]4732-this company up from the ground . [His]3944-my husband dream was to hand down to [[his]3944-my husband three sons]4734-his three sons . ”[135-tristan] [His]135-tristan eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ So . . . do n’t [you]0-i fucking dare”—I[135-tristan] slam [my]0-i hand on the table as [my]0-i eyes fill with tears—“sit there with that smug look on [your]0-i face and threaten [me]0-i . Because believe [me]0-i . . . [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles , whatever [you]0-i ’re dishing out is n’t half as bad as losing [him]3944-my husband . ”[0-i] [I]0-i stand . “ [I]0-i ’ve already been to hell and back , and [I]0-i will not have [some rich , spoiled bastard]4735-some rich , spoiled bastard make [me]0-i feel like shit . ”[0-i] [He]135-tristan rolls [his]135-tristan lips , unimpressed . “ Do n’t call [me]135-tristan again , ”[135-tristan] [I]0-i snap as [I]0-i push back in [my]0-i chair . “ Think about it , [Claire]224-claire . ”[0-i] “ Go to hell , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap . [I]0-i begin to storm to the door . “ [She]223-marley ’s just having a bad day . [We]4736-we ’ll definitely think about it , ”[0-i] [Marley]223-marley splutters in embarrassment . “ Thanks for the cake — it was yummy . ”[223-marley] [I]0-i angrily wipe the tears from [my]0-i face as [I]0-i run down [the stairs]2393-the stairs and out the front doors . [I]0-i ca n’t believe [I]0-i was so unprofessional . Shame fills [me]0-i , and [I]0-i screw up [my]0-i face with tears anew . [Marley]223-marley runs to keep up with [me]0-i . [She]223-marley wisely stays silent and then looks up and down [the street]654-the street . “ Oh , screw this , [Claire]224-claire — let ’s not go back to work . Let ’s go get drunk instead . ”[223-marley] [Tristan]135-tristan [I]0-i stand at the window and stare over [New York]3-new york . [My]0-i hands are in [my]0-i suit pockets , and a strange feeling is burning a hole in [my]0-i stomach . [Claire Anderson]224-claire . [Beautiful , smart , and proud]2851-beautiful , smart , and proud . No matter how many times [I]0-i ’ve tried to wipe [her]224-claire out of [my]0-i mind over the last three days since [our]2852-our meeting , [I]0-i ca n’t . The way [she]224-claire looked , the way [she]224-claire smelled , the curve of [her]224-claire breast through [her]224-claire silk shirt . The fire in [her]224-claire eyes . [She]224-claire is [the most beautiful woman [I]0-i ’ve seen in a long time]2853-the most beautiful woman i ’ve seen in a long time , and [her]224-claire heartfelt words are playing on repeat . “ So . . . do n’t [you]0-i fucking dare sit there with that smug look on [your]0-i face and threaten [me]224-claire . Because believe [me]224-claire . . . [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles , whatever [you]0-i ’re dishing out is n’t half as bad as losing [him]114-mr. miles . [I]224-claire ’ve already been to hell and back , and [I]224-claire will not have [some rich , spoiled bastard]4735-some rich , spoiled bastard make [me]224-claire feel like shit . ”[224-claire] [I]0-i take a seat at [my]0-i desk and roll the pen beneath [my]0-i fingers as [I]0-i mentally go over what [I]0-i have to say . [I]0-i have to call [her]224-claire and follow up on [our]2854-our meeting , [I]0-i ’m dreading it . [I]0-i exhale heavily and dial [her]224-claire number . “ [[Claire Anderson]224-claire ’s office]4738-claire anderson ’s office . ”[0-i] “ Hello , [Marley]223-marley . It ’s [Tristan Miles]135-tristan . ”[224-claire] “ Oh , hello , [Tristan]135-tristan , ”[224-claire] [she]224-claire replies happily . “ Are [you]0-i after [Claire]224-claire ? ”[224-claire] “ Yes , [I]224-claire am . Is [she]224-claire available . ”[224-claire] “ [I]224-claire ’ll put [you]0-i straight through . ”[224-claire] “ Thank [you]223-marley . ”[0-i] [I]0-i wait , and then [she]224-claire answers . “ Hello , [Claire]224-claire speaking . ”[224-claire] [I]0-i close [my]0-i eyes at the sound of [her]224-claire voice . . . sexy , husky . . . enticing . “ Hello , [Claire]224-claire . It ’s [Tristan]135-tristan . ”[224-claire] “ Oh . ”[224-claire] [She]224-claire falls silent . Fuck . . . [Marley]223-marley did n’t tell [her]224-claire it was [me]0-i . An unfamiliar feeling begins to seep into [my]0-i bones . “ [I]0-i just wanted to see if [you]224-claire were okay after [our]4739-our meeting . [I]0-i ’m sorry if [I]0-i upset [you]224-claire . ”[0-i] [I]0-i screw up [my]0-i face . . . What are [you]224-claire doing ? This is not in the plan . “ [My]0-i feelings are no concern of yours , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles . ”[0-i] “ [Tristan]135-tristan , ”[0-i] [I]0-i correct [her]224-claire . “ How can [I]224-claire help [you]0-i ? ”[224-claire] [she]224-claire snaps impatiently . [My]0-i mind goes blank . . . “ [Tristan]135-tristan ? ”[224-claire] [she]224-claire prompts [me]0-i . “ [I]224-claire wanted to see if [you]0-i would like to have dinner with [me]224-claire on Saturday night . ”[224-claire] [My]0-i eyes close in horror . . . what the fuck am [I]0-i doing right now ? [She]224-claire stays silent for a moment and then replies in surprise . “ [You]0-i ’re asking [me]224-claire out on a date ? ”[224-claire] [I]0-i screw up [my]0-i face . “ [I]224-claire do n’t like the way [we]4740-we met . [I]224-claire would like to start again . ”[224-claire] [She]224-claire chuckles in a condescending tone . “ [You]0-i have got to be kidding . [I]224-claire would n’t go out with [you]0-i if [you]0-i were [the last man on earth]4741-the last man on earth . ”[224-claire] [She]224-claire whispers , “ Money and looks do n’t impress [me]224-claire , [Mr. Miles]114-mr. miles . ”[224-claire] [I]0-i bite [my]0-i bottom lip . . . Ouch . “ [Our]4740-we meeting was nothing personal , [Claire]224-claire . ”[0-i] “ It was very personal to [me]224-claire . Go and find [a bimbo]4742-a bimbo to wine and dine , [Tristan]135-tristan . [I]224-claire have no interest in dating [a soul - sucking cold bastard like [you]135-tristan]4743-a soul - sucking cold bastard like you . ”[224-claire] The phone clicks as [she]224-claire hangs up . [I]0-i stare at the phone in [my]0-i hand . Adrenaline is pumping through [my]0-i system at [her]224-claire fighting words . [I]0-i do n’t know whether [I]0-i ’m shocked or impressed . Perhaps a bit of both . [I]0-i ’ve never been rejected before and definitely never been spoken to like that . [I]0-i turn to [my]0-i computer and type into [Google]227-google : Who is [Claire Anderson]224-claire ? Read on for the first chapter of T L Swan†™ s backlist title , [Mr. Masters]85-mr. masters , available to buy now ! [ALINA MASTERS]228-alina masters 1984–2013 WIFE AND [BELOVED MOTHER]2855-beloved mother . IN GOD ’S HANDS [WE]2856-we TRUST . Grief . [The Grim Reaper of life]2857-the grim reaper of life . [Stealer of joy , hope , and purpose]2858-stealer of joy , hope , and purpose . Some days are bearable . Other days [I]0-i can hardly breathe , and [I]0-i suffocate in a world of regret where good reason has no sense . [I]0-i never know when those days will hit , only that when [I]0-i wake , [my]0-i chest feels constricted and [I]0-i need to run . [I]0-i need to be anywhere but here , dealing with this life . [My]0-i life . [Our]2856-we life . Until [you]2859-you left . The sound of a distant lawn mower brings [me]0-i back to the present , and [I]0-i glance over at [[the cemetery]2860-the cemetery ’s caretaker]2861-the cemetery ’s caretaker . [He]2861-the cemetery ’s caretaker ’s concentrating as [he]2861-the cemetery ’s caretaker weaves between the tombstones , careful not to clip or damage one as [he]2861-the cemetery ’s caretaker passes . It ’s dusk , and the mist is rolling in for the night . [I]0-i come [here]275-here often to think , to try and feel . [I]0-i ca n’t talk to [anyone]295-anyone . [I]0-i ca n’t express [my]0-i true feelings . [I]0-i want to know why . Why did [you]2864-you do this to [us]2856-we ? [I]0-i clench [my]0-i jaw as [I]0-i stare at [[my]0-i late wife]2865-my late wife ’s tombstone . [We]2856-we could have had it all . . . but , [we]2856-we did n’t . [I]0-i lean down and brush the dust away from [her]2865-my late wife name and rearrange the pink lilies that [I]0-i have just placed in the vase . [I]0-i touch [her]2865-my late wife face on the small oval photo . [She]2865-my late wife stares back at [me]0-i , void of emotion . Stepping back , [I]0-i drop [my]0-i hands in the pockets of [my]0-i black overcoat . [I]0-i could stand here and stare at [this headstone]2866-this headstone all day — sometimes [I]0-i do — but [I]0-i turn and walk to [the car]422-the car without looking back . [[My]0-i Porsche]2868-my porsche . Sure , [I]0-i have money and [two kids]2869-two kids that love [me]0-i . [I]0-i ’m at the top of [my]0-i professional field , working as [a judge]2870-a judge . [I]0-i have all the tools to be happy , but [I]0-i ’m not . [I]0-i ’m barely surviving ; holding on by a thread . Playing the facade to [the world]268-the world . Dying inside . Half an hour later , [I]0-i arrive at [Madison’s]77-madison’s — [[my]0-i therapist]2872-my therapist . [I]0-i always leave here relaxed . [I]0-i do n’t have to talk , [I]0-i do n’t have to think , [I]0-i do n’t have to feel . [I]0-i walk through the front doors on autopilot . “ Good afternoon , [Mr. Smith]229-mr. smith . ”[0-i] [Hayley]230-hayley , [the receptionist]742-the receptionist , smiles . “ [[Your]229-mr. smith room]4744-your room is waiting , [sir]3064-sir . ”[230-hayley] “ Thank [you]3064-sir . ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown , feeling like [I]0-i need something more today . Something to take this edginess off . A distraction . “ [I]230-hayley ’ll have [someone extra]4746-someone extra today , [Hayley]230-hayley . ”[230-hayley] “ Of course , [sir]3064-sir . Who would [you]3064-sir like ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i frown and take a moment to get it right . “ Hmm . [Hannah]231-hannah . ”[0-i] “ So , [Hannah]231-hannah and [Belinda]232-belinda ? ”[230-hayley] “ Yes . ”[230-hayley] “ No problem , [sir]3064-sir . Make [yourself]0-i comfortable and [they]4749-they will be right up . ”[0-i] [I]0-i take [the lift to [the exclusive penthouse]2875-the exclusive penthouse]2874-the lift to the exclusive penthouse . Once [there]3073-there [I]0-i make [myself]0-i a scotch and stare out the smoke - glass window overlooking [London]8-london . [I]0-i hear the door click behind [me]0-i and [I]0-i turn toward the sound . [Hannah]231-hannah and [Belinda]232-belinda stand before [me]0-i smiling . [Belinda]232-belinda has long blonde hair , while [Hannah]231-hannah is [a brunette]2877-a brunette . There ’s no denying [they]2878-they ’re both young and beautiful . “ Hello , [Mr. Smith]229-mr. smith , ”[2878-they] [they]2878-they say in unison . [I]0-i sip [my]0-i scotch as [my]0-i eyes drink them in . “ Where would [you]229-mr. smith like [us]2878-they , [sir]3064-sir ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i unbuckle [my]0-i belt . “ On [your]229-mr. smith knees . ”[0-i] Chapter 1 [Brielle Customs]78-brielle customs is ridiculously slow and [a man]3093-a man has been pulled into [the office]444-the office up ahead . It all looks very suspicious from [my]0-i position at the back of the line . “ What do [you]233-emerson think [he]3093-a man did ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper as [I]0-i crane [my]0-i neck to spy the commotion up ahead . “ [I]233-emerson do n’t know , something stupid , probably , ”[233-emerson] [Emerson]233-emerson replies . [We]2881-we shuffle toward the desk as the line moves a little quicker . [We]2881-we ’ve just arrived in [London]8-london to begin [our]2881-we yearlong working holiday . [I]0-i ’m going to work for [a judge]2870-a judge as [a nanny]2883-a nanny , while [Emerson]233-emerson , [[my]0-i best friend]2830-my best friend , is working for [an art auctioneer]2885-an art auctioneer . [I]0-i ’m terrified , yet excited . “ [I]233-emerson wish [we]2881-we had come a week earlier so [we]2881-we could have spent some time together , ”[233-emerson] [Emerson]233-emerson says . “ Yeah , [I]233-emerson know , but [she]4751-she needed [me]233-emerson to start this week because [she]4751-she ’s going away next week . [I]233-emerson need to learn [the kids]3241-the kids ’ routine . ”[233-emerson] “ Who leaves [[their]3241-the kids kids]4753-their kids alone for three days with [a complete stranger]4754-a complete stranger ? ”[91-emily] [Em]91-emily frowns in disgust . [I]0-i shrug . “ [[My]0-i new boss]4755-my new boss , apparently . ”[0-i] “ Well , at least [I]233-emerson can come and stay with [you]0-i next week . That ’s a bonus . ”[233-emerson] [My]0-i position is residential , so [[my]0-i accommodation]2886-my accommodation is secure . However , [poor Emerson]233-emerson will be living with [two strangers]2887-two strangers . [She]233-emerson ’s freaking out over it . “ Yeah , but [I]0-i ’m sneaking [you]0-i in , ”[0-i] [I]0-i say . “ [I]0-i do n’t want it to look like [we]4756-we ’re partying or anything . ”[0-i] [I]0-i look around [the airport]276-the airport . [It]276-the airport ’s busy , bustling , and [I]0-i already feel so alive . [Emerson]233-emerson and [I]0-i are more than just [young travelers]2889-young travelers . [Emerson]233-emerson is trying to find [her]233-emerson purpose and [I]0-i ’m running from a destructive past , one that involves [me]0-i being in love with [an adulterous prick]2890-an adulterous prick . [I]0-i loved [him]2890-an adulterous prick . [He]2890-an adulterous prick just did n’t love [me]0-i . Not enough , anyway . If [he]2890-an adulterous prick had , [he]2890-an adulterous prick would have kept it in [his]2890-an adulterous prick pants , and [I]0-i would n’t be at [Heathrow Airport]1-heathrow airport feeling like [I]0-i ’m about to throw up . [I]0-i look down at [myself]0-i and smooth the wrinkles from [my]0-i dress . “ [She]4757-she ’s picking [me]0-i up . Do [I]0-i look okay ? ”[0-i] [Emerson]233-emerson looks [me]0-i up and down , smiling broadly . “ [You]0-i look exactly how [a twenty - five - year - old nanny from [Australia]79-australia]4758-a twenty - five - year - old nanny from australia should . ”[233-emerson] [I]0-i bite [my]0-i bottom lip to stop [myself]0-i from smiling stupidly . That was a good answer . “ So , what ’s [[your]0-i boss]4759-your boss ’s name ? ”[233-emerson] [she]233-emerson asks . [I]0-i rustle around in [my]0-i bag for [my]0-i phone and scroll through the emails until [I]0-i get to the one from [the nanny agency]2891-the nanny agency . “ [Mrs. Julian Masters]234-julian masters . ”[233-emerson] [Emerson]233-emerson nods . “ And what ’s [her]234-julian masters story again ? [I]233-emerson know [you]233-emerson ’ve told [me]233-emerson before but [I]233-emerson ’ve forgotten . ”[233-emerson] “ [She]234-julian masters ’s [a Supreme Court judge]4760-a supreme court judge , widowed five years ago . ”[233-emerson] “ What happened to [the husband]4761-the husband ? ”[233-emerson] “ [I]0-i do n’t know , but apparently [she]234-julian masters ’s quite wealthy . ”[0-i] [I]0-i shrug . “ [Two kids]2869-two kids , well behaved . ”[0-i] “ Sounds good . ”[233-emerson] “ [I]233-emerson hope so . [I]233-emerson hope [they]2869-two kids like [me]233-emerson . ”[233-emerson] “ [They]2869-two kids will . ”[2892-we] [We]2892-we move forward in the line . “ [We]2892-we are definitely going out at the weekend though , yes ? ”[2892-we] “ Yes . ”[0-i] [I]0-i nod . “ What are [you]0-i going to do until then ? ”[233-emerson] [Emerson]233-emerson shrugs . “ Look around . [I]233-emerson start work on Monday and it ’s Thursday today . ”[233-emerson] [She]233-emerson frowns as [she]233-emerson watches [me]0-i . “ Are [you]0-i sure [you]0-i can go out on the weekends ? ”[233-emerson] “ Yes , ”[0-i] [I]0-i snap , exasperated . “ [I]0-i told [you]233-emerson a thousand times , [we]2892-we ’re going out on Saturday night . ”[0-i] [Emerson]233-emerson nods nervously . [I]0-i think [she]233-emerson may be more nervous than [I]0-i am , but at least [I]0-i ’m acting brave . “ Did [you]233-emerson get [your]233-emerson phone sorted ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ No , not yet . [I]0-i ’ll find [a phone shop]4763-a phone shop tomorrow so [I]0-i can call [you]233-emerson . ”[0-i] “ Okay . ”[2893-we] [We]2893-we are called to the front of the line , and finally , half an hour later , [we]2893-we walk into [the arrival lounge of [Heathrow International Airport]80-heathrow international airport]2894-the arrival lounge of heathrow international airport . “ Do [you]233-emerson see [our]2893-we names ? ”[233-emerson] [Emerson]233-emerson whispers as [we]2893-we both look around . “ No . ”[233-emerson] “ Shit , [no one]2205-no one is here to pick [us]2893-we up . Typical . ”[233-emerson] [She]233-emerson begins to panic . “ Relax , [they]4765-they will be here , ”[0-i] [I]0-i mutter . “ What do [we]2893-we do if [no one]2205-no one turns up ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i raise [my]0-i eyebrow as [I]0-i consider the possibility . “ Well , [I]0-i do n’t know about [you]233-emerson , but [I]0-i ’m going to lose [my]0-i shit . ”[0-i] [Emerson]233-emerson looks over [my]0-i shoulder . “ Oh , look , there ’s [your]0-i name . [She]4767-she must have sent [a driver]3197-a driver . ”[233-emerson] [I]0-i turn to see [a tall , broad man in a navy suit]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit holding a sign with the name Brielle Johnston on it . [I]0-i force a smile and wave meekly as [I]0-i feel [my]0-i anxiety rise like a tidal wave in [my]0-i stomach . [He]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit walks over and smiles at [me]0-i . “ [Brielle]235-brielle ? ”[2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit] [His]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit voice is deep and commanding . “ Yes , that ’s [me]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit , ”[2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit] [I]0-i breathe . [He]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit holds out [his]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit hand to shake [mine]0-i . “ [Julian Masters]234-julian masters . ”[2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit] What ? [My]0-i eyes widen . [A man]3093-a man ? [He]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit raises [his]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit eyebrows . “ Um , so , [I]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit ’m . . . [I]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit ’m [Brielle]235-brielle , ”[2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit] [I]0-i stammer as [I]0-i push [my]0-i hand out . “ And this is [[my]0-i friend [Emerson]233-emerson , who [I]0-i ’m traveling with]4769-my friend emerson , who i ’m traveling with . ”[0-i] [He]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit takes [my]0-i hand in [his]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit and [my]0-i heart races . A trace of a smile crosses [his]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit face before [he]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit covers it . “ Nice to meet [you]0-i . ”[2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit] [He]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit turns to [Emerson]233-emerson and shakes [her]233-emerson hand . “ How do [you]0-i do ? ”[2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit] [My]0-i eyes flash to [Emerson]233-emerson , who is clearly loving this shit . [She]233-emerson grins brightly . “ Hello . ”[233-emerson] “ [I]0-i thought [you]233-emerson were [a woman]381-a woman , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [His]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit brows furrow . “ Last time [I]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit checked [I]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit was [all man]4771-all man . ”[2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit] [His]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit eyes hold [mine]0-i . Why did [I]0-i just say that out loud ? Oh [my]0-i God , stop talking . This is so awkward . [I]0-i want to go [home]3076-home . This is a bad idea . “ [I]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit ’ll wait over here . ”[2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit] [He]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit gestures to the corner before marching off in that direction . [My]0-i horrified eyes meet [Emerson]233-emerson ’s , and [she]233-emerson giggles , so [I]0-i punch [her]233-emerson hard in the arm . “ Oh , [my]0-i fuck , [he]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit ’s [a fucking man]4772-a fucking man , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper angrily . “ [I]233-emerson can see that . ”[233-emerson] [She]233-emerson smirks , [her]233-emerson eyes fixed on [him]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit . “ Excuse [me]233-emerson , [Mr. Masters]85-mr. masters ? ”[233-emerson] [I]0-i call after [him]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit . [He]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit turns . “ Yes . ”[2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit] [We]2898-we both wither under [his]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit glare . “ [We]2898-we . . . [we]2898-we are just going to use [the bathroom]328-the bathroom , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper nervously . With one curt nod , [he]2895-a tall , broad man in a navy suit gestures to the right . [We]2898-we look up and see the sign . [I]0-i grab [Emerson]233-emerson by the arm and drag [her]233-emerson into [the bathroom]328-the bathroom . “ [I]0-i ’m not working with [a stuffy old man]4774-a stuffy old man ! ”[0-i] [I]0-i shriek as [we]2898-we burst through the door . “ It will be okay . How did this happen ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i take out [my]0-i phone and scroll through the emails quickly . [I]0-i knew it . “ It says [woman]3347-woman . [I]0-i knew it said [woman]3347-woman . ”[0-i] “ [He]4774-a stuffy old man ’s not that old , ”[233-emerson] [she]233-emerson calls out from [[her]233-emerson cubicle]2900-her cubicle . “ [I]233-emerson would prefer to work for [a man]3093-a man than [a woman]381-a woman , to be honest . ”[233-emerson] “ [You]0-i know what , [Emerson]233-emerson ? This is a shit idea . How the hell did [I]233-emerson let [you]233-emerson talk [me]233-emerson into this ? ”[233-emerson] [She]233-emerson smiles as [she]233-emerson exits [the cubicle]2901-the cubicle and washes [her]233-emerson hands . “ It does n’t matter . [You]233-emerson ’ll hardly see [him]4774-a stuffy old man anyway , and [you]233-emerson ’re not working weekends when [he]4774-a stuffy old man ’s [home]3076-home . ”[233-emerson] [She]233-emerson ’s clearly trying to calm [me]0-i . “ Stop with the carry on . ”[233-emerson] Stop the carry on . Steam feels like it ’s shooting from [my]0-i ears . “ [I]233-emerson ’m going to kill [you]233-emerson . [I]233-emerson ’m going to fucking kill [you]233-emerson . ”[233-emerson] [Emerson]233-emerson bites [her]233-emerson lip to stifle [her]233-emerson smile . “ Listen , just stay with [him]4774-a stuffy old man until [we]4780-we find [you]233-emerson something else . [I]233-emerson will get [my]233-emerson phone sorted tomorrow and [we]4780-we can start looking elsewhere for another job , ”[233-emerson] [she]233-emerson reassures [me]0-i . “ At least [someone]401-someone picked [you]233-emerson up . [Nobody]3121-nobody cares about [me]233-emerson at all . ”[233-emerson] [I]0-i put [my]0-i head into [my]0-i hands as [I]0-i try to calm [my]0-i breathing . “ This is a disaster , [Em]91-emily , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . Suddenly every fear [I]0-i had about traveling is coming true . [I]0-i feel completely out of [my]0-i comfort zone . “ It ’s going to be one week . . . tops . ”[0-i] [My]0-i scared eyes lift to hold [hers]233-emerson , and [I]0-i nod . “ Okay ? ”[233-emerson] [She]233-emerson smiles as [she]233-emerson pulls [me]0-i into a hug . “ Okay . ”[233-emerson] [I]0-i glance back in the mirror , fix [my]0-i hair , and straighten [my]0-i dress . [I]0-i ’m completely rattled . [We]2902-we walk back out and take [our]2902-we place next to [Mr. Masters]85-mr. masters . [He]85-mr. masters ’s in [his]85-mr. masters late thirties , immaculately dressed , and kind of attractive . [His]85-mr. masters hair is dark with a sprinkle of gray . “ Did [you]0-i have a good flight ? ”[85-mr. masters] [he]85-mr. masters asks as [he]85-mr. masters looks down at [me]0-i . “ Yes , thanks , ”[85-mr. masters] [I]0-i push out . Oh , that sounded so forced . “ Thank [you]85-mr. masters for picking [us]2902-we up , ”[0-i] [I]0-i add meekly . [He]85-mr. masters nods with no fuss . [Emerson]233-emerson smiles at the floor as [she]2903-her tries to hide [her]2903-her smile . [That bitch]3902-that bitch is loving this shit . “ [Emerson]233-emerson ? ”[2905-a male voice] [a male voice]2905-a male voice calls . [We]2902-we all turn to see [a blond man]1145-a blond man , and [Emerson]233-emerson ’s face falls . Ha ! Now it ’s [my]0-i turn to laugh . “ Hello , [I]1145-a blond man ’m [Mark]236-mark . ”[1145-a blond man] [He]1145-a blond man kisses [her]2903-her on the cheek and then turns to [me]0-i . “ [You]0-i must be [Brielle]235-brielle ? ”[1145-a blond man] “ Yes . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile then turn to [Mr. Masters]85-mr. masters . “ And this is . . . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause because [I]0-i do n’t know how to introduce [him]85-mr. masters . “ [Julian Masters]234-julian masters , ”[85-mr. masters] [he]85-mr. masters finishes for [me]0-i , adding in a strong handshake . [Emerson]233-emerson and [I]0-i fake smile at [each other]351-each other . Oh , dear God , help [me]0-i . [Emerson]233-emerson stands and talks with [Mark]236-mark and [Mr. Masters]85-mr. masters , while [I]0-i stand in uncomfortable silence . “ [The car]422-the car is this way . ”[85-mr. masters] [He]85-mr. masters gestures to the right . [I]0-i nod nervously . Oh God , do n’t leave [me]0-i with [him]85-mr. masters . This is terrifying . “ Nice to meet [you]2908-you , [Emerson]233-emerson and [Mark]236-mark . ”[85-mr. masters] [He]85-mr. masters shakes [their]2908-you hands . “ [Likewise]237-likewise . Please look after [[my]233-emerson friend]3515-my friend , ”[233-emerson] [Emerson]233-emerson whispers as [her]233-emerson eyes flicker to [mine]0-i . [Mr. Masters]85-mr. masters nods , smiles , and then pulls [my]0-i luggage behind [him]85-mr. masters as [he]85-mr. masters walks to [the car]422-the car . [Emerson]233-emerson pulls [me]0-i into an embrace . “ This is shit , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper into [her]233-emerson hair . “ It will be fine . [He]85-mr. masters ’s probably really nice . ”[0-i] “ [He]85-mr. masters does n’t look nice , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ Yeah , [I]236-mark agree . [He]85-mr. masters looks like a tool , ”[236-mark] [Mark]236-mark adds as [he]236-mark watches [him]85-mr. masters disappear through [the crowd]287-the crowd . [Emerson]233-emerson throws [[her]233-emerson new friend]2911-her new friend a dirty look , and [I]0-i smirk . [I]0-i think [[her]233-emerson friend]1064-her friend is more annoying than [mine]0-i , but anyway . . . “ [Mark]236-mark , look after [[my]236-mark friend]3515-my friend , please ? ”[236-mark] [He]236-mark beats [his]236-mark chest like a gorilla . “ Oh , [I]233-emerson intend to . ”[233-emerson] [Emerson]233-emerson ’s eyes meet [mine]0-i . [She]233-emerson subtly shakes [her]233-emerson head and [I]0-i bite [my]0-i bottom lip to hide [my]0-i smile . [This guy]289-this guy is [a dick]323-a dick . [We]2915-we both look over to see [Mr. Masters]85-mr. masters looking back impatiently . “ [I]0-i better go , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . “ [You]85-mr. masters have [[my]0-i apartment]940-my apartment details if [you]85-mr. masters need [me]0-i ? ”[0-i] “ [I]233-emerson ’ll probably turn up in an hour . Tell [[your]85-mr. masters roommates]4787-your roommates [I]233-emerson ’m coming in case [I]233-emerson need a key . ”[233-emerson] [She]233-emerson laughs and waves [me]0-i off , and [I]0-i go to [Mr. Masters]85-mr. masters . [He]85-mr. masters sees [me]0-i coming and then starts to walk again . God , can [he]85-mr. masters not even wait for [me]0-i ? So rude . [He]85-mr. masters walks out of [the building]412-the building into [the VIP parking section]2917-the vip parking section . [I]0-i follow [him]85-mr. masters in complete silence . Any notion that [I]0-i was going to become friends with [[my]0-i new boss]4755-my new boss has been thrown out the window . [I]0-i think [he]85-mr. masters hates [me]0-i already . Just wait until [he]85-mr. masters finds out that [I]0-i lied on [my]0-i résumé and [I]0-i have no fucking idea what [I]0-i ’m doing . Nerves flutter in [my]0-i stomach at the thought . [We]2919-we get to [a large , swanky , black SUV]2920-a large , swanky , black suv , and [he]85-mr. masters clicks it open to put [my]0-i suitcase in the trunk . [He]85-mr. masters opens the back door for [me]0-i to get in . “ Thank [you]0-i . ”[85-mr. masters] [I]0-i smile awkwardly as [I]0-i slide into the seat . [He]85-mr. masters wants [me]0-i to sit in the back when the front seat is empty . [This man]327-this man is odd . [He]85-mr. masters slides into the front seat and eventually pulls out into the traffic . All [I]0-i can do is clutch [my]0-i handbag in [my]0-i lap . Should [I]0-i say something ? Try and make conversation ? What will [I]0-i say ? “ Do [you]85-mr. masters live far from [here]275-here ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i ask . “ Twenty minutes , ”[85-mr. masters] [he]85-mr. masters replies , [his]85-mr. masters tone clipped . Oh . . . is that it ? Okay , shut up now . [He]85-mr. masters does n’t want a conversation . For ten long minutes , [we]2922-we sit in silence . “ [You]85-mr. masters can drive [this car]4037-this car when [you]85-mr. masters have [the children]4790-the children , or [we]2922-we have [a small minivan]4791-a small minivan . The choice is [yours]85-mr. masters . ”[85-mr. masters] “ Oh , okay . ”[0-i] [I]0-i pause for a moment . “ Is this [[your]85-mr. masters car]3532-your car ? ”[0-i] “ No . ”[85-mr. masters] [He]85-mr. masters turns onto [a street]2923-a street and into a driveway with huge sandstone gates . “ [I]85-mr. masters drive [a Porsche]4793-a porsche , ”[85-mr. masters] [he]85-mr. masters replies casually . “ Oh . ”[85-mr. masters] [The driveway]1971-the driveway goes on and on and on . [I]0-i look around at [the perfectly kept grounds]2925-the perfectly kept grounds and [rolling green hills]2926-rolling green hills . With every meter [we]2922-we pass , [I]0-i feel [my]0-i heart beat just that bit faster . As if it is n’t bad enough that [I]0-i ca n’t do the whole nanny thing . . . [I]0-i really ca n’t do the rich thing . [I]0-i have no idea what to do with [polite company]2927-polite company . [I]0-i do n’t even know what fork to use at dinner . [I]0-i ’ve got [myself]0-i into a right mess here . [The house]3072-the house comes into focus and the blood drains from [my]0-i face . It ’s not [a house]2929-a house , not even close . [It]3072-the house ’s [a mansion]2930-a mansion , white and sandstone with a castle kind of feel to [it]3072-the house , with [six garages to the left]2931-six garages to the left . [He]2932-he pulls into [the large circular driveway]2933-the large circular driveway , stopping under the awning . “ [[Your]2932-he house]3402-your house is beautiful , ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . [He]2932-he nods , as [his]2932-he eyes stay fixed out front . “ [We]4795-we are fortunate . ”[2932-he] [He]2932-he gets out of [the car]422-the car and opens [my]0-i door for [me]0-i . [I]0-i climb out as [I]0-i grip [my]0-i handbag with white - knuckle force . [My]0-i eyes rise up to [the luxurious building in front of [me]0-i]2935-the luxurious building in front of me . This is an insane amount of money . [He]2932-he retrieves [my]0-i suitcase and wheels it around to the side of [the building]412-the building . “ [[Your]0-i entrance]4796-your entrance is around to the side , ”[2932-he] [he]2932-he says . [I]0-i follow [him]2932-he up a path until [we]2937-we get to a door , which [he]2932-he opens and lets [me]0-i walk through . There is [a foyer]2938-a foyer and [a living area in front of [me]0-i]2939-a living area in front of me . “ [The kitchen]818-the kitchen is this way . ”[2932-he] [He]2932-he points to [the kitchen]818-the kitchen . “ And [[your]0-i bedroom]4798-your bedroom is in the back - left corner . ”[2932-he] [I]0-i nod and walk past [him]2932-he , into [the apartment]3531-the apartment . [He]2932-he stands at the door but does n’t come in . “ [The bathroom]328-the bathroom is to the right , ”[2932-he] [he]2932-he continues . Why is n’t [he]2932-he coming in [here]275-here ? “ Okay , thanks , ”[0-i] [I]0-i reply . “ Order any groceries [you]0-i want on the family shopping order and . . . ”[0-i] [He]2932-he pauses , as if collecting [his]2932-he thoughts . “ If there is anything else [you]0-i need , please talk to [me]2932-he first . ”[2932-he] [I]0-i frown . “ First ? ”[2932-he] [He]2932-he shrugs . “ [I]2932-he do n’t want to be told about a problem for the first time when reading a resignation letter . ”[2932-he] “ Oh . ”[2932-he] Did that happen before ? “ Of course , ”[0-i] [I]0-i mutter . “ If [you]0-i would like to come and meet [the children]4790-the children . . . ”[2932-he] [He]2932-he gestures to [a hallway]486-a hallway . “ Yes , please . ”[2932-he] Oh God , here [we]2944-we go . [I]0-i follow [him]2932-he out into [a corridor with glass walls that looks out onto [the main house]2946-the main house , which is about four meters away]2945-a corridor with glass walls that looks out onto the main house , which is about four meters away . [A garden]2947-a garden sits between [the two buildings]2948-the two buildings creating [an atrium]2949-an atrium , and [I]0-i smile as [I]0-i look up in wonder . There is a large window in [the main house]2946-the main house that looks into [the kitchen]818-the kitchen . [I]0-i can see beyond that into the living area from [the corridor]728-the corridor where [a young girl]2953-a young girl and [small boy]2954-small boy are watching television together . [We]2944-we continue to the end of [the glass corridor]2955-the glass corridor where there is a staircase with six steps leading up to [the main house]2946-the main house . [I]0-i blow out a breath , and [I]0-i follow [Mr. Masters]85-mr. masters up the stairs . “ [Children]4801-children , come and meet [[your]4801-children new nanny]4802-your new nanny . ”[85-mr. masters] [The little boy]2957-the little boy jumps down and rushes over to [me]0-i , clearly excited , while [the girl]2958-the girl just looks up and rolls [her]2958-the girl eyes . [I]0-i smile to [myself]0-i , remembering what it ’s like to be [a typical teenager]2959-a typical teenager . “ Hello , [I]2957-the little boy ’m [Samuel]238-samuel . ”[2957-the little boy] [The little boy]2957-the little boy smiles as [he]2957-the little boy wraps [his]2957-the little boy arms around [my]0-i legs . [He]2957-the little boy has dark hair , is wearing glasses , and [he]2957-the little boy ’s so damn cute . “ Hello , [Samuel]238-samuel . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile . “ This is [Willow]239-willow , ”[2957-the little boy] [he]2957-the little boy introduces . [I]0-i smile at [the teenage girl]2961-the teenage girl . “ Hello . ”[0-i] [She]2961-the teenage girl folds [her]2961-the teenage girl arms across [her]2961-the teenage girl chest defiantly . “ Hi , ”[2961-the teenage girl] [she]2961-the teenage girl grumbles . [Mr. Masters]85-mr. masters holds [her]2961-the teenage girl gaze for a moment , saying so much with just one look . [Willow]239-willow eventually holds [her]239-willow hand out for [me]0-i to shake . “ [I]239-willow ’m [Willow]239-willow . ”[239-willow] [I]0-i smile as [my]0-i eyes flash up to [Mr. Masters]85-mr. masters . [He]85-mr. masters can keep [her]239-willow under control with just a simple glare . [Samuel]238-samuel runs back to [the lounge]273-the lounge , grabs something , and then comes straight back . [I]0-i see a flash . Click , click . What the hell ? [He]85-mr. masters has a small instant Polaroid camera . [He]85-mr. masters watches [my]0-i face appear on the piece of paper in front of [him]85-mr. masters before [he]85-mr. masters looks back up at [me]0-i . “ [You]0-i ’re pretty . ”[85-mr. masters] [He]85-mr. masters smiles . “ [I]85-mr. masters ’m putting this on the fridge . ”[85-mr. masters] [He]85-mr. masters carefully pins it to the fridge with a magnet . [Mr. Masters]85-mr. masters seems to become flustered for some reason . “ Bedtime for [[you]2963-you two]3244-you two , ”[85-mr. masters] [he]85-mr. masters instructs , and [they]2963-you both complain . [He]85-mr. masters turns [his]85-mr. masters attention back to [me]0-i . “ [[Your]2963-you kitchen]4804-your kitchen is stocked with groceries , and [I]85-mr. masters ’m sure [you]2963-you ’re tired . ”[85-mr. masters] [I]0-i fake a smile . Oh , [I]0-i ’m being dismissed . “ Yes , of course . ”[0-i] [I]0-i go to walk back down to [[my]0-i apartment]940-my apartment , and then turn back to [him]85-mr. masters . “ What time do [I]0-i start tomorrow ? ”[0-i] [His]85-mr. masters eyes hold [mine]0-i . “ When [you]0-i hear [Samuel]238-samuel wake up . ”[0-i] “ Yes , of course . ”[0-i] [My]0-i eyes search [his]85-mr. masters as [I]0-i wait for [him]85-mr. masters to say something else , but it does n’t come . “ Good night then . ”[0-i] [I]0-i smile awkwardly . “ Good night . ”[0-i] “ Bye , [Brielle]235-brielle . ”[238-samuel] [Samuel]238-samuel smiles , and [Willow]239-willow ignores [me]0-i , walking away and up the stairs . [I]0-i walk back down into [[my]0-i apartment]940-my apartment and close the door behind [me]0-i . Then [I]0-i flop onto the bed and stare up at the ceiling . What have [I]0-i done ? It ’s midnight and [I]0-i ’m thirsty , but [I]0-i have looked everywhere and [I]0-i still can not find a glass . There ’s no other option ; [I]0-i ’m going to have to sneak up into [the main house]2946-the main house to find one . [I]0-i ’m wearing [my]0-i silky white nightdress , but [I]0-i ’m sure [they]2967-they are all in bed . Sneaking out into [the darkened corridor]2968-the darkened corridor , [I]0-i can see into [the lit - up house]2969-the lit - up house . [I]0-i suddenly catch sight of [Mr. Masters]85-mr. masters sitting in the armchair reading a book . [He]85-mr. masters has a glass of red wine in [his]85-mr. masters hand . [I]0-i stand in the dark , unable to tear [my]0-i eyes away . There ’s something about [him]85-mr. masters that fascinates [me]0-i but [I]0-i do n’t quite know what it is . [He]85-mr. masters stands abruptly , and [I]0-i push [myself]0-i back against the wall . Can [he]85-mr. masters see [me]0-i here in the dark ? Shit . [My]0-i eyes follow [him]85-mr. masters as [he]85-mr. masters walks into [the kitchen]818-the kitchen . The only thing [he]85-mr. masters ’s wearing is [his]85-mr. masters navy - blue boxer shorts . [His]85-mr. masters dark hair has messy , loose waves on top . [His]85-mr. masters chest is broad , [his]85-mr. masters body is . . . [My]0-i heart begins to beat faster . What am [I]0-i doing ? [I]0-i should n’t be standing here in the dark , watching [him]85-mr. masters like [a creep]2971-a creep , but for some reason [I]0-i ca n’t make [myself]0-i look away . [He]85-mr. masters goes to stand by the kitchen counter . [His]85-mr. masters back is to [me]0-i as [he]85-mr. masters pours [himself]85-mr. masters another glass of red . [He]85-mr. masters lifts it to [his]85-mr. masters lips slowly and [my]0-i eyes run over [his]85-mr. masters body . [I]0-i push [myself]0-i against the wall harder . [He]85-mr. masters walks over to the fridge and takes off the photo of [me]0-i . What ? [He]85-mr. masters leans [his]85-mr. masters ass on the counter as [he]85-mr. masters studies it . What is [he]85-mr. masters doing ? [I]0-i feel like [I]0-i ca n’t breathe . [He]85-mr. masters slowly puts [his]85-mr. masters hand down the front of [his]85-mr. masters boxer shorts , and then [he]85-mr. masters seems to stroke [himself]85-mr. masters a few times . [My]0-i eyes widen . What the fuck ? [He]85-mr. masters puts [his]85-mr. masters glass of wine on the counter and turns the main light off , leaving only a lamp to light [the room]613-the room . With [my]0-i picture in [his]85-mr. masters hand , [he]85-mr. masters disappears up [the hall]729-the hall . What the hell was that ? [I]0-i think [Mr. Masters]85-mr. masters just went up to [[his]85-mr. masters bedroom]933-his bedroom to jerk off to [my]0-i photo . Oh . [My]0-i . God . Knock , knock . [My]0-i eyes are closed , but [I]0-i frown and try to ignore the noise . [I]0-i hear it again . Tap , tap . What is that ? [I]0-i roll toward the door and [I]0-i see it slowly begin to open . [My]0-i eyes widen , and [I]0-i sit up quickly . [Mr. Masters]85-mr. masters comes into view . “ [I]85-mr. masters ’m so sorry to bother [you]0-i , [Miss Brielle]235-brielle , ”[85-mr. masters] [he]85-mr. masters whispers . [He]85-mr. masters smells like [he]85-mr. masters ’s freshly showered , and [he]85-mr. masters ’s wearing an immaculate suit . “ [I]85-mr. masters ’m looking for [Samuel]238-samuel . ”[85-mr. masters] [His]85-mr. masters gaze roams down to [my]0-i breasts hanging loosely in [my]0-i nightdress , and then [he]85-mr. masters snaps [his]85-mr. masters eyes back up to [my]0-i face , as if [he]85-mr. masters ’s horrified at what [he]85-mr. masters just did . “ Where is [he]238-samuel ? ”[85-mr. masters] [I]0-i frown . “ Is [he]238-samuel missing ? ”[85-mr. masters] “ There [he]238-samuel is , ”[85-mr. masters] [he]85-mr. masters whispers as [he]85-mr. masters gestures to the lounger . [I]0-i look over to see [Samuel]238-samuel curled up with [his]238-samuel teddy in the diluted light of [the room]613-the room . [My]0-i mouth falls open . “ Oh no , what ’s wrong ? ”[0-i] [I]0-i whisper . Did [he]85-mr. masters need [me]0-i and [I]0-i slept through the whole thing ? “ Nothing , ”[85-mr. masters] [Mr. Masters]85-mr. masters murmurs as [he]85-mr. masters picks [Samuel]238-samuel up and rests [[his]85-mr. masters son]2976-his son ’s head on [his]85-mr. masters strong shoulder . “ [He]238-samuel ’s [a sleepwalker]4805-a sleepwalker . Sorry to disturb [you]0-i . [I]85-mr. masters ’ve got this now . ”[85-mr. masters] [He]85-mr. masters leaves [the room]613-the room with [[his]85-mr. masters small son]2978-his small son safely asleep in [his]85-mr. masters arms . The door gently clicks closed behind [them]2979-them . [I]0-i lie back down and stare at the ceiling in the silence . [That poor little boy]2980-that poor little boy . [He]2980-that poor little boy came in [here]275-here to see [me]0-i and [I]0-i did n’t even wake up . [I]0-i was probably snoring , for fuck ’s sake . What if [he]2980-that poor little boy was scared ? Oh , [I]0-i feel like shit now . [I]0-i blow out a deep breath , lift [myself]0-i up to sit on the edge of the bed , and [I]0-i put [my]0-i head into [my]0-i hands . [I]0-i need to up [my]0-i game . If [I]0-i ’m in charge of looking after [this kid]2982-this kid , [I]0-i ca n’t have [him]2980-that poor little boy wandering around at night on [his]2980-that poor little boy own . Is [he]2980-that poor little boy that lonely that [he]2980-that poor little boy was looking for company from [me]0-i — [a complete stranger]4754-a complete stranger ? Unexplained sadness rolls over [me]0-i , and [I]0-i suddenly feel like the weight of [the world]268-the world is on [my]0-i shoulders . [I]0-i look around [[my]0-i room]361-my room for a moment as [I]0-i think . Eventually , [I]0-i get up and go to [the bathroom]328-the bathroom , and then walk to the window to pull the heavy drapes back . It ’s just getting light , and a white mist hangs over [the paddocks]2987-the paddocks . Something catches [my]0-i eye and [I]0-i look down to see [Mr. Masters]85-mr. masters walking out to [the garage]3930-the garage . Wearing a dark suit and carrying a briefcase , [he]85-mr. masters disappears , and moments later [I]0-i see [[his]85-mr. masters Porsche]2989-his porsche pull out and disappear up [the driveway]1971-the driveway . [I]0-i watch as the garage door slowly closes behind [him]85-mr. masters . [He]85-mr. masters ’s gone to work for the day . What the hell ? [[His]85-mr. masters son]2976-his son was just found asleep on [my]0-i lounger and [he]85-mr. masters just plops [him]2976-his son back into [his]85-mr. masters own bed and leaves for the day . Who does that ? Well , screw this , [I]0-i ’m going to go and check on [him]85-mr. masters . [He]85-mr. masters ’s probably [upstairs]3211-upstairs crying , scared out of [his]85-mr. masters brain . [Stupid men]705-stupid men . Why do n’t [they]705-stupid men have an inch of fucking empathy for [anyone]295-anyone but [themselves]705-stupid men ? [He]85-mr. masters ’s eight , for Christ ’s sake ! [I]0-i walk up into [the main house]2946-the main house . The lamp is still on in [the living room]906-the living room and [I]0-i can smell the eggs that [Mr. Masters]85-mr. masters cooked [himself]85-mr. masters for breakfast . [I]0-i look around , and then go up the grand staircase . Honestly , what the hell have [I]0-i got [myself]0-i into [here]275-here ? [I]0-i ’m in [[some stupid rich twat]2998-some stupid rich twat ’s house]2999-some stupid rich twat ’s house , worried about [[his]85-mr. masters child who [he]85-mr. masters clearly does n’t give a fuck about]3000-his child who he clearly does n’t give a fuck about . [I]0-i storm up [the stairs]2393-the stairs , taking two at a time . [I]0-i get to the top and the change of scenery suddenly makes [me]0-i feel nervous . It ’s luxurious up [here]275-here . [The corridor]728-the corridor is wide , and the cream carpet feels lush beneath [my]0-i feet . A huge mirror hangs in [the hall]729-the hall on the wall . [I]0-i catch a glimpse of [myself]0-i and cringe . God , no wonder [he]85-mr. masters was looking at [my]0-i boobs . They are hanging out everywhere , and [my]0-i hair is wild . [I]0-i readjust [my]0-i nightgown over [my]0-i breasts and continue up [the hall]729-the hall . [I]0-i pass [a living area that seems to be for [the children]4790-the children , with big comfy loungers inside [it]3006-a living area that seems to be for the children , with big comfy loungers inside it]3006-a living area that seems to be for the children , with big comfy loungers inside it . [I]0-i pass [a bedroom]2054-a bedroom , and then [I]0-i get to a door that is closed . [I]0-i open it carefully and allow [myself]0-i to peer in . [Willow]239-willow is fast asleep , still scowling , though . [I]0-i smirk and slowly shut [her]239-willow door to continue down [the hall]729-the hall . Eventually , [I]0-i get to a door that is slightly ajar . [I]0-i peer around it and see [Samuel]238-samuel sound asleep , tucked in nice and tight . [I]0-i walk into [[his]238-samuel room]677-his room and sit on the side of the bed . [He]238-samuel ’s wearing bright blue and green dinosaur pajamas , and [his]238-samuel little glasses are on [his]238-samuel side table , beside [his]238-samuel lamp . [I]0-i find [myself]0-i smiling as [I]0-i watch [him]238-samuel . Unable to help it , [I]0-i put [my]0-i hand out and push the dark hair from [his]238-samuel forehead . [[His]238-samuel bedroom]933-his bedroom is neat and tidy , filled with expensive furniture . It kind of looks like [you]3012-you would imagine [[a child]1965-a child ’s bedroom]3014-a child ’s bedroom being set out in a perfect family movie . Everything in [this house]3015-this house is the absolute best of the best . Just how much money does [Mr. Masters]85-mr. masters have ? There ’s a bookcase , a desk , a wingback chair in the corner , and a toy box . The window has a bench seat running underneath it , and there are a few books sitting in a pile on the cushion , as if [Samuel]238-samuel reads there a lot . [I]0-i glance over to the armchair in the corner to [his]238-samuel school clothes all laid out for [him]238-samuel . Everything is there , folded neatly , right down to [his]238-samuel socks and shiny , polished shoes . [His]238-samuel school bag is packed , too . [I]0-i stand and walk over to look at [his]238-samuel things . [Mr. Masters]85-mr. masters must do this before [he]238-samuel goes to bed . What must it be like to bring [children]4801-children up alone ? [My]0-i mind goes to [[his]238-samuel wife]4465-his wife and how much [she]4465-his wife is missing out on . [Samuel]238-samuel is so young . With one last look at [Samuel]238-samuel , [I]0-i creep out of [the room]613-the room and head back down [the hall]729-the hall , until something catches [my]0-i eye . A light is on in [the en suite bathroom of [the main bedroom]3021-the main bedroom]3020-the en suite bathroom of the main bedroom . That must be [[Mr. Master]85-mr. masters ’s bedroom]3022-mr. master ’s bedroom . [I]0-i look left and then right ; [nobody]3121-nobody is awake . [I]0-i wonder what [[his]238-samuel room]677-his room is like , and [I]0-i ca n’t stop [myself]0-i from tiptoeing closer to inspect it . Wow . The bed is clearly king - size , and [the room]613-the room is grand , decorated in all different shades of coffee , complimented with dark antique furniture . A huge , expensive , gold and magenta embroidered rug sits on the floor beneath the bed . The light in the wardrobe is on . [I]0-i peer inside and see business shirts all lined up , neatly in a row . Super neatly , actually . [I]0-i ’m going to have to make sure [I]0-i keep [[my]0-i room]361-my room tidy or [he]238-samuel ’ll think [I]0-i ’m [a pig]3027-a pig . [I]0-i smirk because [I]0-i am one according to [his]238-samuel standards of living . [I]0-i turn to see [his]238-samuel bed has already been made , and [my]0-i eyes linger over the velvet quilt and lush pillows there . Did [he]238-samuel really touch [himself]238-samuel in [there]3073-there last night as [he]238-samuel thought of [me]0-i , or am [I]0-i completely delusional ? [I]0-i glance around for the photo of [me]0-i , but [I]0-i do n’t see it . [He]238-samuel must have taken it back [downstairs]3304-downstairs . An unexpected thrill runs through [me]0-i . [I]0-i may return the favor tonight in [[my]0-i own bed]3030-my own bed . [I]0-i walk into [the bathroom]328-the bathroom . [It]328-the bathroom ’s all black , gray , and very modern . Once again , [I]0-i notice that everything is very neat . There is a large mirror , and [I]0-i can see that a slender cabinet sits behind [it]328-the bathroom . [I]0-i push the mirror and the door pops open . [My]0-i eyes roam over the shelves . [You]3032-you can tell a lot about [people]267-people by [[their]267-people bathroom cabinet]3034-their bathroom cabinet . Deodorant . Razors . Talcum powder . Condoms . [I]0-i wonder how long ago [[his]238-samuel wife]4465-his wife died . Does [he]238-samuel have [a new girlfriend]3036-a new girlfriend ? It would n’t surprise [me]0-i . [He]238-samuel is kind of hot , in an old way . [I]0-i see a bottle of aftershave and [I]0-i pick it up , removing the lid before [I]0-i lift it up to [my]0-i nose . Heaven in a bottle . [I]0-i inhale deeply again , and [Mr. Master]85-mr. masters ’s face suddenly appears in the mirror behind [me]0-i . “ What the hell do [you]0-i think [you]0-i ’re doing ? ”[85-mr. masters] [he]85-mr. masters growls . ACKNOWLEDGMENTS There are no words meaningful enough to thank [[my]0-i wonderful team]3037-my wonderful team . [I]0-i do n’t write [my]0-i books alone . [I]0-i have an army . [The best army in [the world]268-the world]3038-the best army in the world . [Kellie]240-kellie , [the most wonderful PA on [earth]1165-earth]3040-the most wonderful pa on earth . [You]240-kellie are amazing . Thank [you]240-kellie for all that [you]240-kellie do for [me]0-i . [Keeley]111-molly , not only are [you]111-molly [an amazing daughter]3042-an amazing daughter , but [you]111-molly ’re now [a wonderful employee]3043-a wonderful employee . Thank [you]111-molly for wanting to work alongside [me]0-i . It means a lot . To [[my]0-i wonderful beta readers]3044-my wonderful beta readers : [Mum]241-mum , [Vicki]242-vicki , [Am]243-am , [Rachel]244-rachel , [Nicole]245-nicole , [Lisa K.]193-elizabeth , [Lisa D.]246-lisa d. , [Nadia]247-nadia , and [Charlotte]248-charlotte . Thank [you]111-molly . [You]111-molly put up with a lot and never whine , even when [I]0-i make [you]111-molly wait for the next chapter . How [I]0-i got so lucky to have [you]111-molly come into [my]0-i life and to be able to call [you]111-molly [[my]0-i friends]651-my friends , [I]0-i will never know . To [Rena]249-rena , [you]249-rena came into [my]0-i life like a breath of fresh air and somehow adopted [me]0-i . Thank [you]249-rena for believing in [me]0-i . [You]249-rena ’re the yin to [my]0-i yang , or the ting to [my]0-i tang . [Vic]242-vicki , [you]249-rena make [me]0-i better , and [your]249-rena friendship is so valued . [Virginia]250-virginia , thank [you]249-rena for everything [you]249-rena do for [me]0-i . It is so appreciated . To [my]0-i motivated mofos . [I]0-i love [you]249-rena to bits . [You]249-rena know who [you]249-rena are . To [Linda]251-linda and [[my]0-i PR team at [Forward]81-forward]3046-my pr team at forward . [You]249-rena have been with [me]0-i since the beginning , and [you]249-rena will be with [me]0-i until the end . Thank [you]249-rena for everything . To [[my]0-i homegirls in [the Swan Squad]82-the swan squad]3047-my homegirls in the swan squad . [I]0-i feel like [I]0-i can do anything with [[you]249-rena girls]3048-you girls in [[my]0-i corner]3049-my corner . Thanks for making [me]0-i laugh every single day . This year [I]0-i ’m adding someone new to [my]0-i list . [Amazon]252-amazon . Thank [you]249-rena for providing [me]0-i with an amazing platform to bring [my]0-i books to life . [I]0-i am [[my]0-i own boss]3050-my own boss . [Your]249-rena belief and support of [my]0-i work this last year have been nothing short of amazing . And to [my]0-i four reasons for living , [[my]0-i beautiful husband]3051-my beautiful husband and [three children]3052-three children . [Your]249-rena love is [my]0-i drug , [my]0-i motivation , and [my]0-i calling . Without [you]249-rena , [I]0-i have nothing . Everything [I]0-i do is for [you]249-rena . Gratitude . The quality of being thankful . Readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness . Trust in [the universe]3053-the universe . [It]3054-it always delivers . ABOUT [[THE AUTHOR]255-the author A psychologist in [her]3056-the author a psychologist in her former life former life]3056-the author a psychologist in her former life , [T L Swan]253-t l swan is now seriously addicted to the thrill of writing and ca n’t imagine a time when [she]3056-the author a psychologist in her former life was n’t . [She]3056-the author a psychologist in her former life resides in [Sydney]83-sydney , [Australia]79-australia , where [she]3056-the author a psychologist in her former life ’s living out [her]3056-the author a psychologist in her former life own happily ever after with [[her]3056-the author a psychologist in her former life husband]2440-her husband and [[their]3058-their three children]3059-their three children .